


There Is No Sweeter Innocence Than Our Gentle Sin

by livixbobbiex



Series: There Is No Sweeter Innocence Than Our Gentle Sin [1]
Category: Assassination Classroom
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canon deaths, Canon-Typical Violence, Fluff and Angst, Implied/Referenced Underage Drinking, Implied/Referenced Underage Sex, M/M, Mpreg, Not talking about their feelings, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Rating will change to E, Slow Burn, bad life choices, parenting
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-23
Updated: 2019-02-21
Packaged: 2019-03-08 09:50:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 70
Words: 277,520
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13455720
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/livixbobbiex/pseuds/livixbobbiex
Summary: Studying for finals is hard. Staging an assassination against an unkillable target is impossible. Even worse? Attempting it all whilst carrying your best friend's baby, of which you barely even remember... well, creating. Nagisa didn't know how his life had ended up like this.(Also known as the fic where Nagisa gets knocked up through an unlikely turn of events, Karma doesn't know how to deal with it, and the author has no idea what they'd have done if they didn't end up becoming literal billionaires)





	1. Mystery Illness Time

**Author's Note:**

> Warning: this fic contains mpreg and ABO dynamics. Also the non explicit implication of underage sex (Karma and Nagisa are their canon ages). Basically: don't like, don't read. This is your warning. On a lighter note, this was originally a headcanon that spiralled out of control. Whoops?
> 
> The title comes from Hozier's 'Take Me To Church'

__****When Nagisa felt the bile rise up in his throat for the fourth day in a row, following weeks of nausea, he just knew the fantasy was over for him. Since he’d known what the secondary genders even were, Nagisa had prayed that he’d turn out to be a beta, which was of course the most common. He wasn’t dumb enough to ever consider he’d be an alpha, from his frame alone that much was obvious, but he’d _hoped_ he’d turn out lucky enough.

After a few shameful google searches, avoiding the barrage of pornography that showed up, Nagisa concluded that the symptoms for an omega’s first heat perfectly lined up with his own condition. At almost fifteen, he was the right age for a presentation. The thought had made Nagisa shift awkwardly, and immediately delete his search history. His mum was about to have an absolute field day.

A week had passed since then, but yet nothing at all heat like. He wasn’t concerned exactly, though definitely cautious. He’d had to awkwardly purchase some emergency heat blocker (a deodorant like thing which masked the scene of omega heat) from the pharmacy, just in case anything did happen. Mostly, Nagisa was just tired, sick, and hormonal. He supposed that his body was just preparing itself to change, not that he wanted it to. Nagisa would take the nausea forever, rather than well and truly presenting as an omega.

He didn’t feel like an omega, or at least, how he assumed omegas were supposed to be. Though Nagisa didn’t like fighting, and would only resort to it in self-defence, he certainly wasn’t _submissive_ on an instinctual level. It was true that omegas were less common than betas anyway, but the few Nagisa had met had been concerned with little else than domestic chores and their alphas. He was still young, but Nagisa knew that whoever he was, it wouldn’t be _that_.

His victory against Takoaka proved that. The exhilaration of bloodlust and defeating his enemy was near deafening, and for a moment he forgot all about the nausea and discomfort. The other members of 3E had gradually left following the fight, leaving only Nagisa and Isogai behind. Truthfully Nagisa didn’t know why Isogai was actually hanging around, probably something to do with being the class representative…

“Nagisa kun!” His voice snapped out. “You look faint.”

Nagisa blinked, vision a little blurry. “I-I’m okay, thank-“ Before he could finish, he doubled over, vomiting what little food he’d been able to stomach directly into the flower bed.

“You should go to a doctor.” Isogai’s voice was gentle, but it had an edge of steel underneath it. Thankfully, as Nagisa’s presentation hadn’t actually happened yet, he wasn’t compelled by an alpha’s command.

“I’m okay,” Nagisa attempted to reassure him, voice croaky from the way his throat burned after the acid.

Unfortunately for him, it had also been Isogai who caught him throwing up the day before. Kayano had been eating fermented soy beans, and although Nagisa had never considered himself to have strong feelings about them, the mere thought of them had sent him hurling. He’d accidentally bumped into Isogai on his way to the one toilet that was actually in the class building to do said throwing up. Though they weren’t particularly close friends, Isogai had shown the same concern then, until Nagisa insisted that he was fine.

Isogai chewed his lip. “Are you sure you don’t have some kind of bug?”

Before he could reply, Nagisa felt his lower body muscles weaken, and he practically flopped over. With Isogai’s concern, he’d stepped near enough to catch Nagisa before he fell to the ground. For a flying moment he thought that this was the moment his heat was doomed to arrive, which tempted him to use the last of his strength to push the alpha off him. However, he paused, shivering. It was summer, yet Nagisa felt cold all over, much too cold for _heat_. His breath drew short. What was happening to him?!

“Nagisa kun,” Isogai said steadily, “I’m going to take you to a hospital, okay?”

“No hospital,” Nagisa tried to protest, his voice small.

Isogai lowered him slowly, finding a more convenient position to lift him onto his back. “School’s over already, you can’t just go to the infirmary.”

He was just so tired, so faint, that he didn’t have the arguments left in him. Still, he couldn’t help but feel incredibly guilty that his stupid body was making Isogai carry him the whole way down the mountain, and possibly significantly further than that. During the long trek, it was almost as if Nagisa was dropping in and out of existence. He still kind of felt on the edge of hurling, but truthfully he suspected there was nothing left.

If it did turn out to just be his presentation, Nagisa really hoped that Isogai wasn’t planning on sticking around after he got dropped off, because he wouldn’t be able to take the humiliation. Even if he was confirmed to be an omega, he refused to be a weak and useless one. He didn’t know what he’d do, but it definitely wouldn’t involve nearly passing out. The thoughts kept him conscious at least, if not entirely lucid, until they’d made it to the main grounds of the school.  He was thankful at least that there weren’t that many people around.

If they were being stared at once they’d left the property, Nagisa didn’t really notice. All he wanted to do was sleep, but the least he could do was keep his body from becoming dead weight. Isogai kept his mind busy, repeatedly asking if he was alright. He really was way too good a person for his own good, Nagisa thought, enviousness of Isogai’s natural selflessness.

“Karma kun!”

Nagisa snapped out of his daze, suddenly more than alert of his friend. Karma being Karma, he’d skipped Takoaka’s extra training. He wasn’t sure why Karma was just hanging around close to their school, though he hoped it was assassination related rather than general mischief. Gently, Isogai slid him off his back, though he still supported most of Nagisa’s weight, holding him upright.

Karma scanned him over. “What happened to him?”

Whilst Isogai explained, Nagisa simply hung there, limp. When he got to the part about Nagisa throwing up, Karma’s demeanour appeared to shift, like he’d gone from nonchalance to hanging on to every word. If Nagisa had been feeling a little better, he’d have felt more fuzzy that Karma actually seemed to be concerned about him. It was a reminder that they were actually friends, now. His stomach twisted at that thought, forcing him to remember why he’d been avoiding Karma for the last two months.

That train of thought would only serve to make his illness worse, so Nagisa forced it down, attempting to steady himself. The moment he tried to shift so he was holding his own weight, he almost instantly stumbled again.

“I’m taking him to the hospital,” Isogai finished. “Want to help carry?”

“I don’t need an e-escort,” Nagisa got out.

_Karma shrugged, taking Nagisa’s arm over his shoulder to help support his weight. “Sure.”_

Feeling like the victim of some disaster, Nagisa gave up and allowed the two alphas to carry him down the street. Thankfully, there was a hospital not so far from there. It had been a while since he’d been admitted to an actual hospital, his mum much preferring to keep him inside. Due to the heat, the waiting room was filled with patients. Everything felt simultaneously sickly and sterile at the same time.

Like some kind of parasitic leech, Nagisa clung onto Karma whilst Isogai talked to the receptionist. Although he didn’t want to think too hard about what he looked like, he felt inexplicably comfortable, protected. Maybe it was something to do with his newfound omega nature, being pressed against an alpha in that way. If he didn’t feel so woozy, he would’ve sworn that Karma was intentionally releasing a few pheromones to calm him down. Nagisa’s nose shifted as if by instinct, trying to get closer to the scent glands on Karma’s neck to inhale it deeper. For all that Karma was, Nagisa had never expected him to feel so steady.

“Nagisa kun,” Isogai cleared his throat, causing Nagisa to stumble back. “They’re going to take you to a doctor now.”

“O-oh,” Nagisa turned around properly, still supported by Karma’s arms, to see a wheelchair that had been brought out for him. Though he understood its necessity, he couldn’t help but cringe. That lonely, kind of overused, wheelchair summed up the entire day.

Still, he was relieved to actually sit down, exhaustion catching up at a terrifying pace. Isogai and Karma were left in the waiting room as some nurse wheeled him towards some kind of consultation room. Everything was so surreal that Nagisa barely paid attention to where he was going, only that soon the nurse was gone, and he was face to face with a fairly young looking doctor.

Her smile was surprisingly bright, as she glanced between him and her computer screen. “Shiota Nagisa? Yes, I have your medical information here. I’m Doctor Kawahara, what can I help you with today?”

He almost sobbed. “I threw up pretty bad around an hour ago and collapsed.”

“Had you been feeling sick before this?”

Nagisa thought back. “I threw up yesterday too, and the day before that. But I’ve been feeling sick for a few weeks.”

She took his vitals briefly, before glancing back over at his desk. “I can confidently say that you’re sh _o_ wing signs of dehydration, which likely caused the collapse. Have you been making sure to take in fluids in this weather?”

His eyes fell to the floor. “I couldn’t keep them down.”

That caused Doctor Kawahara to look concerned. “It says here that you’re un-presented, correct?”

Ah, there it was. “I thought they were signs of heat.” He bit it out.

“A male omega, then? Have you been experiencing any other signs?”

“Mood swings,” he thought quickly. “Headaches, exhaustion… It’s been going on for around a month.”

“For a month?” She raised her eyebrows. “Okay, we’ll just give you an ultrasound to check on the development of your internal sex organs, and we’ll go from there.” Doctor Kawahara stood up then, moving around the room to pull out some kind of monitor. “Do you think you can get up on the bed?”

The medical bed looked like an impossible challenge, but Nagisa was feeling at least a little better out of the heat, and shakily managed to pull himself up. He lay down, pulling his shirt up as instructed as Doctor Kawahara spread surprisingly cold gel over his lower stomach. Frankly, he had no idea how presentation check-ups were supposed to go. She had a kind of calming presence though, and the anxiety of not knowing what was wrong with him was swiftly fading.

Nagisa had good senses, and he could tell there was a tension in the air that suggested something wasn’t quite right. She moved the scanner contraption back and forth over his abdomen, frantically clicking on the screen, zooming in and screen capturing a few images. He felt incredibly uneasy, like his illness was worse than just heat.

“I’m going to put my hand on your stomach, okay?”

He nodded shyly as she pressed tentatively on one area, before returning to the ultrasound machine.

“Shiota san,” she said gently, “are you sexually active?”

Nagisa supposed it was a routine question, but it still made him cringe. What did ‘sexually active’ even really mean, anyway?

“No,” he finally answered.

She took a deep breath. “Was there maybe a situation you don’t quite remember clearly, where you could have been drugged or otherwise unaware?”

Surely that had nothing to do with presentation?

“No,” Nagisa pressed again, ejecting a certain, shameful memory from his brain.

“It’s just,” she turned the screen clearly so he could see it. “This might sound crazy to you, but look here.” Doctor Kawahara pointed to a shape on the screen. “This here could be a head, and this the back, and,” she zoomed in further, “this looks like a tiny arm.”

“I-I’m sorry?” He felt bile rise up again.

Doctor Kawahara reached underneath the small monitor, producing a tube that looked ready made to hold pee. “I’m going to pull the curtain around you, and I want you to urinate into this okay?” She handed him a bottle of water like a peace offering.

Nagisa knew he was supposed to trust doctors. Once she’d left him alone, he forced himself to drink as much of the water as he could, and managed to at least pee a little bit. He wasn’t sure if it was enough, but then again he hadn’t experienced one of these appointments before. Once he’d signalled he was done, the doctor politely took the sample over to her desk, and swiftly dipped something into it.

“It will be just a few minutes,” she said reassuringly. “There,” she looked over at the stick. “Positive. I’d like to do some further tests just so we’re completely sure, but Shiota san, you’re pregnant.”

A chill rushed over his bones. “Huh?” It came out like a whisper.

“Somewhere between eight and nine weeks, judging by the size of the foetus,” she looked over at the screen again.

“F-foetus.”

She looked highly sympathetic. “I appreciate this must be some highly shocking news, Shiota san. Would you like me to give you a moment alone?”

Nagisa just about had it in him to nod.

* * *

 

“He really did that?” Karma pondered as Isogai recounted the fight he’d missed. “Didn’t think Nagisa had it in him.”

“Karasuma just looked over and picked him,” Isogai said, apparently still processing the events from earlier. “And Nagisa took him out like it was nothing.”

“Before getting sick?”

“Before getting sick,” Isogai confirmed.

Karma pursed his lips. Though Nagisa was what he considered to be a master at masking himself, it was odd that he’d suddenly get sick like that. He almost felt… worried about him. That made Karma wrinkle his nose, leaning back more casually in seat.

“Where is my son?!” A highly agitated woman burst through the waiting room, stalking over to reception like she wanted blood.

It took Karma a moment to place the woman as Nagisa’s mother, whom he’d only met two or three times before. Even back then, he’d always been wary of her, like her presence left some kind of invisible stench. It made sense that she was there, though. Considering they were all underage, it was expected she’d be called in.

The receptionist fumbled in terror with their clipboard, stammering out something Karma couldn’t quite catch.

“That’s not GOOD ENOUGH,” she truly rose her voice. “I get called at work to collect my supposedly pregnant omega son, and you can’t even-“

He felt his throat close up. Nagisa… pregnant? That couldn’t be right…

“Woah,” Isogai let out beside him. “I never would have-“

Karma stood up quickly, as if the ground had turned to quicksand, dizzy and suddenly dry throated.

“Karma kun, what’s-“

Before he could finish, he let his legs carry him out of the building on autopilot without looking back.


	2. Retreat Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Nagisa has to deal with his new reality, and an assassination plan is hatched.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a quick disclaimer that as this is an alternate canon story, a lot of the dialogue is directly from the original anime. This is purely a fan work for fun, and I do not claim to own those particular parts. Slight content warning for mention of abortion. Take Nagisa's thoughts with a pinch of salt, I have every respect for those who do make that choice, and this is in no way meant to demonise them.

“Don’t look at me like that,” Nagisa’s mother said, gripping the steering wheel like she was choking it. He was almost surprised she wasn’t doing the same to him.

Nagisa was out of tears, so he just kept his eyes down, praying the journey would be over soon. All he wanted to do was shut himself in his room and hide forever. Everything felt like a bad dream, like he could wake up in his bed, completely fine, at any moment. He was much too solid for it to be some nightmare situation tucked in the depths of his brain. That didn’t mean _it_ felt real, though. Considering his mother hadn’t let him say yes to a print of the ultrasound, there was no physical evidence of it.

“Nagisa.” Her tone was sharper than the blade Takaoka had given him. “Stop being so pathetic.”

He clenched his fist and kept quiet, staring out of the windows as buildings went by. It didn’t help when he started to recognise the structures closer to the apartment building. He hadn’t taken the anti-nausea tablets the doctor had given him, but he was sure the feeling of impending doom was making it much worse. His mother was silent when she finally pulled the car to stop, probably in an attempt not to make a scene for the neighbours.

The pretence was over the moment Nagisa closed the door behind him. Like the entire room had been doused in shadows. A shudder ran through him. This was worse than when he’d initially been transferred into class 3E, so much worse. She’d been angry back then, livid and disappointed in him. But with the way she was looking at Nagisa, it was almost as if he was dead in her eyes.

“First,” she said with a tone that could be mistaken for nonchalance, “you get transferred down a class. And now this?”

“I-I don’t-“

There was only ice in her eyes. “Call up the clinic right now, I want you to get rid of it as soon as possible.”

He felt frozen. It didn’t feel real yet, and now it would be gone? Perhaps that was easiest, and Nagisa could pretend none of this ever happened. The mere thought seemed to go against him on an instinctual level. He was certain that he had it in him to kill, but something so defenceless… Even if it felt hypothetical, he knew he couldn’t do it willingly. Not before he’d processed it.

“I can’t.” He said, way firmed than he felt.

Her fist clenched. “You’re fourteen years old, Nagisa. You’re still a child.”

Nagisa shook. “I can’t kill it.”

“How do you possibly think you can look after a _baby_?”

He didn’t know.

“You can’t f-force me.”

 She looked at him in disgust. “Get out of here. I don’t even want to look at your face. You won’t be welcome in this home until it’s gone.”

Honestly, he should have seen that coming a mile off. It wasn’t the first time she’d thrown him out, but he had a feeling that she definitely meant it. His legs carried him independently towards his bedroom, surprisingly cold despite the summer heat. He didn’t know how much to pack, so settled for just a couple of outfits, plus his school stuff, or anything else that was completely essential. By the time he emerged from his room, his mother was nowhere to be seen, and he was able to slip out silently, turning his back on his life.

 A few doors down, Nagisa stood for a moment to collect his thoughts, before knocking lightly. This was not an unfamiliar position to be in, stranded in the hallway with only a backpack’s worth of belongings. It had happened just a few months ago, when he was originally transferred. Though, a small chill ran through Nagisa’s bones, and he knew deep down this held a greater sense of permanency.

“Oh,” the elderly woman swung the door open. “Nagisa chan!”

Nagisa forced himself to smile and lightly bow politely. “Good evening, Hiranka san.”

She let her eyes rake over him, before sighing and stepping aside. “You’d better come in.”

He nodded once more out of politeness, and stepped inside the apartment. Whereas his own was mostly very clean and white, like something out of a catalogue most of the time, Hiranka san’s home immediately smelt of old dust from the collection of ornaments that covered every spare surface. Though he’d offered to clean more than a few times, the least he could do in return for somewhere to stay, she’d rejected him. Nagisa always wondered if she found the smell comforting or something, like an ancient book shop.

At least she didn’t ask why he was here, a tradition he much appreciated. Nagisa knew he wouldn’t be able to hide it for long, though. Oh god, was he going to get fat?! He made his way to the small, second room. Hiranka san had been his babysitter when he was younger, and the room was like a second home to him. Setting his bag down on the futon, he stepped quietly to the wall, stroking his finger tip against the rip in the paper he’d caused when he was seven.

Slowly, he drew his hand down again, and rested it against his stomach for the first time. It felt just as flat as usual, in fact, he was sure a large meal would have made it more swollen. Before his mother had made him leave the appointment, Doctor Kawahara had told them that the baby was around the size of a bean. That didn’t seem so scary…

Nagisa knew that he couldn’t get rid of it. It was ridiculous, but it was almost as if he felt a kind of flutter or warmth underneath his hand. Logically, that didn’t mean he’d actually have to _keep_ it, either. There were plenty of people out there who wanted a baby, much more than he did. It would just mean holding out for a few months, in which it would be bigger than bean sized and a thousand times more terrifying. It was some kind of plan, at least. Nagisa felt more comfortable with having a plan.

Eight or nine weeks, the doctor had said. She’d told him that he would have an appointment with an actual midwife, to confirm it officially. Alone in that dark bedroom, Nagisa knew he had to admit it to himself. There was only one night he didn’t really remember, a result of a hang out turned party that got out of control, and one person he’d woken up with in an incriminating enough position. With the haze of the alcohol that had been brought out, Nagisa had very limited memory of what had actually happened that night, but he’d silently prayed it hadn’t gone that far.  

He at least had the right to know. Cringing slightly, Nagisa pulled out his phone, opening up LINE.

>Hey

>Thanks for taking me to the hospital earlier

>Can we talk about something?

* * *

 

Under the sweltering sun, responsible for the heat wave that was plaguing Tokyo, Nagisa dragged his feet down the mountain. Even Ritsu didn’t seem to have any idea where Korosensei was taking them. All Nagisa wanted to do was nap, honestly. It had only been a few days, but now he knew the cause of his ‘mystery illness’, the symptoms hit him tenfold. At least the anti-nausea tablets had done absolute wonders. Nagisa no longer had the desire to throw up every five minutes.

“Hey, Nagisa kun.” Karma caught up from behind him.

It caused Nagisa to jump slightly, not prepared for Karma to suddenly want to talk to him. He hadn’t replied to Nagisa’s message, and honestly Nagisa didn’t know how to bring it up. Karma was already completely unpredictable, so he couldn’t see how dropping _that_ bombshell would go well at all. Making he should just bake it into a cake or something.

“I hear you really did a number the other day. I sure wish I could’ve seen that assassination of yours.”

There was a certain edge to the end of his tone, as if he’d wanted to say something else entirely. Being Karma of course, he recovered quickly, keeping his posture tall. Nagisa had doubts about his fight with Takaoka. Though he’d proven he could assassinate a human, Korosensei was an entirely new ball game. He wondered how well he’d be able to stab a knife with life growing rapidly beneath his skin.

Nagisa couldn’t help but beam under the praise, regardless. Another side effect of his condition – now that he _knew_ he was an omega, some sort of placebo effect had kicked his newfound instincts into overdrive. At least he wasn’t drooling over the scent of every alpha that came his way, but Karma’s approval made his legs a little wobbly.

“Alright, we’re here!” Korosensei finally announced, turning to face them. “Behold!” He pulled back the bushes they’d stopped in front of, revealing an expanse of water. “A pool I made specially for E Class!”

In the height of summer, the pool looked incredibly inviting. He could practically feel the ghost of the cool water against his skin, some much needed relief. Everybody cheered at the sight, stripping their clothes off rapidly. Nagisa almost did the same, yet his fingers stilled on the hem of his t shirt. He’d spent at least an hour tiptoeing up in front of a mirror to survey his stomach from every angle. There was no discernable bump, but he was frightened to reveal it, nonetheless. Swallowing in shame, Nagisa made his way over to the shade, where a few sun loungers had been set up.

“Nagisa kun?” Sugino looked over his shoulder. “Aren’t you coming?”

His eyes raked to the ground. “I’m still kind of sick, swimming can’t be good for it.”

At least he seemed to accept that with a shrug, not questioning it further. Nagisa wasn’t sure if he could deal with that right now. He settled down on the lounger, the other one taken up by Hazama, and instantly felt better to be off his feet. Though hopefully the sickness would be over soon without the need for pills, it would only make sense that the exhaustion got worse. He forced himself to keep his eyes open though, watching his classmates play around in the pool. Nagisa supposed he didn’t have the right to be a child anymore.

The mood shifted when Kurahashi attempted to splash Korosensei, causing a huge amount of alarm from their teacher. Karma decided to mess with him, rocking the lifeguard chair back and forth, threatening to push him into the water.

 “Karma kun! Stop it! I’ll fall in!” Korosensei continued to shriek, until he noticed the class stare at him with rapt attention. “Oh, I just don’t like swimming is all. It’s not like my tentacles get all swollen up so I can’t move or anything…”

Korosensei couldn’t swim! Nagisa instantly logged that in his mind. He’d been writing down all of Korosensei’s weaknesses, but finally they’d come across something truly useful. If they could get their teacher weak, he’d lose the incredible Mach 20 skill that made him so impossible to kill. When Nagisa returned to Hiranka san’s apartment, he immediately made for the notebook he’d been keeping, adding it to his previous list of weaknesses. He decided on highlighting it with a massive ring around it. This really could finally be something actually usable. Though Nagisa wasn’t good at coming up with plans for himself, the endless streak of possibilities.

Though nobody else had come up with anything either the next day, there was definitely a shift in the mood, a buzz under everybody’s skin that they might have some kind of chance. Korosensei didn’t seemed too phased by the reveal, acting like his normal self. Nagisa watched amongst the others as their teacher demonstrated his fake motorbike.

The moment was cut short, Terasaka slamming his way in. “What are you doing, Yoshida?” 

“Hey, Terasaka!” Yoshida replied. “The two of us were talking motorcycles the other day, since no one else here is into them.”

“Not only am I a grown up,” Korosensei explained, “I am also a capital M Man among men. I’ve been known to dabble in this kind of hobby. And this baby can hit 300 kilometres an hour. What I wouldn’t give to ride the real thing one day!” 

Yoshida pointed a finger. “You kidding? It’d be faster to just hold it and fly!”

Though amongst everyone else Nagisa laughed, something appeared to boil in Terasaka’s blood. He stepped forward and kicked the bike over sullenly, causing Korosensei to freak out.

“Geez Terasaka, what was that for?” Yoshida reprimanded.

“You apologise!” Nakamura joined in. “The not only am grown up, but also capital M Man among men Korosensei is _crying_.”

Terasaka didn’t seem to be phased by their complaints. “You guys are just buzzing like a bunch of bugs.” He reached behind him. “Time for an extermination!”

He tossed an aerosol can onto the floor, causing it to burst open and flood the room. Nagisa wasn’t directly close to it, but even from where he was stood it reeked of chemicals, swiftly flooding the room. He found himself spluttering as the air was poisoned by it, trying to keep it out of his lungs.

“Terasaka!” Korosensei raised his voice. “Pranks are pranks, but this is going too-“

Terasaka shrugged the tentacle off his shoulder. “Don’t touch me, monster. You’re beyond creepy – and so are all of you, getting pulled into being all buddy buddy with the monster!”

The atmosphere soured completely. Though Korosensei was technically their target, Nagisa like most his other classmates had grown to actually like him a lot. He’d witnessed it himself, Korosensei went above and beyond any other teacher he’d ever had in the past. Though they were still definitely trying to assassinate him, there was no hatred in any of their hearts.

Karma was leant casually against the wall. “Don’t get your panties in a twist. If you don’t like it, just kill him. I mean, that’s kind of what we’re here for.”

It was plainly a challenge, and Terasaka picked up on it. “You trying to start something? Fine by me! From day one you’ve been-“

He stepped forward, but before he could even lay a hand on Karma, he was grabbed firmly by the face. “Now now Terasaka, if you want to fight, actions must come before words.”

Nobody missed it when Teraska’s legs shook under the grip. Karma was an _alpha_ , a fact he was making obvious. Despite being shorter physically, it definitely felt as if Terasaka was below Karma’s foot, he himself only a (perhaps overcompensating) beta. With just a gaze, the high tilt of his chin, and the scent he casually released, Karma was easily able to display his dominance. It made Nagisa’s legs tremble, just a little.

Humiliated, Terasaka slapped his hand away. “Let me go! Bunch of losers.”

He stormed off, but the atmosphere dragged behind him. Terasaka’s anger issues were the least of Nagisa’s worries, though the tension didn’t make anything easier. Karma had raised quite a good point, one that Nagisa himself had been thinking. They had the means to kill Korosensei, so why not come up with a plan?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope everyone enjoyed :3 I hope the next upload will be speedier, but please keep in mind I work a full time job.


	3. Command Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Following Terasaka's instruction, Class 3E attempt to assassinate Korosensei

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You may or may not hate Karma after this one...

Even the next day of school, when Terasaka burst into class uncharacteristically late even for him, there was still a cloud around him that said something was wrong. With Korosensei’s sinuses problem, leaking whatever fluid that Nagisa _really_ didn’t want to think about too hard, the day was already far from typical. He set his chopsticks down, the weird canary coloured phlegm stuff having put him off anyway.

“Oh! Terasaka!” Korosensei rushed to the doorway. “I was worried you wouldn’t come in today!”

Teraska didn’t make a huge show of his touch though, wiping off some of the fluid. “Hey, octopus… It’s time we killed you for real. Come to the pool after class. After all, water’s your weakness.” He looked around the room. “You all come help! I’ll knock him smack into the water for you!”

Whilst an assassination plan was what the class really needed, there was still an air of unease. Nobody had really known where to start with Korosensei’s weakness, so by all means it should have felt like a godsend that somebody was coming up with an idea. But on the other hand, certainly in Nagisa’s eyes, Terasaka hadn’t done much to earn their trust. With that fact, and the aggression from the day before, his bloodlust wasn’t stirred.

Maehara stood up. “You haven’t helped with anybody else’s assassination, Terasaka. And now, when it’s convenient for you, you’re ordering us around... You really think anyone’s going to jump at the opportunity to help you?”

Terasaka didn’t seem fazed. “Like I give a damn either way. Hell, I’d be happy to have the ten billion yen prize all to myself.” He stormed away, yet again.

“Well, I’m not going,” Kurahashi announced very loudly.

“Oh,” Korosensei said confidently, “let’s _all_ go!” As the words left him, the weird fluid began to harden and spill even more rapidly over the wooden floor, kind of like quicksand. “Here Terasaka is ready to assassinate me. This is the perfect chance for everyone to kill and make up!” 

Whilst the others stayed in the classroom, trying to clean up the snot as Korosensei rallied them up, Nagisa found himself slipping away. There was something about the way Terasaka was suddenly acting that just didn’t _feel_ right. Whilst Nagisa knew he wasn’t particularly bothered about Terasaka’s personal issues, he still had this deep kind of urge to get to the bottom of it. Maehara had been right, Terasaka had never shown much of an interest in the assassination before. He hadn’t walked far by the time Nagisa caught up, just behind the class building.

“Terasaka kun!” He called out. “Are you really going to kill him?”

He turned, and kept his voice flat. “Well, geez, Nagisa. Of course I am.”

Nagisa swallowed. “Well maybe you should tell everyone your plan of action.”

It appeared that his mistrust wasn’t badly placed, because Terasaka stepped into his space, yanking Nagisa up by his shirt collar. “Aw, shut it! You weaklings, always cowering together! It isn’t like you’ve got a vision of _really_ killing him!” He shoved him back, though not hard enough for it to hurt. “But I’m not like the rest of you. I’ve got a vision for killing him, alright. Easy as pie!”

As he walked off, Terasaka seemed confident enough in his plan, but not in himself. There was something going on there, something below the surface. Even his words sounded like someone else’s. It was unsettling, and Nagisa had no confidence in trusting him. But Nagisa didn’t want to go without seeing it through, either. Although Terasaka’s plans had nearly ended in Nagisa getting injured once before…

“You’re not going, Nagisa kun.”

A chill ran through his bones, as Nagisa turned to face the owner of the all too familiar voice. “W-what do you mean?”

Suddenly, Nagisa’s throat was tight under the commanding presence. Karma didn’t lay a hand on him, but Nagisa still found himself backed up against the class building under the mental strain of it, meeting the taller boy’s challenging eyes. Finally, Karma really did touch him, holding his shoulder firmly still. It was only the two of them, the rest of their class completely unaware, which only served to make Nagisa feel more under threat.

“You have no idea what kind of plan Terasaka’s cooking up. It might be too dangerous for you,” he swallowed, eyes raking down to his stomach, “when you’re like _that_.”

So Karma had figured _it_ out, then. Nagisa wasn’t exactly surprised, and he knew that they did need to talk about it, but there was something toxic surrounding him. He didn’t know how he’d found out, presumably the hospital trip? Or had his scent changed that much already, something he’d heard of happening to omegas in pregnancy? Whatever it was, Nagisa hated that he’d chosen _right then_ to complain about his condition. The more he thought about it, the madder he got. Karma was his friend, but he didn’t have the right to tell him what to _do_.  

Nagisa snapped his head around, struggling against the hold. “Let go of me.”

“No,” he said darkly, gripping harder.

“I said let go!”

Karma took a hold of his cheek, forcing Nagisa to look him in the eye. “Oh? So he _can_ speak.”

He was truly seething with rage. With both of Karma’s hands occupied, Nagisa figured the best option of escape would be to kick him, hard. It would probably shock him enough to loosen his hold enough so that Nagisa could get out, but that was wishful thinking.

Sensing the gears ticking in Nagisa’s mind, Karma let go of his shoulder, though moved to tilt his chin up, forcing him into direct eye contact. The toxic feeling surrounded Nagisa, getting progressively stronger until it flooded all of his senses. Blurring around him, the real world seemed to desaturate, and all that was left were Karma’s gleaming mercury eyes, piercing right into his mind. The ground seemed to cave in below his feet.

As soon as the fear had reached his heart, freezing him in place, another feeling began to churn. Something primal just _clicked_ , and Nagisa woke up. His alpha was here, staring at him. All Nagisa had any desire to do was to please his alpha, to do exactly as he wanted. With his legs shaking, he lowered himself to his knees, never breaking the connection of the eye contact. He straightened his posture as best he could, and tilted his neck, displaying his untouched scent glands.

“I have to protect you,” Karma finally said, confidently. “So you have to stay right here, out of the way of danger.”

Nagisa nodded eagerly, though there was enough of him still in there to hate every second of it, to try and strain against his alpha’s will. He was just so dizzy.

Karma took a couple of steps, breaking off the intense stare, though the toxic feeling still remained. “O-okay, good. I’ll be in the forest.”

He walked off quick enough to not catch Nagisa’s desperate gasp as he caught his breath again, and the sobs that spilled out as he collapsed onto the ground. Sickeningly, he was clouded by the urge to remain in that exact spot, to wait patiently until his next order. It wasn’t even that he was scared of what might happen if he moved, he just… couldn’t find the will to. It was as if his body was completely ignoring his brain.

Nagisa strained again after a while, desperate to prove at least _something_ to himself. Finally, though it felt like swimming through a tub of super glue, he managed to crawl just a little to the side. With every small movement he made, the struggle seemed to get less and less. By the time Nagisa had managed to pull himself to his feet, taking small steps away from the clearing where their class building lay, the compulsion had mostly physically worn off, but that didn’t stop how fundamentally ill it made him feel to disobey his alpha’s command.

A few minutes into his walk, as Nagisa approached the site of the pool, the ground shook with the sound of an explosion, followed by the screams of his classmates. Either something had gone horrifically wrong, or Nagisa’s intuition had been right. He picked up pace, breaking into a run to reach the outdoor pool. 

When he reached it, the pool was devoid of any water, or people. The ground was covered with debris, which Nagisa realised was from the now missing dam that Korosensei had built. Terasaka and Karma were standing there, clearly arguing about something, with the way Terasaka was attempting to loom over Karma.

“-not my fault! Blame the guy who made me go through with it! _He’s_ the guy that got everyone swept away!”

Without hesitation, Karma stepped forward, expertly levelling out his weight as he threw a hard punch towards Terasaka’s jaw. From the sound of the contact alone, Nagisa could tell it was a _hard_ hit. Despite the difference in physique, the force of it was enough to throw Terasaka off his feet, leaving him rather pathetically sprawled on the ground. Now that his sense of scent was improving, Nagisa truly saw the difference between a beta and an alpha. Though betas were mostly unaffected by pheromones, the sheer amount of steel and dominance in Karma’s gaze was enough to keep Terasaka firmly on the floor.

Something uncomfortable churned in Nagisa’s lower stomach, similar to the feeling he’d experienced when Karma stared him down. His throat went dry, and his vision blurred at the edges slightly. It was sickening, but he swelled at the sight of it. He’d never approved of Karma’s more violent mannerisms, but something just stirred within him, now it wasn’t turned against him. Nagisa was drawn to the pheromones, just about ready to fall to his knees again. He was giving off this scent like he was the strongest person to exist, an ideal protector… Nagisa hated it.

“They didn’t get swept away,” Karma said, his tone flat. “You did. If you’ve got time to go pointing fingers, try using it to figure out what you want to do here.”

His voice was so steady…

“Nagisa kun?” He addressed, snapping Nagisa back to reality. “Are you coming?”

Nagisa hesitated, but nodded. As he did so, whatever Karma had managed to do to him broke away. Finally, he felt unshackled, clearer. He turned, and followed Karma down the flow of the river to where the action was happening. By the time they got there, their friends were safe, watching Korosensei fight Itona at the bottom of the waterfall the river now lead to. Of course it had been a sadistic plan out of Terasaka’s control.

“Is this for real?” Okajima said, dazed as the rest of them.

Kataoka looked over at them. “That’s not much water. Is he really that powerless?”

“It isn’t just the water.” Terasaka finally caught up with them, as if his confidence hadn’t just been totally humiliated. 

“Terasaka.” Isogai practically growled.

Terasaka ignored the threat. “He can’t go all out because he just got finished saving you all. See? Look above him there.” 

Following his eyes, Nagisa realised that Muramatsu, Yoshida, and Hara were all still trapped against the cliff. Korosensei had no opportunity to save him, as Itona was putting his full strength into the fight. Amongst the others, he let out a sound of horror. They needed to save them, if it was impossible for Korosensei to do himself.

Isogai didn’t let it go. “Wait a second… don’t tell me _they_ roped you into doing all this!”

“That’s right.” He sounded almost proud. “Shortsighted guys with no vision and no goals are doomed to be played by smart guys like them…” Something in his composure seemed to change suddenly. “But you know… at least let me choose who’s pulling the strings. I’ve had it up to here with those jokers, and I sure don’t like the idea of them walking off with the prize. So, Karma,” he turned, “why don’t _you_ try controlling me?”

“Huh?” Karma looked him over. He may not be on his knees and tilting his neck as Nagisa had been compelled to earlier, but it was unmistakably a sign of submission.

“Give me a strategy out of that shrewd mind of yours! I’ll put it off perfectly and save all of them!”

The alpha let it seem like he’d been expecting it. “Sure, but can you even handle one of my plans?” He reached over, ripping Terasaka’s shirt open. “You might die.”

Terasaka was only fired up by that. “Oh, I’ll do it alright. I’m the perpetrator who gets results.”

Karma beamed. “Okay.” He leaned over, then, spelling out whatever plan he’d swiftly come up with lowly into Terasaka’s ear. Although Nagisa knew that Karma’s plans were always well built in logic, they were _always_ dangerous. He didn’t think Karma was joking when he’d stated Terasaka could die.

Simply nodding, though, Terasaka made his way swiftly down the cliff, jumping into the water. Though they couldn’t hear exactly what he was saying from their position, the action became quite clear. He stripped off his shirt, standing directly in Itona’s path, like he was tempting a wild bull in a ring or something. Waves of dread set over Nagisa.

He couldn’t help but step forward. “Karma kun-“

Karma didn’t rip his eyes away. “It’s alright. Shiro’s not out to kill us students. And it’s precisely because we’re alive that Korosensei’s attention is divided. Even Hara san; she might look like she’s in a pinch, but Itona’s attacks won’t be aimed at her. It’s like I told Terasaka: he’ll hit you with a tentacle hard enough to knock you out, but you take that speed and power like your life depended on it.”

Like some kind of fortune teller, Itona whipped out one of his tentacles, but Terasaka was ready for it, wrapping the appendage in his discarded shirt as he was shoved backwards in the water.

“Teraska’s still wearing yesterday’s shirt,” Karma continued calmly. “Which means it got a direct hit at point blank range from whatever was in that weird spray. That’s sure to have an effect on Itona. So, having made a chink in his defences, the octopus…” he paused, as Korosensei quickly flew up the cliff in the confusion “…can rescue Hara san. His weak points are the same as Korosensei’s, right? So all we have to do is use his same tricks right back on him.”

With everyone catching on, they leapt into the water and began splashing Itona’s tentacles with water. Nagisa was tempted to join them, but then Karma gave him another shot of that moody glare, forcing him to hold back the whimper that built in his throat. Nagisa’s feet were glued to the grass again, even as Karma leapt down onto a rock.

“You’ve absorbed a lot, I see,” he addressed loudly. “Your advantage is dwindling.”

Nagisa couldn’t hear the rest as he spoke lower, but it was obvious that Itona had lost as the others surrounded him, ready to douse him in more water. Swiftly, Itona and Shiro surrendered, wandering off together in the opposite direction. Though he hadn’t been allowed to _do_ anything, Nagisa felt the high of victory rush through him.

When Karma was dragged down from the rock by Terasaka, and then attacked with water by the others, Nagisa couldn’t help but see a completely different, careless person. He didn’t know what he’d been thinking, letting Karma threaten his brain with his power like that. The shroud was gone from his eyes. Karma was not _his_ alpha. He might be, Nagisa’s insides churned as he thought of it, _the father of whatever was growing inside him_ , but that didn’t give him an automatic claim. It had been a while since they had classes on secondary gender dynamics, but Nagisa knew that the only way Karma had any rights over him would be if they’d actually bonded.

He turned away from the post-crisis fun, deciding to grab his things and make a trip to the public library before returning to Hiranka san’s apartment. Nagisa would never let Karma, or any other alpha for that matter, take control of him like that again. If he was doomed to be an omega, he was going to learn as much as he could to fight against any part of it that made him _weak_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! All your comments mean the world to me! If anyone has any questions about my ABO universe, don't hesitate to ask.


	4. Bet Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Studying for finals commences, and the E Class have a run in with the Five Virtuosos in the library.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quick reminder again that I do not claim to own Assassination Classroom, and due to the placement of this fic, some lines of dialogue are directly taken from the original.

With all of the drama from the past week of his life, Nagisa had completely forgotten that finals were even coming up. And once he did remember, he didn’t know where to begin. In the tiny room Hiranka san had given him, every time he picked up a book its contents seemed to turn to soup on the page. The school system felt so chillingly small, with everything else crashing down around him. Like had been happening a lot recently, Nagisa slipped his hand against the skin of his stomach. For whatever reason, a spell of comfort washed over him whenever he did it.

Needing to distract himself, Nagisa pulled himself to his feet and came into the main room. The apartment was almost entirely open plan, so Hiranka san noticed him walk into the kitchen area, though she was watching some odd TV show. Hiranka san’s idea of adventurous cooking was plain rice. Although that had been very convenient for a few days, the simple diet easing his nausea, he was a little tired of it. Nagisa wasn’t particularly skilled at cooking, but it was the least he could do in return for a bed to sleep in.

Noodle salad was pretty simple to manage, anyway. He chopped the vegetables, soothed by the soft hum of background noise. Nagisa didn’t like pure silence much anymore, it lead to too many thoughts. He brought the knife down quicker, really hitting into the onion. Whilst he was sure Hiranka san wasn’t looking, he twisted it around in his hand, going through some of the basic positions Karasuma had taught them. It was weighted differently, being a kitchen knife, but it was still good practice.

“It’s time to eat,” Nagisa said eventually, serving the noodles.

“Mm, time to eat,” Hiranka san agreed. She at least didn’t seem to mind the different meals, which made Nagisa feel less like some kind of freeloader. He wasn’t a culinary genius or anything, but it did taste nice, warm and comforting. The plain rice had made him feel like even more of an invalid than he currently already was.

“How are your studies going?” Hiranka san asked when she was about half done with it.

Nagisa swallowed. “Okay, at the moment. I’m a little worried our teacher still wants me to score within the top fifty, though.” 

She smiled. “I’ve always thought you were very smart.”

Dropping her gaze, the gears in his head began to spin. He was certain he would do worse than at midterms, considering how hard he’d studied for those without whatever mental wall was blocking him. The doubt lingered on him that night, carrying through until the next day. Everybody at school was gearing up in exam preparation mode, settling themselves outside due to it being so hot in the class building. At least Korosensei’s speeding around for extreme studying help was providing a nice breeze.

“Korosensei,” Nagisa asked finally, “do you want us all to make top fifty this time, too?” 

“No,” he sped around, “I was too focused on your total scores for midterms. I’ve come to believe that each student should have a goal better suited to him or her. And that’s why I’ve come up with the perfect target for our assassination classroom.”

Nagisa nodded, trying to focus on the English word flashcards he was being shown.

Korosensei came to a stop in the middle of them for a moment. “Now then, as Shiro said, when I lose a tentacle, I also lose speed.” He demonstrated with a government issued gun, shooting off one of his own. “One fewer tentacle and there’s already a difference. See? I can’t keep up the quality of my clones, and now there’s a few child clones mixed in.”

Sure enough, skirmishing around them were a bunch of mini Korosenseis, playing around rather than helping them to study. Science was probably Nagisa’s weakest subject, but even if he understood it he didn’t really want to understand the logic behind why the clone reduction was happening.

“Lose one more,” he continued, “and you get more child clones with the parent clones fretting about how to make ends meet.”

That had taken a tragic turn. Nagisa found himself shifting uncomfortably.

“Lose yet another… and now the father clone has vanished, leaving the mother clone to raise the children on her own.”

Right then, Nagisa wished for some kind of noise to drown it out. He forced himself to turn away from the dramatic display. A dark thought every now and then was one thing, but watching his probable doom on fast-forward was too much for a sunny afternoon. Though deep down he knew he wouldn’t be able to avoid thinking about _it_ for too much longer. 

“Each tentacle lost is a ten percent reduction in movement. Here’s the deal: the students who get the best overall score and/or the best score in each subject will have the right to destroy one tentacle. This is the final exam for our assassination classroom. Can you get any closer to that ten billion yen prize? That, students, is up to you.”

Something burned within Nagisa’s chest. In Nagisa’s case, then, he should aim for top marks in English. He knew he was moderately good at it, but… the top mark out of everyone seemed almost impossible. But so did assassinating Korosensei. No, Nagisa didn’t want to collapse under the challenge, he was suddenly fired up. If he could get the top grade, and assassinate their target in the process, he was going to try his best.

The challenge seemed to resonate with everyone, as they returned to the class building before the day ended. Small groups gathered around the room, discussing strategies. Korosensei giving that kind of handicap… they had to take full advantage of it.

“One tentacle for each top score…” Nagisa thought aloud.

“Yeah!” Okuda said. “We can do this!”

Not in any group in particular, from his usual seat in the back of the classroom, Karma commented “when are you ever this fired up, Okuda san?”

Nagisa still hadn’t spoken to him, since the whole pool incident. Not that Karma had really tried himself, either. He knew it wasn’t anger he felt, but it was still something uncomfortable that had Nagisa shifting uncomfortably in his presence, averting his eyes whenever they accidentally made contact.

“Well, science is my one strong suit, I might finally be able to help everyone out!”

Kayano smiled. “We have our share of high scoring students here. Acing one subject each isn’t _that_ far-fetched.”  

Sugino’s phone started vibrating against the table. “Shindo?”

“Hey, what’s up?” He said into the phone. “Haven’t seen you since the tournament.” He paused for a moment, before laughing lightly. “Still condescending as ever.” His eyes then went wide, as he put the phone down on the desk, flicking it to speaker mode.

“-independent study session.” They hadn’t heard the start of it, but the rest of the class gathered round. “Their leaders are the pride Kunugigaoka, geniuses known as The Five Virtuosos.” Shindo put on a voice much like he was announcing the results of baseball. “Coming in at second place in midterms! The socially aware mass media hopeful who crushes the competition: Media Club President Araki Teppei! And in third place: dominator of competitions in the humanities, the perspicacious poet, and student council secretary Sakakibara Ren! In fifth place: the memorisation monster burning with a grudge against Akabane, Biology Club President Koyama Natsuhiko! And in sixth place: the man whose sharp tongue and LA-honed language skills are light years beyond the rest, meeting leader Seo Tomoya!”

“I-is that you doing these introductions?” Sugino questioned.

“Y-yeah, uh- I’ve always wanted to try my hand at announcing.” He took a deep breath, and resumed. “And reigning over all these from the very top, in first place, coming in first on the national mock exams, and with perfect scores in all subjects, the man with leadership in his genes: student council president Asano Gakushu!”

“The principal’s only son!”

“Asano with perfect scores in every subject, and the others with their specialisations make up The Five Virtuosos. They’re looking to keep you from returning to the main campus. If this keeps up…”

Sugino nodded. “Thanks for looking out for us, Shindo. But it’s alright, right now our goal isn’t to get out of the E Class. Still, to meet the goal we _do_ have, we will need to beat the A Class on points. Watch us, okay? We’ll put up a real fight!”

Shindo sighed. “Knock yourself out. The E Class’s fight isn’t my problem.”

With the conversation basically over, Sugino turned the speaker off again, giving Shindo a quick goodbye before hanging up. If anything, the news about the A Class fired everyone up more. Of course, Nagisa had been aware of the Five Virtuosos, their position made clear since first year. He still thought he at least had a shot, though, for the first time ever. He didn’t want to just get bad grades and accept it anymore.

…Except science, maybe. That battle could come another time.

By the time class filtered out, his brain was filled with nothing but assassination and victory. They just _had_ to pull this off.

“Nagisa! Kayano!” Isogai called out as they left the building.

“Isogai kun?” Yet another person Nagisa hadn’t spoken to since the whole situation developed.

“Want to study in the main campus library after class tomorrow? I reserved it way in advance with finals in mind. They always shunt the E Class aside till later, so this is practically a platinum ticket for us!”

Without thinking, Nagisa exclaimed “let’s do it!”

“I’m in!” Kayano joined the sentiment.

Well, at least that kind of setting would probably help him focus more. It had become a sad trend, really. Whenever Nagisa was left alone, he couldn’t escape the thought of his situation. He knew he’d have to deal with it, eventually. During the summer, at the very least. Almost two months’ worth of thinking. It would probably be physically unavoidable by then, though he didn’t really know. He didn’t know _anything._

Through the evening, the next day in class, and even the library, the words started to swim on the page. The longer he stared, the more ‘m’ and ‘w’ looked like exactly the same letter. English may be his favourite subject, but with the level of focus he was placing on it, the more he was getting annoyed with the grammar and confusing spellings.

“Well, if it isn’t the E Class crew!” The voice jolted him out of it, and Nagisa looked up to meet eyes with Araki Teppei. “This library is wasted on the likes of you. Pearls before swine, am I right?”

Unfortunately, that was nothing Nagisa wasn’t already used to.

Seo Tomoya joined in. “Move it, scrubs. Those are _our_ seats. Get lost!

“Hey!” Kayano stood up. “Don’t interrupt our studying!”

The cover of the text book slipped away as she moved, revealing a recipe for pudding instead. “Kayano,” Nagisa said, “your book…”

“These seats are ours,” Isogai said firmly. “We reserved them.”

“Yeah!” Nakamura sighed. “And being able to study in air conditioning like this is simply heavenly!”

Koyama Natsuhiko stepped up to goad them. “Have you forgotten? The bad grade E Class can’t defy the A Class – not at _this_ school.”

“W-we can too!” Surprisingly enough, it was Okuda who addressed him.

“What?” Koyama bent into her space.

“We’re aiming for the top finals scores in every subject! Let’s see you try and boss us around then!”

Koyama was clearly offended by that. “Don’t talk back to me, you cheeky bitch! And those glasses make you look like a hick! Right, Araki?”

 “Oh, uh huh.”

Sakakibara Ren, during Okuda’s confrontation, had managed to slip around them, much too close to Kanzaki has he held her hair in his hands, gripping her shoulder. “In all your criticism, you’ve overlooked something. See? Here we have a peal _among_ the swine.” He leaned in, making a disgusting show of breathing in her scent. “What a pity, you and I would make a magnificent pair… If only you had the academic chops. Perhaps you could be our servant.”

The display made Nagisa practically squirm in his seat, immediately thankful that he wasn’t really smelling of much yet. A few months ago, he would have thought the display an unfortunate example of how many omegas were treated. Now he knew for certain he was one too, it made Nagisa feel sick. Aside from himself, Kanzaki was the only other omega who had presented in their class, and likely would be the other one, considering it was a less common secondary gender. In Japan, suppressants weren’t available until age twenty, accept from a few extreme cases. And from his brief search online, Nagisa had found that scent blockers were _expensive_. Kanzaki had no choice but to display her sweet omega scent, and with the bonus of her looks, it was no wonder that she attracted the worst kind of alpha. How long until people noticed Nagisa, and he had to deal with the same thing?

“Uh, er… no.”  

Nagisa wanted to scream, as he felt Sakakibara’s (awful smelling) pheromones trickle out. He wanted to tell her how to ignore them, how to turn it around so he was the one trapped, rather than her. But Nagisa had never put it to practise before, forcing him to hesitate. He could see her tremble, attempting to resist the urge to submit to the alpha. It was the exact position Karma had held him in, and not only did it feel worse to see it played out again, but it _enraged_ him.

“Hang on…” Koyama said. “Aren’t these the same ones from midterms?”

“Hey!” Isogai directed at Sakakibara. “Cut it out already!” His own pheromones, much fresher, but laced with threat spilled out. It was enough to make Sakakibara still in his place, unused to dealing with much challenge, especially from another alpha in such a way.

“I get it!” Koyama announced. “So you’re not entirely without academic skill – in _one_ subject, anyway.”

Araki strolled towards them. “Then how about this? Whichever of our two classes snags the top spot over all five subjects gets to make the loser do anything they want.”

Nagisa jumped, as he felt a hand slap down on his shoulder. Instinctively he tried to wiggle away from Tomoya, but his grip was firm. “What’s wrong? Chicken? You’re all bark and no bite! We’re perfectly willing to put our lives on the line.”

He was close, too close. In one swift movement, a blur that Tomoya would barely be able to see, Nagisa had his pen at the boy’s throat, the nib only just digging into his skin. It wasn’t enough to hurt, but it was enough that the threat was more than clear. A quick glance showed Nagisa the others had done the same, stunning the Virtuosos. That’s right, they were assassins now.

“You probably shouldn’t be so quick to bet your lives,” Nagisa said.

“Alright, then!” Tomoya had backed off. “We have ourselves a deal!”

“We’ll make you do something _worse_ than death,” Koyama added, though without his earlier confidence.

Sakakibara joined them. “You can’t run!”

“You’ll regret this!” Akari joined them, and the four practically sprinted out of the library.

Yet another challenge, huh? After the commotion in the library had calmed down, Nagisa returned to his book, seeing the words clearly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, I thank you for all your notes and comments, they'e much appreciated <3 
> 
> (I promise a lot of this is set up, Karma and Nagisa will have a long conversation about all this... eventually :D)


	5. Exam Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Following their bet with the A Class, 3E take their end of term final exams.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Drama~

Rumours of their bet with the A Class spread around the school rapidly. The rest of 3E hadn’t been angry that just the few of them had made a bet that could affect them all, though. If anything it was just an extra layer of challenge. Even Tersaka seemed to be taking it seriously. If they failed to gain the handicap, they still had months left to assassinate Korosensei. There was, however, no way out if A Class got to make them do anything they liked. It was too risky, so a serious team effort was necessary.

“Come on Karma kun! Shape up and study well!” Korosensei yelled from the back of the classroom.

Ah yes, there was still that.

“You know you have a good chance of getting the overall best score!”

When Nagisa turned to look at him, he appeared to be sleeping underneath his maths text book. “I would anyway. Your teaching methods are top notch. But you know, Korosensei… the way you’ve been going on about top this and top that – you’re sounding like a regular teacher: crappy and boring.” It was enough to get Korosensei to stop. “Anyway, what’s the plan? You know the A Class goons have something up their sleeve.”

Okajima faced him. “Don’t sweat it, Karma. What more does the E Class even have to lose?”

“If we win,” Kurahashi stood up, “we can make them do anything! I’d like them to let us use the cafeteria!”

Korosensei laughed. “I have an idea about that. What if we make them hand _this_ over?” He sped to the front of the classroom, brandishing a copy of the school pamphlet. “You’ve already been at the bottom of the heap. That’s why I’d like you to experience a lively battle for the top. An assassin must aim for the top – and take it down.”

He really liked the sound of that. Not that Nagisa really felt like he was aiming to get back to the ‘top’ or regular class. Even in Class D, Nagisa had always been looking up from the bottom. The only difference now was that instead of having no goal, nothing at all to work towards, they had a collective target. Assassinate Korosensei, and destroy the A Class’ reputation. It didn’t seem impossible. With everyone working so hard together to reach that goal, it was almost as if it was just within their grasp. Well, everyone except Karma, it seemed.

Karma… He had no idea what was going on with Karma. His laziness wasn’t exactly unheard of, for sure, but if anything the chance at assassinating Korosensei was something Nagisa thought would motivate him. It was true that he hadn’t joined in on the pool plan, but Nagisa assumed that was more to do with his mistrust of Terasaka. For a moment, Nagisa worried that it could be something to do with him.

Maybe it was selfish, but Nagisa couldn’t bring himself to ask and find out. He didn’t _want_ to. There was no denying that he’d have to, eventually. But that day wasn’t here yet. He hadn’t been doing it consciously, but Nagisa begun to realise he was definitely avoiding Karma. Since the whole pool incident initially, but even more so following the bet with the A Class.

Even the next day, before their first exam started, Nagisa made sure to get there as early as possible. He wasn’t the first one there, in fact Nakamura joined him on the way in. It didn’t matter though, because Karma was bound to get there as late as possible, by which point Nagisa could keep his eyes firmly on his own desk. Which he did, once the rest of their class eventually filed in.

The thing about exams is that they can feel like a blur and like an eternity at the same time. By the time they were allowed to flip the papers over and start writing, Nagisa’s hand was writing the answers almost independently from the rest of his body. Answer after answer was just coming to him like they hadn’t before. The questions during the English test were nothing worse than he’d already practised. In fact, having been instructed to read the books in both Japanese and English, Nagisa found it pretty easy to imitate the original style.

They weren’t all that easy. In fact, Nagisa still felt himself get stuck on some of the same science questions that had always confused him so much. But for some reason it didn’t make him lose energy and give up. This is what they’d prepared for, even. Nagisa just gave it the best shot he could, and soon enough the two day exam period was over. After that, it was just a waiting game, until they were graded and revealed to the class.

“Well, class,” Korosensei placed the sealed results envelopes down on the desk, a few days later. “Your scores in all subjects have arrived.”

The tension was so thick even Karasuma wouldn’t have been able to slice through it. A few tallies were taking place around the room, ready to determine the results of the bet, but everyone else was on the edge of their seats. Nagisa found himself gripping his thumb desperately, his toes curling in anticipation for the results.

“Here goes. Starting with English: First in the E Class and first in the grade… Nakamura Rio!”

Although there was a slight drop in his stomach that he hadn’t come first, Nagisa couldn’t help but feel the taste of victory, and proud of Nakamura. When he turned his head, she looked confident beside him, as if she’d already known what the results would have been. Beating the A Class though… it felt very real suddenly.

“Take that!” She smirked, fanning herself.

“Perfect,” Korosensei said as she approached him at the front of the class to collect her results sheet. “Though your motivation had a whimsical side that worried me.”

“There’s ten billion at stake here! Don’t forget about the tentacle now, Korosensei.”

His face flashed red, as he always did when they were correct. “I won’t.”

“Nagisa kun,” Nagisa was thrown back slightly at the surprise force of Korosensei speeding around the room to put their results papers in their hands. “You put up a good fight, but you haven’t kicked your habit of making spelling mistakes when it really counts.”

Sixth. Nagisa had come sixth! It was the highest he’d ever scored in any subject during their time in junior high. He’d even managed to score a ninety one. That reality, despite not coming out on top, meant he couldn’t be disappointed. In fact, for the first time in a while, he felt proud of himself. Now he just needed to keep improving.

“Still,” Korosensei continued, “top marks in a subject means that’s one tentacle down.” He put a little flag on one of them, to symbolise it. “Let’s wait until I’ve read all the scores to see if we have something to celebrate. Next up is Japanese: First in the E Class… Kanzaki Yukiko! However! First in the grade goes to Asano Gakushu of the A Class!”

It was disappointing, but Kanzaki looked no less happy as she approached the front of the class to receive her results. It wasn’t over yet, the bet was still entirely winnable.

“Kanzaki san,” Korosensei said, “you did an excellent job. And that’s enough.”

“Asano can really nab those points,” Maehara complained, leaning on his desk.

“He’s crazy tough,” Mimura said, “Nakamura only beat him in English by a single point.”

Isogai sighed. “That’s the top in the nation for you. No chinks – not in any subject. They’re collectively known as The Five Virtuosos… but it really comes down to Asano. You’ve got to take him down or you’ll never get to the top.”

“Let’s move on,” Korosensei said. “In social studies, first in the E Class goes to Isogai Yuma kun. As for first in the grade? Congratulations! You beat Asano out to take the top spot!”

Standing up in joy, Isogai fist bumped. “Yes!”

Nagisa couldn’t blame him. Asano was clearly the one to beat, and doing that was a huge challenge. Not only did it mean they had two tentacles, but they only needed to score top in one more subject to win the bet against the A Class.

“An excellent job,” Korosensei continued, “especially considering all the fiendish questions you had to deal with!”

“We’re two to one!” Fuwa pointed to her chart excitedly.

“Next up is science…” Sugaya said. “Is it Okuda?”

“First in the E Class for science is Okuda Manami! And… Marvellous! First in the grade is _also_ Okuda Manami!”

She gasped, and Nagisa felt himself rise to his feet along with the rest of the class in celebration.

“That’s three to one!” Fuwa announced.

It meant that they’d won the bet against the A Class. They’d got the top score in the majority of the subjects, and thus put the A Class in their bet. Now, they could have whatever they wanted. They’d proven the impossible was actually possible.

“We don’t even have to hear how math turned out!” Maehara said, as Okuda received her results to applause. “The E Class won this! Great work Okuda! That tentacle is yours!”

Kimura pumped his fist. “And so is what we’re asking for in this little deal!”

“I can’t wait!” Kurahashi exclaimed.

“So that leaves maths,” Takebayashi said.

Korosensei went to reveal the final subject score. “First in the E Class for maths is Takebayashi Kotaro! However, first in the grade goes to Asano Gakushu of the A Class.”

It didn’t matter so much, considering they’d already won, but Nagisa was deeply surprised that Karma hadn’t once again secured the top spot. Back when they’d met, even in their first year, Karma had already been miles ahead, well onto high school level stuff. Nagisa had been sure back then, nobody was his match when it came to numbers. Although Takebayashi was intelligent, it was surprising for him to best Karma in his best subject.

Takebayashi looked shocked too, as he went up the front to collect his results.

“This,” Korosensei announced, “leaves Takebayashi and Kataoka san in joint first place in the E Class overall, and seventh in the whole grade. Congratulations!”

Seventh place? And first in the E Class? Karma had been _fourth_ overall, during midterms. How had he fallen so badly? Had he really not studied this time around at all, like Nagisa had worried? He turned around, in an attempt to gage Karma’s reaction, but he’d already managed to slip out without anyone else noticing, probably during the celebration. Nagisa swallowed. He was angry with him, but that didn’t stop him from hoping it was okay.

It was hard to judge Korosensei’s emotions sometimes, due to lack of facial expression. “A quick break is well deserved,” he said, and sped out of the classroom.

Pushing the emotions aside, Nagisa turned to Kayano, who was looking over at her papers.

“How did you do, Kayano chan?” Nagisa asked.

She beamed. “I’ve gone up so many places! I’m nearly in the top fifty this time!”

He was proud of her. Though she had studied and worked for it, it was great to see her, and everyone else come out so high. For the next few minutes, Nagisa turned to the rest of his friends, chatting about their results, during which time Karma managed to slip back in again, returning to the back of the class, until Isogai and Kataoka stepped to the front of the class, and got the rest of their attention.

“We’ve discussed it,” Isogai announced, “as class representatives, and we think that the prize we take from the A Class should be a class decision, as it was a team effort.”

“But,” Kataoka continued, “we also think we should use the opportunity to assist in our assassination. Korosensei is already handicapped, and we could increase that.”

Isogai nodded. “If anybody has any suggestions, please.”

Beside Nagisa, Nakamura leant back in her chair. “Korosensei’s biggest weakness is water, right, Nagisa?”

The class looked at him. Swallowing, Nagisa nodded, reaching for his notebook. “Yes, the water is the biggest weakness we’ve found so far. If even Shiro and Itona wanted to use it, it could be the most important overall.”

Sugino looked like he was thinking. “If we combined all his weaknesses with the handicap…”

“…We stand a real chance of assassinating Korosensei for real!” Kurahashi finished.

“So,” Isogai summarised, “we just have to force Korosensei somewhere with water.”

Terasaka stood up. Ever since the pool incident, he’d been keeping quiet, though Nagisa was pretty sure the rest of the class had already forgiven him. It had seemed like he was done in planning assassinations.

“We heard a couple of the A Class bragging about some trip,” he looked between Yoshia and Muramatsu. “I don’t know where it is, but-“

That was right! Every year, the top students always got to go on a domestic trip during the summer as a reward for getting the top grades. It was unquestionably the A Class’ prize, but now they could demand anything, it seemed well within their grasp.

Nakamura raised her eyebrows. “Isn’t that in the resort in Okinawa?”

Kataoka grinned from the front of the class. “An island surrounded by water, and three tentacles missing. If we work out the details of this, we stand our best chance yet!”

“Let’s have a vote!” Isogai said. “Hands up if you agree to request the domestic trip as our prize from the A Class?”

The vote was unanimous yes. They would iron out the plans later, but it was a real, true attempt that could actually work. If they piled their resources together, they truly could assassinate Korosensei. They could do this, win the prize, and prove themselves as worthy assassins. The plans vibrated through Nagisa, as his mind already began to turn, right back until Korosensei returned again.

“All right, class, you had a fine showing in the finals,” Korosensei said, “taking the top spot in three out of five subjects. Shall we get started with the assassination? The top three can choose any tentacle they like.”

Terasaka interrupted him, standing with Muramatsu, Hazama, and Yoshida at his side. “Woah there, Octopus! We got more than three in the top spot!”

“No,” Korosensei said, “there are three, Terasaka kun, over Japanese, English, social studies, and-“

“Huh?” He cut him off again. “Quit playing dumb! Five subjects, that’s Japanese, English, social studies, science, and home ec!”

“H-home ec?!”

“No one said _what_ subjects to ace,” he announced, throwing the tests on the desk, each with a perfect score.

Hazama chuckled lightly. “Nice that we _all_ had a hand in this scheme.”

“W-wait a second! Home ec is just-“

“Just _what_?” Karma finally said. He’d looked weirdly shaken when he’d returned, Nagisa noticed.  “Isn’t that a little rude, Korosensei? Why, home ec is the toughest subject of them all.”

Not just three tentacles, but seven! It would be the best chance of beating him they’d ever come close to. There was no way they were letting their teacher get away with not letting them take it, Nagisa smiled to himself, and begun to chant ‘seven!’ with the rest of the class. Korosensei may be planning to blow up the world, but Nagisa had learnt how important the class’ respect for him was.

“Seven?!”

Isogai stuck up his hand. “Oh, and Korosensei, we’ve been talking… We’ll use our prize from the A Class wager with this assassination.”

“What?”

They could truly do this. They _had_ to.

* * *

 

“Congratulations on retaining your individual top rank.”

Gakushu stood silently, his father not even turning to look at him.

“Or so I’d like to say, if it weren’t for a wager you’d made with the E Class.” Ah, there it was. “A wager that _you_ lost. The entire school knows all about your little bet. You’ll have a tough time refusing the E Class’ request now. So what will you do? Do you want the school to protect you?” He swivelled around on his chair, finally facing him.

Feeling every pound of the humiliation weigh down on him, Gakushu lowered his eyes. “No, thank you.” It was never a real offer.

His father stood. “I believe you said you’d put a collar on me and keep me as a pet, or attempt to expose my non-existent secrets. You certainly talk big for a whelp who can’t even win a bet with his peers.”

Gakushu clenched his teeth, body shaking as he tried not to react. It was what his father so clearly wanted, for him to yell and kick and try to fight back. No, Gakushu must stand still, like a statue, like the pawn his father so clearly wanted him to be.

He raised an eye brow. “How are you going to push the E Class back down again? Do you have any plan at all?”

 _Just stay steady_. “Their strongest is already cut down,” Gakushu bit out. “The rest of them will fall again.”

“Ah yes,” he sat back down again, leaning on the desk. “Akabane. You’re foolish if you think that’s taken care of.”

“But-“

The glare was chilling. “I observe all of my students. You should learn to better judge; those who will fall, and those who will rise back up when they’re knocked down. He may very well come after your top spot.”

Gakushu had no words, nothing to fight him off with. He just stood. Better to say nothing at all.

“You claim you don’t need help. Well, I will advise you then. Say, have you paid much attention to Shiota Nagisa lately?”

His brow furrowed. “Why would I care-“

On his feet instantly, his father pounded his fists hard against the desk. “And this is why you fail. Have I taught you so badly to completely ignore the enemy? Well.” His gaze darkened. “The boy is pregnant. Maybe not to an untrained nose, but the stench is all over him.”

That was crazy. Gakushu didn’t even want to know how that had come up. “ _What_? So you’re going to expel him?”

“Hmm,” he paced, “I could. I could also use it to my advantage, an example. You mustn’t be so quick to push away your opportunities. Akabane is young and impulsive, the kind of alpha who would likely be _distracted_ if, say, his omega was _taken away_ from him, especially by another alpha of equal or greater standing.”

“How-“

“Please. It’s as I said, the Shiota boy reeks of it.”

Gakushu swallowed. “Are you implying-“

His father waved him off. “You said you wanted no help, of course. Keep Akabane down however you like, as long as you get results. Do not disappointment me again.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Once again all your comments and kudos mean the world to me <3


	6. Ice Cream Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The school break finally starts, coinciding with Nagisa's birthday.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> An odd pairing.

A violent knocking. Tap tap tap. Tap tap tap. Tap tap tap. Nagisa just wanted it to stop, to lie in silence and stare up at the ceiling.

“Nagisa chan! You don’t want to be late for your last day of school!”

It wasn’t just the last day of school before the summer break. It was the twentieth of July. As of seventeen minutes past four that morning, Nagisa was fifteen years old. It didn’t feel like much of an achievement, though his whole situation was just a tiny bit less depressing. Not much, but a tiny bit. At least Hiranka san didn’t know the significance of the day, which meant no awkward singing or something.

He quickly dressed himself, rushing out the door as quickly as he politely could. Life went on, and they all had things to plan, teachers to assassinate… Nagisa had been dragging himself to school the last couple of months, but finally it felt like his energy was returning somewhat. With that train of thought, Nagisa realised he’d forgotten to take his anti-nausea tablets, in the rush of leaving. The fact that he wasn’t immediately doubled over and vomiting gave him some hope, like those symptoms were finally leaving.

At least because it was the last day, they met directly for the assembly in the main school building first, rather than having to climb the whole way up the mountain. As much as Nagisa hated all school assemblies… It was one of the things that he didn’t blame Karma for always skipping. These assemblies, aside from a tiny bit of actual information, were nothing more than an excuse for anti E Class propaganda.

“Aw yeah, here he comes,” Terasaka announced finally, as Asano and the Virtuosos made their way into the hall, “Mr Student Council President.”

Of course, the E Class were waiting for him. It wasn’t so much an ambush, but definitely a confrontation.

“What do you want?” Asano tried to push past. “I’m too busy with the ceremony to deal with the likes of the E Class.”

“Not so fast,” Terasaka put a hand on his shoulder. “Aren’t you forgetting something?”

The boy’s eyes widened as he noticed the class. As their representative, Isogai stepped forwards. “We had a bet, Asano, where the winner could make any one demand. We sent our demand via email. I trust you have no complaints?”

Terasaka walked around him. “Don’t even try pretending it was all just a joke! We could always throw home ec into those five subjects. ‘Course, we’d still win!”

And, oh, Asano’s facial expression was priceless. Like he’d chewed on a lemon, his face scrunched up for a moment, before neutralising. “You can have your trip.”

The rest of the students piled in, lining up in their designated spots. There was a slightly different mood present. The E Class weren’t just a bunch of nobodies to mostly ignore and jeer at. Not that there was any respect, either. If anything, the rest of the school hated their guts. It didn’t really matter, though it had been a bonus, all of Nagisa and the rest of the E Class’ energy was focused on their assassination.

The speaker, one of the teachers from the other classes, came to the microphone. “Now it may be the summer vacation, but don’t slack off. Er, uh… You don’t want to end up like the E Class…”

The same old drivel, the same old comments about 3E. For once, Nagisa had no regrets. If he hadn’t been transferred, he would have missed out on all of this. It was as Korosensei taught them, they stood with their heads held high for the remainder of the assembly. The group demonstration made the ridicule sound much more like it was, aimless words and propaganda. With the thought spurring them on, it was over in the blink of an eye.

“One for each of you,” Korosensei said when they made it back to the class building, colossal books (at least twice the size of the Kyoto trip ones) on each of their desks.

“Again with the over kill guidebooks!” Maehara complained, attempting to carry his.

“And even this isn’t enough!” Korosensei continued. “The temptations of summer are simply too many to mention. Now, then! We’re about to head into summer vacation, but you have a certain main event coming up.”

Nakamura brandished the pamphlet with the details of their island trip. “Yeah this – what we won in that wager!”

“It’s a privilege normally reserved for the class with the best grades – that is, the A Class. But this time, both the A and E classes dominated the top fifty. You more than qualify.” Korosensei beamed. “Summer vacation! The Kunugigaoka Junior High Special Summer Course: three days and two nights at an Okinawa resort!”

Along with the rest of the class, Nagisa found himself cheering.

Korosensei continued. “So what you’d rather do…”

“Yes,” Isogai said, “we’ll cash in our tentacle destroying rights during summer camp.”

“Seven tentacles is a big handicap. But don’t stop there! Come after me with raw hunger on this island… surrounded on all sides by water – my weakness! Let me be honest: You’ve become formidable students indeed. I’ve already given you report cards to show your parents. These are my report cards for you.”

In a blur, the classroom filled with sheets of paper, all detailing Korosensei’s highest score – a double circle. Everyone had passed their first term, and they’d done it well.

“In the first term you made full use of the basics you learned. This summer vacation, it’s time for plenty of fun, plenty of studying, and plenty of killing. Class 3E, Kunugigaoka Junior High: the assassination classroom! The first term full of fundamentals is hereby over!”

With that speech over, the summer break began. Nagisa had been invited to hang out with Sugino and some others to celebrate, but he’d turned it down. It may be his birthday, and the start of a long break, but he wasn’t in any kind of celebratory mood. He just wanted to go back, take a nap, and start on their summer break homework or something.

Nagisa hung around a little in fact, volunteering to help clean the classroom before eventually making his way down the mountain alone. At least it wasn’t as hot as it had been during the week long heat wave. He appreciated the silence, letting his mind wander to insignificant things. By the time he approached the main building, everyone else had already left.

“Hey, Shiota kun, aren’t you running a little late?”

He felt his body freeze up as he turned his head to see Asano jr leaning casually against the school building. Nagisa’s eyes darted around rapidly. They were very much alone, so Nagisa decided that whatever this was, it would be best to comply, for now.

Asano sauntered closer. “All your _friends_ came by much earlier.”

“I stayed behind to help clean up,” he told the truth.

“On your birthday?” Asano raised an eyebrow. Sensing Nagisa’s bones chill, he cleared his throat. “No need to panic, Shiota. I caught some of the E Class’ records out of the corner of my eye earlier in my father’s office.”

Nagisa shifted, though it was possible that seemed pretty farfetched. “Oh,” he said politely, “it’s not that big of a deal.”

“No?” Asano came closer, practically invading his air. “But you only turn fifteen once. So much for the undeniable bond between the E Class students.”

“Really,” Nagisa said, leaning away, “it’s not a problem.”

Asano smiled at him. Though by any other standards, it would have come off as charming and charismatic, it made Nagisa feel uncomfortable. It was so out of the ordinary, given how clear his hatred of the E Class had been earlier. There was something under the surface for sure, but why? He felt the unfortunate urge to find out.

“I insist.” His smile deepened. “You have that silly bet still. Say, some ice cream wouldn’t be too much of an extra stretch.”  

He wanted to buy Nagisa _ice cream_? “W-well-“

“Got somewhere better to be, Shiota?”

Nagisa really didn’t, unfortunately. There was no chance that Asano was being genuine, like he felt sorry for Nagisa and wanted to treat him out of the kindness of his heart. Similarly though, there was no real challenge in his tone or stance. Perhaps he was just covering it up exceptionally well, but there didn’t seem to be some kind of mental battle in play. With that, Nagisa concluded that he must _want_ something. But what?

Meeting his eyes, Nagisa returned his smile. “Okay then… Won’t it matter to be seen with a member of 3E?”

Pacing forwards, Asano shrugged. “Not where we’re going.”

After thinking about it for the last few seconds before he could change his mind, Nagisa followed him. Thankfully, Asano didn’t try to make much conversation. Nagisa didn’t attempt to question further, either, even when Asano pulled him onto the train. He just stared out of the window, at the town going past, gripping one of the overhead straps to keep himself upright.

The questions only started him when Asano took him into a tall building, directing him into the elevator as he pressed the buttons, and it moved upwards. Shortly after, the doors opened up to reveal a rooftop, absolutely covered in plant life. At a better glance, it was definitely some sort of roof garden, though nowhere Nagisa had ever been.

“I thought we were getting ice cream,” he said, after they stepped out.

“It’s over there, see?” Asano pointed to the far left side of the roof, where there was a slightly obscured counter.

It certainly looked a lot fancier than what Nagisa was used to. Most things generally were, but by the looks of it, he was out of his natural element. He took a deep breath, trying to recall some of the things Bitch Sensei had taught them. Funny how some things came in handy.

Nodding with confidence, Nagisa allowed Asano to lead him over. They had a pretty basic set up, with a clear counter displaying all the different flavoured scoops available. However, Nagisa noticed there was a much longer menu on the wall behind, which Asano appeared to be studying.

“Do you know what you want, Shiota kun?”

What flavour was the least likely to make him throw up? “Uhm…” he thought.

Asano waved him off. “Just go find somewhere to sit down. I’ll order.”

Not wanting to argue still, Nagisa found a free table. There were a few spread around the garden, far enough apart from each other that it didn’t really feel like a cafe or anything. They weren’t the only ones there, though on a summer's day it didn’t seem particularly busy, either. The whole feel of it was that of some kind of hushed secret kept between patrons, a hidden sanctuary.

Asano eventually found him, returning empty handed.

“They do table service?” Nagisa asked as Asano sat down. It took him all of two seconds to realise how impoverished that made him sound.

He shrugged. “With some of their menu, yes.”

Nagisa really should have thought this through, rather than agreeing on a whim. He wasn’t even sure he had enough money to pay for this. When he’d left home, he’d grabbed what little pocket change he had lying around, and he’d already blown through most of it in a few weeks. And it wasn’t like he had any way of getting more, considering the school’s policy on students having jobs.

He thought about it for a moment. Asano might be from the A Class, the biggest haters of the E Class, but aside from a somewhat snooty attitude, Asano himself had never really done much harm. Not directly, in the very least. He would still be guarded, highly, but there was no need to be impolite.

Smiling, Nagisa drew his gaze. “Thank you for taking me here.”

Asano shrugged. “It’s not so far out of the way. My father used to take me here whenever I achieved the best grades, up until a year or so ago.”

“But not today?” Nagisa found himself questioning. “You still got the number one spot.”

He sighed. “He still considers it a loss. Any success of the E Class that challenges his philosophies is, but especially when he considers it my fault… Anyway, Shiota kun-”

“You can use ‘Nagisa’,” he found himself saying, “I don’t really like using my family name, just in case it changes back again.”

“Okay then,” he said, face neutralising again, “Nagisa kun, the A Class will be getting our lead back. Once I find out your secret, of course. Say, you scored highly in English. You wouldn’t happen to know what’s behind the sudden boost, would you?”

Of course that was what he wanted. Nagisa took a deep breath in, and increased the spread of his smile.

“I don’t know what to say, Asano kun, I just studied extra hard.”

There was something behind his eyes that demonstrated how little Asano probably believed that, but Nagisa wasn’t so worried. It was the truth, at the end of the day. They’d had to sign a non-disclosure agreement for the government anyway, so it wasn’t like he could tell Asano about the extra motivation, even if he wanted to.

“Hmm,” he said, eventually, “I’m sure you’re all looking forward to that little trip.”

“It wasn’t too much to ask, was it?”

He sighed again. “Your class could have asked for much worse. Nobody from A really bothers with that, anyway.”

At that point, a smartly dressed waiter came out, carrying one of the most ridiculously intricate things to pass as ‘ice cream’ Nagisa had ever seen. It was intricate, an explosion of colour, like something on a tourism brochure. Definitely, he realised, out of his price range. There were even little candy sticks pocking out! It looked almost hilarious, next to the bowl of what appeared to be plain vanilla in front of Asano.

“What?” Asano said, noticing Nagisa’s look of horror. “You said you didn’t know what you wanted.”

Nagisa looked at the colossal plate. “T-this is too expensive,” he said, once the waiter had left.

Waving him off, Asano picked up his spoon. “It’s nothing. Call it a birthday gift. If you really must, it’s as I said, I’m sure your silly bet can stretch to a tiny bit of ice cream.”

Finally, Nagisa decided to pick one of the wafer pieces off. His eyes fluttered closed as soon as he put it in his mouth. Sugary sweetness danced on his taste buds, and soon the entire wafer had disappeared. Quickly, he started practically shovelling the ice cream into his mouth, moaning around each spoonful. After a very bland diet, and no sign of nausea, this was the best thing he’d tasted in weeks.

“Nagisa kun,” Asano said flatly, “slow down. You’ll make yourself sick.”

“Oh,” Nagisa licked the trail of vanilla that had rolled down his chin, and forced himself to put his spoon down for a second.

He sat up straighter. “Speaking of that bet. I have a proposition for you.”

“Proposition?”

Asano’s head tilted a little. “It has become clear to me that you will have nowhere to live soon.”

Nagisa didn’t quite follow that. “Huh?”

“Did you know,” he leant forward just a little bit. “That I happened to take a little tutoring opportunity, some elementary kids that happen to live in the same area as you. You’ve come and gone from a different address recently.”

Eyes darting around for the best escape route, Nagisa began to panic. “You’re following me.”

“Not quite,” Asano smiled casually. “I just observe. Presumably the family situation is due to the baby, but I did some digging. I’m not quite sure you’ll be able to rely on the kindness of others less knowledgeable for much longer, especially when it starts making itself more obvious, no?”

It was as if Nagisa’s body turned to stone. He was completely and utterly frozen in place, unable to even take a breath in. It wasn’t like he’d thought much about what he’d do when people found out, honestly he hadn’t thought about it much himself with everything else going on. With his signature smile, Asano was yanking everything to the surface. What was he going to _do?_

Finally he managed to take air in. “H-how-“

“Please, I can smell it on you,” he said nonchalantly. “Oh, don’t look at me like that, Nagisa kun. I’m better at honing my senses that other alphas, especially at our age. Besides, it’s like you’re carrying around a piece of Akabane’s scent. Every time I so much as glance in his direction that garbage _scent_ makes me want to hurl.”

“You want to throw up every time you look at me?” Nagisa got out.

“Only if I concentrate hard enough.”

Nagisa picked up his spoon again in a tight grip, a little confused by what Asano meant by any of that.

“Anyway,” he continued, “let me spell it out for you. I have a big house, plenty of spare rooms, and a father who spends most of his life in the school office. All you have to do is ask.”

There was no way he could properly process that. Had Asano, of all people, seriously offered him a place to stay? Before that day, they’d never even spoken a word to each other. Asano seriously wanted something, but Nagisa had no idea what he could possibly have to offer.

“I couldn’t.”

His face flat lined a little. “Nagisa kun,” he emphasised again, “how do think that elderly woman of yours is going to react when she finds out she’s hosting a mateless, underage, pregnant omega? In fact, I could give you clear evidence of her aversion to it. You wouldn’t want to bring shame on her good name, would you?”

They weren’t touching, but Asano may as well have a hand around Nagisa’s throat. It was true, though. He couldn’t rely on pure kindness forever, especially if it would end up harming her. It had already gone too far. Now Nagisa really thought about it, what other choice did he even have?

“ _Why_?” He barely whispered. “What’s in it for you?”

Asano leant forwards again. “I want all your secrets, of course. Keeping a close eye on you is beneficial to me. Just say the word.”

Nagisa swallowed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, I appreciate your comments and kudos! 
> 
> (Just as an aside, Asano is bullshitting a lot of what he's saying. He's trying to find an excuse as to why he knows where Nagisa lives, or anything about his situation, that's better than just 'my father told me')


	7. Scan Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Having accepted Asano's offer, Nagisa arrives at his home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You wanted more pregnant content, I delivered

Asano’s home was, compared to anywhere Nagisa had ever lived, practically a mansion. He found himself staring at the outside of it, checking his phone once again to make sure he’d got the right address.

“Nagisa kun, I have another gift for you.”

Nagisa jumped at the voice behind him, whipping his head around to find that Asano was somehow there. He really needed to improve on his special awareness and reflexes. Karasuma had given them all homework for the summer, to think of some of their physical weaknesses and continue to train them out – so long as it wasn’t anything too dangerous without supervision.

“A gift?” He asked, nervous at the thought of it.

Like some kind of dealer, Asano pulled an aerosol can out of his jacket. “Scent blocker.”

Looking at the can suspiciously, Nagisa swallowed. It was illegal for omegas to use suppressants under the age of twenty, but scent blockers were as common as regular deodorant. He didn’t know exactly how it worked, but it was definitely the most typical method omegas used to avoid attention, if they wanted. Nagisa wasn’t so sure he was producing much of a scent yet himself, though it must have been enough for Asano to suss him out.

“My father practically lives in that school office,” Asano said when Nagisa was still silent, “but he’ll easily notice pregnant omega scent, when he ever does come home.”

It was a fair enough trade off. Asano had never actually demanded Nagisa tell him any of his secrets from 3E, claiming he’d be able to figure them out. Nagisa was happy to give up the scent he couldn’t even really tell he had. He took the can, shook it slightly, and sprayed it over the glands on his neck and wrists like he would with cologne. In lieu of taking his trousers off to focus on the ones on his thighs, Nagisa gave himself a quicker spray all over.

“Is that okay?” He asked, slightly tentatively.

“May I?” Asano replied, looking at his wrists. Nagisa nodded his consent, and Asano lifted his arm straight up to his nose, pressing close to his scent gland. He inhaled deeply, before nodding. “Just like a beta.”

Nagisa couldn’t help but beam to himself about that. A beta was all he’d ever wanted to be. Maybe, he thought, after he had the baby, he could use some of this blocker and his existence wouldn’t be much different after all. It quelled the dread somewhat. Of course, he would have to accept it one day. But one day could come later, much later.

Pushing all of that aside, he followed Asano inside his house. The alpha pointed out the back entrance, which Nagisa was to use exclusively, and the back staircase to the upper floor. Nagisa hadn’t even been in that many homes with one staircase, let alone one with multiples. Of course he’d taken off his shoes, carrying them in his hand, but he still felt hyper conscious that he could be leaving some sort of mess. The entire place was _pristine._ It also seemed pretty western, from the layout and design of the doors.

“This can be your room,” Asano said, having climbed the stairs and taken a few steps down the hallway. “I don’t think my father’s taken a step inside since he bought the house.”

Tentatively, Nagisa placed his hand on the handle, and pushed it open. It was bigger than _his_ room was. And it was only used as a spare? There were no decorations, of course. It was more like someone had made a checklist of all the items that belonged in a bedroom, and blindly ordered them all in shades of white and beige. It was more than he could have dreamt of, and in that moment, he forgot that he was meant to be highly on guard about Asano giving him these things for free. Tears started to trail down his cheeks. He just really needed a hug.

Before Asano could react, Nagisa wrapped him up in one, squeezing him tightly. “T-thank you, Asano kun.”

Asano pulled away sharply. “What are you doing?”

Right. That wasn’t really decent behaviour. Nagisa wiped the wetness from his eyes. “I’m sorry, my emotions have been out of control lately.”

Seeming to soften his guarded stance slightly, Asano coughed. “Well. This is yours for now. The door to the en suite is over there,” he pointed, “just… stay put until I come and get you next.”

“Okay,” Nagisa said, finally dropping the shoes down by the door.

Asano made a swift exit, shutting the door behind him to leave Nagisa alone in the big room. With nothing to do but unpack what little he had, he decided to sit down on the bed. And _wow_ , that was comfortable. He couldn’t resist swinging his legs over, stretching out and lying down properly. He wasn’t as exhausted all the time as he’d been, but it had still been a long day. Nagisa’s eyes fluttered shut.

He’d had to think of something to tell Hiranka san, without potentially tarnishing he reputation. Nagisa wasn’t the best at lies, exactly. In the end, he’d told her that his dad had offered him a place to stay. It was, at least, something the old woman would know not to bring up in front of his mother. That way, nobody would check his whereabouts. Hiranka san hadn’t questioned it either, just shaking her head like normal when Nagisa offered to clean.

It wasn’t like he could just hide in Asano’s house forever, though. What it did, however, was buy him some time. Perhaps, if everything went to plan and they assassinated Korosensei during the trip, Nagisa wouldn’t even have to stay for more than a couple of weeks. With all that money, his share of the ten billion yen prize, he could easily just buy a place. Or at least rent, somewhere.

The next thing he knew, he was jerking upwards, startled by a very persistent knocking noise. Nagisa blinked, noticing that the lighting had changed out of the window. Had he really fallen asleep? He yawned, going to his feet again to open the door.

“Asa-“ Nagisa stopped, noticing that Asano was accompanied by an adult man.

“Nagisa kun,” he said seriously, “this is the family butler, Toboso. I have sworn him to silence.

No way. “Uhm, hi?” Nagisa didn’t know how to speak to a butler. A butler! Though he couldn’t really picture either member of the Asano family cooking or cleaning, he’d definitely never met somebody with a butler before. He wasn’t wearing anything too fancy at least, though he looked as clean and sharp as the rest of the house.

The man bowed his head slightly. “It’s nice to meet you, Nagisa san.”

It was weird for someone so clearly older than him to use such polite address, and it made Nagisa wrinkle his nose just a little.

“Anyway,” Asano waved the butler off, who nodded and left the room. “Toboso will bring you two meals a day. You’ll have to find you own lunch somewhere. Now,” his stare deepened, “we need some ground rules, Nagisa kun.”

That was to be expected. Nagisa stepped aside, allowing Asano into the room.

“Number one is obvious, he sat down on the bed. “At school, you don’t know me. We don’t walk there together, no talking to me like you know me, understand?”

It wasn’t like Nagisa had any plans to talk to him anyway. “That’s fine.”

He nodded. “No disturbing me, either. Unlike the E Class, I value my work.”

Nagisa sighed. No matter how good their grades turned out to be, it seemed the mentality of the rest of the school was doomed to remain the same. Though, he had no real desire to spend time with Asano. But Asano was doing something selfless? Nagisa didn’t really know how to process everything. It made him want to be nice in the very least, or to give at least something back.

“You can go anywhere else here you want, I suppose,” Asano seemed to think aloud. “Nobody over, though. I don’t care how loved up you and Akabane may be, but-“

Maybe it was his crazy hormones, but Nagisa started laughing. More obnoxiously than he had in years. He sat down on the bed, practically clutching his dies as tears of amusement formed at the corner of his eyes.

“It’s not a joke, Nagisa kun.”

“I’m sorry,” he gasped. “It’s just… Me and Karma kun… loved up,” he started laughing again.

“Oh?” The way Asano’s raked to his stomach was unmissed. “I thought he was your-“

“Karma kun isn’t my _anything_.”

Asano shrugged. “It doesn’t make a difference to me. Anyway,” his tone changed sharply, “I will leave you.”

Nagisa wasn’t sure why he was so desperate to leave suddenly, but it didn’t really matter. After the impromptu nap, he decided to just get on with the homework he’d been intending to do originally. It would give him more time to focus on the assassination, at least. The moment he really sat down and focused on it, it wasn’t _that_ hard, and Nagisa had already finished a good amount of it before there was a knock at his door again.

“Nagisa san,” the butler said when Nagisa pulled the door open. “Your dinner.”

He wasn’t exactly sure what the procedure was. “Thank you, Toboso san.”

With a slight hesitancy, he came in, and set down the tray next to where Nagisa was sitting. The sheer smell of the rich food made his mouth start to water. A proper warm and filling meal was exactly what he needed. He’d also been brought a glass of water… and a bottle of pill looking things?

“Toboso san,” he asked, “what are those?”

“Pre-natal vitamins,” he replied, and bowed slightly, “for the baby.”

Nagisa shifted. Those were a thing? He toyed with the bottle, once Toboso had left, suddenly put off the food. He supposed, if he really was going to have a baby, the least he could do was make sure it was healthy. Maybe it was a pure omega thing, but Nagisa definitely felt protective. Which made him feel crazy.

It was that thought, lingering on until he eventually fell asleep, that lead to him sitting in the maternity section of an omega clinic the next morning. Nagisa wasn’t generally the type to feel awkward in social situations, but he just wanted to curl into a small ball. The majority of the room was filled with happy looking couples, but even those who were alone looked as if they were around five to ten years older. He squirmed, eyes firmly planted on the floor, until his name was called.

Ignoring the odd looks, mixed in with a couple of glares, Nagisa made the walk out of the waiting room into the doctor’s office, as instructed. It was pretty small, filled with just a small desk, and what he presumed was an ultrasound machine, with a sort of reclined seat next to it.

He was greeted by a smiling, middle aged woman. “Shiota san! Please, take a seat. Make yourself comfortable.”

Nervously, Nagisa did, feeling particularly observed. “You can use my given name,” he said, and then mentally cursed himself to the force of habit.

“That’s quite alright, Nagisa kun,” she softened. “I’m Doctor Shirogane, and hopefully will be your doctor for the remainder of the pregnancy. So!” Her tone suddenly snapped. “You’re around twelve weeks, yes?”

Nagisa shifted. “I think.”

She nodded. “Well, we’ll find out exactly how far along you are in just a moment. You’ll probably be glad to hear, though, that with luck the worst symptoms from the first trimester will start to go. Although, I will warn you, you might start to develop some nasty heart burn. There are plenty of pregnancy safe medications for that, though!”

He didn’t even know there were pregnancy _dangerous_ medications.

“Okay, Nagisa kun,” she said, gentler. “Let’s have a look at that baby. Please, pull up your shirt a little. This gel might be a little cold, okay?”

Nagisa _really_ didn’t want to, but he did as she said, and rolled his t shirt up to expose his stomach. He couldn’t help but hiss slightly when the gel was indeed freezing for a moment, like ice cubes down the back of a shirt. It was fine after a few seconds, though, and then Doctor Shirogane covered the area with the scanner.

She moved it around a little, before pausing. “Ah, there we go.”

His jaw didn’t drop, exactly, but his throat ran incredibly dry. On the screen, right next to her, was the image of a baby. He’d seen it before, a month or so ago, but he’d barely been able to process it. It looked so unlike the clump of cells he’d been envisioning. There was a head, clearly, a body, tiny legs…

“That’s-“

“Yes,” she beamed. “That’s your baby.”

The image on screen shifted, and Nagisa found himself sitting up more. “It moved.”

“Mm,” Doctor Shirogane confirmed. “Yes, he or she has just developed reflexes at this stage. If you were to hit your stomach, they would flinch, not that you’d be able to feel it yet. They can even suck their thumb.”

She went about her routine of checks, measuring the length of the baby somehow. Nagisa was barely paying attention. His eyes were fixated on the black and white image, watching the baby, his baby, squirm around as the scanner was moved over it. It was hard to wrap his head around the fact that this was all happening _inside_ of him.

“They’re a little on the short side,” she said finally, “but not outside the healthy range. Almost exactly two inches! That’s about the size of a lime.”

Finally taking his eyes off the screen, he looked at his flat stomach, certainly not lime sized. “But…”

She noticed. “Every pregnancy is different, Nagisa kun. You’re young of course, so your skin is bound to be a little tighter than the average person. Because you’re a _male_ omega, your anatomy and the actual positioning of the womb is slightly different from a woman’s. There are a variety of reasons, really, but don’t worry, you should definitely start to notice a bump in the next few weeks. If it hasn’t already, your scent should start to change significantly too.”

Was that what he wanted? He didn’t think so. It would be dumb to think he’d be able to hide a baby forever, but the longer he got to avoid that conversation, the better.

“Anyway,” Doctor Shirogane continued. “I estimate your due date to be the 18th February, give or take a few days.” She smiled, and picked up another device. “Now’s the fun part – would you like to hear the heartbeat?”

Slightly dumbstruck, Nagisa couldn’t help but nod. As she had with the scanner, she moved the wand looking thing over the skin of his lower stomach. And then there it was, clear and loud, beating at lightning pace.

_Ba bump. Ba bump. Ba bump. Ba bump. Ba bump. Ba bump. Ba bump. Ba bump._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, I truly appreciate all comments and kudos!


	8. Technique Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The E Class meet up before their island trip to hone in their assassination plan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You asked for baby bump, I deliver

Tapping his thumbs aimlessly on the screen of his phone, Nagisa read the message over and over. It wasn’t that Sugino was asking for anything outrageous. He just wanted to meet up a little early, before heading to their training. Although it was the summer break, Karasuma had called their class in for a few extra assassination lessons, before the main event of their trip. It was optional, but Nagisa couldn’t miss it. It was odd, how much he enjoyed learning the art of assassination.

His eyes raked over to the copy of his scan photo, resting on the nightstand. Nagisa had naturally been doing that for a couple of days, ever since his doctor has asked him if he wanted a copy. It wasn’t exactly the same as it had been in the office, when he could literally watch it moving, but he was still trying to wrap his head around it, this living thing inside of him.

If he were to shift his gaze down just a little, he’d meet the collection of adoption leaflets. Eventually, Doctor Shirogane had managed to get it into his head that it was definitely an option, though she clarified she was no expert. He knew he couldn’t avoid it forever. Every time Nagisa shut his eyes and tried to imagine himself with a baby, he just couldn’t picture it. It wasn’t like he knew much about babies other than what he saw in popular media, either. He knew babies cried, sure, but how was he supposed to know what they were crying for? He also only had about a five hundred yen to his name. Babies were more expensive than that, weren’t they? Plus he didn’t know how he’d be able to look after it, unless he dropped out.

A baby was impossible. But so was the idea of letting some other people he’d never even met before have his. How was he meant to know that they weren’t secretly psychopaths or something? The leaflets had stressed that there were different types, but the words were swimming the longer he looked at it. He still had another six months to decide, at least.

Maybe he should tell Sugino about it. After all, they were best friends… But aside from having no clue how Sugino would react, Nagisa didn’t know how he could even begin to bring it up. Of course, it was about to become very obvious very fast. As the thought came, Nagisa ran his hands down to his stomach. It was like going to the doctors had cursed him, or something, because even the very next day he started to notice his stomach was not as flat as he was used to.

After the lime analogy, Nagisa had looked up more of the fruit comparisons. Currently, the internet agreed his baby was the size of a peach. After staring at himself from every angle he possibly could in the mirror, he didn’t look _unmistakably_ pregnant, but there was definitely a curve to his abdomen that hadn’t been there before. He could probably pass it off like he just ate a lot, maybe.

He eventually decided to just bite the bullet and meet up with Sugino, though he still wasn’t sure about whether he’d tell him or not. The next morning, Nagisa spent the longest he ever had choosing an outfit. It wasn’t like he’d had much time to pack the clothes he needed, in fact when his mother kicked him out he’d blindly grabbed items and hoped for the best. Nagisa just ended up going for the loosest t shirt he had, adding a sweater vest at the last minute in case he really needed to cover something.

Sugino didn’t seem to notice at all, far more distracted by some bugs. “Woah just look at them all.”

“Why are we here at school?” Nagisa asked, having been roped into carrying a box for his insects. They were just a bit away from the main building, far enough into the forest for some decent bug collecting.

“Well…” Sugino said a little nervously, “I don’t want everyone to see me out catching bugs at my age. I’m a city boy – I’ve always wanted to do this. And Karma happened to point me to a tree with some good bugs on it.”

Nagisa wasn’t sure why and when Karma and Sugino had had an actual conversation independently, especially about bugs of all things. Then again, that was probably just the disadvantage that came with avoiding him for weeks. He probably couldn’t keep that up for much longer.

“I didn’t expect _you_ to come, Maehara,” Sugino turned. “Never pegged you as an insect fan.” 

Maehara peaked out from the tree he was leaning against. “Our next assassination’ll be at that island resort, right? Wouldn’t you say we’re missing a little something?”

“Like what?” Sugino asked.

“Money!” Maehara exclaimed excitedly. Although they got along just fine, Nagisa wasn’t really close with Maehara, so any hope of telling Sugino about the baby had been quickly diminished. He wasn’t ready to make it major public news. “You need buying power if you’re going to snag yourself a swim suited babe! That runt won’t do the trick… but a giant stag beetle? Those babies’ll get you tens of thousands of yen! Auction them off online for major cashola- we’ll make at least enough to cover a fancy dinner and a place to chill out!” He sped off, presumably to look for the bugs.

Sugino sighed. “I think he’s forgotten what this trip’s all about.”

“Yeah,” Nagisa agreed. “Not exactly a fifteen year old’s vacation plans.”

“That won’t work!” Maehara stopped in his tracks, and Nagisa and Sugino looked up in the direction of the sudden, female voice. “Giant stag beetles? Those are old news!”

“Kurahashi?” Maehara questioned, staring above him where she was sat in the tree.

“Morning! You’re all here to scrape up some spending money too, huh?”

“Hey,” Sugino said, “what do you mean stag beetles are old news?”

She hopped down. “Well… I guess they were super pricey right around when we were born, but today’s artificial breeding methods have saturated the market, bringing their prices way down.”

“The Great Stag Beetle Crash!” Maehara exclaimed. “I thought one beetle would about pay for one babe.”

“No way,” Kurahashi waved him off. “These days, babes are way more expensive.”

“You sure know a lot about this, Kurahashi,” Sugino said. “Are you into bugs?”

“Yep! Along with every other living thing! Hey, since we’re all here… Let’s all go bug hunting! We’re bound to find tons if we all try!”

It was better than being cooped up inside with only Asano for company, at least. He was actually enjoying the fresh air, and the sun on his skin. Even if they were only searching for bugs, it was something that felt _normal_.

“Mmm pretty nice haul” Kurahashi called out, pointing to a small net kind of thing, holding a dozen bugs or so. 

“Woah! Did you set this?” Sugino asked, coming over to admire the handiwork.

“My own homemade trap. I put it out last night. There are about twenty more of them out there, so that’s about a thousand yen a piece if we’re lucky.” Kurahashi explained, pointing to a few other marked locations on a map.

“Not too shabby for a side job!” Sugino sounded impressed. So was Nagisa. If done with the level of expertise that Kurahashi appeared to be displaying, it seemed just as viable as a regular career.

“I hope we caught the one I was looking for!” She said, almost wistfully.

Yet another voice called out from an upper location. “What an inefficient trap. And you call yourselves the E Class?”

“Okajima!” Maehara looked up.

What was with the amount of people hiding in trees that day?

“Pulling in a measly thousand yen at a time? Yeah right.” Okajima leapt out of the tree. “My trap’ll bring in a cool ten billion!”

Was he talking about the assassination?! “Ten billion… you don’t mean-“ Nagisa let out.

“Oh, but I do. If we’re planning an assassination on this southern isle, that octopus’ll be letting his guard down in the meantime. And _that’s_ what I’m after.”

He began to walk down hill slightly, and Nagisa and the small party that had now formed began to follow him. He ducked down into the bushes, and pointed over at the clearing. Korosensei was sat in the centre, wearing a weird bug costume, on top of a pile of magazines. With a little closer inspection, it was clearly all pornographic.

“Oh yeah – here we go! He went right for my dirty book trap!” Okajima continued. “Wow. When do you see the speedy Korosensei moving that _slowly_? That one must be right up his alley… And what’s with the stag beetle dress up? Is he trying to blend in? That’s just sad.” He cleared his throat, tone darkening slightly. “Every mountain has one: the porn repository. The kids who find their dreams there grow old enough to buy their own dirty magazines, then leave behind dreams for someone else to find. It’s a place of never ending dreams!” Once again, his tone changed, like the snap of a band. I’m glad you’re here! Lend me a hand- our porn power’ll give him a dream he’ll never wake up from!”

Nagisa shifted. If Maehara had been crass before, Okajima was bringing their small group to the maximum level.

“I did some major research on his top turn ons, you know. Can’t buy the stuff myself, but I found a few.”

Nagisa thought for a moment. “Wouldn’t he like anything with big boobs?”

“As it turns out, yeah,” Okajima pulled out his phone, handing it to Nagisa.

His camera files showed dozens of close up images of Korosensei with different styles of magazines, annotated with a few pretty detailed notes on his reactions, and how effective the porn had seemed to be. It was a level of dedication and careful planning that Nagisa didn’t really expect from someone like Okajima.

“That’s amazing, Okajima kun. So for the last month, you’ve been swapping out porn and carefully observing his reactions?”

Sugino sighed. “No grown up ought to be picking up a month’s worth of porn mags! That’s just sad.”

 “It’s just like your traps, Kurahashi,” Okajima continued. “You get absorbed in studying your prey for a long time too, right?”

“Yeah…” Kurahashi didn’t seem like she enjoyed that comparison.

“I’ve got a dirty mind. If you want to hate me for it, go on ahead. But it’s only because I’m a super-lech that I know: pornography can save the world.” Okajima pulled out his blade.

Somehow, he managed to make such a statement sound inspiring. He was almost… cool.

“I’ll get him, alright! Under all that porn is a net strung with anti-sensei BB’s! He’s deep in that book now – we can nab him for sure! Someone cut this rope and trigger the trap. I’ll jump in there and finish him off!”

There was no harm in trying. Anything can be a sword if you polish it enough. Okajima’s porn sword might just run Korosensei through. Before Nagisa could cut the trigger, Korosensei’s attention was taken away from the porn, and his eyes extended like a bug.

 “What the- His eyes went all ‘bwoop’“ Maehara exclaimed.

“I don’t have any data on that face!” Okajima looked nervous “What kind of porn does _that_ signify?!”

“There you are!” Korosensei said cheerfully, holding something. “A Miyama stag beetle. And with that eye colour!”

Kurahashi appeared to have forgotten that they were trying to ambush him, and jumped out from the bush, gasping. “Are they white, Korosensei?!”

“Ah, Kurahashi chan! Indeed they are!” Korosensei said.

“Wow! Just what I’ve been looking for!”

“Yes, right here on this mountain!”

Okajima cursed to himself. “Oh man, and we were so close!”

Nagisa couldn’t really hear what they were talking about, but they were jumping up and down on the pile of porn magazines excitedly, deep in discussion about whatever Korosensei had seen. Then, he looked down, and his face changed completely.

“Mortifying! How super duper mortifying! I’m so ashamed… such behaviour is unbecoming of an educator. I knew there was a trap under all of this porn but with each magazine more to my taste than the last, I couldn’t resist!”

“He saw right through it!” Okajima said, as the rest of them came out into the clearing.

Nagisa couldn’t help but laugh slightly to himself. Of course Korosensei had.

“So what’s the big deal, Kurahashi?” Sugino asked. “That’s a Miyama stag beetle, right? In games and stuff, they sell for way less than a giant stag.”

Kurahashi smiled. “Miyamas have been going for a good price lately. They’re hard to breed. One this size could fetch twenty thousand.”

“Twenty thousand?!”

“Plus, take a good look at its eyes,” Korosensei interjected. “They’re usually black, but these are white. I told you about albinism, right?”

“Oh yeah – like super rare creatures born pure white?” Sugino remembered.

“Yes, and stag beetles are only albino in the eyes. A natural born Miyama white eye, as they’re known, is extremely rare. Why, this even has academic value. You could sell this for hundreds of thousands of yen, easy.” Korosensei handed the beetle to Kurahashi.

“Hundreds?!”

Nagisa could do so much with that money. He could even maybe rent a place somewhere until everything blew over, which would cut off any power Asano had over him.

“I told Korosensei I wanted to see one just once, and he said he’d use his zoom eyes to find one for me.” Kurahashi explained. Okay, you lowlifes: raise your hand if you want this baby!”

“I do!!!” They all shouted at once.

“What to do, what to do?” She laughed, and then sprinted off.

“I was the one who caught it!” Korosensei wailed.

Unwilling to miss out on their chance at such good money, they all took off after her. Being naturally more athletic, Maehara and Sugino sped ahead. Nagisa wasn’t exactly a slow runner, but carrying a small human inside of him seemed to have decreased his maximum speed, as even Okajima was ahead of him.

Though, Okajima didn’t have much of a sense of direction, and ran directly off the edge of the small cliff, falling into the water. Hundreds of thousands of yen it may be, but Nagisa couldn’t have it on his conscience to leave somebody in danger over that.

“Are you okay?!” He called, hoping Okajima hadn’t hurt himself too badly.

“’M fine!” Okajima shouted back up at him, demonstrating he could pull himself out of the water.

Nagisa relaxed. “We should be getting to class by now, anyway!”

It was, after all, the real reason everybody was hanging around. Nagisa made his way to the class building, changing into the normal school PE kit. They had a week left before the assassination, so every second of preparation counted. Due to the nature of their strategy, Karasuma had everyone on target practise. It wasn’t exactly a weakness, but marksmanship was hardly Nagisa’s strong suit. He could still reliably hit a stationary target, though.

 “Well, well,” Bitch Sensei had joined them, though she was reclining casually. “I see you little brats are working up a good sweat, summer vacation notwithstanding.”

“You train too, Bitch Sensei,” Mimura suggested. “Your gun and knife skills aren’t that much better than ours.”

“Grown ups are sneaky.” She said with confidence. “I’ll hitch a ride on your strategy and only take away the best parts.

“That’s my Irina.” A man appeared behind her.

“L-lovro, sensei!”

Nagisa, and the rest of the class who had decided to attend, snapped up to attention. They’d all seen glimpses of the pro assassin before, that time he visited to determine whether Bitch Sensei was still a decent enough assassin. He’d never interacted with the class, but everyone was more than conscious of him watching from the shadows.

“He’s here as a special instructor for the summer.” Karasuma announced. “He’ll give us tips on our strategy -from a pro’s perspective.”

Lovro looked disapprovingly at Bitch Sensei. “Rest one day and your fingers and arms forget about killing. If you don’t want to flunk out, hurry up and get changed!”

“Yes! Absolutely!” She rushed off.

It was almost amusing. How scary a master could Lovro have been for Bitch Sensei to obey his orders? Nagisa didn’t feel fear, particularly. It was more like an awe at being in the presence of such a seasoned assassin. He felt questions rise to the surface he didn’t even know he could think up.

“Thank you for your cooperation,” Lovro nodded. “Please, back to your training.”

Hard to not feel a little on display, Nagisa did the best he could to return his full focus to the shooting. His brain was bubbling over. He found himself watching Lovro and Karasuma, deep in discussion, more than he was watching the targets. Once everyone was taking a small break, and not paying any attention to him, Nagisa couldn’t help himself.

“Lovro san?”

He looked down at him. “Yes?”

Nagisa bit his lip. “What is the very best assassin like?”

“So you’re interested in the world of assassins, eh?” Lovro said it in an odd way, as if he was leading on to something.

Feeling a sudden rush of shame, Nagisa looked away. “Oh, uh, th-that’s not why I…”

“Well,” he began to narrate, “there’s only one person on this planet who can be called the very best assassin. As is often the case in this line of work, no one knows his real name. They call him by one nickname… and that is: The Reaper. Elusive, incomparably cold blooded, and with piles of bodies in his wake, he is known by the name of Death himself. If you keep having trouble killing your target… The Reaper will show up sooner or later.”

Someone like that?! Nagisa felt some kind of urge swell up inside him. He didn’t want this famous assassin to get a shot in. Like they had some sort of ownership over Korosensei’s assassination. He was determined they beat this Reaper to it.

Lovro seemed to notice. “Alright, young man. I shall teach you a sure fire technique.”

“Sure fire?”

“Yes. An instant kill move, from this pro assassin to you. Okay, show me how your best attack.”

That was putting him on the spot, a lot. Nagisa was determined, though. He pulled out his knife, took a deep breath, and went for the attack in the way Karasuma had taught them. Lovro easily dodged his every offence, like it was nothing. He was just as good as Karasuma, if not better. Instead of keeping up the session, however, Lovro easily disarmed him and knocked Nagisa down to his knees in one swift movement. He was _tough_.

“Why aren’t you attacking in the way I heard so much about?”

Lovro had heard of _him_? Nagisa looked up from the ground, dazed. “Wouldn’t you be expecting it?”

He smiled. “Sometimes, it’s warped expectations that are the most effective.” He pulled Nagisa to his feet. Before Nagisa could really react, something shifted, and the most piercing bang shook through him, knocking him to his feet once more. Lovro hadn’t even _touched_ him.

“Was that the surefire technique?” Nagisa looked up in awe.

“Yes. But then again, it didn’t look like one, did it? When I was in a tight spot as an assassin, I used this to squeeze my way out. But it has conditions that must be met – three of them. First: you must have two weapons. Second: you must be up against an expert. And third: your foe must know the terror of being killed.”

He pulled Nagisa up again. “A sure fire, instant kill move doesn’t necessarily kill instantly. Given the ideal conditions, of course, any assassin can do the deed. But reality is rarely that agreeable, especially when your target is a pro with airtight defence. But this technique can create an ideal killing situation in just such a pinch. It sets the stage for an instant kill.”

“Sets the stage, huh?”

“Every assassin has a second blade. Yours, I’ve heard, is your demeanour. _Use_ that. Move from a standstill, as fast as you can, and make it as loud as possible. You’ve probably heard the comparison that your blade is an extension of your body. So. Time it just after dropping the knife. The closer you get, the more the target is focused on the knife. Toss that focus with the knife as though placing them into mid-air, and an assassin will not overlook those few moments. In one fluid motion, swiftly draw your second blade. A literal second blade. That’s how you make your kill.”

Nagisa felt chills run down his body. “You think I can do all that?”

Lovro looked as though he was studying Nagisa very carefully. “I don’t take omegas into my charge. Not that any have ever asked, being against an omega’s very nature to kill. But even if they managed to find that bloodlust, against all odds, it’s too dangerous. Omegas are delicate, too easy to manipulate and damage. But, Shiota Nagisa, maybe on this one thing I would like nothing more than to be proved wrong.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, I appreciate all comments and kudos!


	9. Assassination Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The E Class begins their island trip and carries out their planned assassination

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> With special thanks to my girl Issy who studies Chemistry at university - who has enough patience for me to pop up every now and then like 'hey give me something complicated and sciencey'

“Asano kun,” Nagisa said, popping his head into the kitchen. “I’m going to leave in a minute.”

Asano put down his pen. “What did I say about disturbing me when I’m working?”

Nagisa just smiled. They’d had this conversation a few times, but Asano never seemed to actually mind. In fact, Nagisa definitely got the feeling he enjoyed talking about whatever he was reading. Perhaps he liked the sound of his own voice. “What are you learning about?”

“Splitting patterns in phosphorus NMR spectroscopy.”

He frowned. Nagisa had never really had much chemistry with the sciences. “What does that mean?”

Asano sighed, slamming his book shut. “NMR stands for nuclear magnetic resonance.”

“Nuclear?” Nagisa thought about it. “Like the stuff that explodes right?”

Clenching his fist around it, Asano grabbed the book and thrust it into Nagisa’s hands. “That is _not_ what nuclear means. You’re in desperate need of this. Honestly I know you’re in the E Class but I never realised your understanding of science was so… pathetic.”

 The words he said were mean, but the gesture was actually pretty kind. Nagisa accepted the book. “I’ll read it on the boat… Did you get around to reading Sonic Ninja yet?”

Asano rolled his eyes. “I don’t have the time for American comics.” He paused. “I saw the mafia plot coming.”

“You should watch the movie,” Nagisa said. “They combined a lot of the arcs.”

“We’ll watch it when you get back,” he shrugged.

He wanted to watch it _with_ Nagisa? They’d barely even interacted with each other, aside from Nagisa trying to make polite conversation. He’d built more of a relationship with Toboso. Still, it _was_ his favourite movie. For a guy who seemed to know everything, it was almost fun to be able to show him things. Nagisa couldn’t stop his smile.

“Don’t you have a boat to catch, Nagisa kun?”

“Right!” Nagisa picked up his bag again. “I’ll see you later, then.”

Asano stood up. “Nagisa kun…” he took a deep breath. “Have a safe trip. And don’t forget our little lesson.”

Like his words were a punch directly to the stomach, Nagisa nodded. “I promise.”

It turned out, by the time he was on the boat, that the book was even more complicated that it had initially sounded. It was probably university level, if Nagisa had to guess. He was still committed, though, and managed several chapters of it, even if he didn’t really understand what he was reading. Standing out on the deck and staring at the ocean got a little old, after a few hours. Eventually though, there was enough commotion to signify that they’d definitely reached the island. Nagisa was pretty thankful to be on dry land again.

“Welcome to the Fukumajima Resort Hotel!” A smartly dressed man said, the moment they reached the resort. “Please enjoy this tropical juice with our compliments.”

Nagisa thought about taking one, but he remembered Doctor Shirogane briefly mentioning that there were certain things he should definitely avoid eating. Fruit juice was probably fine, but he didn’t want to risk it without knowing exactly what it was. He wasn’t the only one not taking it, anyway.

“We can go directly to the beach from the hotel.” Korosensei announced. “Seems like they have plenty of other leisure activities, too.”

He couldn’t hear the full conversation, but Mimura must’ve said something about splitting into groups – just as they’d planned to kick off the assassination. They’d already discussed their roles in great detail, of course. Nagisa’s group would be ‘snorkelling’, though in reality their job was to find the location for the assassination, incorporating water. Walking towards the hotel, Nagisa had already seen a couple of good positions, out of the corner of his eye.

Korosensei, at first, decided to go gliding. That was good news, as he’d be far out of the way and too distracted to get a real taste of what they were doing. As the groups dispersed, Nagisa and the rest of their group changed into the wetsuits provided by the resort. He felt highly self-conscious in something so skin tight. The baby could pass for a very large lunch, though, he thought. Nagisa would just have to make sure to be seen eating a lot.

“Group one is doing a good job of throwing him off,” Sugino commented, once they were sat on the jetty.

“They sure are – and with a little assassination in the mix.” Karma replied, looking up at Korosensei flying around in the air. “They’re trying not to draw the other groups’ attention.”

Nagisa handed him the goggles. “Yeah…”  It was basically the only word Nagisa had spoken to the alpha in weeks.

“We’re up next!” Kayano snapped him out of it. “Let’s do what we have to do and get changed ASAP!”  

“Got it!” Sugino ducked under the water.

Nagisa stood, and took a deep breath. Everything would go to plan. He dove into the sea, feeling the cool relief of water against his skin. All they needed to do was find a great location, and they’d already agreed that one of the small chapels would be the perfect place, being dome shaped already.

“If we shortened some of this wood somehow,” Karma surfaced after they’d surveyed the area for a few minutes, “this building would be low enough for the high tide.”

“Korosensei would already be wet,” Nagisa realised, “and weakened.”

“Let’s get to work!” Kayano said cheerfully.

It wasn’t the easiest of jobs, lowering an entire wooden structure, but there was an underlying fire between each of them. They were so close now, to assassinating their teacher and winning the bounty, that Nagisa would at least be willing to try the most impossible sounding things to get to that goal.

It was already nearly sunset by the time they were done, and met up with the others on the beach. The other groups seemed to have done a good job distracting him, as Korosensei looked totally worn out, lounging out on the seating.

“Phew what fun that was. No wonder I’m so tan!” He said, skin (?) that was usually yellow completely tinted dark.

Kimura looked at him. “Even your teeth are tan.”

“So much for picking up on your expressions,” Okano sighed.  

Isogai cleared his throat, sticking to their plan. “Alright, Korosensei, after dinner comes the assassination.”

“Yes, yes. The shipboard restaurant!” Korosensei got up, and walked away from them. They couldn’t tell his facial expressions, but Nagisa was sure it would have been one of underestimation. It was probably good to be confident, but he didn’t even know how it could possibly go wrong.

“Hasn’t that octopus had enough fun for a day?” Terasaka complained. “Meanwhile, we got to pretend to have fun whilst _we_ got everything ready!”

Yoshida shrugged. “Well, if we kill him today, we can just enjoy ourselves tomorrow.”  

“I guess,” Muramatsu replied. “Let’s give this some oomph and finish the job!”

It was just a waiting game until the boat arrived. Everything else was completely set up, save for the video that still needed some editing. They all knew the plan by heart, but Nagisa found himself zoning out of the conversation, going over it in his head over and over.

“You don’t feel sick, do you, Nagisa kun?” Karma asked, taking him out of the thought train.

Though a quick look over made Nagisa think that Karma was showing genuine concern, rather than teasing him, he still felt perhaps unreasonably frustrated. Nagisa had never been the type to hold grudges, but he realised that even with the distance he’d recently enforced between them, he was still _angry_. Nagisa was sick of being babied, treated like a helpless omega who could do nothing for himself.

“The ship’s here,” Nagisa said instead of actually answering. Though he was mad, he wasn’t unreasonable enough to take it out on Karma solely for asking him if he felt okay. He was just… on edge.

Once the plate of food was put in front of him, Nagisa’s appetite was completely lost. He would really have to force himself, especially if he was going for the ‘my stomach is totally just the result of a large meal, no babies to see here’ angle. Maybe if he ate enough, he’d get fat all over, and nobody would even notice the significance of his stomach, hence avoiding the awkward ‘announcement’ of the baby.

“Here we are on the shipboard restaurant we rented out.” Isogai announced. “Let’s slowly savour our meal as we take in the night sea.”

“I get it…” Korosensei thought. “First you’ll get me good and seasick to weaken my capabilities, eh?”

If only it was just that. Isogai nodded. “Of course. That’s assassination 101.”

“You’re so right. But will it really work that well?” Korosensei took a hold of his glass. “Seasickness is no match for a teacher who’s all pumped up anticipating an assassination-“

“You’re too dark!”

If Korosensei could frown, he probably would’ve. “Am I really that dark?”

“Forget your expression,” Nakamura complained. “We can’t even tell your front from your back”

“It’s too confusing.” Kataoka agreed. “Do something, would you?”

“Have you forgotten, students? I can molt, and in so doing, shed this dark skin!” As if to demonstrate as he spoke, Korosensei shed his skin carelessly. “There! Back to normal!”

Fuwa perked up. “That’s your once monthly molt!”

“Just another of its uses,” he lectured, “I tend to save it for particularly sticky situations, but-” In that brief moment, Korosensei realised what the room had been thinking.  

He’d just put himself in an even worse situation, practically in the palm of their hands. They’d been training for ages, and perhaps this time their blades would finally reach him. The tension remained high at that level throughout dinner, bloodlust growing strong in everyone’s hearts. Once they were off the ship, Korosensei appeared incredibly sick, just like the plan.

 “Alright, Korosensei, it’s after dinner,” Maehara said cheerfully.

“Here’s where we’re meeting,” Sugaya pointed out, “a floating chapel, away from the hotel”

They lead him inside, and took their agreed positions.

“Take a seat, Korosensei,” Okajima said.

Isogai smiled. “There’s nowhere for you to run.”

“This’ll be a fun assassination,” Mimura said.

“We’ll start with a movie” Okajima announced, looking over at the screen that they’d already set up.

“Your intelligence, inventiveness, and your earnest efforts…” Korosensei said, much like a proud parent. “That’s what I most look forward to. I expect a no-holds-barred assassination! Now, then… What on earth are you going to do, hmm?”

“First you’ll be enjoying a video Mimura put together,” Isogai explained, “then the seven top testers will destroy your tentacles. That’ll be the signal for us all to jump in and begin the assassination. Does that sound alright, Korosensei?” Isogai

Korosensei laughed. “More than alright.”

“Thanks for setting this up, Mimura,” Sugaya looked over at him

“It was hard work – I was editing all through dinner,” Mimura replied.

“Korosensei,” Nagisa took his position, stepping forwards. “I have to pat you down first. We may be surrounded by water, but if you smuggled in that swimsuit, you’d still be able to get away.”

Korosensei beamed “You’re being so careful! But I wouldn’t pull such a dirty trick.”

Nagisa wished he could just strike him right then, when he wasn’t expecting it. This teacher could easily dodge his attacks even when he’s touching him, however, Nagisa knew. But if they all worked together… Well, they were about to find out. He nodded, letting the rest of their class know that there was no foul play to look out for.

“Are you ready?” Korosensei took his seat. “No need to hold back! Come right at me!”

“Here we go, Korosensei,” Okajima turned off the lights.

That was their grand signal. Silently, in the darkness, as the movie exposing some of Korosensei’s worst moments began to play, Nagisa and most of the others left the chapel and took their positions. They had about an hour to get completely set up, before their assassination would truly begin. It seemed like a long time, but in the moment it went by in the blink of an eye. There was no time for conversation or anything else, only focus.

“Commence operation,” Ritsu finally announced, “five seconds elapsed.”

That was their signal. Kayano took off on her speed boat, along with the three other students with the responsibility, which had been attached to the wooden structure. With all four of them pulling at such a high speed, the wood came off with ease.

“Thirty five seconds elapsed!”

It was time. Nagisa, and the remainder of the E Class who weren’t shooting, activated their flyboards. Using their well-honed in balance that Karasuma had taught them, they shot up, joining together to make a complete hydraulic cage around their teacher. Nagisa found himself repeating the plan to himself, even then. Korosensei didn’t do well with sudden changes to his environment, so from the chapel to a cage of water, his weakened tentacles would become confused and lower his reaction speed even further.

Ritsu began to fire, which was everyone else’s signal – those who weren’t involved in the cage at least – to start shooting. Their goal wasn’t to hit him, but to actually aim away to confuse him. The final blow goes to those two, Chiba and Hayami, who had left onshore dummies fused with their scent. All they had to do was rise up from the sea, and deliver one final shot.

And then everything went ‘ _boom_ ’.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry that not of different from canon content is really going to happen in this last chapter and maybe the next two, but I promise it'll be worth it! I'm going to try and get them out as quick as I can so we can get to the parts some of you have been waiting for~ All comments and kudos give me life and motivation!


	10. Mystery Illness Time - Second Period

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With the failure of their assassination, some members of the E Class fall ill.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, apologies that this is more of a 'building up' chapter, but I promise, the next two are pretty cool. Regardless, I hope you enjoy :3

“Nagisa!”

The sound of Kayano’s voice and the boat engine caused Nagisa to snap out of his blank shock, just a little. He knew he’d been thrown back by the explosion, right into the water, but Nagisa wasn’t hurt. Maybe the adrenaline was to blame for that. Something felt different about this. It was so unlike the other attempts, Nagisa felt like it just might have worked.

“Stay alert! He can regenerate!” Karasuma ran down the jetty, followed by Bitch sensei.“Isogai kun, Kataoka san: change of plans. Watch the water!”

“Yes sir!”

Korosensei had nowhere to run, even if he _had_ survived the shot!

“Over there!” Kayano pointed.

In the sea, bubbles were staring to form. Nagisa was no science genius, but it was surely possible that there was something in Korosensei’s DNA that could react with the water in such a way. Then, a tiny ball floated the surface, inside it containing what looked like Korosensei’s gloating face. What the hell was _that_?

It laughed. “My trump card of all trump cards: My Absolute Defence Form! The exterior is crystallised high-density condensed energy. The energy left over upon shrinking my body down hardens in a shell around it. In this form, I’m absolutely invincible! ”

Nagisa’s heart dropped. That was Korosensei’s voice. He was completely alive and well, by the looks of it, unharmed. All their greatest efforts, and they’d completely failed.

“No… So if you always stay in that form, we can never kill you!” Yada realised

“If only that were the case,” he said. “The energy crystal will decay in about one day. And the moment it does, my body will re-inflate, absorbing energy and returning to its usual form. On the other hand, for the approximately one day until this crystal decays, I can’t move an inch. This brings with it certain risks. What I’m most afraid of is being placed into a high speed rocket during that time and discarded in the far reaches of outer space… But I’ve thoroughly studied that eventuality. Nowhere in the world is there a rocket capable of making that flight within twenty four hours.”

It almost seemed unfair. After all that, he’d had yet another trick up his sleeve. Even taking all his weak points into account, it was an utter failure. Killing him seemed definitely impossible.

Terasaka picked him up. “Invincible, my ass. Something like this has got to be breakable somehow!”

“It’s no use! Even a nuclear bomb wouldn’t leave a scratch.”

“Oh I get it,” Karma, said casually, from the shore. “No weaknesses means we’re out of options.” He signalled Terasaka, who threw Korosensei over, and then showed him something on his phone.

“No! Stop! I can’t cover my face without any hands!” Korosensei complained.

“Sorry, sorry, then I’ll just… stick this sea slug on you.” Karma continued, as if embarrassing him to death was an option. “Someone go find me a filthy old guy so I can jam this thing down his shorts!”

“No! Help!” Korosenseu tried.

“In some ways we can do whatever we want with him,” Kayano said, though she sounded miserable.

“Yep.” Nagisa agreed. “And Karma’s positively gifted at times like this.”

“We’ll disperse for now, students.” Karasuma sighed. “The top brass and I will discuss how to deal with this one.”

“Going to throw me in a pool of anti-me material? It won’t work. A portion of my energy would explode; like before, the blast would send everything nearby flying. But you should be proud. Even the armies of the world couldn’t get this far with me. It all comes down to the magnificence of your plan.”

He could speak their praises all he liked, but it wouldn’t change anything. He was still _alive_. Korosensei continued to praise their assassination like he always did, but it was their biggest disappointment yet. They’d been so sure, it was more of a shock that their full throttle attack had missed the mark than being knocked back into the water had been. Nagisa just felt so exhausted.

With nothing more to gain, everyone quietly made their way back to the hotel. Nagisa gathered that the rest of the group shared his sentiment of just wanting to curl up and go to bed, but it still felt as though they were waiting for some news, like some validation that they weren’t all massive failures. They sat around downstairs, almost in complete silence.

 “I’m just so exhausted!” Maehara finally said.

“Let’s head back to our room and rest.” Mimura agreed. “I don’t feel like doing anything.”

Terasaka stood up. “What, one lousy miss and you lose all your oomph? We did what we were supposed to do, so tomorrow we can just enjoy ourselves!”

“Ooh, yeah!” Okajima announced. “Tomorrow I get to take in some swimsuited beauties for sure! No matter how tired I may be, I’m not too tired for a nosebleed!”

“Man, I just don’t have the energy,” Maehara groaned, and collapsed against the table.

As he often did in that kind of situation, Nagisa laughed awkwardly. Something was wrong, he just knew it like an itch underneath the surface of his skin. Everybody was _too_ exhausted. There was the fatigue that came with failure, but this felt like something else, something less psychological.

“Can I lean on you a second, Nagisa kun?” Nakamura asked, approaching him before her knees buckled. She fell to the ground before Nagisa could move to catch her.  

She’d just confirmed his fears. Nagisa kneeled to her level. “Nakumra san!”

“I want to get back to the room and change, but my body can’t seem to move at all,” she said weakly

Nagisa put a hand on her forehead, immediately jerking it away. “You’re burning up!”

“Just imagining those babes gave me a nosebleed!” Okajima said lightly, blood gushing out of him.

“Okajima kun!” Now Nagisa was seriously worried.

“I-is this-” Karasuma rushed in, but stopped dead before he could finish his announcement. A quick glance around told Nagisa that almost half of their class was suffering.  “Hey! Where’s the hospital on this island?” Karasuma asked one of the resort staff

“Uh… well, it’s such a small island…”

Before he could argue with her, he got some kind of phone call. With the way his eyes widened after a few seconds, Nagisa could tell it wasn’t good news.

“Who is this?!” Karusuma asked, displaying the alarm in his tone.

Kayano thought fast, opening her phone. “Hey Ritsu!” That was right, if Karasuma didn’t know who he was talking to, there might be some way of Ritsu tracking it. As Karasuma continued to listen, Nagisa watched the phone, and location of the caller slowly get revealed.

Karasuma’s brow creased. “You mean _you_ did this?”

He gestured Nagisa and Kayano towards him. Quickly, Nagisa held up the phone, showing him where the call had originated from. Alarmingly, it looked like it was from the island itself. Karasuma hung up the phone, and slammed Korosensei down on the table with a rage Nagisa had never seen from him before.

Taking a deep breath, he looked over at them. “Class, I need to make a quick phone call. I’ll explain everything after.”

Nagisa and Kayano looked between each other. He didn’t know what was happening, but it was definitely serious. They’d never witnessed Karasuma get so fired up like that before.

“Alright.” He cleared his throat, finally. “This appears to be a hostage situation. Somebody has infected a good portion of this class with what he calls an ‘artificial virus’. He claims that it is very deadly, and could kill the infected within a week. There is an antidote, but he wants us to exchange Korosensei, and specifically the two smallest students, for it at the reception of that other resort on the mountain.” He paused. “Now, the best thing to do is to stay calm-“

Calm?! How were they meant to stay calm? He’d just said that half of their friends could be dead unless they met some stranger’s crazy demands. The two smallest students undeniably referred to himself and Kayano. Were they about to become hostages? Nagisa would do it, if it would save everybody else.

“Mr Karasuma! As we’d expected, it’s no use!” A woman who Nagisa vaguely felt like he’d seen before rushed in. Perhaps she worked with Karasuma. “Even when we play the government card, the hotel just responds with claims of privacy protection.”

“It figures.” He said, stormily.

“It does?”

Karasuma sighed. “That mountaintop hotel is a noted site for illegal negotiations.”

“A remote island in the southern sea?” Bitch Sensei considered. “Couldn’t ask for a better location.”

“They have connections with some government higher ups.“ Karasuma announced. “Even the police are hands off”

Karma folded his arms. “Clearly _they’re_ not going to cooperate with us”

“What are we gonna do?” Yoshida finally verbalised. “At this rate, a lot of us will die! We didn’t come here to _be_ killed.”

“Calm down, Yoshida kun.” Hara reassured him, despite being one of the infected herself. “We won’t die that easy. Just come up with a way to deal with this.”

“Yeah… sorry, Hara,” he bowed his head.

“It’s too dicey to do what he says.” Terasaka said, matter of factly. “Send your two runtiest students? These two squirts?!” To demonstrate, he gave Nagisa and Kayano a good whack on the head. “We’d just be handing him hostages! First off, I’m pissed at anyone who would even do this kind of thing. No one lays a finger on my cohorts! I say we ignore his demands! Let’s get everyone to a Tokyo hospital!”

“I’m opposed.” Takeybashi cut in. “If it really is an unknown, artificial virus, even the biggest hospitals won’t have the antivirals to stop it. The time wasted in bringing in the sick could hurt them more.”

“Say what?!” Terasaka exclaimed.

Takebayashi knelt down next to the infected. “We’ll work on treating the symptoms for now – you’d better hurry off to the trade spot.”

“Takebayashi…”

He was right, though, Nagisa realised. Their hands were tied. If Korosensei could move, they might’ve stood a chance… It was almost funny. If their assassination attempt hadn’t been so successful, they might’ve stood a chance.

“So he’s the one they’re after.” Karasuma looked over at Korosensei.

Korosensei finally spoke up. “There _is_ a way”

“Korosensei? All set.” Ritsu announced. Had they secretly been working on something all this time?

“It looks like Ritsu’s completed the prep work I asked her to.” He announced. “I need the healthy students to come here. Wear something you can get dirty.”

It really did seem like they were going to go through with it, when Korosensei instructed Karasuma to call for transport. Nobody bothered to change, and Korosensei didn’t go any deeper into whatever he was planning, so they remained sitting there, waiting for the cars to arrive. When they did, Nagisa almost didn’t want to leave. It was the only way to save their friends, though. At least, that’s what he told himself for the silent drive up the mountain.

The cars finally came to a stop about three quarters of the way up the tall mountain. They could clearly see the hotel, which was shaped a lot like a cone, looming over them at the top. Blocking it was a sheer cliff face.

 “It’s so high…” Kimura said.

“I infiltrated the hotel’s computers and got schematics of the interior – complete with guard locations.” Ritsu announced. “A large number of guards are stationed at and around the main entrance. It’s not possible to enter the hotel without going past the front desk. However, there is an entry way on this side, atop the ledge. The terrain is impassable, and there are no guards posted there.”

So the plan was for them to climb that thing?!

Korosensei confirmed it. “If you don’t want the enemy to get his way… there’s just one thing to do! Not counting the ten patients and the two left behind to care for them, all capable students must sneak in from here, get the jump on the guys at the top, and steal that remedy!”

“It’s too dangerous!” Karasuma immediately said. “The ease with which he threatened us indicates we’re up against a real pro.”  

“Yes. Perhaps it would be wisest simply to hand me over. What do you think? It’s up to all of you.”

Bitch Sensei looked at the cliff face. “They’ll plummet to their deaths before they reach the hotel.”

Nagisa wasn’t sure. It didn’t look significantly harder than anything they’d done in training. Karasuma had made them climb the cliffs around school for hours on end. Nobody’s technique was weak anymore. He was pretty sure he could climb that thing without falling at the very least.

“Nagisa kun, Kayano chan... I’m sorry, but-“ Karasuma started.

The rest of their squad seemed to agree, Isogai taking the lead as he began to test out climbing the cliff face. When the ease of which he was doing so became clear, Nagisa was more than confident they could do it. He joined the rest of the class, taking a good hold of the rock.

“Well, I mean, if the ledge is a problem this part’s a piece of cake, especially compared to our usual training.” Isogai said. “Right? But we haven’t practised fighting an unknown foe in an unknown hotel, so, Karasuma Sensei, it won’t be easy, but could you be out commander?”

“We’ll make that jerk pay for messing with us!” Terasaka called out.

Something went over Karasuma’s face, before nodding. “Attention! Our objective is the top floor of the hotel at the summit! Our mission will shift from a stealth infiltration to a surprise attack! We’ll use the same hand signals and link ups from training! The only difference is our target! You have three minutes to memorise the map. We begin at 21:50!”

“Right!” They all called.

Remembering his training on the mountain as best he could, Nagisa remembered his balance and hauled himself up as best he could. It was a little more difficult than he remembered, though the last time he’d done this, he probably weighed a little less. He was being more careful than he usually was too, perhaps out of some instinct. His arms were getting so tired.

“Karma kun! Wait!” Nagisa called out. It was what Karasuma had always instructed them to do during training, at least in first. They paired up, in case one was in trouble and needed to help the other. Of course Karma had ended up as Nagisa’s partner, way back then.

“I’d like to,” Karma turned, “but we’re kind of on a schedule here.”

“You’re right,” Nagisa said, continuing to climb. “Let’s do this.”

He was not going to fall into the trap of being some weak and useless omega who had to rely on an alpha for everything short of breathing. Nagisa was different from that, he had to be, no matter the circumstances. In this fight, he had something he was desperate to prove.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All kudos and comments give me life :D


	11. Mission Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The students continue their assault on the resort

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, sorry for lack of non canon content. I promise you only have to put up with another half chapter of it - I just thought this arc was too important to skip over, and would have made the story as a whole feel incomplete. As promised, I'll be uploading as quick as I can to get to the more interesting stuff ^_^ Happy reading!

Putting all they’d learnt into the real world was a lot harder than it originally sounded. Although Nagisa had fought Takaoka before, he had been trying to prove a point rather than seriously intending to harm Nagisa. These real, professional assassins were _tough_ , so tough that when they’d faced the poisoner, Karasuma himself had been incapacitated, and was having to be tugged around by Isogai.

Just around the corner from the place they were standing was, if Nagisa was guessing right, another professional assassin. They had made it all the way up to the fifth floor walk way, before their path was blocked by a tall, blond man. There was something in his stance that said he was ready to fight, but it was so subtle… He was definitely a pro

 “Hey, why’s he just standing there in the open like that?” Yoshida whispered.

Yada looked almost as if she was scanning him in concentration. “That vibe he’s giving off…”  

“Oh, yeah, I can totally call it now,” Yoshida realised. “If it’s kill or be killed, he’ll kill.”

Moving lightning fast, the man slammed his first into one of the windows, causing it to crack around his hand. He didn’t seem fazed by this, standing to attention as if to greet them. “What a drag, hm. If I can hear your footsteps, you’re not tough enough for me, hm. Supposedly some special forces teacher was taking the lead too, hm. I guess Smog’s gas must’ve gotten the better of him, hm. Probably killed each other at the same time, hm. Come on out, hm.

Even though he was a professional assassin, clearly, Nagisa felt no fear. In fact, there was something odd about him, like an itch Nagisa wasn’t sure of the location of.

“You say ‘hm’ a lot, old man.” Karma stepped forwards, fairly so since he clearly knew their location.

Ah, there it was. The rest of them stepped forwards, since there was no real advantage to hiding their numbers right then.

He shrugged. “I heard it would make me sound more like a samurai, hm. It’s got a cool ring to it, so I’m trying it out, hm. Maybe I’m wrong, but I don’t mind, hm. After I kill you all here, I can drop the ‘hm’ with no loss of face, hm.”

From Nagisa’s hands, Korosensei joined the conversation. “Bare hands… are those your killing tools, then?”

“There’s actually quite a demand for this, hm. Passing through pat-downs has its distinct advantage, hm. Once they come closer, I snap their necks, hm. Or, if I feel like it, I could crush their skulls, hm.” He flexed his wrists in demonstration. “You know, it’s funny, hm. The more you train your strength for killing people, hm, the more you feel like using it for something else, hm. A fight, to be precise, hm. Against a might foe – to the death, hm. But what a let-down, hm. Seeing who I’m up against, I’ve all but lost my will to fight, hm. Plus, it’s a pain killing a bunch of small fry by myself, hm. I’ll call in my boss and my colleague to kill you together, hm.”

He took out a large walkie-talkie, but before he could contact anybody, Karma was moving. With a speed only Karma could manage right there on the spot, he grabbed a hold of one of the decorative plant pots that were lining the walkway, swinging it around like a baseball bat to hit the device right into the window, next to the punch shatter.

“Hey, old man, hm.” He said confidently. “You’re pretty average for a pro, aren’t you? Breaking glass, busting skulls? I can do that too. But if your opening move is to call in reinforcements, maybe you’re too scared to take on a junior-high kid alone.”

Nagisa could sense that the rest of their group was unnerved by Karma’s taunts, but he could sense a different kind of energy from Karma. He’d seen him fight many times in the past, back when they were twelve and in Class D together. That was rash, mostly unplanned violence he used to get his way. Right then, Karma’s entire presence wasn’t fully dark.  

“No! Don’t be reckless!” Karasuma yelled.

“Stop right there, Karasuma Sensei,” Korosensei said. “His chin is down. So far he’s been showing off his swagger with his chin in the air, looking down on his opponents. But this is different. His words may be as rough as ever… but his eyes are looking straight ahead, alert, observing his foe head on. He’s been lying low ever since finals, but it seems he’s learned well from his failures.”

The pro shrugged off his jacket. “Alright, hm. Let’s see what you can do, hm.”

“Give this everything you’ve got,” Korosensei warned. “You’re facing one high wall: an adult!”

If Karma took the advice in, he didn’t show it. “If you insist…” With his hands still gripping the plant pot, he charged forwards with it, but the assassin gripped it with ease. Knowing Karma, that definitely wasn’t everything the alpha had planned. You could practically hear the gears of his mind spinning.

“Too soft, hm. You’ll have to find a better weapon, hm.” With ease, the assassin snapped the plant in half.

“Don’t need one,” Karma said casually, and moved out of the way of the assassin’s lunge. The fight was a blur, with the assassin trying to get his hands on Karma, and Karma avoiding each potential blow with expert precision. He was light and steady on his feet, concentrating fully on his opponent. A part of Nagisa swelled up, in something almost like proud. There’d been a change in him, somewhere.

“Wow… he’s dodging or blocking every blow!” Kayano commented beside Nagisa.

Korosensei hummed. “That’s your defence technique, right, Karasuma Sensei?”

Of course, he must have picked it up in practise. Karma tended to skip many of their extra sessions, and indeed also the mandatory ones, with the excuse he didn’t need it. He’d definitely picked up a lot from it, though, even if he didn’t realise.

“What’s wrong, hm?” The assassin halted his advance. “You’ll never get past me if you don’t attack, hm!”

“You think?” Karma said knowingly. “I mean, I could be doing my best to distract you while the rest of us slip past a few at a time. Relax. No underhanded hijinks here. Now… it’s my turn.” He cracked his knuckles, and got into an offensive position. “Barehanded, like you. We’ll settle this fair and square, man-to-man.”

The assassin looked him over. “I like that face of yours, young warrior, hm. With you, I’ve got a chance- a chance of a fair fight I can’t experience in the assassination business, hm.”

This time, as the fight resumed, Karma did indeed do his best job at attacking. They moved together in a blur, though Nagisa did manage to notice how Karma favoured swift kicks and slashes, whereas the assassin was trying to get his fists on him. Surprisingly, the fight was pretty equal, until the assassin was knocked back onto his knee. Nagisa’s heart jumped in his throat. Was Karma really going to win so clearly? Even before Karma advanced, Nagisa sensed the darkness form. Sure enough, the assassin pulled out an aerosol can – the same as Smog had used earlier, and sprayed it right at Karma, causing him to fall to his knees.

“It’s over, hm,” the assassin said, gripping his hair. Nagisa had to bite the inside of his cheeks. If the man was serious, Karma could really _die._

“That’s dirty! There’s nothing fair about sneaking that into a fight!” Yoshida called out.

“I never said I fight only barehanded, hm.” He yanked Karma up by the head. “One musn’t get too particular about ones hangups, hm. Just another key to sticking around in this business, hm. A spray of gas at point blank range, hm… You’ll never defend against it if you don’t see it com-”

He was cut off by the same spray, coming from Karma’s own hand, still perfectly mobile.

The assassin stumbled back. “Wh-what have you=”

“What a coincidence!” Karma said easily, completely unscathed. “We were both thinking the same thing!

“How… did you… get that… hm….? And how… did you not… breathe my gas… hm?”

The assassin made a final stand, charging clumsily towards him with a knife he’d pulled out of his jacket, but Karma easily grabbed him by the arm, flipping and pinning him onto the floor.

“C’mon Terasaka!” He called.  “Quickly, quickly! We’ll need duct tape and sheer numbers to beat this monster!”

“Yeah, I’m on it,” Terasaka replied, pulling a bag out of his own backpack. “The promise of a barehanded, one on one fight? It was bullshit from the word ‘go’!”

Following the instruction, and coming out of his stunned state, Nagisa followed the rest of their group to help pin the assassin’s body, still struggling against the gas, firmly to the ground. As they prevented him from moving, Karma swiftly moved around him with the tape, fastening his limbs together.

“Careful taping him up.” Karasuma instructed. “With his superhuman strength, you’ve got to be cautious even though he’s paralysed.” Karasuma

Karma admired their handy work.“I filched an unused cartridge from that poisoner guy. It’s so handy, I wish it weren’t a one time use kind of thing.”

“How, hm… did you see my gas attack coming, hm?” The assassin choked out. “Is that why you didn’t breathe any in, hm? But I only showed you my bare hands, hm… How, hm?”

“Isn’t it obvious?” Karma replied. “I was on guard against everything _but_ bare hands. I’m sure you really did want a barehanded bout… but you would have had to stop us by any means necessary, and if I were you, I would have done the same.” He lowered himself, sitting cross legged in front of the assassin. “I trusted your attitude as a pro… and that’s why I was on guard.”

There was something much more mature in Karma’s entire demeanour, like he’d somehow changed for the better. To his horror, Nagisa realised his throat had gone bone dry, and there was a weird itch in his neck. He shifted uncomfortably as quiet, glancing thoughts filled the back of his mind. _Strong alpha_ , they whispered, _he can protect you, **your** alpha_. Nagisa almost wanted to scream to drown them out. It was just some kind of hormonal thing. Just hormones, that’s-

“Karma kun had never known great defeat,” Korosensei interrupted his train of thought, “but those midterm exams taught him all too well: losers are people just like you who live their lives thinking about all sorts of things. Once you realise that, you inevitably find you can no longer make light of your opponent on the battlefield. You can see if your foe is thinking like you, trying hard like you. You come to see their abilities, their circumstances. Someone who can be respectfully wary of their opponent… That person has no chinks on the battlefield. You grew so much from that one defeat. You’ll make a name for yourself one day. ”

The assassin seemed to agree. “You’re nothing to sneeze at, young warrior, hm. I may have lost, but I enjoyed our time togeth-”

Before he could finish, Karma dug around in the bag Terasaka had provided him, producing two tubes. “What are you talking about? The fun’s just beginning!”

“What the hell is that, hm?”

“Wasabi and mustard. I’m going to put them in your nostrils. I’d been on guard around you all this time, but now that you’re tied up, what’s the point? Once these are in, I’ll plug your nose with a special clip, stuff your mouth with ghost peppers – a thousand times hotter than average chillies – then, to top all of that, I’ll gag you. Done and done! Okay, old man hm? Now’s the time to show your willpower as a pro, hm.”

Nagisa swallowed. “Korosensei, Karma kun hasn’t really changed all that much, has he?”

“No, he hasn’t. I’m concerned for his future.” Korosensei agreed.

“What the hell did you bring with you, anyway?” Terasaka asked, as Karma finished up torturing their opponent.  “Hey, let’s get going! Keep dragging our feet and they’ll find us!” Terasaka.

“They’ll find _you_ ,” Karma said, finally turning his attention away, “you Big Hulk.”

“Shut it!” Terasaka complained, practically dragging him away.

Though they kept their stealth up, there were no other secret assassins poised to try and defeat them for a little while, as they followed the map Ritsu had set out. Thankfully, the guy hadn’t had time to call for reinforcements, and had in fact given away that more did exist. The only thing they could hope for was a smooth ascent the rest of the way, although it was unlikely.

“Okay, everyone,” Ritsu announced as they reached a staircase. “The terrace is upstairs.”

“The bar floor,” Hayami said. “That could be tricky.”

“Yes,” Ritsu confirmed. “There’s a stairway to the VIP floor inside a lounge here. The back entrance is locked; we’ll have to come in through the longue to unlock it.”

Isogai looked up towards the doors, where music was booming. “We really stand out, you guys.”

“Let’s have the teachers hide here. We’ll sneak into the lounge and unlock the back entrance. We girls won’t look suspicious alone in a place like this.“ Kataoka suggested.

Karasuma shook his head. “No. It’s girls going alone that makes it dangerous.”

“Oh! In that case…” Karma shot Nagisa an oddly suggestive look.  

“Huh?” Nagisa voiced his confusion, the rest of the group looking at him.

“It’s just,” Kataoka looked him over, “if any of the boys stand a chance of getting in, it’s you, Nagisa kun.”

He still didn’t understand exactly what they meant, but he was frightened to ask.

“If Nagisa kun is okay with it,” Karasuma said, “I approve of the mission.”

“Come on, Nagisa kun!” Yada said cheerfully. “You wan’t to help in the assassination, don’t you?”

He gave in. “F-fine.”

“Great! Now go get changed, snappish!”

As soon as they’d said it, Hayami swiftly pressed a pile of folded clothes into Nagisa’s arms, pushing him off into the first room that was unlocked. It didn’t seem like anybody was currently staying in there, due to a total lack of bags. Looking at the clothes he’d been provided made Nagisa want to cry, but he’d already agreed to it, and had no choice but to slip them on.

It wasn’t uncommon for male omegas to choose to dress in the feminine way. Not that he really knew any others, but he’d definitely seen it in the media. At the Junior High stage, any segregation was based on the primary gender alone, but after that, if you were an omega you were essentially a girl in official eyes. Even the thought made Nagisa squirm.

His mother had forced him to wear dresses before, but none were as promiscuous as this. When he looked begrudgingly in the mirror, it definitely wouldn’t do. At the moment, Nagisa’s t shirts fit loosely enough to mostly hide the curve of his stomach, but this top was so tight that if anything, it _highlighted_ it. Never mind the skirt, he couldn’t be seen like that. The best option, he decided, was to suck his stomach in as far as he could, tugging the material up and over the bump. With the way it flared out, it disguised his stomach, but to the disadvantage that it showed an _indecent_ amount of thigh.

Stuck between a rock and a hard place, Nagisa left it like that, and finally went outside to join the rest of the group again. The stares bore into his skin, and he just wanted to run away and hide.

“Can we just go?”

They nodded, and entered the longue. Club music was blaring as people either danced along to it, or hung out at the side lines. Nobody was giving them a second glance, at the very least. Hopefully this mission would be over in the matter of minutes. All he had to do was hide behind the girls, and nobody would even see him.

“C’mon! Get out in front and protect us, Nagisa kun!” Kataoka said, pushing him forwards.

“I can’t! I can’t be out in front!” Nagisa panicked.  

“Give it up,” Kataoka continued, “go on!”

“Why _me_?”

“We’d like a guy around, but in places like this they check guys real carefully.” She replied.

“Yeah, but even so-“

“It’s all part of the plan!” Fuwa cut in.

“ _Really_?”

“Yes, really!” Ritsu agreed.

“Not you too!”

Hayami crossed her arms. “You’re acting too normal. It’s not fresh enough.”

“But that’s not what I’m looking for! Where did you find these clothes, anyway?”

“Cast off beside the outside pool,” she responded, casually.

Nagisa couldn’t help but shudder. What if they were diseased, or something? After this was all over, he was going to have a two hour bath, definitely.  

“Ugh let’s get out of this filthy place ASAP!” Fuwa said.

Nagisa’s eyes narrowed. “And yet you seem to be enjoying yourself, Fuwa san.”

A tap on his shoulder made him jump, as he turned to face a guy of around their same age. “Hey! Where’d _you_ come from? How about a drink – anything you like, it’s on me!”

Oh, god. That had definitely not been a part of the plan, or what he’d agreed to.

“Go ahead, Nagisa! Keep him company!” Kataoka took any choice away, pushing him towards the boy.

“But, Kataoka san…” Nagisa complained lowly.

She grabbed his shoulder, whispering into his ear. “We have to act normal, remember? We’ll come get you if anything happens.”

How did it come to this?

“Oh! So you’re Nagisa chan! I’m Yuji.” The boy introduced, a hand on Nagisa’s back steering him towards the bar. “Is there anything you like?”

Nagisa didn’t know what to do in a situation just like this. “Uh…”

“No worries, I’ll order for you,” he turned to the bartender, rattling off the name of some drink Nagisa had never heard of. From the smell of it once it was placed in his hand, it was most definitely alcoholic. “C’mon, drink up! I’m paying! We’ll do it up big tonight, anything for a nice omega like you!”

“N-no! I…I can’t drink.” Nagisa excused. He couldn’t anyway, due to his doctor’s warnings, but he was never drinking alcohol in his life again. All it had gotten him in was this huge mess. His mind turned to Yuji’s comment. Omega? Nagisa realised, with a small amount of horror, that in the rush of the assassination and then their infiltration, he’d forgotten to apply any of that scent blocker stuff. It hadn’t seemed to be an issue before, but he must be producing some kind of scent.

The more natural he acted, the better. “Um, Yuji kun? Are you here with your parents?” Nagisa decided to ask, as Yuji downed his own drink.  

“My parents? Like they have the time! This is just between us, but my old man, he’s a famous TV personality.” He announced, excitedly. “You know him, believe me! He’s such a big deal, he can get away with anything. He was bragging about squeezing this omega woman announcer’s ass for twenty four hours straight!”

That sounded gross. “Does your dad have some kind of grudge against asses or something?”

Yuji looked away, as if he’d run out of any kind of reply, and pulled out a cigarette looking thing. There was an odd smell coming from it, though, causing Nagisa to wrinkle his nose.

“That’s… not a regular cigarette, is it?”

“Yeah. I just got into it. At my age, if you know about these, you’re cool.”

Nagisa reached over, inspecting it closely. He wasn’t sure he had any grounds to lecture people on what they did with their lives, given his own situation, but he couldn’t help but feel bad for the guy. “Our teacher said he doesn’t know if smoking those will make you look cool, but it definitely makes your life harder.”

“Life’s _already_ hard for us betas!” He slammed a fist on the table. “We gotta force ourselves to try and look cool! It’s worse for me, always getting compared to my old man. You’ve got it made… All you have to do is pick a cool guy”

“Uh… yeah…” Nagisa looked away from him. If only his life were that easy.

“Nagisa!” Kayano called out, across the room.  

“Kayano!” Her coming to get him could mean danger, but Nagisa was overjoyed he was allowed to leave. “Oh, um… I gotta go,” he excused.

“What? Already?” Yuji looked up.  

“Bye now!” Nagisa said quickly, going over to Kayano’s side. The girls didn’t seem to be in too much danger, at the very least, and were waiting by the balcony door. “Don’t leave me alone like that!”

“Sorry! We hammered out a stratergy!” Kataoka said, like that had been the plan all along.

“Great,” Nagisa responded genuinely. “I can’t wait to get out of these clothes.”

“Hey, wait up! Ladies!” Nagisa turned, to see Yuji had followed them. “As a special treat, check out my signature dance moves!”

The display was awful. Even if he’d actually been a good dancer, the moves were so try-hard Nagisa just wanted it to end. That’s all he seemed to be – try hard. It was a little sad, really. Maybe if Yuji learnt to be more comfortable on his own two feet, he could be a genuinely nice guy. His moves grew too frantic, though, and he knocked a drink out of a taller man’s hand, spilling it all over his jacket.

“Hey brat, tough guy, eh?” The man approached.

“N-no, I-“

“Get over here!” He grabbed Yuji by the shirt.  

Yuji trembled. “I didn’t mean to…”

“This is a million yen jacket. I demand compensation. Your address, now! Add on pain and suffering, and that’s three million total. Pay up now and we’ll only leave you half dead.”

“What?! M-my father will pay! Please don’t beat me up!”

“Excuse me, Yakuza San?” Okano stepped up, with apparently some pity.

“Yeah?”

Expertly, she flipped, kicking him back so he was knocked out in one blow. Nagisa was sure that if Karasuma had been there to see it, he would have been proud of how flawlessly she’d pulled off the technique.

“Excuse me, sir?” Yada asked one of the men guarding the door. “That customer just suddenly collapsed. Take him out of here and get him checked out.”  

“Oh yes. Sorry for the bother.” He left his post, and seeing their chance, some of the girls ran through the open door.

“Back to the dance floor with you!” Yada said kindly to Yuji. “And don’t tell anyone about this, okay?”  

“Even when girls pull off something so effortlessly cool,” Nagisa said, his eyes following them, “you still have to chin up and act cool… It _is_ hard.”

“Nagisa chan…” Yuji looked up at him.

He sighed. “If we meet again, keep acting cool, okay? Anything but drugs and dancing… if you can help it.”

Joining them, he ran around the back of the longue, unlocking the door so the rest of their group could come through. The second it was unlocked, Nagisa slipped away, this time finding a cleaning cupboard to change in. Once his regular clothes were touching his skin again, he felt infinitely more comfortable. It wasn’t like he’d done much, anyway.

“Wow, you sure got changed fast, Nagisa,” Kayano said, once he’d returned.  

“Yeah.” Nagisa looked down.

“Hmm? What’s wrong?” Kayano asked.

“It’s just… You girls did everything this time around. What was even the point of me being in this get up?”

Karma quickly cut in, holding up his phone to display a photo of Nagisa in the outfit. “Comic relief, duh!”

“Don’t you dare Karma kun!” It was how he’d used to tease Nagisa before all this mess had started, strangely familiar. As he reached for the phone, Karma laughed, holding it above his head and out of his reach. It didn’t bother him that much, really. In a sense, the normalcy of it was refreshing. Perhaps they still had hope, somehow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, I appreciate comments and kudos. Next chapter, which I hope to upload ASAP, the big fight


	12. Fight Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nagisa faces his enemy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally, this arc is over. Thanks for bearing with it! I know it still follows the anime pretty close for a part of it, but I was super happy with how it turned out in the end!

Finally, after fighting one final assassin, they’d made it to their destination – the top floor of the resort. Nagisa was exhausted from their previous encounters, but now they were so close, the desire to protect his friends won out. The room was just a pretty nice looking suite, save for the multi-monitor set up on the desk, and what looked like a bomb beside the chair. Karasuma signalled them, and they approached silently, as they’d practised before.

They made it very close to the man in the chair, before he let out a deep breath. “Itchy. The very memory makes me itch. But maybe that’s why my senses have grown so much keener: because my wounds are always exposed to the air.” He tossed a variety of detonator remotes up into the air, causing them to fall around the room. “I told you, I’d come prepared to kill a Mach 20 monster. I have spare detonator remotes in case one is snatched away at high speed. Enough to press any one of them if I happen to collapse.”

Nagisa had definitely heard that voice before, but this time it was much more sinister.

“Of the people I couldn’t reach, there were three assassins and one other.” Karasuma said, fully recovered and holding a gun. “An insider who vanished with Ministry of Defence secret service funds and the assassination budget. What do you think you’re doing, Takaoka?”

Takaoka, the man Nagisa had faced before, stood up. “What naughty children. Coming in the back door to see your dear teacher? That’s not how your good old dad raised you. Ah, well, I’ll have to give you some summertime tutoring.” He kept scratching at his cheeks, where there were already exposed wounds and scars.  “Shall we go to the roof?” He picked up the bomb. “I’ve got everything ready to welcome my beloved students. You’ll follow me up there, right? After all, your class is only alive thanks to my benevolence.”

They didn’t really have much of a choice but to follow him. Though highly on guard, the class trailed behind their old ‘teacher’, until they met the warm summer air. There didn’t seem to be anything suspicious going on, so they could probably rule out any kind of ambush. It just looked like a regular roof, albeit with a helipad in the centre.

“Hiring assassins, threatening students with a virus – such atrocities… Have you gone mad?” Karasuma said, glaring at Takaoka.

“Now, now, I am exceedingly sane! This plan will save the world!” He responded, not sounding sane. “If only you’d sent those two small ones along to bring me the one with the bounty, my assassination plan would’ve gone off without a hitch. See, my plan would have used the… what’s her name? Kayano? The girl. The bathtub in my room here is filled with anti-Sensei BB’s. I’d have her go in there holding the target. Then I’d bury them alive in cement. For him to return to his usual form without touching those BB’s, he would have to blow everything up, including his student. But he cares too much for his students to do anything heartless! So I figure he’d just do me a favour and melt away! It gave me a fright when I learned you all came here together, but it doesn’t much change what I have to do. My mood will determine how many of you leave here alive.”

He was talking far more like a sadistic monster than a real human.

“Do you think you can get away with this?” Korosensei asked.

He laughed. “It’s the more humane route… compared to the inhumane way you’ve treated me! Their humiliating glances and the knife you tricked me with… Whenever they cross my mind, my face gets so itchy I can’t even sleep at night! I’ll pay back my bad evaluations with results. I’ll take the humiliation I suffered and give it back in spades! You in particular, Shiota Nagisa. I will _never_ forgive you for spoiling my future.”

Nagisa felt very exposed all of a sudden, as all eyes turned towards him. Did that mean that this whole thing was his fault? If they failed, the lives of his friends would be blood on his hands. He would be responsible. Nagisa couldn’t let that happen.

Chiba cut his thoughts off. “So in asking for the shortest students, he was going after Nagisa.”

“A completely unjustified grudge!” Yoshida agreed.

“Huh,” Karma stepped forwards, “you wanted Nagisa kun here so you could settle the score? Would that make you happy, beating him? Given the size difference? I could show you a much better time.” There was the same kind of taunt in his tone, but something in it made Nagisa wonder if it was Karma’s efforts to protect him.

“You’re nuts.” Terasaska bit out. “You only lost to Nagisa by your own damn rules! Listen, whether you’d won or lost back then, we’d still hate your guts!”

It had at least agitated Takaoka. “I don’t remember asking for you blockheads’ opinions! Don’t forget I can get rid of half of you with just one finger!” He’d begun to scream. “You. Shrimp. Come upstairs alone. To the heliport.”

“Nagisa! You can’t!” Kayano called out.

Their blood would be on his hands. Nagisa handed Korosensei over. “I don’t want to… but I will”

“You can’t,” Karma said, panic evident in his tone as he grabbed Nagisa’s wrist in a vice. “It’s too dangerous for you.” 

He was doing it again, the control he’d placed on Nagisa a few months ago, in order to prevent him from helping with Terasaka’s assassination plan. Nagisa could feel it in the air, the toxicity of the pheromones attempting to wrap around his senses, compelling him to remain still and paralysed. It was so unnatural for Nagisa to close his eyes, but he forced himself, remembering everything he’d learnt.

* * *

 

_“I can’t believe I agreed to this,” Asano complained, sitting opposite Nagisa, cross legged on the bed._

_“Please,” Nagisa asked softly. “I really need to practise, and I don’t know many other alphas.”_

_The alpha rolled his eyes, but then focused on maintaining eye contact. It was much slower than it had been the first time Nagisa had experienced the sensation. Before, it had been as if Karma was yanking the ground out from under him, more powerful, like the snap of a whip. With the way Asano’s pheromones filled the air, it was more like a slow lull._

_“Nagisa kun,” he said steadily, “nod your head for me.”_

_It wasn’t the same as when Karma had commanded him, but that didn’t stop the static buzz at the back of his head. It accepted Asano’s words, making him sway forwards. He wanted to do as the alpha pleased, wanted to fulfil the command. Nagisa nodded._

_Almost instantly, it was ripped away, making Nagisa feel cold. “You’re not even trying.”_

_“I’m sorry,” it felt weirdly exposing._

_There was a fire set in Asano’s usually cold eyes. “Alright, Nagisa kun. We’ll do it again.”_

_“Okay.”_

* * *

 

Yeah, that was right. Nagisa didn’t need to listen to Karma. He wasn’t his alpha, and even if he was, even Nagisa’s omega nature didn’t mean he had to do what he said. This mission was more important than Karma’s will, more important than the potential danger. He broke out of Karma’s grip, and any mental hold Karma had over him fractured, causing his eyes to go wide.

“He’s so agitated, who knows what he’ll do,” Nagisa stepped towards the helipad. “I’ll hear him out, talk him down, and get him to hand over the remedy in one piece.”

With no other protests, he climbed the stairs, getting up onto the pad where Takaoka clearly wanted him. He was waiting there, staring at Nagisa like his next meal. Nagisa couldn’t help but feel a little sick, once he noticed the knife laid out for him. It really did seem like Takaoka wanted a rematch.  

“Oh – don’t take this the wrong way,” Takaoka announced to the rest of their group. “I don’t want you interrupting my precious time with Shiota Nagisa.” In one swift movement, he pressed one of the detonator remotes, blowing up all possible exits to the helipad. Nagisa was trapped there.  “Now no one else can come up here. Do you understand what I’m trying to do? This is revenge for our earlier fight.”

“Wait, please, Takaoka Sensei,” Nagisa tried desperately, “I didn’t come here to fight.”

“I’m sure. Those dirty tricks won’t work anymore. I can see myself doing you in, quickly, just like that. But it’ll be over too soon to make me feel any better. So before we fight, there’s something I need you to do. Apologise. On your hands and knees. Atone wholeheartedly for having pulled a dirty sneak attack because you lack any real skill.”

He had to, for his friends. Nagisa lowered himself so he was kneeling. “I-“

“You call that on your hands and knees, you rotten brat?! Head on the ground!”

 Nagisa’s eyes fell on the bomb containing the remedy. He could get this out. Shaking slight, Nagisa put his head to the ground. “I have no real skill, so I pulled a dirty sneak attack. I’m sorry.”

He flinched when Takoaka dug his boot onto his head. “Oh, and after that you talked back to me, told me to get out. Is that any way for a brat like you to talk to an adult? Is that any way for a student to talk to his teacher?!”

“I’m just a brat and a student, and it was wrong for me to talk back to an adult, a teacher. I’m very sorry.”

“Now you’re speaking from the heart. Your dear old dad is so pleased!” He let Nagisa up, though he remained on his knees. “As a reward, I’ll let you in on a little something. I asked Smog what happens to the people who die from that virus. He showed me some pictures. What a laugh! Their bodies, covered in boils! Faces like bunches of grapes! Wouldn’t you like to see that, Nagisa kun?”

Before Nagisa even had time to react, Takoaka picked up the bomb and threw it far away, pressing the detonator once again. It, and the cure within, exploded. Just like that. In the matter of a second, all of this had been for nothing. He’d just signed everyone’s death sentences. It must have shown on Nagisa’s face, because Takoaka begun to laugh like a madman.

“Yes! That’s the face I wanted to see! You ought to put it in your summer diary – your friends’ faces, bubbling up like so many grapes!”

Nagisa’s hands folded around himself. Unlike when he usually placed his hands on his stomach, as he’d found himself doing a lot recently, it didn’t calm him down. Nowhere within him was the urge to cry. No, all Nagisa felt was sickening rage. It was if Nagisa couldn’t even see. He could have been in a pitch black room, for all that it mattered. There was nothing, just Takoaka. Just his target, and him.

It was said that violence was against an omega’s nature. Even Lovro, a true professional and expert in killing, had told him so. By all means, Nagisa should be shying away, crying and begging. There was nothing, nothing but cold. His eyes were fixed to the ground, and then they raked up to the knife. The blade looked sharp, lethal with its cool metal. Nagisa reached out for it, feeling its weight and the steel on his fingertips.

“I’ll… kill you…”

He would use the blade to kill his target. Nagisa pictured it, driving it into the man’s chest. Or maybe he wouldn’t go for the quick kill. If he could get the right angle, perhaps a slash to the throat. It wouldn’t even be that hard. Nagisa wanted it, wanted Takoaka’s blood to paint the plains of his skin crimson.

“That’s right… that’s the way.”

The voice caused Nagisa’s eyes to snap up to meet Takoaka’s. Maybe he’d carve those demon eyes out and keep them as a reminder. There was nothing left now there was no hope. The only thing Nagisa could do was make him pay for the lives of his friends. He owed it to them, to himself. He was going to kill Takaoka, and he was going to make it hurt.

“I’ll kill you… for what you did to them,” he pulled himself to his feet.  

“That’s the spirit!” Takoaka goaded. “Come and kill me, Nagisa kun!”

Oh, he would kill him. He’d kill him so bad that before he was done, Takaoka would be begging for his own death. Before Nagisa could advance, something hit him in the back, _hard_. He turned naturally, realising the object was Terasaka’s stun gun.

 “Don’t be getting cocky Nagisa!” He called out. “Quit worrying about other people, you damn wimp. This virus will go away by itself with a good night’s sleep! Murder is murder, even with a piece of trash like that! You gonna give into the crazy, and throw your chance at ten billion out of the window?”

“Terasaka’s right, Nagisa kun,” Korosensei also called. “Killing him isn’t worth it, and being in a blind rage will only work against you. Besides, he doesn’t know anything about the remedy. We’ll ask the poisoner downstairs. Just knock this one out; that’s enough.”

Takaoka stopped laughing, and scream shouted. “Hey, now, quit being a wet blanket! Unless he comes at me with a real intent to kill, what’s the point? I’ll use this squirt’s bloodlust for revenge in a most humiliating way, and finally my own shame will disappear.”

“Nagisa kun,” Korosensei’s voice was level, as if he was teaching him math, “take Terasaka’s stun gun. His life and my life. His words and Terasaka kun’s words. Think carefully, now. Which are worthy?”

Nagisa… suddenly didn’t know what to do, what he wanted. The blood was still appealing, but he bent down, fastening the stun gun in his belt.

“Ooh, don’t you look cool?” Takaoka went back to laughing. “I see you’re determined to use the knife. That’s a relief. Oh, and just so you know, I do have spare vials of that remedy. If you don’t come at me like you mean it, or if your friends get in the way, you can kiss these babies goodbye. Hear that, _Karasuma_? Stay out of this. This stuff takes a good month to make. There’s not enough for everyone, but it is your last hope.”

As best he could, Nagisa got into the correct stance, brandishing the knife. When he approached, though, it wasn’t with as much vigour and confidence as he’d felt just moments ago. No, now he was shaken up by the advice of Terasaka and Korosensei, Nagisa easily missed his blow. It gave Takaoka the opportunity to kick him hard on the chest, knocking him back.

“What’s wrong? Aren’t you going to kill me?”

Nagisa would, he had to. He owed it to avenge his friends, to himself… He attempted to attack again, but Takaoka easily grabbed him by the wrist, knocking him back. Every attempt to fight was almost instantly thwarted, yet every hit from Takaoka landed. Nagisa was left coughing and panting, thrown off and already worn down to the bone.

“Hmm,” he said, making for a kick to Nagisa’s stomach (which he managed to block). “You’re awfully protective of right there.” He held him sickeningly close, making a show of scenting his neck. Nagisa was never forgetting scent blockers again. “How _precious_. Almost enough to make me feel bad.” He kicked him the chest once more, causing Nagisa to fall to his knees. “Hey, don’t be tiring out on me! We’re only just getting started! Looks like it’s time for me to use this, too,” he pulled out a knife. “I’ll cut off your hands and feet, have them stuffed and mounted. I’ll keep them with me and cherish them forever. Nothing better than the prize of a poor, tragic omega to keep with me.”

Shuddering, Nagisa’s mind finally cleared up. He wasn’t in the right state for a kill, not anymore, and now Takaoka had mentioned it, attacking more in this way would only put himself and his baby in more danger. Nagisa had been trained to be an assassin, not a murderer. Besides, he thought, he didn’t particularly want to give birth in prison. It was almost funny, the day he’d defeated Takaoka the first time had been the day he’d been taken to the hospital. He could defeat him again, the same way.

Remembering the technique Lovro had taught him before the trip, Nagisa went through his mental checklist. Takaoka was definitely a professional who knew the fear of death, and, as he stood up again, Nagisa could feel he had the stun gun attached to him, his second blade. Good, that was all three of the conditions. Takaoka was about to become Nagisa’s guinea pig.

“Wh-what are you doing?” Takaoka noticed the shift in his demeanour.

Finally focusing, Nagisa approached as casually as he had before, like he was walking down the street on a perfectly normal day. Takaoka froze, and made no attempt to defend himself as his eyes clearly slid to the knife Nagisa was holding. As soon as he was close enough, Nagisa let it fall to the ground, lunging forwards as he clapped as loud as he could. Just as Lovro had promised, it stunned the man, causing him to stumble back. Before he could come back to his senses, Nagisa swiftly pulled the gun, activating it.

As Takaoka was electrocuted, and fell to his knees, Nagisa realised he’d won. There was no immediate rush of victory, though. No, he still had something to say. After all, this man had taught him what true blood lust felt like. If anything, Nagisa should thank him. He tilted the man’s face up with the gun, forcing him to look him in the eyes.

“No. Just, please, don’t end this with that face! That face will haunt my nightmares until my dying day!”

Nagisa ignored him. “Takaoka sensei, thank you,” he smiled genuinely, before electrocuting him a final time, and Takaoka fainted.

He was vaguely aware of cheering in the background, but Nagisa only really came back around when he felt himself being pulled into a firm hug. He didn’t return it, blinking to look up at Karma’s face. Oh, he wasn’t sure if Karma had ever _hugged_ him before.  

“Nice,” Karma cleared his throat, trying to pass the gesture off.

“Are you okay, Nagisa?” Isogai rushed over to ask.

He felt a little faint. “Yeah…”  

“Well done, Nagisa kun.” Korosensei said from Kayano’s arms. “For the first time, I wasn’t sure how things would turn out. I’m relieved.”

“Yeah, and I’m fine,” Nagisa said, though dizziness was settling in suddenly, “but now what? The remedy we took off Takaoka sensei won’t be enough.”

Karasuma pulled out his phone, dialling something. “Let’s get out of here, at least. I’ve called a helicopter. You wait here. I’ll bring up the poisoner.”

“Ha, you don’t need a remedy,” the group’s attention suddenly went to the other side of the room, where the three assassins they’d defeated were standing, poised for a fight. “You brats thought you could get out of here alive, huh?”

“We’ve defeated the man who hired you,” Karasuma said calmly. “you’re out of reasons to fight. I’ve mostly recovered, and these students are pretty strong. How about we stop now before anyone else gets hurt?”  

“Yeah, okay,” the third one said.  

“You just don’t know when to give up-“ Yoshida started. “Huh, ‘ _okay_ ’?”

“Our contracts don’t cover avenging the boss,” he shrugged. “Besides, it’s like I said, you don’t need a remedy.”

“This here is what I gave you,” the poisoner demonstrated. “An improvement on the food poisoning bug. It’ll keep going strong for another thirty hours or so, but then it’ll lose its oomph, and with it, its poison. Now this is what our boss told us to use. If we’d used this, you’d really be in dire straits.”

“Right before using that virus, we three talked it over, hm,” the second assassin said. “Our boss only gave you one hour, hm. We figured we could do the handover without resorting to a deadly virus, hm.”

“It was enough to make you feel like your lives were in danger, anyway,” the poisoner continued.  

Okano stepped forwards. “So you went against orders? Can you do that when he’s paying you?”

“What are you, stupid?” The third assassin sounded offended. “If you think pros will do anything for money, you have another thing coming. Of course, we’ll do our best to abide by our client’s wishes, but he never had any intention of giving you the remedy. Either we become killers of a bunch of respectable Junior High kids, or we take a hit to our professional standing. We just calmly weighed which option had more risk from here on out.”  

“And that’s why, sorry to say,” the poisoner cut in, “none of you will be dying. Give the patients that supplement and put them to bed, they’ll feel even better than before they were sick.”

“I’ll believe it once I see those students recovered,” Karasuma said carefully, as a government helicopter arrived. “I’ll have to detain you for a while for questioning.”

“Ah, well, you’ve got a week to wind it up before the next job starts,” the third assassin said casually, leading the rest of his group onto it.

With that, it was just their small group left on the rooftop, waiting for the transport back to the hotel. In each passing second, where the weight of everything that had happened set into Nagisa, the adrenaline faded. He was exhausted, so worn down that all he wanted to do was sleep. The more he tried to stand upright, the more he swayed, before everything went blurry, and then completely dark.

When Nagisa stirred, it was still pretty dark out. He was lying down, flat on his back, and looking at a nicely maintained ceiling. Once his brain caught up, Nagisa realised he must have been taken back to the hotel they were staying in. He wasn’t in his own assigned room, but rather some sort of empty reception room, lying on an uncomfortable stretcher. He didn’t feel particularly injured, just a little sore and groggy. Feeling confident he could, he sat up, taking in the room around him properly. There was nobody else there, save for the boy snoozing in the corner. How long had he been out?

“Karma?” Nagisa questioned, tentatively.

Immediately, his eyes flew open. Something seemed to cross Karma’s face, but he resorted to a grin. “Good, you’re awake.”

“What-“

Karma came closer, waving him off. “You passed out before the helicopter came, but the paramedics checked you out and cleared you. Don’t worry, I made sure they wouldn’t _spill_ anything.”

That sounded… threatening. “Spill anything?”

He shrugged. “You’re both just fine. Or alive, at least.”

Oh. Nagisa had been so caught up in the adrenaline of it all that he hadn’t considered whether the baby was okay, once he’d launched his attack on Takaoka, aside from that one glancing thought that had brought him back. That was comforting at least, to know Nagisa hadn’t accidentally harmed it with his actions. Perhaps it would have been easier, though, if the ‘big secret’ had been spilled that way. If Karma said they wouldn’t talk, though, they most definitely wouldn’t. Thinking about it, had Karma stayed by his bedside all night? His eyes bore dark circles that suggested that was the case.

“Just in time,” Karma looked at his phone. “They’re going to start the assassination soon. Want to come to the beach and watch?”

Though he didn’t doubt Karma wouldn’t care too much about the rules, Nagisa was probably deemed healthy enough to carry on as he liked, if he’d been left without any medical supervision. He wouldn’t miss the assassination for the world, after everything.

“Okay.”

They didn’t say much, on their walk down to the beach, though Karma stopped further back from where their friends were also waiting. In the centre of the sea, there was a large metallic structure. If Nagisa had to guess, the government had built it to contain him, filling it with some kind of anti-Sensei material. Perhaps it would work.

“That was some impressive assassination earlier,” Karma finally said, following Nagisa’s eyes to the sunrise.

Nagisa found himself stiffening for a moment, before his shoulders dropped down again. “Mm, it was nothing. Just something Lovro san taught me.”

He sighed. “Do you think the government plan’s going to work?”

It was odd, for Karma. Not the kind of question he’d phrase aloud to Nagisa, of all people. Knowing him, Karma had probably already come up with three loose ideas of what to do when Korosensei inevitably escaped from the holdings. Nagisa felt it though, he knew deep down it wasn’t going to work. Everything felt far _too_ clean and perfectly judged for that. There was no way Karma didn’t sense that too, which lead Nagisa to believe there was something else on the tip of his tongue.

Deciding to indulge him, Nagisa shrugged. “I get the feeling Korosensei will find a way to escape.”

Karma inhaled sharply. “Nagisa kun…”

“Yes, Karma kun?” He couldn’t help but soften a little those rare moments where Karma lost all of his natural charisma. Nagisa turned away from the facility that was holding their teacher, facing him.

His fist clenched. “I’m… sorry.” He paused for a second, as if he was waiting Nagisa to bail him out of the apology. “I know I can’t understand what it’s like to be an omega, but it can’t make it any easier and… Look, I should beat you fair and square, not because you had no _choice_. It’s no excuse, but I just feel this urge to _protect_ , and,” he swallowed, “I should trust you more. Your fight with Takaoka proved that… not that you should have had anything to prove in the first place, but… I’m sorry, Nagisa kun. I swear, I’ll never command you like that again.”

It was a lot to take in. Nagisa had buried much of the emotional impact away, focusing on never letting it happen again. He did believe Karma. It was rare to get a forced apology out of him, let alone an admission that he was actually wrong.

“Where’s this coming from?” He found himself asking

 “Huh?” _Wow_ , he looked vulnerable. “Karasuma sensei spoke to me about it, after they finished checking you over, but,” he clenched his teeth, “I should have known it was wrong on my own.

“It _is_ a lot to forgive you for,” Nagisa realised.

“Please Nagisa kun, accept my apology,” he said once again, genuinely. There was no hint of darkness in his form.

Smiling softly, Nagisa offered his hand. “Okay. I forgive you.” Or at the very least, he’d begin to. He didn’t want to make it too easy, of course.

Karma accepted it, and Nagisa looked down at where their hands were joined, feeling a new sense of peace wash over him. There was no magical fix, but he felt strangely balanced again. They still had a lot of talking to do, of course. Not right then, though. There were more urgent things. Nagisa turned his head to the sunrise.

“It’s a new day, after all,” Nagisa looked out.

A few minutes later, and predictably, Korosensei was free, zooming around the beach at Mach 20 like his old self once again. Nagisa had almost missed the tentacles. There was no disappointment there anymore. They’d just have to assassinate him extra hard, next time.

Karma seemed to share the sentiment, taking the safety off his gun. “Want to take a shot, Nagisa kun?”

“Sure,” Nagisa replied, and followed him further down the beach to join the fire of bullets.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Until next time~


	13. Fireworks Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Summer break comes to an end

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yo, sorry this took so long. As I said, this can finally shift somewhat away from the canon! There's genuinely only like a line or two of canon dialogue, so yay!

Nagisa’s entire existence sucked. It sucked so hard, he could be the king of suck. He really had to stop thinking about sucking, given the situation. The whole ‘glow’ rumour was fake, completely and utterly fake. Nagisa felt gross, sweaty and disgusting. Ever since getting back from the island trip, all he’d wanted to do was hide under the covers and sleep for days on end. The more he slumped around in bed, though, the worse the itch under his skin for a change of scenery became.

He just wasn’t built for laziness. Nagisa needed to go out, do something. Unfortunately, the lack of clothes that fit him was an issue. Most of his clothes had been loose to start with, but in the heat of summer, he was down to one shirt that hid his stomach, and it was starting to get scratchy considering how much he had to wash it.

There was only one day left until they were back at school. He wasn’t sure how effectively he was going to hide it then. Maybe that was the best. Though it was true he didn’t actually know how Karma felt about it, he probably wouldn’t appreciate a massive announcement. If people just _gradually_ realised, surely that would also be okay, right?

They still hadn’t had that conversation yet. It was far, far overdue. At least they weren’t avoiding each other. That had to be some kind of progress. Maybe Karma had something going on, Nagisa was never sure. Though they were on speaking terms, Nagisa hadn’t even seen him for a couple of weeks. He’d have to shortly, in less than twenty four hours. At least they still had another five or so months.

Thinking too hard about Karma wasn’t helping the itch underneath his skin. Nagisa tossed the blanket away from his body, forcing himself to sit up. At the very least, he needed to go for a walk. He was going to die without the sun on his skin, he was sure of it. He stretched out, and picked up his phone for the time.

>> Hey Nagisa, I don’t know if you’re busy today but I’d love to take you out for sushi later, if you want. Please let me know! Love, dad.

Nagisa blinked at the message, reading it over and over. His father hadn’t had much time for him recently. Although his reaction to being put in the E Class wasn’t as strong as his mother’s had been, he had still seemed pretty upset. They hadn’t actually spoken since, rarely did these days. He always claimed to be busy, so Nagisa would feel bad if he said no.

He texted back, and immediately decided that he was going to have to bring a jacket, regardless of the heat. Nagisa had become somewhat of an expert when it came to which angles to stand at and how to cover himself in the right way, recently. Fashion had never been anything he much cared about, but it really did come in handy.

His father greeted him outside the small restaurant, pulling Nagisa into a somewhat awkward hug. Nagisa immediately noticed the tired look about him. Even though he’d been younger at the time, Nagisa had picked up on the way he acted like being a part of their household was a curse. The distance didn’t seem to have fixed that.

He still looked cheerful, enough. “Nagisa! I’m sure you’ve grown!”

Outwards, maybe. Nagisa was more than aware it was just a comment to make him feel better, but he still smiled all the same. “A centimetre or two, I think.”

His father led the way inside. “How’s school treating you?”

“It’s good,” Nagisa replied, though he knew he had to be reserved. They did, after all, have a non-disclosure agreement with the government. “I was nearly in the top thirty at finals.”

“That’s great!” He said, as they took their seats, perhaps just a little too cheerfully. “I’m truly happy for you, Nagisa.”

Nagisa looked over at the sushi whirling around on the conveyor belt. He didn’t know exactly, but he was pretty sure he was meant to be avoiding raw foods. As much as sushi was his favourite food, most of it looked pretty unappealing, anyway. At least the vegetarian options were probably safe. He reached for a few plates, not his regular choice.

“Do you have enough wasabi on that?” his father joked as Nagisa spread out the paste.

Looking down at his dish, Nagisa realised he was definitely right. It didn’t seem bad, though. He tried one of the rolls, finding the spice more appealing than he usually did, despite the burn in his throat. As if he was doing it to prove a point, Nagisa added even more. All he wanted was spicy food, and lots of it.

“It’s really good,” he defended, and continued to eat.

“Are you getting along with your mother alright?”

“…” Nagisa didn’t know what to say. If he was asking that question, then he clearly hadn’t spoken to her. That was probably a good thing.

“Must be hard when she’s so strict,” he continued, “I feel bad for bailing on you.”

It was not the time to open up that can of worms. Nagisa had mostly pushed those issues so far away that they were practically buried. After all, it had in the end been his own choice to stay living with his mother after the divorce, not that it got him particularly far. Still, he didn’t want his father to worry or anything.

“It’s not so bad,” Nagisa lied, “if you don’t get her mad she’s not so strict.”

“I thought sashimi was your favourite,” he changed the subject, once again looking at Nagisa’s plate.

Nagisa swallowed. “I can’t eat it right now,” he said without thinking.

“Why? Is something wrong with you?” He asked with concern.

He really didn’t want to do this. He wanted to crawl right back into that duvet cave and hide. Never in his life did Nagisa envision he’d be having this conversation with his father. Though to be honest, there were _many_ things going on currently that he wouldn’t have imagined in a million years. After all that had happened recently, Nagisa didn’t have much fear.

“I’m pregnant,” Nagisa shrugged, taking a bite of his food.

“Oh,” his father said, “that’s… nice? Congratulations.”

It was better than him yelling and making a scene, Nagisa supposed, though the indifference wasn’t that encouraging either. Though, after a few seconds, he seemed to slowly realise the weight of Nagisa had actually told him, rather than the polite response he probably saved for office assistants or something. Nagisa couldn’t help but attempt to avoid his eyes as his expression slowly morphed.

Before anything could be said, though, a familiar figure appeared on the seat behind him, holding up a sign. Korosensei looked earnest as he always did, though he was wearing his typical disguise reserved for public appearances. He pointed at the sign, which read: ‘Summer Festival! If you’re free at seven tonight, meet at Kunugigaoka Station!’

Well that sounded… fun. A summer festival? Nagisa hadn’t had any plans to go to one, but it would be the trip out that he really needed, perhaps.

Sensing his slight hesitation, Korosensei swiftly took out a marker and scribbled something else: ‘The last day of summer vacation! Let’s hang out and have some mindless fun!’ He darted off at his great speed, leaving Nagisa to stare at the wall.

Nagisa stood up. “Hey, uh, thank you for the sushi, dad!”

“Huh?” He blinked. “You’re already done? Wait, I-“

He didn’t hear whatever his dad had been about to say, already at the exit of the place. The conversation had gone on for long enough, at least. Nagisa didn’t really want to just sit through the awkwardness that was bound to follow, as much as he would always love his father. Besides, he didn’t want to be late.

Asano’s house was actually pretty close to the sushi place, in comparison to where he used to have to come from. Never too careful, Nagisa came in through the back entrance as usual, observing the property quickly before calling out to announce he was back. Nobody responded to him at first, so he assumed Asano was probably holed up in his room. Unlike Nagisa, he seemed to have no issue in remaining within the same four walls for long periods of time.

 _Good_ , Nagisa thought as he checked the time on his phone, _I’m not late after all_. He paced upstairs, though paused opposite the door to the guest room. It still felt wrong to refer to it as ‘his’, on some level. Hesitating, he wasn’t sure if Asano would appreciate him knocking on his bedroom door. Though, he also didn’t seem like the type who would appreciate lateness, either.

It turned out that Nagisa didn’t even have to knock, because Asano pulled the door open before he reached it, wearing the same uninterested face as he usually did.

“Are you just going to stand there?” He asked, leaning against the door frame.

Nagisa blinked. “N-no.”

Asano moved aside. “Come in, then.”

His bedroom was surprisingly the same as the rest of the house, utterly plain. It was meticulously clean, lacking even the smallest speck of dust. If Nagisa didn’t know any better, he would have thought Asano was preparing for a military room inspection or something. He was sure there was more to Asano’s personality than just this, at least.

“This movie had better be good,” he said, sitting back down on the bed where his laptop was out.

Nagisa joined him. “It is, I promise.”

Nothing made him feel better than his favourite movie. Though, he’d seen it so many times he could practically mouth the lines of the best parts, he found himself rather lulled by it. Asano seemed to want to watch it in complete silence. With nothing to really keep his brain active, he flitted in and out of light sleep after a while, blinking to see a few specs of action.

He still didn’t quite understand why Asano was being so nice to him still. At least, he was a much nicer person than the aura he gave off implied. A summer in his presence had confirmed that for Nagisa. There was no way he was letting his guard down, though, as genuine as some of his actions had seemed to be. Nagisa just couldn’t put his finger on it, yet.

A glancing thought in the back of his head undermined everything else. He was letting his guard down right then, wasn’t he? Nagisa had easily allowed himself to get too comfortable, casually falling asleep. Another side of him realised that comfortable wasn’t necessarily bad. That was, of course, until he realised his head had made its way to Asano’s shoulder. Not that the other boy seemed to mind, but Nagisa wanted to douse himself in holy water as soon as he realised, quickly jolting off.

“Are you okay?” Asano asked, not taking his eyes off the screen.

Nagisa realised it was the end credits playing. “Fine! I’m totally fine… What did you think of the movie?”

He shrugged. “It’s just a cliché action movie,” he sighed, “ _but_ some of it was pretty creative. It’s not awful.” 

At least that made him alert. “You should watch the second one! You can definitely tell they had a bigger budget this time around, the special effects were amazing. It sucks that it’s not out in Japan yet, more people should get to see it.”

Asano’s eyes narrowed. “How have _you_ seen it if it’s not available over here?”        

Uh oh. Nagisa could hardly explain that his teacher had flown he and Karma to Hawaii on a whim for one evening. He needed to think of a reasonable lie, and fast.

“I, uh, streamed it online?”

It seemed to pass. “In English?”

Nagisa stood up, needing to get out fast. “I’m good at English.”

“Going somewhere?”

“Yeah,” Nagisa realised, “A summer festival. I’m glad you liked the movie!”

Once Nagisa was out of there, there wasn’t a lot for him to do. It wasn’t like he could change into anything more festive, given the situation that his stomach had put him in. He didn’t know what he was going to do when it was twice as big. In the end, he decided to ask Kayano if she wanted to meet up before everyone else. They hadn’t actually spent much time together the whole break, and Kayano _was_ one of his close friends.

He headed out around an hour early, meeting her just outside the station. Like a few other girls he’d seen on the way, Kayano was dressed traditionally. She smiled brightly and waved when she saw him, and a warm sensation rolled over Nagisa. There was nothing like spending time with your friends.

Before the rest of their class arrived, they had a good time catching up with each other. Kayano was one of those people who was always so genuine and light-hearted, it was admirable in a way. Nagisa was happy that she was assigned to sit beside him in class, over anybody else. For a moment, he considered taking advantage of the privacy to tell her about the baby.

Nagisa hadn’t even managed to spit it out to Sugino, though, who was much closer to him and more laid back. He wasn’t sure how Kayano would react to such news, be it support or horror. At least he’d managed to get it out to his father. That was a pretty good start, surely. Eventually, he and Kayano wandered to the site of the festival, where everything was in full swing.

They mostly stuck together as they checked out all the stalls and games, chatting lightly about the atmosphere. The night was warm, and the site so colourful - it was definitely the perfect way to end the summer break. As had been happening quite a lot recently, Nagisa got a deep and somewhat uncontrollable urge to eat. Kayano didn’t seem to mind, though, happily going over with him to the stalls.

Korosensei was currently running at least ten of them, using his super speed cloning abilities to do so. At least he looked happy. “Ah, Nagisa kun, I’m happy you decided to visit my stall, I’ll even give you a student discount!”

He was running most of the food stalls, but Nagisa wasn’t going to argue with him. Kayano eyed him a little weirdly when he ordered five chicken sticks and a bag of candyfloss, but he was so hungry, and thinking completely with his stomach. The weird stares continued when Nagisa ripped open the candy floss, pulling a little off as the perfect garnish to his chicken.

“You’re eating that, Nagisa kun?” She said with slight horror in her tone.

Nagisa stopped chewing. “Uhm-“

“I bet that actually tastes pretty good,” Karma appeared behind them, carrying a large bag.

He eyed him. “Did that guy actually give you the games consul?” Earlier, they’d both walked past Karma had been arguing with the guy running the string lottery. Nagisa wasn’t particularly surprised. Karma sure was persistent when he wanted to be.

“Plus my other prizes,” he grinned. “Can I try some?”

Nagisa was so hungry, he didn’t want to share his food, but he still found himself handing it over with a smile. It _was_ pretty weird, but it was all he wanted to eat right then.

“I like it,” he admitted after a few seconds, “if you get the ratio right.” Karma’s eyes darted between the two of them. “I’ll see you around,” he announced, and walked back off in the direction he’d came.

Kayano had gone quiet, as she usually did when Karma was present, but turned to smile at him. “Let’s find somewhere to watch the fireworks.”

“Yeah,” Nagisa agreed, following her in the direction of a mound nearby, to give them a bit more of an elevated view. He frowned, his stomach producing the small vibrations usually responsible for hunger pangs. There was no way he could physically be hungry. He’d eaten so much chicken on the way to the hill he didn’t even want to look at food.

When the fireworks actually started, it only got more intense, though if Nagisa really focused, it felt more like popcorn bursting. Not unlike… movement. Staring down at his own stomach intently, the little butterflies started up whenever a new firework exploded, creating a loud bang in the sky. Nagisa’s doctor had said babies _could_ hear stuff… He couldn’t help but rub his stomach lightly. _I like the fireworks too_.

“Our summer break sure was packed,” Kayano said beside him.

“But I bet our second term’ll be even more packed,” Nagisa replied. He was counting on it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to be on holiday for a week now, so the earliest you're likely to get the next chapter (unless some miracle happens) is next Saturday. As always, I appreciate any comments and kudos <3 (Don't worry karnag fans, there's a lot of fluff in the next chapter)


	14. Return To School Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Summer break is over, and now Nagisa has to deal with classes again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did ya miss me? For real, a lot of fluff was overdue.

There was no way Nagisa could go anywhere like this. He’d sooner wear a dress. Granted, it was his own fault. He should have thought to test his school uniform before the morning he’d have to wear it. The trousers had absolutely no hope of buttoning up in the correct place. The only way he could get them on his body was buttoning them low, which meant they only rose halfway up his butt. To make matters worse, the shirt was so tight that although he could button it, they were gapping so far he was sure they could fly off at any moment.

No matter which way he turned in the mirror, not only was his stomach on display, but it was highlighted by the shape of his clothes. A month or so ago he could have gotten away with the excuse he’d just eaten a lot, but it was clear now, nearly halfway along, that he couldn’t just hide it. The waistcoat helped, slightly, but there didn’t seem to be a way to disguise it, unless Nagisa wanted to carry his bag in front of his stomach all day.

That… seemed like the most viable option. Applying his scent blocker, Nagisa’s main issue was the trousers. They were sure to be a uniform violation. A quick google search gave him the idea of looping one of his hair ties into the fastening. Sure enough, it held the trousers together enough so he could wear them properly, and he could at least hide the small gap that they left. It didn’t do all that much to disguise the bump issue, though.

As he had before summer, Nagisa left the house ten minutes before Asano did, walking in a different direction. It was actually quicker to reach the class building that way, anyway. If he was the first one there, he could just sit down and hide his stomach under the desk with nobody in particular looking at him. Unfortunately, he was already late, and the mountain climb was challenging.

By the time Nagisa made it to the top, considering he hadn’t been able to use the main path from the direction he’d come from, he was actually _late_ for class. Assassination had helped him learn how to act natural, though. All he needed to do was take a deep breath, walk in, and sit down with nobody giving him a second glance. Bag poised in front of his stomach, Nagisa took a deep breath, and entered the school building.

His stealth tactics didn’t go to plan. For starters, Nagisa was never late, so the fact that he _was_ drew attention from the get go, nobody simply shrugging his presence off. Clutching the bag like a shield, he refused to meet their eyes, shuffling over to his desk as quickly as he physically could. Only once he was sat down did he relax feeling less exposed before the pointed look Korosensei gave him, marking him down on the register.

As the lesson went on, at least people seemed to forget about the oddness of his arrival. Nagisa himself attempted to focus on what was being taught, though that was kind of hard. Every time Korosensei’s voice picked up with enthusiasm, small flutters returned to his stomach. After the fireworks the night before, he’d felt them more, especially when he was lying or sitting down. It wasn’t constant, but Nagisa was sure they must be tiny kicks.

The realisation didn’t freak him out as much as it should have. It was one thing to know he was carrying around a living human, another to actually feel it, after all. For some reason, it just brought a smile to his lips. There was no way he could actually know for sure, but he suspected the baby moved more whenever something exciting sounding happened.

By the time the morning lessons were brought to a close, Nagisa was already uncomfortable. It had been a dramatic summer break, but at least he hadn’t been sitting still at old, wooden desks for hours on end. He felt clammy, like he needed to shift every few minutes. The situation was only doomed to get worse as time went on. He was also just about ready to collapse in hunger. Unfortunately, all Nagisa could bear the thought of was chocolate covered strawberries. There probably weren’t many of those around.

When it was actually time for lunch, Nagisa remembered that he didn’t actually have anything to eat at all. He’d spent so long fussing over his clothes that he’d rushed straight out of the door, and it wasn’t like he had any source of money to buy anything. Nagisa’s mouth watered as his classmates pulled out their own food. He would probably pass out without it, but he didn’t have much of a choice.

“Hey, Nagisa kun.” At the sudden voice, Nagisa’s eyes flicked up, noticing Karma standing over his desk. “Want to eat with me outside?”

It felt like that was somehow code for something. It was better than sitting in class and watching everyone else’s nice food, though. Nagisa nodded, and stood up from his desk, stretching out before following Karma outside. They didn’t go very far, with Karma’s judgement just outside the gym storage shed would be a good place to sit.

Karma sighed, apparently comfortable as he lay flat out on the grass. As it was the end of summer, the temperature had changed from unbearably hot to a warmer breeze. For a moment, Nagisa wondered if Karma was going to fall asleep, looking so peaceful sprawled out like that. He himself was sat cross-legged, with nothing better to do than to study Karma’s form.

He peeled one eye open. “Aren’t you hungry?”

Nagisa shifted. “I don’t have any food.”

Without moving an inch of the rest of his body, Karma stuck out his arm, reaching into his bag and blindly feeling around for something. He produced a plastic bag, lazily tossing it to Nagisa. A brief glance told him it was a hasty collection of food, likely purchased from the store that morning.

“Eat up,” he said, a hint of sarcasm lacing his tone.

“Uh, thanks,” he returned politely. He considered arguing, he really did, but Nagisa was starved. It was hardly gourmet but it all looked incredibly good. Nagisa only meant to take some of it, but the moment he took his first bite, the hole inside him caused by the hunger began to fill up. It felt so good to do so that within minutes, it was all gone. _And_ , he was still a little hungry. Shame seeped out of him by the gallon.

“Sorry,” Nagisa finally said, “I didn’t mean to have it all.”

“I’m not that hungry,” Karma responded, like he was in his own world. “Do you want some strawberry milk too?”

Nagisa did. Strawberry sounded absolutely incredible right there and then. Still, he’d tried one of Karma’s favourite drinks before, and it had been so disgusting it had been all Nagisa could do not to spit it out. He really didn’t want to risk it, especially since he’d only just had food. He needed to make the most of it, not vomit it all back up again.

“I’m okay, thanks.” He paused. How long had it been since he and Karma honestly hung out alone together? Nagisa almost forgot how exactly to speak to him. “How’s the games console you won?”

Like magic, Karma sat up, grinning as he began to describe how he’d set it up and the functions of the upgrade as opposed to the other model. Though it wasn’t his biggest hobby, Karma was definitely more interested in gaming than Nagisa had ever been. Though, if he remembered correctly most of his games had been more harmless, popular anime tie in kind of things than the expected war games. At least he could chime in every now and then.

Korosensei’s return, zooming through the window of the classroom (he’d spent the time in Sydney that day), signified that it was the end of break. Karma didn’t seem in a particular hurry himself to get up and return, but Nagisa stood on cue, dusting any stray crumbs off his trousers. When Karma finally stood to join him, picking up his bag, Nagisa realised his big mistake.

He’d been so blinded by hunger that at the first mention of food, Nagisa had jumped out of the classroom, leaving his bag stowed under his desk. The bump on his stomach was going to be on full display. Nagisa would just have to pray, and walk as swiftly as possible back to his seat. Feeling more confident that he could do so, he sped to his seat, as if nothing had happened.

Being less hungry, Nagisa could at least pay attention a little more. At least he would’ve, if he didn’t feel weirdly stared at. He looked at his own pen and paper of course, but Nagisa could sense the eyes bearing into the back of his head. If he had to put up with this for the next few months, he wasn’t completely sure how he’d get through it.

By the end of the day at the very least, when everyone began to pack up to go back home again, they seemed to have forgotten about it. At least then he could return to the safety of bed and hide under the sheets for the next few hours. Nagisa decided the best strategy would be to wait a little, let the others spill out first so he didn’t have to disguise himself so much.

He got as far as the hallway, before running into Isogai of all people who had just emerged from the toilets. “Oh, sorry, Nagisa kun.”

“It’s okay,” Nagisa said, stepping to the side so he could pass.

“Hey, uhm,” he said a little awkwardly, meeting Nagisa’s eyes, “I didn’t say anything today.”

Nagisa wasn’t following. “Huh?”

“About the rumours,” Isogai clarified. “I accidentally overheard your mum talking to the receptionist that day Karma kun and I took you to the hospital. I didn’t confirm anything.”

So _that_ was how Karma had figured it out, rather than some crazy 6 th sense intuition? Nagisa wasn’t exactly embarrassed that Isogai knew, and _had_ clearly known for months now. At least he wasn’t going around adding more fuel to the fire. Most people their age would.

“Thanks,” he decided, “you can tell them if you want.”

“Nagisa kun-“

“I’m not hiding it well,” Nagisa looked down at his stomach. “They’ll find out for real eventually.”

Genuinely, he smiled. “I hope you’re okay.”

“Don’t worry,” Nagisa brushed him off. “It’s under control.”

“Only if you’re sure.”

Nagisa got the feeling he really meant that. He politely excused himself, allowing Isogai to go on to fill out the extra duties that came with being the class representative. At first glance, once he was outside, he was otherwise alone on the mountaintop. The realisation relaxed him somewhat as he took in the space.

“Yo,” an all too familiar voice said behind him.

Of course he’d only be able to enjoy it for a few seconds. Karma was leaning casually against the class building. From the way his demeanour shifted, Nagisa wondered if he’d been waiting specifically for him to come out. He stood up more fully, strolling over to where Nagisa had stopped.

“Wanna hang out at my house for a bit?”

Nagisa swallowed at the out of nowhere request. He’d seen Karma’s house maybe twice in his entire life. Mainly because his mother thought Karma was ‘trouble’, back when they were in first year, but they’d also drifted apart before they really got to that level. From what he remembered, it totally matched Karma’s personality. His bedroom had even been booby trapped. His mother wasn’t there to stop him right then, Nagisa realised.

“Sure,” he agreed. After all, it would be nice to go back to normal, or as normal as they could manage.

Karma’s house was located in the nice part of Kunugigaoka, on the outskirts as far away from the rest of it as possible, which meant they had to take the train to get there. Nagisa wasn’t exactly sure what his parents did, other than travel a lot, but it must be something important to afford such a big home. It wasn’t the same level as the Asano household had, but then again they likely weren’t being paid millions by the government for silence and co-operation.

If not for the look of it, the smell of incense immediately brought back the memories. It wasn’t unpleasant, though. Looking around, the eclectic collections of art and random objects had grown in the two or so years since he’d last set foot inside. Everything was pretty well maintained though, surprisingly not covered in dust. He wondered how often it got cleaned. For some reason, the image of Karma dressed up with an apron and a duster seemed equal parts foreign and hilarious to him.

Nagisa set his bag down at the hallway, smiling to himself as his eyes met an old photo of Karma and his parents in the mountains somewhere, clearly taken five or so years ago. He was holding up some kind of clay artefact, dressed in jungle gear that was much too big for him, grinning from ear to ear with a gap in his teeth. It was actually kind of… cute. They’d never really talked about it, but Nagisa had gathered that Karma’s parents used to take him places a lot, until they decided he was old enough to be left home alone. It would be nice, maybe, to practically live by yourself, though Nagisa wondered if it ever get lonely.

 “Those clothes don’t fit you,” Karma commented as Nagisa stood up, before he could painstakingly tug his shirt back down over his stomach again.

He didn’t really understand why he did it, but Nagisa froze up at the prospect of describing all that had happened to him recently. Not that Karma had any say in what he did, but with Asano’s status as ‘rival’ in his life, he didn’t want to throw fuel on the fire. Even though he considered Karma one of his best friends, he was highly unpredictable. It would be better to keep his silence, just for the moment.

“None of my clothes do,” Nagisa decided to reply without going into detail. “I can’t afford to get any more.”

“Borrow some of mine,” he said, “they might work.”

That would be a little odd, wouldn’t it? Nagisa was pretty sure people didn’t generally just share clothes like that. Though, it would make sense. Karma was a lot taller than him, and although now not nearly as full round the middle, there was at least a better chance that he could wear it without the dangers of buttons ripping open or something. He was lucky they hadn’t already. He signalled his agreement, and they entered Karma’s bedroom, not visibly booby trapped this time. Karma went over to his wardrobe, manically tossing items out of it without much method, so that Nagisa was practically buried in a mountain of clothing.

“Go try it on,” Karma said, once finally satisfied, shoving him the direction of the bathroom.

Still reluctant, Nagisa decided to humour him, changing from his own school shirt into Karma’s larger one. Even without looking at it, he knew it was a bad idea.

“So? Does it work?” It seemed Karma had lost his patience after a minute or so.

Nagisa looked in the mirror briefly, before emerging. He looked absolutely ridiculous. Although the clothes fit him more around the middle, the sleeves fully drooping over his wrists. The shirt didn’t stop at his hips either, as it should, but rather fell down to his thighs. It seemed as if they were about to swallow him hole. Still, better that than his clothes clinging to his stomach.

“Karma kun?” Nagisa asked, his friend’s face unreadable. All he knew was Karma was looking at him weird, too weird. “What’s wrong?”

That seemed to snap him out of it. “Nothing,” he said, “it’s a little long.” As if to prove his point, he stepped closer, tugging at the end of the fabric hanging at Nagisa’s leg.

In doing so, he accidentally brushed the skin of Nagisa’s hip with his knuckle. Surprised, Nagisa jolted back, away from the invasion. Though Karma didn’t verbally tease him, the glint in his eye said that he’d picked up something. Before Nagisa could flinch away in time, he slipped his fingers there with purpose, tickling him rapidly.

Nagisa tried to escape, but Karma gripped him, apparently enjoying his pained laughter. “You’re ticklish, Nagisa kun~”

“St…op,” Nagisa doubled over breathlessly, once Karma did actually let him go. As if on cue, he noticed the stomach flutters appear again, tickling him from yet another angle. The baby was definitely more ‘active’ whenever it was excited. Somehow, the moment set Nagisa in his own world, completely free of anything other than happiness. He didn’t know exactly what it was he felt, like a cocktail of different emotions being shaken up inside him. Whatever it was, even for second, there was only light.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you thought this was fluff, you're not ready for the next two chapters :D As always, I appreciate all feedback!


	15. Scan Time - Second Period

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Karma and Nagisa bond over milk and doctor's appointments

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You asked for fluff, I deliver fluff. Crying also occurs.

As the days went on, Nagisa’s entire situation was still a hot topic, despite the clothes not being so tight anymore. For their first week back, it was as if everyone had forgotten how to speak to him like he was a regular person. Kayano had developed a habit of flushing whenever Nagisa looked in her general direction. Though it was never directly brought up. Nagisa didn’t really understand why, if they’d had some kind of secret discussion or something. He didn’t really feel the need to talk about _it_ , not unless he had to.

Fortunately, their lives were significantly more interesting than that, and it faded to the background. With Itona finally joining their class, everyone’s focused shifted back to assassination. Nagisa was thankful for that, although it hadn’t completely gone away. Every now and then, he’d be shot a sympathetic look or two.

Nagisa didn’t know if he was putting out some kind of signal, but everyone seemed to be offering him food, instead of just Karma (who suspiciously seemed to carry more food around with him, these days). It didn’t help that he didn’t have the willpower to refuse it, not when it was practically served up on a silver platter. At least he wasn’t going hungry. Considering how often he had the urge to eat recently, all in all being somewhat adopted, mostly by the girls, wasn’t _so_ bad.

It didn’t seem to matter how much scent blocker Nagisa doused himself in, he was still getting babied. Even _Karasuma_ was doing it. He’d tried to ban Nagisa from their training entirely, but with as much begging as Nagisa could politely muster, he’d managed to convince their teacher that he could definitely partake in the less dangerous stuff. It was hard, running around now his weight was significantly changed, but there was no way Nagisa was going to just sit everything out. Considering Karasuma hadn’t verbally brought up any reason except weight gain, thankfully, it didn’t seem like there was any danger of being banned.

After a day of this attention, Nagisa was about to fall asleep. It was only the final bell that jolted him awake, signifying that the school day was over. He wasn’t in any particular hurry. In fact, now Nagisa wasn’t supposed to be paying attention to anything, he was about to collapse straight back down onto the desk. Uncomfortable though he was, the idea of sleep won out.

It took a few seconds to get the motivation to actually move from his position. Nagisa sighed, cringing at the effort of bending down to pick up his bag. He winced as he did so, cursing how big the baby was getting. If this was only halfway, Nagisa dreaded how much worse it would probably get. It didn’t help that his bag was heavier too nowadays, filled with all the extra books Korosensei wanted him to read to improve his English.

Right on cue, Kurahashi rushed over. “Nagisa kun! Can you manage it?”

“Carrying such a heavy bag could be dangerous,” Fuwa agreed.

Still seated beside him, Nakamura smirked, and swiftly grabbed Karma by the wrist as he walked past from the back of the classroom. “Don’t _you_ want to help him?”

Something in the way Nakamura’s eyes glinted made Nagisa swallow in danger. There was something not completely light about her intentions. To his surprise, Karma just shrugged, easily taking Nagisa’s bag out of his grip. Nagisa didn’t try to stop him, almost a little alarmed at Karma’s actions. He supposed it wasn’t _really_ babying him, he didn’t have to fight this.

“Coming?” Karma asked, as he turned to walk out of the class.

Quickly, and a lot more easily now he wasn’t carrying anything else, Nagisa followed his steps until they’d exited the building, and began to make their way down the hill. It wasn’t the shortcut Nagisa had found from the Asano residence, but that couldn’t be helped. It was a slightly easier walk, the normal way, too.

“I’m sorry,” Nagisa found himself saying as he strained. “They shouldn’t have made you carry my bag.”

Karma shrugged. “It’s not that heavy.”

“I could have handled it,” he muttered. Though, he did appreciate just a tiny bit less strain. The baby was starting to get seriously big, and with every day Nagisa became more aware that he was carrying around a miniature human all the time. Even the little flutters had become a lot stronger, much more kick like and frequent. Right on cue, he received a sharp one, which came as enough of a shock after the few hours of calm he’d had for him to double over slightly.

Concerned, Karma grabbed him by the arm. “Are you okay?”

“Mmm,” Nagisa winced, standing up properly again. “Just a kick.”

“Really?!” His hands flung out, making towards Nagisa’s stomach.

“Karma kun! The bags!” Nagisa looked over to the ground, which they’d carelessly been dropped on.

Karma stilled, dropping his outstretched palm. “Oh, right. I’ll pick them up.”

Chewing his lip, Nagisa grabbed Karma’s wrist before he could change his mind. “Here, just press lightly.” He guided Karma’s tentative hand, lifting up the fabric of his shirt to make it easier. Nagisa wasn’t quite sure if he’d be able to feel it or not, considering Nagisa had barely felt it himself at first… though it had been getting stronger.

“Nagisa kun, it’s not-“ He froze, eyes widening as the baby tried another strong whack. Almost instantly, his other hand moved to cup the remaining area of his abdomen, pressing down a little firmer. As if the baby could feel him too, it rewarded Karma with a series of even stronger kicks.

Nagisa smiled softly at the look on his face. “You woke them up properly now.”

Karma didn’t look like he was entirely with him. “So tiny!” It seemed the soft kicks had evolved into target practice with Nagisa’s internal organs, causing him to wince again. “And so strong already,” Karma grinned, “we’re going to have to enrol them in martial arts classes.”

That left a bad taste in Nagisa’s mouth, but he let it pass. It wasn’t like he was getting too attached or anything just from a small, harmless fantasy. If he shut his eyes, he believed it too, for a moment. It was like that first flutter of movement all over again, weirdly blissful. Until the kicks sped up again.

“I wish they were a little less strong,” he bit out.

“It hurts?”

“Ah!” Nagisa clenched up at another kick, before relaxing his shoulders. “Only sometimes.”

“Hey there,” Karma crouched slightly so his head was more level with the bump, speaking with unprecedented softness. “That’s really impressive, you’re going to be great at torture someday… but maybe you shouldn’t start on your daddy.”

As if by magic, the baby really did settle down, though Nagisa could feel it squirming around a little still.

Karma still appeared transfixed. “Nagisa kun… they _listened_ to me.”

Lucky bastard.

Nagisa looked down at him, before confusion struck. “Karma kun, are you… crying?”

“ _No_.” Karma stood up and turned his head away from Nagisa, wiping his eyes on the back of his sleeve.

Feeling something overwhelming rise up within him, Nagisa forced himself to turn away and not get too caught up in whatever bliss this moment contained. “We have to come home,” he said, though he wasn’t annoyed. Karma picked the bags back up again, and they walked down the mountain together.

Nagisa realised, maybe half the way there, that he didn’t currently live where Karma assumed was his home. Ever since leaving Hiranka san’s apartment, Nagisa had no desire to go back anywhere near that part of town. In fact, that sounded like the worst possible place to go.

“I can take the bags from here,” Nagisa said, the minute they were at the bottom of the hill.

“I don’t mind,” Karma reassured him.

“Really,” Nagisa said, reaching for them. “Thank you.”

“Suit yourself,” Karma said, handing them over. “Later, then,” he walked off in the direction of the train station.

The next morning, Nagisa was the first one in class, the way he preferred it recently. Funnily enough, his living situation had actually benefited his academics. With nothing better to do with his time, Nagisa had seriously taken to just doing homework. It also weirdly helped that there was an air of pressure surrounding the property. It was no wonder that Asano was as ridiculously genius, even with this natural talent. Though Nagisa had none of Korosensei’s strange assignments left to complete to occupy his time, he pulled out two books, recommended for their significance in literature, one copy in English and one in Japanese so he could reference the words he didn’t understand. At least it would wake his mind up.

“Yo, Nagisa kun,” Karma had strolled into the classroom without Nagisa noticing, after he’d read a couple of chapters. He tapped his fingers on the page of the book, as if his voice wasn’t enough to get Nagisa’s attention.

Nagisa took his eyes away from the words, and smiled politely. “Good morning.”

Though it was unusual for Karma to be early to anything, especially class. He didn’t wear the odd circumstances on his face, casually pulling up a chair, leaning with his elbows over Nagisa’s desk. “Sleep well?” He yawned.

“Yeah,” Nagisa replied, though it was only half true. The baby’s movements had become significant enough, especially when he lay still, to be pretty distraction. “Thanks.”

“Milk?” Karma offered, pulling two pink cartons out of his bag. He stabbed the straw though one of them, leaning back casually to sip at it.

Nagisa hated the beverage with a passion, but he was actually a little thirsty. “Sure,” he said, taking the other drink. At least his taste buds hadn’t shifted so much that this magically tasted good to him, artificial strawberry would always be one of the worst things. Still, he sipped at it, the sensation of liquid nice down his throat.

“How are your human chorionic gonadotropin levels? Are they in the normal range?” Karma leaned back forwards, chewing on the end of his straw.

“My what?”

Karma shrugged. “What about your progesterone?”

Was that something Nagisa should know about? It sounded long and about science, probably beyond his level. “I don’t even know what that is,” Nagisa admitted.

“It’s a hormone,” Karma explained, “it’s important for, you know,” he simply gestured Nagisa’s form.

Of course Nagisa grasped what he meant. Perhaps Nagisa really should know what those things were, then. He was surprised that Karma did, though he knew a lot of things. It was like something had changed, after they walked home together. Karma seemed weirdly… interested. Nagisa decided he was okay with that, more than. It would be somewhat of a nice change to not be keeping this all to himself.

“Why don’t you just come to my appointment with me?” Nagisa said before he could think it over properly. “Then you can just ask the doctor.”

Karma was silent for a moment, long enough for Nagisa to slightly regret asking. “Sounds like fun,” he said in his usual nonchalant tone, though Nagisa suspected he really did mean it.

Before they could talk anymore about it, the others begun to file into the classroom. It was their cue to separate, Karma standing up casually and going to his own seat. Nagisa put the books and empty milk cartoon into his bag, the taste of strawberry lingering on his tongue. For the rest of the day, he got lost in the lessons, and he didn’t talk to Karma about anything baby related, except from agreeing on the location and time to meet.

When the weekend, and the date of the appointment, rolled in, once again Nagisa was surprised to find Karma there early, earlier than he was. He smiled, bundling his hands up in the far too long material of Karma’s sweatshirt, which Nagisa had chosen to wear considering the chill of the autumn weather (it also held a comforting scent).

Though it was slightly less exposing to not be sat in the clinic alone, Nagisa still felt the stares set on them. He squirmed, pulling out his phone so he could disappear mentally from it all. Karma did the same beside him, brandishing his DS console. At least he didn’t seem bothered by the attention. Nagisa swallowed, forcing his eyes back to his own device.

“Shiota Nagisa?” The receptionist finally called.

They both stood up, following her the way into the doctor’s office. Nagisa was slightly thankful it was the same room as before. He didn’t really understand why, but he felt a little better and more at ease due to that.

Doctor Shirogane turned around on her chair, smiling. “Ah, Nagisa kun. Take a seat, please. This must be your alpha.”

“He’s not my alpha.”

“I’m not his alpha.”

They both said simultaneously.

She cleared her throat. “Well, there’s a chair over here, uh…”

“Karma’s fine,” he said, sitting down on the seat next to the examination bed, where Nagisa had already taken his place.

“Okay,” Doctor Shirogane said, though Nagisa could tell there was some hesitance in the way she looked between them. “Well, Nagisa kun, I’ll start by taking your blood pressure,” she approached him, and got to work. “How have you been feeling?”

“The sickness stopped,” Nagisa replied, “so not too bad.”

She noted down the figures of his blood pressure. “That’s good. Though don’t be surprised if you start to experience some aches and pains. Heart burn is especially common around this time.”

That didn’t sound like much fun. Nagisa swallowed, knowing deep down it would only get worse.

Moving forward on her chair, she instructed Nagisa to pull his shirt up. She placed a firm hand on his stomach, feeling around for something. “Definitely a lot bigger than before, huh,” she said, putting a little pressure on him.

“What are you doing to him?” Karma finally piped up, steel lacing his tone.

“ _Karma kun_ ,” Nagisa warned, sensing threat.

Doctor Shirogane laughed it off. “I’m just feeling for the location of the uterus. It shouldn’t hurt him. Don’t worry,” she looked more towards Nagisa, “some protective instinct is actually a healthy and natural reaction. I’m just going to measure the bump now, okay?”

Karma scoffed, but at the very least didn’t make any kind of fuss besides that. In fact, he didn’t say anything else, as Doctor Shirogane took out a tape measure, and wrote down the correct figures. Despite that, Nagisa could feel the level of focus coming from him. He almost wanted to turn around and snap Karma out of it.

“Alright,” she finally said, reaching for her small table of equipment, “time for the fun part. You’ll remember that the gel can be very cold, Nagisa kun.”

Nagisa winced all the same as it hit his body, still uncomfortable even with the warning. She quickly smoothed over it with the ultrasound equipment, though, so the really cold feeling didn’t last for long. The screen on the machine was turned on, and there it was. Definitely more defined, more proportionate, but still his baby.

 “See there,” Doctor Shirogane pointed out, “looks like they’re hiccupping.”

He couldn’t hold back his gasp. “It can hiccup?”

“Can you feel that?” Karma asked beside him.

Nagisa shook his head slowly, eyes glued to the screen. Sure enough, he could see the baby jerk a little. They were such tiny little movements, fleeting. So small that he couldn’t even feel them, as he did the other movements. Hiccups were such a normal thing, so basic, but Nagisa’s heart just crumbled the more he looked at it.

“That’s so _cute_ ,” he said, as light tears begun to fall. “I’m sorry, I don’t know why I’m crying.”

Slightly awkwardly, Karma touched his shoulder, as if to comfort him. It was an awfully nice and serious gesture, which made Nagisa suspicious. How often was it that Karma really focused on things? It was meticulous, as Doctor Shirogane proceeded. She explained that this scan was much more in-depth, mostly to check the development of everything was fine. Nagisa had to force himself not to cry again when she zoomed right in on the heart, literally showing it beating.

Nagisa found himself zoning out through a lot of it, as Karma asked whatever medical questions he’d wanted to. If it was truly important, he was sure it would be explained to him. Instead, Nagisa just watched the screen, which had been zoomed out again to show the whole picture. Somehow, he didn’t think he’d ever possibly tire of it.

“It’s right now that I’d usually be able to tell you the gender,” Doctor Shirogane said a little louder, and more in Nagisa’s direction, “but the baby is lying in an awkward position.”

Of _course_ it was. Of course their child was destined to have a mysterious side. It sounded a lot like Karma. Nagisa wasn’t sure how he felt about that, entirely.

“Do you both want a copy of some of the pictures?” She asked. “I captured a few good ones.”

They both said yes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look see they're developing... at /a/ pace. You'll definitely like next chapter if you're into your karnag, cheeky bit of Karma POV :D As always, your comments mean the world to me! <3


	16. Time To D-D-D-Duel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Karma has some pretty strange thoughts, and Bitch Sensei organises a competition

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Time for some Karma POV! I'm sorry it took a bit longer to get done, but it was a little challenging to write. Still, I hope you'll all enjoy the result! (And yes, I saw the opportunity to reference Yugioh and took it)

Karma was bored, plainly. He hated average, harmless days like this. The assassination attempt of earlier, a combination of his first ever try and Kayano’s recent pudding plot, had been weak. Though whatever Okuda had done to the shards of anti-sensei material to make them practically microscopic was pretty impressive, Korosensei had sussed out they were hidden in his food instantly.

There had been a lull in attempts recently. Karma suspected it was due to what happened over summer, with how un-killable Korosensei had turned out to be despite their greatest efforts. More the opportunist, Karma was waiting on making any plans of his own. It wasn’t as if anybody’s bloodlust was going anywhere.

He wished he’d just skipped this lesson. He could’ve got away with it, no problem. All it would take was slipping away during the lunch period. Karma hadn’t taken the chance whilst he had it, though. In fact, he hadn’t really skipped at all recently. He sat back in his chair, letting his eyes drift away from the board. Tapping his fingers lightly on his book, Karma focused on the same desk, three rows in front, two to the left. At least somebody was focusing on the lesson. Karma sighed, watching sky blue hair bounce slightly as something was written down.

So maybe that had been a slight factor to his renewed interest in school. Although he’d forced himself as best he could to banish whatever protective instincts his inexperienced body was throwing at him, they weren’t completely gone. Watching from a distance was fine, or at least he presumed it was fine. So long as he wasn’t actually _doing_ anything. 

The bell rang, snapping him out of it. The day wasn’t over though, since they still had PE. At least those lessons had become more interesting, now that Karasuma had upped the difficulty. Instead of skipping, he got changed with everyone else, and walked outside. Karasuma wasn’t actually there waiting for them already, due to some government thing. He’d had a lot of those recently.

With nothing better to do, everyone split up, most electing to practice in their small groups to kill the time. Karma would have been fine to just sit down and relax, but he could hardly turn down the challenge of a fight. His nervous system lit up, driving into hyper awareness, at the insinuation of practice.

“Karma kun,” Isogai had said, “want to spar?”

They weren’t particularly friends, too much of a rule follower for Karma’s tastes. Still, they were perfect opponents for this kind of thing, evenly matched in most ways. So Karma had agreed, drawing his knife and getting into stance. Karasuma’s higher intensity lessons had meant that everyone was at a certain standard. Bored of being the best fighter purely by default, it was a welcome change.

He spun the blade in his hand as Isogai attacked. Seconds into the fight, he really had to concentrate, attempting to block his thrusts with the back of his forearm. Isogai’s strikes were fast, almost completely dead on target. Whilst Karma could predict his movements before they were made, Isogai lunged hard, hitting with purpose. The situation wasn’t ‘life or death’ enough for his instincts to really shift into high gear, and with a particularly well timed blow, Karma’s knife, and body, was on the ground.

After wiping the sweat off his brow, he kicked back up onto his legs, grinning. He didn’t mind losing too much. It had been a fair fight, and Karma would readily admit that, holding out a hand for Isogai to shake in a sign of respect. As he turned to pick the blade he’d dropped back up, his eyes met Nagisa’s… well, Nagisa’s _ass_.

A few yards closer to the class building, Nagisa was bent in some kind of _position_. His hands were on the grass in front of him, with his feet planted firm on the ground too, so he was bent over. Karma’s grip tightened on the knife faltered as he witnessed Nagisa change the angle slightly, lifting his butt even higher into the air. It was if his brain had short circuited out of nowhere, and all he could think about how _round_ his ass cheeks were. Not that he’d ever spent much time staring at asses, but this one seemed particularly full. He briefly wondered if he could figure out the circumference and volume of them, though accurate calculations would call for a closer look.

Nagisa bent out the position (almost disappointingly), turning around in a standing stretch, he smiled when he saw Karma looking at him, waving before returning to the position. As Karma’s eyes raked over the omega’s body, his throat got dryer. He’d never really _looked_ at Nagisa before. He had such a pretty smile, showing through weirdly plush lips. Like the rest of the (unfortunately lacking) exposed skin, they were pale, smooth and flawless. The newly swollen curve of his stomach had only made his hips look wider, thighs so thick Karma had the urge to dig his fingers into the flesh and squeeze. Nagisa bent down again to pick up his water bottle, and Karma observed with rapt attention the swallowing motion of his unmarked throat.

 _Wow_ , Nagisa was attractive. He was the kind of attractive where some classic American rock tune would fit perfectly as the backing music to a slow mo montage of him flipping his hair. Had he always looked like that? Had he always appeared so irresistible, or had he just been completely blind to it before?

Isogai had practically jumped back, turning his nose in disgust. With horror, Karma realised he was reeking of his own alpha scent. He felt himself flush bright red, turning the opposite way. He’d have to just make a deal with himself to not look at Nagisa for too long at once again. If nothing else, leaking out pheromones like that was uncomfortable for everyone within his radius, especially another alpha. The scents just didn’t mix well.

Karasuma showed up before anything else could go too haywire. As if he’d never left at all, they picked up where they’d left off, war games that were more like combat drills. He could admit that at the very least they were entertaining, even challenging. By the time he was done with them, they’d all worked up a sweat.

When everybody was packing up to go home, he noticed Nagisa looked a little worse for wear. Physically he understood that, considering his body was already working itself overtime, but Nagisa still insisted that he could handle the same as everyone else. Now Karma had opened Pandora’s box, he couldn’t shut it again, watching Nagisa pant with exertion for far too long. He suddenly had the urge to study every single thing about him, down to the rise and fall of his chest.

Before Nagisa could go off in his own way, Karma strode over, yanking his bags out of his hands. Although Karma had done this more often than not recently, Nagisa still startled at being yanked, looking up at him with wide eyes, before he made an effort to grab them back.

“I can carry my own bags,” he said, once Karma had swung them too far out of his reach.

Karma knew he probably could. He could feel that they weren’t _that_ heavy, and he’d seen him carry them with no issue before. Admittedly, he’d missed spending the time together. Nagisa, despite his clearly more threatening side, was definitely Karma’s only real friend. He was fine with that, it wasn’t as if he had much use for friends in the first place. Maybe purposely staring at his butt crossed the line of friendship, however. That was just a moment of weakness. Besides, it was Nagisa’s face he was looking at, right then.

His face was nice enough to look at, too. Mostly evenly shaped, large eyes, smooth skin – it fit with what was largely considered attractive on omegas. He’d go as far as to think that Nagisa maybe qualified as ‘pretty’, in his own way. That is, if you didn’t notice the silent unsettling menace that danced across his eyes every now and then.

“What’s wrong?” Nagisa said, snapping him out of whatever thoughts he was experiencing. He blinked, remembering that he usually would have come up with some taunt by now, rather than just staring.

He thought on the spot. “You’re sweaty.”

“Oh,” Nagisa said, wiping his forehead with the back of his arm.

“Now you have to let me carry them,” he said, shrugging as he started to walk off, “so you won’t get sweaty again.”

That didn’t make much sense. At the very least, Karma would have liked to think he could pull some somewhat convincing logic out of somewhere. Nagisa either didn’t question it, or just gave up, following Karma the same way down the hill. They made light conversation, as they usually did, but Karma couldn’t concentrate on it, or anything else but Nagisa’s movements.

Maybe there _was_ something wrong with him. His own hands were getting sweaty, even, the more he looked. Running dead into a tree and slamming his head against it seemed like the best way to deal with whatever this was. Unfortunately, Karma wasn’t alone, and doing that would make him appear even crazier.

In front of the train station, which was on the way to Nagisa’s apartment, he paused, clearly expecting Karma to hand him his bags back. They’d been through this ritual before, but now Karma was truly studying him, he noticed something _off_ in Nagisa’s composure, like he was a little nervous about something. Instantly, Karma’s own mind sharpened up.

“Nagisa kun, don’t you want me to walk you all the way home?” He tried, not handing the bag over.

“It’s fine,” Nagisa said a little too fast, “you’d miss your train.”

Karma decided not to budge. “They run every few minutes.”

“Please,” he softened his voice and widened his eyes, “it would make me feel bad.”

He had no rational explanation for it, but something inside of him twisted at that. It wasn’t as if Nagisa was trying to control him. The idea of doing something that would hurt him in any way felt purely _wrong_. For Karma, that was a foreign sensation, he’d never had qualms about harming anybody in the past, revealed in it, even. Nagisa certainly hadn’t been an exception to that before.

Somewhat stunned by whatever that was, he held out the bags finally, saying nothing else until Nagisa had taken them, said his own goodbye, and walked out of the station. Karma blinked, finally coming back to his senses when Nagisa was gone. It was incredibly... shifty. There was definitely something Nagisa wasn’t letting on.

Before Karma could tell himself there were bigger issues than what Nagisa was doing, curiosity got the better of him, as it usually did. Since they’d had to come all the way down the mountain, the busiest period of students commuting through the station was over, so Nagisa wasn’t lost to the crowd. Karma easily spotted him, outside the station, heading the opposite direction from his house.

 Apparently his qualms about harming Nagisa didn’t apply to following him, at least. Karma was more than apt at this, keeping as large a distance as possible so nothing would alarm Nagisa of his presence. His guard appeared to be down, anyway, and it was best being kept like that. Luckily, his appearance was distinctive enough that Karma could easily keep track of his movements.

Weirdly, he appeared to be heading back to school. It was possible that he had some club or extra lesson or something, but there was no good reason to be so deceitful about it. Though Nagisa could potentially get embarrassed about extra school work being necessary, Karma doubted he’d hold onto it being secret for so long.

It got even stranger when Nagisa continued past the school, not entering its grounds at all. They were the only two people around, so Karma really had to keep up the stealth. He’d definitely come far enough that he couldn’t play the following off as some kind of accident. The best way was to be overly cautious, keeping almost a street length away from Nagisa.

Finally, he turned into a large looking house. Karma had no idea whose it was; if he got any closer to read the name plate, he’d easily get discovered. Stranger still was that Nagisa didn’t go to the front door and knock in his usual polite way, but instead went round the back and let himself in. That ruled out a private tutor. And considering he’d lied about it… the whole thing was shady.

Karma could have staked the place out for more clues, but he decided the payoff wouldn’t be worth the effort. At least for now, he knew Nagisa was keeping something from him. He’d find out what, soon enough, by whatever means necessary. After everything, he did in fact have to wait for the next train for a while, by the time he made it back to the station, and the sun was setting as he reached his house.

He flopped back on his bed, too full of thought to study much of anything. At least the mystery of it all was a distraction from his… other feelings. Groaning after a while, he rolled over, trying to think about anything other than the way Nagisa had looked at him. Facing his side, he caught sight of the small set of images that rested on the table. He smiled slightly, picking up and admiring his copy of the scans, before sighing, letting the reel fall to his chest. That was another complication.

The next day started out just as average as the last, and Nagisa was completely back to normal. Karma was bored again, albeit keeping a strict eye on whatever Nagisa was doing. He was halfway through imagining how exactly he could comfort him, when there seemed to be more than light disagreement towards the front of the class.

“Aw, come on Bitch Sensei,” Maehara stretched out casually, “we were just kidding.”

As she often did, their teacher looked seriously ticked off. Karma almost wanted to congratulate Maehara for getting her that worked up, and then to ask exactly how he did it for future reference. She looked as if her head was about to explode. Before she could pull her own hair out, however, she took a deep breath, and leaned across the desk, forcing Maehara to kiss her for around half a minute before releasing him.

They’d had more than a few lessons on her signature ‘kiss of death’, so Maehara was able to pull away from it mostly unscathed. This fact seemed to irritate her, though the anger had deflated as she plopped back down on the desk, muttering about how bored she was.

She perked up again, like she’d had the best idea in the world. “Surprise test time!”

That earned a groan from everyone.

Folding her arms, Bitch Sensei grabbed hold of some chalk. “Push all the desks so we have a ring in the middle of class, or I’ll just make it worse.”

Though he wasn’t afraid of her on any level, Karma didn’t want to find out what ‘worse’ was going to be, so like the rest of them he obeyed, until there was a clear square, similar to the set up months ago when Itona had fought Korosensei. Whilst they’d been putting in the hard work, the board had been filled with what looked like the set up of a tournament, with all their names listed it seemingly random order.

“Are you serious?” Isogai questioned. “A tournament?”

Bitch Sensei nodded. “The First 3-E Kiss Tournament!” 

“Is that legal?” Somebody, judging by the quietness of the tone probably Okuda, asked.

She leant back in her chair, looking down at them all like she was some sort of super villain/genius. “How else am I supposed to grade you on seduction?”

It was clear that she was doing this out of a place of boredom and laziness, but it wasn’t worth the fight. Karma didn’t care too much, it was no worse than some of the other stuff she’d made them do with the excuse of ‘education’. No matter what, it was better than repeating the letter ‘v’ for half an hour.

“You haven’t split this between boys and girls!” Yoshida complained, presumably because he was lined up to kiss somebody of his own gender.

“It’s assassination,” Bitch Sensei rolled her eyes, “not fun.”   

Nobody really put too much of a fight, against him anyway. Karma sailed through the first three rounds with ease, barely kissing anybody for more than a few seconds before he was declared the winner. Though he was unaffected, the atmosphere had risen somewhat, becoming far more competitive. It was kind of stupid, and not like they were going to win much. Of course, Karma did understand the satisfaction that came with winning.

There were some surprises, such as Okuda making it as far as that round, though she’d looked about ready to pass out before Karma had even really touched her. Ritsu had been knocked out the first round, though, given that she was a machine (not that Takebayashi hadn’t tried – a clip of which Karma had captured and saved for future torment). And then there was Nagisa, who like him had made it to the final four.

Karma swallowed, realising what this result meant. Due to the rules of Bitch Sensei’s tournament, he would have to face Nagisa next. It wasn’t like he’d been trying before, or that he particularly cared about the result of this stupid test. But he was going to have to kiss Nagisa. Maybe he could just cop out with a small peck and call it a day, but Karma never was good with backing down from competition. Plus, he kind of wanted to see how the look of defeat would be written over Nagisa’s face.

He stepped forwards casually to face Nagisa in the makeshift combat ring, trying to ignore the fact that they had a massive audience. Or perhaps that would help him keep his cool. It wasn’t a _real_ kiss, just a display he could easily get over and done with, so they could move on from this. Besides, he’d already kissed Nagisa once, he already knew what it was like.

The memory of it, suddenly uncomfortably filling his brain, was doing the opposite of calming him down. Karma’s heart seemed to race at the thought of Nagisa’s lips sliding against his in the dark, the ghost of his fingers gripping onto Karma’s shoulders, practically manhandling him back into the bathroom. After a hand was shoved down his trousers, Karma’s memory was patchy at best, non-existent at worst. But that had been under the influence of alcohol. He was completely alert this time, it would be easier. If only whatever odd feeling in his stomach would disappear.

Nagisa showed no such hesitation, wordlessly grabbing onto the lapels of Karma’s blazer before he could break up the atmosphere with some kind of joke. He only caught the menace in Nagisa’s pupils, the true gaze of an assassin about to go in for the kill, for a moment before he stuck. Despite the madness that had danced across his eyes, Nagisa’s lips were surprisingly soft against his, in both pressure and texture.

Still alert, Karma realised that Nagisa was standing up on his tiptoes to reach him, tugging at his clothes to actually support his weight. Letting go of whatever boundaries he had, Karma decided to just go in for it, leaning down and shifting them so that Nagisa’s feet were on the ground again. It gave him more of a vantage point, a less extreme version of having Nagisa beneath him.

Nagisa didn’t seem to mind this change, sliding his hands from the blazer to cup Karma’s face. The kiss, and touch of his hands, was light, but Karma got the unsettling feeling Nagisa was preparing to snap his neck the second he let his guard down. He responded to the threat naturally, wrapping his arms around Nagisa’s much smaller body, in preparation to crush his form. It also practically pinned his hands in place, keeping them from doing anything funny.

It was still just a kiss, the mechanics just like any other. As long as Karma kept in control of it, it wasn’t nearly as bad as he’d thought it would be, just because it was _Nagisa_. In fact, the longer the gentleness went on, the more Karma urged to deepen it, to win this dumb contest and tease him about it later. Logically, he knew he shouldn’t let his guard down, or get too cocky, but the fighter inside him won out.

Softly, he bit down on Nagisa’s lower lip, lightly tugging it between his teeth. It had the desired reaction of Nagisa gasping, parting his lips just enough to allow tongue access. Moving quickly, Karma pried the space open further with his own lips. Nagisa didn’t move away from him, apparently unwilling to just give up by that point. Well he could try, but Karma had the upper hand already. He could work Nagisa to pieces, and he was going to.

Not that Nagisa was passive. He followed the pace Karma set, matching whatever movement he made by the book. Karma wasn’t sure how long it went on for, other than the awareness that there was little space between their bodies, and the temperature had clearly risen. Deciding they had to finish this battle, Karma slid his hands up Nagisa’s back, to hold the back of his head. Nagisa had a _thing_ about his hair, something easily exploitable to catch him off guard. He buried his fingers into the hairs just above the nape of his neck, tugging lightly.

Practically vibrating in his arms, Karma was sure he’d won. But then, there was a hand on his ass. Karma hadn’t even noticed Nagisa move away from his face, but clearly it was no accident. Nagisa _squeezed_ , causing Karma’s brain to short circuit. _Nagisa_ was touching his butt. On purpose. And kissing him. Hands were still on his butt.

The situation was hopeless. Karma was frozen, and Nagisa didn’t hesitate. He came alive, like lightning, and Karma was nothing more than his helpless victim. He couldn’t even keep up as Nagisa’s lips practically claimed his entire soul. Not even aware of how many hits it was, his knees buckled the second they separated, falling embarrassingly on the floor.

He was stunned, everything blurred, though he was sure Nagisa had walked away, as if nothing had happened. Nagisa could have stabbed him right then and there, if he’d wanted. All the strength in the world couldn’t have helped Karma. There was no doubt in his mind – Nagisa was a born assassin, a killer who could be done with him whenever he wanted. Karma definitely felt fear, deep set in him, but there was something else, something more intense than that.

And then Karma realised the only rational explanation. He was in love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Worth the wait? Hehe, poor Karma. 
> 
> It was really awesome to get a large response to last chapter, and really motivated me to get this out through some nasty personal stuff. Please, keep the comments coming!


	17. Stake Out Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The class attempt to discover the origins of Nagisa's pregnancy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A bit of Sugino to cap off this arc of 'finding stuff out'! Because this chapter is from his POV, I'm referring to him as Tomohito rather than the fandom common way of Sugino, given that it would be weird to him to think of himself by his family name.

It was just an average day for Tomohito. With midterms approaching once again, the tension had shifted towards the exams. No bets related to assassination had taken place this time, but after their match with the A Class at the sports festival, everybody felt the tension and the urge to silence them once and for all. Even with Korosensei’s guidance, Tomohito was nowhere near scoring top grades, but all the same it felt like a team effort.

Tomohito had left the classroom during lunch break to go to the toilet, turning his back to the chaotic discussions between everybody. When he slid the door back open again, the chatter died down completely, twenty five eyes, their entire class minus Nagisa and Karma who had gone off outside, blinking up at him in sync. Unused to such attention, simply from walking into a classroom, Tomohito knew something was up.

“Sugino kun!” Maehara stood up from his desk, clapping him on the back. “You’re close friends with Nagisa, right?”

He had no idea why he was asking, but Tomohito had no problem telling him the truth. “I guess…” he moved away, going back to his own desk, “we haven’t hung out that much for a while. He spends most of his time with Karma nowadays.”

“As if you’re gonna get an answer out of _him_ ,” Terasaka reclined in his desk.

His answer apparently wasn’t good enough, as several of his classmates surrounded his desk. “Did you… notice if he was dating anybody?” Yada pressed.

Tomohito flushed, the idea of Nagisa dating anybody abstract. “ _Why_?”

“You can’t get pregnant by yourself,” Nakamura said casually. “They’re trying to figure out who his baby daddy is.”

“Huh? _Pregnant_?”

He felt the stares on him from everybody once again. “You didn’t notice?”

They had to be joking. Sure, he’d noticed Nagisa had put on quite a bit of weight recently, but that wasn’t the kind of thing he’d question or dwell on. Tomohito was a beta, and knew as a result that his sense of scent was far less than the other dynamics. As far as he knew, Nagisa was a beta too, practically by default considering how rare male omegas were.

“It’s true,” Isogai sighed from the front of the class, seriously. “Nagisa didn’t mention it to you?”

The attention shifted, and suddenly everybody was surrounding Isogai’s desk. “He confirmed it?”

“No way!”

“How do you know?”

Tomohito allowed himself to calm down, just a little, at that revelation. So he hadn’t been completely blind to what was going on with his friend, then. This entire thing was just an overly dramatic class theory.

Isogai stood up, like he was about to give a speech to a crowd. “Nagisa did give me permission to share this. Before the summer break, he seemed _really_ sick. I caught him throwing up two days in a row, but he said he was fine. It was only when I was closing up the building, the same day he defeated Takaoka, that it got really bad and he collapsed. Karma and I took him to the hospital, and we were waiting to see if he was okay when his mum ran in and started shouting about it to the receptionist.”

There was no reason for Isogai to make all of that up, Tomohito realised. An uncomfortable feeling rushed through his body, like he couldn’t comprehend what was even going on. Before the summer break would mean all of this happened months ago. Had Tomohito really not noticed?

Kayano, who had been quiet throughout all of this, stuck her head up. “Karma kun was there?”

“Yeah,” Isgoai confirmed. “We ran into him halfway there, and he helped me carry Nagisa.”

Nakamura muttered something under her breath.

Maehara looked over at her. “He didn’t mention anything to you, Kayano chan?”

She looked down again. “Nothing. Like Sugino kun said, he spends most of his time with Karma kun now.”

“That makes sense.” Itona, of all people, piped up from the back. “If Karma is the only one Nagisa can speak to about it.”

Fuwa cleared her throat. “I can work this out.”

Leaning back, Sugaya rolled his eyes. “I don’t think this has happened in one of your detective manga.”

“Don’t you see the signs?” She said, a mad look in her eye. “The reason Nagisa has been so quiet about this is because the father is famous!”

* * *

_Through the deep, dark night in central Tokyo, Shiota Nagisa strolled. He was clearly underdressed for the coolness of twilight, shivering as he made his way down narrow and cluttered streets. The young omega sighed out, watching his breath turn into a small cloud of mist in front of his step. To make matters even worse, the sky roared, and a flood of rain began to drop down on his shoulders._

_“Hey, you,” a strong voice called out. “Are you okay there?_

_Not wanted to inconvenience anybody, Nagisa turned around, pulling his damp clothes around his frame. “I’m fine, thank you.”_

_Before Nagisa could walk away, the mysterious man caught him by the wrist. He reached into the bag he was carrying, producing an umbrella which he opened, covering both their heads. “That’s better, huh?”_

_Nagisa blushed. “T-thank you.”_

_“Let’s go somewhere warmer, yeah? It would be wrong of me to leave you here alone in the cold.” He continued to hold onto Nagisa’s arm, walking at his own pace._

_Side by side, the two made their way through the veil of darkness, the city ambience and heavy sound of the rain filling the lack of conversation. They hurried, until the attractive stranger stopped outside a large and very fancy hotel, standing out from the rest of the scenery around them._

_“I hope this isn’t too forward,” the man said, once they were safe in the lobby, “but you should come with me to my room to dry off. You could get sick if you stay in those clothes.”_

_Nagisa trembled. “I don’t even know your name.”_

_He smirked, leaning down to Nagisa’s level. “It’s Sasaki Takumi.”_

* * *

“Wait, like the pop idol?!”

* * *

_“Oh,” Nagisa said, following him into the elevator. “Nice to meet you, then.”_

_“You can call me Tachan, if you’d like,” he stood closer, lifting Nagisa’s hand up to his lips._

_“This is such a big room,” Nagisa commented, once he was let inside, and looked out at the prime view it had over the city._

_Sasaki Takumi folded his arms. “You need comfort when you’re touring the world.”_

_“Of course,” Nagisa nodded._

_Before Nagisa had time to react, Sasaki Takumi sped into his personal space, bracing himself against the window with one hand, which trapped Nagisa’s body. “Perhaps an omega as beautiful as you right here could help me feel more comfortable.”_

_Nagisa gulped. “I-I-“_

_He leant in. “I’m about to travel for several months. Let’s make some final memories.”_

_And then Nagisa gave into the offer of the night of passion, knowing that their affair would be doomed to end by the sunrise._

* * *

“That’s definitely never happened in a detective manga.”

Fuwa flushed. “It may have been a collaboration with Kirara chan.”

“That doesn’t sound anything like Nagisa,” Tomohito finally said, though he was currently revaluating everything he knew about his friend.

Kayano chimed in “plus, why would he just be in the city like that?”

Nakamura sighed. “I know for a fact it’s not true, because I know who it is.”

Everybody turned in tandem, and before she could even move a muscle, her desk was surrounded by _everybody_.

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Maehara spluttered, apparently one of leaders behind the investigation. “Who is it?!”

Nakamura shrugged. “It’s serious blackmail material, I don’t want to waste it just yet.”

Glancing between each other, everyone turned back to her in disbelief. “You can’t just leave it at that!”

Like she was studying them all, Nakamura stretched out. “I promise it’s not a celebrity.”

“Then _who_?” Kurahashi pressed. “Somebody older? Somebody we _know_?”  

Takebayashi, who hadn’t seemed to be paying much attention to any of this, pushed his glasses properly back up his nose. “How do _you_ know, Nakamura san?”

“I suppose there’s no harm in giving you the details,” she said. “Remember that stupid party Maehara kun tried to get us all to go to?” Tomohito did remember it, and saying no to it since he had homework. “Well, I got bored, and decided to show up a bit later. I was looking around for people to talk to, and found Nagisa surrounded by some high schoolers. He didn’t do anything, but I told them to leave him alone. So I asked Nagisa if he was okay, and he was already drinking some sort of mixed drink they gave him. He didn’t seem too bad overall, so I let him slip off. When I came into the other room, he was making out with, um, _somebody_. They got up and went upstairs together, and I saw them lock the door. They definitely didn’t come out for the rest of the party, that I saw. But the timings make sense.”

Like it had been ripped from the back of his head, Tomohito remembered something, clear as day. “I asked him how the party was,” he said quietly. “Nagisa told me he was embarrassed that he fell asleep in a bathtub.”

“So they spent the night in a secluded room, by the sounds of it,” Nakamura summarised. “There’s some other evidence I’ve noticed too, but it’s pretty damming that-“

She stopped mid-sentence, the sound of the door sliding cutting her off. As Karma and Nagisa walked back into the classroom, everybody scrambled, trying to make it look far less like they’d been having a group discussion. Of course, Karma had a sharp eye, and instantly picked up on the awkward atmosphere.

“Whatcha talking about?”

“We’re planning on practicing some of our new skills this weekend,” Yada said, quickly and confidently. “We were just deciding on where to meet up so we can drill parkour.”

The rest of the class released a shared breath as Karma seemed to accept it, going to his own seat, and nothing else was said. When their afternoon lessons began, Tomohito couldn’t stop staring at his friend. He thought he was struggling with the preparations for midterms, and whether Kanzaki had actually waved at him or not the other day. How had he not noticed? He chewed his lip. Why hadn’t Nagisa just told him?

He didn’t manage to catch Nagisa before he left once the day was over, Karma closely at his side (like usual) as they walked off together. Despite not being _as_ creeped out by the guy as Tomohito had been, there was still something off putting there. Something inside him didn’t like the way, kind of possessive sometimes, that Karma looked at his friend. He hoped Nagisa knew what he was doing, spending so much time with him recently. And then, it was like Tomohito had a stroke of genius.

“Why don’t we try and listen to their conversation,” he said, once he was sure there was no way the pair could hear him.

Those remaining in the classroom regarded him. “That’s true,” Sugaya said. “If Karma is the only one Nagisa can confide in, he’s bound to mention it.”  

“You could try it,” Nakamura shrugged.

“We can meet outside early,” Maehara said. “And watch them be alone through the window. Itona kun, do you think we can add a microphone to your tank?”

He shrugged. “It should be easy!”

Tomohito slipped out, whilst they knuckled down the rest of the plan. Now he’d suggested it, he actually felt pretty bad about suggesting they _spy_. He forced it into the back of his mind once he was home, getting his school work and studying out of the way. Once he was done with that, and ready to sleep off the day, he considered texting Nagisa. It felt like something a good friend should do, but he couldn’t find the right words. Instead, he switched the device off, rolling over to shut his eyes.

As promised, he made sure to get to school extra early the next morning, where some of his classmates had already gathered, to make their preparations. Itona had his small tank, now fully equipped to capture audio, hidden behind Korosensei’s desk, completely set up. It was just the waiting game, after that. As more people joined their little stake out, _finally_ Nagisa walked into the class building, like normal.

Apart from a small sense of thrill, it wasn’t that interesting to watch. For around ten minutes, he was just sat at his desk, quietly doing homework. Tomohito was just starting to think none of this was worth it, when finally Karma walked in too. You could smell the anticipation in the air, practically.

“Yo,” Karma said, voice a grainy quality due to the microphone.

Nagisa looked up at him and smiled. “Morning, Karma kun.”

“What’s that?” He asked, pulling up what was technically Maehara’s chair to face opposite to him.

“Just math homework.”

Karma snatched it out of his hands, reading it over, before looking at Nagisa seriously. “These answers are _shocking_ , even for you.”

Nagisa tensed. “It would be a lot easier to focus if _your demon baby_ didn’t keep kicking me every five seconds.”

Beside him, Kayano gasped loudly, clapping her hands over her mouth, which knocked Tomohito out of the immersion. He wasn’t quite sure what was so dramatic, but the action inside was more interesting. Karma stood up from his seat, crouching down closer to Nagisa as he said something gently, too soft for the microphone to pick up.

“Well,” Nakamura said, “there you have it.”

Wait. What?! It suddenly dawned on Tomohito that Nagisa had said the word ‘your’, to Karma. Huh? There was no way – Nagisa and Karma?! They were just _friends_. Sure they spent a lot of time together, and Nagisa tended to talk about Karma a lot, and Karma looked at Nagisa funny, and they’d had the most dramatic and drawn out kiss during Bitch Sensei’s competition the other day… Tomohito’s eye twitched. He truly was blind.

“What a revelation,” a familiar voice cut his thoughts off.

“Korosensei?!”

Their teacher had managed to sneak up to watch the action with them without them noticing. “Quiet! I don’t want to miss it!”

Kataoka looked at him critically. “I’m surprised you’re encouraging this kind of thing.”

Korosensei’s face turned blue with sorrow. “Don’t you see? These last few weeks I’ve been in _anguish_!” He wailed. “I’m totally trapped between my responsibilities as a teacher, and…” he looked down, his expression turning to one of shame, “my love for scandal and gossip.”

“He’s a terrible example,” Kimura said.

Hayami lowered her head. “A poor excuse for an educator.”

“It’s not like this was something anything I said could fix!” Korosensei swiftly defended, zipping around the small group that had gathered. “They can’t take back the situation! I could only advise!”

“Such advice,” Okano muttered.

“Why are you guys all gathered out here?” Karma said, leaning out of the now open window. It was enough to stop Korosensei from moving frantically, at least. Tomohito swallowed, wondering how long their cover had been blown for. Something told him Karma knew exactly what they were doing.

“Just a small pre-class nature lesson on the autumn foliage!” Korosensei attempted to cover for them.

“Aw, and we weren’t invited?” Karma rolled his eyes.

Nakamura cleared her throat. “You didn’t miss much.”

“I’ll bet.”

Shamefully, they left their stake out position, going round to enter the classroom properly for the day. Although Tomohito’s mind wouldn’t stop swirling, nobody else outwardly appeared too bothered by the revelation. If anything, a few people looked almost satisfied. Tomohito just didn’t know how he’d missed all of this significance. The day surprisingly continued as normal, until the end of it. He really needed to speak to Nagisa.

“Nagisa kun,” he quickly approached his desk before Nagisa had finished packing up his stuff. “Uhm, want to walk home together today?”

Though he didn’t specifically say it, Nagisa seemed to realise that Tomohito definitely meant ‘alone’. Gracefully as ever, he smiled. “That sounds like fun.”

Although he felt his eyes on his back as they left together, Karma didn’t make any kind of protest. It made Tomohito wonder what the actual depth of their relationship was. Once he and Nagisa had made it far enough so that nobody would overhear them, it was the first thing got out.

“Are you and Karma dating?”

Nagisa stopped in his tracks, his face turning slightly red. “No, it’s not like that.”

 _Then what was it like then?!_ “B-but you’re-“

“Sugino kun,” Nagisa said seriously, “I, uhm, I’m really sorry for not telling you about all of this.” As if to emphasise his point, he bowed lightly. “I promise I was going to, but I couldn’t figure out the right way,” he played with his loose shirt sleeve. “I guess now I don’t have to. Karma kun and I aren’t an _item_ , and we won’t ever be, despite everything. I-I understand if you don’t want to hang around with me anymore-“

“No!” Tomohito said quickly. None of this had even made him consider losing Nagisa as a friend through his own will. “It’s fine.”

Nagisa looked up, hope shining in his eyes. “ _Really_?”

Tomohito felt his confidence return. “You’re not going to just talk about baby stuff _all the time_ now, right?”

“Of course not!” Nagisa rushed. “No, not unless you ask or something.”

“Then nothing too much has changed,” Tomohito smiled, though he couldn’t escape the thought that Nagisa would be opposite him with an actual baby in his arms, in just a few months’ time. That was an alien concept, if he ever knew one. “Let’s go home.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case you somehow missed it, this story is now a series! After so many requests for it, and now you have the final sort of piece of the story from Nakamura in this chapter, I decided to write what actually happened as a sort of part two, so please check that out! I made it a separate story, mainly because I don't want to add underage tags to THIS story, but also, my style of writing is more 'we should only know what the characters know'. But if you're curious, there you have it! 
> 
> Sasuki Takumi is not intended to replicate a real person. He's just a fake, famous pop singer in this universe. 
> 
> Your comments and kudos only inspire me to write faster! A lot, lot, LOT of drama ahead!


	18. Lesson Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a parkour mishap, the E Class have to help out at a pre-school for two weeks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took me a little longer than I'd have liked, but as a bonus, it's twice the length of a normal chapter! I really liked this one.

_“Dad?” Nagisa stood in the hallway, rubbing his eyes, a blanket draped around him. It was the middle of the night, far past his bedtime, but it was impossible to sleep over all the shouting. “Where are you going?”_

_He sighed and walked over, crouching down to Nagisa’s height. “Just for a small walk.”_

_Nagisa trembled. “Why do you have so many bags?”_

_“Nagisa-“_

_“Where are you going?!” Tears started to form in the corner of his eyes. “Please don’t leave me here with mum. Please!”_

_He pushed the hair away from his face. “You’ll understand when you’re older.”_

_“Please!” Nagisa grabbed his arm desperately._

_Easily getting out of his grip, his father stood back up again, and picked up his bags. “I’ve already made up my mind.”_

_He couldn’t stop crying. “Why?” He choked._

_“I’ll see you really soon, okay?”_

_“Dad-“_

_“Will you be good for me? Promise, Nagisa.”_

_“I promise,” he whispered. His father was already out of the door before he was through the sentence, though._

* * *

At the shriek of his phone alarm, Nagisa jolted awake, and immediately wanted to bury himself under the covers. He was in too much of a cold sweat from the dream to consider going back to sleep, so it was much more of an instinctual reaction to hide from the danger, even if it was his own memory. As soon as Nagisa’s heartbeat calmed down some, the physical discomfort was much more noticeable.

Groaning, he cringed as he pulled himself out of bed, shuffling to the bathroom as quickly as he could. The little demon thing inside him seemed to have most of their fun using his bladder as a punching bag, and it meant he had to pee far more than he ever had in his life. Even if there was nothing there _to_ pee, the need was very much there. Demon was an accurate description, he thought when he was done, rubbing his sore back.

“ _Akuma_ ,” he said softly, as the baby kicked at him in protest. It definitely wasn’t a name, but it felt a little better than referring to it as ‘his baby’ all the time. Yes, incredibly accurate. He’d barely gotten any sleep in, considering how badly _Akuma’s_ weight cut off his breathing if he lay flat. Nagisa had to think long and hard about why he’d even set his alarm for a weekend in the first place, until his brain finally caught up.

Well, a little assassination practice never hurt anybody. Trying to force himself into the land of the living as best he could, Nagisa pulled on the clothes with the most amount of room left in them. Even some of the things Karma had loaned him didn’t fit anymore, but the large sweatshirt still seemed to swallow him while. He found himself not minding too much about that, being surrounded in comforting scent.

Nagisa’s plan to leave quietly was foiled pretty soon, running into Toboso the second he stepped outside of the bedroom. “Ah, Nagisa san,” the butler bowed, “my apologies.”

“It was my fault,” Nagisa replied politely.

He raised an eyebrow. “Going out without breakfast? Nagisa san, if I may, that’s not a good idea for you. I’ll make you something.”

With still an amount of time left before Nagisa really had to go out to meet his friends, and the tell tale clenching of his stomach, he didn’t argue about the offer. Though Toboso had said time and time again that as a guest of Asano, he was only really doing his job, it made Nagisa shift uncomfortably. Asano had demanded nothing out of him, and it had been months now, but he still needed that barrier of mistrust there as protection.

“Is soup and rice alright?” He asked, once Nagisa had followed him into the kitchen.

“Thanks.” What Nagisa really wanted right then was a heavy crepe full of chocolate, strawberries, and whipped cream, but the plainer option was probably the healthier choice. He sat himself down, whilst Toboso cooked, naturally in his element. There was no sign of Asano around, despite the smell of food within the house, which would usually lure him out.

As if he could read his mind, Toboso sighed. “It must be exam time. Gakushu would have wasted away years ago if I didn’t bring food right to his door.”

Thinking about it, Asano seemed to have a weirdly intimate relationship with his butler. “Has Asano kun always been like this?”

“Mmm,” Toboso turned, placing the food in front of Nagisa.

“Thanks for the food,” Nagisa said, before tucking in.

“Without speaking too out of turn,” the butler continued, “Gakushu and his father have a… strained relationship. Even when he was a child, after his mother left, nothing was accepted but success. Truthfully, Gakushu exists only as a shadow.”

Nagisa swallowed. That seemed hard. At the same time, it was a feeling he could relate to. His own mother only wanted Nagisa to exist in the ideal way she saw him, and the second he went against it, he was discarded. The less Nagisa thought about it the better, which wasn’t hard with everything else distracting him. Perhaps that was why Asano threw himself into school so fiercely.

Once he’d finished his meal, he thanked Toboso once again, and finally left the house. He made it to where everyone had agreed to meet in good time, and although most were already there, he technically wasn’t late, which was an achievement. Everybody was just stretching out and discussing their plans for the day, so he hadn’t missed much.

“So we’re racing over the buildings to the station?” He overheard Nakamura say. “Sweet.”  

Although Nagisa had technically been taught the techniques to do that, the thought made him somewhat nervous. Karasuma had always been there to spot them if they made a misstep, and he knew the terrain of the roofs far less than he knew the mountain. Considering his athletic skill was diminished, Nagisa decided it was better to just sit this part out.

“They’re gonna get in trouble~” Karma said beside him.

Nagisa startled slightly, since he hadn’t noticed him arrive. “Really?”

Karma shrugged. “Karasuma sensei specifically told them no parkour out of class. If he catches them doing it so openly, then well…”

“You _care_?”

“I don’t,” Karma confirmed. “But I have better things to do. Want to grab some coffee?”

Nagisa didn’t really understand how coffee with him was better than racing everyone above the town, but he didn’t complain. “Sure. Since when have you liked coffee?”

“Okay,” he admitted, “it’s more like ‘let’s go to a coffee place so I can try a new drink flavour’.”

 “So nothing in it for me,” he said dryly.

Karma wrapped an arm around his shoulders, in what could be a nice gesture or the start of a headlock. “There’s always the pleasure of my company.”

“ _Pleasure_.”

“My my,” he said lightly, “ _you’re_ in a bad mood.”

Nagisa sighed. “I’m sorry.”

Karma stilled for a second. “Let’s go get those drinks.”

With nothing further to add, Nagisa agreed, and they went to one of their usual places. Admittedly, when Karma bought him a serving of the new strawberry flavoured concoction, his mood sky rocketed. This was a lot better than the parkour, definitely. He wondered if this was the kind of thing Karma did when he skipped lessons.

Once they were satisfied (Akuma seemed to be resting after finally getting the strawberries), they decided to just take a walk to the station and meet with the others. They were bound to have finished at least a few circuits, at least. Walking slowly, they caught sight of their classmates above, rushing around like it was nothing.

Most civilians weren’t paying them any attention, until there was a sickening crash. With their extended vantage point, the students on the roof came to a swift pause. Nagisa looked at Karma with mild alarm.

Karma shrugged. “I told you something bad would happen.”

As quickly as he could, Nagisa rushed forward, catching a glimpse of what had happened. The rest of their class had gathered around an older man, lying pained on the ground beside a messed up bike. His best guess was that they’d somehow run into him, and it had ended up in injury. That definitely wasn’t good.

“Let’s get out of here,” Karma said quickly.

“Why?” Nagisa looked at him. “We should help.”

“We’ll only get in trouble,” he rationalised, “and we weren’t doing anything wrong.”

Nagisa hesitated.

“Fine,” Karma said casually. “I’ll see you later.”

As soon as he’d disappeared, the sound of ambulance sirens filled the small alleyway. Nagisa still didn’t know what had happened in all the confusion as the unconscious man was carried away. There was a certain amount of dread in everyone’s eyes. As if to add to the atmosphere, everyone’s phones buzzed.

Nagisa looked down at his messages, from an unknown ID.

>I will see you outside the hospital emergency department.

Given that everybody had received one, there weren’t too many options over who could have sent it. The likely answer was Karasuma, as it was his word everybody had gone against. Nobody even thought about skipping out from going, silently taking off in the direction of the hospital. The mood was incredibly sour.

“Are you sure you want to go Nagisa kun?” Kayano asked him on the way. “You weren’t involved.”

“I would have been,” Nagisa admitted, “if I could. I should share whatever punishment we get.”

Sure enough, Karasuma was waiting for them outside the hospital, once they reached it (entirely from walking normally). He looked _pissed._ “A hairline fracture of the right femur,” he announced. “It’s mild enough that he should be up and walking in a week or so, but given that you kids are a state secret, my men are negotiating a gag order and an out of court settlement.”

A sudden whoosh of the wind revealed their teacher, face completely black with rage.

“K-korosensei,” Isogai stammered.

Kimura looked down. “B-but it was such a narrow street.”

“Who’d ever expect an old man to be riding his bike down there?” Okajima justified.

“He’s right.” Okuda said.

Yada begun. “I do think what we did was wrong…”

“But we did it to sharpen up our skills,” Nakamura finished.

“You just don’t get the pressure and panic of having to save the earth,” Terasaka added.

Before anybody else could make an excuse, Korosensei sped around them at Mach 20, delivering a harsh slap to each of their cheeks. It _stung_.

“Will you report that as injuring the students?” Korosensei turned to ask Karasuma quietly.

“I’ll overlook it this once,” Karasuma agreed. “I knew the risks when I introduced that high level training… It may have been too soon for you after all. It’s my fault.”

He turned to go back inside, and Nagisa felt his stomach drop. It was hard, to hear Karasuma blame himself for something that was clearly not his doing like that. It was down to their stupidity, not his.

“Sensei… we’re sorry.” Kimura finally said.

Everybody joined in, bowing their heads in apology.

“You may have grown too strong. Drunk on your own power, you forgot to put yourselves in the shoes of someone weaker than you. That makes you no different from the students on the main campus.” He held up one of their textbooks, and tore it in two. “The midterms are now exactly two weeks away. I forbid any of you from studying for them. It’s not a punishment. There are simply other things you should be studying first. I’m responsible, too, for having forgotten to teach them.”

Eventually, they were let inside, and it was hard to look at that crippled man’s face. Still, they had to do what was right, and all extended as sincere an apology as they could to him, lead in by Korosensei. The man didn’t look too pleased, though, and who could blame him? All they could do was say they were sorry, though.

“Do they know their task?” He finally said, addressing Korosensei.

Their teacher nodded rapidly. “Yes! Class, in Matsukata san’s place, you will be assisting with the running of the pre-school until he recovers.”

Huh? Pre-school? Was that what Korosensei meant, in place of studying? Well, there was much worse tasks out there. Nobody really complained, dismissed after that with only the address of the school. They were all pretty much doomed for midterms, Nagisa realised by the time he returned to the Asano residence. If Asano was studying _this_ hard to make sure the E Class didn’t beat him again, it turned out there was no need.

There was no sign of him, even the next morning, so Nagisa didn’t have a chance to mention it. The pre-school wasn’t too far away, and he arrived on time with the rest of his classmates. It seemed that regardless of his involvement, Karma had received the punishment as well, as he gathered with the rest of the group.

“Listen to this, children!” The one helper working there announced. “Principal Matsukata has been hurt, so he can’t work for a while.”

The group of children, most under five years old, looked at each other in confusion.

“So instead,” she continued, “these young men and women will do anything we need for the next two weeks!”  

After she’d finished speaking, it was like the floodgates. Small children launched their attack, and Nagisa genuinely thought they could have won. There was no time to come up with any sort of strategy, they may as well be defenceless. Nagisa felt genuinely overwhelmed, unsure of what to do as two of them tugged on his clothes for attention.

Like she had some sort of power over her troops, one girl cleared her throat, and the rest of the kids cleared off. “So what exactly are you planning to do for us, now? Barging in on us _en masse_ … Reckon you can at least work off the oxygen you’re taking up?”

Given the whispers from her fellow classmates, she definitely had the control.

Before anybody could say anything, she quickly grabbed hold of a broom, threatening Nagisa with it like a sword. “First, have you got what it takes to work? Let’s just see, shall we, huh?”

“Hey, uh-“

The girl took a step forwards, but the wood gave out under her foot, causing her to fall through the floor.

“That part of the floor is no good,” one of them said.

“Aren’t you getting it fixed?” Isogai asked the staff member. “ I mean… this building is pretty decrepit.”

“We don’t have the money,” she said wistfully. “Any waitlisted student, any child not attending primary school – our principal takes them in at rock bottom rates. He can’t even hire enough staff, so he winds up working the hardest.”

“Twenty eight of us for two weeks…” Maehara said. “I bet we could get some stuff done.”

Hara agreed. “Sure we could!”

“Okay guys,” Isogai addressed them. “Let’s divvy up the duties and work in his stead! First a strategy meeting!”  

“Got it!” Everyone responded.

Nagisa bent down, pulling the little girl out of the hole. “Are you okay?”

She folded her arms and shrugged him off. “Didn’t hurt. Aren’t you going with your friends.”

“Hm,” Nagisa tried lightly, “I’d rather hang out with you, if that’s okay?”

Though her demeanour clearly shifted, body language becoming more open, her tone didn’t change. She huffed, still not facing him. “I guess I can’t stop you.”  

He sat himself down. “What were you playing before?”

“I wasn’t playing.”

Nagisa decided to change his tactic. The girl still seemed stone cold. “Did I overhear that you weren’t at school? What are you doing here, then?”

She finally turned around, looking him suspiciously in the eye. “What’s it to you? Anyway, these kids would be nowhere without their leader.”

“Leader, huh?”

“I am the oldest,” she stated. “I bet I’m better at it than _you…_ I don’t know your name.”

Nagisa smiled. “I bet. It’s Nagisa, by the way.”

“Sakura,” she replied, a small amount of salt leaving her tone.

Before they could continue their conversation, the rest of the E Class returned from their conversation. Nagisa had no real preference what job he was given, so he was okay with having missed the meeting. He could always get the details after.

“Nagisa kun,” Isogai came over to him. “We put you on helping out with studying, if that’s okay.”

He looked at the girl. “Sakura chan? Want some help?”

“Sure, whatever.”

Nagisa picked himself up as she wondered off to get one of her study books. He had no real idea how to help with studying. Some subjects he only just grasped himself, and explaining them, to a child no less, felt out of his reach. He sat down beside Sakura at a table, flipping through the maths book she’d given him. By the looks of it, she was far behind for her age.

“Make it snappy, Nagisa!” She demanded. “Weren’t you supposed to get me to Tokyo University?!”

“S-sorry.”

“Hmph.”

“Uh, hey,” he tried, “you never said why you weren’t going to school.”

“Huh?” She eyed him suspiciously. “Bullying, of course, bullying – the typical, stupid kind! I don’t get people… Kids that age should be innocent and sweet. But once they get a little bigger and stronger, I guess they use that strength to hurt people. You’re thinking it too, aren’t you? ‘Don’t run away’. ‘If you don’t like it, go to school and get stronger yourself’. Just like Mama and Papa say. Well, you look weaker than me, so you probably don’t understand.”

Nagisa didn’t know what to say. This girl, even though she was so young, spoke with far more maturity than he’d ever heard from a child before. He was still figuring some of this stuff out for himself, yet Sakura seemed so certain. Underneath her exterior, Sakura seemed like a nice kid. Before he could even formulate an answer for her, a commotion outside caught their attention.

She stood up sharply. “Aren’t you coming?”

He supposed he had to follow her. When they came outside, Kurahashi and a group of the kids were gathered around a tree. Nagisa followed their eye levels, until he saw the kitten that seemed to stuck up there.

“See what happens when you pluck up the courage to climb? The higher you get, the more dangerous it is. What’s the harm in staying down on firm ground?” Sakura commented beside him.

Internally, Nagisa thought that sounded boring, when applied to all things. He’d grow restless if he never tried to work for anything, aim higher. Of course, Sakura had no way of knowing the weight of the task the E Class had been given, the goal to save the entire planet. It was a mentality that had been driven into all of them.

A few meters away, it seemed like Okajima and Kimura were coming up with a plan, gearing up to use their skills for good. There was no doubt the kitten would be rescued.

Suddenly, a thought popped into his head, as they made their preparations. “Sakura chan, if that treetop is school, and the ground is this place here… we all found our strength down on the ground. While looking up…” Nagisa said as Kimura used Okajima to vault up to the tree, “…and getting looked down on, we learned plenty about how scary heights were before we started climbing. That’s why we can go our own way now. Still… somewhere along the way we forgot our fear of heights, so we do still fall to the ground every now and then. So learn here. You can go to school once you have a game plan.” Nagisa bent down to her level and took her hand. “That’s my secret lesson, from me to you. Now let’s go work on that maths, shall we?”

By the time the day was over, Nagisa was all mathed out. Still, somehow, it didn’t seem like much of a challenge to get through. Once Sakura had opened up to him, time appeared to fly past. Some of the others were helping the build the place up, though most were providing entertainment to the kids. It was definitely a group effort. Out of the corner of his eye, he briefly noticed Karma surrounded by a bunch of them, apparently using him as climbing apparatus. For some reason, it surprised him that he seemed to be so good with kids.

It wasn’t until he got back that the tiredness finally hit him. All Nagisa wanted to do was crawl under the sheets and sleep for about a week. Suddenly, he had a lot of respect for those who did this regularly, as a career. Small kids really were hard work. An uncomfortable knot tied in Nagisa’s stomach, at that thought. Before he could delve into it too much, he sensed another presence.

“Rumour has it the E Class are skipping school,” Asano said seriously. “Right before exams.”

Nagisa swallowed. There was no way he could tell the full truth. “Our teacher set us up with a community project,” he settled with.

“Hm,” Asano’s eyes were pure steel. “Is this cockiness? Or plain stupidity.”

“There are no bets this time around,” he said.

“Still…” the alpha swallowed, and then rolled his eyes. “Come on. You still need to study. Come with me.”

Nagisa was tired, and in no mood to study, but he followed anyway, for some reason.

* * *

_“Hey,” Nagisa rubbed his eyes, stepping out of the bedroom._

_“Good morning!” A small girl with hair the colour of the outer rings of fire rushed up, burying her face into his stomach._

_Naturally, Nagisa bent down to her level, hugging her back. “Did you have nice dreams?”_

_“Mm,” she let him go, dancing around excitedly. “I dreamt that daddy made me the best pancakes ever and ever in the world, and I told him, and now I’m gonna get pancakes!”_

_Nagisa eyed up the kitchen. “That’s awfully nice of him.”_

_“Well,” she said, “I asked real real polite.”_

_“It’s true,” Karma said, emerging from the kitchen with his hair clipped back off his face, a bowl of presumably pancake mix in his arms._

_“Do I get pancakes?” Nagisa stood up properly._

_Karma beamed. “Hm, for a small price, maybe.”_

_Nagisa rolled his eyes. “You’re unfair.” All the same, he stepped over to him, going up on his tip toes to press a sweet kiss on his cheek._

_“What do you think?” Karma looked down at the little girl. “Does he deserve some breakfast?”_

_“Hmmm,” she said. “I think so!”_

* * *

Nagisa woke up, instantly feeling uncomfortable, moreso about this dream that reliving his own childhood trauma. It had felt so _real_. As if to remind him, Akuma gave him a few sharp kicks. Perhaps it was a sign they would turn out to be a girl. He dressed himself, ready to face the final day at the nursery. In the two weeks that had passed, Nagisa had actually found himself having a really good time. As all the building and improvements had gone on around them, he’d become proud that they were doing this much to help out. These kids definitely deserved it.

He was practically overjoyed when Sakura was nowhere to be found. They’d gone over their strategy a few times, but Nagisa hadn’t been entirely certain if she’d actually pluck up the courage. There was still the possibility she’d managed to stay at home, but he hoped she was busy at school. Having spent most of his time with her, it also meant Nagisa didn’t immediately have anything to do.

Seeing their opportunity, he was flocked the moment he placed himself somewhere, mostly by the girls, who were naturally a little bit less energetic and more willing to sit down. After a flurry of requests, which were hard to focus on individually, they settled down marginally.

“ _Nagisa_ ~,” one said, “will you do my hair like yours?”

“No fair I wanted to play with Nagisa!”

“Do mine first!”

He was not prepared for this situation. “How about we take it in turns?”

They blinked.

Nagisa shuffled behind the girl who had asked first, and swiftly replicated his hair style on her own head. Though he hadn’t done it on somebody else before, he was so used to the repeating the motions, it didn’t look too askew. It wasn’t something he put much thought to, and was much messier than the style the girl had arrived wearing.

She looked in a small, toy mirror, and grinned. “Thank you!”

“Me next!”

Within minutes, a small queue had formed. It was a little weird, once he was making progress, to see so many tiny heads mimicking him. In another sense, it was a little cute. He wasn’t really doing much, yet they seemed so happy.

“What’s this, huh? Nagisa kun’s salon?” Nagisa looked up to see Karma standing above him. “You’re stealing all my fans.”

“Do it on Karma too!” A dark haired girl requested.

“Yeah! Make him look pretty!”

Karma shrugged, slumping to the ground. “Girls’ orders.”

Nagisa swallowed. Styling Karma’s hair felt a little different than a bunch of kids’. Still, he forced himself to remember, it was just _hair_. The other girls had their own hair ties, so Nagisa had to take his hair down, letting it fall to his shoulders as he flexed the elastic between his fingers. Tentatively, he reached out, threading Karma’s fire truck red hair between his fingers. It was surprisingly silky to the touch. Nagisa focused, pulling the much shorter locks into something that resembled bunches.

“How do I look?” He turned, once Nagisa was done.

His resolve crumbled, if he ever even had one to begin with.  Nagisa giggled, admiring how ridiculous he looked. His hair resembled tiny bat wings.

“How cute!” One of the girls said.

“Nagisa looks cute with his hair down!” Another noticed.

He hadn’t really thought out it, when he took his ties out. Suddenly self-conscious, Nagisa folded his arms over himself. He _hated_ how he looked with his longer hair exposed fully, how much it felt like the style of a girl.

“Hmm,” Karma said, “but I’m cuter.”

Wait, was he indirectly implying something like a compliment? A twisted, kind of humiliating compliment, but that was just Karma’s style. Nagisa felt his face heat up, and immediately needed to stop himself, and any stray _thoughts_ that might creep in. Karma was just messing with him. Before he could dwell on it too hard, they were both signalled over.

Principal Matsukata had made a full recovery, and was being shown all their improvements. Joining the rest of the class for the final part of the tour, Nagisa noticed the man wore the same grouchy expression. Still, there was something about him that seemed lighter, like he definitely did appreciate the work the class had done to the run down centre.

Something else grabbed Nagisa’s attention, in the middle of their speech.

“Hey! Nagisa!” Sakura said, rushing up with an exam paper. “Ta-da! I came in second!”

“Wow, that’s great!” Nagisa replied with genuine excitement. “Well done!”

“I did just what you said! I came in only for my math test, like a sneak attack. I finished my test and left.”

He bent down to her level, reciting his own idea. “And in the middle of a test, the bullies couldn’t do a thing.”

“Yep! Apart from the teacher, I didn’t tell anybody I was leaving!”

“Using your best attack _before_ your opponent can get into position: that’s how we fight in the E Class, Sakura chan. Keep on using those hit and run tactics, and you’ll have more weapons at your disposal in school.”

“Th-then…” she looked down. “You’ll teach me again sometime, right?”

“Of course!” He beamed. Something in him yearned for the girl to succeed, after everything.

Principal Matsukata cleared his throat. “You all run back to school, now. You have some important work to attend to.”

Their midterms were over and done with in a blur. Nagisa’s tactic had been to not think about it, too much. He just put pen to paper, and wrote as fast and accurately as he could. By the time the exams were over, it was like a breath of fresh air. There weren’t so many stakes resting on it, so the tension was a lot less. That was, until everyone was handed their results, and the atmosphere was nothing short of depressing.

Nagisa left that day with Sugino and Okajima at his side, both looking solidly depressed with their papers. Nobody had been too eager to compare results, so Nagisa kept his pressed firmly to his chest. The less they knew about it, the better.

“What a let down. Guess that first time was just a fluke, eh?” Araki Teppei, one of the members of the five virtuosos, said. The rest of them blocked their path, as they entered the main campus.

“We didn’t even _need_ to smash you at pole toppling.” Seo referenced one of their earlier competitions.

Nagisa swallowed down his secrets.

“Cat got your tongue? That’s not surprising.” Koyama added.

Sakakibara shrugged. “At this school, grades are everything. Those on the bottom have no right speaking to those on the top.”

“Eh? Then you can’t say anything to me, now, can you?” Like he’d manifested out of the shadows or something, Karma appeared behind them, his presence fearful, as he waved his papers, stating he’d managed to come second out of their entire year. “I mean, our teacher’ll probably be like, ‘it doesn’t count if you didn’t come in _first_.’ Hasn’t it dawned on you? I’m the only one who gave it my all this time around. Everyone else was pulling their punches for you. Said you’d have no standing if you kept on losing.”

“ _What_?!” Four of the A Class said.  

Maybe it was just a result of spending so much time with him, but Nagisa could sense something was off about Asano. It was as if there was a twinge in the air, like the smell of rusted steel. It made him shudder at the thought of what could be coming.

“That’s nice and all,” Asano finally spoke up, before Karma could turn away, “but you’re incorrect. In fact, it would be unfair to give yourself the only credit. It takes a lot of work for some people to come tenth overall… Right, _Nagisa kun_?”

In some sort of state of mutual shock, all eyes turned to Nagisa’s form. He couldn’t help put tremble, feeling highly on display. It was almost hilarious, the best grade he’d achieved in his life was his own personal nightmare. He wanted to hide, to run away and disappear. It felt as if it was tattooed onto his forehead – ‘2nd in the E Class, 10th Overall.’

“I-is it true?” Sugino asked.

Okajima blinked. “ _How_?”

Asano cut in, before Nagisa could answer for himself. “My skills as a tutor, of course. Even the E Class isn’t completely hopeless.”

Seo squinted. “What? You tutored _preggo_ over there!?”

“No need to be like that,” Asano waved him off. “Who cares, he has some kind of brain, at least. Hey, Nagisa kun,” he spoke in a tone he never usually used, during their conversations, “come hang out with us. You’ve proved you’re better than these losers.”

And there it was. Nagisa had known, known for _months_ , that in accepting Asano’s offer, he’d sold his soul to the devil. Of course he’d waited till now, the perfect moment, to cash it in. And he knew it, Nagisa had no choice but to go along with whatever Asano asked of him. Nagisa’s debt was far too big. He had nowhere else to go. It was stupid. He’d been in chains all along, but forced himself to remain as ignorant to them as possible.

“You’re not serious,” Okajima said, as Nagisa took a step forwards.

Nagisa wanted to scream that he was sorry, and that he didn’t mean any of this, but instead he just lowered his head.

“ _Nagisa_?” Sugino asked.

Karma, it seemed, had already walked off, not interested in sticking around for this betrayal.

Taking the deepest breath he could, Nagisa moved away from his friends. “Sure,” he met Asano’s eyes.

Asano smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Time for a Japanese lesson! Akuma (悪魔, or あくまphonetically), literally means 'demon'. It is not a name, of any sort. So when Nagisa was thinking the baby was like a demon, that's the word that stuck. Because Nagisa is using it AS a name, I'm not translating the word for the rest of the fic (like how Sakura is a word in Japanese in its own right, but is being used as a name here too), but just keep in mind that when you see the word in the future, that's what it means. And no, the baby won't actually be stuck with that name once they're born :') 
> 
> Also, I just wanted to address that Nagisa's second dream is literally that - a dream. Whether their child ends up looking anything like that, well... I guess you're gonna have to stick around for some more chapters :D 
> 
> As always, comments only encourage me to write faster!


	19. Reaper Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With Bitch Sensei missing, Class 3E have to follow the great assassin known as The Reaper's command.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING - POTENTIALLY TRIGGERING CONTENT AHEAD
> 
> If you have any strong triggers, you may want to stop reading at the point they enter the bunker. For the sake of spoilers, I'll add a summary of what happens during that part of the chapter in the end notes. Please make sure you're reading at your own discretion.

Even though Nagisa had known the weight of his actions, and thought that he was prepared for the backlash, the reality was far worse. He’d almost have preferred it if there had been a giant confrontation. But no, instead, simply nobody had spoken to Nagisa at all. It wasn’t even as if everyone had been there, when Nagisa followed Asano’s order, though he couldn’t exactly blame them for spreading what had happened. Or the subsequent reaction. Nagisa was a traitor.

He was almost, sickeningly, a little grateful that they had Bitch Sensei’s problems to deal with. If buying flowers and trying to set her up with Karasuma was going to take the focus away from him, then Nagisa was surely here for it. Unfortunately, things hadn’t gone to plan, and their teacher had been more than mad. Nobody had seen her for days.

“Day three, huh?” Chiba said, when she didn’t show up for their English lesson.

“Maybe we went too far,” Yada thought.

Korosensei, dressed up in something ridiculous, leaned over by the window. “Call me if anything happens with Irina Sensei. I’ve got to get to Brazil to take in a football match. Samba-bye!”

“That’s right –“ Maehara started,  “he’d had his mind set on attending that game for a while now. He’s your typical once every four years fan.”

Kataoka looked down. “I wonder if Bitch Sensei’s okay.”

“No good,” Yada said after attempting to call her number, “I can’t get through.”

That sounded… suspicious.

Surprisingly, it was Ritsu who spoke up. “There’s no sign of her on GPS or public surveillance cameras.”

That was definitely alarming. Sure, Bitch Sensei locking herself up to mope for a few days sounded like her exact response to a situation like this, but this was all adding up far too much to just be normal. Then again, she had looked extremely hurt, at everything. Perhaps they’d been underestimating the extent.

“She wouldn’t leave over something like this, would she?” Chiba asked, almost rhetorically.

“That’s not it,” the man who had sold them the bouquet of flowers for Bitch Sensei the other day entered their classroom. “There’s still something you need her to do.”

“Right?” Fuwa said. “And besides, it’s fun having her around.”

“Yes, you’ve bonded nicely, you and her,” he said, setting down the flowers he carried. “My preliminary research has already verified that much. All I’ll do is exploit that.”

Wait. This wasn’t right. Why was this man here, saying such threatening things? Nagisa felt a chill run through his whole body, and sickness boil in his chest.

“I’m the assassin known as The Repaer,” he said, like it was nothing. “And now I have a lesson for you all. A flower’s beauty negates human caution and opens the heart. But the original reason flowers evolved to be so lovely and fragrant – Ritsu, bring up the image I sent you – was to attract insects.”

The image pulled up on Ritsu’s screen was nothing short of horrifying. So horrifying, in fact, Nagisa hardly believed it was real, much like something out of a thriller movie or a video game. There was no mistaking it, though. That was their teacher, beaten and chained up like a torture victim. He almost threw up.

“I’ll cut to the chase,” the Reaper continued, “If you want to keep her alive you must _all_ come to the location I specify – and not a word to your teachers. You don’t have to if you don’t want to. I can send her to you. To each of you. Equally. In little pieces. And my next flower will likely be one of you.”

“Hey, now, buddy,” Terasaka, apparently uncaring that he was up against the most famous assassin, “we have no real obligation to save that bossy bitch. Plus… did you think we wouldn’t give you a beat down, right here, you kidnapper?“

The reaper just smiled. “That’s incorrect, Terasaka kun. Wrong on all counts. You all like her more than you think. And a human could never cut down The Reaper. Fear not. The Reaper only cuts people down.”

As if nature itself obeyed his command, wind gathered. Nagisa found himself blinking in the intensity of it, and like that, the Reaper was _gone_. The only evidence he’d even been there in the first place were the flowers, swirling in the gust out of the window. Lovro had been right, all that time ago. That definitely was the world’s best, a whole other level to anything they’d faced before. 

Isogai bent down to pick up something, a sheet of paper that had apparently been left. “’Come as a class to the location on the map before six tonight.’” He read aloud.

“Just like with Takaoka and Shiro,” Chiba said. “They must be looking to take us hostage and draw out Korosensei.”  

Sugino slammed his fist down on his desk. “Damnit!”

“We using these?” Terasaka said casually, holding up their new PE clothes.

They had been a gift from the government. Though their class referred to them as PE clothes, in reality they were armour worthy of the field. Built with some of the best technology out there, it wasn’t a light gift to receive. It kind of gave Nagisa the feeling that the urgency of everything was hiking up, and reminded him of how little time was really left.

 “To protect someone, right?” Nakamura said.

Terasaka nodded. “Greatest assassin or not, we won’t let his plans go off without a hitch!”  

“Just one issue.” Nakamura pointed towards Nagisa, and everyone’s eyes followed.

They didn’t have to say it. The shift in the atmosphere was more than telling enough. Loud and clear, everyone was thinking the same thing. Nagisa was too much of a liability, worse than useless. He hadn’t immediately thought about it, the desperation to save their teacher from that danger clouding almost everything else. Regardless of it all, there was no way Nagisa could live with himself if they did nothing.

“He requested all of us,” Nagisa said, finally. “Twice over. We can’t just leave Bitch Sensei to that monster.”

The silence was uncomfortable. Nagisa wasn’t magically forgiven, despite this do or die situation. He swallowed, knowing that nobody had much of a solution.

“M-maybe he wouldn’t notice if Nagisa didn’t come,” somebody said, quietly.

Isogai cleared his throat. “I doubt it, he wouldn’t have emphasised it otherwise.”

Kayano stood up. “I-I know not everyone was there, but we saw Nagisa kun fight against Takaoka san. That was only a _couple_ of months ago. I don’t think he’s putting himself in any more danger than the rest of us. In terms of assassination, Nagisa kun is one of our best.”

Though he wasn’t sure if he actually believed all of what Kayano had said, Nagisa was thankful that at least somebody wasn’t treating him like an invalid.

“I agree with Kayano chan.”

Finally, the eyes turned to the back of the room, and Nagisa’s heart leapt through his throat.

Karma stood up properly. “A guy like that reaper? He has this planned down to a T. There’s no way around it, even if we wanted there to be. But,” he exhaled, “Kayano chan is right. In this, I trust Nagisa’s own judgement. There’s no way the rest of us could tell what his own body can handle.”

He was surprised, just a little. It seemed Karma’s views had changed significantly since that time on the island. There was no doubt he really had meant every word of that apology.

“I’ll do it,” Nagisa said. “As long as nobody spends extra time looking out for me. I know I can handle myself. Besides,” he tried to lighten it, “he wants us as a class, right? He probably won’t go after us individually.” Hopefully, anyway.

“Mm,” Okajima said. “A _class_.”

“Okajima kun,” Isogai warned, “there are far more important issues right now. So, we’re agreed?”

The atmosphere was still stiff, and nobody was about to just let Nagisa’s betrayal slide, but Isogai’s words at least meant people weren’t refusing to look at him anymore. There wasn’t much of a plan to make, given that they were far from having the upper hand in this, but they still discussed the precautions, before going their separate ways.

Once Nagisa had returned to the Asano residence, it felt like preparing for war. Unusually, against a very human and the most terrifying target at all. None of his assorted guns and knives would come much in handy, for this, though he knew Takebayashi and Okuda were coming up with something. All Nagisa had to do was adorn his PE clothes.

Their built in technology meant that they stretched to fit whoever was wearing it, to give the best protection no matter the conditions. Due to this, they turned out to be the most comfortable clothes Nagisa actually had access to. If they were more inconspicuous, Nagisa would consider wearing them all the time. In this condition, with the graveness of the situation, that joy was somewhat diminished.

The time came for Nagisa to leave, finally. He tried to be as silent as possible, not wanting anybody to notice his absence. Still, that didn’t stop luck being against him. The second he closed the bedroom door behind him, he instantly heard the sound of a second door.

“Where are you going, Nagisa kun?” Asano said, no obvious threat in his tone.

Nagisa didn’t trust that intuition at all, though, and he didn’t have time for this. “Just out for a class thing?”

“Dressed like that?” Asano took a few steps towards him. “You look like you’re about to join the army.”

“Don’t worry,” he said, “I’ll be back later tonight.”

Asano eyed him suspiciously. “Why would you want to go to a ‘class thing’ anyway? You’re better than them.”

That made Nagisa feel uncomfortable. He shuffled awkwardly. The only thing worse than hearing the usual A Class taunts would be to join in with them. Nagisa still had some pride left in him.

“Why are you so against them?”

“Why aren’t _you_?” Asano retorted. “Look, I know you’re all buddies on the surface, but really Nagisa. Are they your friends? They didn’t seem particularly pleased for your success. I know that if it were my friends who had exceeded all expectations, I’d feel nothing but pride and happiness for them.”

They _had_ been ignoring him for days, without even giving him the chance to defend himself… No. Nagisa wanted to punch himself for even buying into it for a second. Though, in some way, he wondered if Asano genuinely believed the words he was spouting. It didn’t look like Asano was just going to give up, and Nagisa didn’t have the time to wait out whatever he had to say.

Nagisa knew of two, sure fire techniques to stun a target and incapacitate them. His clap stunner move would be the easiest and quickest to execute, but it also relied on a few conditions. Nagisa didn’t have any kind of weapon in his hand, and even if he did, he assumed that Asano didn’t know the fear of near death like his other opponents had. That left Nagisa with only one option.

Before Asano could say anything else, Nagisa wove his way into his personal space. As quickly as he could physically move, he combined pacing light onto his tiptoes, and winding his arms around Asano’s neck to pull him more down to his level – he was around the same height as Karma. He just barely took in the stunned look in the other boy’s eyes as he sealed their lips together.

Asano didn’t respond much to Nagisa’s kiss, mostly passively letting it happen to him. In a sense, Nagisa was glad of it, as it made the mechanics of the kiss of death far easier to replicate. Within no more than five seconds, Asano’s arms slumped at his sides, pliant. It was easy for Nagisa to pry his mouth open with his own lips, slipping his tongue inside to seal the deal. When he started to feel Asano’s weight rest on him, Nagisa knew he was nearly done for. Just a little more, one finishing move… It didn’t need to be as _extreme_ as the trick he’d used to take Karma out. Nagisa pulled back as he would naturally, but captured Asano’s bottom lip between his teeth and tugged very lightly, before releasing him entirely.

 _Huh_ , he thought as Asano dropped to the floor like a puddle, _total overkill_. “I’m sorry about this,” Nagisa said anyway, stepping around his body to make his exit.

It turned out that the location the Reaper had marked out wasn’t so much in the middle of nowhere. Instead, it was something he’d probably walk past every day without questioning, quite like the assassin himself. From the outside, it just looked like a plain building, a bunker if Nagisa really had to describe it. Apparently, though, it was also a tomb.

 “Is that the way in?” Maehara said, staking out the location from the bushes.

“I did a loop around from above,” Itona said. “No sign of anyone in the area.”

“Ritsu,” Hara said, speaking into her copy of the phone app, “if we’re not back by midnight, tell Korosensei what’s going on.”  

“I will,” the AI agreed. “Stay safe, everyone.”

“Let’s go.” Isogai commanded.

Just like it was a regular drill, something they’d practised over and over like an art form, they approached the bunker silently. Once the door was opened easily, they flooded inside, stealth their key. It lead to an open, grey room.

“That’s all of you?” The voice of the Reaper asked from some kind of intercom. “Okay, then: I’m closing it up.”

On cue, the doors slid shut. They were locked in.

“Hmm,” Karma paced over to an area, as if he’d spotted something. “So you can tell what we’re doing? ‘Reaper’? More like ‘Peeper’.”

“We kept our end of the bargain!” Kataoka said. “Just give back Bitch Sensei and it’ll all be over!”

Below his two feet, the floor began to shake, and then Nagisa became very aware that they were traveling downwards. Even inside him, tiny kicks protested the sudden change of motion. Not only were they locked in, but they were going to be trapped underground. The technology seemed old and unsafe, but they made it to the bottom with only a small bit of debris.

“Trapping complete!” The Reaper stated. “Doing it all at once like this keeps the risk to a minimum.”

Three of the walls appeared solid, but the forth was like metal bars, though far too tightly packed for anybody to consider slipping between them. It was also likely the most secure part of the trap. Everybody else seemed to have the same thought, and began punching the walls in the attempt to find some sort of escape route.

“Bitch sensei!” 

“It’s alright,” the Reaper said casually, “of he comes quietly, no one gets killed.”

“If we go the defiant route…” Okajima stepped up to the bars, “you won’t get mad enough to kill?”

“Nope.” The Reaper confirmed. “You’re a little too scared, even for a kid.”

Okajima kept the charade up. “Actually, I’m a little relieved.”  

“Here! It sounds hollow here!” Somebody shouted.

They all knew what to do, on that cue. Without haste, a small bomb was attached to the spot, with a detonator time of just a few seconds. They stepped back to prevent from being hit by anything. At the sound of the bomb, Okuda threw one of the smoke screen capsules she’d crafted, obscuring them from any cameras. In under the space of the minute, the entire class had made their escape.

 “Now for the moment of truth.” Maehara said, as they went out into the open space. It didn’t look like much, just a gigantic, open network of tunnels.

“Can you hear me, E Class?” The Reaper said over yet another intercom. “The truth is, I’m very pleased you escaped. It’ll be the warm up before the unknown big game. I expect great things from you.”  

“It’s like… A game.” Hayami realised

It was. A highly sadistic, thought out game. Forget pleased, the Reaper had likely been counting on his escape. Like this, with just his voice appearing at unknown times, they couldn’t even see his face. That made him the most dangerous threat Nagisa had faced. Faces told the most stories, after all.  

“Let’s intercept him here.” Isogai said, taking the lead. “No matter which way he comes from we’ll have the upper hand if we outnumber him.”

It was sound logic. They’d already accounted for this, in their discussion earlier. If there ever was a chance to split up, half of them would search for Bitch Sensei. Those who had already volunteered wasted no time in speeding off, leaving the rest of them to try and keep the Reaper busy, to keep his all seeing eyes on him.

“Back us up, Ritsu.” Hara requested.

“Don’t feel like it.” Ritsu said from the screen. “Not like I’m gonna defy the Reaperman. I’d sooner turn off than do any work.”

“She’s been hacked!”

The sickening sound of footsteps drowned them out. Nagisa turned to look, but there was no sign of the Reaper, despite hearing the sound get closer. He had to really focus before he saw it, just the slightest hint of a shadow. Although he could just about sense that, Nagisa couldn’t make out the Reaper at all. This was the skill of a true assassin.

Yoshida and Muramatsu seemed to catch sight of the figure too, running towards him together for a quick attack. Although they both threw punches, they missed horrifically, unable to connect to his seemingly non-existent skin. Together on the ground, they slumped.

“The first skill I honed upon becoming an assassin was head on combat,” he said as he approached, smacking Kimura hard into the wall. “It’s ninety nine percent unnecessary for an assassin, but without it, the remaining one percent of targets would get away. If you’re looking to become the world’s best assassin… it’s an indispensable skill.” He approached Kayano, and kneed her hard in the chest, the sickening crunching sound echoing in the tunnel as she collapsed. “Females are so very fragile. Can’t be treating the rest of my hostages so carelessly.”

Nagisa’s eyes raked from Kayano’s form to the shadowy mass. Something powerful over took his body, right then. A voice inside him said that this was what he was meant to do. Though this was the most famed assassin of all time, Nagisa could rely on his second blade.

“Move aside, everyone. I’ll take him.”

“Nagisa kun…” Karma said, panic and warning lacing his tone.

He took a deep breath. The cracking sound must have been from their new clothes, the armour absorbing the shock. Nagisa was certain Kayano was mostly unharmed, only a little bruised at worst. But there was no way the Reaper knew that. It was like Nagisa just knew, he’d thought it was her ribs. He’d revelled in breaking them. What Nagisa was feeling, as he approached the assassin, wasn’t bloodlust, it was _anger_.

Before Nagisa could take another step, a deafening noise, the slamming of hands together, rung out right in front of his face. It was as if his nerves turned into solid stone, shock paralysing his entire body. His brain was awake, but he couldn’t move even the slightest inch.

“The clap stunner. Yours and Lovro’s might just startle a cat.” The Reaper taunted him. “But this skill has yet another level. Human consciousness has a wavelength: the higher the peaks, the more sensitive one is to stimulation. So when your foe’s consciousness is at its most sensitive peak, you strike with your most powerful sound wave. That impact won’t just temporarily spook your opponent. It’ll paralyse their nerves, immobilising them for a while.”

Nagisa felt his knees buckle. The Reaper sighed, kicking him hard in his midsection so that he fell hard onto his back the rest of the way.  “Omegas get me mad most of all.” He raised his voice. “So that’s it, eh? Now then, I seem to be short some people. Come along, don’t waste any more of my time.”

Once Nagisa regained sensation, he choked, breaths coming up short. He was certainly winded from the impact, but he didn’t feel particularly injured. It seemed, as he looked around, that the rest of them had been knocked out whilst Nagisa was in shock. Hopefully, nobody had witnessed more than just the clap. Nagisa didn’t want them to worry over him. He sat up properly, and instantly regretted it, stomach cramping up weirdly as he got the urge to vomit.

It took more strength than it usually would, but Nagisa managed to unsteadily pull himself to his feet, before being shepherded off with the rest of his classmates. They were dumped back in the cage, a collar placed around each of their necks.

“Try not to mess with them too much. These are individual bombs. Wouldn’t want you to prematurely explode!”

It took him mere minutes to round up the Bitch Sensei rescue squad, who received the same treatment. With them, Bitch Sensei, who looked completely unharmed, stood next to the Reaper.

“She was with him all along,” Itona said angrily. “She tricked us.”

Perhaps the betrayal would have felt worse, if the room wasn’t spinning. Another cramp, like a snapping band around his midsection, made Nagisa slide down against the wall. On top of whatever that was, he felt stupid, like a failure. He’d been so out of his league it was laughable, and now they were all in danger.

“Nagisa…” Kayano voiced her concern.

Nagisa waved her off, trying to focus on one solid thing.

“I don’t know how you’re going to try killing Korosensei,” Karma said, “but will it really all go according to plan?”

“No matter how poor my intel, I’ll still get results. That’s the world’s best assassin for you.” The Reaper said confidently. Before he could continue to boast over his victory, though, something seemed to come up on his phone.  

 “Karasuma?” Bitch Sensei questioned.

The Reaper considered it. “How did he know?”

“The octopus.” Itona answered for him. “Said if there was ever a wall his students couldn’t get over… Then it’d be his turn.”  

“Well, shucks. That sure throws a wrench in my plans.” It didn’t sound like it had, really.

“Korosensei and Karasuma Sensei!” Hara exclaimed.

“But Korosensei was still in Brazil!” Nakamura said.

The Reaper shrugged. “Oh well. Plan sixteen it is.”  

“My time to shine.” Bitch Sensei walked off with him.

Though everyone was discussing how excited they were to be rescued, and how they could always have faith on their teachers, Nagisa couldn’t find the enthusiasm. He was started to sweat, and shiver. Internally, he knew something was very wrong with him. Though there wasn’t a lot he could do about it, in a cage.

“Nagisa kun,” Karma got his attention, “are-“

“I’m fine,” Nagisa snapped.

Before he could be questioned any further, Korosensei crashed through the roof. Well, it seemed the Reaper’s plan had gone smoothly, if trapping their teacher was the goal. He was scarily good.

“Korosensei?!”

“Are you okay?!”

“Irina Sensei…” Korosensei said in disbelief, as the ceiling above them closed in. “Class… is everyone unhurt?”

Maehara groaned. “I can’t believe he captured you too.”

Korosensei placed one of his tentacles on the bars of the cage, and it immediately started steaming. “Bars made of anti-me material, eh? It’s tricky stuff, to be sure… but my body has finally overcome it!”

“Really?!” Okuda said with excitement.

“Now to reveal to you… my secret internal organ weapon!” Korosensei fell to the floor, and stuck out his tongue to start licking at the bars entrapping them.  “I made this tongue with a coating of digestive juices. Give me half a day and I can lick these bars away.”

“Say…” The Reaper’s voice cut in over the intercom. “Keep licking like that and I’ll detonate everyone’s neck bombs.” He, Bitch Sensei, and Karasuma entered the room together, standing on the other side of the bars. “Now, then – better hurry. I’m about to flood this place with water. This is a drainage canal. On my command from the control room up above, two hundred tons of water per second will squeeze you into noodles against these bars.”

“Wait! You intend to kill the students, too?” Karasuma said with alarm.

“Of course,” he said. “It’s too late to wait.”

Karasuma snapped his attention. “Irina! You knew as much, and yet…”  

“As a pro, I just prioritised results, that’s all.” Bitch Sensei looked down. “Isn’t that what you wanted?”  

“True, it may be a little harsh…” The Reaper trailed off. “Or should I let our best chance of saving the world slip away before our eyes?”  

Karasuma eyed him sternly. “Here’s how the government sees it.” Before the Reaper could even react, Karasuma smacked him hard. “The lives of twenty seven people are weightier than the earth. If you still plan on killing them too… I’ll stop you. And I’ll tell you this, Irina,” shrugs off jacket, “being a pro isn’t quite so carefree.”

The Reaper turned, and made a run for it.

 “I don’t think so!” Expertly, Karasuma too turned to begin his pursuit.

“Turn on your transceiver!” Korosensei called.

“Hmph. How rash. Karasuma may stand apart from others… but _he_ goes even further. Just look at how easily he trapped that octopus.” Bitch Sensei stopped in the middle of her sentence, receiving something over an ear piece. “Understood.”

Once Bitch Sensei left the room, there was nothing left to do but wait. Although there was plenty to discuss, the tension was far too thick for that. Instead, it was completely silent as they looked to Korosensei’s half of the transceiver, their lifeline. No sound came from it, until a little bit of static could be heard, followed by what sounded like an explosion.

“Karasuma sensei!” Korosensei called to him. “Are you alright?!”  

Karasuma’s voice came over it clearly. “What is it?”

“I finally got through. What was that explosion?”

“I’m alright,” he responded. “But Irina’s trapped under the debris. I don’t have time for that. I’m going after The Reaper.”  

“You cant!” Kurahashi took the device from Korosensei. “Why won’t you help her, Karasuma sensei?”

“Kurahashi…” Karasuma sighed. “Irina partnered with the Reaper to get results in her own way. A real pro accepts her own responsibility.”

Kurahashi’s voice was only full of determination, though. “What’s being a pro got to do with it? I know this is coming from a fifteen year old… but Bitch Sensei is only twenty one! Growing up in an environment with no peace of mind, she probably forgot to pick up some of the pieces along the way that would make her a grown up. So please… rescue her, Karasuma Sensei. Just like how you forgive us students when we make mistakes.”

Saying nothing else in response, Karasuma turned his end of the transceiver off. Despite her betrayal, Nagisa felt his stomach drop at the idea Bitch Sensei could be seriously harmed, although she was, well, a bitch.

“Hey,” Itona said, tugging on his own collar. “These collars are pretty simple. I bet they only have a detonate and unlock function built in.”

Terasaka looked over at him. “So?”

Isogai perked up. “We can take them off?”

“Yeah,” Itona said. “They’re not advanced enough to have recognition technology.”

“Over there,” Mimura pointed. “See the camera? It only points in this direction. If we stayed against this wall here, it would be like a blind spot.”

Sugaya stood up. “I bet if I use some of my paint spray, we could use the built in camouflage technology to disguise ourselves from his peeping eyes even more.”

The plan was executed swiftly, hopefully to confuse the Reaper of their whereabouts. Nagisa was thankful to be on the bottom of their little stealth plan. The idea of anything athletic seemed far, far out of reach. He wasn’t sure how long they were there, though as a team, focus was high, until it was cut off by a ginormous splashing sound.

 “What was that?” Kayano questioned.

Nakamura moved out of formation, as did the rest of them, to gather around Korosensei as his super vision eyes popped out. “Hey what’s going on?”

“The Reaper has a knife – no, a wire! He uses that on Karasuma and – no, he blocks it with his elbow! He’s using his knife as a shield, and seeing that, he switched to a kick.. but at the same time! What a great fight!”

“What the heck are you saying?!” Okano complained, his commentary confusing for all.

“Explain it so we understand!” Maehara demanded.

“Oh,” Korosensei said, “we planned for this, just in case. I can just about stick one tentacle through.” He demonstrated it, extending it to the far reaches of wherever Karasuma and the Reaper were engaging in this epic battle. Even Nagisa had it in him to gasp in alarm at the sound of a gunshot, but Korosensei seemed unfazed, pulling out a carton of tomato juice from who knows where and downing it.

All they could do was wait, until Karasuma eventually emerged, shirtless and unscathed. Bitch Sensei, despite her apparent injuries, looked mostly fine too. In his arms, Karasuma carried the body of the Reaper, completely immobile. For a moment, Nagisa wondered if he was dead for good, though that really wasn’t Karasuma’s style at all.

 “The man had marvellous skills, but put too much faith in them.” Karasuma reflected, once he’d let them all out of their cage.

“Whoever influenced him was a fool.” Korosensei said sombrely, looking over at his body. “He could have used his skills to follow a much straighter path.”  

“Sparing people or killing them… It’s all up to the person and the world around them.” Karasuma agreed.

“Yes, it is. Right, Irina Sensei?” Korosensei turned to her.

She tried to pick up and sprint off, but she had nearly been crushed mere minutes before. Even Bitch Sensei couldn’t heal that fast. Most of the class followed her, and she was quickly grabbed by Muramatsu and Yoshida.

“Hey bitch! What’s the big idea, running away?”

“Argh! Just do whatever you want!” She gave in. “The boys with their usual pent up animal lust, the girls with their usual envy of my beauty- just let it all out in an explosion of sexual violence!”

“Her ideas are getting wild.” Kimura said.

“Look,” Teraska addressed her, “just come to school like always. No more shirking your duties for days on end.”

“I’m dying to know more about that story- swindling Arabian royalty until you were on the brink of war!“ Yada smiled.

“If you don’t come back, I’ll just keep that French Boys Over Flowers manga you leant me!” Kataoka added.

Bitch Sensei pouted. “You know I was this close to killing you all.”  

“Is that a problem?” Takebayashi said. “Backstabbing, treachery, isn’t that what makes you a bitch?”

“And if we can’t even enjoy school with a bitch, what are we doing being junior high assassins, anyway?” Nakamura smiled

“That’s right.” Karasuma approached her, and pulled out a single red rose, no clues to how he’d come across it. “This flower wasn’t borrowed from one of our students. I came by it intentionally, by defeating the enemy. Is that good enough for your birthday?”

“Yes.” Bitch sensei blushed.

“Karasuma sensei, a word before things take a turn for the racy?” Korosensei asked.

Karasuma sighed. “It definitely won’t, but please.”

“I don’t want the students involved in this kind of danger again. I must insist on an environment where we can safely kill and be killed.”

“I know.”

Nakamura cleared her throat. “I can’t speak for everyone else, but… If we’re going to forgive Bitch Sensei for nearly getting us killed, as a class, it’s right that we forgive Nagisa kun too.”

That caught Nagisa off guard. It took a lot of effort to focus on her words, but Nagisa looked up, trying his best.

“Look,” Terasaka said, “maybe it’s not our business who you hang out with in your spare time. If we judged that, we’re no better than the A Class after all.”

“As long as you don’t become too much like them,” Sugino added.

“I w-won’t,” Nagisa said faintly.

Nakamura’s eyebrows furrowed in concern. “Nagisa kun? You look a little-“

Nagisa felt his insides lurch uncomfortably, and an internal dropping sensation he’d never experienced before. Without really thinking about it, he naturally let his hand fall to the source of the sensation, mostly located in his lower behind. It felt… damp. He brought his hand back, in front of his face as he struggled to focus on it. Though it was blurry, the colour of crimson coating his pale skin was unmistakable.

Once he realised that he was, in fact, bleeding, his knees crumpled. Faintly, as all the colours blurred together into darkness, Nagisa realised he hadn’t felt any of the usual jabs or rolls that plagued his stomach since the lift had been lowered. How odd. How peaceful?  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW - descriptions of potential miscarriage 
> 
> Essentially, the events of this chapter play out very similar to the actual episodes of the anime. Once they enter the bunker/trap, they escape and eventually encounter the Reaper. Nagisa gets blinded by his anger, and tries to take the assassin on. The Reaper uses the clap stunner on him, and kicks him back pretty hard. Nagisa assumes he's physically okay due to the armour capabilities of their PE Clothes, but quickly begins to feel nauseous and some weird cramping. He holds it together until the Reaper is incapacitated by Karasuma. Whilst everyone celebrates, Nagisa realises that he's bleeding pretty heavily from down there, and faintly realises he hasn't felt any movement either. He passes out, and that's where the chapter ends. 
> 
>  
> 
> Now that's out of the way, thank you for reading! This chapter originally didn't end on this cliffhanger, but it was getting seriously long, so you'll have to wait just a day or three! *dodges knives* I won't ask if you enjoyed this one, but hey, you can't say I'm not ramping up the drama. As always, all comments and feedback give me life and are much appreciated! I may even update again tomorrow :D


	20. Hospital Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Karma waits desperately for news as Nagisa's examined at the hospital

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING APPLIES FOR THIS CHAPTER ONCE AGAIN. IT'S NOT VERY EXPLICIT, BUT I WILL BE SUMMARISING WHAT HAPPENS IN THE END NOTES. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK. 
> 
> Now that's out of the way, I can't believe we're on chapter 20!

Throughout his life, Karma had spent a lot of time in hospital emergency rooms. Whether it had been a result of childhood misplaced curiosity (the worst instance of which had left him with a pretty cool scar on his left elbow), taking a one punch too many, or putting someone there himself, Karma was more than familiar with the process. How many times had he sat in this very chair, tapping his foot incessantly as he waited for news?

None of it compared.

There was only so much threat that came with a broken arm or nose. Those could heal. Karma had never seen so much blood before, not in that way, not just pooling out of somebody like that. What a reality, in which Karma could be bothered by the sight of blood. The way Nagisa had slipped back into it, like he was being swallowed whole…

Back when he and Nagisa had first met, it was so different. Nagisa was just another boy in his class, though admittedly it took a few days for him to realise the ‘boy’ part. Truth be told, he’d been mostly irrelevant, and would have escaped gaining any of Karma’s attention, if not for the way he noticed him staring sometimes. So Karma had given him the benefit of the doubt, and then they were friends.

Nagisa had been easy, and safe. Karma had never had a friend like him before, one he didn’t need to keep an arm’s length away at all time. It was… refreshing. But the deeper their bond became, the more Karma realised Nagisa wasn’t just the innocent boy he appeared as. There was something else, something terrifying, that made him see Nagisa as more of an opponent. The more he dwelled on it, the more he began to fantasise, of beating him until his bones snapped under his fists, drawing his blood and leaving him to choke on it. It was no question that Karma had to push him away back then, for his own good.

Karma’s stomach lurched. He thought he knew fear, had bonded with it, even. In his times of loneliness, fear was the only thing he could count on, a constant. He’d tamed it, mastered it, and inflicted it on others. But it had never felt like this. Karma had never been stranded before, not quite in this way. Nothing he could do would help. All he had was this chair to sit in, and waiting.

When the receptionist entered the room again, empty due to the late hour and the small size of the town, Karma practically flew out of it, ready to demand information.

She sighed, holding her clipboard in front of her midsection. “Akabane san, was it?”

Karma swallowed. “Is there… anything?”

A sympathetic smile crossed her expression. “The doctors are doing all they can, that’s all I can say.”

It wasn’t that he didn’t believe her, but Karma wanted nothing more than to punch to woman, hard. Of course he couldn’t risk that, he’d only end up getting thrown out by security. He shuddered, going back over to the designated seating. Deep down, he was only angry at himself, and he knew it. He’d take back his dumb promise to not act so overprotective in a heartbeat, if he could. If Nagisa wasn’t so damn desperate to play the hero, all the time…

“Akabane san?” A male voice, this time, caught his attention.

Karma tried to look just a little bit less hopeless, and clenched his fists in preparation for whatever news was about to come.

The man, a doctor, he presumed, chewed his lip. “We think Shiota san is experiencing a placental abruption.”

“What do you mean, you _think_?” Karma bit out.

He seemed unchallenged. “There’s no way of officially diagnosing it yet. Given that we know he experienced some sort of abdominal trauma, and the blood loss, we can only assume. Basically, it just means the placenta has detached slightly from the womb. Right now, we’re hoping we’ll be able to judge the extent of the damage via ultrasound. If it’s only minor separation, he’ll be just fine.”

None of that sounded good. “And what if it’s not minor?”

“Then,” the man tugged on his collar, “we may have to perform an emergency c-section. But that’s a whole other bridge to cross _if_ we come to it,” he said quickly. “Shiota san is in a much more stable condition now, anyway.”

There was nothing else Karma could think of to say or ask. Instead, he just nodded, slumping back down in the chair once more. At least Nagisa wasn’t knocking on death’s door, or anything. There was no relief, though. It was still so early… Truth be told, Karma wasn’t sure how early babies could survive, like that. Everything in his core shook from the uncertainty.

The scan photo was only a month old, and their baby still seemed so _tiny_ despite all its incessant kicking, unless it had grown significantly since. Karma knew, really, he had to trust the medical professionals in this, but all of that was so much more easily said than done. Not like he had a choice. The thought of 'what if' was too paralysing for his brain, he had to force it out. For a moment he closed his eyes, though there was no chance of rest, as if that would somehow make the time pass quicker.

It was the middle of the night, so once Nagisa had been safely ‘delivered’ to the hospital, everyone else had left after a few minutes. Karma couldn’t blame them for it really, it’s not like their presence would have done much. They had parents to get back to, and so and so. Karma’s parents were somewhere in Punjab, last time he checked, so that wasn’t much of an issue.

“Akabane Karma.” A feminine, yet stern voice said.

Karma peeled his eyes open, to set them upon Shiota Hiromi. He supposed it made sense that she’d found out about all of this somehow, probably through some legal obligation of the hospital. The last time he’d seen the woman, they were in the same exact position. Even though it had only been a few months since they last waited for updates on Nagisa’s wellbeing, it felt like a lifetime ago.

He’d thought he was scared, back then. Admittedly, he’d freaked out at the revelation. The idea of _Nagisa_ being pregnant was so abstract it seemed like one gigantic dream. Deep down, he’d known. Technically, he wasn’t sure. He knew that they’d done _something_ he couldn’t really remember at that party, but had been secretly hoping it went no further than an awkward make out session. Other than that, he supposed Nagisa could have been doing all kinds of things in his free time, but that didn’t really sound like him.  The next time Karma had seen Nagisa in the flesh, though, he was certain. A spike raced through him, and Karma had never felt so inherently protective over something before in his life.

Once the initial… shock had faded somewhat, Karma couldn’t help but think that maybe their baby would be cute or something. As long as they didn’t accidentally mess it up too much, at least. If they were lucky, he or she would turn out more like Nagisa. It wasn’t like Karma hated his own looks or personality or anything, but the truth was unavoidable. Though Nagisa made some _stupid_ choices from time to time, Karma couldn’t help but think of him as one of the best people he knew. If any child of his had even the smallest part of Nagisa’s heart in them, they’d be set for life.

Karma regarded Nagisa’s mother, finally. He didn’t say anything, no words really came to him. Instead, he just gestured for her to take his seat beside him. Her presence didn’t make him feel less alone, even though she did sit down, a seat away from him. Before the atmosphere got too awkward, Karma reached into his pocket.

“Strawberry kit kat?”

She glared at him, clutching her purse. “Do you know how much sugar’s in that?”

“Suit yourself,” he shrugged, and peeled back the wrapper. “They’re lucky, y’know.”

“Hmm.”

The sweet flavour danced across his tongue, but it didn’t make him feel any better. “The vending machine is about the most entertainment they have.”

“ _That’s_ what you’re thinking about?”

Now that Karma wasn’t alone to drown in his own thoughts, everything felt just that little bit clearer, less on the edge of insanity. He slumped back in the chair, exhaustion finally starting to set in, just a little. It had been a _very_ long day, after all.

“Hey now,” he tried to pull off casual, “I’ve been here, like, three hours longer than you.”

Her lips pressed tightly together.

Just like that, they were back to the silence. People came and went, with medical situations of differing urgencies. Apart from that occasional flurry of excitement, there was only the constant ticking of the clock, counting down each and every second. Even with the steady ticking, its meaning, and time itself seemed to fade way into nothingness.

Just as Karma fell to the edge of consciousness, the same doctor from before entered the waiting room, taking the sight in.

“Are you both here for Shiota Nagisa?”

Nagisa’s mother stood up. “Yes, I’m his mother.”

Karma felt a fresh shot of the bone chilling fear race through him.

The doctor kept his face neutral, though he bowed. “His and the baby’s conditions are stable. Fortunately, we managed to assess the damage wasn’t threatening, and the bleeding stopped on its own. We’ll have to keep him in for observation for a few days, but if all goes well he should be able to return home for the remainder of his pregnancy. That being said, he shouldn’t do anything strenuous from now on that may result in stress to his body.”

He’d never felt such a strong spill of relief flow through his entire body. The very force of it nearly knocked him backwards. Everything was going to be… okay. It was extremely dizzying, when every inch of him had been preparing for the worst. He almost wanted to laugh.

“There’s no danger to his life?” Shiota Hiromi asked.

The doctor shook his head. “His condition is improving rapidly. He’ll be just fine.”

“Can I see him?” The request spilled out of Karma’s lips, but he was glad he’d said it. Having seen Nagisa so limply on the floor, he _needed_ to see him healthy to truly believe it.

“I…” The doctor eyed him up and down. “Alright. Right this way.”

Karma immediately began to pace, before noticing the lack of secondary steps. He turned back, looking at Nagisa’s mother. “Aren’t you coming?”

She stiffened, and turned around to face the exit to the hospital. “I’ll be back to take him home tomorrow.”

Immediately, he knew. The woman was _lying_. Once he’d caught onto it, his brain _exploded_. Nagisa hadn’t mentioned anything about his mother at all, since everything had happened. Sure, he wasn’t really the type to complain about parents in many conversations, but it was odd, for it to not come up at all. And then there had been Nagisa’s apparent lack of clothes for a while there, and lunch food. Not to mention how desperate he seemed for Karma to _not_ walk him home, and how he’d gone into a strange building located in the opposite direction.

Before his mind could spiral any further, a door was slid open and closed behind him, leaving him to catch sight of Nagisa’s form. He was hooked up to an IV drip, and looked so pale Karma thought he could fade away into translucency at any second. Despite the knowledge he was going to be okay, Karma’s heart jumped up into his throat.

“K-karma?” Nagisa barely said, like moving his lips was genuine effort.

Instantly, Karma went down beside him, dropping to his knees next to the bed so their faces were more level. “Hey, Nagisa kun.”

Nagisa blinked slowly. “You stayed?”

“Yeah,” Karma found himself reaching for where Nagisa’s limp hand, a tube attached to the back of it, “I couldn’t miss all the fun.”

A tiny huff motion came from Nagisa, which Karma could only hope was an attempt of laugher. “T-they said that Akuma’s going to be okay.”

Huh? “Demon? What demon? Did you hit your head or something, too?”

“Oh,” Nagisa said, voice cracking. “I meant, uhm, I’ve kind of been calling the baby that a lot. I guess it... stuck, at some point.”

“Akuma, huh?” Karma’s eyes travelled to Nagisa’s stomach. “So mean, before they’re even born! Just that much of a troublemaker already.”

“Trust me,” Nagisa said, “it suits them.”

It was a little cute, maybe. Though Karma hoped Nagisa wasn’t set on actually calling the baby that once it arrived. A name like Akuma was pretty badass, but he didn’t want their child to be set up for bullying before they could even talk. He could live with it, for now at least.

“Nagisa kun…” Karma started, whilst his guard was still down. “Did your mum really throw you out from home?”

All but confirming his suspicion, Nagisa turned his head to the other side. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell anyone. I... I didn’t want you to worry.”

He was stupid. Undeniably, _unbelievably_ stupid. But as much as Karma wanted to knock some sense into him, it wasn’t the time. He didn’t have the energy left within him. As long as Nagisa was breathing, the rest could wait. Huh, something seemed to have changed within him recently, at least when it came to Nagisa. It was like he couldn’t even lay a finger on him.

“Try and get some rest,” Karma suggested, deciding not to deepen it.

“Okay.” His voice sounded so unbelievably fragile. “Uhm, Karma kun… No, don’t worry.”

Well, Karma couldn’t be _overly_ generous to let that slide too. “What is it?”

Nagisa turned his head back to face him again. “W-will you stay with me?” He asked weakly. “I’m sorry, it’s just your scent-“

He was most certainly still out of it, to make that request, but Karma was so exhausted he couldn’t deny him. The idea of letting Nagisa out of his sight again struck him wrong. Deciding to just let his instincts have what they wanted, he shrugged his jacket and shoes away, so that it was slightly more comfortable.

“What are you doing?” Nagisa questioned.

Karma managed to find his smile. “What, you were going to make me sleep on the floor?”

“I-I guess not.”

Throwing caution to the wind, Karma stretched out briefly before climbing onto the hospital bed, which didn’t have that much room to begin with, and folding himself around the curve of Nagisa’s back. It took a little bit of adjusting, but they fit together comfortably. Unable to ignore his protective urges, he rested his chin on Nagisa’s shoulder, and wound his arms around his body, practically covering him like a blanket with his own mass. As best he could, Karma attempted to release his most calming pheromones, which only ended up relaxing him too.

“Please stop putting yourself in danger from now on,” Karma let out lowly.

“I promise.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Summary: 
> 
> Karma waits for news, after the rest of the class had made sure Nagisa got to the hospital safe. A doctor eventually takes pity and tells him that the placenta might have come a bit loose from the abdominal trauma, which would have caused the bleeding. After a while Karma is joined by Hiromi Shiota, who he assumes was contacted by the hospital. The two wait in mostly silence until they're told that the damage wasn't too bad, and that Nagisa would be completely fine so long as he's careful for the rest of the pregnancy. Karma figures out on his own that Nagisa must have been thrown out from home, as his mother leaves once she knows he's okay. Karma is allowed to see him, and Nagisa weakly confirms it, and asks if Karma will stay with him. Karma agrees, and they fall asleep holding each other on the hospital bed. 
> 
>  
> 
> See, you didn't have to wait too long! And no need to mad at me, until next chapter... :D Once again, your comments and feedback really give me life and I've hugely appreciated the high amount I've been receiving lately!


	21. Future Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After his career counselling meeting, Nagisa is forced to think very seriously about his future

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Incoming angst warning :')

By the time Nagisa was finally discharged from hospital, he was more than glad for it. Though he understood that the whole rest and observation ordeal was important, that didn’t mean he wasn’t bored of having basically nothing to do all day. He’d forced Karma to go off to school the first morning, and there was only an hour of allocated visitation time after class was over. Still, that hour he’d spent with Kayano and Sugino was like a tiny piece of treasure, chatting and laughing about some of the day he’d missed.

When he actually stepped into the classroom again, it was almost as if none of the ordeal had actually happened. That was what it was like to be part of the assassination classroom. Always moving forward, and shrugging off anything that attempted to hold them back. Another day was that, another day.

Moving forwards, it seemed, was actually the issue. Nagisa blinked, staring at the piece of paper that had been handed out to everyone. Written on the blackboard: Career Counselling Day! Well, it wasn’t as if Nagisa’s paper was entirely blank. He’d filled in his name, at the very least. To be honest, with the magnitude of everything Nagisa hadn’t been able to think too far forward.

 “Is that octopus seriously doing career counselling?” Bitch Sensei walked in casually. Instead of her usual, more revealing attire, she’d completely covered up, now wearing a fluffy white jumper that looked like it was designed for comfort than sexual appeal.

“Bitch Sensei!” Yada stood up from her desk.

“In regular clothes!” Kurahashi added.  

She sighed. “Yes, regular old cheap clothes. Just trying to match your regular, old world. What? You want me to show more skin after all?”  

“No,” Okajima said, covering up his nosebleed, “hiding it has actually made you more sexy.”

“In a way you’ve grown,” Mimura said.

In the distraction, Nagisa only just noticed his own paper being shifted around on his desk. He looked down, to see that it had been filled in already for him. Fortunately (or unfortunately), Nagisa recognised the handwriting from the many other times she’d messed with him. He blinked, reading it over.

**Preferred high school: All Girls’ School**

**First career choice: Stay at home mother/Karma’s housewife**

**Second career choice: Maid**

 “Hey, Nakamura san!” Nagisa complained, looking to the desk at his right. “You wrote this! Why would you warp a person’s career path like that?!”

“Men’s work doesn’t suit you.” Nakamura shrugged.

“Yo, Nagisa kun!” Karma approached. “Want to take a graduation trip? I hear Thailand have some great omega resorts-“

Nagisa’s face heated up. “I don’t think that’s what those are for!”

“Huh? What’s this?” Before Nagisa could stop him, Karma had snatched the paper away from him. “I’m flattered, Nagisa kun, but we have to be married for that.” His eyes glinted. “Maybe we should go to Las Vegas instead and have a shotgun wedding!”

Nakamura leant forward in her chair, laughing. “As long as I get to be Nagisa kun’s bridesmaid.”

“Who’s getting married?” Kayano turned her attention to the conversation.

“Nobody!” Nagisa said loudly. “And we can’t go on a graduation trip, anyway.”

Karma didn’t appear fazed. “Such a spoilsport.”

He sighed. “Akuma’s going to be here before that.”

“Oh,” Karma said, crouching down, “that’s very true. Hey, Akuma chan, did you know you’re already ruining all my fun? You better make up for it sometime.” The door slid open as one of their classmates re-entered. “That’s my cue.”

Nagisa sighed as he watched Karma go. Of course he’d only been joking. There was no way he _actually_ wanted them to be married. The thought still embarrassed him, though. Quickly wanting to get that out of his head, he grabbed an eraser, rubbing Nakamura’s teasing off the page entirely. He still didn’t know what else to write, though.

Kayano coughed. “A-are you really calling the baby that?”

He flushed. “It just sounded better than saying ‘the baby’ all the time. Probably not when they’re actually here.”

“ _Akuma_ chan?” She smiled, and looked down at her own desk.

“It’s because they kick me a lot,” Nagisa admitted. “It used to be really annoying, but I don’t mind so much now.”

Kayano looked back over at him. “Does it hurt?”

Thinking about it, Nagisa wasn’t really sure _how_ to describe it. “Not really. At first it felt like little flutters, but now it’s definitely just-“ as if they knew they were being spoken about, Akuma gave him a pretty good whack just below his ribs “–kind of uncomfortable,” he winced.

It really was true that he didn’t mind so much anymore. After the blood, and not feeling any kind of movement, Nagisa welcomed it, almost hated when Akuma was being quiet. At least if they were kicking him he knew they were okay. Maybe that would change in time, but at least for now it was an internal comfort. His eyes turned back to the career sheet in front of him, which was much less comforting.

“Still stuck?” Karma asked, once he was done with his meeting.

Nagisa swallowed, knowing he only had a few more minutes to either make something up, or dig deep down into that dark something that bubbled under the surface of his skin. He wasn’t sure if he was ready to write _that_ down on paper, though. Maybe nothing was better. 

“Oh, Irina Sensei’s tag is still attached.” Kayano looked towards the front of the classroom, where their teacher was retelling some sort of story to Yada and Kurahashi.

Karma shrugged. “She’s not used to buying off the rack.”  

“Should we tell her?” Kayano asked, every showing

Nagisa screwed up his paper. There was no time like the present to dig into that part of himself, he supposed.

 “I’ll get it.” He stood up from his desk, and concentrated on the situation fully. In this case, his own hand was his blade. Nagisa kept his footsteps steady, and took a deep yet silent breath. Remembering what the Reaper had told him, he attempted to focus on Bitch Sensei’s wavelength. If manipulating it at its peak would make her collapse, Nagisa wanted to achieve the opposite. He approached with care, and waited for the moment her consciousness was at its lowest, and lined his own up.

He ripped the tag from her back, and she didn’t even flinch. It was too easy. Bitch Sensei was a professional assassin. Nagisa knew, with absolute certainty, that he could have killed her if he wanted to. Had they been in a regular crowd, and had he been carrying an actual blade, he could have stabbed her right in the neck, and slipped his weapon away again before anybody noticed.

“Last but not least!” Korosensei turned, as Nagisa entered the staff room. “So what’s your chosen career, Nagisa kun?”

“Sensei,” Nagisa begun, “I… I think I have a talent for killing people.”

It felt different, to really say it. Different from when Karasuma had volunteered him as the strongest student to fight Takaoka. Different from all the times he’d put himself forward. Saying it, admitting his _talent_ , sent shivers down Nagisa’s spine. Korosensei said nothing, so Nagisa decided it was better to continue.

“A-At any rate, I think I could get to where I do what the Reaper does. For someone with no real strengths, I couldn’t hope for a better talent for my future. Korosensei… should I… should I become an assassin? Please… tell me what path I should follow.”

Korosensei regarded him for a moment, without any change to his face. “Have you truly considered this path, Nagisa kun?”

“I don’t think there’s anything else,” Nagisa finally said it. He’d never said it aloud before, never even truly thought about it. “In everything but assassination, I’m average or less. B-besides, it’s not like there’s a lot of decent careers out there that don’t require a high school education.”

“Nagisa kun-“

He shuddered where he stood as his eyes begun to sting. “Somebody has to look after the baby. I-I think I could. It’s not like I know a lot, but I’d learn. And if I became an assassin, I wouldn’t be working regular hours, just every now and then, to get enough money. It’s my only choice.”

“Despite everything,” Korosensei begun, “I consider you a sensible student. But a career in assassination isn’t as basic as just showing up and lodging a knife in someone’s gut. It takes time, finesse, and a lot of sacrifice. Most who accept that lifestyle accept the risks that come with it. Risks to your own life, and those close to you… Generally, it’s a life without attachment, without _family_.”

Nagisa didn’t know what to say to that.

“Nagisa kun,” Korosensei continued, “there can be doubt that you have a gift for assassination. Whether facing a monster, a violent teacher, or a genius assassin, you have the courage to attack without fear. For a master killer, that’s an indispensable skill. But, Nagisa kun… this courage of yours is fraught with desperation. You’re taking your own safety and dignity too lightly: ‘it hardly matters what happens to someone like me’. The most important thing is that this is your choice, and if it’s your choice to keep and raise your child, your life is not just your own anymore. But even as your teacher, it would be wrong of me to allow you to blindly throw your potential away.”

“Korosensei,” Nagisa got out, unexpectedly through light tears, “I’m… I’m really scared.”

Now that it was out there, it was as if reality finally came crashing down on him. Smiling at scan photos and rubbing his growing stomach whenever he felt movement… it was all trivial. In only just over three months, there would actually be a real, living, breathing _child_ to take care of. Logically, he _knew_. Nagisa knew he was still going to be in middle school, with nowhere to live (he didn’t think Asano would take kindly to a crying baby), and no money. He didn’t even know what to _do_ with a baby. But after all that had happened, the idea of _losing_ them again made him feel just as sick.

“Of course,” Korosensei said, “many people go down the path of assassination out of fear, because they feel like they have no other choice when it comes to survival. But there is always a choice, Nagisa kun, and I think you should consider yours. To what end should you use your talents? And for whom? Re-examine these questions, and _all_ of the options available to you. Then we’ll talk again. And if you still want to be an assassin, and everything else, I’ll support you with everything I have.”

Nagisa returned to the classroom with a heavy heart. He knew what he had to do, though. Even as the lessons returned to normal after career counselling was done for the day, Nagisa felt almost impatient. It was as if now he’d forced this thing part the way off his chest, he wanted to rip it out completely.

When school was actually over, the ‘enthusiasm’ faded somewhat. Nagisa ended up procrastinating by doing his homework for the day (even the weirder, more time consuming tasks that didn’t need to be handed in for another week or so), and some extra studying after that until exhaustion became too much.

Finally, lying on his side in bed (his back was too uncomfortable), Nagisa built up his nerve and googled adoption agencies. It wasn’t like he hadn’t thought of it before, at first he’d mentally committed to this, but with everything else going on the idea of what would actually happen to the baby faded into the background. He swallowed, scrolling through several articles. Most of them seemed geared towards those looking to adopt, rather than actually giving the child away. He hadn’t considered how overwhelming it would be.

Nagisa couldn’t do this alone. With his hands shaking slightly, he opened up LINE.

He almost wanted to bury himself completely under the covers and draw the conversation to a close. But then his phone made its notification sound, and Nagisa knew he couldn’t He swallowed, reading over Karma’s reply as he typed himself.

Maybe it would be okay. Karma always had some sort of plan, or could at least come up with one on the spot when the situation demanded it. That is, if he cared enough. A part of Nagisa was terrified that he’d get bored of a baby. It didn’t seem likely, right then with all his enthusiasm, but Karma had definitely gotten bored of him once before, back when they were in their first year. He definitely couldn’t do it alone.

On the train ride the next day, Nagisa tried to mentally prepare what he was going to say. Every way he could think of even beginning his sentences sounded forced and almost foreign to his tongue. By the time he was knocking on Karma’s door, Nagisa was still clueless, and it most certainly showed on him.

“What’s wrong with you?” Karma asked, the moment he opened the door.

He didn’t realise it was _that_ obvious. “Nothing’s _wrong_.”

“You look like an overfed armadillo.”

“A what?”

Karma stepped aside. “Did you want to come in?”

“Mm.” Nagisa closed the door behind him, quickly slipping off his shoes. He considered that maybe deciding to do this here hadn’t been the best idea, after all. At least if they were in public, he’d have an easier escape route.

“So,” Karma said, sitting down on the sofa, “what do you want to talk about?”

Regarding him for a moment, Nagisa had to just spit it out. “Your opinion on adoption agencies.”

“Wha?”

Nagisa clenched his fist, as if it would give him support. “I thought that you’d want some say in this matter, so I haven’t even really looked yet.”

“You want to dump our child in some orphanage?!”

He jerked slightly. “N-not an orphanage.”

It was already too late. Nagisa could sense it, Karma’s agitation thick through the air. Even without delving into his unique talents, he was emitting the beginnings of unmistakable angry alpha scent. For other alphas, it would be either a signal to back down or to goad further, but for Nagisa it just seemed… sour.

Karma glared at him. “You know that’s where they’ll end up, right?”

“Not necessarily!” Nagisa attempted to defend. “I-it doesn’t have to be through the public system, I don’t think.”

“Even so!” Karma stood up. “I can’t believe you want to just give our child up to some random people you’ve never even met before.”

“I don’t _want_ to!”

“Fine,” he said, his tone cool as steel. “You asked for my opinion. I’m against it. Veto, or whatever.”

For some reason, that set a fire straight through Nagisa’s blood. This wasn’t the path he even wanted, but Karma had some nerve choosing against it _for_ him. It wasn’t just Nagisa’s decision, but he wasn’t okay to just accept Karma’s word as final. After a few moments of not saying anything, Nagisa realised he was _angry_.

“ _You’re_ not the one who has to live with it!” He burst out, finally spreading his emotions out.

Karma crossed his arms. “If that’s how you feel.” 

This had been a mistake. Everything had, but especially assuming that Karma would have anything helpful to add to this situation. “You’re acting like a child.”

His eyes widened, as if he hadn’t expected Nagisa to call him out. At this point, Nagisa couldn’t control himself, couldn’t be a meek and silent bystander. He was sick of letting Karma speak for him. With nothing else to add to this, Nagisa decided to just leave, before he said anything worse whilst he was in no mood to stop himself. At least, he tried to leave, before Karma blocked his path with his own body.

“You’re the child, storming out like that,” Karma said.

Nagisa attempted to step past him. “You already made your stance clear.”

“Because it’s wrong to just have a child and abandon it the minute you change your mind!” Though he didn’t raise his voice, it was sharp and full of menace. “What if they ended up in poverty or getting abused or something?”

“And how are _we_ going to look after it any better?” Nagisa said, really digging into the fear that was reality. “I don’t have any money to look after a baby, or anywhere to even live really right now.”

“I have here, and a large allowance-“

He felt as if he really could burn where he stood. “Until when? _Somebody_ has to take care of them, and neither of us can get a job without a high school diploma.” Digging up one of the darkest thoughts, those he’d kept buried since the day he even found out his secondary gender, Nagisa shuddered. What Nakamura had said the day before seemed to jab him like a knife. He wasn’t going to live a life where all he amounted to was being Karma’s housewife. “A-and just because I’m an omega doesn’t mean it should be me.”

Karma didn’t budge. “So that’s what this is about.”

“This is about trying to come up with some kind of rational plan to deal with this.”

There was that look in Karma’s eye that Nagisa recognised, the one he got whenever he was about to punch someone. “You’re so desperate to get rid of our baby. Always throwing yourself into stupid, life threatening situations and for what? To play the hero? It’s almost as if you were _trying_.”

It felt as if Nagisa’s lungs had seized up and dropped into the floor. He couldn’t believe that after everything, Karma would really say that kind of a thing. Nagisa’s internal organs twisted up, until he remembered one detail. This was Karma he was dealing with, Karma whose signature fighting style was finding the worst and most insulting thing to specifically hurt his opponent.

“You really think that?!” Nagisa asked, though it was through tears he couldn’t have stopped.

Karma’s chin tilted up. “If the shoe fits.”

He almost didn’t believe him. Sure, he was more than aware that Karma wasn’t the most balanced person, but this went beyond that. How badly must Karma think of him, to assume that Nagisa was purposely trying to hurt their baby. The air surrounding him was toxic, and Nagisa had to leave before he went even crazier.

“Get out of my way,” he said, and surprisingly, Karma let him go.

Nagisa didn’t even bother to stop for his shoes. Although they’d been easy enough to kick off, putting them back on again would have required him to bend down – which was quite the process given the size of his stomach currently. He decided he would rather just leave as soon as possible, though slightly regretted that once he was outside and walking on the uncomfortable ground.

He tried to disguise it as much as possible, but his pathetic sobbing sounds still drew people’s eyes to him. Of course people would glare at the pregnant, crying, shoeless, middle schooler with scorn, though. His stomach was so dome shaped it wasn’t as if he could pass for just ‘fat’ anymore. Still, Nagisa tried to rush past, to hold it mostly together.

It wasn’t one of the busiest times for the train, so Nagisa managed to find himself a seat at the very least. His eyes stung with the tears, but mostly at that point he was just dry heaving, praying nobody would pay him too much notice. It didn’t help that his scent blocker was probably wearing off (he hadn’t used that much), broadcasting his mood to everyone in the vicinity.

Opposite him, a woman who he’d place in her late twenties bounced a toddler gently on her knee. The kid didn’t seemed fussed, eagerly trying to look over her shoulder at the buildings rushing by. With her other hand, she rocked a pram back and forth. The woman didn’t seem too bothered at the demand for her attention, sighing softly to herself. A man of around the same age walked up the train, and said something softly to her. It probably wasn’t anything out of the ordinary, given the public location, but she still beamed up at him anyway, their hands connecting an appropriate amount on the pram handle. It seemed so peaceful.

Nagisa’s hand flitted down to his own stomach, and he begun to sob fully. He was more than aware he was creating an uncomfortable scene, but he couldn’t _stop_. The second the train pulled into the station, and the doors slid open, Nagisa practically ran off it. All the way back to Asano’s, he tried to hold it in just a little until he finally arrived, and closed the bedroom door behind him before collapsing onto the bed and letting everything out.

He lost all sense of time like that. All he knew was that the pillow was wet after a while, and he felt dizzy and disoriented. Though it had been a glancing thought a couple of times, Nagisa finally experienced the full, miserable reality that his life was basically over now and there was nothing he could do about it.

“Nagisa kun.” A sharp and loud pounding came at the door.

Nagisa ignored it, burying his head underneath the pillow.

He heard a sigh. “You’ve been crying for hours now. Can you at least keep it down?”

His stomach twisted, but he still didn’t reply, wanting to fall back into his own silence.

“You’re filling the place with distressed omega stench.” He paused. “You better be dressed.”

Nagisa didn’t really move when Asano opened the door. He didn’t have the energy to care that much about being seen in such a vulnerable state. Asano wasn’t putting out much of a threatening scent, anyway. In fact he barely even carried one anyway. Not really knowing what possessed him, Nagisa flashed up out of his lying position, and latched onto Asano like he was a buoyancy aid. He didn’t attempt to hug Nagisa back, but he didn’t force him off, either. They just… stayed like that, until Nagisa felt just a tiny bit more grounded.

“I-I’m sorry,” he finally said, pulling back.

It was Asano’s turn to not say anything. He’d moved to a seated position beside Nagisa on the bed, and just stared at him.

“I’m sorry f-for the kiss thing too,” Nagisa got out, whilst he was on a roll with the apology.

“You’re really strange, Nagisa kun,” Asano said after a moment.

Nagisa wiped his eyes with the back of his sleeve. “I’m a mess.”

“And that wasn’t obvious before?” He responded, but not venomously. “You wouldn’t be here otherwise.”

“My mum used to tell me that my life would be completely messed up if I didn’t follow the path she set out for me,” he nearly felt sick. “I-I didn’t believe her up until now.”

Asano cleared his throat and looked sideways. “Her life can’t be that stable if her first response is to throw you out.”

“It’s because everything I am is just one disappointment after another, i-in her eyes. You don’t need to try and understand.”  

“I _understand_ ,” he said, albeit quietly, almost through gritted teeth.

For the first time in a few hours, Nagisa shifted his thoughts from his own misery. Here he’d been complaining about his own life, when Asano plain and simply had much more to live up to. With a seemingly omnipotent father, Nagisa had seen for himself how far Asano had to go to live up to his expectations, how he’d isolated himself for days just to make sure he scored well on midterms. There was a kind of underlying fear within in, something Nagisa recognised. It seemed obvious to Nagisa, suddenly, that they probably had a lot in common. He focused on that, finding it a good distraction to his own life.

"M-maybe we could be friends," Nagisa suggested shyly, though the words sounded almost ridiculous coming from his lips, out of nowhere.

Asano blinked. "Friends? Why would you want to be friends with me?”

"You're not your father, just like how I'm not my mother. I-I know it sounds weird, but…” Nagisa looked at him properly. “You just refer to everyone as your _minions_. It sounds like such a lonely way to live, a-and I feel lonely right now.”

“What use are _friends_.”

Nagisa decided not to let him turn away from him. “Somebody to talk to, you know, about your day and your opinions and stuff. Someone you trust. Someone to comfort you, when you need it. And even if you don’t want any of that, somebody to just spend time with is still a friend.”

Once more, Asano was quiet for a second. “You’re not completely stupid, right? You do know that I manipulated you into humiliating your own friends?”

“It’s not the worth thing somebody’s done to me,” Nagisa admitted. “You had a reason, right?”

Something in his face softened. “Your favour or lack of it would have been an easy distraction, to pull the others down.”

“Oh,” Nagisa said, “that wouldn’t have worked.”

“Hmm?”

He decided he wasn’t going to feel bad about this. “You see, if you challenge Karma to anything, he tries extra hard at it. His worst enemy is complacency, if anything. He doesn’t care about me, anyway.”

Asano shifted forwards a little. “You really are very dense if you think that’s the truth.”

“It is,” Nagisa said, feeling his stomach twist up into a brand new knot. “I may as well just be his incubator.”

He sat closer still. “What if I proved you wrong?”

That sounded dangerous. “I-I don’t think you can.”

“Now that we’re _friends_ ,” Asano said like it was hard, “you should trust me. I have a plan.” There seemed to be a certain danger in his tone. “Akabane hurt you somehow, right?”

Nagisa almost automatically denied it, because he hadn’t laid a hand on him physically. Instead he said nothing, which seemed to be better than a lie. He still _felt_ hurt.

“Nothing too underhanded,” he continued. “Really, if he hurt you, he probably deserves it. What do you say, friend?” He stuck out a hand.

For some reason, maybe because the darkest parts of his soul had been drawn to the surface recently, Nagisa accepted the hand and shook it.

* * *

After the long day of lessons, Nagisa came out of the classroom, the same time as his other friends. Now that he and Karma were back to avoiding and ignoring each other at all costs, it had seemed to drag on. Nagisa was also nervous, somewhat, for what would happen. He’d never been a major player in a scheme before, as much faith as he did have in it. There weren’t that many ways it could go wrong.

He knew it was already in motion, given the way his classmates stopped in their tracks as they exited the class building.

“Asano kun?” Isogai, taking on his usual role as leader. “Why are you here?”

Like they’d discussed, Asano stood still and steady, unfazed by his questioning. “I’m just picking Nagisa up.”

Nagisa gathered his nerve, and emerged from the small crowd that was forming. “Ready to go, Gaku-chan?” The words sounded wrong, but he was happy with his delivery, smiling as he naturally would as he took a hold of Asano’s arm to mimic close familiarity.

“ _Why_?” Somebody asked, Nagisa lost whoever it was to the distance and the fact his heart was beating fast with nerve.

“He’s been staying with me recently,” Asano shrugged, “and Nagisa has doctor’s orders to take it easy. In walking him home, I’m just being a decent human really.” He leant into Nagisa’s body, and rested a hand on the small of his back as if to guide him.

Nagisa swallowed. “I’ll see you all tomorrow.”

His eyes remained level, straight on the target of the path back to Asano’s home as he begun to walk past the rest of his friends. Perhaps this would go entirely the wrong way, and they’d hate him for this, but honestly that was the least of Nagisa’s current worries. It felt like a necessary sacrifice.

“So?” Nagisa asked, once they were out of sight and earshot, the two of them springing apart from the intimate position they’d adopted.

Asano looked triumphant. “I was right. He looked like he wanted to murder me.”

The fire in Nagisa’s stomach burned just a little bit brighter. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this took me a little longer than I would have liked! I wish I had an excuse, but really it's because I ended up getting wasted and having a 24 hour hang over, which put me out two days. I'm... responsible. But hey, it's a pretty long way, so don't get too mad. 
> 
> Or... do get mad, because this chapter... :') I'm so sorry, I just like it when they fight. Hey, 14/15 year olds say and do the stupidest shit, okay? *dodges the incoming attack* 
> 
> I'd never tried multimedia on AO3 before, but I thought making actual screenshots would be more fun than just a few lines of dialogue! I might continue to do this for the rest of the fic, it depends on whether you guys like it or not :)
> 
> As always, I love and appreciate all comments and feedback! Until next time~


	22. Balance Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With the school festival rolling around, Karma and Nagisa are still raw from their argument.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this took so long! A combination of illness, being away for the weekend, and surprising chapter length are all to blame! I hope you like this one :3

Walking home in the darkness, Nagisa found himself shivering. Now that it was nearing the start of winter, the loose and light clothes weren’t doing much to shield him from the temperature. The only thing he had that qualified as warm clothes was the cardigan part of his school uniform, though that didn’t really stretch around his middle at all. Anything else he currently had available was covered in Karma’s scent, and Nagisa didn’t want to walk around with that wrapped around him.

It had been worth it, though. Nagisa was just making good on his promise to continue to tutor Sakura, the girl from the nursery, if she wanted him to. Though it was mostly academic, it practically made his heart sing to discover that she’d actually managed to make herself a friend. He’d made her admit that school wasn’t so bad after all, which had taken some time. Though he’d tried to say it wasn’t necessary, her parents had given him a small amount of money for it.

He wasn’t even out _that_ late, it was just getting dark pretty early due to the season turning to winter. There was still this kind of sense of loneliness, though. Sakura’s neighbourhood wasn’t anywhere near the main roads, so the walk was silent. Of course, Nagisa wasn’t ever truly alone anymore, the sudden roll in his stomach a sharp reminder of that.

Now that Akuma was growing so fast, Nagisa seemed to feel _everything_. He came to a stop, resting part of his weight against a lamppost. Placing his hand on his abdomen, Nagisa let his eyes fall closed, the movements not slowing down in the slightest. The cool air turned his breath to mist the longer he stood like that, chill running through his bones.

“Lazy _all day_ and then suddenly all energy at the worst moment,” Nagisa grumbled. “Just like…”

He sighed, and picked himself back up to just try and walk through it. It was constantly there, right in the back of his head, that Akuma wasn’t just his baby. Through every single unfortunate event, for better or worse, this child was half of him and half of Karma. Maybe they’d come out with hair that mimicked the shade of blood, or perfecting that roundhouse kick they’d been practising for the last few weeks inside of him. Nagisa wasn’t sure if he’d mind that or not, as long as the poor thing didn’t end up inheriting his own height.

Of course, Nagisa was never going to find that out. He wouldn’t see Akuma grow at all, so he could only hope they’d turn out to be a good (and tall) person. It wasn’t what he wanted, but it was all he had. He tried to remember that, tried to not smile at each and every one of Akuma’s gentler movements. No matter what Nagisa did, there would always be a hole in his heart, a mourning for something he could never have.

Nagisa had to come to a stop once more, his breath short after a particularly hard round of the kicks. He’d be surprised if he didn’t start to bruise up or something, after this. At least Nagisa was almost back, though there wasn’t much comfort to be had. Worse still, it was only going to get more uncomfortable, for the next three months.

He felt a little ridiculous doing it, but Nagisa slid the palm of his hand so it was flush against the skin of his stomach. “Can you calm down for just a few minutes, please?”

If anything, Akuma just kicked a lot harder.

“I know I’m not…” Nagisa paused, appropriate words such as ‘daddy’ feeling ridiculous on the tip of his tongue. “I know I’m not _Karma kun_ , but, you could try and listen to me a little too?”

Another seemingly targeted kick told him Akuma’s answer.

“Look,” Nagisa said, “I get that you miss him and all, but he said some really mean things to me! You and I, we’re better off without it.”

 _Finally_ , he could only detect the slightest of twitches coming from his stomach.

“So we’re in agreement, then.” Nagisa nodded, and straightened properly before setting off the rest of the way back. Thankfully, Akuma seemed to have mercy on him, and remained mostly still until he got in and out of the cold. As usual, he waited until he was all the way upstairs before announcing he was back.

Before he could enter the bedroom, Asano came out of his. “Welcome.”

Nagisa smiled. “It’s very close to proper winter out there now.”

“Yeah?” Asano raised an eyebrow. “Maybe it’ll snow.”

He stretched out his sore muscles whilst he still had the chance. “How did the festival preparations go?”

“Hmm, I secured Sakura Gakuin to perform for our second day.”

Nagisa jolted. “Y-you know-“

“I know a lot of people,” Asano cut him off. “Hm, speaking of the festival,” his eyes sharpened, “your café… thing. How’s that going?”

Before Nagisa had taken off to tutor Sakura for the evening, the rest of the E Class had spent the day preparing their stock for the festival. It was crazy, how much that mountain had felt like a hostile death trap at the start of term. Korosensei’s suggestion that it could give back for all their troubles had been widely well received, and after collecting everything for so long, Nagisa was almost looking forward to it.

“Good,” Nagisa replied honestly.

“You might want to keep an eye on your supplies,” he said, as if it was slipping from the tip of his tongue. “Just in case.”

He turned away, before Nagisa could question what he meant.

* * *

For the most part, their first day wasn’t unsuccessful. Though there hadn’t been a high volume of customers so far, those that they had served had all enjoyed their meals. Nagisa really did want to beat Asano and the rest of the A Class, but the most important thing was the quality. Even though they weren’t going to have many more customers, their hopes were still up and the food had to be prepared fresh. They had to keep up the standard, after all.

Nagisa was fetching some supplies from the classroom, which for all intents and purposes was more like extra storage with the festival going on. They were only light ingredients, so nobody had any complaints about it.

“Listen, Nagisa san,” Nakamura stood at the door, the only other person in the room, “about what I said the other day… I’m sorry.”

Nagisa blinked. “The other day?”

“Mmm,” she nodded, “the career choice forms. It must be tough, to go through life thinking you’re one thing, and then to turn out to be something else.” Her eyes fell to the floor. “I thought that times were different now, but it’s still hard out there for an omega, huh? You didn’t choose that… Did my teasing hurt you?”

Honestly, Nagisa was a little surprised to be receiving such an apology. He thought about it for a moment. Although her comments had triggered something off inside him, he wasn’t truly bothered by what _she_ had said. It was more the frightening possibility of them coming true, over anything else.

“Oh it’s nothing!” Nagisa smiled. “I can handle a little ribbing.”  

“Oh, okay. I’ll try to lay off the teasing, anyway.” Nakamura nodded. “Karma kun said I should.”

Nagisa jolted. “ _Karma kun_ put you up to this?”

“Not at all,” she said, lowering her head slightly. “I wondered if you were being so quiet this week for any reason, and he brought it up. I’m the one who wanted to apologise. He said it’s not fair that you’re the only one that has to suffer because of the, uh, baby. So I started teasing him too.”

Well, wasn’t that an attitude turn around?

“How is it, by the way?” Nakamura cut his thoughts short. “Since you left hospital.”

Nagisa sighed. “Just fine.” As the words left him, he gasped at the sudden jolt in his abdomen. He was beginning to wonder whether it was possible Akuma could truly understand him, because it was getting a little creepy. “Kicking right now,” he explained.

“Woah really? Can I?” She gestured. He didn’t have a problem with it, so he nodded, and Nakamura’s hands fell to his stomach. “Weird,” she said, after a few seconds.

“Oooooi! Nagisa chan! I came to hang out!” A sickeningly familiar voice sounded out, from outside.   

Nagisa stuck his head out of the window. “Y-y-yuji kun?!”

“Yuji?” Nakamura questioned. “Oh, from the southern island – that guy who mistakenly fell for you.”

“H-how did you know I go here?!” Nagisa looked him over, his appearance screaming ‘douche rich kid’ the same way it had before.

“I looked up the island’s guest records.” Yuji replied, like it was nothing for him. “When I checked the school website, I saw your festival was underway!”

“O-oh, I see…. Ah, ah,” Nagisa noticed what could almost be a swift gust of wind, and suddenly his legs were exposed. “Wait!” He hissed. “Nakamura san?!”

Nakamura, who was now wearing his trousers, looked at him with an evil glint. “One last time!”

“The words were barely even out of your mouth!” Nagisa looked down at his own form. He was now wearing her own skirt, though his jumper had been tugged down considerably. There was no way Nakamura’s skirt was going to zip up properly.

“He’s rich, isn’t he?” She whispered to him. “We’ve got to raise our per-customer average any way we can. Take this to hide that stomach of yours,” she stripped off her own jumper, and bunched it up for him to carry, before raising her voice. “Go get em, Nagisa chan! The fate of our class rests on your hostess skills!”

Albeit lightly, she pushed him out of the window so he stood in front of Yuji with nothing to hide. Though the get up was far less embarrassing than the outfit he’d been forced into in the hotel club, he was stood like this in broad daylight. The mask of darkness from the atmosphere was totally preferable to this.

“A-ah,” Nagisa started, “over this way, then?” He gestured an area completely obscured by the foliage, which hopefully meant that less people would see him dressed like that.

“Should I carry that for you?” Yuji gestured the jumper Nakamura had given him.

“Ah no,” Nagisa said quickly. “It’s just in case I get cold!” Trying to look like it wasn’t a major effort for him was near impossible, but Nagisa managed to sit down on the grass, across from the other way too happy teen.

“Man, I’m so glad I came during the festival!” Yuji said, once he’d been discreetly served some noodles. “And to have you wait on me, too! Plus? Your suggestion to eat in private where no one else can see us? You’re getting my hopes up!” 

That was the opposite of what Nagisa wanted! He blinked, unsure of how to get out of this situation. Completely unused to being approached by sleazy guys, Nagisa had no idea how was even the conventional way to act. Momentarily, something above the bushes caught his eye. A massive cue card?! Well, it was better than nothing. Nagisa cleared his throat.

 “I-I want you to eat all~ my favourites.” He acted, as if he truly meant it. The words left his lips easily enough, at least. He’d practiced the acting thing recently during Asano’s plot, anyway. Perhaps Nagisa really could do this.

“Sure, sure!” Yuji agreed enthusiastically. “Say the word and I’ll get the whole menu! Oh, I quit smoking those sketchy herbs. After all, you were worried about me!”

“Oh, huh!” That was, actually kind of good. Nagisa felt something swell in him, the small amount of glowing pride that came whenever he truly helped a person out.  

Kurahashi, who apparently had found their location, arrived with more food. “Here you are!”

“Ooh, this looks good too! Let me get a picture!” Yuji produced his phone, capturing the dish from multiple angles.

Before he could begin to eat it, there was a rustle in the bushes nearby. From them emerged the assassin Redeye, who they’d first met all the way back during their trip to Kyoto. Nagisa didn’t have a clue why he was there, unless he was following their class online and had seen the website or something. Under his arm, he carried a bird, and with his other arm he held a gun.

“Hey! Karasuma san! Brought you something!” Redeye announced.

Yuji gasped. “Who’s that? He has a gun! M-maybe we should call the police!”

Nagisa was going to have to think _really_ fast.

He practically leapt atop of Yuji to stop him from calling anyone. “Whoa! N-no, that guy is, uh…” Nagisa noticed another white cue card, and just decided to read from it. “Y-yoshioka san from the local hunt club.”

“Yoshioka san?!” Yuji looked at him suspiciously. “But he’s totally a foreigner!”

Another cue card shot over the bushes, and Nagisa accepted it. “H-he’s naturalised. A big anime fan, you know?”

“Oh, really? Well, enough about Yoshioka san…” Yuji gulped. “Nagisa chan, be honest; what do you think of-“ Before he could finish his sentence, he screamed.

Nagisa turned to look over his shoulder, and noticed Lovro crouching right there, looming over Nagisa’s form like a shadow. Nagisa himself wasn’t bothered, but to anybody who wasn’t a part of their class, something like that would seem incredibly creepy, for sure. 

“Lovro?” Karasuma greeted him.

Lovro nodded. “The octopus invited me.”

“I see. I’m glad you’re still alive, too. Your pupil’s been worried. Go see her.” Karasuma turned and motioned the way into the class building.

“I will.”

“W-what’s with the scary old dude?” Yuji set down his noodles. “He’s no ordinary guy…”

“M-mild Yagyu.” Nagisa read directly from his next cue. “A big name in the Asasuka theatre scene.”

“He’s a comedian?!”

“Th-that conversation?” He had decided to go down the improv route. “They were discussing a bit! His pupil quit comedy, see, and became a teacher here, and…” Before Nagisa finished, the scene before his eyes was a little unbelievable. All the assassins they’d met during their crazy third year appeared to be gathered around to eat, likely invited by Korosensei, knowing their teacher. “F-fellow comedians! From Asaasuka! And the guy eating the wasabi Mont Blanc is doing a reaction schtick he learned directly from Mild Yagyu! We just seem to fall in with that kind of crowd.”

“Hey, Nagisa chan…” Yuji looked at him seriously. “You’re lying, aren’t you? My dad’s a big name talent. Since I was little, I’ve seen the faces of tons of people who’ve cozied up to him. I can tell when people put up a front, wear a fake smile. The girl I met at that island hotel? _She_ wouldn’t smile like that.”

“Wow. Good eye.” It seemed Nagisa shouldn’t pursue a career in acting or misleading others, then.

Yuji shrugged. “Nothing good about it. Just an unwanted talent I got from my skeevy environment.”

There was no use in keeping up the charade, Nagisa supposed. Coming clean, at least about himself, would keep the focus off the assassins. “You’re right. I was lying to you.” He sighed. “I’ve looked like this since I was a little boy, I can’t help it. And I always hated it.”

“Wait. ‘Boy’?”

Nagisa decided to keep going. “But lately I’ve learnt that this side of me, it can be useful. So I don’t hate it that much now. I’m sorry. I’m a guy.”

“Another lie?”

“No, really.”

“A-another one?!”

“Really.”

Yuji blinked. “I-I thought for sure you were an omega.”

Nagisa flushed. “Well, t-that part’s not a lie.”

Considering it for a moment, Yuji smiled softly. “Then we still have hope!”

“A-actually…” Nagisa took a deep breath, and strained to pull himself to his feet. Once he was stood straight, he let go of Nakamura’s jumper, so his bump was no longer obscured. “I’m also pregnant.”

Yuji took a step back. “No way… B-but-”

“The baby was a lot smaller back when we first met,” Nagisa said, and then he thought of something. “Examined from another angle, your faults and weaknesses can be weapons. What I’ve learned, recently, is how to do just that. It’s how we put together this café, and it’s the connection that brought all these people here today. It’s really exciting – and fun.”

“Hmm.” Yuji turned, as if to leave.

Suddenly, guilt rushed over Nagisa. “Oh, b-but since I tricked you, I’ll give you your money back!”

Yuji just turned back to look at him over his shoulder. “Nah. I just… I just feel like such an idiot. I’m out.”

Nagisa’s heart dropped out of his chest. He felt _awful._ Truthfully, Nagisa realised he’d been much more worried about wearing female clothing than he had about tricking the guy into spending all his money. It seemed to be something Nagisa had become recently. The realisation of it all suddenly felt very… wrong. Nagisa had never considered himself a manipulative person, but he’d been doing it a lot recently.

Two wrongs didn’t make a right. Nagisa thought he knew that, thought he was above it. He had the capacity to _really_ hurt somebody. It was a reality that was new and strange for Nagisa. For so much of his life, he’d accepted that he was basically powerless to the situations surrounding him. Discovering his talents for assassination had turned the tables entirely. Nagisa was _strong_ now, he could stand firmly on his own. 

Once, before he’d come to 3E, Nagisa had been staring up at everyone else, yearning to share their stage. And now he was on that stage in his own right, he had this kind of power. He could tear others down from his vantage position, could cause them pain and hurt and force them beneath him. It wasn’t a power he _wanted_ to use, Nagisa realised. Remembering what Korosensei had asked him to think about during career counselling, Nagisa suddenly understood.

If Nagisa became an assassin, tearing bodies down into nothingness, just like now the power he felt would be empty. Nagisa wasn’t built to hurt others, not if he felt this bad about upsetting someone. It just wasn’t worth it. Perhaps there was another route he could do down with his talents, if he looked hard enough for one, a route where he used it for good.

There wasn’t much he could do about Yuji, though. Nagisa just decided to go back inside, his ‘hostess’ duty over. Considering Nakamura was nowhere he could see her, that’s where he assumed she went. They really needed to swap their clothes back, as soon as possible. There was no way Nagisa was going to be wearing a skirt for the rest of the day.

“Have you seen Nakamura san?” Nagisa asked, stepping into the room which most of the class was using to cook the food.

“Not around here,” Muramatsu said, stirring the pot of noodles.

“Maybe try down by the river,” Isogai added.

Nagisa was about to thank them, at the very least, before there was a sharp clench in his stomach. Like a force overtook his body, he seized, and likely would have fallen had he not planted his hands onto a desk and doubled over. It felt as if someone was taking a hold of everything in his abdomen and squeezing it in their fist, and the pain was intense. It wasn’t _stopping_. His brain went a little white, more focused on that than whatever was going on around him.

“Nagisa kun? Are you okay?!” Someone said.

He attempted to nod, but his teeth clenched as he bit out a whimper.

“H-he’s not going to have the baby is he?”

“No I think there has to be water for that.”

Maehara, who was closer, rushed over. “I’ll go put some towels down!”

Nagisa managed to gather to shake his head. He had no idea how long it lasted, but when the feeling finally began to subside, he was unbelievably _exhausted_. It took a while for him to actually come back to himself, blinking to focus on the crowd of his classmates who were crowded around him. At some point, he’d sat down on a chair, so he was looking up at them all. Once the remnants of the pain faded, Nagisa started to freak out.

“Nagisa kun? What’s wrong?”

Despite everything, Nagisa snapped up at the voice, comfort washing over him. _Karma_.

“It hurt,” he got out, the alpha’s presence giving him a kind of strength. “Like…” With no good words to describe it coming to him, Nagisa mimicked the motion of squeezing his hand into a fist.  

As if he was medically examining him, Karma bent down. “Does it still hurt?”

Nagisa shook his head, but leant into Karma’s space automatically.  

“Probably just false contractions,” he stood back up properly, _casually_.

“How do you _know that_?” Okajima said.

Karma shrugged. “Must’ve read it somewhere. It’ll be okay, as long as there’s not another one.”

That was… comforting. He’d heard about those, briefly. Nagisa took a deep breath, trying to pull himself together. Even if something _was_ going wrong, it wouldn’t be as quick as that, right? He was just being overly neurotic. The doctors wouldn’t have cleared him from the hospital if it wasn’t safe to do so. It was just a little bit of fear. Nagisa could cope with fear.

He steadied himself, and stood up. “I-I’m sorry for worrying everyone.”

“It’s nothing, Nagisa kun,” Isogai said.

“Can you walk?” Karma asked.

Nagisa tried it. Now he was coming out of his state of minor shock, it was clear no real damage had been done to his body. In fact, he was right back to his main discomfort being Akuma kicking up a storm inside him. Those little movements actually helped him reorient himself. He wondered if they were just excited to hear Karma’s voice again.

Though he didn’t actually say anything, there was a cold gleam in Karma’s eye. He exited the room, silent as though he’d never even been there to begin with, and Nagisa just got this _feeling_. Like Nagisa was compelled to follow. Without announcing his own departure, Nagisa did just that, tracing Karma’s footsteps towards the exit of the building.

“Oh, Nagisa san,” Nakamura bumped into him in the entrance. “Shame about that Yuji guy.”

Suddenly, Nagisa remembered why he’d even come into the building. “C-can we swap clothes back now?”

“Sure!” She smiled cheerfully, and before Nagisa even realised she’d done it, he was back in his normal, ill fitting trousers. It was significantly less breezy.

Though it was probably a little rude, he rushed past her. Karma was no longer in his line of sight, but luckily Nagisa had caught his general direction. He could easily turn around, but it was niggling at him. He felt such an intense need to go to him. So Nagisa walked, right past the remains of the festival and into the forest. Karma hadn’t gone far, and was casually perched on a rock in the first clearing Nagisa came to, tossing his knife between his hands.

“You know, Nagisa kun, I was impressed.” Karma said, without looking at Nagisa to acknowledge his presence. He tossed the knife, so it landed straight in the ground a metre in front of Nagisa’s feet. “Your stint with Asano? Little mouse like you, I couldn’t have expected something so dirty. I mean,” he jumped down from the rock to actually glare at Nagisa, “obviously you didn’t come up with it, but you looked like you were _enjoying_ it. And then I thought ‘ _wow, he’s really gone down hill._ ’ Acting like Asano’s personal lapdog? Come on now. I thought you had some standards.”

Nagisa shook, although he knew Karma well enough. He was only saying this because he knew it would get under Nagisa’s skin. “Why do you care who I hang out with?”

Karma’s chin tilted up. “I don’t _care_. Mix up with whoever you want, just don’t act like his bitch.”

“Why?” Two could play at that game. “Would you rather I be _yours_?” Nagisa didn’t believe it for a second, although Asano had been sure he’d proven his point before. If Karma had any kind of romantic interest in him, then at least it would make sense. But Nagisa had it all figured out, in his head. It was as if Karma wanted to possess him, just because he _could_.

Surprisingly, Karma didn’t have an answer for it, so Nagisa continued, rage burning through his small body. “It’s always been your choices. Your commands. And I know some decisions I shouldn’t make on my own, but I don’t need you making them _for_ me.”

Karma stepped forwards. “If you’d listened to me those times you wouldn’t have been hurt!”

“I didn’t have a choice!” Nagisa yelled. “The reason my mum threw me out in the first place was because I wouldn’t get an abortion!” He took a deep breath. “So. Listen to me now, Karma kun, I could never intentionally hurt our baby.”

“Abandoning them.” Karma bit out.

“Do you have a _better_ plan?”

“People shouldn’t have kids if they’re just going to leave them.” Karma looked at the mulch beneath his feet. “Things like that can screw a kid up for good.”

Though he couldn’t be totally sure what Karma was talking about, Nagisa could make a good guess. Was that why Karma felt so passionately? Sure, Nagisa knew that Karma’s own parents weren’t around that much, but Karma usually seemed indifferent to it. Just a tiny bit, Nagisa softened. “You think I seriously want that? We don’t have any viable options.”

“I could get a job.”

“With _school_?”

“Isogai kun manages.”

“And what about everything else?” Nagisa felt the irritation rise again.

Fully in his personal space, Karma met Nagisa’s eyes once again. “A thirty billion yen bounty divided by twenty eight. Between the two of us, we have enough to do _anything_.”

That was… a good point. Nagisa hadn’t ever wanted to rely on money, but they would have a lot of it when they killed Korosensei. By all logic, that would solve most of the practical issues that came with having a child. But it wasn’t only about practical.

“We’d be stuck together for twenty years at minimum.”

Karma stiffened. “So that’s what’s so bad, huh?” He stepped around Nagisa, and began to walk away, like that was the end of their argument.

Nagisa suddenly felt unsteady, with everything that had happened in the last fifteen minutes. He wasn’t prepared for that to be _it_. “Karma kun! Wait.”

Karma stopped in his tracks.

Taking a deep breath, Nagisa dug into his raw feelings. “I was born into a world where all my parents did was fight. W-what if they weren’t fake contractions? Akuma deserves more than that.”

“Nagi-“ Karma turned back around.

“More than what _either of_ us can possibly give them, Karma kun! I don’t want to give them away, b-but- We might not be the best thing. I haven’t made a decision yet, but I think this is the best one. I hope you’ll come to think so, too. At the very least, right now, we need to stop fighting.”

For a moment, Nagisa was sure Karma was about to walk away again, but instead his shoulders slumped. “Fine. If that’s what you really think, then I’ll hear you out. I’ll look at agencies and the rest of it with you. But. If an equal decision is what you want, then my opinion counts too. I’m looking you straight in the eye, aren’t I?”

Despite himself, and his brain likely being clouded, Nagisa felt a kind of stability wash over him. Karma wasn’t looking down at him, regarding Nagisa as his equal. This… fight was meaningless. If Karma was prepared to listen, finally, then Nagisa would be too. The rest of it, for the sake of everything, Nagisa could let slide for now.

“Okay, Karma kun. We’ll consider it. But at the end of it, what’s the best for Akuma is what’s really important.”

“I’ll agree to that.” Karma nodded.

Nothing was fixed, but at least they’d wrapped a bandage around it. It was a start. Nagisa nodded back at him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *sigh* Well, it's an improvement from last time, right? 
> 
> As always, I love comments, feedback, and kudos!


	23. Finals Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nearing the end of their second term, it all comes down to the final exams.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The fluff is strong in this one wow

"W-what do you _mean_ , underweight?”

Doctor Shirogane smiled at him sympathetically. “It’s not extreme enough that I’m concerned, from a medical standpoint. But yes, your weight gain is slightly under the typical amount for this stage of pregnancy.”

Nagisa looked down at his frankly huge stomach. “B-but-“

“You sound like a middle aged woman,” Karma commented, from his designated chair.

His eyes narrowed. “ _You’re_ not the one who has to carry this around with you all day.”

“Alright,” Doctor Shirogane finished writing something on her small clipboard. “Would you like to return to the chair?”

Defeated, Nagisa just nodded and followed her instruction. He didn’t get how his stomach was smaller than it was supposed to be. Although there was still over two months left, he felt gigantic, and it seemed impossible that his stomach could grow any larger. Though, he supposed he’d rather that than Akuma be born too small. At least his suffering was nearly over.

As always, he flinched at the cold gel she spread over his abdomen, though he was somewhat more prepared for the sensation. It was quickly warmed up again by the pressure of the ultrasound wand, and then the sonogram appeared on her screen. He’d seen it a few times now, but Nagisa’s heart still soared. It was so _clear_.  

Doctor Shirogane hummed, and zoomed in on a few parts. “It doesn’t look like the placenta has separated any further,” she announced finally, “though you should definitely continue to take it easy. The baby has to double its weight from here on out.” That sounded… _stressful_. “Aside from being a little on the small side, all the developments are perfectly fine,” she pointed to the screen, “see the head, and arms, and…” she stopped. “Do you both want to know the gender? I can see it today.”

Nagisa almost lurched up. “You can really tell?”

“I’m confident, yes.”

He looked over at Karma. “Do you want to know?”

Karma had been uncharacteristically quiet. If anything, Nagisa had half expected him to jump for joy and demand the information instantly. It was odd of him, to be so subdued about anything that involved the child. He shrugged, matching Nagisa’s stare.

“Do _you_?”

Frankly, Nagisa wasn’t sure. He’d never actually truly thought about it, picturing Akuma as a generic baby rather than a real, tiny human. For a second, Nagisa thought that he might say yes, if not only for excitement but also the convenience that pronouns would create. He realised, sharply, that perhaps it would be a bad idea after all. The more he could picture, the harder it would be to eventually let go.

Doctor Shirogane seemed to read his mind. “It’s perfectly normal to wait. In fact, I’d say more of my patients would rather be surprised.”

“C-can we wait?”

Karma shrugged. “If Nagisa kun doesn’t want to know, then I don’t mind.”

She smiled, cutting the slight tension. “I’ll just keep it to myself for a few more weeks, then. How have you been feeling, otherwise?”

Nagisa chewed his lip. “Last week I got this sudden squeezing pain in my stomach, b-but it went away after a minute.”

“Mmm,” she said, “did your stomach harden at all?”

“I-I don’t remember,” Nagisa responded honestly.

“It certainly _sounds_ like it could Braxton Hicks, but generally that shouldn’t be too painful.” Doctor Shirgane smiled. “It’s your body’s way of practising for the main event. You only really need to worry about them if you have four within an hour, which could be a sign of preterm labour instead. Okay! You’re free to pull your shirt back down.”

That was an ominous thought. Nagisa could only really hope Akuma wasn’t planning on going anywhere any time soon. If they were already small for their age… Nagisa didn’t want to think about it. The appointment was basically over after that, but it continued to play on his mind for the next half hour or so. Was Akuma really _that_ small? Internally, it didn’t really feel like it.

The smack sound of Karma putting a tray of food down in front of him snapped him out of it.

“A happy meal?” When Karma had offered to buy him food, Nagisa’s morals regarding letting anybody buy him anything had disappeared. He was permanently hungry. Besides, they were at a fast food joint, so it wasn’t exactly fancy or expensive.

Karma took a bite from one of his fries. “And the rest of this.”

With slight dismay, Nagisa looked at the pile of food in front of him. “I can’t eat this.”

He shrugged. “Doctor’s orders, Nagisa kun. Here, a large meal for you, a happy meal for Akuma chan.”

So Karma was trying to _fatten him up_ , now? Unfortunately, with the grumble of his stomach, Nagisa’s will power didn’t hold out for much longer. The second he bit into one of the chicken nuggets, his mind went blank, and before he knew it most of the food was gone. Slightly ashamed at how crazy he must have looked, Nagisa swallowed, leaning forward to sip his drink from the straw.

“Did you look at the files I sent?”

Karma slouched back. “They’re all serial killers.”

 _Of course_. “They can’t all be serial killers.”

“Sure they are,” he took a bite of his remaining food. “Nobody smiles like that naturally.”

Nagisa shifted. “You know they have to do background checks.”

“That doesn’t mean they’re _good_ background checks.”

“Did you even really look?”

Taking another bite, Karma nodded. “The Watanabe family’s business will crash in a few years, easy. The Abe family live right next to a radioactive plant. Aoki is just a terrible family name. I’m pretty sure I saw the Miyamotos’ oldest kid in a police report last week. And,” he paused and pulled out his phone, “that Fujiwara man is definitely a serial killer. Look at his _eyes_.”

Nagisa squinted, looking closer at the image the couple had submitted to the adoption agency. Sure enough, when you zoomed in, there appeared to be a certain amount of menace in the man’s expression. For a moment, Nagisa was tempted to excuse the image as just an unfortunate one, but then he noticed what looked like whips in the background. He almost dropped Karma’s phone, sliding it across the table in shame.

“You done?”

Nagisa nodded, slightly aware that Karma probably meant a little more than ‘are you done with the food’. Any conversation about adoption agencies faded out, as they left the restaurant and began the walk back to the train station. As they engaged in lighter, non-baby related conversation, Nagisa felt a tug on his heart strings. Before he could stop himself, he imagined a faceless child skipping along in front of them. Nagisa and Karma would be happily chatting to each other, though both keeping a sturdy eye on their son or daughter. Then Karma would say something funny, and Nagisa would laugh and squeeze the hand he was holding tighter, and…

Freezing up for a moment, Nagisa nearly choked. It was just his weird, hormonal, dumb, omega pregnancy brain playing up again. Perhaps it was a little mean, but Nagisa was thankful when he and Karma went their separate ways. At the very least, it saved him from further potential to embarrass himself. The longer he stood standing, the more uncomfortable he became, so he didn’t stall in returning to the Asano residence.

Though the usual kind of silence greeted him at first, upon entering, Nagisa wasn’t expecting to see Asano slumped by his bedroom door. It was hard to tell, through looking at his form, that he was looking at a fourteen year old boy rather than a withered shell of a person. Nagisa had grown accustomed to the steel and domineering nature of Asano’s gaze, but immediately, the difference was obvious. His eyes were hollow, empty, as if he’d set them upon a ghost.

Nagisa swallowed, unsure of how to approach this. “Asano kun-“

“Can you… not call me that?”

“Uhm…” Nagisa felt awkward, “are you okay, _Gakushuu kun_?”

The silence that followed was so awkward you could practically hear crickets chirping.

“On second thought-“

“-why change this late in the game?”

They both nodded in agreement.

“I-I can’t join you on the floor,” Nagisa said, gesturing his stomach. Even if he made it down there, standing back up again afterwards would be… a process, to say the least.

Slowly, Asano nodded, as if he was coming back to his senses. “Thanks.” Swiftly, he shifted his weight so he could kick back up onto his feet again eloquently, as if he’d never been slumped in the first place.

“Wait!” Nagisa said, experiencing a kind of whiplash with Asano seemingly back to normal. “D-don’t you want to talk about it, or something?”

Asano stepped past him. “You’ve said all you needed to. Go study, Nagisa kun.”

* * *

With finals in a week, things really were getting serious. Asano had spent every waking moment holed up in his room, just as he had during midterms, and frankly Nagisa was a little worried for him. After Sugino’s intel that the Headmaster had taken over the A Class’ lessons, he presumed it had to be something to do with his father after all.

What Nagisa hadn’t expected, however, was for Asano to be waiting for them on the border of the main campus at the end of the day. But there he was, leaning casually against the grey wall, as if he wasn’t clearly anticipating their arrival. When he caught sight of them, he stood up properly, and it suddenly felt like they were marching into battle against a great enemy.

“Huh? It’s Asano kun.” Kayano said

Maehara folded his arms. “What do _you_ want?”

“You’re not the kind of guy who’d run recon on us,” Sugino said, before looking over at Nagisa. “Unless…”

Asano cleared his throat. “It pains me to say this… but I have a request.” Silence. “I’ll cut to the chase. That monster… I want you to kill him. Not physically, of course. Kill his educational policies.”  

“His educational policies?” Yada questioned. “Like… how?”  

“Easy. I want you, the E Class, to dominate the top spots in the next end of term exams. I’ll be in first, of course, but excellent grades mean nothing when coming from an excellent student. For detritus like you to show up the A Class, though… _That’s_ how we ruin his stance on education.” Asano said confidently, like he’d thought this completely through.

Kataoka took a step forwards. “Asano kun, I’ve heard about the chilly relationship between you two. Are you saying… you want us to deny your father’s methods and turn away from him?”

“Don’t misunderstand. ‘Be strong enough to kick even your father down’. Or so I’ve been taught… and now it’s time to put it into practice. I don’t know about anybody else, but that’s our relationship. But that’s not the case for the other, lesser students. Right now, A Class is hell. With their hatred for the E Class their only support, he’s making them study beyond their limits! If they win like that… it’ll be the only method they trust from now on. You can only gain so much strength in hating, scorning, misleading your foes. Even opponents like you will still give them trouble. They’ll still be my flunkies in high school. But if my flunkies’ strength is lopsided, I can’t rule the ruler. Sometimes defeat can... open some eyes. So please: show my friends and father a proper defeat.”

Once Asano was done with the delivery of his speech, he bowed to them. Although recently he was never actually unpleasant to Nagisa, _bowing_ to them was a whole other ball game. Nagisa could tell, though he wasn’t even trying to mask his arrogance, he was being totally serious in his intentions.

“Huh? Is this any time to be worried about someone else?” Karma crept up beside him. “You’re not taking first place, _I_ am. I told you: next time the E Class won’t go easy on you. I’ll be number one, with the rest of the E Class right under me. I’d say tenth place would look good on you, Asano kun.”

“Ooh Karma said it! He’s taking first place.” Muramatsu commentated, noticing the way Asano glared at him.

“Just don’t let it turn out like it did last time.” Takebayashi muttered.

Terasaka moved behind Karma, and grabbed a hold of his shoulders. “At least try to do better than me, huh?” Before he’d even got the words fully out, Karma flipped their positions, kicking him repeatedly in the ribs.  

“Asano,” Isogai stepped forwards, removing the focus from the fight. “We’ve been trying to do our best to win all along, and we’ll do it this time too. That’s how it’s always been for us and the A Class. We’re happy if we win, frustrated if we lose. No need for ranks beyond that. Isn’t that enough? We’ll do our best so you can all be glad you had the chance to take us on.”

“Don’t think too much,“ Karma said, mimicking slitting his own throat. “Just come at us like you want to kill us. That’s what makes it fun.”

“How amusing. Then I’ll fight with my gloves off, too.”

Asano’s confidence felt much more like his true personality, than what Nagisa had experienced the other day. It was a happy thought, to say the least. They’d made an agreement, an understanding between the two of them, and Nagisa definitely had it in him to worry now. With nothing left to say apparently, Asano turned around to leave them there, his proposition like wisps in the air.

“You don’t have to go with him,” Karma said, picking up on the way Nagisa’s weight instinctually shifted.

Nagisa tried his best to look calm. “It’s okay. He’s my _friend_ , Karma kun.”

Though, Nagisa couldn’t actually catch up. Asano was walking at a fast pace, and whilst Nagisa would have been able to match it regularly, his pregnancy weakened body didn’t stand a chance. Naturally, Asano must _know_ this, which made it clear he didn’t want to continue the conversation. Regardless, Nagisa was able to walk fast enough to keep him in his line of sight.

For the remainder of the week, they studied like mad. Though there was no major wager, the stakes were massive. As their finals, these were the exams that really counted. Despite having scored scarily high (for his standards) in mid-terms, Nagisa was genuinely nervous. Regular day to day facts were a struggle to remember with the state his head was in, let alone the barrage of knowledge he’d be needing to get anywhere near the top fifty. Really, the week blew fast quickly, and the next thing Nagisa knew, he was on his way to his English exam.

As they walked down the hallway, it was clear that Asano hadn’t been kidding about the state the A Class were in. Like they could sense their presence, they rushed to the door window, chanting ‘kill the E Class’ like mindless zombies.

 “Hell of a look in their eyes.” Yoshida said, as they tried their best to ignore it.

Nakamura shrugged, apparently unaffected. “The A Class is probably psyching themselves up. Can you beat them, Karma?”  

“Who knows?” Karma tilted his head, but Nagisa sensed he wasn’t being serious about his uncertainty. “If any of them really do plan to kill me, that _might_ slow me down.”  

It was clear, once they were settled in their seats and the exam had actually begun, that these exams were on a completely different level to any of the others. Within the first few minutes, Nagisa found him tripping up on the complicated English vocabulary, despite it being his best subject. To make matters worse, a sickening tightening begun to form in his stomach midway through the listening exam.

It was the _worst_ possible timing. Nagisa forced himself to close his eyes and bite hard on his lip to prevent himself from letting out any sounds of pain. Breathing through his nose slowly, the sensation wasn’t the worst he’d ever experienced, even if it was causing him to sweat and lose focus. Thankfully he was far more aware than he had been the first day of the festival, and he noticed his muscles loosen after a minute or so. Proud of himself for getting through it, Nagisa guessed the answer.

After English, the exams only got harder and harder. There was absolutely no way he could aim for full marks on any of them, so he opted to write as fast as he could, and put wild answers down rather than leaving any blank spaces. Partial credit, after all, was better than no credit at all. It came to its height in maths. There was no way anybody _human_ could actually answer all of these questions. The last question alone… Nagisa blindly wrote a few formulas out that could potentially be relate to it, but there was no way anybody would get it. Anybody except… maybe Asano and Karma.

Finally, he slumped back in the chair, as comfortably as he physically could. It was over. The mood around the room was pure exhaustion. However, there wasn’t an air of defeat. Papers quite literally out of their hands, it would only be a waiting game, to see if they’d overcome the A Class once and for all.

“That last question, huh?” Maehara joked, a row ahead. “That was insane.”

Karma had already stood up, making his way to the front. “What are you talking about? It was practically _elementary school_ maths.”

Maehara’s face fell into a contortion, though it didn’t mean much coming from Karma, who by all standards was insane when it came to intelligence. Nagisa was sure it wasn’t false confidence, that Karma genuinely did mean he’d found it easy. There was no way of knowing, yet.

The wait for their results was torture. It felt like the entire school was on edge, twirling their thumbs until doom was revealed. And then the day came, and Nagisa felt a tiny bit sick. Not only was their reputation, all they’d been working for this year, on the line, but also their future. If somebody didn’t make top fifty, per Kunugigaoka Junior High rules, they wouldn’t be allowed to graduate from compulsory education at all.

“Now then, class, I’ll be returning your compiled exam papers,” Korosensei finally announced. “Did your second blades manage to reach their targets? No grumbling about a point here or there, now. Were your scores this time good enough to get you into the top fifty overall? The main campus will be posting the overall ranks right about now, so let’s start with the ranks here in the E Class, too.”

Before Nagisa even paid attention to the individual marks, Korosensei rolled out the scroll of the overall marks. Like everybody else, he rushed over to it, scanning for his own name. _Fourteenth_. In those exams from hell, he’d come _fourteenth_. Although it was technically a drop from last time, given the circumstances, Nagisa had never been prouder of any academic achievement ever.

“I-I-I’m forty sixth?!” Terasaka said, bewildered.

Wasn’t Terasaka constantly dead last in E Class? That meant…

“We did it!”

The mood of celebration washed over at them like a tsunami wave. Undeniably, they had proven the system wrong. Nagisa felt practically _dizzy_ from it. Blinking again, he read the results properly, and noticed what was at the top. Not only had Karma scored first overall, he’d done it with _full marks_. He couldn’t place the sensation that rushed through his whole body, other than pride and joy.  

“Karma kun!” Nagisa turned to him, smiling brightly. Whatever was crashing through his body was too powerful, and burst out. He couldn’t help but practically fling himself at Karma, into a kind of half hug, half grab.

Korosensei also beamed. “How does it feel, Karma kun, to go after that first place rank on such a high level battleground… and win?”

“Uh, whatever, I guess.” Though Karma attempted to sound casual, a deep tint flushed onto his cheeks. He turned and looked back at Nagisa, and squeezed his shoulder back. When their eyes and smiles locked, the flutters grew, and Nagisa was _floating_.

The flutters became real flutters, with all the commotion going on. Nagisa looked down at his own bump, happiness not in danger. “Even Akuma’s proud of you.”

Once Nagisa had nodded his consent, Karma’s hand slipped against his stomach. Once he could feel the strong kicks (perhaps Akuma was trying to dance in celebration), Karma’s smile and complexion grew stronger. Naturally, their bodies leaned into each other, as if they were floating together in a bubble.

“It seems your battle against the perfection boasting Asano kun came down to that final math problem.” Korosensei confirmed, knocking them out of the moment slightly.

“About that…” Karma didn’t move his hand from Nagisa’s abdomen, but turned to face their teacher. “I’m not sure exactly why, but I don’t think I could’ve solved it if I didn’t spend this year with you all. That’s the kind of problem it was.”

Taking a deep breath to attempt to collect himself, Nagisa noticed Karma had turned back to him. He didn’t even really think about it, sliding his own hand on top of Karma’s. Through the gaps left by his fingers, Nagisa could feel Akuma’s kicks for himself, that and how _warm_ the back of Karma’s hand was.

And then came the dread. Nagisa wasn’t supposed to be this comfortable with Karma, was he? Though it had been his own suggestion they try to stop fighting, to forget about it for the sake of their baby, he hadn’t intended to just forgive Karma for what he’d said as if it never happened. Yet… Nagisa couldn’t muster the anger he should be feeling. Frankly, he really didn’t know what this grip that was forming in his chest _was_.

Scanning up from the movements of his stomach, their gazes met simultaneously, Karma’s eyes containing a kind of warmth that seemed to burn him from the inside out. All Nagisa could really feel after that was butterflies.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're nearing D Day ;) 
> 
> As always, I hope you all enjoyed this one, and I strongly encourage comments and feedback. It really does motivate me to write and get these chapters out quicker for your reading pleasure! We hit 5k views, also, so yay! Thank you so much for your continued support.


	24. Truth Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Whilst cleaning the storage shed, the truth about Kayano comes out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hated writing this one but twas necessary for the plot

Despite the Headmaster trying to knock down the E Class building, and subsequently assassinate Korosensei himself, things had been pretty relaxed ever since the finals. With finals out of the way, the next thing on everyone’s mind would be high school entrance exams. The deadline for choosing was swiftly approaching, and Nagisa still wasn’t sure. He’d ended up just putting the school his mother had always talked about down on the form, considering it’s the only one he’d ever thought he had the option of attending. Now that his doors were wide open… Nagisa would just change it, when he set his mind on something.

It was the last day of term before the winter break, so not much in the way of lessons was going on. The real preparations would kick into high gear afterwards, probably. With the drama festival the day before, in which Sugino had given a weirdly haunting performance, everybody was just hanging around until they’d be allowed to go their separate ways for the break. Nagisa and the rest of his friends were gathered around Sugino’s desk, discussing the events of the festival, when Nagisa caught Kayano’s eye from outside the classroom.

Noticing that Nagisa had seen her, Kayano waved widely in a gesture Nagisa realised was meant to beckon. Curious to see what she wanted, Nagisa excused himself (the conversation not really involving him anyway) and went out of the classroom. Planning the production for the drama festival, Nagisa had seen a rare side to Kayano, the only other time he’d really experienced it being when she came up with that pudding assassination plan. He hadn’t realised she was so passionate about stage production, but she’d seemed firmly in her comfort zone.

Together they walked to the storage shed outside, and immediately Nagisa saw the issue. You couldn’t even see the floor, it was so fully covered in these blue bead things. Nagisa faintly remembered that Kayano had volunteered to clean up after their play, earlier.

 “Oh no, everything fell out and made a huge mess, huh?” He studied the scene.

Kayano flushed. “Yeah, my hand slipped while I was cleaning… These are the beads we used for the river in the play. We borrowed them from a prop company.”

“It’s fine,” Nagisa said, realising that the prospect of cleaning all of those sounded terrifying. “Let’s pick them up together.”

“Thanks!” Kayano replied, cheerfully.

For obvious reasons, Nagisa wasn’t too much help. He did, however, manage to find a broom. Though he was meant to be taking it easy, he figured doing a little bit of sweeping only counted as light exercise. Whilst he swept, Kayano sat on her knees with a dust pan. The progress was slow, but Nagisa didn’t really mind. He hadn’t spent much time with Kayano at all, recently.

“I see.” Nagisa turned, to see Korosensei had entered the room. “So this is why you stepped out. I’ll help you, too.”  

“Can we count on you, then?” Kayano smiled.

Taking advantage of his Mach 20 speed, Korosensei practically flew around the room, gathering up the little beads significantly faster than he and Kayano could have managed to do it. For a moment, Nagisa couldn’t help but think about how much things had changed since the start of the year, when Korosensei was a target and nothing else to them. Though he was leaving his back completely defenceless in order to help them, Nagisa knew shooting him was no use. If it were that easy, their year would have been a lot different.

“Something smells weird,” Korosensei commented.

“Oh, during the school festival, we smoked food in here. As for the sweetness…” Kayano looked at Nagisa. He felt himself flush, with the realisation his scent blocker had probably worn off. Nagisa wasn’t so obsessed with using it for class anymore, at least, it was pretty clear that he was pregnant, so there was no point. “We had a lot of different school events, huh?”

“Yeah.” Nagisa nodded. “But once we clean this up, they’ll be all over.”

Kayano smiled. “It really brings back memories. Like when Korosensei first came to the E Class...”

“Back then, you kids were complete amateurs, huh?” Korosensei said, like a proud parent.

“I failed at the beginning,” Nagisa remembered that sneak bomb attack at the start of the year. “And Sugino couldn’t do it either.”

Kayano sighed. “After that, Karma kun came, and he didn’t know much about Korosensei, so he asked you, right, Nagisa?”  

“I got really impatient when Itona kun came along… I thought he’d get him first,” Nagisa continued wistfully.

They really had been through a lot. When Nagisa had originally been dropped into the E Class for his appalling science grades, it felt like the end of the world. And then Korosensei had shown up, and his new role as assassin begun. So much had happened that he never thought would; their various victories against the A Class, a trip to a southern island, learning how to properly fight, getting pregnant…

Nagisa sighed. Somehow, he wouldn’t have wanted it any different. Perhaps Kayano was having the same sort of feelings, given how quiet she’d turned. Out of nowhere, a chill washed over Nagisa’s body. Sickeningly, it reminded him of one of his mother’s bad news. He’d learnt to tell those signs without even looking at her face, like invisible electricity through the air of a room.

Instincts never failing him, he turned, and Kayano was stood there with an expression that he’d never seen painted across her face. It was _cruel_ , sending a shiver through his bones. Nagisa’s eyes trailed up then, to the green tentacles sprouting from her neck. Before his brain even had time to process it, she used one of them to push Nagisa (with an almost careful pressure) into the corner of the room. Immediately afterwards, she seemed to trigger some kind of explosion. It was enough to knock him back slightly, but the wall caught his body.

Nagisa’s vision was obscured by it, but once he could see, both Korosensei and Kayano were gone. There was a gigantic pit in the centre of the room, as if this plan had been planned meticulously. He coughed, legs feeling a little wobbly, and then all he could hear was whatever commotion was taking place below.

“Nagisa kun? Are you okay?” Isogai rushed in, and stared at him in concern.

He had it in him to nod, albeit a little weakly. “I’m fine.”

“Are you _sure_?” He came over to him, sidestepping around the gigantic hole in the floor to offer him an arm.

Though he would have been a little annoyed at being babied ordinarily, Nagisa knew that given his recent medical history, he couldn’t exactly blame his classmate’s concern.

“Yeah,” he said, looking down at his stomach. “It’s okay. I can feel them moving.”

Regardless of that, Isogai still insisted on helping him outside. The rest of the class had gathered there, clearly confused about what was going on. Korosensei eventually burst out of the ground, panting heavily, and slight relief rolled over Nagisa. At least he was alive, still. Kind of ironic, really.

“Korosensei…” Nagisa acknowledged weakly.

“What in the world was that just now?” Isogai looked at him.

Before Korosensei could answer, Kayano appeared, her look almost completely alien to Nagisa. It was terrifying, how she’d seamlessly gone from one of his best friends to something unrecognisable. She made her purchase on the roof, looking down at them as if they were bugs underneath her thumb.

“Aw man, I attacked with all I had, too. I can’t believe I let him get away. I must have underestimated him.” Kayano announced, sounding

Korosensei finished recovering. “Kayano san… what in the world?”

“Sorry,” she said, “Kayano Kaede’s not my real name. I’m Yukimura Aguri’s little sister. You understand now, don’t you? Murderer.”

“Yukimura…” Hara thought aloud.

The name rung a bell in Nagisa’s memory, but with all of the chaos he couldn’t place it. Nagisa couldn’t tear his eyes from Kayano’s face. It was as though it belonged to somebody else, as foreign as the strangers he passed by on the steer.  

Kayano kept her glare. “It’s no use crying over spilt milk. I have to reset. I’ll try to kill you again tomorrow, Korosensei. I’ll let you know where beforehand. Now that I’ve fought you tentacle for tentacle, I know for sure. I can definitely kill you as I am right now.”

Just like that, she was gone, as fast as the wind. She used supernatural ability, a ‘gift’ from the tentacles, Nagisa supposed.

“Unthinkable.” Itona stated. Nagisa glanced his way, feeling his chest burn up. If anybody knew what was going on, it would be him. “If she grew tentacles without any maintenance, she would have been under constant hellish pain. There’s no way she could bear it without having it show on her face.”

“Not only that, but she’s Yukimura Aguri’s little sister?” Maehara said.

“Isn’t that our old homeroom teacher?” Sugino asked.

Nagisa felt his stomach turn. Wait, hadn’t Kayano said ‘murderer’? When Korosensei showed up, two weeks into the start of term, Nagisa had just assumed she was dead or something. Yukimura Sensei had been a much better teacher than he’d had for his first two years, but with everything he’d forgotten all about her. It was a highly uncomfortable feeling.

“I thought I’d seen Kayano before somewhere.” Mimura pulled out his phone, displaying an image of Kayano, long black hair on display. “I remembered after seeing her with her hair down and her harsher expression. Do you remember Mase Haruna? The young acting prodigy who could easily take on any role. It’s been a while since she left the entertainment business, and her hair and personality are completely different, so I didn’t notice…”

It felt kind of like Nagisa’s head had been dunked under water. He was aware of what was going on around him, but it was all muted, like he was floating along rather than existing solidly. Almost like everything was just a dream, Nagisa followed as the others drifted back inside the class building. With the revelation, everyone gathered around their phones, frantically searching the internet to confirm it.

Nagisa found one of the dramas his mother had been into, a few years ago. Taking it all in, there was no denying it was Kayano, though perhaps a couple of years younger. Even though there was no difference to her actual facial features, it was like staring at another person. Nagisa couldn’t help but wonder which one was the real Kayano.

The first day they met, when she’d transferred to Kunugigaoka, Nagisa had only sensed a warm presence. He’d never really been close friends with a girl before, but when Kayano had shown him a better way to tie his hair with a smile, Nagisa had felt happy to have her beside him in class. Then again, Kayano had been friends with everybody, but now he thought about it, she’d never let anybody get _too_ close.

Really opening his eyes, Nagisa saw it for what it was. To hide her true intentions for so long, Kayano was _smart_. Though Nagisa hadn’t really tried to make it that way, a lot of the attention had been on him this year. His bloodlust, and everything else, had been the perfect mask for her to hide her own behind. With everyone’s eyes trained on _him_ , she’d managed to slip into the background. Her cheerful, harmless, fun personality… was just acting?

“Korosensei,” Mimura asked, “Kayano called you a murderer. What happened in the past? We’ve built up trust with you for so long now, we won’t doubt you.”  

“But you have to tell us about your past.” Kataoka agreed.

Isogai swallowed. “If you don’t, nobody will be able to accept the current situation. That’s where we’re at right now.”  

“Very well,” Korosensei agreed, solemnly. “I’ll tell you everything about my past. But before that, Kayano san is an important member of the E Class. I will tell you when everyone in the class is together.” His phone buzzed with a text notification after he’d finished speaking. “It looks like Kayano san wants to meet this evening.”

Nagisa kept quiet whilst the details were ironed out. The only thing that kind of grounded him was the idea that Kayano wasn’t all the way gone. Surely she couldn’t have been lying to them all for a full year completely… They’d been so much together. Fixating on that, Nagisa could only hope that maybe they’d be able to help her, somehow, get her back the Kayano they all knew.

With that playing so intensely on everyone’s minds, it was a waiting game until the evening, the time Kayano had requested they meet. Nagisa found himself anxiously messing around with the hair bands he always wore on his wrists, the events of the day whirling around in his mind. With nothing to be gained from hanging around in class, everyone went home at the correct time, though there was no question that they’d all meet for Kayano’s sake.

“I have to save her,” Nagisa mumbled to himself, on the way down the mountain.

“ _Save_ her?” Karma cut in, jolting Nagisa out of his own head. He hadn’t even noticed he was walking so close. “I could kill her.”

Frighteningly, it didn’t sound like one of Karma’s regular threats that held no greater intention than to set a person on edge. The chill that ran through Nagisa told him that Karma probably really did mean it.

Nagisa stopped walking. “Wh-“

“She hurt you,” he gestured. “Or tried to.”

He still looked a little bit askew from the blast, but physically Nagisa was completely unharmed. “She didn’t! S-she… she pushed me out of the way,” Nagisa realised all of a sudden, and his heart leapt. Kayano had pushed him in the corner to stop him from being hurt! “I think she brought me with her because of my scent,” he flushed slightly, “to mask the smell of the anti-sensei bullets. She moved me away from the blast. I don’t think she’s any different than she has been all year. She’s still the same, genuine and harmless person.”

“So were _you_.”

Nagisa had no idea what he meant by that. Neither did Karma, by the looks of it. His eyes went a little wide, like he hadn’t meant to say it at all. When Nagisa didn’t voice a reply, Karma remained silent the rest of the way to the station, his way home, clearly deep in thought.

Sure enough, Kayano was at the meeting place she’d specified. It was a field out in the open, and her form was part the way masked by the tall grass surrounding them. As if they were about to face each other in battle, Nagisa and the rest of the class stood slightly behind Korosensei, with Kayano keeping her distance opposite.

“So you came… Then, let’s end this.” Kayano sliced the grass with her tentacles, an impossibly fast whip. “Korosensei, I’m the one who gave you your name. I’m practically your mother, so I’ll scold and destroy you.”

“Kayano san,” Korosensei said with urgency, “it is too dangerous to keep using those tentacles! If you do not remove them and get treated immediately your life could be in danger!”  

She didn’t appear to care. “What are you talking about? They’re in excellent condition. It’s no use trying to make me lose my composure with a bluff.”

“Kayano…” Nagisa couldn’t stop himself. Now he was sure she was in there, he had to know. “Was it all an act? Even when we were having fun? Or overcoming trials together with everyone?”

“It was all an act. I am an _actor_ , after all,” she confirmed, and then turned to the rest of them. “When Nagisa was defeated by Takaoka Sensei, I was so irritated, I wanted to join the fight too. When I was kidnapped by delinquents and kicked by the Reaper, I was so angry, I wanted to kill them. But I bore it and acted like a frail girl. Because if my identiy was found out before I killed him, I wouldn’t be able to avenge my sister.”

Fuwa swallowed. “Your sister… Yukimura Sensei?”

“It was so unfortunate that she was killed by Korosensei. She loved being a teacher. I heard a little about you all, too.” Kayano replied, casually.

“We know, Kayano,” Takebayashi said. “In March of our second year, we only had her for two short weeks, but she was a very passionate and good teacher.”  

Sugino looked over at her. “Would Korosensei kill Yukimura Sensei just like that? He’s never done anything that cruel in front of us before.”  

“Right? At least hear him out, Kaede chan.” Kurahashi begged.

Surprisingly, Karma was the next to open his mouth. “He was a teacher who even came all the way to my house when I was suspended. But are you really okay with this? I can’t imagine that what you’re doing now is the best way to solve this as an assassin.”  

It was sensible, coming from him. He’d decided Kayano wasn’t a real threat to Nagisa after all, then? Unfortunately, it didn’t seem like his words were helping. Nobody’s were.

“Your body probably feels hot, with just the nape of your neck cold,” Itona stepped up, using his knowledge on this to his advantage. “It’s the abnormal metabolism characteristic of those implanted tentacles. If you fight in that condition, you’ll really be in trouble. You’ll lose control with the heat and intense pain, and your life force will be sucked out by the tentacles. Worst case…”

Before he could finish, Kayano’s tentacles caught on fire.

“Shut up. Outsiders should be quiet. No matter the weakness or shortcoming, if it’s polished, it can become a weapon. You’re the one who taught me that, Korosensei. If my body’s so hot I can’t bear it, then I’ll make it even hotter and gather the heat in my tentacles!”  

“No! Any more, and-“ Korosensei tried.

She whipped the tentacles once more, creating a ring of fire separating her and Korosensei. By then, her tentacles were fully alight, but she didn’t seem fazed by it at all.

“I’m in the _best_ condition!” Kayano shrieked. “My whole body’s so sensitive that I won’t miss any opening right now.”

Nagisa couldn’t give up on her, not just yet. Every instinct in his body was rushing with a kind of protectiveness. It would be entirely wrong for him to stand by and just let his friend destroy herself like this. Especially if there was a danger of her dying… Nagisa had gone through this before himself, he’d been willing to put himself in harm’s way for the end goal. He’d grown better than that.

“Stop it Kayano!” He shouted as loud as he could. “This isn’t right! I learned, too!” It seemed he’d taken a few steps forwards, as he faintly felt Nakamura and Sugino’s arms wind around him in restraint. Still, Nagisa needed to make himself heard. “That if you sacrifice yourself to kill someone, there won’t be anything left behind!”

“I’m not planning on sacrificing myself, Nagisa. I will just… kill this guy.” Quick as a bolt of lightning, Kayano flew into the air and launched her attack. “Once I put my mind to something, I just keep rolling!”

Perhaps Nagisa had been wrong, somehow. By the looks of it, Kayano wasn’t acting at all. Were those really her true feelings? The fight before his eyes was an intense blur of tentacle on tentacle warfare, too hard for him to sense much of with his own vision. His heart clenched at the way the fiery tentacles moved around Kayano’s form. 

“I plucked off a piece!” She yelled, obviously having removed one of Korosensei’s tentacles. “It’s still moving!”

“In a mere ten or fifteen seconds of full out battle, her mind is already starting to be taken over by the tentacles…” Itona said, the dread clear from his tone.

“What’s the matter Korosensei?” Kayano taunted. “My head doesn’t hurt anymore. The pain feels good now!”

Itona looked down. “It’s too late if they’ve already taken her over that much. Whether or not she accomplishes her revenge, a few minutes after the end of the battle, I think she’ll die.”

Was this really the assassination Kayano wanted to carry out? Even if she did kill him, she wouldn’t live to see the results. It was terrifying, how far revenge could drive someone. Nagisa didn’t know what he’d _do_ if she died, just like that.

“Come one! Die, Korosensei!” Kayano shouted. “Die! Die! Die!”

“Looks more like _she’s_ gonna die any minute now” Maehara said.

“Can’t we do anything?” Sugino glanced around frantically. “Do we just stand by and watch her get eaten away?”  

Out of nowhere, Korosensei’s face popped up between the flames. “Class!”

“Korosensei?!” Nagisa jolted.

“Why just your face?” Sugaya asked.

“It’s a clone! I don’t have much leeway with Kayano san’s ferocious attacks! It’s all I can do to leave an afterimage of my face!” Korosensei explained, in between getting attacked. “We have to remove her tentacles ASAP! They’re only putting off all that abnormal heat because she’s not giving any thought to her own survival! At this rate, the tentacles will suck out her life force and she’ll die! But! As long as her bloodlust matches that of her tentacles, they’ll be rooted to her nerves, impossible to remove! We don’t have the time to talk her down like we did with Itona kun!”

Hayami swallowed. “Then how can we…”

“There’s only one way: I’ll pull them out as we fight. I’ll let her hit my greatest weak spot: my heart, located just underneath my tie. If it’s completely destroyed, I’ll die. If I can make her feel like she did me in, her tentacles’ bloodlust will weaken for a moment, if only for a bit. And in that moment, one of you will have to make Kayano san forget her bloodlust.”

“Forget it? But how?” Hazama asked.

“Whatever works. Anything to get her mind off assassination. It’s the only thing I can’t do. If the target of her bloodlust were to try any funny business, her bloodlust would only intensify. But if you can quell that bloodlust, the tentacles’ bond with her would momentarily be broken, and I might be able to remove them with minimal damage!”

“And Kayano’s tentacles would be on your heart the whole time?” Mimura realised. “Wouldn’t you die first?”  

Korosensei appeared to break a sweat. “If I’m lucky, I’ll postpone that fateful, final moment… But I’d say the odds of me dying are about fifty fifty.”

“No!” Kataoka protested

“But you know… For me, the entire class not being able to graduate uneventfully is even worse than dying.”

As the class began to argue over what to do, the gears in Nagisa’s mind began to turn. He wasn’t going to let this end here. Nagisa’s best chance of incapacitating somebody was his clap stunner, now he’d improved it. Considering everything, the wavelength of her consciousness was too messed up for Nagisa to take advantage of and manipulate. Any weapons, guns or knives, would do more harm than good.

When Kayano struck, tentacles shoved in the centre of Korosensei’s chest, Nagisa knew there was no time. Korosensei wrapped his tentacles around her to hold her still, and Nagisa found himself walking towards them. He’d made a promise to himself to stay out of danger, but aside from the lick of the flames, Nagisa was certain she was no danger to him.

There was only one technique left at Nagisa’s disposal. He’d only fully used it twice, both having the desired result. When he used it on Asano, to take him out and avoid any questioned, the boy had gone straight down. Somehow, he’d never imagined that it’d work on Karma. Nagisa still didn’t know why exactly he’s used the kiss technique on him, rather than just quitting – it wasn’t as if he’d cared about winning Bitch Sensei’s contest. But there was just something infuriating about the way Karma had been kissing him, making his head spin with dizziness. An electric urge had just rolled through him, a desperation to prove that he could hold just as much power, that Karma couldn’t just walk over him like a blushing maiden. It had also been a little bit _fun_. 

As he stepped right in front of Kayano’s struggling form, the shouts of his classmates were drowned out by his own concentration. This was different from the other times, Kayano’s life lay on the line. It was a little awkward with the size of his stomach, but with a slight twist, they were mostly aligned. He dove in quickly, pressing a kiss to her lips. Wasting no time, he gripped her shoulder, and pried her mouth open with his own lips. Eyes closed in focus, he replicated Bitch Sensei’s kiss technique, his tongue his blade. It _can’t_ have all been an act. They’d had fun together. There was no way it was all revenge. Her body trembled in his arms, and then she collapsed.

“Korosensei… will this work?” Nagisa detached their lips, holding her body out like an offering.

“Full marks Nagisa kun!” Korosensei agreed. “They’ll come out now!”

He got to work quickly, detaching the tentacles from Kayano’s neck. Nagisa couldn’t help but wince at the way her unconscious body writhed at the intense strain it was under. It didn’t take very long for them to be out, though, and finally her body seemed to relax.

“Does this mean Kayano san is okay now?” Okuda asked.

“Yes… probably.” Korosensei answered. “She’ll need absolute rest for a while.”

Without warning, Nakamura wrapped an arm around his shoulder.“Hey prince charming! Shutting her down with a kiss, eh? Nice!”  

Feeling shameful, Nagisa dropped his eyes to the ground. “I thought it was a good way to make her forget her bloodlust. I’ll apologise to her later.”  

“Fourteen hits on a ten second kiss?” Bitch Sensei came close to him, tilting his chin up her finger. “You’re getting sloppy.”

“’Hits’?”

She smirked. “I trained you on forced, indiscriminate French kisses. You should have been able to make forty.”

“Mmm,” Maehara cut in. “Twenty five’s tight for me.”

“God I hate this place. I can just about make it to twenty,” Kataoka complained.

The ribbing was expected, Nagisa supposed. As long as it meant Kayano was safe… he could take it. Though Kama had also approached him with Nakamura, he was being uncharacteristically silent. If anything, Nagisa would have expected him to be the _first_ to start making fun. Nagisa looked over his shoulder at him, noticing something he could only describe as forced neutrality in his eyes. Was Karma still mad about what Kayano did in the storage shed, after all?

Before Nagisa could find out, Korosensei started choking.

“Koro sensei?!”

“I’m fine,” he forced out. “It’ll just take a while for my heart to recover. I’m sure there’s something you’d like to hear me say, but please, wait just a little longer.”

Out of nowhere, a gun shot was fired. Nagisa whipped his head around in the direction of the noise, which was contained to a nearby piece of raised land. Instantly, when he saw two cloaked figures, he recognised one as Shiro. How could he not, given how much trouble the guy had caused?

 “Quit playing up the deathbed angle,” Shiro sneered. “You’re still alive enough to dodge. Useless girl… She’d give her own life for that revenge narrative of hers- you’d think she could’ve done a little better than this. You’re quite the monster. Just how many assassins have you driven away in a single year? But there are still two of them right here.” He removed his mask, exposing his dark hair and artificial eye. “I’m the last one. You took everything away… and I’ll make you pay for it with your life.”

“The genius scientist, with cloaked face and altered voice…” Korosensei trailed. “So it is you, Yanagisawa.”

Shiro, or Yanagisawa (whoever that was), simply looked down at him. “Come, two point zero. March will bring a perfect death for an accursed life.”

They left, before anything else could be said. Before Nagisa’s mind could even catch up to whatever _that_ was about, Kayano spluttered, eyes blinking open. All Nagisa could think after that was _thank god she’s conscious_.

 “I...”

“Kayano san,” Korosensei said, “thank goodness.” 

Nagisa swallowed. “Kayano… are you okay?”

“Uh huh…” She turned her face away from him. Nagisa hoped she wasn’t mad about the kiss… he’d definitely have to think of a really good way to apologise for that.  

“Kayano chi…” Okano let out.

She sat up a little, looking around their class with a shameful expression. “It was pure bloodlust at first… But as I spent time with Korosensei, I started losing my conviction in that bloodlust. Like, doesn’t this teacher have some circumstances I don’t know about? And shouldn’t I find out what they are before I kill him? But that’s when the bloodlust in my tentacles swelled forth. They wouldn’t let me not do it. How _dumb_. Everybody was genuinely enjoying their assassinations while I wasted the year on plain old revenge.”

After all of that, Nagisa had to say _something_. Hesitating for a moment on exactly what, Nagisa drew his mind to all that happened this year. There was no use in calculating a good response to her, he decided. Best to just speak directly from the heart.

“Kayano… Once you taught me this hairstyle, I stopped fretting about my long hair. And like you said, everyone liked the name ‘Korosensei’ – we’ve been using it all year. It doesn’t matter what you were after. We all made you our friend, together. No matter how much you suffered on your own, we can’t let you say it was all an act – not all those days you were smiling right there with us. Korosensei promised to tell us everything once we were all together. He’s not a saint. We know he doesn’t always do the right thing. But let’s hear him out. All of us – together.” 

“Yeah… Thanks.” Kayano looked at Nagisa, then, and burst into tears. “I can stop acting now.”

Nagisa… wasn’t _good_ with crying. He got the impression it was good tears, at the very least. She was being comforted by some of the girls, so he didn’t feel too bad.

“Korosensei…” Isogai said, “whatever’s in your past… we’ll accept it, as long as it’s the truth.”  

Korosensei nodded. “I wanted never to talk about my past if I could help it. But I see I have to. I don’t want to lose your trust, the bond we share. This past summer, on that southern island, Karasuma sensei said of Irina sensei, ‘the better the assassin the broader her skill set’. I think that’s relevant here. This E Class is the first I’ve ever taught. Even so, I’ve managed to teach you just about every subject without a hitch. Why do you think that is? That’s right: Until two years ago, I was the assassin known as the Reaper. And one more thing… Even if you do nothing, I’ll die come March. Either I die alone or the Earth dies with me: that’s the only part of the future an assassination can change.”

With that, Korosensei began to talk.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jealous Karma? Jealous Karma... Don't worry, I promise a lot of fluff SOON. 
> 
> I have no idea how this chapter got so long... 
> 
> As always, comments are my top motivation!


	25. New Year Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With the second term over and the winter break in swing, Nagisa has no other choice but to spend it with Karma.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I make it sound like I have an actual summary for this, but it's literally just 6k words of domestic fluff. I hope you're all happy :')

After Korosensei had told them all the truth about his past, the mood had been _weird_. With all that had already happened that day, his teacher’s backstory was near impossible to fully comprehend. Nagisa could only describe the feeling it left as hollowness. After all they’d been through, thinking of Korosensei as a monster they had to kill for the good of the earth, it was a bitter pill to swallow.

Defeated, Nagisa had collapsed straight into bed and fallen asleep for what felt like years. Despite how uncomfortable he was recently, usually taking at least an hour before his body was comfortable enough to relax, the emotional toll had won out that night. Kayano had been taken to hospital after Korosensei’s speech, though Nagisa was sure she wouldn’t be in any real danger. He tried to remind himself that being medically monitored wasn’t the end of the world.

Even after a night’s rest, Nagisa didn’t feel much better. Suddenly, assassination felt fundamentally _wrong_. Killing had come so naturally to him, his secret talent… but Korosensei didn’t deserve to be killed. Then again, if he wasn’t their target, then what had they been doing all year? The idea of reverting back to a regular student/teacher relationship sat uncomfortably with him.

At breakfast, Nagisa played with his rice, swirling it around the bowl with his chopsticks aimlessly. It seemed like the first time in his recent memory he wasn’t hungry. Unfortunately, that probably wouldn’t last very long.

“What are you, a little kid?” Asano commented from across the table.

It was actually pretty rare that they’d eat together. Most of the time, Asano was closed off, electing to say in his own room. Aside from studying, and the few times Nagisa had hung out with him in there, he had no idea _what_ he did there… inventing some kind of plot, probably. Nagisa had been surprised to see him already sipping on his tea, that morning, as Toboso finished preparing the food.

“I’m sorry,” Nagisa said, pushing the bowl away from him. “I can’t eat anymore.”

He cocked his head. “Did something happen?”

Was this Asano’s friendship? It still felt a little strange, speaking to him like he would anybody else. Though, Nagisa still had to hold himself back. There was no way he could explain that one of his best friends had been living with a false identity all year, had tried to murder their teacher, and was now in hospital recovering from the weapons she’d implanted into her own body. He was under written agreement with the government that he wouldn’t disclose basically any of that information.

“I’m just tired,” Nagisa decided on, “end of term, and everything.”

Asano pushed his own bowl forwards, signifying he was done. “About that,” he exhaled heavily, “my father’s being… strange.”

“O-oh?” Nagisa _had_ wondered if anything had changed, after everything at school had gone down the way it did.

“Today’s Christmas,” he announced, as if Nagisa didn’t know the date. Though he’d never celebrated it, it was hard to miss the apparel everywhere. “My father says he’ll be here this afternoon, until after the New Year.”

Funnily enough, Nagisa’s first reaction was happiness for Asano’s sake. Though he didn’t show it, Nagisa could see underneath the surface that really, he yearned for a normal relationship with his father. Though, actually being present in his own home for more than an hour shouldn’t be such a revelation. Regardless, it showed some kind of willingness to spend time with his son. Perhaps he really was turning his act around, after all.

“I didn’t think he’d be the type to care about Christmas,” Nagisa said.

Asano shrugged. “He picked it up back in his college days in America, apparently. Anyway,” he looked slightly nervous, “unless you want to stay completely silent in your room for several days…”

He understood. Though, it didn’t freak him out as much as it probably should’ve. Nagisa’s brain had had enough shock go through it to last a life time, these last few days, so he supposed there wasn’t any capacity for panic left in there. 

“Don’t worry,” Nagisa said cheerfully, “I’ll sort something out.”

* * *

“I’m sorry about this,” Nagisa said, small bag of possessions thrown over his shoulder.

Karma leant against the doorframe. “You look like a stray puppy with fleas.”

Ignoring the fleas part, he had a point. Nagisa just sighed, and took a step inside Karma’s house,  once he’d moved out of the way. He was a little surprised Karma had even agreed to it so readily, honestly. Perhaps Nagisa should have felt more nervous, about spending an unsupervised week in Karma’s company. It wasn’t like he had much of another choice, though. _Maybe_ he could have asked Sugino, but as far as Nagisa knew, his family were pretty traditional. He didn’t want to get him any kind of trouble, by association.

“Thirsty?” Karma asked, once Nagisa had properly entered, set down his bag, and removed his shoes.

He was, a little, but Nagisa didn’t want to be even more of a charity case. “Not really.”

Karma’s stance remained casual. “How about some food, then?”

Nagisa was about to decline him again, but his stomach had a mind of its own. Considering he’d mostly skipped breakfast, it showed immediate interest, grumbling embarrassingly loudly. At this the disappearance of his appetite had only been a brief thing…

They didn’t make any agreement, but Nagisa found himself following Karma into the kitchen. It was more than a little awkward, but he sat down on one of the bar stools that were set up next to the counter. Fondly, Nagisa remembered one of the few times he visited Karma’s home when they were younger. Karma had been showing off, spinning around on one of the stalls until he actually fell off it. Nagisa had laughed so hard his apple juice came out of his nose… though he’d had to hide it when Karma’s mother started telling her son off. His parents were around a lot more, back then.

As Karma begun making them sandwiches, Nagisa couldn’t help but let his mind wonder. He’d only ever met Karma’s parents a few times. He took after his mother, Nagisa had thought privately. Karma’s father seemed a little more reserved, though maybe that was just because of how tall he was (Nagisa was under five foot back then). He did remember the man blinking with confusion when Nagisa explained that _no, he wasn’t a girl_.

“So,” Karma said, sliding the food over. “What do you want to do?”

Nagisa took a bite, and his eyes fluttered shut. He hadn’t been paying attention to what Karma had put in it, but the flavour was heavenly. Though he knew Karma always did pretty well in home ec, but that was nothing to pay special attention to. Karma did well in _every_ subject, after all. In the end, after they were done with the food, they just ended up watching movies in the living room.

It was a good distraction from everything that had been going on. A couple of them were only English with Japanese subtitles, so Nagisa was too busy focusing on that than letting his mind wander. He was suddenly very thankful for Karma’s presence, and dry comments over now and then to keep Nagisa grounded to his surroundings.

Eventually, after a break for ‘dinner’ (mostly just dry snack foods), the late evening came. Nagisa felt his eyes begin to drop halfway through some psychological horror film, none of the spooky atmosphere affecting him particularly. That meant only one thing; it was time for bed.

“I’ll go get the futon,” Karma said, as though it didn’t bother him.

They were sleeping in the same room, then? It wasn’t a big deal, Nagisa forced himself to remember. Friends had sleepovers all the time. Still, he cringed at the idea of sleeping on one in his condition. Beggars can’t be choosers. Nagisa followed him to his bedroom, immediately affronted by alpha scent. The amount of incense around the house masked the scent from other locations, but _here..._ Swallowing dryly, Nagisa made his way over to the futon, bracing himself for the pain of lowering his body.

“You’re not sleeping on that thing,” Karma said, slightly sternly.

Nagisa looked over. “B-but it’s your bed.”

“You’ll never get back off it,” Karma rolled his eyes. “It’s not a big deal. What, unless you want to _share_.”

He bit his lip. Would that be so terrible? He knew _girls_ did it, all the time, so… “Alright.”

Karma’s face turned an odd shade of pink, like he hadn’t been expecting that answer out of Nagisa. Well, Karma had a pretty large double bed. They could probably both fit on it, without touching too closely or anything. Shamefully, Nagisa remembered his moment of weakness when he was in hospital, when he’d asked Karma to hold and comfort him. It hadn’t been a big deal _then._

Then came the next issue – pyjamas. All the way back when his mother had originally thrown him out, Nagisa hadn’t had time to think practically about what he was taking. He hadn’t really thought about nightwear, and it hadn’t actually been an issue for quite a while. Usually, he’d just sleep in his underwear or something. It wasn’t like he’d never been in his underwear in front of Karma before… they’d had to change for PE together for three years.

Nagisa swallowed, and let his trousers pool to the floor, averting his eyes from Karma’s body. Immediately, he wished he’d kept the trousers on, despite how uncomfortable that would be. He was definitely over thinking it. Nagisa decided to at least keep the jumper he was wearing on, for a bit of extra warmth. It was technically Karma’s, though, back when he’d given Nagisa a bunch of clothes.

Keeping his eyes planted on the floor, Nagisa went over to the bed. The moment he sat down on it, his mind went blank. Instead of worrying about what he looked like, he had to worry at what his instincts were screaming at him to do. Currently, that was to rub himself into the covers and pillows and burry himself in Karma’s raw scent. Not wanting to look like a crazy person, Nagisa put all of his concentration into resisting that urge.

He barely noticed Karma sit down beside him, ready for bed himself. He’d forgone any kind of shirt, but at least had his legs covered with sweat pants. A little scared of what he’d do if he tried to plant his head down and immediately try to fall asleep, with his body in its over sensitised state, Nagisa bit his lip and thought of something to distract himself. Wracking his brain for a moment (incredibly forgetful, in its current state), Nagisa quickly thought of something. He twisted his body, ignoring the pain that came with that, and reached over the bed for his bag.

“H-hang on a second,” he said, sensing Karma was about to ask what he was doing. Thankfully, it didn’t take him long to find what he was looking for. “Here you go,” Nagisa said, handing over the miniscule package.

Karma looked down at it as though it was a bomb about to explode in his hands. “For me?”

“Mm,” Nagisa smiled. “Happy birthday, Karma kun! Uhm… It’s not much,” he admitted, “I only have a little bit of money from tutoring Sakura chan.”

His eyes went wide, as he untied the draw strings. Thankfully, the shop owner had been kind enough to offer Nagisa a tiny bag, not unlike one you’d get with jewellery, so he didn’t have to worry about wrapping it up. Nagisa couldn’t stop his heart from thumping, as Karma took his gift out and admired it. He could only hope he wouldn’t _hate_ it.

“I was surprised to find it,” Nagisa said quickly. “It was just in that shop in town, you know,” his eyes darted downwards, “that one with all the Harry Potter stuff.”

For a movie that hadn’t even been released in Japan yet (a fact that Nagisa was very frustrated about), he _was_ surprised to see merchandise. Still, when Nagisa had seen a Sonic Ninja pin hanging up, he felt compelled to get it. It was only small, no bigger than his thumbprint, with the character illustrated in the chibi style.

Karma looked like he wanted to say something, but instead smiled. His genuine smile, that was, not the smirk he often wore when he was up to something. 

“Thanks,” he put it down on his bedside table.

Nagisa was a little too overwhelmed for him to make a big deal out of the gift, so he smiled too, and nodded. It would have been weird for Karma to fling his arms around him in gratitude, or something. This was comfortable, the space they were meant to share.

“Are you happy to be fifteen now?” He questioned, dying to change the subject.

Reclining, Karma stretched a little bit. “It doesn’t feel much different.”

It wasn’t like they were average fifteen year olds. First and foremost, they were assassins, and after that… they’d be _parents_. Nagisa wrinkled his nose at that, the concept still sounding foreign. He’d just about got used to being pregnant, but after that… At the thought, it seemed Akuma was bored of being calm, especially as Nagisa wasn’t doing anything interesting.

“Ah,” he let out, at a strong kick. “Ouch.”

The signature grin had returned to Karma’s face. “Is Akuma chan throwing me a birthday party?”

Nagisa hunched over slightly. “Feels like it.” He sighed, rolling the material of the jumper up slightly. It never really did much, but Nagisa could at least try resting the flat of his palm against his skin. After a few seconds

“Eugh,” Karma said, out of nowhere.

That sounded worrying. “W-what is it?”

“I think I can… see a foot?”

Nagisa peeled his eyes opened, and looked down at his stomach. Sure enough, he could see his skin literally lift up, as Akuma moved around. Feeling it was one thing, but seeing it? “That’s kind of gross.”

“It looks like something out of that movie Alien.”

“W-what’s that?”

Leaning over for his phone, Karma quickly typed something into YouTube. He passed Nagisa the screen, and Nagisa had slam a hand over his mouth at the video. Though horror didn’t really bother him (aside from jump scares), and the special effects were clearly dated, he still felt the strong urge to puke after witnessing that.

“A-akuma’s not coming out like that,” Nagisa said, somewhat defensively, despite how much it looked like his skin could rip open.

Karma was paying more attention to his stomach. “They’re giving me a high five,” he announced.

“Don’t encourage it!” He complained. ‘ _Pregnancy is beautiful_ ’, people said, ‘ _a magical experience’_! When he regained his physical abilities, Nagisa was going to punch whoever came up with that notion. It was much like carrying around a parasite at all times. Still, he let Karma do what he wanted, trying his best not to cringe at the violent movements.

He’d never say it out loud, but Karma’s warm hands made him feel relaxed, despite the pain. As if he was being lulled back into his exhausted state, Nagisa felt his eyes begin to drop. Karma’s voice (Nagisa wasn’t sure what he was saying) was soothing, soft when he spoke to his bump. He knew that it would be bad to fall asleep like that, though, no matter how good it felt right then and there.

“Go to sleep, Nagisa kun,” Karma eventually said, loud enough to force Nagisa’s eyes open.

He was so exhausted. “Akuma doesn’t want to,” he muttered bitterly, the twist in his stomach proving it. 

“Come on,” he said, though it wasn’t that demanding, “how do you usually sleep?”

Nagisa would really like to be lying on his back, but Akuma was far too high up for that. If he even tried it, he probably wouldn’t be able to sleep. Wordlessly, he shifted onto his side, wrapping the loose sleeves of Karma’s jumper over his hands like mittens. Groaning lightly in frustration, Nagisa reached for one of the pillows, sacrificing the head comfort for something to rest his stomach on.

Without warning, he was enveloped in warmth. Perhaps Nagisa would have freaked out and complained, if he wasn’t instantly soothed. Karma’s arm draped over his body, resting easily on the swollen bump. He pressed up close, chest resting against Nagisa’s sore back, with his chin Nagisa’s shoulder. Slowly, Nagisa sensed comforting pheromones trickle out into the air of the room. Despite how at home Karma’s scent was making him feel, Nagisa forced himself to remember that despite everything, he wasn’t actually his alpha.

“There can’t be much room left in there,” Karma murmured, slipping his hand against his skin, to stroke it soothingly.

By all logic, Karma’s gentle and tired voice right against his ear and his touch should have had the opposite of a calming effect, but Nagisa suddenly felt drowsy, flooded with pheromones that were more protective in nature. Why was he allowing this level of intimacy, again? He almost had the urge to purr, nuzzling up closer to his alp- _Karma_. Akuma agreed, finally settling down after a few final firm kicks.

They woke up in the same position, practically. Nagisa came back to the land of the living, slowly and blinking with confusion. For a moment, he forgot where he was, staring at unfamiliar walls. As the seconds ticked by, though, Nagisa became very aware of the arm that was draped over him, and the warm breath that was tickling the back of his neck.

“Uh, Karma kun,” he said, panicking slightly.

It didn’t exactly have the desired effect. If anything, Karma just clutched him tighter, and took a very deep inhale. With great embarrassment, Nagisa realised his nose was pressed right up against his scent glands. None of his scent blocker was lingering to cover him, pheromones that Nagisa hadn’t learnt to control or understand yet. Even more horrifyingly, it felt _good_. With every deep breath, Karma’s ribcage heaving against Nagisa’s back, Nagisa felt more content. He didn’t even _care_ that Karma was literally _scenting_ him.

The moment didn’t last much longer. As if Karma had suddenly suffered from cardiac arrest, he let go of Nagisa, flipping his body away so fast he bounded hard against the mattress.

“Morning,” he said, strained.

Without the pheromones relaxing him, Nagisa became aware of the intense pressure signifying he needed to pee. At least Akuma wasn’t giving him the punching bag morning alarm treatment, even if they were apparently using his bladder as a cushion. Well, it was an excuse to end whatever this was. Nagisa shifted out of bed, wincing as he stood up.

“I’m going to shower,” he decided to say on a whim. At least that would neutralise his scent, just a little.

Grabbing the sheet in bunches to gather it around his form, Karma nodded. “You know where it is, right?”

Perhaps Karma was just shy in the mornings? To be honest, the idea of Karma being shy at all sounded a little stupid… but maybe it was just one of those things where his confidence needed an hour to recharge. Whatever the case, Nagisa made his way to the bathroom. Once he’d emptied his bladder, he stripped off his clothes and turned the shower on.

The warm water was instantly soothing, especially in juxtaposition to the cold weather surrounding them. Nagisa could have spent hours in there, allowing his muscles to relax under the scalding spray. Since it was bare, Nagisa decided to lightly poke the skin of his stomach. By the feel of it, Akuma hadn’t quite woken up yet (a fact he was grateful for), so there was no mysterious skin raising.

Nagisa regrettably turned off the shower, and the soothing comfort it gave him. He’d like nothing more than to soak even further in the bath, but that simply wasn’t happening. Even if he somehow managed to safely lower himself into it, he seriously doubted his ability to get back out again afterwards. Instead, he towelled himself down and changed into his limited supply of clean clothes for the day.

When he returned to Karma’s bedroom, after the cleanliness of the shower, the scent appeared to be significantly stronger. Considering he was far less exhausted, it made Nagisa’s mouth begin to water, a fact that made him want to run away in shame. Karma was for the most part where Nagisa had left him, although he looked a little different. He was flushed and sweaty, slightly dishevelled. Nagisa had to wonder what he’d even been doing whilst he was gone. By appearances, running laps around the room or doing push ups or something.

Much like the day before, neither of them really knew what to do next. The next few days of their winter break passed exactly like that. They found something to amuse themselves with, at least. When they got bored of movies, they played video games, or just generally existed in each other’s company. Despite not having _that_ much to do, Nagisa never quite felt devastatingly bored. After all, Karma probably was his best friend. It was just like having an extended sleep over.

The last straw came when they turned to card games for entertainment, though. As Karma dealt out the cards and explained the rules, Nagisa finally began to notice a bit of stir craziness set in. It wasn’t as if Karma’s house was dirty (surprisingly, considering he basically lived alone, it was very clean), but Nagisa began to notice some _weird_ things. One of Karma’s text books, for example, wasn’t pushed into the book shelf all the way, and it was _irritating_ him. Nagisa just had this deep urge to fix it.

“Show me your cards,” Karma said, jolting Nagisa out of it.

Nagisa sighed, letting the cards he’d drawn fall flat on the table. He understood the appeal of poker, and kind of grasped the rules, but he didn’t think he’d ever be good at it. There was a lot of strategy involved by the sounds of it, and whilst Nagisa was good at founding the perfect plan to guarantee himself a result when he needed to, this was a lot longer. It was drawn out, involved a lot of factors, and played more into Karma’s skills. Nagisa got the feeling he was actually _really_ skilled at this game.

Karma looked them over. “That’s a straight.”

“Do I win?” Nagisa asked, studying them.

Letting his own two cards fall, Karma smirked devilishly. “Straight _flush_.”

Thankfully, they weren’t playing for anything. That was most of the game, apparently. Not in the cards, but in misleading the opponents. Nagisa would be frightened to face Karma if there were actual bets in play, though he didn’t have much of value in the first place.

“So,” Karma said, “want to play for real?”

Nagisa squirmed at that idea. “Do you mind if I clean?”

“ _Huh_?”

Turning a brand new shade of crimson, Nagisa realised he’d voiced his desire out loud. He wanted to go outside and dig a hole to burry himself in. The worst part was, Nagisa didn’t have much of a clear and rational explanation as to why he’d requested such a thing. Now he just looked _insane_ , probably. He had to think of something _fast_.

“It’s New Year’s Eve!” Nagisa remembered, suddenly. Good, that was an excuse. “It feels weird to not be cleaning today.”

Karma shrugged. “My parents never really celebrated it.”

Come to think of it, even despite his weird urges, it did feel kind of odd to be missing all parts of the celebration. “Can we?”

“Sure.”

Nagisa had never felt so satisfied. He’d never been a fan of cleaning, _ever_. Sure, he wasn’t particularly messy – his mother would have screamed at him for hours – but it wasn’t exactly a hobby of his. Every item he lined up perfectly, his heart practically burst with joy. Maybe he really was going insane… The extra energy wasn’t unwelcome, though.

“What do you do for the holidays, then?” Nagisa asked eventually.

Karma considered it for a moment. “Not a lot. My parents took me to Diwali in Varanasi one time… but that’s earlier in the year.”

“Where’s that?”

“North of India,” he said casually. “I liked the lights.”

Nagisa nodded, turning his attention back to the task at hand. After making sure the furniture was in perfect alignment, it was time to make it spotless. His next enemy was the bookcase. He’d dusted all the individual shelves, but then there was the very top of it… He just knew there was dust up there. Unfortunately, he wasn’t quite tall enough to reach it. Nagisa attempted to balance on his tip toes, stretching his arm as far as it could go.

He yelped as hands latched onto his hips, lifting him into the air. “Karma kun!”

Karma didn’t respond, but he did a terrible job of masking his laugh.  

“You could have just done it yourself,” Nagisa complained, but dusted up there anyway.

After they finished up downstairs, they moved on to upstairs. There wasn’t as much to do, but it still made Nagisa much more relaxed. His final target was Karma’s bedroom. It really _was_ very tidy already, which made sense, but something under the surface of Nagisa’s skin still squirmed.

Karma scratched the back of his neck. “I’m getting a drink… You can start if you want.”

Nagisa swallowed, as he was left alone. What Karma was giving him permission to do was surely… intimate. Funnily enough, there was nothing he immediately wanted to fix, yet the itch was still present. Tentatively, he stepped over to the closet, assuming maybe something would have been hung up incorrectly.

He opened it, and breathed in deeply, more of Karma’s natural scent filling his lungs. Most alphas that Nagisa happened to pass smelt a lot like dirt or metal, not unpleasantly so. Nagisa couldn’t put his finger on exactly what Karma’s scent reminded him of, other that it felt a lot warmer and inviting (when he was relaxed, that is).

Before he even noticed what he was doing, he’d taken one of Karma’s shirts from the hanger, and was pressing it into his nose. Once he remembered how creepy that was, borderline stalkerish in fact, Nagisa quickly tossed it away, causing it to land on the bed. He chewed his lip, an urge racing through him. Before he could decide against it, he took another shirt, and then another. Soon, there was a pile of clothes covering the sheets.

It wasn’t _good_ enough. Nagisa went over to the bed, and began to examine his work. Hands working almost on autopilot, he arranged the clothes nicely, to his own liking. It became almost like a ring in the end, the bottom lined with fabric, with a thicker layer to keep the edges defined. Nagisa took a step back, looking it over. It was nice, and he really wanted to lie in it, but something was missing…

Turning his head, Nagisa noticed that Karma’s school blazer was draped over the back of his desk chair. _Perfect_. Locking onto his target, Nagisa snatched it carefully, and began to consider where to position it. It would clearly work as some kind of centrepiece… Maybe it would look nice next to the pillows.

Out of nowhere, Karma forced a cough, making Nagisa practically jump out of his bones. “What, are you _nesting_ or someth-“ His eyes fell from Nagisa’s guilty form to the bed. “Oh.”

Finally, Nagisa’s sense returned, and he dropped the blazer. It seemed he really _had_ been building a nest. Out of Karma’s clothes. On his bed. Without any permission to do so. Well, that settled it. Nagisa was never looking Karma in the eye again. He was tempted to go outside, dig a hole, and burry himself six feet under.

“U-uhm…”

Karma kept his cool, though, sauntering over. “Looks comfy.”

Nagisa couldn’t help but flush at his approval, his inner omega incredibly pleased. “I’m sorry… I’ll put it all back.”

Like it was a crash mat, Karma flopped back onto it. He reclined, making a big deal out of sighing with his shit eating grin plastered across his face. “Is this why you wanted to clean?”

Trying to pretend his brain wasn’t short circuiting, Nagisa averted his eyes. “M-maybe.”

Karma kicked himself back up again. “If we’re doing this tradition thing, I was thinking of cooking soba noodles.”

It was all so _casual_. Nagisa agreed to the noodles, following Karma back down to the kitchen. He wasn’t nearly as good at cooking, but he could at least attempt to help. Finally, though, Nagisa felt _satiated_. That realisation suddenly brought along hollowness. He and Karma were essentially playing house, and whilst their mutual comfort in each other’s presence made his heart burst with happiness, dread wasn’t far behind. This was going to end badly, Nagisa just knew it. You couldn’t really exist in a perfect little bubble. Pretending… it was only going to hurt more in the long run.

He tried to remind himself that, late at night. The cleaning had worn him out, but Nagisa didn’t want the New Year to pass without him. Despite the coldness of outside, Nagisa’s body felt pretty hot. They ended up sitting outside, not saying much to each other. He tried to remember what his life had been like, this time one year ago.

Honestly, Nagisa probably wouldn’t even recognise his past self.

Looking up at the sky, the crescent moon shining down on them, Nagisa felt very small. His breath caught, at the sound of the first bell to signify the start of the New Year. Even as a little kid, he’d loved listening to them. As was tradition, they rung out another hundred and seven times, filling the air with their melody. Nagisa’s eyes slipped closed, taking in the sound.

When the skies fell silent again, Nagisa smiled. “Happy New Year, Karma kun.”

“Happy New Year,” he replied, eyes lost in the constellations.

A customary kick came to his stomach. Nagisa sighed, looking down at it. _Yes, Akuma, happy New Year to you too_.

They went back inside, after the festivity was over. Though Nagisa had become (frighteningly quickly) accustomed to sleeping beside Karma, sleeping with him in a nest was something different entirely. It was _heavy._ Karma either didn’t recognise or care about the significance, relaxing pretty quickly, though Nagisa could tell he was awake.

Nagisa felt _restless_. He shifted into several positions, impatient to find one that was going to work for him. To make matters worse, his stomach decided to complain. He knew he couldn’t go and eat anything, but now the thought was on his mind…

“I want ice cream,” Nagisa mumbled to himself.

Karma stirred. “Huh?”

He tried turning over again, groaning at the effort. “Strawberries…”

The mattress shifted beside him, which Nagisa guessed was just Karma turning over, tired of his annoying pregnant omega antics. _Nagisa_ was certainly tired of it. Frustratingly, he began to feel incredibly hot, which didn’t make much sense given the winter season. He gave up in the end, deciding to just trip the clothes off, aside from his underwear. That was _significantly_ better.

Nagisa was the first to wake up in the morning, with his mandatory bladder emptying duty. Thankfully, Karma wasn’t clinging to him, so it was easy enough to remove himself without causing a disturbance. When he was done, he was tempted to go back into the warm nest and sleep again. Upon investigation, Karma had stretched out in his absence, so there wasn’t much room for him to seamlessly return.

For a guy most people were fearful, or at the very least wary, of, Karma looked peaceful in his sleep. There was none of that mischievous fire that danced across his features when he was up to no good, or the malice than sometimes set in when he was doing something seriously bad. He looked kind of harmless, actually, despite Nagisa knowing far better. Nagisa’s chest fluttered at the way he breathed lightly, chest rising and falling with steadiness, and he knew he had to turn away.

“Your dad’s a heavy sleeper, huh?” Nagisa said quietly to his stomach, as he felt Akuma roll around.  

Aside from those soft movements, he began to feel the familiar pangs of hunger. Not so hot anymore, Nagisa crept over to the nest, quickly grabbing one of the shirts to pull over his body. With his stomach in the way, there was no chance of it buttoning up, but at least the sleeves kept his arms warm.

He went down to the kitchen, hoping he’d find something there to satisfy him. For some reason, he didn’t really feel like a normal breakfast. Nothing that involved cooking, at least. He tried the fridge, nothing really catching his eye at first. Out of desperation, he moved to the freezer, though he wasn’t expecting much at all.

It was packed with stuff that definitely hadn’t been there the day before. Nagisa looked over at the shelves, which were lined with strawberry ice cream of several different brands. The sight pleased his stomach, and he eagerly reached for a brand he knew, grabbed a spoon, and let the flavour he’d been craving dance across his taste buds.

“Morning.”

The spoon fell slightly out of Nagisa’s mouth. “H-hi.” 

“Nagisa kun,” he tutted, “that’s not a healthy breakfast.”

“’S good,” he replied around the spoon.

Karma leaned against the counter nonchalantly, though a slight flush was evident on his cheeks. “You fell asleep before I could give it to you last night.”

Nagisa needed to take a moment to process that. “Last night?”

“Well yeah,” he said, “you said you wanted some, so.”

“Y-you got me ice cream in the middle of the night?”

He stood up properly. “You better appreciate it. Anyway, what do you want to do later?”

He really didn’t want to just drop the subject right then and there. How did Karma even find a place that was open in the middle of the night, on New Years no less… Nagisa couldn’t help but feel guilty. He was being a massive burden, he was sure of it. Despite that, the ice cream _did_ taste good. Now that it was there, he may as well eat some of it.

“We could go to a shrine or something,” Nagisa offered.

“ _Eh_ …” Karma paused. “I don’t really believe in that kind of thing. But I don’t mind.”

After Karma had grabbed a spoon and helped Nagisa finish the first tub of ice cream, they headed out. Nagisa was only wearing his (technically Karma’s) regular clothes. Even if he had his kimono to hand, he had serious doubts that it would have fit him still. They probably wouldn’t be the _only_ ones dressed casually, or so he hoped.

By the time they actually got to the shrine in Kunugigaoka, it wasn’t busy. Most people, Nagisa guessed, were still midway through their morning traditions. At least that meant no queuing. It wasn’t like any of the big shrines in Tokyo, but even a small town like theirs could get pretty busy.

Nagisa realised, when he actually stepped up to throw his offering coin in, that he didn’t know what to pray for. As a kid, he generally defaulted into wishing for a generally good year. _I pray that I’ll graduate,_ Nagisa thought, as he went through the ritual. _I pray that Kayano will recover soon, that Karma and I will continue to work things out, and_ , he hesitated, _that Akuma will be born safely into this world_.

Not making any kind of offering himself, Karma waited for him. As they left the premises together, passing the people who were setting up the festivities in preparation for the crowds who would surely come by later. He found himself not missing the traditions he’d always taken part in that much.

Even though he and Karma just went straight home, Nagisa decided he wouldn’t have wanted it differently. They spent the rest of the day chatting and watching the special TV programs for the day, and Nagisa _forgot_. Even if allowing himself this would come back to haunt him later, Nagisa just couldn’t bring himself to care. It was a new year after all, a fresh slate. He felt _happy_.

In bed that night, when the lights were completely turned out, Nagisa sensed Karma roll onto his side, propping himself up on his elbow.

“Say, can I ask you something?”

There was no harm. “What is it, Karma kun?”

Karma hesitated. “I was thinking… Maybe we could drop the formalities.”

“ _Why_?” It was the first thought that came to mind.

Rolling onto his back, Nagisa could tell Karma was thinking. “It’s a little weird, right? We’re going to be parents really soon, and… I think I’d rather just call you _Nagisa_. Are you okay with that?”

“Uh…” Nagisa felt his blood boil.

“I’ll just do it on my own, then,” Karma said. “G’night, Nagisa.”

It wasn’t like it would do anymore damage, Nagisa supposed.

“ _Karma_ ,” he said, letting the wisps of it float out into the darkness. Nagisa smiled, rolling over himself to bury his head into Karma’s chest. It just felt _right_.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all, full credits to @assclass-stories on Tumblr (DianaMorticai on AO3) - who you should all check out her content is great - for the idea for Karma's birthday gift! 
> 
> I hope that's enough fluff to tide you over... 
> 
> As you might have gathered, sorry guys, no civil war arc. It's not like I WANT to skip it, but... Karma beating the shit out of Nagisa when he's like 5000 months pregnant? Not gonna happen. I mean, Nagisa's already being constantly beat up by his child, so we can let him have a break. As for the kind of plot development, I've decided to just kind of leave it to your interpretation. This fic won't really touch on any of that plot (unless you want like another 20k words before we finally meet the baby - lol) - though don't worry, Karma and Nagisa will physically face off much later in this fic! 
> 
> Anywho, as always, comments and feedback mean everything to me!


	26. Detachment Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The winter break draws to a close

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nagisa's favourite river is de Nile

Nagisa found himself saying Karma’s name a lot, in the coming days. It was more than ridiculous at that point, Nagisa wasn’t even talking as a natural human. Still, every time he said it, leaving the honorific off, he felt a kind of giddiness.

“Karma, can you pass the salt?”

“No problem, Nagisa.”

Of course, Karma was doing it too. That helped, at least a little bit. Perhaps they were just as strange as each other… If that was true, he feared for whatever Akuma’s personality was going to be, if he was to buy into the whole nature vs nurture thing. For all that his pregnancy had given him as a preview, there was no doubt that his child was half Karma.

“Hey Nagisa, want to play another round on the DS after this?”

“Sure, Karma.”

A few days after New Year, the country had churned back into its regular self. Since the few days of celebration had passed, Nagisa knew his time in this small bubble with Karma was coming to a swift end. Despite a few moments of weakness, where he allowed himself to just be happy, Nagisa was beginning to snap himself out of it. It was all too good to be true, really.

Nagisa couldn’t be an ignorant little kid anymore. Through everything, he’d sacrificed that part of himself. Strangely, he wasn’t that mournful about it. At least, right then, there was no time to cry over lost childhood. It also meant that he couldn’t allow himself to get lost in fantasies. Spending a little over a week in Karma’s company, as good as it felt, was unsustainable.

“Karma, do you want to come with us to visit Kayano later?”

“I’m alright, Nagisa.”

Honestly, Nagisa didn’t know what was best for himself. There was no way this was normal. It _felt_ normal, at the time, but… It shouldn’t be, right? His head was getting all confused. They were just friends, friends who made a pretty big mistake and were trying to make the best out of it or something. Whatever his head was doing to him, working against all logic, thinking of Karma as _‘mate’_ … It needed to stop. And he wasn’t _going_ to stop, cuddling up next to him every night. At the thought of Karma’s warm arms around him, Nagisa softened, and immediately lurched.

What was _wrong_ with him?

“Are you sure you don’t want to come?” Nagisa asked once again, right before the time he had to leave. He’d arranged to meet Sugino, Kanzaki, and Okuda outside the hospital, once Kayano had recovered enough for visitors. He knew that they weren’t exactly close friends, but…

Karma shrugged. “It’s cool. You go.”

He sounded bothered by something, though Nagisa had no idea what. There was no use dwelling on it, Nagisa supposed. There was no use trying to convince Karma to do something he really didn’t want to. Perhaps it would be some good air space from each other, anyway. 

“Shoes?”

Nagisa nodded, leaning most of his weight on the railing of the staircase. If he had really wanted to, Nagisa could have suffered through the exertion of trying to put them on for himself… But he didn’t mind the help. He lifted one foot, allowing Karma (who was basically squatting) to slip the shoe on and tie the laces up. They repeated the process, almost therapeutically. After that was done, Karma wordlessly grabbed one of his coats, not going as far as to fully put it on Nagisa, but draping it over his shoulders.

After he let go of the stairs and put his arms properly into the garment, Nagisa felt the beginnings of that all too familiar twinge. Automatically, he reached out for the closest thing to cling on to, which happened to be Karma’s arm. Nagisa thought he’d become better at handling these, ever since they’d started happening. He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to focus on his breathing.

“Contraction,” he managed to bite out in explanation.

Thankfully, Karma chose not to say much, but allowed Nagisa to cling onto him, supporting his back with his hand. Until it was over, Nagisa stood like that, using Karma’s body as his only tether from the pain. It was a pretty bad one, but not as intense as that first one in class.

Finally, he breathed, coming down from it. “H-how long was that?”

“Minute and a half,” Karma answered. “Are you okay?”

Nagisa shuddered slightly, but pulled back. “Mm. I’m fine now.”

“I can come,” he said.

“I can get there fine,” Nagisa said. He didn’t want Karma to come just for Nagisa’s sake. “We still have two weeks before we really have to watch out.”

Saying it aloud, their eyes locked and widened. Saying it like that, _two weeks_ , it made Nagisa feel weird. He wasn’t due for another five, but Doctor Shirogane had made it very clear that Akuma might not actually wait that long. It still seemed so far in the distance that Nagisa hadn’t really allowed himself to _think_ about what would happen next, but in reality it wasn’t that much time at all. His appointments were about to bump up to weekly visits, even.

“See you, Karma,” he said softly, letting himself out.

“Later.”

To be honest, Nagisa was enjoying his ability to walk whilst it lasted. From everything he’d seen, it would get pretty tough from here on out. Not that he wasn’t completely exhausted by the time he made it to the train station, though. Luckily, pregnancy did have _one_ benefit. Automatically getting the good seat on the train… he was going to miss that. The first few times he’d hated it, feeling as if he was inconveniencing everyone, but now he was so uncomfortable with standing on his own two feet for so long he’d stopped caring so much.

He made it to the hospital only a little late, but his friends were already standing outside talking.

“Hey Nagisa!” Sugino said, as he approached. “How was New Years?”

Nagisa wasn’t entirely sure _how_ to describe how he’d spent the winter break. “I didn’t do that much,” he said, “but it was pretty fun.”

“Man,” he said, “I ate _so much_.”

They continued to converse casually, as they made their way inside the hospital. After briefly talking to the receptionist, they were quickly let into the room that Kayano was recovering in. Even at a glance, Nagisa could tell she looked a lot better. She was sitting up comfortably, and smiled when they walked in.

“How are you doing, Kaya-“ Nagisa stopped himself. That was right, she wasn’t actually the Kayano he’d known. “Yukimura san.”

She kept her fond smile. “You can call me ‘Kayano’. ‘Kayano Kaede’ isn’t bad at all.”

Sugino sighed, sitting down on one of the designated visitor chairs. “So much for your winter break, huh? Not to mention the holidays.”

“I’ll make it back just in time for the new term,” she said, sounding not at all bothered by her situation. This really _was_ the real her, huh? “How was your time off?”

“None of us could even bring up the subject of assassination,” Sugino said.

It was true. They’d made a LINE chat when they were planning their assassination on the southern island, to iron out some details without having to physically be together. Since then, it had retained its use for assassination planning, amongst other things. The only message Nagisa had noticed all break was somebody asking about the homework.

“I’m sorry,” Kayano looked down. “It’s all my fault. Now that I know the truth, I’ve gotten some closure, but… Now the rest of you all know about Korosensei’s past.”

“No Kayano,” Nagisa felt the need to say, “we had to find out sometime.”

“We all tried so hard not to face facts…” Okuda sighed, “so we could enjoy our fun assassinations for even just a little longer.”  

“Everyone’s probably spent the break thinking how we can face our assassination classroom from now on,” Nagisa said honestly. At the way Kayano hung onto his words, Nagisa remembered something very important. “Oh! And… I need to apologise to you Kayano. About that night. I’m sorry!” For emphasis, he bowed as best as he could. “That’s the only thing I could come up with in the heat of the moment. Are you mad?”

When she was silent for a moment, Nagisa expected the worst.“Heck no! You saved me. All I can do is thank you!”

“Thank goodness!” Nagisa breathed a sigh of relief. “If you’d said we were through…” He didn’t know what he’d do, actually. The guilt of driving one of his best friends away from him with a kiss, even if it was only to save her life, would have been horrible.

“You worry too much.” She dove under the covers. “We’ll be friends forever.”

Kanzaki stood up. “We should get going. Kayano san must be tuckered out.”

“You’re right,” Nagisa said. He didn’t want to wear Kayano out more, now she was definitely recovering. “Bye, Kayano!”

“See you in a couple of days!” Okuda added.

“Later!” Sugino called, as they left the room.

Once they were outside, Kanzaki leant against the doorframe, letting out a laugh sound that could also easily be a cough.  

“What’s up, Kanzaki san?” Nagisa felt compelled to ask.

“She’d been watching the class from somewhat of a distance, but now I feel like she’s finally joined us in the same place.”

She had a point, Nagisa realised. The others asked if he wanted to come with them to get some food with them, but he declined, therefore having the entire way back to think about things. He was really glad that Kayano was still himself. He hadn’t had much of a chance to really dig deep into what had happened. Now that he could plainly see that the Kayano he’d made friends with was still there, he didn’t mind that she’d hidden her real identity. At the end of the day, she was an assassin, just like everyone else.

Was _that_ why Karma refused to come see her? Nagisa got the feeling he had a hard time trusting people, so that would make sense… Thinking about Karma, something deep inside him lurched. Walking alone back to the train, Nagisa realised he _missed_ him. It can’t have been more than an hour or two, but Nagisa felt all wrong without Karma at his side.

That couldn’t be healthy, on any kind of level. He’d diagnosed it for himself, finally. His head was just all confused, that was all. Internally, being so close, his stupid instincts had decided to latch on. Staying in his presence would only make it worse, so Nagisa needed to leave as soon as possible, re-build the distance between them enough so that he could think of anything other than being held by Karma.

“How’s Kayano chan?” Karma asked from the kitchen, when Nagisa got back.

Nagisa bit his lip. “A lot better. She’s going to come back to school with us.” 

Nodding, he ate a spoonful of ice cream. “Well, looks like the final term’s going to be interesting.”

He really had gone overboard with the ice cream. Nagisa was never going to be able to eat the stuff again, after this. They’d managed to go through about seven of the large tubs in a few days, and that had taken _effort_. At least Karma could see the back of part of his freezer again, at least. There was that blurry, funny feeling again that threatened to swallow Nagisa whole.

“I’m okay to go back today,” Nagisa said, whilst he still had his nerve.

Karma blinked. “ _Why_?”

He swallowed. “I-I totally sprung myself on you. I’m really sorry about that,” he lowered his head, “and thank you for letting me stay here this break. B-but, it’s not right for me to take advantage of that permanently.”

“This is just as much my fault,” Karma pointed out calmly. “You don’t have to leave.”

Like static in the air, he could sense something coming from Karma. He wasn’t entirely sure what it was, it wasn’t the same clear way he could tell how his mother was feeling – that came from years of practise. Trust him to make this _hard_ for Nagisa.

“I know I don’t have to,” Nagisa tried to match his tone, to keep himself from bursting into tears or something equally ridiculous. “But I still feel like I’m imposing.”

“Nagisa-“

He _couldn’t_. “This is my choice.”

If Nagisa was ever going to look back on this conversation, he knew it would be with regret. He just didn’t have the guts, right then, to tell Karma the truth. Perhaps Karma would have understood, if he’d really let him know that he was feeling this crazy attachment, and the only way to sever it back to a manageable level was by putting their regular distance back between them. It was for the best, anyway. Karma didn’t need someone like _him_ tying him down, no more than Nagisa already was with all of this. He’d have agreed with Nagisa, if he’d told him, Nagisa was sure.

“Fine,” Karma lounged back neutrally, “whatever. Can you get your things okay?”  

Why did Nagisa feel so… disappointed? He almost wanted to take it all back, to declare that he’d changed his mind, but then he remembered he had to be firm. There was no way he could act like a child anymore. Forcing himself to grow up… that surely meant doing the things he didn’t want to do at all, because they were for the best.

Karma was so hard to read. Probably the hardest person Nagisa had come across in his short life, since he discovered his talent for it. Everything up there, in his head, came across with whirling complexity. When Nagisa could truly interpret what Karma’s intentions were for certain, it was because Karma wanted him to know. As Nagisa picked up all his things, Karma was very quiet, even when he said goodbye.

Forcing himself to take a deep breath, Nagisa made his way out into the cold. He couldn’t let himself turn around. When he reached the Asano residence, definitely absent of Asano Senior, given the lack of car (the easiest tell-tale sign of his presence), it felt almost eerie. It was as if Nagisa had somehow moved on, begun a new chapter of his existence, and was trying to force himself back a few pages.

Still, he walked up to the back door as he usually did, opened it like always, and made his way upstairs like he had so many times before. Nothing had changed, in the week and a half since he was last there.

Likely having heard the door, Asano chose the right moment to come out of his bedroom. “You’re back.”

“Mmm,” Nagisa forced himself into pleasantness. “Did you have a good break?”

He leant against the door frame. “More like weird. Your class didn’t _do_ anything to my father, right?”

Technically, they _had_ , when he tried and failed to knock down their class and faced off against Korosensei. Nagisa hadn’t immediately noticed that large of a change in his personality, right off the bat. Then again, Nagisa didn’t know enough to get a full measure of it, unlike his son would have.

“Nothing out of the ordinary,” Nagisa replied. Technically, it was the truth.

“He got me a _birthday card_ ,” he wrinkled his nose.

Wait. “It was your birthday?”

Asano rolled his eyes. “Yeah, the first.”

That was the final straw, apparently. Tears formed at the corners of Nagisa’s eyes, spilling out at steady rates. He didn’t know why that had done him in, but there was definitely guilt. After all, Asano had really saved his ass, even if it was for less than honourable purposes. Deep down, he was lightly aware that this was probably also his hormones playing up, at least.

“I’m s-sorry I didn’t know,” Nagisa managed to get out. “Y-you were so nice to me on my birthday, a-and you took me out, and I didn’t even _know_ about yours.”

Blinking slowly, Asano looked over Nagisa much like he looked at homework. “I’m not that bothered by birthdays. So what, you lived another year? It’s not that much of an achievement.”

“ _But_ ,” he felt so awful. Nagisa forced himself to take a breath. “I’ll make it up to you! Like an IOU.”

“I don’t need-“ Asano stopped. “An IOU? Something I can cash in, whenever I want? That’s an _interesting_ proposition, Nagisa kun.”

Nagisa was beginning to hate the ideas produced by his stupid brain. “W-within reason. I’m really sorry,” he repeated, again. “Uhm, happy late birthday.”

“Sure,” he said, “I forgive you.”

That made him feel a little better, at least. He excused himself, returning to the same blank canvas of a room that had somehow felt like his own in the last few months. It didn’t smell at _all_ like Karma. There was no warmth, no ultimate comfort that had left him the most at ease he had been in his memory. This was for the _best_. Nagisa went over to the bed, forcing himself to lie and try to relax on it.

Giving up on that plan, he opened the draw from the bedside table, pulling out the notebook, and the knife he’d hidden underneath it. He flicked through it, the list of Korosensei’s weaknesses all written out before his eyes. It was time to focus.

Taking a pen, he did some quick maths, and wrote it out.

**Days until assassination: sixty four.**

**Days until birth: forty three – approx.**

The final term was about to begin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What, you thought I'd let them actually stay happy? For more than a chapter at a time? Fools. 
> 
> In other news, this chapter is more of a 'wrapping things up'. I promise, we're on the homestretch now. Not for the fic in its entirety, not at all, but for you know what ;) 
> 
> As always, I love and appreciate all comments and feedback!


	27. Valentines Day Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a pretty uneventful month, Valentines Day roles around.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *writes chapter from Karma's POV to confirm that yes, he did indeed have a boner in chapter 25*

“U-uhm,” Okuda stood in front of him, holding out a box, “the chocolates you asked for, Karma kun.”

Karma considered them, and took the sealed box. She’d gone to the extra effort of wrapping them up all nice and cute… perfect. This was going to work out great, Karma was sure. It had been a simple request, he was sure, just chocolates laced with a little cyanide. He was going to hide them in Terasaka’s shoe hole later, to see what would happen. It wouldn’t _really_ hurt him, probably. The flavour of cyanide was too strong to miss, anyway, he’d likely spit the chocolates straight out.

“Thanks, Okuda san,” he pocketed the chocolates.

 _What_? Karma only had a few days left to have any real fun, he was just making the most of it whilst he still could.

Speaking of fun… Karma noticed Nakamura sauntering over. “Something for _me_?” He joked, though plainly she had no chocolates in hand.

Naturally, she ignored him. “Look over at Kayano chan.” Sure enough, the girl was trembling, badly hiding what looked like a box of her own chocolates underneath the desk. “I’d say she has the hots for Nagisa.”

Karma felt himself stiffen. “What makes you think that?”

“This _special_ image, for one,” Nakamura pulled out her phone, displaying the clear picture of Nagisa kissing Kayano. “Wanna torture her a little?”

He considered his options. Going along with Nakamura would definitely be the easiest, the most expected course of action for someone like him. It was good cover for his real feelings, so he nodded, and begun to approach Kayano’s desk with her.

“What do we have _here_?” Karma questioned, making her jump from behind.

“And who are those for, hmm?” Nakamura followed.

She blushed heavily. “Wh-what do you mean? It’s just a formality! Th-they could be for anybody!”

“Oh?” Karma motioned for Nakamura to pass him her phone, which still had the picture on the display. “And here I was _sure_ you were giving them to this guy here.”

Kayano’s entire form crumbled. “Forgive me! Please forgive me!”

He wasn’t really sure what her deal was, or who she was addressing that to. It was pretty clear she had developed a crush on Nagisa. He wasn’t sure how long for, probably hiding her true feelings with those genius acting skills, but that had stopped after that kiss. Now… She was practically cowering in them.

Karma would be lying to himself if he didn’t acknowledge that he, too, had been destroyed by Nagisa’s kiss. Like his own personal poison. It had been a lot deeper than that, but it was still the catalyst. He wondered if he’d ever be fortunate enough to feel it again, though the thought also scared him. At first, he’d felt a kind of madness rush over him that night Nagisa had kissed Kayano. It was like being stabbed in the gut repeatedly, every hit a reminder of what he wasn’t allowed.

And then Nagisa had spent the winter break with him. It was odd, when they’d first been friends, Karma had enjoyed Nagisa’s company because he was just a harmless little mouse. And now he knew better, knew that Nagisa could kill him in his sleep, letting his guard down wasn’t scary, it was _thrilling_. Karma had never felt that kind of desire to be close with anybody, but Nagisa… Nagisa rewrote all the rules for him with his mere existence.

 “Let’s continue this discussion,” Karma’s eyes darted around the classroom. “I know where.”

Leading the way, they went outside, to one of Karasuma’s favourite areas to drill them. It wasn’t far from the main path towards the class building, where the trees were tall but pretty easy to climb. Due to a great variation in branch height, some of the higher ones were masked by the branches below. Right at the start of the school year, Karma had pegged it as an excellent vantage position.

He scratched the back of his head. “You don’t want Nagisa to hear this, right? He can barely walk right now, let alone scale a tree.”

There weren’t any arguments to that, at least, and they began to climb up. It really was true, watching Nagisa attempt to move anywhere at speed greater than that of a small turtle was kind of… entertaining. At his last appointment a few days ago, the doctor said it was because Akuma was facing head down now, and would be staying like that. He wasn’t sure how happy Nagisa had been about that development, though he _had_ pointed out it was better than when Akuma was constantly practising their summersaults.

“So,” Nakamura said, when they’d reached the intended branch, “spill it.”

Kayano trembled again, and practically collapsed into the bark. “I-isn’t it perverted? Nagisa’s an o-omega, and-“

“I don’t see the big deal,” Karma found himself saying. “People just like who they like, right?”

“I guess…” She faced him properly, face crimson. “You’re _okay_ with it?”

If that didn’t feel like a hard punch the gut… If Karma were honest, he _wasn’t_ okay with it. Though he wasn’t particularly happy about Kayano lying to them for almost a full year, he had to respect the nerve she had as an assassin. Kayano _herself_ wasn’t the problem. It was just, he wanted Nagisa to be his, not somebody else’s. But Karma knew now, he’d promised, he didn’t have any right to claim that.

He sighed. “Why would I care what Nagisa does in his spare time?”

“B-but-“

“Yeah,” Karma said, “our kid’s not calling you Mama. So, now that’s settled.”

Kayano’s flush remained. “I don’t know where to start! I’ve acted love _tons_ of times and studied it and stuff but I have no real life experience liking a classmate! Like, what expression should I make when I give him the chocolates?”

If Karma really knew the answer to that, he’d be taking Nagisa out to dinner already.

“Say,” Nakamura cut in, “Isogai and Kataoka are below us. Let’s study them.”

They watched the interaction from above like some kind of drama, with Kataoka handing Isogai a giant selection of different kinds of chocolate. They made a pretty good pairing, really. As class representatives, it was only natural that they’d grown close together. Kayano seemed to be hanging onto every word, so at least she was taking this seriously.

Nakamura yawned. “I saw Kanzaki give chocolates to Sugino earlier. He _flipped_.”

Karma thought about it. “Hayami gave Chiba some chocolate bullets next to the target range on our way over here.”

“See?” Nakamura said. “Everyone has their own whys and hows for this.”

That was pretty sound advice, Karma guessed. He could go off that. “Shouldn’t you just say what you want to say in your own way?”

“Yeah,” Kayano agreed. “Thanks, you two. Looks like he’s over there.”

Following the direction of her eyes, Karma too saw the small figure resting against a much smaller tree, his cerulean hair unmistakable. He rolled his eyes. “Well, I’m gonna go help him out. He has no chance standing up again on his own.”

His heart rate started to rise, when he leapt out of the tree, but not from fear of falling. In truth, he’d been thinking about telling Nagisa everything. It wasn’t like Kayano had _dibs_ or anything, Nagisa’s heart was still fair game. There wasn’t going to be a better time, Karma thought. Though, it wasn’t as if he had chocolates or anything, mostly because he _wasn’t_ a twelve year old girl.

Maybe he could ask him out. It’s not like it would make much of a difference, they went out together all the time. Would it really change things that much if Kama called it a ‘date’ rather than ‘hanging out’? It was just the matter of wording, really. Trying to ignore the tell-tale tingle of heat rising in his cheeks, Karma pictured it. _Nagisa, let’s go on a date._

It wasn’t as if they’d be doing more than the usually did, anyway. Maybe it would be nice to kiss him or something, but he didn’t need to. Mostly, Karma realised his feelings for Nagisa were surprisingly innocent. Sure, there had been a few times… Karma was certainly attracted to him, and being in such close quarters to Nagisa a little over a month ago, well, his body had reacted. Thankfully, he was sure Nagisa was too innocent to notice.

And then there was New Years morning, where Nagisa had woken up first. Karma found him eating ice cream in the kitchen, wearing one of his own shirts. The sleeves were comically long on his arms, but that meant the extra fabric was tantalizing. Aside from the shirt, the only other thing he’d been wearing was underwear. _Tight_ underwear. Part of his ass and thighs had been covered by the length of the shirt, but he could see that creamy skin he had weird urges to bite into. He’d had to actually bite his own hand to supress himself, when Nagisa started practically sucking the ice cream from the spoon.

So maybe his feelings were a _tiny_ bit sexual.

“Yo,” Karma collected himself to say, when he reached the spot Nagisa was resting.

Nagisa blinked slowly through thick eyelashes. “Oh, hey Karma. I didn’t mean to fall asleep.”

Of course he didn’t. Karma decided to drop to his level, sitting down beside him. “What were you doing?”

He stretched his arms. “The ground’s more comfy than the school desks,” he yawned. “I was gonna eat chocolate.”

Sure enough, there was a large pile next to his thigh. “Wow Nagisa, I didn’t realise you were such a _womanizer_.”

“It’s not like that!” Nagisa protested. “They weren’t giving them to me _romantically_.”

Whilst that was probably true, Karma wouldn’t put it past Nagisa to just not notice at all if the intention was romance. If Karma was going to do this, right now, he had to be really direct. Plainly saying ‘I like you’… Nagisa would just assume he meant as friends. But what if it went wrong? Karma couldn’t say anything too incriminating, in case he needed to backtrack at any point.

Before he could say anything, Nagisa had a finger to his throat, soothing his pulse point. After the initial jolt of fear, Karma did find himself relaxing, concentration returning to normal.

“Karma?” Nagisa tilted his head an asked innocently. “What’s wrong? Your wave of consciousness was all over the place.”

At the last hurdle, Nagisa’s soft yet worn out smile, Karma hesitated. Somebody like Nagisa… deserved so much better than him. Karma had already screwed him up for life as it was, and though he liked messing with Nagisa a little, he still wanted the best for him. Maybe _that_ was love, rather than admiration for his talent and appearance. Karma lived to see him squirm, but… real happiness was better in general. Somebody like Kayano could make Nagisa happier than _he_ could even try to. That was right. No matter what, Karma couldn’t let his true feelings slip.

“I’m hungry,” Karma announced, desperately trying to change the subject. He reached over Nagisa’s body.

Nagisa lightly bat his hand away. “Mine.”

Karma rolled his eyes. “I’ll bet you for them.”

Keeping up his smile, Nagisa ate a chocolate from one of the boxes he’d already opened. “What kind of bet?”

“How about,” he thought, “if I can balance all the boxes on your stomach, I get to keep one.”

“All of them?” Nagisa said, a little weakly. He said a lot of things like that, recently.

Karma swallowed, deciding to concentrate on this. “Sure.”

He picked the largest, and flattest box out of the pile to make the best base. Nagisa’s stomach was incredibly curved, but physically it had the least chance of wobbling and knocking the rest down. Nagisa just watched him as he evaluated it like a real problem. He didn’t even like chocolate that much… But a bet was a bet, even if he’d initiated it. The tower got to quite an impressive height, actually, to the point where there was only one was remaining. Biting his lip to concentrate, he was just about to balance it, when there was a sudden, clear foot shaped emergence from Nagisa’s stomach, unbalancing the tower so it toppled.

Nagisa couldn’t hold his laughter back. “I guess you lose.”

For a moment, Karma was speechless. Betrayed by his own child… And at the very last second, too.

“You might want to stay in there,” he warned, speaking directly to Nagisa’s bump. “If you decide to come out right now I might have a bone to pick.”

This was all he needed.

* * *

“Rio chan,” Kaede looked down at the interaction between Nagisa and Karma, “d-do you see it?”

The other girl shrugged. “Depends what you mean.”

Kaede was sure she was right about this. “It’s just, they look like a family.”

It was all she could see, unless she was being somehow deceived. From their position, she couldn’t make out the conversation entirely, though she gathered they were playing some kind of game, but that had died down. It felt intrusive to watch them, to be honest. Nagisa was resting his head on Karma’s shoulder, and Karma was touching his baby bump with uncharacteristic softness.

In just a few days, as Nagisa had told her, they could have a baby. They were going to be _parents._

“Hmm,” Rio said, otherwise silent.

She watched Karma flip himself onto his feet, bending down to offer both hands for support, practically pulling back up. It wasn’t even really competition. The two had something between them, this _bond_ , that Kaede couldn’t replicate even if she wanted to. And she _didn’t_ want to. Though despite the circumstances, she still _liked_ him… getting in the way of something like that...

It was a good thing Kaede was an actress. She’d played a character all year, she could do it again. This time, she’d take on the role of Nagisa’s friend. She’d still give him the chocolates, platonically, and wish him good luck for everything in the future. Then she’d stand back, try and move on as Nagisa did with his own life.

She even found herself smiling lightly. Karma and Nagisa weren’t as good as acting as they probably thought they were. If they were planning to continue pretending to be plain friends, then _well_ , it was a ticking time bomb before someone discovered the truth. Before graduation, if she had to make a guess. But, she’d keep that a secret. _Boys,_ they really could be clueless.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They're both idiots. 
> 
> Time till D Day: 4 days *whistles*
> 
> As always, I love all comments! Until next time!


	28. Due Date Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally, the 18th of February rolls around

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *side eyes*

With all things considered, Nagisa wasn’t sure how to feel about it being his due date. The last month and a half had been pretty uneventful, filled with a few reluctant assassination attempts. Nagisa was just too tired and uncomfortable to think about much, just quietly nodding along in class as if he wasn’t suffering. Still, there was a light buzz under his skin. Tomorrow, he might finally have met his baby.

For the last couple of weeks, everything even slightly out of the usual had been met with tension. Nagisa wasn’t blind, he could feel the way Karma’s eyes fell on him if he so much as shifted weirdly. He didn’t think it was going to be that dramatic, but it felt nice to not be alone in the nervousness. It was February the eighteenth, the day he’d had marked ever since that first real doctor’s appointment.

Maybe he could attempt to ‘enjoy’ the last day. He had a love/hate relationship with Akuma’s kicking. On the downside, it was kind of annoying, even hurting now they were a lot stronger, but… It was kind of sad to think he wouldn’t feel it again, in a way. Still, for the last nine months, his body hadn’t been his own. It would be nice to have it back, though Nagisa wasn’t sure if he even remembered what that was _like_.

Of course, he noticed the way everyone was looking at him. Nagisa hoped it wouldn’t happen right there and then, at least. God, that would be _embarrassing_. Still, the day had to go on as planned. During third period, after basically being on the edge of his seat for most of the day, Nagisa begun to feel the ever familiar twinge. Though he’d learnt how to cope with his false contractions well enough, he couldn’t help but freak out just a little.

He tried his best to breathe through it, clutching the desk as his eyes squeezed shut. Causing a scene was the last thing he wanted, which thankfully didn’t seem to have happened. The contraction was over in around a minute, he suspected, though it was hard to tell. His heart started beating faster than usual, once he’d come down from it. This _could_ be the start. Nagisa’s eyes were locked on the clock. Unfortunately, that meant that time seemed to move excruciatingly slowly.

The lessons bled into each other, broke up for lunch, and started up again without another contraction in sight. Nagisa felt a little defeated, when even by the end of the school day he hadn’t felt another one. That didn’t mean it _wouldn’t_ happen, he tried to force himself to remember. They weren’t through the entire day yet.

“You okay, Nagisa?” Sugino thought to ask, when they were dismissed from class.

Trying and failing to catch up with a normal walking pace, Nagisa nodded. “I just want them out,” he admitted.

“You know,” Maehara said casually, “if it’s a boy you should call it Hiroto.”

“No way,” Nakamura cut in. “It’s _clearly_ a girl, and Rio is a great name.”

Karma looked over at her. “Yeah sure, in your dreams.”

“Why not just stick with Akuma,” Hazama suggested, because of course _she_ would.

Walking anywhere felt akin to trying to carry a watermelon between his legs, but thankfully they weren’t going too fast. _Only one more day_ , Nagisa told himself. It felt impossibly short and long at the same time. In one sense, the idea of it only being mere hours now was terrifying, in the grand scheme of things such a tiny amount of time. But it still felt so far off, like it was still going to be months, an abstract idea of a child that would come _eventually_.

Once they’d eventually reached the bottom of the mountain, everyone said their goodbyes for the day, though he sensed the way they all seemed to glance over their shoulders at him. It felt like quite a bit of pressure on him and his womb, actually.

Karma lingered. “Are you-“

“I’m not going to give birth in the next ten minutes,” Nagisa said. “I’ll, uhm,” he thought, “I’ll text you, if anything happens.”

It didn’t turn out to be necessary. No matter how much he paced around the bedroom, lay in a variety of positions, and twirled his thumbs, nothing was happening. In the end he decided to at least try and get some sleep, he was exhausted anyway, and it would kill some time. Unfortunately, when he woke up again, it was the morning, and he was still pregnant. And then the day came and went, and then it was the _next_.

Nagisa had heard stories about people going all the way up to forty two weeks, which made him want to cry in despair. On the twentieth of February, he was only two days over, and with every second that passed, he felt more and more overdue. At this point, Nagisa was half tempted to stick his hand up there and pull the damn baby out himself. That probably wouldn’t be the safest way to do it, though.

It didn’t help that Karma was treating him like an invalid. Nagisa _felt_ like one, for sure, but that didn’t mean he needed _reminding_. If he was completely honest with himself, he probably wouldn’t have been able to walk as effectively without Karma helping to hold him up, but he didn’t have to be _happy_ about that. Thanks to the days bleeding over, he was having to go through another doctor’s appointment.

Doctor Shirogane looked at him sympathetically, as he was practically carried into her examination room. “How are you doing, Nagisa kun? Feeling some strain, probably?”

Nagisa nodded weakly, attempting to get himself comfortable on the examination chair. He was well aware of the procedure, at that point. He answered the mandatory questions about his health, lifted his shirt so she could feel for whatever she needed to on his stomach, and sighed when she brought the ultrasound wand out, and Akuma’s image filled the screen.

“Heartbeat is 132bpm,” she noted, “nicely in the average range. Alright, time for the internal examination. Karma kun,” she gestured.

Karma’s grip on Nagisa’s shoulder (he hadn’t even registered him putting it there) tightened. “No,” he practically growled, in a voice that was uncharacteristically serious for him.

Doctor Shirogane kept her features neutral. “It’s no different from every other appointment,” she explained, “I promise it won’t hurt Nagisa kun.”

His fingers only seemed to clench tighter. Nagisa swallowed, the pheromones coming from Karma detectable despite the neutralised examination room. Though he usually loved Karma’s protective scent, this wasn’t something warm that smelt like home, but with an edge of ice, threatening.

“I don’t mind if he stays,” Nagisa said, to keep the peace. He didn’t need Karma getting himself thrown out.

She just smiled. “If you’re sure. Don’t worry about it,” she looked directly at Karma, “if anything this is a good sign. They say alphas and their babies are like dogs and earthquakes. It shouldn’t be long now at all.” 

Nagisa cringed as he usually did when she went ahead to check whatever she needed to. It wasn’t exactly painful, just highly uncomfortable. Not just physically, but also the fact that she had her fingers inside him… Nagisa just had to remember she was doing her job. This was for Akuma’s sake, after all. It felt slightly better than the other times, somehow, with Karma’s hand tethering him.

“Alright,” she announced, “you’re actually 90% effaced, and about 3cm dilated.”

He almost lurched up. “I _am_?”

“Honestly,” she removed her gloves and sat at her desk, “it could be a matter of hours. It could also be days from now. Some babies just like to take their time, that’s all. If labour doesn’t begin naturally on its own for another week,” she paused, “we’ll have to think about a medical induction, but I’m hoping that won’t be the case. In the meantime, there are a few things you can do to try and help things along. Light exercise such as walking, for example, eating spicy food, sex,” Karma’s hand fell from Nagisa’s shoulder like it was molten lava, “primrose oil. Anyway, hopefully, the next time we see each other, you’ll be in the delivery room, yes?”

“Yeah,” Nagisa said, though he didn’t feel so sure.

“So,” Karma said, once they were out of the clinic, “want to walk back to my place?”

That sounded… exhausting. “What for?” He asked. Nagisa didn’t mean to sound like he was being short, but

“She said walking would help, right?”

Nagisa strongly suspected there was an ulterior motive there. There was a certain edge to Karma, though he was obviously trying to keep it covered up. Well, it wasn’t like Nagisa had much better to do. If Karma wanted to keep his eye on Nagisa for a few hours, which he so clearly wasn’t hiding well, Nagisa didn’t have a problem with it.

Ordinarily, it would have only been twenty minutes to Karma’s house, but with his own personal bowling ball attached, it felt like a small eternity. Still, it seemed Karma had a good judge of his limits, stepping just fast enough that Nagisa was pushing himself, but not so quick that he was completely overexerted.

“Can we take a break?” Nagisa eventually had to ask, lightly panting for breath.

They rested against a wall, in the end, as Nagisa recovered from so much movement. Yeah, he needed the baby out of him as soon as possible. They were leaning opposite one of the local primary schools, he noticed. Nagisa turned his head towards Karma, who was silently studying the building.

“Hey, Karma?”

“Hmm?”

Nagisa chewed his lip. “Have you decided where you’re going for high school yet?”

He shoved his hands in his coat pockets. “I’m just staying at Kunugigaoka.”

That was… odd. “How come?” Nagisa couldn’t help but ask. “You could get into any school you wanted to.”

“That’s probably true,” he said, standing up, apparently satisfied that their rest time was up. “But I don’t think I’d work as had,” he shrugged. “Kungigaoka has _competition_. You?”

Nagisa wasn’t sure he liked the sound of that. “I just put my mum’s choice Keisetsu down,” he admitted, “I was going to change it but… I couldn’t think of anything better.” The entrance exams were in only a few days. Akuma had better get out before that, otherwise he’d be screwed.

“Are you cold?”

He hadn’t noticed, with everything else bothering him, but he was shivering. “A little,” he said, looking up at the white clouds covering the sky. “I think it’s gonna snow.”

Karma slipped his long black coat off before Nagisa could protest, and wrapped it around his shoulders. Admittedly, the warmth, and Karma’s freshly worn scent, was kind of nice.

“Aren’t _you_ going to get cold?” Nagisa said, feeling a little bad.

He half chuckled. “I’m not the one who’s like a million months pregnant.”

Thankfully, Karma’s house wasn’t far from there. It was still a form of torture in getting there, but Nagisa had never been gladder to see it. For one, it was incredibly warm, the kind that was just comforting, causing his body to go all sluggish. As if his eyes were zeroing in on a target, Nagisa went straight over to the sofa, easily the most comfortable place in the whole house. He sighed, shifting so he melted into the cushions.

“I have an idea,” Karma flopped back beside him. “I’ll cook you curry.”

“Curry?” Nagisa blinked back his exhaustion. “Hmmm.”

He grinned. “Not just any curry. The _spiciest_ curry.” 

Nagisa sighed. “I don’t think that’ll actually work.”

“So?” He jumped up again, and Nagisa wanted to slap him, jealous of all that energy. “You’re hungry, right.”

“Me and Akuma both.” He was _always_ hungry.

“Here,” Karma picked up one of the woven blankets up from the side table. “You stay right there.”

Nagisa meant to reply, but the warm blanket made him increasingly drowsy. It helped that it smelt inherently like Karma. Not the natural alpha scent he produced, but that of the foreign incense that often clung to him. Without caring to feel guilty about it, Nagisa lifted the corner of it up to his nose and inhaled deeply.

He must have fallen asleep like that, because the next thing he knew, his eyes were watering, and there was a weird crick in his next.

“Dinner’s ready!” Karma announced, proudly presenting his dish.

Nagisa rubbed his eyes. “Thanks for dinner. What’s _in_ that?”

“Half my spice collection,” he said casually, pulling up the coffee table to put the plate on. “I chose the ones that combine well too, though.”

Tentatively, Nagisa took a hold of the spoon, and tried a bit. The curry was alright for a moment, even on the edge of tasting _really_ good, before the spices his the back of his throat. Almost instantly, his throat went tight and his eyes seriously began to water. By the millisecond, it was getting worse. His tongue felt completely numb, face heating up as he spluttered.

“Karma!” He complained. “Water!”

“Right,” Karma rushed off, producing a bottle.

Nagisa practically snatched it off him, pouring almost half of it directly into his mouth. “ _What_ spices?!”

“I threw in some ghost peppers,” he said, as casually as he was talking about a clove of garlic or something. “Eat up.”

“But-“

“You’re miserable.”

“And _this_ is going to help?!” He considered it. If this plate of pure hell ended his suffering, it was probably worth it. Cursing mentally, he got it over with, practically shovelling the food down his throat, crying as he did so. When the plate was finally clear, Nagisa had downed three bottles of water.

Karma looked at him cautiously. “How do you feel?”

“Like I need the bathroom,” Nagisa choked.

He perked up. “Because your water’s gonna break?!”

“No,” Nagisa said, frustrated. “Because your baby is using my bladder as a plushie toy and I just filled it up.”

Once he’d peed for the twentieth time that day, and the spiciness had begun to wear off, Nagisa returned, still no sign of anything contraction like.

“Did it work?”

“Am I screaming yet?” Nagisa groaned. “Of course it had to take after you, lazy and late for everything.”

Karma shrugged, and draped the blanket back around Nagisa’s shoulders. “Maybe they’re just comfy.”

Nagisa squeezed his eyes closed, feeling a die down in movement. “ _Great_. I think Akuma’s napping.” He looked down at his stomach. “Just get out of me already!”

“Doctor Shirogane said to let it happen naturally.”

He snapped his head around. “Yeah, well, Doctor Shirogane says-“ Nagisa stopped whatever comment he was about to bite out, and thought about it. He’d do literally anything to get Akuma out of him, right then. “Karma, you know what else she suggested…”

Like Nagisa had just punched him or something, he shuffled away awkwardly. “Uh, that’s, uhm-“

Nagisa, who had magically seemed to regain energy, was quicker, practically crawling over to him. This, he decided, was a great idea. The ends completely justified the means. “Don’t you want to get this over with?”

“Nagisa!” He backed up further, until he ran out of space on the sofa. “You’re just frustrated.”

“Exactly!” Nagisa countered. “It doesn’t have to be for long.”

“That’s not the problem!”

“Then what _is_?” Nagisa tilted his head. It was as if a demon really had taken over his body, with one goal in mind. Now, how to get Karma on board? Shamefully, he thought back to some of Bitch Sensei’s lessons. “Don’t you want me?”

“Also not the problem!” He flushed.

“But _Karma_ ,” he grabbed onto Karma’s shirt. “You want to meet our baby, right? Just a little bit of sex,” Nagisa paused. Maybe it was time to bring out the big guns. “Just a little, and your omega won’t be in so much pain anymore.”

“I-” he paused, “fine. Uh…” he looked at Nagisa like a math problem. “Lie back, maybe?”

Nagisa just didn’t care anymore. He wanted to not be pregnant, by any means necessary. To be honest, he’d probably live to regret this, but… Well, they’d done it once before. That was the source of this mess, anyway. It wasn’t like he could get _more_ pregnant. He did as Karma said, leaving his personal space to lie as flat as he comfortably could, letting his legs part.

Karma followed his momentum, but braced himself awkwardly, eyes raking down his body. “I… Is there enough room?”

Hanging onto that, Nagisa felt his brain zero in on that. He sat back up again. “So that’s it? You think I’m _fat_.”

“That’s not what I said-”  

It was too late, though. All of the hormones had been building, and Nagisa couldn’t help but release them all in one pathetic sob. He already felt disgusting enough, wanting nothing more than to just curl into a ball and hide until it was all over.

“I get it,” he said, in-between pained crying sounds. “I’m gross, and sweaty, and disgusting.”

“I meant logistically,” Karma awkwardly put a hand on his shoulder, as if to comfort him.

Nagisa buried his head in his arm anyway. “I’m sorry.”

He was more than aware he was acting crazy. Karma just let him cry on him, without saying much. In fairness, Nagisa couldn’t blame him. It was probably what he needed, anyway, to just cry the stress out until he felt better. Despite the nap, his emotions were taking their toll on him. He was so _tired_ , but the fight was leaving him. Nagisa decided he didn’t mind anymore, Akuma would come when he or she wanted to.

“I’m gonna go,” Nagisa said after a while of sitting in silence.

Karma stood up first, helping to pull Nagisa to his feet. He was definitely looking forward to being less dependent on others, for sure. “I’ll walk you to the station,” he said, voice a little strained. It wasn’t a request.

They made it there, at a pretty slow and steady pace, just in time for the train. It was a silent walk, but then again there was nothing really to be said. Most of what Nagisa had been feeling had been spelled out through his tears. But then, as they walked through the entrance, Nagisa begun to think that maybe the silence wasn’t enough.

“Karma,” he begun, but once he had his attention, the right words escaped Nagisa’s lips. What he really wanted to say was thanks for putting up with him, for (mostly) not running away and leaving him to deal this all alone, for taking care of him. But he wasn’t sure how to convey it. “I’m sorry for getting your shirt wet,” he said.

“Oh, this?” Karma looked at his still damp sleeve. “It’s cool, I’m sure I’ll get worse.”

Nagisa swallowed. “Bye, then,” he said quietly.

By the time he got back to Asano’s, he was completely tuckered out. He didn’t bother to announce his return or anything, instead going straight for the bedroom. After stripping his clothes into the most comfy things he had, one of Karma’s jumpers (which he’d stretched beyond recognition but still kind of fit him) and a pair of sweat pants, he attempted to make himself comfortable.

The exhaustion won out on whatever party Akuma had decided to throw in his stomach that evening. Maybe they were tired of being stuck inside him too. He seized slightly at one movement which was particularly painful. It seemed like they were trying to _punch_ their way out of him. Yeah, Akuma was definitely going to turn out like Karma. It was a nice thought though, somehow. Nagisa’s eyes managed to slip closed.

His body had other plans, though. The next thing he knew, his body was gripped in the middle of a forceful contraction. It was lower down than the others he’d grown to know and hate, creating an intense amount of pressure. He winced his way through it, body slumping when it ended. After he re-caught his breath, Nagisa looked at his phone. He must have been asleep for a few hours, given the time it read, rather than the few minutes it felt like.

Groaning, Nagisa attempted to get comfy again, some real rest the only thing he wanted right then and there. He was too emotionally tired to get excited about another false contraction. However, once again, it felt like the moment he closed his eyes, his body was overtaken again. Nagisa forced himself into a sitting position with the shock of it, just as painful as the last. It didn’t last that long, though, thankfully.

Akuma protested, a visible ripple going across his stomach as they moved. Feeling a slight twinge of nerves, Nagisa looked at the clock on his phone once again, and his heart practically leapt out his throat _. It had only been around fifteen minutes_. He tried to force himself to remain calm. This could mean anything. His body could just be playing a cruel trick on him. Fingers shaking, Nagisa opened up the timer, and just watched the seconds unbearably add up.

Exactly fourteen minutes and twenty three seconds after the last one, it was like a full body surge. It definitely felt difference to the false ones, still painful, but in a different way. Once it was through, Nagisa’s body couldn’t relax again. It had to be _really_ happening. He almost wanted to laugh, and to cry, and to throw up from the anticipation.

And then Nagisa realised he didn’t know what to do next. He’d somewhat assumed that it would happen dramatically or something, and he’d be whisked straight away to the hospital, not alone on a quiet evening. Maybe it was some instinctual thing, or just Nagisa’s own self knowing he couldn’t handle this, but he moved to stand and allowed his feet to carry him across the hallway.

He knocked lightly at first, but when that garnered no result, he pounded the door with the force of his entire body. Eventually he almost fell into it, when Asano finally pulled it open. It didn’t look like he’d been asleep or anything, but he was definitely ready for bed. Nagisa gulped, noticing the unimpressed stare Asano gave him as he raised his eyebrows.

“Uhm,” Nagisa said, already under clear scrutiny. “I’m really sorry about bothering you, but, I think the baby’s coming.”

His eyes widened for a second, before his hands were on Nagisa’s shoulders, walking him backwards. “If you get _any_ kind of fluid on my carpet,” he warned, “I’ll make you scrub it out. Come on,” he ordered, “bathroom.”

Nagisa just did what he said, instruction a big comfort. Going back through the bedroom into the attached bathroom, Nagisa saw his point. Though the house was pretty western in design, the floor of the bathroom was like any other Japanese shower room. Any spilled fluids would be pretty easily washed away with the showerhead. Nagisa wasn’t sure how to feel about that being Asano’s first priority, but he was in no place to complain.

“S-shouldn’t I go to a hospital?” Nagisa asked, leaning against the sink to support his weight.

Like it was just a fact, Asano sighed. “They’ll probably just send you away if it’s too early. Do you know how far apart the contractions are?”

Thinking Asano would probably make a good doctor (it wouldn’t be a stretch to say he’d be good at anything) if he wanted to, Nagisa tried to think. “Fourteen and a half minutes, last time I checked,” he said.

“Okay,” he said calmly, holding Nagisa’s eye contact. “I’ll time the next few for you,” he paused, “you’re never telling anybody about this. Clear?”

“Sure,” Nagisa said. It was good Asano knew so much about everything. Leaning against the sink definitely felt a lot better than lying on the bed, at least. Asano went to sit there, leaving Nagisa alone in the bathroom. The door was open, though, so he was still in his line of sight. The feeling washed over him again, and Nagisa’s fingers clenched to the sink like a buoyancy aid.

“It’s over,” he exhaled, after it ended.

Asano clicked something. “That’s the starting point.”

Starting point? Nagisa wanted it to be the ending point already, and it hadn’t even been an hour yet. Well, an hour since he was aware of it, at least. Between that contraction and the next, he tried to let his mind send him elsewhere, to focus on something good rather than a sudden sense of dread. It really was going to hurt, wasn’t it? Nagisa was sure he could handle it, but then the next contraction arrived. He struggled to keep himself upright, letting out an involuntary whimper of pain. The false contractions had _nothing_ on this.

“Fourteen minutes and two seconds,” Asano’s voice came.

Nagisa wasn’t sure if that caused him relief or not. The fact that they were speeding up surely had to be good, right? Naturally, he found it was better to stick his hips out and sway them slightly. The next two contractions were only a little closer together, but the pain was ramping up. He begun to lose all sense of time, just working through them.

He was pretty sure he was at thirteen minutes and something, or maybe it was twelve? Nagisa gasped as another one hit, like dunking his lower half into a sea of knives. It seemed to last a little linger too, and Nagisa’s eyes were squeezed so tightly he wondered if they might end up imbedded in the back of his skull.

When it finally went, he fully slumped, though he was unwilling to let go of the sink. Somehow, it was like a security, freezing him in time. No more than a minute later, another sensation rolled through him. For a second, he thought he’d blacked out between contractions, but it wasn’t _pain_. It was more like a weird pop, and then suddenly warm fluid rushing down his thighs.

It couldn’t be anything _else_. Nagisa’s eyes raked down. The sweat pants he was wearing were soaked through, and there was definitely a lot of clear fluid on the floor. He tried his level best not to hyperventilate. The contractions had been temporary pain, but _that_ , that made this incredibly real. It was happening.

“I’ll get Toboso to get the car ready, okay?” Asano said, the scene making it very obvious what had happened.

“O-okay,” Nagisa got out.

Finally, it was time. He was going to have a baby. As if that wasn’t enough, Akuma kicked him, probably in complaint at the absence of their nice, comfortable fluid. Nagisa let go of the sink with one hand, ribbing it soothingly on his stomach. Weirdly, at least right then, he didn’t feel _fear_. Nagisa had done a lot of scary things this year, and giving birth was probably going to top that list, but that little kick drowned it out.

“I can’t wait to meet you,” he found himself saying gently, “please don’t hurt me too bad.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Time till birth: mere hours 
> 
> I feel like we need a drum roll or something. 
> 
> Thank you so much for sticking around for the main event! As always, I appreciate all comments and feedback!


	29. Birth Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After being rushed to the hospital, Nagisa goes into full out labour

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally.

Never in his fifteen years of life did Nagisa think walking down a flight of stairs would be such an impossible challenge, but there he was, like he was descending Mount Fuji or something. Asano didn’t offer any support, though he did stand close, surely so that Nagisa could grab onto him if he felt like he was going to fall or something. Akuma was seriously low down in him by that point, which made lifting his legs insanely difficult.

Still, he made it downstairs, a feat which deserved some kind of medal, in his mind. He also had an actual towel between his legs, which didn’t help, because he was _still_ leaking amniotic fluid. It was like everything around him became a giant blur, like it wasn’t even happening. Nagisa was just floating along, going where he was told to go without question. The idea that he was in the process of giving birth was _surreal_.

Toboso was ready for them, by the time they got outside. “Straight to the hospital, Nagisa san?”

Looking up at the night sky, Nagisa registered a snowflake land on the tip of his nose. He’d _said_ it would snow. “P-please,” he weakly attempted to bow in politeness, only really managing to move his shoulders.

Entering the car was the next challenge. Nagisa braced himself against the metal of the door, cringing at the idea of bending his knees. Toboso quickly paced forwards to help him, offering out his hand for extra support. It was a process, but eventually Nagisa managed to lower himself, sitting on the towel as he struggled to stretch the seatbelt around himself. He was surprised to see Asano join him in the back, clearly keeping an eye on him.

Once they set off, Nagisa looked out of the window as the buildings sped past. Taking a deep breath, Nagisa focused on that blur, taking his mind off the impending dread. For a moment, he couldn’t help but think back to months ago, the excruciating car ride with his mother after he’d found out he was pregnant in the first place. How far he’d come. Even back then, the weight hadn’t really dawned on him that he’d eventually _have_ his and Karma’s child. Oh, that reminded him of what he’d been forgetting. Thankfully he’d remembered his phone, and he fumbled for it.

The second he got Karma’s contact up on screen, his next contraction hit, significantly more painful than the last given his position. For some reason he panicked, thrusting the phone in Asano’s general direction.

“No way,” Asano said, looking at it. “I’m not texti-“

It was cut off by Nagisa’s involuntary groan. It hurt so _bad_. His entire body tensed up again, completely possessed by the feeling. Though it can’t have even lasted a minute, it still felt like a small eternity.

Asano swallowed. “Fine.” He snatched the device, and handed it back to Nagisa a few moments later. “That should give Akabane a sense of urgency.” 

“Thanks,” Nagisa mumbled weakly, after the contraction wore off. He decided for his own sake, he probably didn’t want to know the contents of that message.

Due to it being late, there was barely any traffic around and they reached the hospital pretty swiftly. A brand new jolt of fear went through Nagisa’s body at the sight of it, but he forced himself to keep it together, just a little longer. Surprisingly, it was a little easier getting out of the car again, though the pressure was immense.

“I’ll stay with the car,” Toboso nodded. “Good luck, Nagisa san.”

Nagisa thought he should say something more substantial, but he just couldn’t think of anything. “T-thank you,” he turned, and noticed that Asano had also got out of the car. “You’re coming?”

“Just to make sure you don’t fall over on the way in or something,” Asano replied.

Together, they made it inside the hospital emergency department. With the goal so clearly in sight, Nagisa had felt a new surge of energy overtake his body. He almost managed to walk like a normal person, all the way up to the doors. Nagisa wasn’t entirely sure how this was meant to go, but the reception desk seemed like a good start.

“U-uhm,” he said, “excuse me, I-“ His next contraction hit, unfortunately, before he could explain himself, causing him to double over.

The receptionist looked over at Asano. “Labour?”

“Yes,” he said, “for two hours now.”  

“Has his water broken?”

“Just before we left,” Asano nodded.

She smiled, lips pressed tight. “I’ll call for somebody to take you to the maternity ward.”

“Nagisa kun,” Asano turned to him, as the contraction came down. “I’ll be going back home now, okay?”

Nagisa nodded. He really should say something substantial, the situation seemed to call for it, but he just couldn’t put it into words. Perhaps he’d live to regret that, but with how overwhelmed by everything that was currently happening to him, he didn’t have the luxury of choice. There was too much he wanted to get out, but instead, Nagisa just expressed what he could in a slight smile.

“You know,” Asano said, before leaving. “People have been doing this for millions of years.”

Nagisa supposed that was his own way of saying ‘you can do this’. “Goodbye, Asano kun.”

“This way,” the receptionist said.

* * *

By the time Karma arrived, Nagisa was already strapped to a couple of monitors, wearing a hospital gown, and had been judged to be nearing five centimetres dilated. Nagisa wasn’t really sure if that was a good thing or not, but surely it meant he was halfway through this, or something. The contractions still hurt, but it wasn’t excruciating yet.

“Oh,” Karma said the second he entered the room, “you haven’t had the baby yet.”

Nagisa shifted so he was sitting more upright. “I don’t think it happens in…” he attempted to do the math, “three hours.”

“I was reading,” he said casually, targeting the chair closest the hospital bed and sitting down on it, “that one woman went to the toilet and the baby just slipped out.”

“That’s-“ There came another contraction. “ _Nice_ ,” he finished a minute later, after it was through.

Something crossed Karma’s face. “That looked worse than the other ones you’ve had.”

He looked over the clock. “N-nine minutes.” At least he was still getting a bit of rest in between. They’d been speeding up, though. That was for the best, he finally decided. He’d rather this whole process be over with as possible.

“What,” Karma said, “between contractions? Alright.”

Before Nagisa could question what he meant, Karma reclined like he was right at home, and pulled out his Nintendo DS. Nagisa just watched in shock as he casually resumed whatever game he’d been playing earlier, jaw practically dropping to the ground.

“ _What_?” He said, like he was confused that Nagisa was glaring.

“You brought your _Nintendo_?”

Karma eyed him. “It’s going to take a while, right?”

“Y-yeah, but,” Nagisa looked down. “I thought you’d be more supportive   or something,” he mumbled.

“Do you wanna play?” Karma waved the device in front of his face.

He considered it. “Yeah okay.” It wasn’t worth being mad, when they had so much ahead of them still. Honestly, it sounded like a good distraction. Nagisa took the gaming device from him, and resumed the game of Mariokart he’d been playing. Leaning in close, Karma watched him play over his shoulder.

“Overtake them,” Karma commented.

Nagisa kept his eyes on the screen. “No I wanna get the item.”

“But Nagi-“

Using his best skill, Nagisa used the controls to throw a shell at the computer player in front of him, disabling them so he could take over anyway. Surprisingly, he got pretty immersed in the game. It was a nice break from everything else, and soon, Nagisa wasn’t thinking about the pain and dread of what was happening to his body at all.

Until he got blue shelled a second away from the finish line. “No! _No!_ Damnit!”

There was a cough. “Bad contraction?”

Nagisa whipped his head around to see Doctor Shirogane had entered the room. Ignoring Karma’s slight snigger beside him, Nagisa let go of the DS and flushed. He probably looked like the worst parent _ever_. Swallowing at that thought, he tried his best to smile politely.

“Road rage,” Karma eventually said, cheerfully.

She smiled. “See, I told you it may only be hours. How are you feeling so far?”

“I’m okay,” he replied honestly. At least, he wasn’t screaming and begging for it to end, so that had to be good. “A little hungry,” he added.

“Nagisa kun,” her tone became gentle, but with a slight edge to it, “I will have to advice against eating anything.” Pressing her lips together, she nodded. “I’m not going to sugar coat it, but I don’t want you to panic either. Due to your earlier placental abruption, medically we have to consider your delivery risky. You’re clearly doing just fine right now, which is why you’re not surrounded by a team of nurses, but we have to keep it under close observation. It’s not uncommon,” she continued, “that we may need an emergency c-section. Eating food could interfere with that process.”

Squirming, Nagisa forced himself to take a deep breath. “I-I really don’t want a c-section.”

“Neither do I,” she said seriously, “and so long as things go the way they are right now, it won’t be necessary at all.” Walking over to one of the monitors, she noted something down. “The baby’s heart rate is fine right now, can you feel them moving?”

“Y-yeah.” It felt insignificant with everything else, but Akuma was still wiggling around as they always did.

She cleared her throat. “Then, just continue what you’re doing. I’m going to check you out now, alright?”

Attempting to relax his body, Nagisa let his legs part, focusing on a specific area of the wall throughout the uncomfortable examination. At least it didn’t take her that long to find what she was looking for.

“Definitely five centimetres, almost completely effaced,” she announced.

“ _Still_?” Nagisa couldn’t help but feel disappointed. He’d hoped in all that time he’d get a little closer.

She nodded. “You’re actually progressing pretty quickly, Nagisa kun. Many first timers are in labour for over a day before they get to this point. Things will speed up soon, now you’re in what we’d call the active phase. Now, are you wanting any pain relief? Though I will warn, if you choose to get an epidural, it may slow things down some.”

This was probably something he should have decided on long before. Perhaps on a whim, Nagisa decided he didn’t like the sound of it. Sure, everything was _painful_ , but it wasn’t something he couldn’t handle. People had been doing this for centuries without any kind of drugs. If all of those people could do it without any pain relief, then so could Nagisa. He wasn’t _weak_. How hard could it even be?

“No, thank you,” Nagisa finally said.

Smiling once more, Doctor Shirogane took a step back. “I’ll leave you to it, for now.”

“Aw,” Karma said once she was gone, “I was kinda looking forward to you being all drugged up and crazy.”

If Nagisa was going to complain about that comment, he was distracted by yet another contraction. It didn’t last much longer than the last one, but it definitely felt lower down in his stomach, creating a very uncomfortable pressure. Nagisa ended up gripping the sides of the hospital bed, gasping his way through it until it released his body.

“That was…” Karma started, “just under nine minutes.”

Well, at least they were creeping closer. For the next good hour of his life, that remained the trend. Though he didn’t think knowing the exact second difference in gaps between his contractions would help him, it was actually comfortable to hear that he was progressing, if only on the tiniest scale. Unfortunately, despite the pretty static time, the intensity of the contractions increased. Nagisa was beginning to lose his sense of time, only figuring it out on a proper scale whenever Karma announced them.

“Hey Nagisa,” Karma said after a particularly strong one, “it’s past midnight.”

Nagisa attempted to wipe some of the sweat from his forehead. “Hmm?”

He sighed. “That means it’s probably going to be Akuma chan’s birthday today.”

It wasn’t a bad birthday to have, Nagisa supposed. It probably meant Akuma would end up being one of the youngest in their school year, though. He was thinking _way_ too far ahead, he realised after a moment or two of daydreaming. Somehow, Nagisa thought there wouldn’t be much of a danger of him forgetting the date.

With a knock at the door, Doctor Shirogane entered the room again and repeated the same procedures. “Still at five,” she said neutrally and turned to one of the monitors, “contractions are eight minutes apart. It’s completely normal for things to slow down a little at this stage, so don’t worry. Every labour is different.”

Nagisa tried his best not to worry, but he couldn’t help but begin to feel the exhaustion. He’d been knowingly at this for four hours, and that didn’t include whatever had started during his sleep. How long had it really been? Six hours? Seven? All Nagisa really wanted to do was relax and go to sleep, but the contractions were just close enough together that he couldn’t be all calm for too long.

When she came back in again, two hours later, she announced that he’d only dilated another half a centimetre. Nagisa wanted to bury his head into the pillow and cry, at that. It had been so long, for so little. The pain was still manageable, but it was increasing. Nagisa hadn’t been able to hold back a few of his noises of discomfort, though.

“At least it’s progressing,” Karma said. He’d grown surprisingly more silent, as it went on. He appeared content in sitting beside Nagisa, counting down every second as it came. Nagisa didn’t really need or want much else, though. Not being completely alone through this was enough.

“Yeah,” Nagisa started, before his face morphed in pain. “ _Oh_ -“ His body lurched forward as he attempted to keep his breathing steady.

Karma looked over at the monitor. “Six minutes and ten seconds.”

“I just want it to be over,” he complained, body slumping backwards.

“Some things get worse before they get better, right?”

He attempted to take that as a positive, but the road ahead began to look bleaker and bleaker. The contractions only sped up after that, until he was at five minutes between each one. With the increase in frequency, so came greater intensity. Nagisa finally understood it, then. It wasn’t so much that one contraction on its own was unbearable pain, it was experiencing one after the other. With every single one, his body was getting worn down to the point he was scared it was going to break.

But he _had_ to do this. There was no way of getting around it, so Nagisa just clenched his teeth as the next one came on. He couldn’t pretend he wasn’t completely exhausted, though. Scared that he might genuinely collapse, Nagisa turned his head towards Karma. He’d lost all sense of time.

“What time is it?”

Karma looked over at the clock. “Just gone past half three.”

It felt so fast, yet and like an eternity. Like a _lifetime_ ago since his water even broke. The time between contractions was beginning to morph into less of a small period of rest, and instead into their own type of small hell. He was just tensing the whole time, trying to steel his body in preparation for the next contraction.

“What is it?” Nagisa bit out, way harsher than he’d intended to, when he picked up on Karma looking concernedly at him.

Karma swallowed, his face pale. “You skipped a whole minute.”

Sweating, Nagisa tried to take that in. “What do you mean?”

“That was only four minutes,” he said seriously, “just under.”

“O-oh.”

Studying him, Karma went to his feet. “I’m going to go get Doctor Shirogane, okay?”

A spike of fear shot through his entire body. Not necessarily because this whole process might be coming to an end, although that _was_ scary, but because Karma had suggested leaving him. Knowing it wasn’t permanent, Nagisa forced himself to nod his consent, but the moment he stepped out of the room, Nagisa was _miserable_. Somehow, Karma’s presence had been keeping him sane throughout it all. Alone, he didn’t know _what_ to do.

Karma couldn’t have been gone for more than a minute, mostly calculated by the fact Nagisa hadn’t had another contraction by the time he and Doctor Shirogane arrived again.

“Alright, Nagisa kun,” she said, “sounds like you may be moving into transition.”

Transition? Transitioning into _what_? Nagisa was about to ask, but then she went and checked his dilation again. He still had some sense of shame, enough that he wasn’t about to strike up a conversation whilst she had her fingers inside him.

“Seven centimetres,” she announced happily. “Nagisa kun, I need you to focus on this, okay?”

Nagisa shifted. “Okay.”

“It’s going to get a lot worse from here on out, so prepare yourself.” She swallowed. “It won’t be long now at all. I’ll be checking you frequently, from now on, but it’s your body. You have to let us know when you start to feel the urge to push, okay?”

He supposed he could do that. With a slight increase in motivation, Nagisa felt ready for the next contraction, though it still came far too soon. And then the next one came so shortly after, and he really begun to sweat. The one after that was just short of agonising, but Nagisa managed to close his eyes tightly, getting through it.

And then it was as if all hell broke loose.

Nagisa had no other way to describe it apart from it being like some sort of floodgate just broke. It went from waiting between contractions to one giant blur. It barely seemed like there was time to _breathe_ before the next one hit, and with the effort he quickly made to take air into his lungs, there was no rest. Then there were the contractions themselves, as if his body was being roasted by fire from the inside out.

He didn’t even know what noises he was making, except that there definitely was noise. He couldn’t bring himself to care much about it, though. It was like tunnel vision for a moment, where he could think about the pain and _only_ the pain. After what felt like several solid minutes of contractions, his stomach began to churn.

“I-I feel sick,” he managed to get out. No sooner had he said it, a plastic tub was practically shoved onto his chest. With the added motivation, he couldn’t help but throw up into it. Unfortunately, it didn’t make him feel much better at all, as it was followed straight away by another hellish contraction.

“I’ll buy you sushi,” Karma said suddenly, once the contraction came down, causing Nagisa to turn his head to look at him. There was an unmistakable terror in his eyes.

“W-wha-“

“You haven’t been able to really eat it in months, right?” He spoke frantically. “After this, I’ll get you a platter.”

Nagisa groaned. “I just threw up and you want to talk about _sush-_ Ah!” Another contraction hit him.

“I’m sorry,” he said, a whisper that barely made its way to Nagisa’s ears. “I don’t know how else to help.”

He couldn’t stop himself from feeling guilty. What did he even look like? Nothing short of one gigantic mess, probably. Nagisa, internally, thought that maybe he should be handling this better than he currently was. He should be happy, excited, not just thinking of how miserable the pain was making him feel. But then the next contraction came, and he forgot all about it.

“How far _now_?” Nagisa demanded.

Doctor Shirogane checked him. “Around eight and a half centimetres. You’re doing great, Nagisa kun.”

 _‘Great’_. He definitely didn’t feel great. A kind of mania was taking over him, causing his body to go frantic. Finding himself writhing, Nagisa felt like some kind of torture victim. He just couldn’t get a break, it was endless, like a new existence where this torment was final.

“Can I-“ Karma started.

Nagisa snapped, his voice bringing him out of his own little world. “Karma, I _hate_ you!” He screeched. “You did this to me!” And then the worst of the contraction started to drop, more guilt filling his entire body. He couldn’t hold his own tears back. “I-I’m s-sorry,” he said, “I didn’t mean that.”

Karma swallowed. “Is it helping?”

“H-huh?”

“Is hating me helping?”

Squeezing his eyes shut through another one, Nagisa attempted to consider it. “A little bit,” he replied weakly.

“Then,” Karma said, “I don’t mind if you hate me. Is there anything I can do?”

“I don’t know,” Nagisa managed, “just-“ His next contraction hit before he could think of what he really wanted. Hand flying out to grab the side of the hospital bed, Nagisa ended up accidentally catching Karma’s instead. It felt slightly better than the cool feel of the bed, to have a (somewhat sweaty) warmth grip him back.

As the next few came and went, Karma got closer to him. Though he didn’t really understand how, if only for a few minutes, the pain softened. He wasn’t entirely aware of what was going on, but he was sure Karma was doing _something_ to make his body relax. With his free hand, Karma moved the sweaty hair out of Nagisa’s forehead.

“Feels nice,” Nagisa muttered. As a result, Karma continued to stroke his hair, threading his fingers across his scalp soothingly.  

All of that was the calm before the storm. When it hit, it hit _hard_. In all the hours of suffering, Nagisa hadn’t screamed yet. He’d shouted, cried out, groaned, and half shrieked, but he hadn’t _screamed_. Honestly, he’d thought that was just something that happened in movies or medical dramas. But he just couldn’t hold it back anymore. As the only physical release for how he was feeling, Nagisa screamed. He screamed and screamed until his throat was raw.

“I want the epidural now!” Nagisa yelled through tears.

“Nagisa kun,” Doctor Shirogane said levelly, “you’re too far along for that.”

“ _What_?!”

She looked at him sympathetically. “It would take around an hour to order for one, get an anaesthesiologist here, and for it to actually kick in. Honestly Nagisa kun, I think your baby will be here by then.”

 If Nagisa could go backwards in time, to when he’d rejected the pain relief in the first place, he might murder himself. There was no way it was possible for a human to go through all of this and survive it. Surely, surely there was only so much agony a human body could take before it gave out. Nagisa was definitely reaching that limit, if not already on it.

There was no possible escape from it. And, oddly, Nagisa didn’t even care about the prospect of meeting his child anyway. He was in so much torture, and it was all because of this _mistake_. Nagisa regretted it so much, right then. Nothing was worth _this._ In that moment, he would take everything that had happened between him and Karma back in a heartbeat.

He didn’t even have what was lying next as motivation. Who had he been kidding? Nagisa wasn’t ready to be a parent _at all_. He couldn’t undo it, and now he was going to be stuck with a baby. Fear mixed with hate ran through his veins. His body had been taken over and destroyed, by this. Honestly, Nagisa was sure he would die.

“It hurts so fucking bad,” he sobbed.

“I don’t think I’ve ever heard you curse before,” Karma pointed out, just the slightest amount of amusement in his tone.

Nagisa didn’t drop his hand, but he did glare, immediately irritated. “If you say anything like that again I will _kill you_ with my own two hands _right here right now_.”

“From the hospital bed?”

“Don’t think I couldn’t!”

Karma squeezed his hand tighter. “I know you could.”

He tried to catch up with his breathing again, letting the sudden spike of bloodlust fade into the background. With it, and the pressure, Nagisa just about noticed a faint wiggling motion very low in his abdomen. It made his brain falter, for a second. He didn’t _really_ hate this child, did he? Trembling, Nagisa knew he didn’t. He wouldn’t have given them a name (or, a kind of name) otherwise, right? He _had_ to do this.

“Nagisa kun,” Doctor Shirogane said, after an amount of time he wasn’t sure of had passed. “Ten centimetres. Are you ready?”

He hadn’t even noticed her checking him. “R-ready?”

She gave him a knowing look. “It’s time to meet that baby of yours. Is there a position you’d rather be in?”

Frankly, Nagisa wasn’t sure he could move even if he tried to. “L-like this,” he managed.

“Okay,” she said, “you can put your legs up on the stirrups here. Are you with me?”

Nagisa did as she said, the prospect of this all being over soon suddenly highly appealing. “Mmhmm.”

“Your body is your guide, okay? I promise you, it knows what to do. When you feel the urge, push with your contractions.” 

With the amount of pressure in his lower half, Nagisa didn’t think there was much else he could’ve done. The excruciating contractions still went on, but he was filled with a new burst of energy. As it turned out, she was incredibly right. Like something weird came over him, Nagisa’s body worked of its own accord. Somehow, it was the easiest thing he’d done so far.

The contractions slowed down a little, giving him a chance to _really_ catch his breath. It just felt natural, the instructions shoved deep into his instincts somewhere. As each surge went through him, Nagisa went along with it, physically feeling the baby travelling lower. It was still painful, but also kind of weird.

“I-I can feel it,” he let out, bearing down.

Not only could he simply feel it, he could feel every single millimetre of his body stretch far beyond its limits. He still couldn’t hold back his tears or cries of pain, not when he could feel the baby moving lower and lower. After each contraction, it seemed to be going back up again, but he couldn’t _stop_ himself. This was all his body was.

If somebody had told him he’d be right here a year ago, physically giving birth to his and Karma’s child, Nagisa wouldn’t have believed them.

Right when Nagisa thought there couldn’t possibly be much further to go, he started to scream again. Not only was the stretch unbearable, it _burned_. Except, burn was almost an understatement. There was no other pain on earth he’d experienced before it that came close.

“I can see them,” Doctor Shirogane announced. “You’re starting to crown.”

 _Yeah_ , Nagisa thought, _no kidding_.

“I’m going to need you to _really_ push now,” she said calmly, “the hardest pushes you can give me.”

“I can’t!” Nagisa screamed in a voice that wasn’t his own. “I _can’t_ do this!”

He tried, he really did, but he just couldn’t. And just when he focused on the pain once more, everything seemed to go white. Had he _really_ actually died? Suddenly, Nagisa just couldn’t feel a thing. It was so _intense_. Where was he again? Nagisa experienced the weirdest kind of sensation, like he could just fade away.

“Nagisa,” a faint voice came. “Nagisa. Nagisa!”

Nagisa jolted, and turned his head, meeting Karma’s burning eyes. “I-I-“

Karma squeezed his hand so impossibly tight. “You can do this. I _know_ that you can. Where’s the Nagisa I know, huh? He doesn’t just _give_ up, no matter how hard things get. You need to hang in there, okay?”

Somehow, it was exactly what Nagisa needed to hear. Nodding vigorously, he renewed his efforts, pushing with all the force in his body when the next contraction came. Though he was sure his lungs would run out of oxygen, he continued, entirely overwhelmed by sensation.

“That’s the head! Umbilical cord isn’t a problem, you’re good to go,” Doctor Shirogane said. “One more big push, and you’re done.”

He wasn’t really listening, though. Using Karma’s hand to anchor him to the earth, he gave it every single thing he had inside of him, the strain taking over everything. There was no measure for how long it lasted, until it was over, and he suddenly felt very empty. Instantly, his body slumped.

And then the room was filled with this unmistakable sharp, high pitched crying.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What, you thought I wasn't going to cliffhanger you? 
> 
> Whoops? 
> 
> On a side note - officially this chapter means we're at 100k! I promise I didn't actually plan this, it was more a happy accident, to be honest. I can't believe it though, honestly. 
> 
> Until next time~ You know what to do.


	30. Time To Meet E-29

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a long and painful birth, Karma and Nagisa finally get to meet their new baby

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How did this even get so long?

Back in elementary school, when he was very young, Nagisa remembered a teacher standing at the front of the classroom and lecturing the class about what love was. Back then, he hadn’t paid much attention to it. There wasn’t much to think about, love had just been yet another emotion. He’d understood it. Nagisa thought he knew what love was. The way he used to cling onto both his parents when he was young, before their issues really started. The way his chest tightened and his heart began to pound when he watched his favourite movie. A smile between friends who trusted each other. Even the abstract idea of a wedding in spring between two partners. Those were all what he would consider love.  

But then he faintly heard the words ‘it’s a boy’, and suddenly Nagisa wasn’t so sure anymore.

A kind of lull set over him, as his body recognised its desperate need to rest. He found himself shuddering, like everything was going out of focus. His body had gone through a lot, after all. Absently, Nagisa didn’t expect he’d recover from it any time soon.

There was a weight handed to him, jolting him awake, and Nagisa knew he had been wrong about love. Love was resting in his very arms, and his body felt too _small_ for it. He hadn’t even noticed himself start to cry again, softer this time, but his vision was blurry and he could feel wetness as he tried to blink himself out of it. A small movement further knocked him out of his daze, and then Nagisa finally looked down.

A baby was on his chest. During the living nightmare that had been the last stages, the top of his hospital gown must have been stripped from him, though he didn’t remember how. He could feel it though, the way the baby almost snuggled right against his bare skin. No, not just any baby. _His_ baby. Living, breathing, and right in his arms. He was all wrinkly and a bright red and purple colour, plus covered in blood, but it didn’t matter.

“He’s p-perfect,” Nagisa got out. It wasn’t just a black and white baby shape, anymore, or the infuriating kick of feet inside his stomach. He was so perfect, in fact, that he couldn’t even remember any of the pain it took to get him here.

“You did a great job, Nagisa kun,” Doctor Shirogane said carefully. “I’m going to cut the umbilical cord now, and then we can see about getting him cleaned up.”

Nagisa attempted to pay attention to her, but he just couldn’t take his eyes away from his baby. He had a _son._ Though it was all screwed up from the crying, Nagisa studied his face, committing it all to memory. He wouldn’t forget this ever, he was certain. Only faintly registering her clamping the cord in two places before snipping it, he continued to hold his baby close.

“W-why’s he so sad?” He couldn’t stop himself from questioning, as he continued to cry.

The doctor chuckled. “He’s just exercising his lungs, that’s all. Well, I don’t think we need to worry about his breathing.” 

Finally, she handed him a warm towel. Before she gave him the instruction, Nagisa automatically knew what to do, cleaning some of the blood from the baby’s body. Terrified of accidentally hurting him, Nagisa used the lightest pressure he could muster, cleaning him up just a bit, though he still retained the colouring. As Nagisa did it, the crying calmed down. The baby’s crying, that was - Nagisa was still a mess.

She brought out a stethoscope, placing it on the baby’s chest, whilst writing down whatever she needed to. Nagisa allowed her to manoeuvre him around as she went through whatever tests she was doing, checking his reflexes and pulse. Somehow, Nagisa already knew the verdict. This baby was entirely healthy, after everything.

Finally, he began to blink, opening up his miniscule eyes. A fresh bout of tears slipped out of Nagisa, as he gazed down. He had Karma’s eyes, a weird cross between mercury and gold. Honestly, Nagisa had always thought newborns looked kind of alike, but not this one. The more he looked, the more Nagisa could tell he’d end up with _a lot_ of Karma’s features.

“I-is he meant to be that small?” Karma questioned, beside him, piercing the small bubble Nagisa was in. That was right, Nagisa wasn’t just in his own little world.

Doctor Shirogane cleared her throat. “If it’s okay, I’d like to measure him… Nagisa kun?”

He didn’t want to tear his eyes away. “Where are you taking him?”

“Just over there,” she said kindly, and gestured the other side of the room. “You’ll be able to see him, don’t worry.”

“O-okay,” Nagisa, though incredibly reluctantly, allowed her to take him.

She wasn’t gone for long, at least. That didn’t mean every inch of his body didn’t _itch_ , though. Nagisa never thought it was possible to be so attached to another living thing, but there he was. The impossible had been achieved already that day, so really there shouldn’t be much left to shock him.

“Five pounds and six ounces,” she announced, “a little small but not in any danger. Forty nine centimetres long. All ten fingers, all ten toes. Time and date of birth: February 21st, 6:42 am. So far,” she came over, having dressed him in a blue hat and blanket, “perfectly healthy. We’ll need to take him for some more tests in a while, but that can wait just a little.”

Nagisa felt better, now he was had his baby back in his arms. Now that he had been mentioned, he really was _tiny_. If Doctor Shirogane said he was fine, then Nagisa wasn’t worried. He’d felt so much bigger coming out. It made his heart jump up into his throat, just seeing how small and helpless he was. Honestly, Nagisa kind of felt the same way.

“Do you two have a name yet? I’ll have to get them to sort out an ankle bracelet.”

They’d never talked about it, not really. Not an _actual_ name. Looking down at his baby, Nagisa realised a name like ‘Akuma’ was far too harsh. He was just too _pretty_ to be named anything demonic. Finally forcing himself to tear his eyes away, Nagisa found himself looking at Karma, who his gaze immediately. Karma still looked incredibly pale, lips uselessly parted. It was clear that neither of them had a clue.

“Don’t worry about it right now,” she said, sensing their hesitation. “We’ll just call him Baby Shiota.”

“Oh no,” Nagisa shifted, speaking the thought that came into his mind. That left a bad taste in his mouth for some reason, it just felt wrong. “Akabane.”

“Nagisa…” Karma said with a slight edge to his tone.

Nagisa swallowed. “I don’t like using my family name anyway. He doesn’t need to carry it on.” He looked at Karma properly. “Uhm, it doesn’t have to be that, if you don’t want it.”

“I-I don’t mind.”  

“Okay then,” Doctor Shirogane said, “Baby Akabane it is. If you don’t mind me saying, he’s a very beautiful baby. You both did a good job with him.”

He couldn’t help but feel a weird kind of selfish pride at that. Of course, _he_ knew this was the most beautiful baby that had existed ever, but it felt kind of good that other people recognised that too. God, Nagisa wasn’t going to turn into one of _those_ parents, was he? His baby made this kind of yawning motion, rubbing his cheek against Nagisa’s chest as his eyes fell closed, and Nagisa fell in love all over again.

“It might be best to take him whilst he’s sleepy,” Doctor Shirogane said softly.

Automatically, Nagisa clutched him tighter. “No taking him.”

She patted his leg sympathetically. “It’s only to make sure he really is completely healthy, and it’s only for a few hours. Honestly, take advantage of this. It’ll be the last time you sleep in a _long_ time. Besides, you’ll have the pass the afterbirth shortly.”

That didn’t sound good. It felt physically awful to do so, but Nagisa slowly offered up his baby. Annoyingly, she was right. With the extra shot of adrenaline fading somewhat, Nagisa was definitely beginning to feel every single ounce of exhaustion. Still, he cringed to see her take him, putting him on some kind of medical transportation _thing_. He craned his neck, attempting to keep his eyes on him. 

“K-Karma,” Nagisa found himself weakly calling out. It was a bit pathetic, but he couldn’t help it. “Keep an eye on him?”

Eyes widening a little, Karma nodded. “Okay, I promise, Nagisa.” He turned to the doctor. “Is that allowed?”

She smiled. “Right this way.”

* * *

With his nose pressed right up to the glass of the nursery window, Karma couldn’t help but feel just a little bit lost. Alright, more than a little bit. Still, he had a promise to keep, and he wasn’t going back on it. As much as Karma didn’t even want to look too hard, his eyes flew to his son, calmly sleeping in the little cot the hospital had given him. Well, wasn’t that crazy? He had a _son_.

Karma found himself clenching his fist and swallowing. For the first few seconds of the baby’s life, Karma’s brain had gone into overdrive. Sure, he’d known this would end with a baby, but it was very different _seeing_ it. He’d dropped Nagisa’s hand in shock, at the first glimpse of his poor, confused, squirming body. And then, frighteningly, Karma had begun to feel the dread.

He’d reached his fear quota for one day, surely. Karma had never had a problem with witnessing pain or gore or anything like that before, sometimes he even _enjoyed_ it. But seeing Nagisa go through all of that? It might haunt him. With the way he’d been screaming, Karma had at least for a few seconds thought that maybe, Nagisa might die.

But Nagisa seemed fine in the end, holding their child close, and Karma’s heart dropped down into his stomach. He couldn’t bear to really take it in, to pay much attention to his son’s face. If he did, then it would surely play on repeat in his head, unforgettable. With how determined Nagisa was to give him up, there was no other way. Truly knowing what his son looked like, holding him… It would be impossible to part with him forever.

After all of that, though, Karma wouldn’t fight it. Amazingly, he knew for certain now that Nagisa was simply stronger than he was, in every single way. Had that been him, Karma probably _would_ have died. With that in mind, he knew deep down that it was only right to let Nagisa make that choice. Karma would just have to find it within him to deal with it, somehow.

A nurse popped her head out of the door. “Akabane san?”

Of course, Karma had been standing like that for a few hours, and he was currently the only person in the room, though people came and went. The baby had been born just in time for the sunrise of a new day, and now it was almost noon. But he had to keep up his agreement – no letting the baby out of his sight. Or, that was how he chose to interpret it. Nagisa was kind of hard to understand sometimes.

“Yeah?” Karma turned to face the smiling young woman.

She beamed. “You know, your son is easily the most behaved one here.”

Karma snorted. “Of course he is.” He definitely got that from Nagisa.

“Mm,” she continued, “barely any crying at all.”

He knew that. He’d been watching as the nurses came and went, checking up on him. Well, at least his son was under good care. It still felt really kind of surreal, like Karma could blink and all of this would be a dream. Likely, it didn’t help that he didn’t know how he was supposed to _react_ to all of this. Nagisa had cried, but Karma didn’t really feel that.

Leaning against the door, she raised her eyebrows. “Do you want to come see him properly? You’ve been stood here since before my shift even started.”

Clenching his teeth, Karma just didn’t know. On the one hand, he knew that it was for the best to not go with her, but now she’d offered… He didn’t have that kind of impulse control. Presenting the wristband he’d been given just before the tests were done, he was allowed in. It took all of his nerve to approach, his legs practically turning into twin steel rods.

The baby was much more normal looking, he noticed. Not quite what Karma was used to from movies and stuff, but a little more like what he’d expected. Peering into the crib, bright eyes seemed to gaze back at him. Breath catching in his throat, Karma couldn’t help but take in that soft yet inquisitive look, something he’d seen Nagisa wear countless times.

“Want to try holding him?”

He began to panic again. “What if I hurt him?” It wasn’t something Karma would admit under any other circumstance, ever, but he really was scared. He didn’t _know_ how to do this. Generally, he didn’t know much about babies at all, except that they cried and slept a lot.

She smiled. “I’ll spot you. Don’t worry, babies are less fragile than they look. Here,” bending down slightly, she picked him up gently, “sit down on that chair over there, I’ll hand him to you. That might seem a little less daunting.”

For some reason, Karma felt compelled to do as he was told. It wasn’t something he often felt the urge to do, but with the weight of everything he decided not to question it. She, at least, seemed to know what she was doing. He followed her direction to adapt his arm into a cradling position, though it felt incredibly foreign to him.

“Make sure to support the head,” she said, placing him gently into Karma’s arms. “He doesn’t know how to hold it up for himself just yet.”

He hoped he was getting it right. His baby’s head seemed pretty snug in his elbow, though it was half pressed against his chest. Karma was basically holding him with one arm, although he didn’t move his other one, _just in case_. The baby didn’t seem that interested in what was going on, blinking slowly like he was in a daze. With how sleep deprived Karma currently was, he couldn’t help but relate.

Unconsciously, he’d moved his free hand a little, still trying to get it into his head that he was holding a living, breathing, tiny person. A miniscule hand clutched around his index finger, and suddenly everything shattered. He was sure his jaw must have dropped, as he watched his son grab onto him. There weren’t any tears or anything, but it was close. Instantly, Karma knew he’d throw himself in front of a rain of bullets for this child.

“He’s strong,” Karma said, not to anybody in particular.

The nurse cleared her throat. “I’d let you have a moment alone, but security…”

Karma nodded. How could something so little create that kind of pressure?

He must have said that aloud. “Trust me,” she replied amicably, “you’re not the first new father to be bewildered, and I can guarantee you won’t be the last.”

 _Father_. He supposed that was true, there was no way around it. That… would take a lot of getting used to. It seemed worth it, somehow. Karma just needed to pull himself together. He didn’t have the time to be terrified anymore, or, at least, _show_ that he was. 

“That was my pager,” she said suddenly. “Looks like Shiota san is awake.”

* * *

Every inch of Nagisa’s body _hurt_. It wasn’t pain like labour had been, more like a whole body deep ache. The kind of soreness that made the prospect of walking anywhere anytime soon seem highly unappealing. It all felt like one gigantic blur, unclear in his memory from start to finish. He knew that he’d had the baby, and basically passed out soon after he was wheeled away. With his absence, in that hospital room all alone, it didn’t really feel real.

But then there was a knock at the door, and his _very_ real son was wheeled into the room. Nagisa shifted so he was sitting more upright, cringing as he did so. It wasn’t really an actual crib, more like a box on wheels. He couldn’t help but think that was a tiny bit funny. He was being pushed by a nurse, but Karma followed closely behind, looking more than a little exhausted. Nagisa’s stomach twisted with guilt at that, considering he’d had the luxury of a nap for a few hours.

“How are you feeling?” The nurse said, checking some kind of chart. “Your baby’s been given an all clear, by the way.”

Nagisa hadn’t been worried about it, but he still felt a little relieved. “I’m okay,” he said, though his voice was a little croaky and raw from all the screaming.

“I’m happy to leave you now,” she explained. “Picking him up and putting him back down again is easy, here.”

Deciding it was probably in his best interests to do so, Nagisa paid very close attention. Every word she said, about how to cup his head properly, and make sure he was leaning against his chest correctly, was etched into his brain. He really didn’t want to accidentally hurt him as a result of his inexperience. Still, after everything, it didn’t sound _too_ hard.

“He’ll probably need feeding in an hour or so,” she said, once he was safely in Nagisa’s arms again. “You’ll be able to tell, they usually start turning their head from side to side and make sucking motions. When that happens,” she said, “just press this button, and somebody will come in with a bottle of formula. Cotton wool, water, and things are at this station here, for when you need to change him. Again, just press the button, if you need anything.”

The moment she left the room, Nagisa definitely felt overwhelmed. Looking down at his soon, who was currently yawning sleepily, calmed him down, somewhat. He looked a little different from the wrinkled and shrieking thing that had come out of him, a lot more decidedly like Karma, now he wasn’t covered in blood. Not that Nagisa was unused to seeing Karma covered in blood…

Gulping, it dawned on Nagisa that he was responsible for this life now, from that moment up until the day he died. It was a heavy weight to carry, but Nagisa realised he wouldn’t want any other reality. He wouldn’t be letting go of his son anytime soon. At that thought, a whisper of dread set in. Letting go of him was exactly what Nagisa had set his mind upon, wasn’t it? Even at the thought, Nagisa burst into tears.

“Why are you crying?”

Whipping his head around witnesses the slightly concerned way Karma was looking at him, Nagisa continued to lose it. “I-I can’t do it,” he admitted. “I can’t give him up.”

Karma bit his lip. “Nagisa-“

“I won’t!” Nagisa continued. “He- I- I love him too much.”

“Okay,” he said, with a hint of carefulness.

“U-uhm,” Nagisa said, despite the shame that was rushing through him. “You don’t have to do a-anything.”

Something harsh came over Karma’s expression. “You seriously think I’d just walk out on you like that?”

Nagisa didn’t know what to think. He was making this decision selfishly, he knew, and the less people it implicated, the better. It was the most selfish thing he’d ever done in his life, honestly, but any other ‘choice’ felt so incredibly wrong to him.

“N-no,” Nagisa said, “but-“

“If you want to be in this,” Karma said slowly, “we’re in it together, okay? He’s mine too.”

It felt too ideal, too unrealistically good a situation for this to end in. Of course, he had no idea how they’d manage it. Right then, though, he didn’t _care_. His hormones were too high. They could figure it out another day, maybe. One day to just be plainly in his own little bubble would okay, right? He certainly felt like he deserved it, after the toll taken on his body.

Nagisa swallowed, turning his attention back to his son. Honestly, he was still in awe of him. “Look what we made, Karma.”

At least, Karma certainly appeared happy. “You know, now we’re keeping him, he needs a name. I’m tired of just thinking of him as ‘the baby’.”

“Hmm?”

“Well,” Karma said, moving closer, “unless you seriously still want to call him Akuma. It’s a cool name and all, but-”

“No,” Nagisa said immediately. “I don’t think it suits him anymore.” But what did? He didn’t have a clue about what names were good for babies. Maybe Karma did. He was smart. “Why don’t you choose?”

Karma snorted. “I don’t exactly have a dictionary of baby names in my head.”

“It was your suggestion!”

“I don’t know… Luffy?” He pronounced, his accent butchering the word a little.

Nagisa wrinkled his nose. “Like One Piece?”

Karma shrugged. “Eh… Goku? Sasuke? Satoshi? Kirito?”

Looking down, Nagisa felt like it was useless. “We’re not naming him after any popular anime characters. And Kirito isn’t even a real name.”

Going silent for a moment, Nagisa thought Karma had just given up or something, but then he perked up. “How about… _Nirvana_?”

“That’s kind of weird,” Nagisa said. “How would you even write that?”

Quickly, Karma seemed to spot some sort of clipboard with a pen attached to it. Before Nagisa had the chance to question whether he was allowed to do that or not, Karma was already writing something down, pausing to think for just a moment before he scribbled.

“Look, see, like how you’d say Nirvana in Japanese,” he passed over the sheet.

It wasn’t the type of kanji Nagisa was typically exposed to, though he did recognise it. “But you want it pronounced like it is in the other language? It sounds a bit like one of those weird sparkly names… Nobody would know how to pronounce it.”

“It’s better than a boring, regular name. He doesn’t need to be called something typical like Haruto or Hinata or Asahi or something.”

Nagisa sighed. “That just reminds me of beer.”

Smirking, Karma seemed to have an idea. “Maybe we really should call him that, remind him of his origins.”

He couldn’t help but gasp “Karma! That’s so harsh!”

Karma looked out of the window. “It’s still snowing outside. How about Yuki?”

“I don’t think naming him after the weather is much better,” Nagisa admitted. Personally, his own mind was coming out blank. His baby wiggled in his arms, like he was impatient to just be given a name. “Already pretty smart, huh?” He said it softly, impressed with his son’s attempt to gain his attention.

Like inspiration had suddenly struck, Karma grabbed for the piece of paper again, though it didn’t take him that long. He slid it over to Nagisa. “You can spell it like that, right?”

Nagisa read it, and thought about it for a moment. “Daichi,” he tested, “with the kanji for ‘great wisdom’. Akabane Daichi...” The more he considered, the more he kind of liked it. Somehow, it suited him. “Hi Daichi,” he said, addressing his son.

“You want to stick with it?”

“Yeah,” he said. “I like it.”

Karma moved the paper away. “Are you _sure_ about the family name?”

“Oh,” Nagisa said. He’d been pretty out of it, back when he said that. But his sentiments still stood. How often had he instructed people to not call him by his family name, anyway? “I’m sure. Akabane Daichi has a better ring to it than Shiota Daichi.”

Surprisingly, after that was settled, there didn’t seem much else to do. Nagisa wasn’t bored though, somehow. Seeing his son, who now had a real name of his own, squirm in his arms was more than enough to keep him occupied. He really wouldn’t ever get tired of it. Even when a nurse came in with a large lunch, and he had to hand Daichi over to Karma so he could eat, he kept his eyes trained on him.

Though he’d expended so much energy the night before, Nagisa wasn’t actually that hungry. His stomach had deflated a little, looking more like he’d swallowed a balloon rather than a beach ball, and he wasn’t exactly jumping at the idea of filling it back up again. Though it wasn’t just a vanity thing, he supposed otherwise he just wasn’t in the mood for food.

After he couldn’t eat anymore, and Daichi was passed back to him, Nagisa felt exhausted again. But he didn’t want to miss anything. Daichi began to turn his head from side to side, parting his lips and closing them again like he was trying to do an impression of a fish. It was nothing short of adorable, but then Nagisa remembered what the nurse had said.

“I think he got jealous of my food,” Nagisa explained, pressing the button.

Honestly, he didn’t know if his instinctual judgement was correct or not. As far as he’d been aware, you only knew babies were hungry when they started crying. But Nagisa didn’t have the energy to deal with crying right there and then, so he hoped he was guessing right.

A different nurse came in that time, carrying a small bottle. “Ah, is someone getting hungry?”

“I think so,” Nagisa said, still uncertain. It felt a little embarrassing, that he had to check with somebody else first. Shouldn’t this just be the kind of thing he sensed?

She smiled. “Well caught. You know, a lot of people tend to leave it until the baby starts shrieking. It’s a sign you’ll soon be a natural at this.”

That made him feel a tiny bit better about it. Tentatively, he took the bottle from her, not that he knew what to do with it. Sure, the basics were pretty obvious, but what if Nagisa did it the wrong way and made him choke or something? Did babies instinctively know how to drink, or was it one of those things they picked up like walking or speaking?

Noticing his hesitation, the nurse came a little closer. “Would you like a little help?”

“Yes please,” he admitted quietly, shamefully.

“I remember when I had my first,” she spoke softly, “it was incredibly daunting. Here, make sure his head is propped up so he can still breathe properly. Don’t try and force it, just press it to his lips and he’ll have it if he wants it.”

Nagisa tried his best to do what she said. It took him a moment, but sure enough, Daichi opened his mouth and began to suck on the rubber teat thing. After the nurse’s instruction to tilt the bottle a little differently to make sure he wasn’t accidentally taking in air rather than milk formula, Nagisa realised it really wasn’t that hard. Daichi at least seemed content, powerfully gulping it all down until he was done with the small amount in the bottle, only stopping the suckling when it was clear there was none left. He let go, producing this kind of sighing noise that made Nagisa’s heart burst into pieces.

After she’d shown him how to wind him properly, she left again. Now that he was full, Daichi seemed to go out like a light, apparently happy to take a nap. Reluctantly, Nagisa decided it was probably better to put him down again. He _really_ didn’t want to, but it was better than accidentally nudging him awake or something.

“You should get some sleep too,” Nagisa said, very quietly. “I kind of made you stay up.”

Karma waved him off. “’m fine. There’s nowhere to sleep, anyway.”

Shuffling over a little, Nagisa patted the space beside him. “There’s room up here. I don’t mind.”

It didn’t seem like Karma was going to fight him on it. The second he was up on that bed beside Nagisa, his eyelids drooped, and he was quickly asleep. Nagisa owed him at least that, considering it was really _his_ fault he was so tired in the first place. Unfortunately, Karma’s chosen sleeping position involved using his shoulder as a pillow, so Nagisa couldn’t move much. His eyes roamed from Karma’s sleeping form to Daichi’s. The apple sure didn’t fall too far from the tree.

Nagisa rested his own eyes too for a while, taking advantage of the opportunity for rest whilst he still had the luxury. It was like that weird space between sleep and consciousness, where he wasn’t really sure if he was actually resting or not. After a while, he sensed Daichi was fussing, so Nagisa bent over as best he could to pick him up again. A quick glance at the clock told him nearly two and a half hours had passed. Maybe he was hungry again.

Somehow, Karma managed to sleep through the nurse coming in with the bottle, though she did make an effort to be quiet after noticing him. Daichi seemed more reluctant this time, taking quite a while to latch on. When he eventually did start drinking, he only seemed to want half the bottle, pulling away from it strongly. Nagisa tried his best not to worry about it. After all, _he_ didn’t always feel like a full meal.

Eventually, Karma did actually stir, probably from all the jostling it took to get into a comfortable position. He didn’t complain, though, and left his head right where it was for a moment, before he sat up properly. It was weirdly serene. For a while, they were both content to stay there, looking down at their son together.

“He sure is cute, isn’t he?” Nagisa said eventually.

“Of course he is,” Karma replied. “He has half of my DNA.”

Nagisa couldn’t help but roll his eyes. “Yeah, he _totally_ gets that from _you_.”

Not picking up on his sarcasm, or more likely choosing to ignore it, Karma’s hand moved over to him. “Well he got the size from you. Isn’t that right, Tiny?”

With the way Karma’s hand was positioned, it was actually covering Nagisa’s. He wasn’t sure if it was the hormones or the confusion of everything, but Nagisa’s heart began to beat just a little bit faster, a warm heat spreading through him. It was nice, being so close like this. It almost felt like _family_. On a whim, he turned his head, only to find Karma staring back at him. Swallowing the lump in his throat, Nagisa realised just _how_ close they were. Practically sharing air, uncontrollably, Nagisa felt his lips begin to pucker in preparation-

“Oh,” a nurse said, “I’m sorry to disturb you!”

They practically snapped apart.

“It’s fine,” Karma said, voice a little strained.

Her lips pressed tightly together. “There are some visitors waiting for you in reception. Shall I give them the okay?”

“Visitors?” Nagisa questioned aloud.

“Twenty five teenagers,” she said, “and a… weird looking man.”

That probably wasn’t something she saw every single day of her job. The fact that he and Karma were both still only fifteen was probably strange enough, she probably wasn’t ready to deal with a whole band of misfit kids. Nagisa was surprised they’d all even come, to be honest. He didn’t know how they’d even found _out_.

He felt a little bit happy, though. “Sure,” he said, “let them in.”

Nagisa wasn’t expecting much else, but he was still taken aback when within five minutes, his bedside was absolutely surrounded by his classmates. He barely had time to blink, before there was just a chorus of coos and so many questions that Nagisa couldn’t even register, let alone answer. Not that he wasn’t grateful for the enthusiasm… His son wasn’t even a full day old, yet he was more popular than Nagisa had _ever_ been. Somehow, that seemed a little unfair.

“You have to give them some space!” Korosensei said, having disposed of whatever disguise he’d arrived in. “No overcrowding the baby!”

Automatically, everyone took a step back, finally giving Nagisa enough space to think.

Nagisa gathered his courage. “Everyone, this is Akabane Daichi.” After he said it, he peeled back the swaddling cloth the hospital had provided a little, holding him up slightly so they could see him properly.

After a chorus of a few gasps, it was actually Terasaka who spoke up first. “How did _you two_ make _that_?”

Karma removed himself from the bed. “You see, when two people like each other _very much_ , they-“

“He looks a lot like Karma kun,” Kataoka said matter of factly, thankfully cutting Karma off before he could finish whatever he was going to say.

“But he’s so small, like Nagisa kun,” Maehara said.

Nagisa shifted. “How did you even know he was here, anyway?”

Isogai smiled. “We basically figured it out when neither showed up at school today. Honestly, we nearly managed to assassinate Korosensei today, he was such a nervous wreck.”

Korosensei himself was in the corner of the room, a handkerchief to his eyes. With the noise dying down, his blubbering sobbing noises were obvious. A stream of tears rolled down his yellow cheeks (if you could even really call them cheeks), as he muttered something to himself that was mostly unintelligible. Nagisa hadn’t wanted anybody to _worry_.

Nakamura lunged with her knife, though their ever unkillable teacher still managed to dodge. “Worth a shot.”

“No assassinations in front of our son,” Nagisa said, sterner than he’d meant to.

“Surprisingly cute,” she said, giving Karma some kind of odd look. He returned it, smirking as he did so. Nagisa would never understand their friendship.

Kurahashi sighed. “It seems so weird that you’re parents.” When the others turned to look at her, she cleared her throat. “I mean, it was one thing seeing Nagisa kun all fat and stuff, but now they have an _actual_ baby.”

Maybe Nagisa should have been offended over the ‘fat’ comment, but it was only a minor thing. She was most definitely right. As he was discovering, keeping a baby alive and well inside him was far easier than doing it externally. At least after the first few hours, Daichi still looked good and happy. It had to be a sign that they weren’t doing the worst job ever, surely.

“A-are we allowed hold him?” Kanzaki asked shyly, after the conversation died down a little.

Nagisa didn’t feel so sure, suddenly. It wasn’t that he didn’t trust his classmates, but Daichi was so small and fragile and precious, it was hard to even find the will to pass him over to _Karma_ , let alone everyone else.

“Okay,” he said eventually, knowing he’d have to bite the bullet eventually.

Karma glared. “If any of you come even close to dropping him, I will personally end you.”

“ _Karma_ ,” Nagisa warned, though he couldn’t help but feel kind of happy that Karma was so protective of their son already.

Not everybody wanted to, but a good amount of their friends formed what could only be described as an orderly queue. Nagisa tried his best not to be bothered that they were playing pass the parcel with his son, and focus on the moment instead. Sugino looked incredibly frightened, probably from Karma’s threat, but wore a giddy smile once Daichi was snug in his arms. Similarly, Kayano smiled brightly at her turn, though she seemed more confident in what she was doing.

“Can you even hold him properly, Korosensei?” Kimura asked, once it came to his turn.

“Of course!” Korosensei’s face flashed with its circle to represent correctness. “As Karma kun remembers from one of his first assassination attempts, my tentacles have great suction.”

It felt so _long_ ago.

The moment he was actually holding Daichi, though, he started the crying again. Nagisa still couldn’t understand him, but he hoped it was the good, emotional kind of tears. At least he had multiple tentacles, some he could continue to dry his eyes with. “Little E-29,” he got out.

“Isn’t he a little young for middle school?” Nagisa said, though he didn’t mind.

Karma chuckled lightly. “Hear that? And he’s not even a day old. He’s so smart already.”

Korosensei straightened out somewhat. “On an honorary basis, of course.”

After Daichi had been branded with his unofficial roll call number, he yawned, falling asleep again like that. Using his regular speed, Korosensei deposited him back in Nagisa’s arms, completely unharmed by the experience.

“Bored of us already, huh, Daichan?” Nakamura laughed.

“He’s worn out from all the attention,” Nagisa said.

Now the very tiny reason they’d all come was out of it, everyone quietly made their goodbyes, not wanting to wake him back up again. Once the room was completely clear of them, a happy lull set over Nagisa. He was glad to have the space again, but that had been nice. Recently, the other members of the E Class had become some of the most important people in his life, so it was only right they got to meet the number one _most_ important person.

He was tempted to put Daichi back down in the cot again, feeling a little restless after being stuck still for so long, but he looked so comfy Nagisa decided against it. Every single moment he had Daichi curled up against his chest was the best moment of his life ever, and that was just a fact. Though Daichi seemed to be taking to frequent naps, Karma looked much more alert after only a little bit of rest. Nagisa was still concerned for him, though.

“Hi,” the same nurse who had informed them of their visitors returned again, after knocking on the door. “It’s getting close to the end of visiting hours now, but you have somebody else.”

Well, Nagisa hadn’t been expecting that. “Who?”

“She says she’s your mother.”

A shot of dread went through him. “A-are you sure?”

“Absolutely not,” Karma said, voice completely firm.

The nurse looked them over. “I’ll come back in a few minutes.”

“Nagisa,” Karma said, “that woman threw you out like you were last week’s trash. I don’t think she should be around our son.”

“I know,” Nagisa replied, eyes meeting the floor. He’d truly thought he was dead to her, completely disowned and disregarded. Though of course it had upset him, Nagisa had much bigger issues to deal with, let alone what his mother thought of him. There was no possible explanation for this sudden change of heart, that Nagisa could think of, at least.

“Then we’ll just tell her no,” Karma was apparently satisfied.

Nagisa chewed on his lip for a moment. “There’s no use.”

“Huh?”

“We’re still minors,” Nagisa tried to rationalise. “If she really wants to see him, then she probably can. I-I also kind of want to see what she has to say.”

“I didn’t want to bring it up,” Karma said, “but didn’t she practically _abuse_ you for years?”

Swallowing down his fear, Nagisa tried to think properly. “We’re in a public hospital. She can’t do anything.”

He exhaled dramatically. “If _you_ trust her, then fine.”

“I’m not exactly happy about it,” Nagisa defended.

But fate was decided. When the nurse came back, and they gave her the okay, and then it just became the tense waiting game. Nagisa couldn’t help but hold Daichi a little tighter, protectively, though he knew full well nothing too bad could really happen, even if his mother did get in one of her moods. Eventually, she arrived at the door, closing it behind her, though not taking a step closer.

“Hi, mum,” Nagisa attempted to say as confidently as possible, having not seen his mother for several months. Karma just glared. When she didn’t say anything, he felt obligated to continue. “This is-“

“They’re small,” she said cautiously. “I can tell from here. Smaller than you were, I think.”

Nagisa swallowed. “His name is Daichi. And he’s five pounds six.”

“Hm, only a little smaller. May I?”

He wasn’t about to do a quick analysis. Nagisa studied seemingly every crevice of his mother’s face for sign of bad intent. Practically staring into her very soul, he couldn’t detect any of her subtle or more obvious ticks. Only when he was certain she was in one of her light places, he nodded, letting her come forward. He couldn’t help but cringe still, when she took Daichi out of his hands and held him close to her.

“No need to flash your alpha pheromones at me, Karma kun,” she said nonchalantly. “You should be frightened of _me_ , anyway. Even from the start, I knew you were a bad influence, but getting my underage son pregnant? You show some nerve even looking me in the eye.”

Nagisa felt the atmosphere rise. “It took the both of us,” he defended.

“Yes,” her head turned back to Nagisa, lips pressed tight. “I’m well aware of the mechanics.” Then, something very odd happened. Her expression softened, and she _smiled_. “I’d hoped you’d wait ten or fifteen years more before giving me a grandchild, but… He’s a sweet thing, isn’t he?”

He had no idea what to say. “U-uh, why? Why did you come?”

She sighed. “As I’m sure you’re aware by now, you can’t _un_ love your child, no matter how they might disappoint you, no matter how hard you might try. Perhaps I was wrong, to turn my back on you so quickly. Though you’ve disobeyed my wishes,” she straightened, and handed Daichi back, “you’re still my son, Nagisa.”

What would he have given to hear those words, just a few months ago, before this happened?

“Let me put it this way,” she continued. “I’ve been given leave from work for the next few months, up until the summer. I tried to dispute it, but my superiors insisted. I suppose you can’t fight off suspension due to stress by arguing. I’d like you to come back to me, Nagisa.” She paused. “Your top responsibility, as a parent, is to secure the best possible future for your child. You won’t be able to do that without a high school diploma. So, here’s my proposal. I will take care of your son during the hours you attend school, until he’s old enough for other alternatives. Every moment you’re not at school, he’s entirely your responsibility. People will talk, and there will be shame, but for you, I will put up with it.”

Nagisa’s breath caught, with far too much information to process.

“Of course,” she said, “aside from your taking most of the care and financial burdens yourself, there is one other condition. When you both turn eighteen and are legally able, you’ll get married.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *whistles* Did I mention I like cliffhangers? 
> 
> If you're interested, this is how Daichi's name is spelt, in kanji, hirigana, and romanji:  
> 赤羽 大知  
> あかばね だいち  
> Akabane Daichi 
> 
> Or, if you want the English way, Daichi Akabane
> 
> It's pronounced like 'D-eye-ch-ee'
> 
> Hopefully this is the satisfaction you've all been waiting for, though not even close to the end of this fic. Once again, I appreciate and strongly encourage all of your comments, they're the reason I get these chapters out so fast!


	31. Choice Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nagisa and Karma consider Hiromi's offer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *slides in with a starbucks*

“Married?!” Nagisa couldn’t help but exclaim. “ _Why_?”

“Think about it Nagisa!” His mother raised her voice a little. “Do you  _know_  how illegitimate children get treated?”

He hadn’t thought about that. “It’s not the nineteen hundreds…”

She sighed. “This is the kind of thing you have to think about. Did you even consider how you’d register the child?”

Honestly, he hadn’t got that far in his thoughts for the future. “I- But we don’t  _love_  each other.“

“I’ll be back tomorrow,” she completely dodged. “You’ll have decided by then.”

Thoughts raced through Nagisa’s head at such a high speed he barely noticed her actually leave. Dreadfully, he knew she was right. Or, at least, had some kind of a point. He had to take true responsibility, and that meant… Well, Nagisa wasn’t exactly sure what it meant. Doing the right thing, surely, though Nagisa didn’t know what that was yet.

On the one hand, her offer was a blessing. Though Asano had been nice enough to accommodate him, there was no way that was stretching to a new-born baby. Casually moving in with Karma like he had over the winter break just seemed kind of wrong, like a level of intimacy Nagisa wasn’t ready for yet. Even though that was the best alternate option, there was no way he’d be able to finish compulsory education.

His mother had him pinned. For a moment, Nagisa genuinely considered that a life of homelessness may be better than one with his mother. There was something, though, deep in his instincts, that wanted to believe her. Maybe because she’d looked at Daichi with more affection in her eyes in the space of a few minutes than she’d shown Nagisa in his whole life. The idea of leaving him in her care…

“It’s the best option we have,” Nagisa admitted.

Karma, who had been particularly silent during that exchange, finally seemed to pipe up. “Are you serious?”

He didn’t want to look Karma in the eye, as he said it. “It’s not like I want it. She’s ridiculous. What would _marriage_ achieve?”

“ _That’s_ your problem with this?”

“No!” Nagisa defended. “But it’s just so-“

Karma shrugged. “It’s a piece of paper. The bigger issue is our son’s wellbeing.”

“Maybe she’s changed,” he supplied weakly. “I don’t know Karma. But I do think it’s better than any other option there is. I didn’t sense any kind of bad intent… And I’m the one who had to live with her all my life. Her moods are turbulent, but… She seemed really serious.” 

“You know what,” he exhaled, “I do trust you. Fine. It’s your decision.”

Nagisa knew he couldn’t put it off, like he so badly wanted to. It felt like a small curse. Honestly… Nagisa didn’t want to admit defeat, either, admit that he probably did need his mother. He’d been okay, with sacrificing his childhood and everything else. As his feelings had proved, Daichi was more than worth all of it. It felt like taking a step backwards. Though, Nagisa supposed, it wouldn’t be for that long. Their assassination deadline was in less than a month, and the bounty that came with it. It was traditional, to stay at home with your parents for the first month…

But then he’d have to marry Karma. Though he was right, all it had to be was a piece of paper, Nagisa couldn’t help but find the idea kind of depressing. How long would it even have to last for, twenty years? That was longer than Nagisa had even been alive. Somehow, he didn’t quite feel ready to commit himself to something like that. Maybe it was the right thing, though. This wasn’t about him, or what he wanted.

Would Daichi really be looked down upon, based on the poor decisions of his parents? Nagisa couldn’t imagine anything worse, to screw up his life so soon. It wasn’t like he knew what he was doing for any of this. He really would have to start thinking properly about this, rather than relying on his instincts. Hormones were taking over his brain, though. It was hard to be logical.

“I need to think,” Nagisa said eventually. He swallowed. “You know you’re allowed a say.”

Slumping, Karma didn’t seem too bothered. “In this, I honestly think it’s down to your experience.

“Karma, I-“

Before he could continue the discussion, yet another new nurse entered the room. Unlike the others, she looked a little sterner, disgruntled.

“Visiting hours are nearly over,” she stated.

Nagisa blinked. “He really can’t stay?”

“For _everyone_ ,” she dismissed.

“Who pissed in her cereal?” Karma smirked, knowing full well she was still in earshot, as she was going out the door. “Anyway, what were you saying?”

Perhaps it would be best to just speak what he was feeling. “I-I’m just really happy. Uhm… If you weren’t here with me, I don’t know what it would be like, but I think I’d feel a lot more lost. So, what I’m trying to say is,” Nagisa was rambling, and he knew it. An uncomfortable twinge distracted him, though. “I need the bathroom.” 

Karma studied him. “All of that, because you want help walking to the bathroom? Who knew parenthood would make you so dramatic.”

Sure, Nagisa could stick with that. “Please?”

Actually being stood up wasn’t the worst thing in the world, but the process of getting into that position was something else. Nagisa knew it would just get easier with time, but that didn’t mean it didn’t suck. Turns out, he didn’t have his own body back just yet. He would eventually, right? Surely he wasn’t going to be destroyed forever. He couldn’t believe Daichi was so small, with the toll his body had taken.

Walking was… a challenge, but he barely remembered what walking normally felt like anyway. With less pressure bearing down, Nagisa managed it, with minimal assistance needed. Still, Karma’s hands were a nice guide, making it feel far less daunting. He even opened the bathroom door for him.

“I don’t think getting married would be so bad,” Karma said, once they were inside. “Now I think about it, I don’t mind.”

For a moment, Nagisa completely forgot about his bladder. “I-is this you asking me to marry you?”

“Not really, but-“

“In a bathroom, no less,” he complained. “You couldn’t have waited five more minutes?”

Karma didn’t seem bothered. “You’re alright from here, right?”

“I’ll manage,” Nagisa said. Once Karma left the room, he sighed, though managed to relieve himself without much issue.

And then he caught sight of himself in the mirror. He looked a _mess_. Sure, Nagisa hadn’t been expecting to just pop a baby out and go back to exactly how he looked before, but he still looked pregnant, or else just fat. Not as big as he did before, but still. He also had gigantic bags under his eyes, and looked like he could collapse from the plague at any moment. Honestly, he was surprised Karma had yet to tease him about it.

Shuffling back into the recovery room, Nagisa found Karma in his own little world. He was sat on the visitors chair, holding Daichi to his chest gently. Honestly, Nagisa thought he could fall asleep like that, if left to it. There was this soft smile on Karma’s face, an expression Nagisa hadn’t really ever seen from him before. He almost wanted to go and join the comfort.

“Did he wake up?” Nagisa asked eventually.

Karma looked up. “Yeah, for a minute. He’s sleeping again now.”

“Well,” Nagisa said, “it’s been a big day for him. You look just as tired.”

“I’m _fine_ ,” he tried, moving to put Daichi back down.

“Karma… Maybe you should go back home.” As much as Nagisa hated that idea. “You need to get some rest.”

It seemed like some rare things really were going on that day, because Karma sighed and nodded. “Okay, but… I’ll be back tomorrow.” Very quickly and gently, he rubbed his thumb across the rough location of Daichi’s hand (considering he was all swaddled up), before moving closer to Nagisa. Before Nagisa really knew what was happening, Karma leaned down, pressing his lips to his forehead. “Bye.”

Stunned, Nagisa didn’t say goodbye back. Had that really even happened? The pressure of his lips had been so light he could barely feel it, yet its ghost still lingered. Like a red hot brand, his kiss seemed to burn into his forehead. Struck dumb, Nagisa just stood there, embarrassingly flushing. What was Karma even playing at?

He needed to pull himself together.

Unfortunately, it was hard to do that. Daichi was fast asleep, so Nagisa didn’t want to disturb him. There was nothing to amuse himself with, that wouldn’t create noise. He had only his own thoughts, and currently, Karma occupied most of them. Hopefully it would all pass in the space of a day, because no way could Nagisa hold a conversation otherwise. At least he had the ‘fun’ challenge of getting back down into bed.

Eventually, the same, grumpy nurse came back in again. Nagisa didn’t really know what she was there for, but he was almost glad to have another person to interact with.

“I’m going to take him back to the nursery now,” she explained.

Immediately, Nagisa’s heart jumped up in his throat. “W-why?”

“Because,” she said, “that’s the policy here for patients who need a bit of extra care. Due to your age, and everything.”

If Nagisa was more of a naturally confrontational person, perhaps he would have argued with her more. Unfortunately, he’d probably shy away from a praying mantis if it looked threatening enough, so Nagisa kept his lips pressed tight. He couldn’t help but feel annoyed though, he could still take care of his baby as well as anybody else.

“The toll on your body is simply different,” she added. “You’ll see him again first thing in the morning.”

Well, he knew when to pick his battles. “Goodnight, Daichi,” he said, before he was wheeled away.

The moment that door closed, Nagisa went straight back to wondering if this was all some weirdly vivid dream. Without Daichi in his literal sightline, the only real reminder he had was the soreness of his body. He felt a little bad for it, but Nagisa was too tired to really be worried. Soon, the most logical thing to do, sleep, took over.

When he woke up again, it was to a new nurse wheeling Daichi back in again. Nagisa supposed it hadn’t been the worst thing in the world, then. In fact, a brand new wave of energy rolled over him. Instead of being worn out, he was refreshed, ready for anything. Though the soreness was still very present, it didn’t bother him much. There were more important things.

It had been just over a full day since Daichi was born. Now that Nagisa had had some time to breathe, the rest of his life began. He was determined to be the best parent he possibly could. It just felt like the right moment to start. So, after Daichi was in his care, and he’d consumed the hospital supplied breakfast, Nagisa pulled himself to his feet, ready to go.

Then again, despite his commitment, Nagisa didn’t know exactly where to start. He picked Daichi up, studying the way he looked up at him, slowly blinking. Being a day old, Daichi really didn’t seem to do much. Nagisa didn’t mind that, he supposed. He was sure he’d mourn these days, in the future. Well, the least Nagisa could do was walk around a little. It had to be boring, staring up at the same thing all day.

Nagisa wasn’t sure if Daichi actually noticed the difference or not, but he certainly seemed more awake than he had the day before. When he needed feeding, he seemed to fuss a little more too, squirming and opening his little gummy mouth wide. It felt somehow harder, without Karma there with him. Nagisa managed though, or at least, he felt like he was. Daichi seemed happy enough. He realised, then, his feelings hadn’t just been heat of the moment. He really did love this child, with all that he was.

When visiting hours finally opened up, Nagisa was half surprised that Karma wasn’t already in the room again within seconds. He wasn’t bothered, though, electing to hope that Karma was sleeping or something. Magically, Nagisa’s burst of energy had lasted, enough that he was in such a good mood nothing could irritate him, even with the knowledge his mother would been visiting later.

In fact, Nagisa’s first visitor that day turned out to be his own father. It took him by surprise, when the nurse had warned him of it. Ever since they got sushi that day, Nagisa hadn’t heard anything from him. That didn’t matter, though. Nagisa didn’t expect to hear much, just like usual. He’d just taken his father’s indifference as silent disapproval, and left it alone.

“Hi, dad,” Nagisa said, once his father had entered the room. He’d decided to sit down on the hospital bed, rather than walk around freely as he had been.

Keeping a somewhat cautious distance, his father remained next to the door. “A-are you well?”

Nagisa swallowed. “Yeah, I’m all good… Do you, uhm,” he didn’t know the right thing to say. “Do you want to come closer?”

He took tentative steps towards them. Helping the situation along a little, Nagisa held Daichi up. “I-“

“We named him Daichi,” Nagisa explained. Though his father didn’t ask, Nagisa sensed what he wanted. It wasn’t so hard to hand Daichi over, that time. His father was ready to respond, though looked slightly hesitant as he took Dachi into his arms.

“I think I owe you an apology,” he said. “The indifference I showed before… That was wrong of me. I was shocked.”

“That’s okay,” Nagisa replied. Honestly, it hadn’t really stuck with him that much.

His father nodded. “Nagisa, I can’t say I’m happy about this. I suppose I should be angry or disappointed, but I fear I lost that right long ago. Really, your mother and I can only blame ourselves. How could we assume you’d manage to lead a normal life, with only us for example? Things should’ve been different.”

“But then I wouldn’t have _him_ ,” Nagisa said, trying to shed some of the weight of his father’s words. He pulled himself to his feet, taking Daichi back. “And I wouldn’t trade him for anything.”  

Flashing a sad smile, his father sighed. “I still remember the day you were born. Though I was terrified, when I held you for the first time I was just so excited. I’d never imagined being a parent, before that.” He paused. “I always thought you were smarter than you come across… I at least hope this isn’t on a whim, that you’ve thought this through.”

“Karma and I,” Nagisa started carefully, “we’re going to take care of him.”

“Karma?” His father questioned. “Is that…” like it physically pained him, his features clenched, “your _boyfriend_?”

He couldn’t help but turn away, breaking eye contact. “Not quite.”

“Well,” he said, “I’ll see you, then?”

“Sure,” Nagisa replied, not wanting to drag the awkward conversation out much further.

After that, his father let himself out, drawing their brief meeting to a close. He wasn’t sure how to feel about all of that, or what it _meant_. Mostly, Nagisa had done just fine without his father a constant feature in his life, he didn’t desperately need a change. It was a stark contrast to how Nagisa would have felt about this months ago.

It mellowed him out a little, but Nagisa was still in a pretty good mood. He had more important things to think about, anyway. Mostly, it felt like being a little bubble, where the real issues he’d have to strongly consider weren’t hitting him. He knew there was no way this could sustainably last, but it didn’t seem to bother him.

“Yo,” Karma said, when he finally showed up. “How’s Tiny?”

Nagisa had had to put him down for a while, after his father left. “Napping.”

Of all the things to undo his light mood, it was odd that it would Karma. He looked a lot better than he had yesterday, now that he’d had some rest. Perhaps because he was afraid Karma might do something again, Nagisa couldn’t help but stare at his lips. They’d been weirdly soft, against any kind of expectation. Just from looking at them, it wasn’t like they were shiny with gloss or balm or anything (not that Nagisa could imagine Karma wearing that, ever). Wow, Nagisa needed to stop staring at his lips.

“I bought sushi,” he said, pulling a pack out from his backpack. “As promised.”

It took Nagisa a moment to place what he meant, before he realised. He barely remembered the last parts of labour, but Karma _had_ said something about sushi. “Oh! Thanks for the food,” he said politely, taking it from him and immediately tucking in. “Is this allowed?”

He shrugged. “Sure it is.”

Though it probably wasn’t, Nagisa didn’t really care. He hadn’t really been able to eat his favourite food for months, so it was incredibly satisfying to have it again. If he couldn’t have his body back just yet, at least he could have that. Without Daichi doing much to occupy Karma’s attention, they were left to themselves.

“Nagisa-“

“I’m going to try and get discharged today,” Nagisa cut him off. He was frightened of what Karma might say, whether he’d bring ‘it’ up.

He blinked. “Don’t they usually keep you for a week with this kind of thing?”

“Yeah…” Nagisa sighed. “But the entrance exams are tomorrow.”

“You’re going to _take_ those?” Though Karma’s expression and tone didn’t express much shock, Nagisa could tell it was there.

“It’s not like I have a choice,” he said. “I’ll just have to get through it.”

Karma tilted his head. “You had a baby _yesterday._ ” Apparently he didn’t want an argument, though. “You’ve made your choice then.”  

“It’s the best option we have,” Nagisa said. “Uhm, I know you said it was up to me, but-“

Grinning, Karma waved him off. “Don’t worry, I have it covered.” Nagisa was very, very afraid of whatever that meant. “Say, if you wanted to take Daichi home today, don’t we need clothes or something?”

“I-I didn’t even think of that.” Wow, Nagisa’s good parenting mission wasn’t going as smoothly as he’d hoped.

Karma didn’t seem bothered. “I’ll be back soon.”

He was gone, before Nagisa even had a chance to question it. He did trust that Karma knew what he was doing, though. Looking over at Daichi, who was tucked in the crib, still oblivious. Nagisa couldn’t help but wonder if Karma’s senses were naturally better than his. Still, he felt calm as he looked over at his son. At least _he_ didn’t have to worry about any of this.

“What’s _that_?” Nagisa let out, when Karma returned.

In his hands was a monstrosity. It was clearly a baby sleep suit, but unlike anything with a cute pattern, it was gaudy. Mostly white otherwise, some cheap looking print was stuck on the front. It read ‘I heart Tokyo’, though the heart was an actual red coloured heart. Exactly the kind of thing an obnoxious foreigner would buy as a souvenir, it wasn’t exactly what Nagisa had envisioned dressing Daichi in ever.

“Clothes,” he said, cheerfully.

Nagisa cringed. “You’re going to force Daichi to wear that? Whilst he’s so defenceless?”

“It was the only thing they had in the gift shop,” Karma shrugged.

“Great,” Nagisa said, eyeing the garment, “now he’s going to look like a tourist.”

Stretching out, Karma shook his head. “He’ll look _cute_. They had a bunch of different colours, but we don’t know what his fashion sense is yet, so I just went for plain. It only cost me three thousand yen.”

“Three. Thousand. Yen. You spent three thousand on _that_?”

“Lighten up,” Karma nudged him. “Look, he loves it.”

To be honest, Daichi looked completely apathetic, but Nagisa decided not to tell Karma that. He decided it would be best to just accept it. Karma could make half the fashion decisions, he supposed. After he got out of the hospital, he was definitely buying something better, something that would suit him. Not that Daichi would ever look less than the most beautiful baby in the world, of course.

Nagisa swallowed. “We need to go and buy him actual things. Not just from gift shops.”

“How about tomorrow,” Karma suggested. “After your exam.”

He nodded. How did he end up here, again? How on earth did he _ever_ fall into a conversation about baby shopping with Karma? This had been the weirdest year of his life, without a doubt. It was, also, absolutely the best.  

Until, naturally, a nurse came in to announce his mother was in reception. This time, Nagisa remembered to steel himself. He was going to accept her offer, so he hoped it would keep her happy. That didn’t mean her presence didn’t intimidate him, though. It still felt kind of like losing, submitting once again to whatever she wanted for him. Nagisa would accept it, though, given what he’d probably put her through.

“So,” she said immediately upon entry, as if she’d never left, “have you made your decision?”

Nagisa gulped. There he was, about to sign his entire life away to his mother’s will. But then, looking at Daichi sleeping peacefully, Nagisa had no regrets. If it was for him, anything.

Karma kept his gaze low. “How about a counter offer?”

Oh _no_. Though Karma hadn’t really seen much of his mother, definitely not the more hysterical sides to her, he had to know what he was getting in to, arguing with her. Then again, Karma always was the type to play with fire. Nagisa didn’t see this going over too well, not at all. His eyes darted between the two of them, hastily trying to figure out a way to defuse this before something went really wrong.

At her glare, Karma decided to just continue. He reached into his bag, and pulled out some paperwork. “Intent Of Bond forms.”

“That’s _archaic_ ,” Nagisa couldn’t help but let out. “I- that’s still a thing?!”

Intent Of Bond was the kind of thing he learnt about in history lessons. Back when alphas and omegas were the majority secondary genders, and there was no real need for bonding. The exact dates of it escaped his memory, considering it wasn’t really the area of history that was studied in school. Bonding was permanent, a mark that would _never_ go away, unlike the rings and words of marriage.  

He thought it had something to do with a beta falling into a position of power. With no option to mate, something betas couldn’t biologically do, the concept of marriage was popularised. It was a beta thing, mostly, but the fact that it could be undone meant it had appeal. As far as Nagisa knew, it just took over, and bonding became less.

The only reason he even knew about Intent Of Bond was because it caused a massive drama at one point in Europe, though they didn’t learn much European history at all. Only basic concepts. It was invented as an answer to marriage, a ‘trial’ period much like marriage, that could be written off after time passed if no bond actually happened. Children born from it still counted as legitimate, in many places. Different versions of the law existed, he knew, and some countries had abolished it all together. Japan, it seemed, still had it, though Nagisa rarely came across it. That didn’t surprise Nagisa, considering how slow the country he lived in was to update itself.

Karma looked his mother dead in the eye. “It’s a loophole, better than marriage. Me and Nagisa can sign these, register right away, and Daichi won’t be treated any different. The family register would look just the same as a married couple. It’s less messy than marriage, and, when it times out in ten years, it’ll just be like we got a divorce without actually doing anything.”

“But you’d _own_ me,” Nagisa said. “I’d be your legal property.”

His eyes flicked to Nagisa. “Don’t you trust me enough to not take advantage of that? It’s only a piece of paper.”

Nagisa did. He trusted Karma with his life, honestly, but… It made him uncomfortable. Being an omega was bad enough as it _was_. But he had to really weigh this up. Karma was right, this was less permanent than marriage. It wasn’t like he was ever going to actually bond with Karma. Unless he wanted to get married to somebody else by twenty five (not likely), Nagisa couldn’t think of another way it would actually affect him.

“I’m a presented alpha,” Karma said, “so I’m fine. But Nagisa needs consent.” He held gazes with Nagisa’s mother. “You are, legally, his sole guardian, right?”

Of course she was, after the divorce. She swallowed. “Hand me the papers.”

Perhaps Nagisa should have been more upset that she was so willing to sign him away, but it wasn’t worth it. Without much care, she signed her name, and then passed the paper to him. Once, he’d heard that he should read everything he signed, but he didn’t see much point. Hand clenching around the pen, he shook. With just a few lines, he’d be giving himself away. He and Karma would be _engaged_ , or, more than engaged, really. But this was for Daichi’s good.

Just on the dotted line, he drew the same strokes he’d been writing since he was old enough to hold a pen. With his name just across from Karma’s, the deed was done.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some world building in this one! 
> 
> So they're like... KIND OF married, heh. 
> 
> I can't believe I made you wait, like, over 100k words for a forehead kiss :') Get used to this. 
> 
> As always, I love to see such great response to my writing. I'm so stoked you guys all loved the last chapter so much, I hope you enjoyed this one, too. I appreciate all feedback!


	32. Shopping Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nagisa's finally allowed to take Daichi (and himself) home from hospital, just in time for his entrance exams.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took a bit longer than usual! I've been busy this week, staring a new job and stuff. Hope you enjoy this fluff bomb!

Standing in his bedroom again felt like he’d entered another plane of reality. So much had happened since the last time he saw it, yet it was almost as if he’d never even left. Of course, Nagisa _knew_ he had, the physical evidence of that was squirming in his arms. It still felt like foreign territory, though. How many times had he hidden away up there, when he was younger? Though it wasn’t exactly the bedroom of his childhood, he’d left that behind after his parents’ divorce, it was close enough.

Nagisa was no longer the kid he’d been when he left this place. Or, at least, he _couldn’t_ be. He was honestly surprised the hospital had even allowed him to go home so soon, though he supposed with the combined argumentative and wit powers of his mother and Karma, they hadn’t had much of a choice. Not that it had helped him, much. All his books were at Asano’s house, so he hadn’t studied, or slept for more than a few naps. Plus, Daichi was wearing that hideous outfit, and it hurt his eyes to look at it.

His phone buzzed again, though Nagisa tried not to be annoyed about it. That, sending him home, was the deal he’d made with Karma, at least, so _one_ of them could get some sleep. Naturally, he’d promised he’d let Karma know any updates as they came. It _hadn’t_ meant that Karma should text him at least once every half hour, like he was doing. Though, this meant Nagisa’s entire camera roll now was just Daichi sleeping from different angles, in slightly altering lighting.

Nagisa really couldn’t stand there any longer. It was time to bite the bullet. Leaving his bedroom, which he had to be careful about, trying to open a door with a baby in his arms was a little challenging, Nagisa stepped out into the hallway. He wasn’t exactly worried about the entrance exams, after everything. Perhaps he should have been, but it honestly seemed pretty insignificant.

He’d try his best, though, for Daichi’s sake.

“I have to leave now,” Nagisa plucked up the courage to say.        

His mother turned from where she was sat at the kitchen table, halfway through her coffee mug, “Take a bottle of water,” she said, “it’s good for the brain.”

Had Nagisa missed this? It wasn’t like his mother _hadn’t_ cared for him, before everything. Of course there had been her _moods_ , but other than that... It wasn’t so bad. Though, there was no way anything could revert exactly back to the way it had been. He still didn’t regret a single thing, though.

“Thanks,” he said, stepping over to the fridge. Daichi decided to co-operate with him, not really moving as Nagisa opened the door with his free hand. “Uhm, Karma and I are going shopping later, after the exam.”  

He didn’t know why he’d held his breath, because his mother just nodded. “You always need more than you think you do.”

It was time, then. He stepped closer to his mother, slipping his arms a little differently so he could support Daichi’s head, in preparation to hand him over. Tensing only a little, it wasn’t as hard as he thought it would be to let his mother take him. Daichi didn’t seem to care in the slightest, blinking once before shutting his eyes in sleep.

“Do you-“

She sighed. “Nagisa, he’s in good hands.”

Swallowing, he tried to remember that. “Right. Bye, then.”

“Don’t stay out too long with Akabane kun.”

Nagisa didn’t respond to her, instead picking up one of his larger coats and leaving out the door, once he’d made sure he had everything. With the bulkiness of the clothing, he was managing to pull off the ‘just overweight’ look once again. It also meant, when he got to the train, that nobody immediately moved for his sake anymore. Honestly, Nagisa didn’t want to go through the process of sitting down and standing back up again, so he didn’t mind.

Finally, once he was truly on his way to Keisetsu High School, which was a pretty long journey out of Kunugigaoka, Nagisa finally pulled out his phone. Karma hadn’t actually spammed up his messages, at least. He found himself smiling, before tapping out his reply.

Of course. Though Nagisa had already left, he’d taken a couple, before getting all his stuff together. Karma could be predictable, sometimes. Looking down at the photos, his heart swelled. He’d never thought he’d actually _miss_ being pregnant, but it was really kind of weird, not being able to feel his baby moving around in him all the time. The photos were a decent replacement, he supposed. 

Well, Nagisa hadn’t needed or expected much else. It was kind of funny, really, how brief Karma was over text. He never said anything he didn’t need to, at least in texts to Nagisa. Typically, in their class group chat, his language was much more proper. Secretly, Nagisa hoped that just meant that he was comfortable around him, even virtually, rather than anything else.

Even having signed that paper work the day before, Nagisa realised nothing was that different. Being _basically_ engaged to Karma… It was just a technicality in his life. Perhaps because Nagisa knew exactly how it would end, completely written off legally in only a decade, it didn’t hold the same impact as actual marriage or anything would. There was no chance they’d actually bond ever, so admittedly, Karma was right. It was just a piece of paper.

Nagisa could survive until the afternoon, hopefully, if he didn’t combust in the middle of the exam.  That was still very much a possibility. Though, after all he’d been through, he was sure he could pull through till the end. Once he arrived at the school, he couldn’t stop his hand from shaking, as he looked down at his examination ticket. Nobody else amongst those making their way to the entrance seemed as worried. Then again, Keisestsu was a _good_ school, they were all probably far more prepared. Until he heard a commotion.

“Go, go, Nagisa!” Korosensei, or, _multiple_ of his clones were screaming.

“W-what the heck are you doing, Korosensei?!” Nagisa got out. He looked around nervously, hoping nobody had noticed it was for _him_. Doubtful.

He continued speeding up and down the street. “Cheering you on, of course! How could I not be there for my dear student’s big moment? Yikes! Is that the time?! I’ve got to pop in on Kimura, Kanzaki, Chiba, Hayami, and Hara – all within the next four minutes!” 

Before Nagisa could formulate a response to that, he sped off, breaking out into Mach 20 and flying off into the sky. It was almost funny to watch, Korosensei had become much more lax with the whole ‘national secret’ thing recently. At least most people had already gone inside the hall to take their exams. Nagisa just kept his head down and entered the building, though he did feel slightly better with Korosensei’s support.

He’d never be like that. Recently, Nagisa had been thinking a lot about his future. After tutoring Sakura for so long, he thought maybe he’d like to be a teacher _too_ , some day. It was a good, stable career, after all, over assassination, anyway. And Nagisa wanted to inspire people, just like Korosensei had inspired him. Without the E Class, he probably wouldn’t be half the person he’d become. If he could even capture a bit of that…

Nagisa swallowed. Korosensei just seemed to care so much about all of them, went out of his way to support them constantly through anything. There was no way he could match that… Though, there was nothing else that Nagisa wanted to be. Now he’d thought of it as a possibility, it was the only thing that stuck with him. Well, he still had around a week left to decide.

Standing up as straight as he could, tough with his change in centre of gravity, Nagisa signed himself in. He’d made it, with time to spare. The sight of the wooden chairs and desks brought on phantom pain before he’d even sat down, but he forced himself to just take another deep breath. After _surviving_ child birth, the pain would be comparatively minimal, he reminded himself. He still winced, though, as he reached for his pen and began signing his name on the paper.

“Alright,” the examiner said eventually, “you may begin.”

He flipped the page, and began to write. Considering he’d been through the Kunugigaoka Junior High final exams, some of these questions felt _basic_. As if his pen became a sword in its own right, Nagisa sliced through the questions as they came. He hadn’t need to cram, he realised, after he noticed he was halfway through his English paper already. There were some things that escaped his memory, but he made logical guesses for all of them. You couldn’t have points _deducted_ , of course.

Like always, science gave him a bit of trouble. Nagisa had improved a lot, from being completely clueless like at the start of the school year, though, especially without studying, there were definite cracks in his knowledge. Applying some of the strategies Korosensei had drilled into him, he decided to fly through the paper, answering all the questions he definitely knew the answers to, and then going back to tackle the trickier ones. ‘NMR’. _NMR_ … Nagisa had definitely seen that somewhere, before. Wracking his memory, he finally recalled that book Asano had loaned him, before their assassination trip. Smiling to himself, Nagisa recalled one of the first chapters he’d read, and managed to answer the question.

He’d become like a machine, somehow. By the time a lunch break was called, Nagisa was completely fired up. He almost didn’t _want_ it to be lunch break, whilst he had the energy. Still, he pulled himself out of his seat, following everyone else out of the room. Tears stung the corners of his eyes, as he stood up and the adrenaline faded. His entire lower half was on _fire_.

Nagisa just had to grit his teeth, too pained to even think about eating. He had to focus, though, to just stick this out till the final exams. This breathing thing he’d learnt due to the contractions sure was coming in handy... Sure the pain wasn’t blinding him, he took sips from the water his mother had reminded him to take, finding he felt a little better.

Though he was still on fire for the second portion of exams, they weren’t awful. Nagisa felt sure that he could do this, and possibly get a good mark. He’d come fourteenth in his year, completely legitimately, and he knew he shouldn’t forget that. People, specifically one tiny person, were depending on it. Before he knew it, he was putting his pen down, with twenty minutes left in his last exam for the day.

It kind of felt like a strange fever dream. Once time was called, and Nagisa was allowed to leave, his mind completely flipped over to the mental list of baby supplies he needed to get. Perhaps it should have been more bizarre, how quickly he seemed to go from ‘schoolboy’ to ‘parent’, but this was his reality, now. This was the agreement he’d made, with his mother. School during the day, so he’d actually be able to take care of Daichi properly in the future, and then all his other responsibilities. Somewhere in the mix; assassination.

Just as promised, Karma was waiting at the entrance of the train station for him. He looked definitively better, up to his usual strength. It made Nagisa feel better, though, rather than jealous. Though he knew he’d get there eventually, he _was_ having to limp with every other step. At least they had a month, before their assassination deadline. _Hopefully_ , it would be enough time for his body to go back to normal.

“Yo,” he said, as Nagisa approached. “How was the exam?”

Nagisa smiled. “Exhausting, but… I hope I did well.”

“’Course you did,” Karma shrugged. “So, shopping?”

“Mmm,” he agreed. “I- I thought maybe we should try the department store, first.”

Nodding in agreement, Karma began to walk, though he kept his pace slow. “It’s probably easiest to get everything in one shot.”

There was one disadvantage to his plan, though. Being the commuter town it was, Kunugigaoka didn’t have much in the way of shopping. There was exactly _one_ department store in the town, and not only was it incredibly expensive, but it was giant. Standing there, right in the shop entrance, Nagisa had no idea where to even _start_.

Karma had already jumped on the elevator, though, which seemed like a pretty good idea. Glancing at one of the signs on the way up, Nagisa realised it did indeed direct that baby things were on the top floor. The floors in between only had a few people shopping, yet for some reason the top was full of people. He supposed people did have babies, all year round.

“Woah,” Karma said, immediately stepping over to the clothes, “Nagisa, look at this!”

Admittedly, it was adorable. On one of the first hangers at his eye level, there was a tiny little super hero suit. Its bright colours and chest logo weren’t the best part, though. The back had a detachable cape, which although would end up being a practical nightmare, made the look. He looked through the hangers, though the only ones available seemed to be six months plus.

“It’ll be too big,” he said, mournfully.

Karma picked it up, regardless. “He’ll grow.”

They did steer towards the new born section, though. Everything was just as adorable, if not more so. There was far too much choice still, though. Nagisa immediately wanted to buy all of it. He supposed it wasn’t like Daichi cared what he was wearing, or would even remember it… This would get a lot easier, when he was older. At least then, Nagisa would be able to narrow it down to favourite colours and patterns.

“How about these?” Karma picked up a miniature pair of shoes.

Just looking at them, Nagisa wanted to burst into tears. “He’s not going to be walking anywhere, for ages,” he let his logic speak. The shoes were impossibly small, though, looking at them closely, he was certain they’d swallow Daichi’s even tinier feet.

Predictably, they made their way into the pile, regardless of Nagisa’s opinion. They were so cute, he didn’t mind it, though. Maybe they’d even help to keep his feet warm. Well, that was enough justification. Nagisa tried to think about it _properly_. Honestly, all Daichi really did was sleep at the moment. Though he knew that would change, right then at least, it was probably alright to get mainly sleep suits.

Having gone through the struggle of putting that stupid onesie on Daichi back at the hospital, Nagisa immediately disregarded everything that didn’t have buttons. Nagisa got it, he’d probably hate someone forcing his head through that thing too, if he didn’t understand what was happening. He ended up picking up the more basic designs, though they were all _very_ cute.

“ _Nagisa_ ~” Karma tugged on his sleeve. “I’m not taking no for an answer.”

The item Karma was holding, a bright red, short sleeved jumpsuit with a matching strawberry patterned hat, was ugly for sure, but the kind of ugly that was also kind of sweet. If Daichi ever saw the inevitable photos of himself as a baby, far in the future, he’d probably end up hating him and Karma both.

He tried to resist. “It’s a bit-“

“I picked it up in the bigger _size_ ~” Karma continued. “In summer, it’s gonna be a perfect fit.”

“We need to get a coat or something,” he said, silently allowing Karma to keep the item. “It’s really cold out.”

It didn’t take long, given the season, to find what was more of a snowsuit, and a bunch of hats. Nagisa wasn’t sure if they’d be taking Daichi out that many places, as winter turned to spring, but it was probably better to be prepared, than not. With that, a bunch of outfits for at least the first three months of Daichi’s life (plus a few for later), the ‘fun’ part was mostly over.

The rest of it was completely overwhelming. Sure, Nagisa knew very basic necessary items, but there were a bunch of products he’d never even _heard_ of. Who knew babies needed so much… Though he figured a lot of it probably wasn’t necessary. Some things, at least, were easy enough, like blankets and a towel, along with baby was and shampoo (though Daichi didn’t have much hair at all, only a few sparse dark wisps). And then they came to the crib section.

“Is one of these better than the others?” Nagisa voiced aloud, stunned by the variety.

Karma shrugged. “Different kinds of wood?”

“Then it wouldn’t be wrong to just get the cheapest one?”

Meeting his eyes, Karma began to grin. Nagisa couldn’t help but copy his expression, almost laughing. Honestly, the fact that they were even discussing cribs together was still ridiculous to him. Instinctively reacting to Karma’s slight movement, Nagisa met him in a high five, self applause for quickly making a decision.

Because they’d have to ask a staff member to get one for them, Nagisa just noted down its name. A few other items were easy enough to get. They ended up with a nappy bag (a bit of a depressing grey colour, but it was the only one without flowers), a changing mat (considering there was no way a gigantic table would fit in his room), and what seemed like an endless supply of bottles and dummies. He had no idea where he was even going to put any of this stuff.

The last hurdle was the pram and pushchair section. Though he didn’t know where exactly he’d be taking Daichi, it seemed like one of those things he should own anyway. He was kind of amused at the way they were all lined up, like the start of a race or something.

Straight away, Karma pulled one of them. “Hey, this one says it converts into a normal pushchair. Let’s get this one, convenient, right?”

Nagisa knew, deep down, that it was probably because Karma couldn’t be bothered to go through this major shopping experience again, any time in the near future, but he was right. Frankly, Nagisa wasn’t built for extended shopping trips.

“Okay, let’s get it.”

Happy to finally be approaching the till, after they’d received a self-construct crib, Nagisa’s arms were starting to ache under the weight of everything. The cashier shot them both an odd yet somewhat disapproving look, but didn’t say anything before she started scanning their collection. Nagisa panted, now free of the weight.

“That comes to 191,300 yen,” the woman said.

Nagisa almost collapsed, right there and then. He was going to have to sell a kidney or something. He’d been thinking maybe fifteen thousand, at a push. The receipt, having auto-printed, was so long it was like something out of a comedy sketch. Had they gone overboard, or something? Honestly, Nagisa had turned his eyes away from a _lot_ of the things they’d walked past.

Like it was casual, Karma handed over a card. “You can put it all on this.”

He knew better than to say anything, right there and then, but Nagisa had many, many questions about that. Surprisingly, the card was accepted without a problem. He just hopped Karma hadn’t stolen it, or something worse. Using the fact that they’d purchased a pram to their advantage, it turned out to be great mobile storage. Being the stronger one, Karma took the crib box.

“ _What_?” Karma said, when they were finally outside again.

Nagisa tested out pushing the pram forwards, weighted down with everything. “Where did you get that?”

He shrugged. “My parents left it with me.”

“They won’t _mind_?”

“Well, yeah,” he said, “they said it was for emergencies, but I figure Daichi counts.”

It still didn’t sit quite right. They weren’t even _done_ yet. Though, they only popped into a regular corner store, far less daunting than the labyrinth they’d just come from. The problem there wasn’t necessarily _what_ to get, but more ‘how much’. He figured this kind of thing, formula, wipes, and nappies, would be pretty easy to get whenever he needed it.

Regardless of that, he found himself with his arms completely full, by the time they were done. The two of them probably looked ridiculous, walking around with everything, plus their mass purchase of three different types of item, accompanied by the soda Karma had apparently picked up. The total was a lot less, though.

As first baby shopping trips went, Nagisa supposed he’d done quite well. Hopefully, Daichi wouldn’t be needing much else, until he was a little bigger. At least he’d been the voice of reason when it came to things like toys, of which they’d only picked up a couple. It was probably better to have more than he needed, than less, however.

There was a slight logistical problem they hadn’t considered about Nagisa’s apartment complex. There wasn’t actually any kind of elevator, just flights upon flights of stairs. Usually, Nagisa had no complaints about it, but he was pushing an incredibly full pram, and Karma’s arms were full. By the time they made it to his floor, Nagisa was about ready to collapse, and even Karma was panting slightly under the strain.

He felt happy to ring the doorbell really, so at least he could go nap or something. Immediately, Nagisa remembered that he had a baby now, and there would be no nap or sleep of any other kind. Somehow, he still wasn’t mad about it. His mother opened the door, after a few seconds, holding a tired looking Daichi.

“Did the exam go well?” She said, as they both entered.

Nagisa nodded. “I think it did.”

His heart swelled, as Daichi started blinking, clearly attempting to focus on Nagisa’s face, though his eyes weren’t developed enough to see so far away yet. Though he’d been distracted all day, everything came flooding in at once. He’d really missed him, even if it was just skirting under the surface. Nagisa dreaded having to leave him for school each day, if this was how he felt.

“Hey Tiny,” Karma said, moving to take him, as he apparently forgot the rest of the bags.

Daichi opened his eyes a little wider, definitely watching the way Karma spoke to him. His tiny little arms broke free from the blanket, waving around a little under the attention. Karma just smiled at him, slipping his finger up so he’d have something to grab onto.

“I think we have enough stuff,” Nagisa said to his mother.

She looked over at it, taking up most of the hallway. “Just keep it tidy.”

He’d try his best. “We’re going to have to build the crib.”

“Fine,” she sighed, “I’ll call you for dinner.”

Nagisa wouldn’t ordinarily feel the need to repeat that information to Karma, but he looked so engrossed in his little bubble, Nagisa was sure it would be necessary. He rocked Daichi around slightly, though not violently enough to bother him, like he’d somehow been doing this for years. Quickly, Nagisa snapped his gaze away and picked up the bags. He couldn’t allow himself to go there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is this straight up the fluffiest chapter yet? I can't decide. I kind of cheated on the LINE screenshots, but I don't have any artistic talent really, unless you want to picture Daichi as a stick figure :') Anybody who wants to is more than welcome, though! 
> 
> Once again, thank you all for your lovely comments, they motivate me a lot!


	33. Nap Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nagisa discovers the true reality of caring for a new born

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is good amounts of fluff and angst

Never in his life had Nagisa been so thankful for his special forces training. He was sure, as he took a few cautious steps back, that he made absolutely zero noise. In fact, he was confident he was silent as ever. It took a lot of will to not show his joy at that, finally stretching out a little. He was ridiculously tired. The constant feeding and getting up in the middle of the night was wearing him down, for sure, but it wasn’t as bad as the _crying_.

For some reason, Daichi had been doing nothing _but_ that, for hours. Nagisa had no clue what was wrong with him, either. He’d hardly cried at all in the few days they’d been home from the hospital, so this was an unwelcome change. Though Nagisa had heard people say that babies just needed to be left to ‘cry it out’, the concept felt awful to him. Perhaps it was some instinctual thing, or Nagisa just felt bad. He was sure that if he didn’t know any other way of communicating, he’d probably cry a lot too.

It would help if Daichi could just tell him what he wanted, though, rather than leaving Nagisa to guess. He’d basically gone through everything he could think of, though. There was no chance he was hungry, he’d moved his head away when Nagisa had tried, and he wasn’t about the _force_ it down his throat. He didn’t need changing, though Nagisa had done that just in case. He’d tried putting him down swaddled up, just in a sleep suit, even holding him… nada.

Following the trend of the day, even though Nagisa had been quiet, the few seconds of silence Daichi had blessed him with were over the second Nagisa wasn’t out of his immediate view, though being held hadn’t made much of a difference either. If this went on any longer, _Nagisa_ was going to start crying, too.

He picked Daichi up again, though he didn’t immediately calm. “Please stop?” He tried, rocking Daichi gently as he did so, knowing the request was completely useless.  There was no way he wouldn’t just pass out from exhaustion, soon.

Nagisa knew he definitely shouldn’t, but picked up his phone with his free hand to google search if he had a type of rare illness or something. Given how long they’d tested him in the hospital just under a week ago, it was doubtful, but he didn’t know what else to do. His mother had gone out, and even if she were here, Nagisa had no desire to rely on her advice. 

Before he could search anything, he noticed a message notification from their class LINE group. It wasn’t anything that important, just a general inquiry to his wellbeing, but Nagisa felt himself snap. He hadn’t meant to rant, exactly, but he ended up sending a rushed paragraph about how exhausted he was, completed with a ‘I think I brought home the wrong child’. He practically collapsed down onto his desk chair, legs about to give out on him. Of course, Daichi kept up the crying.

When he stopped again, for a moment, Nagisa shouldn’t have gotten his hopes up. He did, though, so the stream of puke that came out of his son’s mouth, and directly onto him, still took him by surprise. Somehow, Nagisa still felt like he wasn’t actually ill. He was pretty sure this was just a reflex to all the crying.                       

“Oh no,” he said as gently as he could, lightly tapping Daichi’s back to make sure he got it all up. “That’s your own fault, you know.”

Daichi, who apparently hadn’t learned his lesson, continued to cry. He tried his best to soothe him, dreading the fact that he’d have to try and feed him again soon, since the contents of his stomach were now located on Nagisa’s hoodie. Not that he minded the fate of his clothes, which were more of an afterthought. He barely even heard the door buzz.

“Yo,” Karma leant against the frame, “what’s the matter with him?”

Nagisa blinked, like he was some kind of apparition. “K-karma? What are you-“

Apparently not about to answer his question, Karma reached over, taking Daichi into his own arms. Nagisa didn’t resist him, watching it happen. Daichi’s mouth went completely shut for a moment, before he blinked up and sighed, snuggling into Karma’s arms like nothing was wrong. Absolutely stunned, Nagisa watched Daichi closely, who was apparently choosing favourites. _Little traitor_.

“Miss me, huh?” He said gently, and then shrugged. “I figured it was my turn.” 

“ _Your_ turn?” Nagisa couldn’t even be jealous or anything. He was just _relieved_.

He looked Nagisa dead in the eye. “Well yeah,” he said, “you’ve had him alone for a few days now, so… Unless you don’t _want_ me to take him.”

Debating it with himself, Nagisa’s desire to finally have a nap won out. Karma was right, anyway. As much as leaving Daichi anywhere did pain him, it probably _was_ his turn. He was half Karma’s too, after all, so Nagisa wasn’t exactly worried about the idea. If anything, he was sure Karma would be less clueless than he was.

Still, he needed to be responsible. “Take him _where_?”

“I don’t know,” Karma said casually, looking far more interested in Daichi’s movements. “Out, somewhere.”

“Great!” Nagisa responded, and then thought about it. “Hang on.”

With good speed, he rushed around the small apartment, grabbing all the things he’d found necessary in the last few days. It was a really good thing they’d bought that large bag. Somewhat haphazardly, he threw in everything, though he did make sure to double check. He also pulled out a couple of blankets, because he was pretty sure it was cold outside.

“I changed him around half an hour ago, he hasn’t been fed in a while and he threw up whatever he did have in his stomach, so you’ll need to do that soon. Also, he’s been crying for ages, hopefully he’ll sleep or something,” Nagisa thrust the bag into Karma’s hands, hoping he’d taken in all that.

Karma nodded. “I’ve got it.”

* * *

Once he’d managed to get that pram down Nagisa’s horrifically inconvenient stairs, Karma didn’t know where to start. There wasn’t all that much you could do with a week old baby, he realised very quickly. It was cold outside, so he couldn’t take him anywhere. At least, he was pretty sure keeping babies warm was important.

Figuring it was better than sitting at the bottom of the apartment building all day, Karma decided to just go back to his house. A small walk wouldn’t be so bad. He got up, looking down at the pram. For all he’d been crying when Karma got there, Daichi seemed pretty chilled out, minutes away from falling asleep by the looks of it.

He’d felt bad, reading Nagisa’s message, like he was just leaving him high and dry with their kid. Logically, he knew that wasn’t really the case, and he didn’t want to just walk around following Nagisa like a lost puppy, either. This was the least he could do. Not like it was a chore, though. He smiled, despite the fact Daichi couldn’t smile back at him yet.

As soon as he started walking, pushing the pram gently in front of him, Daichi was out like a light. Pretty proud of himself, he sped up just a little, assuming the motion was helping. All he really needed was a little bit of fresh air, it turned out. It wasn’t that far from Nagisa’s house to the train station, at least. Not that he was trying to cheap out or anything, but he was pleased to find out it was free for kids under six. Wistfully, he wished Daichi would stay that small. At the same time, though, he looked forward to when his favourite activity wasn’t ‘sleep’.

It was odd to have the elderly smile warmly at him. That wasn’t something that happened a lot to him, and honestly he soaked it up just a little, rocking the pram back and forwards a little bit. This could useful, actually. If this was the kind of reaction Daichi’s presence got him… It could be really good cover. Nothing too dangerous, though, not yet.

Equally weird was pushing him from down his own street. Karma didn’t have much attachment to it, like some people would. His parents had moved around so much, they’d only lived in Kunugigaoka since he was eleven. It was surprisingly long, for them, but Karma was glad of it. There probably wasn’t any sentimental reason to it, more than they considered Karma old enough to be left at home whilst they did whatever.

He noticed, instantly, the house wasn’t as he’d left it. And unless some neighbour had approached (unlikely), it meant his parents were home. The knocker was perfectly straight, and Karma tended to be heavy handed enough with the door that it was usually at an angle. Well, this would be interesting. The last time he even saw them was a weekend towards the end of the summer.

“Ah, Karma, you’re home,” his mother called, when she heard him move the door.

Karma sighed, carefully taking Daichi out. Luckily, the slight movement didn’t disturb him. Better to just get this over with, he figured. He hadn’t mentioned the whole Daichi thing, the last time. It was back before Nagisa was all ballooned up, and admittedly, Karma hadn’t accepted it himself fully at that point, not enough that he’d bring it up to his parents.

He swallowed, and entered the living room. “What brings you to Kunugigaoka?”

“You used the card,” his father blinked. “Almost two hundred thousand. We thought you’d been arrested.”

Karma rolled his eyes. “That sounds lame. I’d like to think my bail would be more than that.”

His mother tutted. “You know that’s only for emergencies.”

“It _was_ an emergency,” he defended. “Say, call it your ‘new baby’ gift to me. His name is Daichi by the way, I’d get him to say ‘hi’ but he’s taking a nap.”

“You spent two hundred thousand yen on a… baby…” His father thought aloud, like he couldn’t wrap his small mind around it.

“Like you can’t afford it,” he scoffed. “Want to see him?”

Nodding curtly, his mother held out her arms. “He has an old soul,” she said, after a moment. “I can feel it, just looking at him.”

He’d disagree, really. “Nagisa thinks he looks more like me, but Daichan’s facial expressions are all him.”

“Nagisa…” she trailed off. “Was that… that boy you brought around a few times?”

“Yeah,” he admitted, “that’s the one.”

“Never mind… _that_ ,” his father said. “There’s another reason we’re back in Japan.”

 He took Daichi back, satisfied that she’d had more than enough time with him.  “What’s with the suspense?”

His mother cleared her throat. “We were actually thinking-“

“-We’re buying a house in India,” his father finished. “Just south of Mumbai.”

What did they want, congratulations? A house warming gift? Honestly, Karma didn’t pay much attention to his parents’ whims anymore. There was no point, once they were set on an idea, they’d likely stick it out all the way to the end.

“In fact,” his mother said, “we plan to mostly move there.”

Ah, there it was. “Nice,” he shrugged.

“You’ve finished your compulsory education,” his father addressed him. “Not that I agree with any of that system, of course. If you wanted, we could just get you a private tutor. It’ll be hard to find a suitable school, unless you’re willing to take it in either Marathi or English.”

Karma felt the muscles in his arms tense. Perhaps, under different circumstances, he would have been on board. But it was too late, for his parents to suddenly start caring for him. He couldn’t help but look down. Somehow, the idea of leaving Daichi made him feel sick to his stomach. He’d never let himself fall that deep down the rabbit hole before, but Karma couldn’t stop himself from wondering how his parents had done it so _freely_ , over and over. Leaving anywhere… It would tear his heart in two.  

“I’m not going.”

His mother stiffened. “I suppose we can’t force you, physically.”

“Well,” his father stood up. “We’ll be going, then.”

“That’s all?” Karma bit out.

“Hmm,” he replied. “We have a meeting to get to, with an estate agent. Naturally, we’re selling this place.”

He left straight away, naturally, but Karma’s mother hesitated for a second. When she came closer, outstretching a hand as if she meant to ruffle his hair or something, Karma naturally moved away. Parental affection was a foreign concept to him. It was like they simultaneously saw him as both five and twenty.

Sighing, she made her distance. “Be good, okay?”

Karma said nothing, and made no gesture to allude to the fact he’d understood her. It was what she usually said, before disappearing to wherever for months on end. Permanently, this time, by the sounds of it. He didn’t move again when she left the room, only once he’d heard the front door shut. Though he was angry, he’d resisted the urge to yell. It wouldn’t get him anywhere. There was no use in fighting a hopeless battle. Well, Karma would just have to move past it.

“Just ignore them, eh, Daichi?” Karma half whispered, though nobody else could hear him. “They just don’t get how awesome you are. But that’s okay, you don’t need them. I’m starting to think I don’t, either.”

Though Daichi had slept through the exchange, he did begin to stir, after that. He squirmed a little, clearly bothered as he began opening and closing his gummy mouth. Suddenly, Karma felt just a little bit out of his depth. Of course, Nagisa had managed it the last few days, so it couldn’t be _hard_. By all means, he should be perfectly capable. Thinking about it for a moment, he remembered something a nurse had said.

“Hungry, huh?” He said aloud, though he wasn’t sure Daichi could really understand him. Though, he didn’t start crying at the idea, so Karma took it as a sign. It was easier to make up a bottle, than to try and read his son’s needs expertly, anyway. Thankfully, Daichi immediately took it, appearing content when Karma sat them down on the couch. He took the whole lot, at least, so he must have been hungry.

Karma figured he probably shouldn’t give him anymore, if he’d thrown up earlier. Daichi just blinked up at him expectantly for a moment, as if Karma had forgotten something. Somehow, it did jog his memory. He moved Daichi up over his shoulder like he was supposed to, and began to pat his back for a while.

“You know,” he said, “I think you’re all I really have.” He held Daichi close to his chest, still feeling like the luckiest person alive. “Say, it’s kind of boring down here, isn’t it?”

He spent the most time in his bedroom, anyway. Deciding it would probably be best to carry him as he was, Karma stood up, somewhat cautiously taking the stairs. They made it in one piece, at least, though he could sense Daichi looking around over his shoulder. Navigating the maze that was the current state of his bedroom floor, he made it to the end of the bed, sitting down on it. Then, he considered ‘what next’. There wasn’t that much of interest.

“Wanna see this?” He tried, standing up again to bring them over to the spice shelf he kept. “I collect these, sometimes. Not that you can have any of them yet. My favourite is cayenne pepper, but there are rarer up there,” he pointed. “I’ll make sure you appreciate spices, one day. Hmmm, how about video games or something, those are cool.”

Sitting back down again, though he’d moved Daichi back to the cradle position, he pulled out his Nintendo DS. Making sure it was close enough to his face to see, Karma attempted to play a game. It was kind of hard, with one of his hands effectively in use, but Daichi seemed to like it a little more, paying attention. He liked the bright moving colours, Karma guessed.

He was at a tiny loss, after his battery wore down. What else did Karma do, when he was bored?

“Want to try some pushups?”

* * *

 

Nagisa blinked sleepily, before the pounding on his door brought him to his senses. He yawned, sitting up to adjust to his surroundings. It felt like he’d been asleep for _decades_. Still, he was a little groggy, and sore, as he pulled himself to his feet to slide his door open.

“Oh,” he said, “hi, mum.”

She scanned over him. “Have you been sleeping the whole time I was back?” She peered in. “Where’s Daichi?”

He thought about it for a moment. “Karma took him,” he remembered. And thank god for that.

“He _what_?” She sounded baffled, like he’d announced they won the lottery or something.

Nagisa shrugged. “He dropped by and offered to take him for a few hours, it wasn’t that long ag-“

And then he caught sight of the clock. Nagisa had only meant to take a brief _nap_ , but at least eight hours had gone by. If nothing else was going to snap him out of it, that certainly did it. He rushed over to his phone, only to find no messages from Karma. He checked all other group messages too, but they were only general chit chat.

He nearly shrieked, at the attached image. The first thing Nagisa noticed, immediately, was that Karma was shirtless. If not for the baby resting on his chest, it would have come off as extremely provocative. His trousers were unsettlingly low on his hips, and the lighting showed off every inch of his well-maintained abdominal muscles perfectly… Before he started drooling, Nagisa forced himself to focus on the baby. Daichi was lying on his stomach, looking as cute as ever.

With nothing better to do than twirl his thumbs, Nagisa waited anxiously. Admittedly, the rest had been nice, and made him feel, physically, so much better. Emotionally, however, Nagisa couldn’t help but feel guilty. It made him feel less, that he’d needed this time out. It was an option that so many people didn’t have.

When Karma did arrive, he didn’t look bothered at all, at having Daichi all to himself. “Hey,” he said, “you look better.”

Looking down at the pram, where Daichi blinked up at him, Nagisa felt a tug on his heartstrings. He really had missed Daichi, even without knowing it. He couldn’t help himself from reaching in, holding the comfortably familiar weight of his son in his arms again. Apparently, Daichi wasn’t done with his earlier torture, because he started crying again almost instantly.

Nagisa squinted. “Well, nice to see you again too.”  

Lightly, Karma laughed. “He hasn’t slept properly,” he admitted, “only really short naps here and there.”

“Right,” Nagisa said. That made sense. “I was thinking of giving him a bath today… U-uh, do you wanna maybe help?”

“Sure,” Karma replied.

It seemed better to do that, and then put him down to sleep properly. He figured a good place to start would be the bathtub. Once he began to run the water, Daichi stopped crying again, apparently more interested in that than anything else. Nagisa wasn’t completely sure the best way to go about it, though he thought it would work if one of them held him, whilst the other washed him. Their bathtub was pretty shallow, anyway.

Once they’d both checked that it wasn’t too warm for him, Nagisa carefully lowered him down. Automatically, Karma leaned over, gently cupping the back of Daichi’s head and shoulders so he wouldn’t go underneath the water. Following his lead, Nagisa took hold of a small cup, gathering up a small amount of water to pour over his stomach.

Karma half laughed. “He looks like he’s at a spa or something.”

He had a point. Nagisa had never seen Daichi look _that_ content. His eyes were closed, though Nagisa could tell he wasn’t sleeping. Like he wanted them to do it, his limbs were spread out and relaxed, seemingly enjoying the attention and the sensation of the water. Nagisa had no complaints about that, he’d have hated it if Daichi really fussed and struggled. He squirted some of the infant wash they’d bought onto his hands, and Daichi didn’t seem to mind that, either. As first baths went, he’d call it successful.

Daichi started kicking a little when they lifted him out of the water, though Karma managed to get the towel around him quick enough that he didn’t start back up with the tears. He watched them, taking in the new experience. The level of focus, on top of everything else, melted him.

“He looks like a tiny cloud,” Nagisa found himself saying, as they dried him.

It was standard after that, as they changed him and got him into a sleep suit. Daichi seemed grateful, finally, to be in his crib. That, or, he was just tired from the pretty long day. Either way, he was out almost instantly. With luck, they’d get a good three hours or so before he needed feeding again. Nagisa was glad for that, at least.

 “I think we did well,” Karma said, keeping his voice low.

Though Nagisa wasn’t sure his exact meaning, he found himself nodding. “Were you really okay today?”

Karma stuffed his hands in his pockets. “Yeah, we were just fine. He’s no trouble.”

On the contrary, Daichi felt like nothing _but_ trouble. “I still can’t believe this time just one week ago, I was in hospital.”

It was also insane how quickly that time had gone. He’d never considered one week such a high amount of time, but it felt like Daichi had been here his entire lifetime. Honestly, he couldn’t even clearly remember what it was like, before. Now, everything was hectic and stressful and tiring, but as a trade off, Nagisa’s heart had doubled in size.

“Are you ready?” Karma asked. “To go back to school.”

Nagisa thought about it. “I think so. My body isn’t… back to how is used to be yet. I’m worried about the assassination.”

He straightened. “We can practise, if you want.”                  

“Right _now_?” Nagisa eyed him suspiciously.                        

“Sure,” Karma pulled out his hand, making it a flat target. “You can still hit, right?”

Karasuma had taught them how to do it properly, how to centre your body, create the perfect fit, and work with your weight. Thankfully, that was one of the first PE lessons they had, rather than the more advanced ones Nagisa had been banned from. Still, it felt different, attacking their teacher. He didn’t want to hurt Karma, not that he thought he could.

Weakly, he threw a punch, which barely even shifted Karma’s arms.

Something in Karma’s mood warped, a new fire burning in his eyes. “Is that all you’ve got?” He taunted.

It stirred Nagisa up. The gears in his mind began to spin, as bloodlust coursed through him. There was no chance he could try his clap stunner. Karma would be ready for it, and it would probably startle Daichi. Once he’d made his mind up, Nagisa calmed himself, forcing his outward appearance into a neutral demeanour. He was sure, the longer he looked Karma in the eye like that, the more Karma would anticipate his movements. Focusing fully, he found the right moment to strike.

At just the right opening, he jabbed his index finger into the centre of Karma’s throat. It was enough to shock the air out of him, so he was distracted enough for Nagisa to sweep his leg, causing Karma to stumble backwards and fall to the bed. Nagisa followed his momentum, placing a knee over both of his legs. To finish his move, he positioned his elbow, the toughest body part he had access to, poised to jab down on Karma’s throat.

“You’ll be fine in class,” Karma looked up at him, a flush dancing on his cheeks, probably embarrassment at losing. “I give.”

Ignoring the pride that swelled through him, the action had caused some moderate pain. He’d have to start to learn to live with it, until it went away, if he wanted to be any use in class. He kind of owed it to them, after the inconvenience of pregnancy. With his position, standing on his knees either side of Karma’s hips, Nagisa was actually a little taller. In no hurry to move, he kind of liked it.

Karma swallowed. “Do you want to watch something? Before Daichi wakes up again.”

Steeling himself with a deep breath, Nagisa decided it was a good plan. He climbed off Karma, settling down at his side. His bed was a lot smaller than Karma’s, but there was just enough space for the two of them to lie next to each other, though their thighs were pressed tightly together. Despite his extended nap, Nagisa still found himself getting drowsy, unable to focus of the video on Karma's phone screen, eventually falling asleep on Karma’s shoulder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you all enjoyed that one! It's nearly 4am, dear god. 
> 
> As always, I appreciate all comments and feedback!


	34. Registration Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After their sleep over, Karma and Nagisa officially register Daichi's birth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *arises from the dead with a new chapter*

Somehow, Nagisa almost slept through the whole night. At least, it was the very early hours of the morning when he woke up again. Considering Daichi needed feeding every two hours or so, the fact that Nagisa had somehow slept for that long was more than just a little bit alarming. Heart rate immediately picking up, he suddenly felt wide awake. And then Nagisa noticed footsteps.

“K-karma?” Nagisa blinked through the darkness.

The figure froze, and then relaxed. “About time you woke up.”

Nagisa forced himself to sit up. “You… stayed here?”

“Well,” Karma said, leaning over the crib, “I fell asleep just after you did, and you didn’t wake up when he started fussing, so.”

Ignoring the fact they’d had an impromptu sleepover, Nagisa immediately felt bad. He’d slept _all day_ , and excluding a few hours in the evening, all night too. There was no way he should have been that tired, and even though he clearly was, it wasn’t right to act on it for so long. Though, he supposed he was awake _now_. He shuffled to his feet, determined to do at least something helpful.

Apparently fine with Nagisa’s absence, Daichi had his eyes closed in sleep. Nagisa only had to assume, given the returning footsteps, that Karma had fed him and stuff. He looked pretty relaxed, anyway. He still couldn’t help but feel the guilt creep in, though. As his eyes blinked to properly adjust to the darkness of the room, he noticed Karma moved again.

At the sound of springs moving, Nagisa side stepped back over to his bed, which Karma was now casually occupying. His bed was actually pretty small, so Nagisa wasn’t exactly sure how they’d both fit in it comfortably during the night. That is, he assumed they had, unless Karma had stayed up that entire time. Though he was still tired, Nagisa hesitated about knowingly just climbing into bed with him.

“Uhm, I-“

Karma peeled one eye open. “I’m having a nap.”

Nagisa decided not to argue with him. It wasn’t like he had much on his agenda that day, anyway. There was still the matter of his things, he’d have to go get those soon. Considering he’d have to go back to school tomorrow, there wasn’t that much time left. Somehow, it seemed daunting. Sure, he’d left Daichi a couple of times, but he’d either been asleep, or majorly distracted by exams. With nothing to take up his thoughts, he knew it would he hard. But he also knew it was for the best. 

Quietly, he sat and watched his digital clock tick on. Still coming out of his sleep, time seemed to warp a little. Every time he lazily blinked, the numbers shifted by a significant amount. He yawned slightly, as it ticked by to twenty to seven, which was close enough. Looking over at the crib again, it was really odd to think that Daichi was officially a week old now. It felt like he’d been with them for a lifetime. The moment was kind of peaceful, just before the break of day.

The idea of daytime, and activity filling the house, made Nagisa realise that his mother would be awake too soon. She rarely slept past the sunrise. Filled with dread, Nagisa didn’t think she’d take too kindly to Karma staying over without permission, especially since he was _in_ his bed. Things had been strangely alright this past week, and Nagisa didn’t want to send her back into her darker state. After not having such rules for so long, he’d have to adjust.

Tentatively, Nagisa approached Karma’s sleeping form, and nudged him awake. “Uh, Karma-“

Karma groaned, rolling away from him. “S’not school.”

Kind of feeling like he was poking a wasp’s nest, Nagisa shook him. “You need to get up,” he said, his tone disguising the urgency he was feeling.

“What?” Karma sat up groggily.

“It’s getting late,” Nagisa glanced the clock. “And my mum will be up soon.”   

For whatever reason, he decided not to argue with Nagisa about it, picking what little stuff he’d brought up. Nagisa carefully opened his door a little, poking his head around it to check the coast was clear. Just as he was about to announce that it was, Karma had already taken the opposite route, stretching out on the balcony. Given all their training, Nagisa wasn’t too concerned about Karma leaving that way.

Nagisa stilled, after he’d joined him. A massive part of him really didn’t want Karma to leave. But there was no real excuse to hide behind, without facing the potential wrath of his mother. He had no idea why he felt like this, it wasn’t like him to be so attached. It had to be down to hormones, or _something_.

“L-later,” he started, grasping around his head for any kind of reasoning. “We should go do the registration stuff.”

Karma yawned. “Why today?”

He decided he could go with that. “We only have another week to do it, so it makes sense since we don’t have school today.” More than aware it didn’t make that much sense, Nagisa changed tactic. “Do you have your ID? I think they’d need that kind of thing, right?”

“I could go home and look for it…” Karma eyed him suspiciously. “Nagisa, wh-“

“Uhm,” Nagisa said, trying to hold back whatever useless ramblings came to him. “Thank you for everything yesterday. I’ll see you later?”

Thankfully, Karma was happy to shrug it off. “Sure, see you.” Before Nagisa could move from where he was stood, Karma folded him into a kind of hug. Nagisa wasn’t sure if it was a hug at all, Karma barely wrapped his arms around half his form before stilling, instantly putting distance between them. “Later,” he said, and expertly leapt from Nagisa’s building.

He just put it down to the fact that Karma was clingy in the mornings. That revelation had been pretty clear over the winter break, when Nagisa found his purpose morphed into mostly Karma’s personal pillow. Shuddering in the cold air, Nagisa made his way back inside his bedroom. With Daichi still soundly asleep, he felt pretty alone.

Collapsing onto his bed, which retained small amounts of Karma’s scent, Nagisa closed his eyes for a moment. He didn’t really get why he was feeling this way. He just hoped it would be over soon, so his mind wasn’t so busy all the time. It was _embarrassing_ , the way his heart started to beat faster whenever Karma was around. Though nobody could see him, Nagisa clenched his fist and rolled over, curling into a ball.

Daichi started fussing after a time, which distracted him enough. _Yes_ , Nagisa thought as he stood up, _this is all your fault_. Making the judgement that there was no reason to continue to hide from morning, he tried to collect himself. At least Daichi only needed changing (far less fun than feeding, but also less time consuming). When he settled, but didn’t slip straight back asleep, Nagisa decided that he may as well just get him dressed. Now he’d committed himself to getting all of Daichi’s registration papers sorted, he figured he may as well go and his things back also.

One positive was that he could kind of fit into his old clothes again. They’d been too loose on him when he bought them, and the extreme weight had mostly gone, so they were only a little tight. By no means was _anything_ ‘back to normal’, but Nagisa was glad that he didn’t necessarily look all that pregnant anymore. Hopefully, even his school uniform would be okay to wear again.

The smell of breakfast eventually drew him out of his bedroom. It was something he hadn’t really experienced for a while. So far, since he’d been back, his mother mostly left him to his own devices. He elected to take it as a good thing, though. It was the best way to look at things. She was waiting at the table for him, places set up. Hoping Daichi wouldn’t be too jealous of his eating, Nagisa put him down.

“Thanks,” Nagisa said, taking a sip of the tea.

There was clearly something off with his mother. “Next time Akabane decides to sleep over, tell him to use the front door,” she said, tone level.

Nagisa coughed and choked on his breakfast. “H-“

“Nagisa,” she glared at him, “I’m not oblivious.”

“M-mum,” he said very quickly, fear spiking through him. “I can explain, we were just-“

She rolled her eyes. “I know you’re not _doing_ anything. You gave birth just a week ago, and I’d hope you learnt your lesson.”

This was not the kind of conversation he wanted to have with his mother. He knew that at a point in most people’s lives, this ‘chat’ with parents was supposed to happen. Luckily, or so he thought, they’d avoided that. It wasn’t like he didn’t learn it in school, or anything. At least, if she _was_ going to talk about this with him, Nagisa had hoped it would be under better circumstances. His eyes raked to the floor as his cheeks flushed. Nagisa was tempted to explain that he and Karma were never an item to begin with, but the actual story of how he got drunk at a party (which he wasn’t supposed to be at in the first place), hooked up with his friend and then didn’t remember a thing about it until there were living consequences of his actions probably made it sound a whole lot worse.

“It’s not like that,” he muttered instead.

The sound of her own mug coming down on table jolted him. “Speak properly.” She sighed. “You know, I _do_ understand. Babies are tough work, and I wasn’t even alone in doing it, though it felt that way sometimes. Honestly, I’m shocked that you haven’t been left with this yet.”

That stirred a certain kind of anger in him. “It’s not like that,” he repeated again, firmer. “If anything Karma’s the one who wanted to keep him so badly, and the bond thing was _his_ suggestion.”

“Yes,” she continued, “but I know the reality of how teenage boys are. One idea one day, the next something completely different. But,” she said, “I’m willing to give you the benefit of the doubt. Fine, if you’re desperate to share parental responsibilities, then I’ll allow it. You know where the spare futon is. It’s not like you can do any _more_ damage.”

“I-I thought you wanted-“

That had been the wrong thing to say. “You think I _wanted_ this kind of life for you? After everything I’ve done for you?” Her breathing picked up, and Nagisa flinched. “If you hadn’t been so determined about this, things would be so much easier. And don’t think because I allowed you back here that I’m _happy_ about it.” Rather than yelling like usual, she calmed somewhat. “The hospital called me, when you were rushed in for the blood loss, and my first thought was that you’d simply dug your own grave. Of course, I couldn’t escape the dread of never seeing you again, even after everything, so I begun to consider it. I’ve _accepted_ this reality, now. Don’t mistake that for enthusiasm.”

“You’re right,” Nagisa said, suddenly a little solemn. “This isn’t the easiest path I could’ve taken, but, I wouldn’t go back and change my mind for anything in the world. Karma and I, we’re going to try our best.”  For good measure, he bowed his head a little. “And I’m thankful for whatever support you’ll give me along the way.”

“Hmm,” she said, and sipped her tea like nothing had happened.

It felt like some kind of warfare, though she wasn’t being cruel to him. In fact, she was giving him her consent to far more than Nagisa would have expected. Something had changed there, and he didn’t think it was just because he’d been in hospital. He wished he could just ignore that, but his investigative senses weren’t going to let him. Right then wasn’t the right time, though.   

“Thanks for the food,” he said when he was done. “We’re going to drop all the registration papers at the municipal office later.”

Disinterest. She met his eyes and nodded, but she didn’t say anything. It was better than screaming or other hysteria, though. Feeling like he should, Nagisa cleaned up the dishes and everything. Once Daichi was fed, he decided he didn’t want to wait around. A break from the rising atmosphere would be welcome, anyway.

Walking to Asano’s house was an odd experience, to say the least. Now that he was pushing a pram in front of him, it felt like foreign territory. Like he had done for many months, Nagisa checked that there was no car immediately in the driveway. When the coast was clear, though, instead of sneaking in through the side entrance, Nagisa did something he never had before, and rung the doorbell.

Toboso, who was presumably just fulfilling is regular duties in answering the door, looked down at him, face immediately brightening. “Nagisa san! You had the baby!”

He couldn’t resist returning his smile. “Yeah,” he peeled back the blankets a little, so he could see. “He’s really tiny, huh?”

“Hello there,” he bent down a little. Daichi didn’t have much of a reaction, but seemed to be attempting to focus on the man now invading his space. Toboso continued to beam at him though, apparently unbothered.  

The sound of heavy footsteps filled the silence. “What’s-“ Asano stopped midsentence, having noticed Nagisa’s presence.

“Hi, Asano kun,” Nagisa tried, feeling kind of on edge.

Cautiously, he continued down the stairs. “So. You had the kid alright, then?” Toboso moved aside when Asano came to the doorway, allowing him a look. “Weird. Do you want to come in or something?”

“Only to get the things I left,” Nagisa said. Somehow, if Asano was insinuating they hang out or something, it felt almost too weird. Though, Nagisa had been the one who insisted that they were friends now. He knew he shouldn’t just stop that, now he’d had the baby. Out of the people he socialised with regularly, Asano was probably the one who needed a friend the most.

Daichi chose that moment the start kicking around. Not crying like he was hungry or anything, which was a relief. It was probably just some kind of curiosity, Nagisa thought. Figuring he’d probably want to have a less obstructed view too, he moved to pick Daichi up. For a moment, he wonder if he just recognised the place or something. Though his eyes couldn’t focus on anything too far away, Nagisa suspected he was _trying_ to.

“I can go get it,” Asano offered.

Was he being genuinely nice? Without opportunity for personal gain? Then again, Asano had sat with him and got him to the hospital, so Nagisa shouldn’t be so surprised. Really, he was actually a pretty decent person. Without the difference of their positions, he couldn’t help but wonder if they’d have made friends anyway. 

So, Nagisa waited just on the edge of the hallway. Toboso excused himself, so once again, it was just him and Daichi. He hadn’t lost interest in the surroundings quite yet, so Nagisa bounced him a little, making the most of his active state. It wasn’t long before Asano returned, hands full of his things. It both seemed like a lot, and yet such a small amount to live from for so long.

“Oh,” he said, “thanks!” Realising he couldn’t really take the bags with the way he was holding Daichi, he moved on auto, handing him over to swap loads. He’d never realised how convenient prams were for storage, but he was incredibly thankful for it. There wouldn’t have been much hope of him carrying all of those bags on his back all day.

Asano coughed. “One question, before you go.”

Meeting his eye, Nagisa realised that he’d quite literally forced him to hold his son whilst he did all that. Asano didn’t look mad or anything, and he wasn’t holding Daichi badly, but he did seem moderately uncomfortable. Immediately feeling bad, Nagisa motioned with his arms as if to ask for him back, but Asano didn’t take the chance. On some level, then, he was enjoying this. Nagisa smiled with warmth, and dropped his arms.

“What is it?” He asked.

The tense in his muscles told him that Asano was being careful not to accidentally drop Daichi or something when he reached behind to pull out the gun. At the sight of it, Nagisa’s heart jumped out of his body. And then he recognised that it wasn’t just any gun, it was _his_ gun.

“What’s this?”

Nagisa felt honestly speechless. He wasn’t the best at coming up with excuses on the fly, and everything moderately sensible kind of abandoned him. There was no way he could deny its existence, but he couldn’t tell the truth either. Before they’d even been introduced to Korosensei, right back at the start of the school year, he’d been forced to sign a confidentiality agreement. Asano was probably the _most_ dangerous person to risk breaking that contract with.

He gulped. “I-it’s for paintball.”

“Paintball.”

Now he’d said it, he had to go for it. “Uh, yeah! I’m on a competitive team, that’s why it has the logo and everything.”

Asano didn’t look like he bought it, at all. “You were playing competitive paintball whilst you were pregnant?”

“Obviously not,” Nagisa laughed awkwardly. “I, uh, right, yes. I took a break from the competitive paintball, but I missed the glory days so I kept the gun as a memento.”

He pursed his lips. “You know I could get you expelled for unauthorised club activities.”

Nagisa put on his best smile. “Anyway, I’ll take the gun now, _and_ the baby. I’ll see you in school, Asano kun!”

At the very least, Asano didn’t prevent him from leaving. He watched Nagisa like a hawk, though, as he tucked Daichi back into the crib and stashed the gun, before returning back inside. Nagisa wasn’t oblivious, he knew that if nothing else had caught him on to the unusual nature of the E Class, _that_ definitely had. But there wasn’t a lot he could do to fix it.

Turning around and pushing the pram away from the house felt like closing a massive chapter, but it also felt kind of good. There were many good things ahead. Daichi blinked up at him sweetly for a little while, but the motion of being rolled eventually ruled out and set him off to sleep again. It worked a little too well, actually. He’d have to start doing this, the next time Daichi felt like refusing to take a nap.

The offices weren’t exactly close, but the train skirted by them and the nearest station would be a further walk than he currently was facing. So, he just set off, enjoying the first fleeting moments of the ‘beginning of spring’ sunshine. Tomorrow, it would be March, and thus the month Korosensei’s death was due. The short time they had left was absolutely terrifying.

Unfortunately, during his extended walk, Nagisa didn’t manage to think of any amazing assassination plans. All he could think about was whether he had the correct paper work, and how exactly the conversation was going to go to get the forms in the first place. It all felt kind of mundane and boring, but also in a way that curiously thrilled him.

As it turned out, it wasn’t so hard. When he met Karma there, all they really had to do was stamp their names on the birth registration form. Of course, they read through it first, but it seemed pretty straight forward. There were a lot of things, important things, he hadn’t even thought about yet. He was really going to have to start, though, feeling overwhelmed by it all.

“Do you want the honours?” Karma said, hints of tease lacing his tone.

Nagisa looked down, at the space where he had to officially write out Daichi’s name. He hoped that when he was older, he wouldn’t dislike their choice, considering he’d have to live with it and everything. Using his best writing possible, he drew out the characters for ‘ _Akabane Daichi_ ’, and then put the pen down. Everything else seemed to be in order.

Noticing he was stirring again before Nagisa did, Karma picked Daichi up before he was able to feel ignored. “Guess what,” he said in a tone that was so unlike how he usually spoke, “you exist now legally. It might not seem like much of an achievement, but, we’re sure proud.”

Leaning on his arm a little, Nagisa slipped into his happy bubble.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so, I'm super sorry for not updating this past week. I got really sick, and either was alseep, too in pain, or didn't really have to motivation to write. But it's here now! This chapter is more to 'wrap things up', before we move into the... next... arc... Yay? 
> 
> As always, I love big responses. Maybe it'll even help my health, who knows. So please, leave all your comments and feedback! Till next time~


	35. Photo Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the school year begins to wind down, Korosensei has plans for the E Class year book

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for being lovely in my comments last chapter, I'm feeling a lot better now :D

“ _No~_ ,” Nagisa groaned at the sound of crying, trying to hide under the covers.

A warm finger prodded him. “Your turn.”

He groaned again, not like it would do much good. “But-“

Karma shoved him (out of his _own_ bed), before he could form a debate about it. He just couldn’t _wait_ until Daichi slept the whole way through the night. Honestly, the sleeping habits were the only thing in the world he’d dream of changing. Recovering from his shove, Nagisa stretched out before picking Daichi up, escorting him to the kitchen so he could heat up a bottle.

Though his mother had _kind of_ given her blessing for it, their new arrangement had developed pretty fluidly. They’d wound up not paying much attention to the ‘futon’ rule. Falling asleep in the same space just seemed natural, like the best way to go, even if Nagisa’s bed was exceptionally small for the both of them. Besides, with everything else going on in their lives, the ramifications of it were the least of his problems.

Despite his complaints, he’d found this second week of parenting easier than the first. With half of the night time responsibilities rather than all of them, he was certainly less tired.  He was less daunted, too, or at least he kind of knew what he was doing now when it came to Daichi’s care. Going back to school had been hard, but also made him feel less stir crazy. Physically, _things_ felt better too, at least he wasn’t cringing every time he had to sit. It was good, overall. A voice in the back of his head warned that it was perhaps a little _too_ good.

Testing that the temperature of the now prepared bottle was okay against his own skin, he shifted his focus to that. Daichi took it immediately, drinking the formula probably a little too fast. Nagisa couldn’t help but feel guilty for denying him, though realistically he did know he’d only delayed getting up for a few seconds. He thanked every god known to man when Daichi didn’t throw it all back up once he was done, just sighing sleepily after Nagisa had winded him. Honestly, all that child _did_ was sleep. Probably catching up on the nine months where he didn’t sleep at all and just kicked the hell out of Nagisa every few minutes, Nagisa thought.

Catching his tiredness once again, Nagisa padded back towards his bedroom. By the looks of it, when he slid his door back open, Karma had gone straight back to sleep after he left. Nagisa couldn’t blame him, honestly. Carefully, he tiptoed across the room, putting Daichi down with minimal noise. Pretty pleased with himself, Nagisa slid back into bed.

He lay on his side parallel to where Karma was. With his brain now pretty alert, Nagisa couldn’t help but watch him, just for a few moments. His sleep must have only been light, given his soft breathing. For reasons Nagisa wasn’t quite sure of, he reached, lightly playing with the strands of hair which covered Karma’s forehead. He pushed it back, exposing the pale skin that rarely saw light. Fleeting thoughts swirled around his mind, causing Nagisa’s heart to flutter.

“Go back to sleep, Nagisa,” Karma murmured.

It was all he could do not to _shriek._ Of course Karma hadn’t been asleep. _Of course_. He wanted to crawl under a rock and _die_. Instantly, Nagisa snatched his hand back and rolled over. Putting his back to Karma was dangerous, but it was better than potentially having to look him in the eye. Thankfully, he kept his distance, what little he could, until sleep won out.

 Karma woke him up again, though not for Daichi’s sake. In fact, when Nagisa’s eyes adjusted to the daylight streaming into his bedroom, Karma was already out of bed and dressed. He practically loomed over Nagisa, which made him hope Karma hadn’t been examining him like that for too long.

“ _Nagisa_ ~, wakey wakey.”

He couldn’t help but moan in protest. Nagisa didn’t exactly form any words, but he meant something akin to ‘five more minutes’. Just a bit of extra eye resting time, before he had to face the day. Honestly, Nagisa wasn’t exactly ‘not a morning person’, but he liked waking up naturally, when his body felt like it, rather than via ‘double pronged Akabane Alarm Attack’.

Karma straightened. “Guess I’ll just have to kiss you or something.”

That got his attention. He was still a bit too groggy to freak out over it, though he did pull the sheets tigther around his body. “ _What_?”

“Well,” Karma said matter of factly, “if you’re gonna go all sleeping beauty on me, I don’t have much of a _choice._ ”

He bolted upright, throwing the sheet over Karma’s head in panic. “Alright I’m up!”

Smirk revealed once he’d rid himself of the sheet, Karma pulled his phone out of his back pocket. “What do you think?”

“’Bring Daichi with you to class today’,” Nagisa read aloud. “From Korosensei. Why? What does he want?”

Karma shrugged. “Who knows. I don’t mind anyway, it’s down to you.”

He weighed it out. On the one hand, Korosensei wouldn’t request something like that for no reason. _Weird_ reasons, sure, but not just on a whim. It must be important, and Nagisa would feel bad ignoring that. However, taking Daichi with them to school, _all_ day... He wasn’t sure how Daichi would even react to that.

“I think it’s okay,” Nagisa said, eventually.

Which meant they had to dress him in proper, warm, outside clothes. As much as Daichi seemed to like bath time, heavy clothes, and actually getting him into them, was a completely different story. Nagisa didn’t blame him, though. He, too, probably wouldn’t like his limbs being manipulated and forced into confining clothing. If only Daichi didn’t act like they were _torturing_ him…

He’d calmed down by breakfast. By that, Karma distracted him with a bottle, whilst Nagisa cooked. It wasn’t anything complicated at all, his culinary skills were kind of limited, but it was a bigger amount than usual. They’d need their strength, for whatever Korosensei had in store for them. He made a serving for his mother too, though she wasn’t up yet.

They were mostly done eating, by the time she actually came in. Nagisa swallowed, taking in her appearance. Though it hadn’t been enough to alarm him about leaving Daichi with her during school hours, she’d been acting weirdly apathetic recently, since their conversation the week before.

“Thanks,” she said after sitting down, ignoring the food to take a sip of her tea.

Nagisa steeled himself. “We’re going to take Daichi with us today.”

She shrugged, turning her head to look out of the window.

At least Karma knew better than to say anything. When it came to Nagisa’s mother, at least this past week, he’d subdued himself a little. Of course, Karma was an expert when it came to battle tactics, and apparently reigning in his personality when he needed to. Nagisa was silently thankful for it, though he was worried. His mother was the type to never show him weakness or vulnerability. Logically, such a change didn’t happen without a reason.

“I’m heading out,” she said, not actually touching her food.

Before Nagisa could form the words to ask where she was going, or for how long, she was up and out of the door. He watched dumbfounded for a moment, half expecting it to have been a phantom, and for her real self to emerge.

“What’s her problem?” Karma said, after taking a gulp of his coffee down.

Nagisa chewed his lip. He wished he _knew_. His notebook wasn’t in reach, so he made a mental note. Skipping meals could mean a lot of things, though without many other symptoms she probably wasn’t _ill_. Anxious, maybe. She seemed pretty on edge about something, which strengthened that theory. And leaving, without explanation. She’d been fully dressed, though she’d never been the type to casually lounge around.

The sound of letters being pushed through the door distracted them, though. Almost like a giddy child, Karma stood straight up, though he handed Daichi over before bending down for anything. Nagisa supposed he didn’t get post that often. Sifting through a dozen letters, he came over to the table with two.

“Look who’s popular,” he waved the envelopes in front of Nagisa’s face. 

Unfortunately, whilst he was holding an infant, Nagisa didn’t have the mobility to grab them from him. In fact, when Daichi started fussing, they were almost forgotten on the table. After changing him, Nagisa elected to just get him settled in the pram until they had to leave. Everything else seemed in order. The pieces of paper did catch his eye, though, before he was out of the door.

Ripping open the first one, Nagisa’s eyes scanned the characters rapidly, and his heart almost stopped. Losing control of his hands, he dropped it to the floor, blinking to try and process what he’d just read. Karma looked over in question.

“I… This is an acceptance letter,” he said shakily. “I-I got in to Keisetsu. I did it!”

Not entirely sure what came over him, Nagisa practically flung himself into Karma’s arms, wrapping himself up in the moment. Somehow, he was happy he wasn’t just experiencing this alone. Karma did squeeze him back.

“Good job,” Karma said against his ear.

“And you got into Kunugigaoka, right?” Nagisa released him, taking a step back.

Karma shrugged. “Not like I had to _try_.”

He chose to just ignore him. Realistically, he knew Karma probably _had_ tried, a lot. The original entrance exams he had to take to even get into Junior High had been a nightmare in paper form, the very memory of which made Nagisa shudder. He could only imagine the horrors Karma had supposedly breezed through. He didn’t buy the ‘no effort’ act in the slightest.

Moving on to the next letter, Nagisa’s stomach fell out of his body. He was silent, reading it over and over to make sure what he was seeing was right. When there was no chance he was just reading the statement wrong, his legs actually gave out on him and he was all of a sudden half sprawled on the floor.

“Woah,” Karma said, “who died?”

There was just the slightest edge to his tone, though, as if it could be a genuine question. Nagisa heaved, speechless. He hoped it might be forged or something. But it seemed legitimate, the right hospital was listed, as well as the debt figure he now owed it.  

“Half a million yen,” he wheezed. “I. Owe. Halfamillionyen.”

Karma snatched the medical bill out of his hand. “Let me see that.” His eyes scanned the page. “Don’t they have insurance for that kind of thing?”

“I didn’t get it,” Nagisa admitted. There was money available that covered childbirth costs would have required him to physically go to the municipal office and declare his pregnancy. Despite the clear benefits, he’d been far too embarrassed to just show up like that.

“Well,” Karma said, handing it back to him. “We better kill Korosensei.”

Though their assassination was hardly about the bounty anymore, there was at least some hope. Nagisa stashed the letter. He was concerned for his mother’s well being as it was, she didn’t need an extra something to freak out about. At least it the money wasn’t due too soon. With that reminder, it was about time to leave.

Karma stopped them, before they were through the door. “Is the pram a good idea?”

He had a point. “Right…” There was no way they were realistically going to get that thing all the way up the mountain to the class building.

“We could just carry him,” Karma suggested.

“The whole way?”

Already having made up his mind, Karma picked Daichi up, who didn’t too bothered to have his position shifted. As far as Nagisa could tell, he liked being carried, though it had never been for such a long time before, or through such conditions. Karma was strong enough to manage it, though, and they made it without much issue.

Of course, it did slow the both of them down enough that they were the last ones to arrive. They should have just left earlier, honestly, because the second they walked into the classroom, they were surrounded. Somehow, Karma managed to pass Daichi over without Nagisa really noticing, leaving him to the fray of their cooing classmates.

“How come you bought Daichan?” Kurahashi asked.

Nagisa would have answered her, but he couldn’t get much of a word in. At two weeks old, Daichi was probably still too small to understand and enjoy such attention, though Nagisa could see him attempting to focus, especially on those who got in a little closer. It was far better than being bothered by it all, though. Eventually, enough space cleared so he could sit down at his desk, just like normal.

Leaning over his desk slightly, Sugino looked over at Nagisa. “Did you hear about the Tokyo Yogurt Swallows’ game last night?”

Even in the best of times, Sugino knew that Nagisa didn’t really follow baseball, but that didn’t mean he had to entirely brush him off. “I didn’t get a chance,” Nagisa admitted. “What happened?”

He listened as Sugino launched into a commentator style retelling of what an amazing game it had really been, and all the new things he was going to have to try. Honestly, Sugino was a very passionate person when it came to his interests, and nothing quite matched baseball. Nagisa hoped for his sake he wouldn’t have to give it up again. It was nice, though, making him feel a lot better. Just because he was holding a baby now didn’t mean everything between them had to change.

Holding far less interest in the game than Nagisa did, at his side Kayano just smiled and nodded politely, looking in a somewhat dreamlike state.

Sugino addressed her directly. “What are you planning to do Kayano chan? Are you going to return to acting?”

She looked down. “I don’t know. I haven’t decided yet. I do miss acting, but,” she smiled. “I like it here a lot more.”

“It’s the final counselling sessions today,” Nagisa pointed out. Disliking the pressure that came with that just as much as Nagisa did, Daichi started crying. It wasn’t particularly loud, but still enough to tie Nagisa’s heart into knots. Hopelessly, he looked towards Karma, who quickly (for him) got up from the desk 

Nagisa looked up at him. “Will you take him?”

Without a protest, Karma lifted him out of his arms, rocking him gently for a few moments until he quietened down. “Coming to hang out with me, huh?” He pressed a brief kiss to Daichi’s cheek, transporting him back to his own desk.

“Huh…” Sugino said out loud, as if he was confused by the display.

Nagisa sighed, wearing a neutral smile. “Karma’s better at the calming down kind of thing. At least, when nothing’s actually wrong with him. He doesn’t know how to communicate other than crying, so he just does it sometimes.”

“I figured he was the type who make babies cry more,” Nakamura chimed in.

Before they could get too deep into the theories of parenting, Korosensei finally arrived. They went through the register as usual, which confused Nagisa somewhat, before he closed his book and sped up to Mach 20, doodling messages of congratulations on the blackboard.  

“You all got into one of your top two schools!” He announced. “Congratulations! Splendid job wielding those second blades of yours! You’ll all move on to high school like the twinkling stars you are! It’s a weight off my shoulders, too! We were supposed to start our final career counselling… but first there’s something I’d really like to do. And what does one do, on such a joyous occasion?” He paused, and then darkened his voice. “Editing.”  

“What for?!” Everyone said in unison.

Korosensei cleared his throat. “I’m making a year book of course, just for the E Class!”

“Making a yearbook?” Nagisa questioned.

“Yes!”

“Oh, right,” Kurahashi remembered. “We did a whole school one. With Karasuma Sensei as our teacher.”

“And poor Korosensei isn’t in a single shot,” Yada pointed out.  

“Actually… “ Chiba started. “He popped into a few at Mach speed, just under the radar.”

Behind him, Nagisa could feel Sugino’s interest. “It’s like one of those ghost photos.”

“Exactly! That’s why I want to use _these_ photos instead!” Suddenly, a flurry of pictures flew through the air, landing in gigantic piles on his desk. “A year of unguarded moments! These treasured selfies with all of you- thirty thousand in all! Now to find the most memorable ones together!”

“I don’t really like looking at pictures of myself,” Nakamura complained.

“Why not?” Fuwa asked from behind.

She sighed. “My eyes as so tiny.”

Approaching her swiftly, Korosensei pulled out picture. “Don’t worry – I’ve made versions with the big eye filter too!”

“How terribly kind of you,” she said dryly.

“The official yearbook does have plenty of the usual shots…” Sugino pointed out.

“If we’re making another one,” Hara said,  “we can be more unconventional””

Korosensei only pulled out more photos. “Leave it to me! Cool beauty Hayami san at the pet shop… Oh! And here’s a night time campus shot of Mimura on air guitar! I’m just getting started! Princess Kataoka, trying on her royal vestments! Dainty Muramatsu, right when a cockroach scurried out! Tuckered out Karma and Nagisa, embracing their newborn! Naked Okajima, running around the grounds at night in the buff!”

“Woah, hang on a minute!” Okajima stood up from his desk. “So there could be some super sketchy pics of me in there?”

“Find your own photos, all of them! Then get rid of them!”

It was pandemonium. Everyone rushed forwards, in an attempt to get their hands on the photos. Nagisa didn’t even want to know how bad some of the ones in the pile might be. He did manage to get his hands on a couple, though. The one Korosensei brought up was in the hospital, when he’d rested with his head on Karma’s shoulder for a while, Daichi between them. That was before their class had come to visit them, so he must have zoomed up to check they were okay or something. It was embarrassing, but… He kind of liked the shot, quickly stashing it in his own bag.

“Oh, my!” Korosensei said, amid the chaos. “Who knew editing would get you so fired up?” He didn’t seem too bothered about them being ripped up, though. “Okay, next we’ll choose photos for our school events! How about these, huh? What do you think?”

It really was a one of a kind year, Nagisa thought, as Korosensei pulled up even more photos of their experiences together. It had also been the best year, though. For a fleeting moment, he pictured how dull it would have been without the E Class.  

“Oh, but I haven’t taken _nearly_ enough photos!” Korosensei announced. “I was aiming for a ten thousand page year book! Outside, class! We’ll dress up and get a wider variety of shots!

That began to explain some things, like why he’d asked them to bring Daichi with them. It seemed he truly was serious about the whole ‘honorary membership’ thing. At least, until they got outside and into his apparently endless stream of costumes. Clearly, Korosensei just needed a baby to fit into some of these cosplays. Poor Daichi was subjected to a variety of outfits, to fit whatever purpose. Nagisa didn’t exactly have an issue with it, perhaps he should have, but some of them made him look incredibly cute.

Sugino, who had been forced to dress in Pokemon trainer getup (Korosensei insisted he could pull off an Ash Ketchum resemblance), was finally allowed out of their teacher’s grasp. The actual poses of the photos weren’t exactly athletic, but Sugino was wiping the sweat from his forehead, tired of how fussy Korosensei was being. He handed Daichi (who was in a Pikachu themed outfit) back over to Nagisa, tuckered out.

Thankfully, Nagisa had been mostly spared from the ordeal, though Korosensei was currently chasing Karma around for something… cowboy related. Karma didn’t look particularly impressed about being forced into the photo shoot, but even he didn’t stand a chance against Mach 20 speed. Korosensei had a hat on him already. For reasons unbeknownst to Nagisa, his shirt was also half off him.

Aside from appreciating his highly annoyed expression, Nagisa couldn’t stop his eyes from raking down. In the few times now that he’d spent in Karma’s company for full days, he hadn’t seen him actually work out. Biologically speaking, he was aware that alphas just tended to develop muscles easier, but it almost wasn’t _fair_. Nagisa needed to snap out of it. Never in his life had he stared at another guy’s exposed chest for such a long period of time. But, he just couldn’t help himself, picturing _exactly_ how those muscles would feel pressed up against his body in bed later.

“Korosensei helped us a lot with our entrance exams this February,” Kayano commented, snapping Nagisa out of his daze. “But otherwise it’s been a free for all.”  

“Yeah,” Nagisa said, throat still dry, “with us totally at his mercy.”

Karasuma sighed. “He’s probably spoiling you. You’ve come plenty far, thanks to your classes through January – now he wants to spoil his full-fledged students a little. I bet that’s what he’s thinking.

“Oh, I get it,” Kayano said.

“Do _you_ think we turned out like that too, Karasuma Sensei?” Nagisa couldn’t help but ask.

He considered Nagisa, then, meeting his eyes directly. “Sure. If I ever have a hard time, I’d trust you without hesitation. I can count on you.”

Ending that conversation, Bitch Sensei difted aimlessly through the shoot, mumbling to herself about something. It wasn’t in a language Nagisa could even recognise, which meant she was clearly completely out of it. There was a certain aura about her, though, like she was far more content than usual. In fact, it was the happiest Nagisa had probably ever seen her.

“What’s with all the mumbling lately?” Okuda voiced.

“Maybe she found religion,” Itona responded dryly.

Catching Korosensei’s attention, apparently even their teachers wouldn’t be spared. Karasuma and Bitch Sensei were suddenly dressed up for a wedding, western style with a proper bridal gown and bouquet. Bitch Sensei looked absolutely over the moon with this, whilst Karasuma was on the edge of anger. It wasn’t at the top of Nagisa’s priorities, but he did think they were a good match.

 “What’s the meaning of this?” Karasuma growled.

Korosensei practically giggled. “We need to get you in on the cosplay action, Karasuma sensei. Or is this a fitting?”

Nagisa may or may have not have joined in with the cheers and whoops of his classmates.

“Phew!” Korosensei exclaimed, finally putting his camera down. “That ought to be enough on campus photos.” It wasn’t going to end just there apparently, because expertly, Korosensei had them all in what could only be described as a gigantic handbag.

“Hang on a sec!” Terasaka called out.  

“Then why are we all stuffed in this bag?!” Maehara question.

“On-campus photos are hardly sufficient. I’ll be taking photos with you all around the world.” Korosensei said it like it was casual, like a trip around the world happened every day.

Terasaka looked around the group in horror. “What, now?!”  

“Why go to such lengths?!” Maehara continued.

“Because it’s fun. And that’s also why I’ll take the time and effort to use my ingenuity and tackle the year book with all my might! Here we go! Slingshot!” 

After being flown to Hawaii way back towards the start of the start of the school year, Nagisa didn’t mind Mach 20 travel that much. In fact, the speed was kind of exhilarating, much akin to a theme park ride. Watching the world go buy so fast, it was hard to not feel powerful. Surprisingly, Daichi didn’t seem too fussed about it either, save for a moment of confused squirming.

“Nowhere too wild, Korosensei!” Nagisa remembered. “He hasn’t had any vaccinations yet.” He sounded so old, saying that. Not just like a grown up, but practically ancient.

With limited time, they only visited major tourist destinations, and nowhere for too long. The Great Wall of China was pretty cool, though they struggled to get a decent group photo with all the people. They zoomed west, stopping at the most famous places, Moscow’s Red Square, Athens’ Parthenon, the Leaning Tower of Pisa and Coliseum. They briefly stopped for pastries underneath the Eiffel Tower, before jetting off to New York.

Despite it being late at night, due to the time difference, looking out at the Statue of Liberty was still impressive. Like most of what they’d seen that day, it was something Nagisa had only ever witnessed in pictures and movies before. It was crazy, how all of this was happening due to some disastrously bad grades.   

“Hey, Nagisa, look what I bought,” Karma said, behind him.

Nagisa turned, and immediately his soul dropped. “Where did you even _get_ that?”

He just shrugged, but looked kind of pleased with himself as he displayed baby clothes similar to the monstrosity (which Nagisa hadn’t gotten around to burning yet) they dressed Daichi in to come home from hospital. It was just white, with the tacky ‘I heart NY’ phrase on the front. Nagisa hated that kind of tourist trap thing, it looked awful.

“And the best part,” Karma said, and tugged out two matching shirts from the carrier bag he was holding.

“No.” Nagisa said immediately.

Practically pouting, Karma didn’t put them down anyway. “Don’t be a spoilsport. Family photo time, c’mon. When else will we be here?”

Groaning, Nagisa took the shirt from him, pulling it over his head. “Only one photo.”

Pretty tired from all the travelling, Daichi protested a little at his new outfit, but he didn’t throw a complete fit. It was one of the few moments ever Nagisa actually wanted him to kick up a fuss, to get him out of this. Still, he indulged Karma, holding Daichi up and leaning in close so he could fit in Karma’s selfie, with the famous statue in the background.

He didn’t get the chance to take any more, though, because Daichi actually did start crying. Somehow, Nagisa recognised it as hunger cries. Annoyingly, something that would be quite the process, or at least he’d found whilst out. Before he could even really begin to collect his thoughts, though, a warm bottle was pressed into his hand.

“Oh,” Nagisa said, “thanks, Korosensei.”

Their teacher’s face was coloured a kind of blue or purple, which tended to show shock or panic. Nagisa wished he had his notebook of weaknesses on him, right then. He’d just have to write it in later; is made nervous by crying babies. He let out a kind of laugh, before suddenly shrieking.

“Is that the time?! We need to get back in time for career counselling!”

Nagisa had forgotten all about that. Getting back into the bag, the journey home didn’t feel too long. Internally, he tried to ignore the thoughts that stirred up and crept about. When they landed back next to their class building, and Korosensei called their names one by one, Nagisa tried his best not to get lost in it. He knew what he wanted, he thought, but saying it to Korosensei…

When his turn came around, most people had already gone home. He was last, after all. As expected, Karma hung around, not showing much care for his own meeting. Karma knew what he wanted, though. Nagisa couldn’t help but be envious of that, as he handed Daichi to him and stepped into the staff room.

“Now then…” Korosensei begun. “Have you found what you’d like to be, Nagisa kun?”

Last time, he’d asked Nagisa to think, to _really_ think about his options. Nagisa had been so lost back then, but now, finally, he was finding his own two feet. In that moment, assassination, his very best talent, had felt like the only option. Now looking at it, Nagisa couldn’t imagine something worse. Though it was true he had high potential for success, and he didn’t hate the actual career, it would just be so wrong. There was a lot of risk and sacrifice involved with that life, most suitable for an existence of loneliness. But Nagisa wasn't alone. Leaving Daichi for long periods of time, with the potential that anything could go wrong and permanently _happen to him_ … Nagisa just couldn’t justify putting him through that.

“Korosensei…” He gathered all his confidence. “I’m going to be a teacher. I’m not fast like you, or invincible like you, or smart like you… But I want to be a teacher like you.”

It sounded like a crazy, far off dream. There could never be a teacher quite as good as Korosensei, Nagisa knew, but he could at least _try_. After spending time tutoring Sakura, Nagisa had developed a fondness for explaining things. He lit up with happiness, at her successes. It just felt _right_ , and once he’d considered it, the idea of a normal job, becoming a teacher, wouldn’t escape him.

Korosensei’s face changed to his ‘correct answer’ mode. “That’s right. It suits you. You each have a talent bestowed on you all equally that you will also lose equally some day: youth. Keep swimming forward now, without stopping, before this talent, your youth, escapes you.”

“I will,” Nagisa promised. “See you tomorrow, Korosensei!”

“Yes, see you then.”

Feeling happy now it was over, Nagisa joined Karma, who was the only other person waiting around. Daichi was fast asleep in his arms, completely unbothered by their motions as they begun to walk home together. Then again, Nagisa could hardly blame him, it had been an _exceptionally_ long day. It was a shame he wouldn’t remember any of it when he grew up, but at least they could say they took him places.

“How did it go?” Karma asked eventually.

Nagisa hummed. “Good. I-I think it’s going to be tough, but this is the path I want to be on.”

It was already dark, by the time they made it back to Nagisa’s building. He was almost dead on his feet himself, just about ready to collapse into bed. At least Korosensei hadn’t given them any homework or anything. 

“We’re back,” Nagisa said, when they entered.

Apparently not in a better mood than she’d been in earlier, his mother acknowledged them with a slight movement of the hand, remaining silent. It was far better than yelling, though. Not wanting to dwell on it, Nagisa practically pulled Karma into his bedroom, sliding the door closed behind them. Somewhat miraculously, Daichi was still fast asleep, and therefore easy to put down properly.

The moment they did, though, the entire building shook.

 “Probably just a mini earthquake,” Karma shrugged it off.

Nagisa had a bad feeling. Call it some kind of intuition, but he knew it can’t have been that. A flash of orange light from out of the window caught his attention. There was no way _that_ was nothing. Like something possessed him, he stepped out onto the balcony. From there, he could hardly comprehend what he saw.

“No,” he said, “look.”

Their class building, and the entire mountain that housed it, was covered in some sort of force field.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really hope you enjoyed this one! And yes, I've risen from the dead now. 
> 
> You know EXACTLY what we're headed for, whoops. 
> 
> As always, I truly appreciate all comments and feedback


	36. Barrier Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Karma, Nagisa, and the rest of 3E go to investigate the mysterious barrier over their school.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I cried writing this. Not because of the content, but because I was forced to watch a certain few episodes. It's only going to get worse, too. Whoops.

There was no way it could be some kind of fluke thing. The dome like shield that was covering the mountain looked too flawlessly executed for it to be some freelance assassination attempt. Even from his own balcony, Nagisa could see the army tanks in the street, the people rushing out of their homes to see what was happening. It was all so bone chillingly real. Something inside of Nagisa right there and then just _knew_ it was the end. 

But even from his apartment, Nagisa couldn’t really tell what was happening. The air in the room told him Karma was feeling the same way. Or, at least, was thinking about something. Acting fully on impulse, Nagisa knew he couldn’t just stay here. His feet carried him of their own accord as he left his bedroom.

“-now with no place to run thanks to the Shield of Earth, is the culprit behind the moon’s-“ The TV played what looked like an emergency broadcast. His mother was sitting in front of it, very still.

“Mum,” Nagisa begun, without the time to think about phrasing it well. “Can you watch Daichi for a few minutes?”

Taking her attention away from the TV, she turned to look at him. “ _What_ is this?”

“ _Please._ ” There was no use in hiding the desperation in his voice. “I’ll tell you everything after, but.”

Whilst he attempted to come up with any kind of explanation, she stared at him, blinking almost robotically. Her lips pressed tightly together and she lowered her gaze. In that moment, Nagisa felt like he had no choice but to just take her silence as agreement. When all was said and done, he knew she wasn’t cruel without true cause.

So Nagisa just nodded, and re-entered his room. “Come on,” he said, “it’s okay to go.”    

To his surprise, Karma didn’t say anything. As Nagisa looked over at him, though, his eyes were like a storm, a whirlwind of ash and fire and electricity. It wasn’t the face he usually wore when he was concentrating. There was something far more abstract going on up there. Still, he followed Nagisa, all the way out of the building and out into the streets.

“This road is closed!” Some sort of official was shouting. “Please follow instructions!”

He had to keep going, using his smaller body to his advantage to duck between people as the crowds got thicker. Eventually, there wasn’t much further he could go due to the guards blocking the road, but he could see the bright dome of light clear enough. A tsunami of dread washed over him. How naïve had they been, to believe that all of this could end peacefully?

“-This monster is in a stand off against the entire planet, of all things, and has taken some of our nation’s junior high students hostage, having gone under cover as a teacher. He is an extremely-“

The speech continued to play, from loud speakers, and Nagisa clenched his fist. It was so completely twisted and wrong, nothing at all what Korosensei was like. He felt sick, at the way they were so remorselessly dragging him through the mud.

“It’s their job to say that kind of stuff,” Karma said beside him, noticing his agitation. “Whatever this plan was, they planned for the public’s reception. This is just damage control.”

Nagisa didn’t care. It was still _wrong_. But he was helpless where he stood. With the amount of military personnel around, he didn’t have a hope in hell of sneaking in. From right where he was, Nagisa was certain he’d only be caught and immediately arrested if he even tried it, and that wouldn’t help anyone. He continued to push forwards, though Karma hung back.

 “Nagisa!”

Nagisa turned to face the girl running toward him. “Kayano!”  

“What is all this?!” She said, coming to a stop beside him.

It seemed other members of their class had showed up, too. Terasaka had managed to break to the front of the crowd, and was threatening someone, though to no avail. It wasn’t as if  the officer knew who they were, he supposed.

“Nagisa! Kayano!” Isogai rushed up towards them. - “Did you see the news? This is awful!”

Before Nagisa could answer him, he was blinded by bright camera flash. All at once, there were countless cameras pointed at him. Not even a person _comfortable_ with attention should be okay with this. Nagisa couldn’t even see how many there were, but it felt like he was on display for the entire world.

“Look at this!”

“Could these be the students that had been threatened by that monstrous teacher?”

“-You’re those junior high hostages, right?!”

“-Excuse me, how do you feel right now?”

“-You must be relieved to hear he’s been captured!”

Nagisa blinked, unable to fully focus on all the voices surrounding him. With microphones practically shoved under his chin, he could hardly even breathe. Weakly, he registered one of their comments. Korosensei had been captured? Was that what the lights were all about? 

 “What’s this about him forcing you to perform sham assassinations?”

“What was it like spending a whole year ruled by a teacher who could explode at any second?”

At the sound of commotion, Nagisa turned his head. Muratamatsu was trying to break free of one of them. “Shut up! It’s none of your business!”

“He’s not the evil teacher they’re saying he is!” Kurahashi addressed the cameras.

Naturally, the reporters ate it up and spun it. “Did that monster tell you to say that? How awful it must have been. You can tell us the truth. These are the innocent children that monster used as hostages!”

Why were they pitying them? A sinking feeling rushed through Nagisa, as he realised that Karma must have been right. It suited their narrative, the story they wanted to report on. There was no need for the truth, in their eyes.  

“You have no permission to film here!” Karasuma’s familiar voice boomed over their interrogations.  “Leave at once!”

“B-but,” one of them started, “what about our duty to report the truth?”

Karasuma stood talk, considering them all. “And terrify junior high kids for sheer entertainment value? Some duty! By the authority of the Defence Agency, this area is off limits. In the interest of public safety, I’ll ask you to leave. I’ll take these students into protective custody.”

Relief washed over Nagisa at that. Not just because he was being removed from the limelight, but also because there was a certain stability that came with Karasuma. No more government lies, he was sure, as their teacher Karasuma was somebody they could depend on. Nobody protested, apart from the press, as he lead them into a tent the military had obviously set up on a provisional basis.  

“Karasuma Sensei…” Isogai begun, once everybody had gathered round. “What happened to Korosensei?”

But then Karasuma stood up straight, and Nagisa could tell he was building a wall in-between himself and them. “Time was up. The government implemented their last resort, the one they’d been preparing all this time.”

“Their last resort?” Isogai pressed.

Takebayashi pushed his glasses up his nose. “That barrier, you mean?”

“That’s the only cage to keep him trapped,” Karasuma explained. “In a week, they’ll use a high power laser to kill him.”

Nagisa caught on immediately. He could see it all, how the government must have been preparing all of this. Right then, he knew that really they were a decoy. Something to keep Korosensei distracted and in one location. For them, it must have been a win win situation. If the class managed to pull off an assassination, it would still be problem solved. Somehow, that made his blood boil.

“No! What about _our_ assassination?” Maehara questioned, though it was useless.

“You tried your best so far.” Karasuma said, no emotion showing in his voice. “Now leave the rest to us.”

Terasaka eyed him up. “Oh, now you’re the big man, all ‘leave it to us’?!”

“We’re completely in the dark!” Kurahashi complained.

“And that statement made it sound like it’s all Korosensei’s fault!” Kanzaki added.

“This is _not_ cool,” Kataoka said. They told us to kill him, and now they’re elbowing in on _our_ job?!”

Perhaps he’d just grown up a lot recently, but when Nagisa thought about it, that wasn’t his view. Being used didn’t sit well with him in the slightest, _of course it didn’t_ , but he mentally took a step back. If he were in a position of power, and there was a chance the entire world could be destroyed, he wouldn’t sit there and do nothing. Karasuma was right, they’d had their chance, and not completed the assassination in time. It was only natural that such drastic measures were to be taken. Nagisa couldn’t resent that.

“And it won’t sit well with Korosensei unless we do the deed!” Isogai pointed out.

That, then, flipped things around for him. Though he understood the other perspective, Isogai’s words struck him in the heart. After everything they’d been through, it would be the worst betrayal of all to step back and let the government over. This entire year, Korosensei had been the best teacher, had supported and built them up in preparation for the day they’d kill him. Letting all of it be for _nothing_ , disappointing Korosensei… It made Nagisa’s stomach turn.

“Karasuma Sensei, please, let us go!” Nagisa joined in on the begging.

“There are elite troops posted throughout town and on the mountain. No more openings for you to use to your advantage.” Karasuma’s stare met Nagisa’s dangerously, as if he was planning on trying something. “Give it up.”

Somehow, Nagisa found his voice. “No! There’s so much we haven’t talked about with Korosensei! So much we still want to do! So please, let us go-”

Before Nagisa could continue his protest, Karasuma yanked him by the shirt, slamming him back down onto the floor. It wasn’t hard enough that he’d be truly hurt, in fact Nagisa didn’t think he’d even bruise from it, but it still shocked him. He’d never laid a finger on them, outside of training. In a sense, it pleased Nagisa to know he was seen as enough of a threat, rather than something dainty.

“I _can’t_ let you go!” Karasuma’s voice had more urgency in it. “This is national policy! Now you listen closely, Nagisa kun…” He tugged him back up by the material of his clothes. “Don’t give me a hard time. Are we clear?”

There was something there, Nagisa could tell. This was no regular scolding. Locking eyes with Karasuma, he couldn’t hide the emotion that was dancing around in there. Nagisa just _knew_ , on some kind of instinctual level, that Karasuma didn’t truly believe in the government stand point. But that wasn’t all. Nagisa practically lit up, placing why the phrasing of his words had sounded familiar.

“It’s no use, Nagisa.” Karma, who had been hanging away from the rest of their class, stood and entered the fray. “In the end, he’s just another company man. When push comes to shove, he’ll just follow orders to save his own skin.”

“That’s exactly right,” Karasuma nodded. “My position lets me protect people when they need it most. Besides, even going by my own conviction, I’m thinking he should be killed after all.” Apparently done with them, he begun to walk through their gathering, stopping to talk to another soldier. “Arrange transportation and escorts for them at once.”

“Sir!” The guard responded and followed Karasuma out of the tent.

Not wasting any time, Terasaka vented his frustrations. “Dammit! Karasuma! That bastard!”

“Terasaka kun…” Nagisa begun. He just had to get this feeling out.

“Huh?”

“Karasuma Sensei just said ‘don’t give me a hard time’, very clearly.”

“Yeah?” Terasaka looked at him weirdly. “So what?”

“Remember what he said earlier? ‘If I ever have a hard time, I’d trust you without hesitation. I can count on you’.” Nagisa gulped. The rest of what he was about to say was just a theory, and he would be addressing it everyone… He just hoped he was right. “So I think ‘don’t give me a hard time’ means he trusts us and can count on us to handle things. We have Karasuma Sensei’s trust – he’s leaving this to us. So…” Nagisa wasn’t the best at making plans. “Let’s put our heads together and sort it all out: what we want to accomplish, what we’re capable of, what Korosensei would want us to do.”

Thankfully, he was let off the hook. “Nagisa kun’s right,” Isogai stepped up. “Nobody else here would be comfortable just leaving this. Korosensei wouldn’t be either.”

Of course, there wasn’t a lot they could discuss in that space, where anybody could potentially hear them. Together, they just agreed to discuss it all on their class group chat. They had Ritsu on their side, of course, who could make the chat secure against even the government. There was no solid plan, quite yet, but Nagisa knew it would involve infiltrating the mountain. Even if all it meant was seeing Korosensei one last time, it would be worth it.

When the escorts came for them, nobody resisted. With the disruption, the streets were absolutely rammed with cars, so it wasn’t a fast journey home. Nagisa sat there, in an admittedly nice car, watching the world go by through darkened windows. It wasn’t hopeless, though. He wouldn’t let this be the end, no matter what the government tried to do.

Nagisa was at least grateful that they didn’t insist on walking him to his front door. If anything, though, that just made it incredibly obvious they were being watched. He and Karma, who had managed to convince them to take him back to Nagisa’s too, would have to be very careful about that in the coming days. It was time to start watching the movements of security cameras, though he wouldn’t be surprised if there were ground agents too.

Ready to meet his fate, Nagisa pulled the door open. Inside his own apartment, the entire experience felt foreign. There were no windows with a sightline of the school from there, and the rest of it was all kind of neutral. Like a self contained bubble. The TV and radio were turned off, so there was no sound apart from the distant blaring of sirens.

“Both of your faces were all over the news,” Nagisa’s mother came back in. She was carrying Daichi, who looked comfortable enough at least. “What _is_ this?”

Nagisa swallowed. “Mum, I-“

She glared at him. “Think long and hard on this, Nagisa. I want to hear the full truth from your own lips.” 

“I-I-“

“I’ll take Daichan,” Karma cut him off. Something in his expression told Nagisa not to question it. Thankfully, his mother didn’t resist him, in fact she held Daichi out like an offering. “This isn’t a conversation for me,” Karma said as he passed Nagisa to get to the front door, leaning in close enough so that only he would hear properly.

Karma had left him to it, then. Really though, Nagisa knew that he wouldn’t go far. He was right, this did feel like a conversation Nagisa needed to have with his mother. All he needed was to find the inner courage to do so. Easier said than done. 

“So,” his mother begun shortly. “This is the reason behind everything. You were held hostage all year and you were acting out.”

“No!” Nagisa exclaimed quickly. “That’s not-“

Her face clenched up. “I don’t recognise you anymore.”

“You’re right,” Nagisa said, dragging the fire out of him. “But I’ve changed for the better, mum, not the worse. We were never held _hostage_.”

“Then _what_?” She snapped. “What explanation do you have?”

He cringed. “Just please don’t freak out.”

Of course, he hadn’t changed out of his school uniform, before rushing out. So he could easily reach into his trouser pocket, and bring out the government issued knife. Somehow, she didn’t start screaming, though the fear in her form was very obvious.

“Mum,” he said, “at school, they trained us in assassination.”

And Nagisa begun to talk. At this point, he assumed nothing bad would actually come from breaking his confidentiality. So he started at the beginning, the true story of the moon’s explosion, through their summer trip, the real reason he’d ended up in hospital that time, up until what was currently happening. Throughout his explanation, she remained silent, but not uninterested. He made sure to include all the good times too, rather than just the facts. They were just as important.

“I’m very sorry for not telling you the truth before,” Nagisa said. “But I hope you can understand. I know it might sound ridiculous to you but, this year has been one of a kind, and there’s nothing I would change about it.” 

“’One of a kind’,” she scoffed. “Every day, it’s something new with you.” She stood, turning away from him.

Nagisa’s head shot up. “W-where are you going?”

“To lie down,” she snapped.

Feeling like he could just burst into tears, Nagisa stood there and just watched until she disappeared into her own bedroom. With everything that had happened that day, all he wanted to do was to pound on her door, begging for forgiveness and to be held like a little kid. But he took a deep breath instead, letting neutrality wash over him. He’d been through enough that he couldn’t just collapse _now_ , he would just have to steel himself and cope.

He opened the front door, stepping outside without locking it. Karma had positioned himself slumped against the wall, Daichi in some kind of a light sleep still, cradled in his arms. Though he was alert enough to look at Nagisa when he came out, Karma looked as if he could benefit from a very long nap. Sighing, Nagisa slid down the wall too, sitting down right beside Karma. 

“That wasn’t the worst she could have taken it,” Nagisa said. When Karma didn’t respond, aside from tilting his head slightly, Nagisa felt like curling up into a ball. “I just don’t think-“

“She’ll get over it,” Karma said plainly, cutting him off.

Perhaps it was just because he was exhausted, both physically and emotionally, but he leant his head on Karma’s shoulder. It wasn’t really comfortable, Karma was muscular rather than soft, and the difference in their heights meant that Nagisa’s head didn’t really fit well there, but somehow he didn’t care. There was just this something about being in his space that kept Nagisa drifting closer.

Karma’s own head was tilted towards him, ever so slowly inching closer. It was as if a phantom had reached into his chest and gripped him by the heart. His body was clenched up, about to crumble and cave in on itself. It wasn’t as though he tried to resist the urge to pull his body closer, but there was something else, deep down inside him, that made him hesitate.

The sound of Daichi stirring snapped him out of it. Nagisa found himself slowly blinking, as if adjusting to light, as he pulled back. Within moments, it became full out cries. In a sense, Nagisa was actually thankful for it.  

“He’s hungry,” Nagisa got out. “We have to go back inside.”

Karma shot him a look. “You can just _tell_?”

Pulling himself to his feet, Nagisa bent down, taking Daichi into his own arms. “I _guess_ ,” he admitted, “I just have a feeling.”

“Well,” Karma used a swinging momentum to jump right back onto his feet, “we have an infiltration to plan.”

He didn’t speak much about the plan, as he watched Nagisa make up a bottle. Even when Daichi was soothed and ready to fall back asleep again, he kept whatever his thoughts were on lock. It wouldn’t be an effective plan if he didn’t let anybody else know about it, so Nagisa could only assume he was working out all the tiny details. At least he’d perked up.

Even when they lay down together, Nagisa could tell that Karma’s brain was still working on overdrive. Considering how long a day it had been, that probably wasn’t healthy at all. There was something erratic going on there, like some kind of mad scientist working out his next experiment. Perhaps it was wrong to disturb him, but Nagisa knew it could wait until morning. He waited, examining Karma’s consciousness, until the right moment to strike. Karma jolted, at Nagisa’s fingers suddenly pressing into his neck, but he did then calm.

They locked eyes, for a moment, before Karma wrapped his arms around Nagisa. This differed, _greatly differed_ , from the other positions they’d been sleeping in. It would definitely qualify as cuddling. Nagisa weighed out his options, thankful that the darkness of the room was covering the flush he wore, before he decided he was okay with it. Karma relaxed, yet clinging to him like a teddy bear, was better than him being frantic.

Of course, it didn’t last for more than a few hours before Daichi woke them up again, and they had to slip apart. Throughout the night, though, they were still mostly close. At least, up until the sun rose and Karma’s relaxation had worn off. Nagisa had honestly never seen him so eager to greet the morning, but he decided not to question it.

“Looks like we have our own personal guards,” Karma stretched out, looking through the window.

Nagisa joined him, and sure enough, Karasuma’s agents were keeping an eye on them. Or, at least, were stationed outside the apartment building. With so much surveillance, it would be hard to really plan anything, so having Ritsu for communications was a massive advantage. Together, their plans would have to begin.

Somehow, he knew Karma had an idea, before he said anything. “It’s a good thing we have a cover.”

“Huh?” Nagisa questioned. “Cover? What cover?”

Karma smirked. “Time for Daichi’s first cherry blossom viewing.”

Getting the feeling that Karma was set enough in his plan without much regard for Nagisa’s opinion on this, he mostly just decided to accept it. “It’s too early in the year for that.”

“Fine,” Karma shot him a pointed look. “Time for a _generic picnic_ that just so happens to be in a great position for surveillance.”

Though he probably should have been more concerned or bothered about using their son as a decoy, Nagisa couldn’t help but agree it was a good plan. Who in their _right mind_ would bring such a young child to an environment like that, even without the added threat of accidentally being mistaken for trespassers by the army? Assessing it, Nagisa decided there was no real danger, at least not when compared with what they were planning to do.

As it turned out, pushing a sleeping infant around was the perfect disguise. Nagisa snuck a glance, and the agents barely batted an eyelid, suggesting they weren’t finding their activity suspicious. Naturally, they couldn’t get too close to the boundary, but they knew the mountain like the back of their own hands, and thus ways to approach it without drawing too much attention to themselves.

“So,” Karma said, as town turned to foliage, “have any ideas?”

Nagisa stopped in his tracks. “I thought _you_ had the idea.”

Not stopping himself, despite his pace being slowed by trying to push a pram over uneven ground, Karma shrugged. “You’re better at observation than anyone else. We only have one shot at this, so, we need to find the perfect angle.”

He couldn’t help but flutter under the slight praise. But it was also a lot of pressure, and Nagisa barely knew where to start. This was an entire _mountain_ to deal with. But they were all familiar with it, given Karasuma’s intense drills. Unless any member of the military had trained on this specific mountain, there was a significant advantage. So the main thing was finding the best route to take full advantage of that. Instinctively, Nagisa begun to consider the areas that had a lot of low roots and shrubs. Their class could run it blindfolded, but any outsider would potentially miss the danger and trip.

But Nagisa kind of got the feeling Karma had already thought of all of that. Any person could come up with that plan. No, Karma needed something only Nagisa could dream up. Unfortunately, it didn’t always work like that. Nagisa had to be right in the moment, sometimes, to fully see the perfect route to success. But he could try.

To no avail, he just stared into the trees, brain going through all the possible choices. That, at least, until a twig snapped and heavy footsteps filled the atmosphere. Nagisa turned sharply, knowing it was too late to try and disguise themselves. They’d been spotted.

“Hey!” The soldier said, taking fast steps over to them. “This area’s restricted! I’m going to have to ask you to-“

Karma pulled a kind of meek expression. “Oh? This area too?” He laughed it off. “Apologies, we thought it was just right up to the barrier. You know how it is with kids,” he gestured, “this one doesn’t like to sleep unless we take him on a walk.”  

The soldier softened, a little. “It’s no problem, an honest mistake.” Then, his face broke out into a full smile, like this was the most interesting thing that had happened all day.

“Yes,” Karma nodded, “sorry to be trouble! Gee, it must be important work here, huh?”

The poor man sighed. “Patrolling an entire mountain for trespassers isn’t that exciting. You’re the only people I’ve come across.”

“Right,” Karma said. “Nobody in town even _wants_ to come close, but we like the peace and quiet.”

Sensing his cue to talk, Nagisa nodded. “Yeah.”

The man barely paid attention to him, which seemed like it could work out in their favour. “How old is he?”

“Just over two weeks,” Karma beamed. “If I’m honest, this is the most interesting conversation _we’ve_ had in a while, too. So,” he continued, “patrolling, huh? We come up to this spot a lot… When are your breaks? I could point out some great spots.”

Nagisa was nearly astounded, as Karma continued to talk, about how well he was extracting this information. Given that the soldier wasn’t paying all that much attention to Nagisa, he could pretty easily note down the important stuff, without raising alarm. Within minutes, Nagisa had the details of their break pattern, where the patrols changed over, their location... It would take a bit of work, but it was enough to make an accurate diagram of the soldier’s paths. With this, they could play dirty, attack from behind.

“Well,” the man said, “I’m now very behind schedule. I hate to do this, but you still aren’t allowed to be up here this week.”

Karma waved him off. “It’s not a problem. Have a great day!”

They turned, making their way ‘back down the mountain’ until the soldier was completely out of earshot and eye. The whole experience made Nagisa giddy inside. By what he’d observed, the man wasn’t feeding them false information. At least, unless he was a master at hiding his body language, though Nagisa was certain he’d read his intentions correctly.

“We should feed all of that back to Ritsu,” Nagisa realised. “She’ll be able to calculate the best route.”

Karma nodded. “I have a few plans.” When Nagisa looked over at him as if to question, he lowered his head a little. “You could tell, even though they’re elites, they have rules to follow, a chain of command. We know this place better than them, so the best way is to mess with them – split off in small squads, and zero in on the bigger targets.”

It made a lot of sense, actually. It wasn’t just wild speculation, Nagisa could tell he’d really thought this through. He did as he said he would, when they got back, and supplied Ritsu with the information. After that, it was a waiting game, for the rest of the week. Now that they’d both played their part, returning to the mountain would just raise the alarm. So, with the help of their classmates chipping in here and there, everything was put into motion.

At least Karma was confident in his plan. He’d announced it on their group chat, even, and nobody had protested. Even sitting in his bedroom with Karma, Nagisa noticed the gears ticking behind his eyes. Nobody protested his request to take the lead, when it came down to it, though. Karma was good at playing to their individual strengths, drawing it out for maximum damage.

When the actual date of the assassination came, however, there was a lull towards the end. Despite being mostly trapped indoors with no school or anything all week, it hadn’t dragged on that much. It was like one gigantic rush of adrenaline. Of course, Nagisa also had Daichi to take care of full time, which really should be considered an actual _job_.

Maybe they were just saving their energy, but it was actually kind of peaceful. Whilst they waited for the thick of night to come, they rested on Nagisa’s bed, fully dressed in their special gear. They’d ended up with Daichi between them, more a bridge than a barrier. It occurred to Nagisa, then, that what they were about to do was real danger. It was worth it, to go out and honour their goals, to save the world… But it was a moment he may not be able to recapture, in the same way.

“Come on,” Nagisa eventually found himself saying. “We only have a short window.”

Karma nodded, pulling himself to his feet as he took Daichi with him, holding him close to his chest before kissing him briefly on the forehead.

Nagisa took him, hugging him in a similar fashion, his throat welling up. “We love you,” he said, barely even a whisper. He just had to force himself to remember that this wasn’t a goodbye. They’d be back, before morning, hopefully.

Knowing what Nagisa had to do, Karma nodded. “I’ll wait for you on the balcony.”

Gathering all the courage he had, Nagisa carried Daichi, making his way through his apartment until he reached his mother’s bedroom door. All week, he’d barely even seen her. Only when their paths crossed, which was inevitable in such a small home. At least, she hadn’t said much to him, and Nagisa could only hope it wasn’t resentment.  

She opened the door, and took one look at him, dressed for a mission. “So you’re going out, then.”

Gulping, Nagisa tried to remain calm. “Mum,” he begun, “please… Allow me to go. I-I need to see my teacher.”

Hesitating for just a moment, she exhaled. “Alright, if you believe it’s the right decision.”

“W-what?”

She looked him right in the eye. “I need to start making my peace. You’re not the helpless child you once were. For any parent, that’s a harsh reality to face, but… You didn’t listen to me all those months ago. Admittedly, I was shocked, and angry, that you were so willing to throw your life away, make the wrong decision. I’m not saying I would take back my view point, but I see now. You defied me, yet, I know somehow that for _you_ , you chose right. So I’m going to start having more faith in your decisions. If this is what you think is right, then, I believe you. Just please,” she tilted her head, just a little. “Allow me to remain your mother on some things.”

Nagisa felt inexplicably weightless. He tripped up on his words, trying to find the right ones. “U-uhm, will you-“

“Just don’t make a habit of it,” she said, taking Daichi from him.

He nodded. “We’ll be back by morning.”

“Nagisa.” Her tone was sharp. “Nothing dangerous.”

“Of course,” he replied, and sprinted into his bedroom, straight onto the balcony, and into a jump, landing on the next roof top. He didn’t have to turn, to sense Karma was right behind him. Of course, his centre of gravity had shifted since the last time he did anything like this, but his feet still knew how to carry him. As the others began to join them, they sped towards the school.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked this one! The next chapter might take a little longer than usual just because of the sheer AMOUNT of canon material, so please be patient ^_^ 
> 
> As always, I adore all comments and feedback! 
> 
> On another note, I made an ass class side blog now. Not for any particular reason, other than I wanted the URL, but go check it out if you want :) https://nagisasthickthighs.tumblr.com/


	37. Time To Say Goodbye

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 3E race up the mountain, desperate to see their beloved teacher one last time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im so sorry

Feeling the burn of exertion in his chest, Nagisa kept up the pace across the rooftops. It was very hard, with months of not really exercising, which had caused his endurance to go down. Still, the urgency of the situation won out on any urge to stop to catch his breath. They only had one shot at this. As they raced towards the school, Nagisa remembered to keep his body low, veiled in the darkness of night. They didn’t want to attract any reinforcements.

When they reached the edge of the forest, Isogai came to a stop, turning to address them all. “Our last mission: get everyone to school safely!”

And thus came the handover of power. “Okay,” Karma said, taking Isogai’s place. “You all know the plan. Advance.”

Nodding amongst everyone else, Nagisa stuck with Karma, as their group split off. They’d discussed this on their group chat- they’d break into small teams to target each bunch of guards. Karma was good at recognising everyone’s individual strengths, and using them to his advantage. He’d split everyone into groups that _worked_ together. All they had to do was approach from behind, before they’d be seen coming.

Nagisa could hear the commotion through his ear piece, as he and Karma came across their first few guards. They gave each other a quick nod, before Nagisa leapt out from the bush, startling one of them even before he made use of his stun clap. Once he had, though, Karma administered a punch to the back of his head, knocking him fully to the floor.

Immediately, Nagisa dropped down, tying the man up in restraint. Meanwhile, Karma fought a second guard, overpowering him without exerting too much effort. The third guy, focusing only on Karma, begun to back away. Nagisa saw his shot, swinging out a leg so that he tripped, falling forwards flat on his face.

Karma grinned like wildfire, pulling what looked like a wasabi tube out of his pocket. “Part of the plan,” he explained.

Nagisa wasn’t about to question that kind of thing, when it came to Karma. As long as it worked, Nagisa couldn’t complain. Still, they didn’t have that much time. There was only about three hours left until Korosensei’s deadline, and the most important thing was seeing him. Karma acknowledged that, it seemed, straight up shoving the tube up the first guy’s nose.   

“This squad’s taken care of, Karma,” Chiba’s voice came through the ear piece, as the man began to scream.

“Okay,” Karma said.

There was a small amount of static, before Chiba’s voice returned. “How’s things by you?”

“Hmm? Right now…” Karma looked critically at his torture.

“Ow!” The man cried out. “It burns!”  

“Sorry ‘bout that!” Karma ‘apologised’.” But you’re all such _pros_. How else am I going to get you to scream?”

Nagisa was a bystander, at least for this part. They had different styles, he didn’t enjoy ‘playing with his food’ as much. Still, Karma had a point. Plainly, Nagisa could see what he was doing. Better to lure the rest of the guards to _them_ , rather than aimlessly chase them around the mountain.

“Your screams’ll be the bait to lure even more reinforcements,” Karma explained, and then turned to Nagisa. “I’d like to take care of two or three more while I’m here. That’s doable, right, Ritsu?”

Nagisa saw her appear on Karma’s phone screen. “Yes. About three more are approaching over the ridge. And there’s a fixed machine gun on the high ground, with all the fir trees.”

“Roger. So if we go from the crimson-glory-vine thicket through the stand of stone oaks?”

“Yep. That should get you there.”

Karma nodded, satisfied. “Okay, Terasaka, go that way, take down their guys, and advance to the lone pine.”

“Got it!” Terasaka’s voice came over, clearly already on the move.

Somehow, Karma didn’t even need to say anything. On some instinctual level, Nagisa knew what their next move was. They took off again together, speeding closer towards their class building. With just the glint of his eye, Nagisa understood his next command, dive rolling low into a bush, as Karma swiftly scaled the tree. With all the commotion, all the guards had come right into this area, right where they wanted them.

“Okajima, I’m there,” Karma said, having taken his vantage position. “Another fifty meters.”

From his position, Nagisa could see Terasaka, Muramatsu, and Yoshida all break out into a sprint together. His eyes followed them, seeing they were gunning towards a far taller than average man. Something about him screamed that he was some kind of leader. He knocked them all back, as if it was effortless.

“Still some of you jokers left, eh?” He stood next to a low hanging tree, his form ominous and looming. Though, he was looking out, not behind him. Nagisa realised he could keep low, sweep around the foliage, and if he was extra careful, climb it without being noticed. “It’s true: we did let our guard down,” he said. “Looks like you kids are far better at this place than we are.”

At that moment, from somewhere undetectable, both Chiba and Hayami fired their shots. Of course, they were a perfect hit, right in the centre of his chest. Nagisa couldn’t thank their timing enough, given him the distraction he needed to continue his movements towards the tree. The guy pulled the stun darts out, as if they’d done nothing but pinched.

“Stun darts, eh? But if you know what you’re up against… It’s no problem at all.”

Nagisa could sense the end of Karma’s patience. Like a good leader, when his troops fell, he jumped into the fray himself. By the looks of it, he did manage to take the guy by surprise, but the punch he threw did nothing. Even Karma couldn’t instantly overpower someone with such a physical advantage to him, and he was knocked back.

“You punks…” He growled, very annoyed by then. “If you’d only behave, this’d all be over. What in blazes are you objecting to this late in the game?!”

“This is something we have to resolve ourselves!” Kanzaki ran at him, though didn’t make much of an impact.

Karma, who was stood up properly again, caught Nagisa’s eye from the branch he’d managed to scale. Giving him all the permission he needed in one glance, Nagisa lay his body out, getting ready. When the moment was exactly right, he threw down his knife, the quick blur of motion distracting the solider enough. Not wasting a moment, he dangled down from the tree by his legs, clapping hard.

He flipped down, keeping a hold of his head. “Karma!”

Karma was already there, launching into an impressive axe kick. Immediately, the man’s form crumpled onto the ground, boneless. Nagisa landed, just about keeping up on his own feet. Together, they’d managed to do it.  

“Nagisa?” Karma said.

Nagisa panted, slowly adjusting to what had just happened. Unable to help himself, he rushed forward, meeting Karma in a high five. Instead of pulling away, though, Karma’s hand clasped around his own, tugging him in. His other arm came around Nagisa’s back, making it a real hug. Feeling a sense of elation, Nagisa followed suit, feeling overwhelmed yet happy in Karma’s arms.

 “Hey! He’s still moving!” Kayano yanked them out of the moment, pointing to the still squirming soldier.

Quickly, the others moved in with their tasers. “You damn brats!” 

“Finish him off first, you dumbasses!” Terasaka yelled. “You can keep your show off high fives!”

Nagisa dropped out of Karma’s hold immediately. God, that was embarrassing. Karma had just… distracted him. What if their classmates hadn’t been there? Barely able to handle the shame, Nagisa turned his back. They could have got themselves into real danger. Damn Karma, for making him that way.

Once he was out, though, there were more important matters. They were facing right up against the barrier. Isogai was the first to take a step forwards, extending his palm first as a safety measure. He got through, though, and the rest of them quickly followed. 

Korosensei was waiting for them. “I could tell by the sound.”

“Sensei…” Nagisa let out. It felt good, to see him again, after the fear that they maybe wouldn’t.

“You’ve come so far, class.”

“Korosensei!” A communal cheer broke out, and everyone rushed towards him.

For a moment, the seriousness of the situation evaporated. Seeing Korosensei welcome them all so easily, like they were just going to school like normal… It put Nagisa at ease. Everything had been worth it, just to feel this again. The others also engaged in light conversation, expressing their joy at seeing Korosensei. Though he too was happy, however, Nagisa saw just the slightest fragment of sadness, even without his face shifting.  

“I see,” Korosensei eventually turned towards the sky. “So they’ll be firing the killing laser just before midnight. That much power would even shut down my Absolute Defence Form.”

“No!” Kataoka exclaimed.

Kurahashi came forwards. “Korosensei, let’s find a way out of here! We’ll be your hostages, or whatever it takes!”

“There’s no stopping that laser now,” he said, peacefully, “not when people know I’m out there.”

“Did you know all along that it would come to this?” Hayami asked, her head down.”

“Even if I don’t explode,” Korosensei said, “you can’t expect all these nations to not be afraid of a creature like me. Sooner or later, they’ll want to snuff me out. It’s only reasonable.”

Fuwa exhaled sharply. “There might have been away if only we’d acted sooner… Like breaking the barrier projectors, or making the rounds online or on TV to plead our case!”

“That would have gotten you labelled even more dangerous, and you might have been placed under even stricter surveillance. Besides, the projectors have impregnable defences. There are anti-aircraft weapons in place if I so much as hunk a rock at them. With your current capabilities and equipment, you’d likely get caught along the way. _That_ is how perfect this plan was. They spared nothing, pouring in tech and time and people. This assassination, this crystallisation of the world’s wisdom and efforts, surpasses my own abilities, for which I offer my respect and am honoured to have been its target.”

As much as Nagisa absolutely hated that reality, he knew Korosensei was entirely right. Nothing they could have done would have stopped _this_ from happening. They were just small parts of a massive scheme, out of their depths. But they shouldn’t be bitter about it, Nagisa realised. Even getting here, though it hadn’t necessarily caused much, was enough to be proud of.

“But…” Yada trailed. “Then all our hard work getting here – that was all wasted?”  

“Is anything ever really wasted, Yada san?” Korosensei reached out, touching her forehead with a tentacle. “The process, your hearts, that’s what’s important. You used every last bit of what you learned to come see me. As a teacher, there can be no greater happiness.”

“So what if time’s up!” Terasaka protested. “Why won’t the government and the rest of them hear us out, when we’re the ones who’ve been closest to you? This octopus…” he thought for a moment. “Okay, he’s a perv, but he’s not _dangerous_!”

Hazama sighed. “’We won’t listen to what those kids have to say. We’ll just pity them instead.’ It’s insulting.”  

“Like we can just shut up and take this…” Muramatsu said.

“Next time I see those goons, I’m gonna-“ Yoshida begun.

Korosensei grabbed hold of them. “Terasaka kun, all of you… Let me give you some advice. As you go through life, the mighty current of society is bound to get in your way, and there will certainly be times things didn’t go as you’d hoped. When this happens, do not look to society for a cause. Do not renounce society. Frankly, you’d be wasting your time. Instead, just say, ‘that’s life!’ and muddle your way through with frustration. Once you’re past it, consider: If society’s swift current is tossing you around, how should you be swimming there in its midst? You should have learned how, here in the E Class, in this assassination classroom. You don’t always have to stand and face it head on. You can run, and you can hide. If it’s not against the rules, you can try a sneak attack. You can use unconventional weapons. Stay determined – not impatient nor discouraged – and with repeated trial and error, you’re bound to reach a wonderful outcome eventually. That’s because each and every one of you is a top tier assassin who can do just that.”

“Geez. A lesson, _really_? Now?” Terasaka scoffed. 

Korosensei let out his signature laugh. “Now’s the time for this lesson. An educator never misses an opportunity to teach. But you know, for you to try so whole heartedly to save me…” His tentacles came down on each of them. “I’m so happy, I’ve been holding back tears this whole time. I mean it.”

Once the tentacles were removed from his skin, Nagisa touched his forehead. How was Korosensei so calm? Of course, his philosophies were fair enough, good, even, and Nagisa had to accept that there was no way to _stop_ this assassination now it had begun… But what about before? If Korosensei hadn’t given up his one year to become their teacher, if he hadn’t been so dedicated and faithful, he might have lived. It was almost as if _they_ were his greatest weakness.

“By the way, Nakamura san,” Korosensei continued on, “your footsteps were awfully gentle, even during that pitched battle. And… Do I smell something sweet?” 

“Sharp ears _and_ a sharp nose… It’s been exactly one year since the day the moon exploded, right?” Nakamura grinned, pulling a cake box out of her bag. “As I recall, Yukimura Sensei made today your birthday. Feel free to praise my skill in getting it here in one p- Hey, I’m talking!”

Korosensei leant over the cake, bright pink in colour. “But… It’s just… It’s my first sweet _anything_ in a week!”

“Ew! You’re drooling!” Nakamura complained, before giving up. “Come on guys, let’s get singing!”

With the rest of the class, Nagisa gathered round as the candle was lit. An odd sense of serenity washed over him. Forget about the moon, the laser, or any of the looming threat. This was just what it was, plain and simple, just a birthday party. Nagisa joined in singing with the others, the English ‘ _Happy Birthday’_ song ringing somewhat tunefully from them all.

“C’mon, blow it out, Korosensei!” Maehara said, as the rest of them cheered.

Korosensei leant over the cake, puffing up his chest, he prepared to blow. Before he could, however, a dark mass came out of the shadows. Almost… _tentacle_ like in form, it was like a black whip, smashing into the cake at a speed Nagisa’s own eyes could barely even comprehend. He turned, instantly meeting the two figures.

“Happy birthday,” Shiro, the man who had caused them so many issues in the past, snarled.

“Shi-no, Yanagisawa…” Terasaka trailed off. He was right, Yanagisawa was unmasked, now. Somehow, he looked less intimidating, less _evil_ , with his face covered.

He stood there, facing them, still like a marble statue.“The time is ripe. Let me give you the gift of the world’s cruellest death.”

Ignoring him, the eye naturally fell to the demonic mass stood right beside him, looming over the conversation. Nagisa wasn’t exactly about to break out into a scream, the creature’s form wasn’t _that_ kind of scary. No, it was more the type that made Nagisa’s bones freeze, limbs turning into piles of lead to keep him in place.

“Sensei…” It groaned, voice just as unsettling. “You know who I am, don’t you?”

“Why don’t I introduce hi – to your students, too.” Yanagisawa announced. “He’s the man who stole the name ‘the Reaper’ from that octopus. And…” the white robes fell from his body“…as of today, he’s the _new_ Korosensei.”

It let out another moan, like it was seriously in pain, and launched up into the sky, landing on the roof of the class building.

“That’s… Is that thing…?” Yoshida begun.

“Reaper 2.0…” Nagisa’s brain caught up, throat dry. “The one who’d attacked us!”  

Muramatsu recoiled. “Before it was just his face! Now his whole body is a monster!”

“He’s just had the same modifications as that octopus. The only difference is that he begged for them. Completely unlike that botched Itona or my little sister over there. Can you even imagine? A man who overpowered you singlehandedly even as a human now has both incomparable tentacles and hatred. The destructive power!” Yanagisawa continued on, like a mad scientist proud of his creation.

“Die!” 2.0 launched clean into the air.

Nagisa didn’t have much time to think about what was going to happen next, before his body was launched upwards and back. Like a shockwave, he couldn’t hold back his natural reaction to scream as he was launched. Everyone else, it seemed, had also been caught up in it. Less than a second later, Nagisa was back on the grass, though he’d hit it _hard_.

“A sonic boom,” Yanagisawa explained. “His tentacles have an initial velocity of Mach 2. And they can reach a top speed… of Mach 40.”

In the distance, 2.0 and Korosensei began to fight each other. Or, at least, what looked like it. It was far to fast, for Nagisa to really comprehend.

“M-mach 40?!” Okajima exclaimed.

“In short, his basic performance is doubled,” Yanagisawa explained. “2.0’s superhuman kinetic vision and intuition are amplified via his tentacles making him readily adaptable to a supersonic world. Unlike some amateur children, he took to his tentacles readily- just like version 1.0 over there. But the greatest difference is that unlike you and that octopus, those tentacles were designed with continuous operation in mind. You see, he needs no upkeep. He’s disposable. In exchange for only three months to live, I’ve made it so that he can tap into this tremendous energy. And there’s not even any danger of him exploding at death.” He let out a manic laugh. “A safe and flawless weapon, is it not?”

Beside him, Kayano shivered. “You always do this… Always hurting others- from your safe spot away from it all!”

Nagisa took his eyes off the fight in the distance, examining Kayano. He hadn’t considered how muddled her feelings must be. According to Korosensei, this was the man who had abused and tormented her sister. He couldn’t pretend to understand the full story, but he could see it written all over Kayano’s face. If he assumed correctly, she probably felt like she owed it to her sister, to stand up against Yanagisawa.

“Is that what you think?” He sneered, and pulled something out of his pocket. Too late, Nagisa realised that it was some kind of syringe, which he didn’t hesitate in injecting into his own neck. “I’m not prepared to _die_? Is that what you think?”

“Hey, that’s-“ Sugaya begun.

“It can’t be…” Okuda gasped.

Yanagisawa ripped off the plain cloak he was wearing. “I don’t give a damn about my life anymore.” Now that his chest and back were exposed, Nagisa could see that he was transforming. The tentacles weren’t dramatic, but Nagisa got the sense that was the _point_. “Not if I can kill you, who stole everything from me... Joints, muscle fibres, spinal cord, nerves: it may not be my entire body, but if I can gradually implant tentacles in these key places, I can become superhuman while retaining my human faculties… Die a pathetic death, guinea pig…” a bright, violet light burst from his covered eye “…so your beloved students will be scarred for life!”

In the distance, Korosensei was thrown back, flat onto the ground.

“Class…” He still managed to address them. “There’s something I forgot to mention in my earlier lesson: Even an assassin who’s cleverly avoided all head to head battles is sure to have a number of times in life when he or she must fight with every last ounce of strength. In my case… That would be now!”

With a frightening roar sound from 2.0, they launched at each other once more. Nagisa couldn’t really get much of a sense of what he was seeing. The fight was all so fast, far above any kind of human level. With every attack coming from 2.0, there was a sonic boom. This was the kind of battle that was beyond them, not even the same dimension. By his wildest guess, Korosensei was losing ground. In fact, he was slammed down hard into it.

“Korosensei!” Nagisa called out, almost on instinct. Automatically, he reached for his gun, drawing and aiming it. But then, Nagisa realised with shaky hands, he wasn’t even aiming at _anything_. The battle was mismatched between Korosensei and 2.0, but also between them. All the Special Forces training in the _world_ couldn’t have put them on the same stage. Nagisa hopelessly dropped the gun, collapsing onto the grass. You would think all their hard work was completely meaningless, a hindrance, even. They couldn’t do anything to help, and they couldn’t run away.

“Is he… starting to dodge?” Takebayashi said, bewildered.

Nagisa’s phone vibrated with Ritsu’s excitement. “Evading attacks with the minimum amount of strength, using soil to block the light…  He’s closing in and  ‘killing’ their power. Seeing him improvise a way to close their battle power gap… That’s our Korosensei, through and through.”  

The two super beings exploded back from each other, and the battle came to a stall.

“Yanagisawa,” Korosensei panted, “leave us. This is a place for students to learn and grow. You are not entitled to be here!”

Unfortunately, Yanagisawa didn’t seem swayed by that in the slightest. “Still fancy yourself a teacher, eh, guinea pig? Then let’s put you to the test. Don’t you see why we chose this moment to make our move?” He clicked, which caused 2.0 to start groaning even louder, flashing in bright red colours. “You’ll protect them, right? Isn’t that what a teacher does?”

A white beam from 2.0’s tentacles shot out, seemingly right towards Nagisa’s face. He had to close his eyes under the intensity, hearing only an explosion. When he opened them again, Korosensei was stood right in their path. There was no explanation other than that he’d taken all of that power, square in his chest.

“Korosensei!” Nagisa cried out in alarm.

“You’re the very model of an educator, guinea pig!” Yanagisawa practically cheered, like this was all just a game. “You can escape these harsh blows on your own, yet you take them head on to protect your students! Alright, 2.0. Next!”

Red lightning danced around 2.0’s towering form, but once again, Korosensei jumped in front of them, blocking any impact. No matter how many attacks there came, Korosensei stopped them from every single angle. Even for him, this wasn’t good. Korosensei even paused for a moment, doubling over to vomit.

 “Put the target with his students and this was bound to happen,” Yanagisawa sneered. “Wrong answer, kids. Deciding to show up here tonight was a bad move.”

“Stop, Yanagisawa!” The all too familiar commanding voice of Karasuma rung out. Nagisa turned his head sharply, and sure enough, he along with Bitch Sensei had made their way up the mountain. He pointed the gun at his head. “Don’t drag those students in any deeper!”

It was too late to warn him of Yanagisawa’s transformation. Using his new found super speed, he sped up, plainly slapping Karasuma hard enough that he immediately crumpled, knocked hard onto his side.

“Karasuma!” Bitch Sensei called out, rushing to his side.  

“Shut up and watch, government lapdogs. You don’t stand a chance against me now.”

Nagisa shook, where he stood. This entire fight, what it came down to, it was _their_ fault. Deep down, he realised, he’d known all along. They all had. Every fight, every moment… It rushed before his eyes. They’d seen this moment, how it would all end, and they’d looked away.

“How does it feel?” Yanagisawa continued, as Korosensei stood back up, but was immediately captured in a hold by 2.0. “What’s it like, seeing your despairing students being a hindrance to their dear, dear teacher? Now do you see it? Your greatest weak point?”

It was so clear. _They_ were Korosensei’s greatest weakness.

“That’s preposterous!” Korosensei announced, though, before Nagisa could get too deep into it. “This isn’t a question of right answer or wrong! They risked life and limb to try and save me, and overcame obstacles to meet me here! That process, those hearts- they’re the greatest gift a teacher could receive! They’re not a weak point, and they’re not a hindrance! They’re my students! And I’m proud of each and every one of them! What’s more… protecting one’s students is a teacher’s natural duty!”

Yanagisawa didn’t look particularly impressed. “Yes, yes, very good. But we’ll deny you that duty of yours, too. Soon your strength will run out, and the students you’ve been protecting? I will slaughter them. This year you gained by destroying our lives…I’ll make it have been all for naught! Then our revenge will finally be complete! Now, let’s continue. Better protect those sweet students of yours.”

He couldn’t do anything else, however, because a gun shot was sounded, and Korosensei was dropped in the shock of it all.

“Idiot!” Karma called out, sharply.

Nagisa snapped his head, only to see that Kayano had jumped into the fray. “But- how?!”

Kayano calmly lowered her gun, and pulled her knife. “Run, Korosensei. I’ll buy you time- just hide somewhere and recover!”

“Kayano san?!” Korosensei cried out in panic.

Right there and then, Nagisa didn’t blame him. He wanted to rush in, to go pull her back, but it was far too late. He just had to trust that Kayano knew what she was doing, or at least what she was getting into. It still felt _painful_ to witness, though. Even as Kayano was shoved by a tentacle, and somehow managed a clean slice.

“Oh, that’s a former tentacle user, for you,” Yanagisawa commented, scientifically. “Retained that kinetic vision, I see.”

“Stop, Kayano san!” Korosensei begged.

She turned to him. “I’d regretted it all this time. That it was my fault the class learned the truth. That I snatched away the fun times we’d had together. So at least… let me protect you… as your student!” 

“You were right! Thanks to your actions, the class got to learn what was truly important!” He tried to get up, but was immediately smacked back down again.

“2.0?” Yanagisawa called out, and then gave him the thumbs down.

Somehow, moments before it happened, Nagisa knew what was about to happen. But, Kayano had already launched herself into the air, preparing her attack. It was the quickest hit, but it probably wasn’t the best path. She should have stayed low… This was the only way Nagisa could even begin to handle what he was witnessing, breaking it down, just a bystander. He could only stand still, and see the tentacle coming for her.

When it pierced her clean, straight through the chest, even despite his best attempts, Nagisa felt something within him snap. It was so quick, Kayano didn’t have a chance to scream, before her heart was torn from her body. His own body shook, eyes dry with how wide they were. They have all been trained in assassination, but Nagisa had never actually seen death before. Not really, not right in front of his eyes.

His throat couldn’t produce any sound, his breaths were coming up way too fast and short for that. Helplessly, all he could do was watch, as 2.0 removed his tentacles, displaying the gaping hole through her centre. Flimsily, her body collapsed onto the grass, giving off the slightest twitches, an after effect of death.

It was too far away to see up in detail, but Nagisa could tell her eyes were still open, open yet glassed over. Shuddering, he remembered clearly how often he’d found those eyes a comfort. It wasn’t something he’d _questioned_. It was just a guarantee, every day, he’d just come into class, and at his side, Kayano would greet him. Warm smile, warm eyes. Even though she’d lied about her identity for most of the year, her friendship was still genuine, and that’s what had really _mattered._ And now it was over.

Yanagisawa continued to laugh like a psychopath. “I get to have _both_ sisters die right in front of me?! What a couple of trouble makers! Maybe I should have kept her as her sister’s stand in! Too bad I’m not interested in some holey bitch.”

Korosensei crawled over to her body, and his entire form combusted into crimson flames. It was so much more than the previous rage he’d exerted over the year, where he would turn a deathly black. Nagisa could hardly blame him, he’d probably look the exact same, if he had that ability. He was moments way from reaching for his own gun, to fire a bullet into the back of Yanagisawa’s skull.

“There we go! When you’re beside yourself, your emotions twisted, your whole body goes pitch black!” Yanagisawa exclaimed. “You couldn’t be at full power otherwise. In other words, this is the destructive creature showing his true colours! You yourself have negated the whole year you spent wearing that ridiculous yellow hypocrite’s face! Most satisfactory! And as for this full bore fury of yours… In showing his full power, 2.0 will negate that, too. Now for his final attack.”

He injected something into 2.0’s body, then, causing the creature to expel purple flames of its own. There was no use thinking of it as ‘him’, anymore. There was no human left in there. He charged at Korosensei again, who was forced to abandon Kayano’s body. Just like that, the battle continued, though it seemed faster than before, if that was possible.

Nagisa forced himself to take a deep breath, and it was as if everything happened at once. No matter how much he wanted to, how much every muscle in his body screamed for him to move, Nagisa couldn’t. It had just been proved to him that real death could happen, at any moment. Even if they all stormed at Yanagisawa at once, 2.0 had paramount power, they’d just be taken out. And going alone, that would be plain _suicide_.

Maybe if things had been different, Nagisa wouldn’t have stopped himself from going despite the risks. But as he let out air he was holding, Nagisa knew he couldn’t. It was stupid, regardless of the situation, but Nagisa had a lot to live for. Nothing, not even vengeance, would be worth giving all of that up. Besides, he’d promised his mother he’d be back by morning. He had a _son_ to think about now.

So Nagisa removed himself from the situation. It was the only way he could force himself to get out of this. Constructing a wall between his emotions and his logic, Nagisa examined everything. Right then, he had a duty to fulfil. His comrade’s corpse (it was the only way he could bear to think about it) had been left on the ground, and his main mission was to get to safety. Any good soldier would stop to collect the dead, though. He could allow himself that.

Whilst the rest of the class stood around in awe, Nagisa rushed over to the body. Up close, it was far more horrifying. The eyes were indeed wide open, struck in mid-death horror. Bending down, Nagisa closed them out of respect, before picking her up. He couldn’t bear to look at the damage to her midsection, though there was no avoiding the glimpses of bone jutting out of her skin, ribs snapped clean off by the tentacle.

“Let’s get away from here!” Nagisa called out to the others, standing properly. He wasn’t sure if it was just the adrenaline coursing through him or not, but he managed to support her corpse without too much strain.

“Nagisa?” Hayami let out, tuning to him.

“Now,” Nagisa urged, “while his attention is elsewhere! If we stay, we’ll get tangled up in this for sure!”

Okuda looked around nervously. “B-but-“  

“Running away is a perfectly sound battle tactic!” Karma cut in, eyes setting upon Nagisa’s with understanding.

Perhaps it was the power Karma exuded, or just everyone’s brains catching up, but nobody stuck around to argue. The rest of his classmates ran off, travelling to the bank of earth closer to the class building, more of a vantage position. Nagisa couldn’t quite sprint, not with the body, but he moved as fast as he could, panting when he finally came to a stop, only when a massive bomb sounded out. And, then, white light.

“No… “ Nagisa said to himself, “it’s yellow.”

“Nuh- uh, red!” Terasaka disagreed.

“Green!” Nakamura called out.

“Blue!” Kataoka added.

Nagisa’s head perked up. “White!”

Somehow, that white was far more brilliant than the first, so bright he couldn’t see much of what was happening, even if he’d tried. Yet another sonic boom sounded out, and then, after all the pandemonium, it went eerily silent. He could have sworn he saw Yanagisawa’s body fly back, though, dissolving against the anti-sensei force field. 2.0 was nowhere to be seen, though sparkles of light flew throughout the sky. As Korosensei collapsed onto the grass, he could only assume the fight was over. Nobody shouted for joy.

Keeping his arms as level and steady as he could, Nagisa stepped forwards. “Korosensei? Kayano, she’s-”

Before he could get it out, some of his classmates began to sob. Though he realised the danger was over now, Nagisa couldn’t bring himself to break down the wall he’d created. It was easier, to hold his emotions back. So, somehow, he didn’t produce any tears himself. What good would it do, at that point, anyway?

“Let’s lay her down,” Chiba suggested.

“No,” Korosensei said, “don’t, Nagisa kun. I don’t want her to have too much contact with the germs in the soil.” Koro

Nagisa trembled a little. Clearly, their teacher was so beside himself he hadn’t accepted it. “Korosensei…”

“Class, the past you’ve lost will never come back. I myself have made so many mistakes… But we can learn from the past so we don’t repeat it.” Surrounding his main body, smaller, white coloured tentacles appeared. They were almost ethereal, like little strings of light. Looking closer, though, they were tinted with red.

“Huh? W-what’s this?” Nagisa stammered, blinking rapidly.  

Korosensei looked him in the eye calmly. “Kayano’s blood and somatic cells. I gathered them up before she fell to the ground and stored them in a sterile membrane I made with compressed air.”

“I-in the middle of battle?!” His heart rate began to pick up. Could that be… hope?

“I’d set aside the tentacles meant for protecting you.” Korosensei reached over, taking Kayano from his arms. “Those were the only ones I didn’t use for fighting. Now to string all these cells together, one by one. Faster, more accurately…” Her entire body began to glow. “I’ve been improving my skills all year long – so if the same thing happens again, it won’t have the same tragic ending. Some cells can’t be repaired, so instead I’ll leave gaps and fill them with my mucus. Within a few days, her own cells should regenerate and replace it. I’m a tad low on blood. Type AB donors, please!”

Like obedient soldiers called to duty, Itona and Karma offered their arms. Korosensei didn’t waste any time, of course, attaching tentacles to them. Clearly, Nagisa could see the blood slowly being pumped out of them, and in to Kayano’s body.

“Nakamura san!” Korosensei commanded. “Gather up that birthday cake and put it my mouth!”

“Huh?” Nakamura said, somewhat taken aback. “But it’s a smashed up pile of dirt covered garbage!”

“I need to replenish my energy! And I wanted to eat it that whole fight! I’m calling thirty minute rule!”

Her eye twitched. “Thirty second!”

Disregarding the hygiene aspects, Nakamura did as he said, and he rapidly ate the cake as he continued to work. Peering in closer, Nagisa could see the wound close before his eyes. The wall he’d built seemed to sway, the light that hope produced only growing brighter.

“Now, once her heart starts working, she’ll come back to life,” Korosensei explained. “It should go perfectly, according to my ‘what to do for a gunshot student’ manual! I can say this now, but if your bodies were ever torn to pieces, I was prepared to put them back together.” He laid her on the grass, and his tentacles sparked with electricity. “As long as I’m around, that is. As long as the teacher is properly seeing his student.”

Like a makeshift defibrillator, Korosensei sent the electricity right into her chest. Nagisa’s breath caught, as her back arched. It was the longest second of Nagisa’s entire life, before suddenly, Kayano let out a gasp. At that, everything in Nagisa crashed down at once.

“Did you save me… again?” She sat up, as if she hadn’t just been _dead_.  

“As many times as it takes,” Korosensei said, and fixed her hair. “Your sister would have done the same.”

Collectively, everybody let go. There were cheers, jumps of excitement, yet more tears… Finally, there was something worth celebrating. Nagisa couldn’t hold back his wave of _relief_. For more than a few minutes there, he’d accepted there would be no out, no way to bring Kayano back. It was enough to make him forget everything else, flinging his arms around her shoulders in pure joy.

“Kayano… thank goodness you’re alright!” He said, because what else _could_ he say?

“Nagis-“ She sneezed, and then looked down. “Hey! What’s with this getup?!”

It took Nagisa a moment, to realise what her problem was. Though her skin had been completely healed, with no evidence that a gaping hole had been ripped into her, her actual clothes were still damaged. As it was, her chest was almost entirely exposed. With her life in the balance, it hadn’t exactly been a _priority_ , but Nagisa turned away in respect, cheeks tinting.

Not everyone showed the same concern, though. Okajima had to be physically restrained, and Itona was crouched down in front of her, staring critically.

“W-what?” Kayano questioned.  

Itona held his gaze. “Pathetic.”

“What is?!”

“Aw, c’mon.” Maehara pulled his jacket off, and wrapped it over her arms so at least she wasn’t _as_ exposed. “Korosensei even fixed up your hair for you.”

Kayano accepted the jacket, but turned her head. “Thanks, but I wish he’d fixed up my clothes first.”

“Y’know, Korosensei’s so generous with his care and all,”Okajima drawled, “you might’ve come out of that a little bustier than before!”  

“Is that so, Korosensei?” Yada accused.

Their teacher didn’t answer her question, though, instead collapsing straight onto his back. “Phew… I’m beat.” Compared to his usual somewhat frantic nature, Korosensei seemed unusually satisfied. That, and kind of… _frail._   “Class? What kind of assassin would let a dying target escape? Don’t you see? It’s killing time. Fun times… are bound to end. That’s what a classroom’s all about.”

A pit opened up in Nagisa’s stomach. Looking up above their heads, the original threat hadn’t _disappeared_. All of that had been a distraction. The light of the laser, shinning right down on them from above, told them it was right on schedule. There was no time to waste, or hesitate.

“Guys…” Isogai begun, facing them all. “We have to decide this ourselves. We could choose to stay out of this and leave it up to fate… Show of hands. Who doesn’t want to kill Korosensei?” Everyone, including Nagisa, stuck their hands up without hesitation. “Okay, hands down. Who wants to kill him?”

Muscles trembling, Nagisa raised his hand once again, knowing there was no going back. He couldn’t stand it, but it wouldn’t be right, to leave Korosensei to the laser. This is what the entire year had been building up to, right from the moment Karasuma first appeared in their classroom, announcing their mission. So much had changed since then, and Nagisa had been through things he hadn’t dreamed of, but something _had_ remained constant. They were killers. Their target was their teacher. And, now, as painful as it was, they had to graduate with their bond still intact.

Though he’d been the first of their class to admit his desire to kill Korosensei, Nagisa was frozen in place, as everyone else gathered around Korosensei’s body. It was one of the weaknesses he’d written down, not too long ago. Korosensei wouldn’t be able to escape, if all his tentacles were pinned at once. The others got into position, holding a tentacle down each. Nagisa stilled, though, his fingers clasping around his knife.

“You can’t move like this, right, Korosensei?” Nakamura asked.  

Korosensei nodded. “Exactly so, Nakamura san. I am worried about your weak grip, though.”

“Your heart is right under your tie. Who’s going to-“ Kataoka begun.

“You guys, please…” Nagisa stepped towards the others, his knife fully drawn. “Please, let me.”

It was an urge he couldn’t really explain. All the endless hours he’d spent looking up to Korosensei, studying his every move, taking in his lessons. Perhaps it was selfish, but, somehow, Nagisa would never be able to move on, if it wasn’t his blade. He looked down at his knife, then. How many times had that exact blade missed the mark? Being the one to strike, it was a massive ask.

“We got no complaints.” Terasaka almost grinned.

Karma looked him dead in the eye, his own pupils ablaze. “You’re the head of this class, Nagisa.”

Despite everything, the praise still _got_ him. For just a second, Nagisa allowed himself to beam, before continuing his approach. Steeling himself, he lowered his body so that he was sitting on Korosensei’s chest, poised for the kill. It felt wrong, though, to stroke so suddenly. At least, Nagisa felt like he should say _something_.

“Sensei…"

“Nagisa kun,” Korosensei looked him in the eye, “you can stab down through my tie. The very day I received this tie, I managed to put a hole in it. I left it like that. This, too, is an important connection. Ah, but first, I have to say my goodbyes to these teachers. Irina Sensei,” he turned his head, “are you sure you don’t want to join in? This is your chance at that bounty.”

Bitch Sensei shot him a kind of sad smile. “I’ve gotten enough already. So many ties, so much experience- from you and the children both. This assassination… Is the bond between you and those kids.”

“And, Karasuma Sensei- You, too, have made these students what they are today. Please continue to offer your guidance.“

“You may have caused me no end of trouble,” Karasuma said, “but this one year I’ll never forget. Farewell, Korosensei.”

“Yes.” Korosensei seemed to glow. “Now then, class, it’s about that time. Twenty four hours wouldn’t be enough time for me to say my goodbyes to each of you in turn. We can’t talk long… So instead, I’ll take attendance, one last time. Please look me in the eye and answer in a loud voice. Once you’ve all responded, you can kill me. N-nobody left early, did they?! If someone didn’t respond now, of all times, I’d kill myself!”

He was stalling, because of course he was. “Just do it already!” Some of the others shouted.

“Alright: Akabane Karma kun.”

Nagisa’s eyes darted over to Karma, who looked incredibly solemn. “Here.”

It was maddening, waiting for his turn. They did attendance every day, they’d been through this routine _countless_ times, but… Those times, they’d been the start, not the ending. There’d never been a ‘last time’, before. Nagisa didn’t look, but he could hear sniffles, even full out crying from behind him. It made his own throat well up.

“Shiota Nagisa kun.”

He forced the lump in his throat back down. “Here.”

Somehow, it was worse, once his turn was over. Realisation dawned on him that it would be the last words he exchanged with Korosensei. There was so much he still wanted to say, wanted to ask, and the moment was already gone. With every passing name, Korosensei got closer to the end of the class, and the dread built. Finally, he got to Ritsu, who was in tears herself.

“It was a really… really fun year,” Korosensei said, afterwards. “I’m so happy… to be killed by you all. From one traveller to another, a yell- for all of life!”

At the silence, Nagisa knew it had to be time. He gripped his knife, positioning it right above his target. At least, he attempted to. Through all his efforts, Nagisa couldn’t hold the blade still. All their lessons on accuracy, and the most basic thing… The harder he tried, the more impossible it seemed to be. No clean hits, then. Nagisa would just have to come down hard, and hope for the best. This was it, the moment everything had been building up to, and it was like a crushing weight. There was so much Nagisa was feeling, right then, that he unleashed it all in a guttural scream, bringing the blade down.

Before it could hit, though, one spare tentacle pressed against his neck. “Don’t kill me feeling like that. Calm yourself. Smile.”

Nagisa swallowed painfully. But if he was going to end Korosensei’s life, the least he could do was honour this final request. His eyes began to feel heavy and wet, though he didn’t quite register tears. He took a very deep breath, taking in the air as if it was his entire life. Everything, even the most insignificant of memories, flashed before him. There would never be another person in his life quite like Korosensei, but he was right. If not for this moment, the finish line, none of that would have even happened. So, Nagisa exhaled, and brought a smile onto his face.

“Goodbye, Korosensei.”

“Yes,” Korosensei said, “goodbye.”

That blade- the one he’d carried around, relied on all year- became a vessel for his emotions. _Everything_ went into that blade. All his thoughts, his feelings, his soul itself… It flowed through him, and Nagisa gave everything, in that one motion. This was his final thank you to Korosensei, the one he deserved, for all he’d done for Nagisa. His arm came down, and he felt the pressure of the knife digging into Korosensei’s chest.

From the wound, golden flecks of light began to spill out. It almost felt like a congratulations, for graduating. His hand still gripping the knife, Nagisa’s eyes drew up, watching the lights swirl around the sky, like a million fireflies. Looking back down again, Korosensei’s body was completely gone, deflated. All that was left was his tie, and the knife Nagisa held.

The sky was completely ablaze with the lights, but some of them were already floating away, out into the night sky. There would be nothing left of Korosensei. It was that moment, that realisation of what Nagisa had really just done, that everything broke away. Korosensei was gone, dead. Nagisa would never see him again.

Every inch of pain came tumbling out of him. Nagisa doubled over, clutching his chest, as if that would help at all to heal the hole he’d just stabbed through it. Nothing could have stopped his sobs, which sounded more like screams, filling the silence up. He didn’t even care that he wasn’t alone, that the others were all crying too. Nagisa just screamed and screamed, because there was nothing else _left_. It was the only thing his body could produce, in its desperation.

It was, without a doubt and despite everything else he’d been through, the worst pain he’d ever felt. This was a permanent pain, one without any kind of end in sight, and Nagisa was hopeless. He couldn’t fix it, couldn’t take it back, so he remained there, hunched over where Korosensei’s body had been, and cried until he physically couldn’t anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I literally cried writing this (three times) okay I can't 
> 
> Sorry that this is just kind of exactly what happened in the anime, but I didn't want to skip over it, and honestly Daichi isn't going to be in the forefront of Nagisa's mind, in a situation such as that. Next chapter, though, we'll see him again. 
> 
> Well then, I'm sorry for any emotional trauma caused.


	38. Aftermath Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The class graduates

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologise for last chapter's depression, here's fluff :')

Nagisa lost all sense of time. All he knew was that eventually, it hard turned midnight, which meant it was graduation day. Without really thinking about it, they’d drifted back inside, with not a lot left for them out there. Once all the specks of light had flown way, at least, there was no other trace of Korosensei. He’d meant to search their old class building for some memory of Korosensei, but he’d been distracted by the two large books on his desks. In fact, they, along with a diploma, were placed in front of _everyone_.

He sat down at his own desk, trying to find a way to process everything. Unable to resist his curiosity, Nagisa opened the one entitled ‘year book’, and fresh tears began to form, not that they’d really stopped, though. The book was about as thick as five dictionaries, at his best guess. At one look at the first photograph, a group shot, Nagisa slammed it closed again. It was too much, right then. He turned his attention to the other book, ‘Korosensei’s Rules To Live By’. Nagisa almost laughed, when the first page was just a manga.

If the laser hit them, Nagisa didn’t notice it. With how long (and _incredibly_ detailed) the book turned out to be, and the emotional exhaustion of it all, he fell asleep, right at his desk. The next thing he knew, he was blinking his eyes open to sunlight. Still in a kind of trance, he stood up, walking over to the window.

Having Daichi had turned him into a light sleeper, with the constant waking up to feed him, so he was noticeably the first to wake. Nagisa’s stomach flipped over itself. He’d promise his mother he’d be back by morning. There was no way this wasn’t all over the news, though. He just prayed she wouldn’t worry. Outside, Nagisa caught sight of Karasuma, talking to some of the soldiers. Hopefully, they wouldn’t be too mad at them sneaking in.

If he squinted, just enough, he could see the cherry blossoms beginning to bloom in various places around the mountain. They weren’t fully out, taking over the treeline in vibrant shades of pink, more… scattered. Fresh. He didn’t really buy into much of the general symbolism, but it did feel fitting, like a sign that life was destined to go on. Like that, a small amount of the weight on his soul was lifted.

Eventually, Karausma and Bitch Sensei joined them inside, waking the others up with their presence. At that point, Nagisa returned to his own desk, not wanting to draw any more attention to himself. For a moment, Karasuma just regarded the class in silence, before stepping up.

“I imagine there are some things you’ll find hard to swallow,” he begun. “You’ll have all eyes on you for a while, I’m afraid, and I’m sure they’ll be asking you to keep quiet on confidential matters. I’ll do my utmost to protect you, of course, but allow me to apologise to you in advance.” Karasuma finished his sentence with a bow.

That was to be expected, Nagisa supposed. He hadn’t really done well with the cameras before, but he could maybe learn to ignore it. There’d be something else for the world to turn their eyes to, eventually, more interesting than _them_ anyway. They wouldn’t be Korosensei’s students, if something as fickle as the _media_ were to scare them off.

“Karasuma Sensei, it’s fine” Maehara said. We’ll do our best to get this settled peacefully, too.”

“We don’t want to complicate things for you.” Okano added.

“In return, we do have one request.” Kataoka stood up, looking around the rest of the class, before turning back to Karasuma. “Please let us attend Kunugigaoka’s graduation ceremony today. Our days spent battling with the main campus are yet another precious memory we made with Korosensei.”

Karasuma nodded. “Sure, I’ll arrange it. After all, that’s why I’m here.”

Isogai, too, got to his feet. “All students: stand up!” Well, although they’d graduated, he was still their class representative. Nobody argued about getting to their feet, taking the signal to bow in respect. “Karasuma Sensei, Bitch Sensei, you taught us so much. Thank you!”

“Thank you!” Everyone repeated.

The tension snapped. Before Nagisa could even stand back up again, Nakamura had him in a headlock. He didn’t have the energy for a might, so he didn’t attempt to break out of it, though still struggled against her hold so she didn’t get bored and try anything _worse_.

“ _So_ , Nagisa kun,” Nakamura said, “look at _you_ being our top assassin in the end, huh?”

He had it in him to flush, somehow. “Well-“

“Bet you’re excited for graduation. We have to wear our formal uniforms, you know. I can’t wait to see you all dolled up in a skirt!”

“W-what skirt?!” Nagisa protested, actually trying to wiggle out of her grip.  

“Aw, don’t be shy _Nagisa_ ~,” Karma laughed, patting his hair. “If you don’t want to wear it to the ceremony, you can always wear it at home later~”

Nagisa squeaked. “What exactly do you mean by _that_?!”

Karma didn’t get the chance to tell him, _exactly what he meant by that_ , because graduation would be starting soon. Due to everything, they couldn’t have it on the main campus, so everyone was lead instead to the local civic centre, where correct uniform (including _trousers_ ) were handed out. Somehow, all of that was more surreal, than their assassination.

Eyes barely focusing on the stage, Nagisa sat patiently amongst the rest of their class, waiting for his name to be called. Despite everything, they were still the last to receive their official diplomas. When he’d been transferred down to E Class in the first place, Nagisa had understood that he wouldn’t be graduating at all, due to the existing policies. He hadn’t had a hope at all, the idea of stretching his grades up to fiftieth in the entire year impossible. But, a _lot_ of impossible things had happened that year.

“Shiota Nagisa!”

Nagisa readily stood up. “Yes!”

He made his way up to the stage, where the principal was waiting. “You’ve got a sharp look in your eyes these days,” he said. “The result of your teacher’s instruction, I’m sure.”

“Yes, sir.” Nagisa said, and then chewed his lip. “And please don’t overdo things.” He politely accepted his “Take care, now.”

He hadn’t really thought about what this meant, for his position. Surely, once the drama about the earth potentially being in danger died down, eyes would inevitably turn to the school. Nagisa just hoped he didn’t take it out on Asano, or anything. As far as he knew, though, their bond had been healing, if only just a little.

Before he knew it, the ceremony was done. There had been a few of the necessary speeches and such, but Nagisa hadn’t taken any of them in really. All he’d been able to think was that this chapter, this _goal_ in the back of his mind, was over now. Finally, Nagisa had completed compulsory education.

Naturally, when they were dismissed from their seats, Nagisa drifted over next to Karma. They’d tended to do that, even before Daichi. Nagisa didn’t have much of an explanation for it, other than it just being comfortable. Or else, it was just something that _was_ , something he’d decided not to question. So, they mutually approached each other, brandishing their matching diplomas. 

“Glad that’s over,” Karma said, walking casually towards the exit.

Nagisa looked up at him. “Really?”

He shrugged. “They dragged it on a b- hey!”

Following his eyes, Nagisa realised what he’d spotted. His own face broke out into a grin, when he spotted his parents in the crowd of people, his mother holding Daichi. At least he didn’t look too traumatised by their nightly absence, though Nagisa still suddenly felt bad. He reminded himself that it was definitely just a onetime thing, though. No way could he ever leave Daichi behind, to go off and do something so dangerous.

Karma rushed over first, clearly b lining for the child. Though Nagisa couldn’t blame him. It wasn’t like they’d bought him any formal clothes (there was no need, and the nightmare of trying to get something over his head just wasn’t worth it), but Daichi had been dressed in one of the nicer outfits, at least, one that didn’t just look like straight up pyjamas.

“Heya Daichi,” Karma said, holding out his arms. “Come to see us graduate, huh?”

Before his mother could actually hand him over, Daichi started wiggling, and then his lips began to spread, stretching out into what _looked_ like a smile. Nagisa couldn’t help but stop dead in his tracks, his gasp catching in his throat. It wasn’t as if Nagisa really paid much attention to child development stuff, so he didn’t know what age babies tended to start smiling at, but he just _knew_ it was genuine. When he came closer, just enough for Daichi’s eyes to be able to see him clearly, his face neutralised for a moment, before the smile returned, wider and more definitive than before. It was one of the single best things Nagisa had ever seen, the sweetest expression on Daichi’s face, and if his tears weren’t all dried up, he probably would have cried seeing it. He couldn’t help but think: life went on.

Karma, too, blinked in confusion, before grinning wildly back, taking him into his arms. “Yeah? We’re happy to see you _too._ ”

Fully aware it was kind of a weird thing to observe, Nagisa couldn’t hold back his thoughts about Karma’s voice. There were plenty of tones he tended to use, the more serious one, his groggy morning voice, his slightly sing song teasing… The way Karma chose to speak to Daichi was most like the latter, though far softer. Honestly, Nagisa could close his eyes and listen to it for days.

And then he opened his eyes for real, taking in the situation. “Mum, Dad… Why are you here _together_?”

Beside him, Karma coughed lightly. “I’m going to go catch up with the others.”

As much as Nagisa would have appreciated the stability of having Karma at his side right then, he did have to appreciate the thought. This was probably a conversation Nagisa really did have to have with his parents, alone. His heart did kind of ache, though, eyes following Karma’s path over to Terasaka. Knowing Karma, he was probably darting around, showing everyone Daichi’s new ‘skill’.

Nagisa’s father cleared his throat. “At the end of last month, that monster – your teacher – paid me a visit. Just after I came to visit you in hospital. Both he and your mother told me how hard you worked, how determined you were in making it this far.” He looked down at Nagisa, then, and smiled.

“Your father and I have talked it over,” his mother said. “We’ll follow your example and work hard to give us another try.”

“H-huh?” Nagisa couldn’t be sure if he’d heard that right. He really did find more tears to let out, then. For years, those were the words he’d so desperately wanted to hear. It was the very reason why he insisted that everyone call him by his given name. And all of this was Korosensei’s doing?

His father laughed, patting him on the back. “Nagisa, you’re making it seem like you’re sad about this!”

Nagisa could tell he didn’t mean it, but he still blinked up, accepting the handkerchief his mother offered. “N-no, I’m just… really happy.” His shoulders started heaving with sobs again. “Y-you’re serious?”

“We’ve discussed this a lot,” his mother smiled.

“I’m sorry,” his father picked up. “And I did do a lot of thinking, for a while, about family… It’s not right that I put this _distance_ between us. I feel like I’ve missed out on so much, and,” he paused, “I’d like to know my grandson, if you’ll allow it.”

Nagisa’s heart burst into pieces. Well, he’d been meaning to cry over that. “He _smiled_ at me,” he sobbed, nonsensically. “He’s getting so b-big now.”

His father smiled knowingly. “Mmm, and in the blink of an eye, _he’ll_ be graduating Junior High."

“ _No_ ,” Nagisa protested, through a half laugh. He didn’t even want to think about that inevitability. “I should get back to the others,” he said eventually, looking over his shoulder.

“Okay,” his mother nodded. “We’ll see you back home.”

Nagisa went, then, feeling completely light headed. The rest of the class were all gathered in generally the same area, rather than with their parents. It didn’t take him long to locate red hair amongst the group, and he began to float over.

“E Class, a word!”

Turning sharply, it was indeed the very similar to the last time they’d faced so many reporters. Now it seemed their movements were organised, and they’d come in _packs_. It was a good thing, at least, that right then, Nagisa felt like he could take on the world and then some. The flash of cameras shouldn’t intimidate him. 

Karaasuma jumped in front of a pushier one, creating a barrier with his body. “This place is off limits!”

Of course, they paid no attention.

“Tell us about the monster!”

“How do you feel right now?”

“Did you really kill him?”

“You vultures! Spare a thought for the student’s feelings, for once!” Karasuma said, and then turned away. “Outside, everyone! Quickly! There’s a bus standing by outside the main gate!”

Despite his best efforts to contain it, a couple of guys still managed to get through, breaking into a charge towards them. Before they could, though, a couple of Asano’s ‘minions’, the Virtuosos, stepped in and held them back. Like he’d planned this all alone, Asano himself walked through the centre, and with a click of the fingers, a tarp thing was covering the class’ heads. 

“What the hell are you doing?!” A reporter complained.

“Quit meddling with our coverage!”

Paying them no attention, he led the way, and they began to walk in formation. Taking the signal, Nagisa and the rest of the class followed. At least that was the issue of how they were going to get onto the bus finally solved.

“You quit meddling with our moment in the sun!” Seo retorted.

“Our ties and our relationship end today,” Asano looked back over his shoulder, “for the most part, but we are still students who studied at the same school. To abandon you now would bring shame upon your ruler- me.”

They reached the bus efficiently that way, without the reporters getting so much as an extra word in. One by one, with their help, everyone boarded the bus. Nagisa himself hung back, watching the others get to safety. Immediately in front of him was Karma, who had paused for a moment to exchange words with Asano. Nagisa couldn’t quite make out what it was, from where he was standing, but frankly he didn’t really want to know.

 “C’mon,” Seo said, giving Nagisa a shove.  “You’re bringing up the rear!”

Nagisa did as he said, taking one step up and onto the bus. He did turn back, though, and met Asano’s eye. Once again, it felt like it would have been right to have some kind of an exchange, a conversation to spell out everything he felt. But even if the situation had been right for that kind of thing, Nagisa probably wouldn’t have taken the opportunity.

“Off you go,” Asano said instead, but there was a great amount of warmth in both his tone and expression. A kind of fondness, even.

There was nothing left to say, so Nagisa just flushed slightly, shooting Asano his best attempt at an equally warm smile. The doors of the bus automatically closed, after that, and the vehicle began to slowly pull away. Nagisa straightened, finding his way to the seat next to Karma. He slumped down in it, practically all the energy in his body draining away from him.

At least Daichi was still awake, apparently having found the change in environment interesting. He was nowhere near big enough to hold his own head up yet, but Karma had him propped up that way slightly, so his face wasn’t just directed towards the ceiling. Though, he wasn’t doing the smiling thing either, eyes focusing on something or other.

Nagisa turned away to look out of the window, and tears streamed down his face. This, seeing the world go by, felt like a real goodbye. It wasn’t sad or regretful, though, just… bittersweet. The bus kept going, taking them out of the main town. Nagisa hadn’t thought to question where Karasuma was sending them, until they pulled into a strange building he’d never seen before.

Out of habit, Nagisa pulled out his mobile phone. He hoped that Ritsu would still be able to stick around, despite their graduation. Somehow, though, he was _sure_ she would find a way to outsmart her creators once again. She appeared on his screen, not saying much, but instead pulling up a map. Nagisa swallowed when he realised where they were. The Ministry Of Defence.

When what looked like two soldiers got onto the bus with them, Nagisa felt a spike of fear. The only comfort was that he trusted Karasuma not to send them straight into slaughter. Still, Nagisa had known that really, there would be consequences for going against the government. He just had to hope it wouldn’t be too harsh. The soldiers didn’t give much away with their expressions, anyway.

They were lead together into the building, without much of a chance to stop and ask what was going on. After last night, Nagisa wasn’t sure about the others, but much of the fight had left him already. He would just accept whatever his fate was going to be. No matter what, showing up last night had been more than worth it.

Almost hilariously, they were told to wait in what looked like a classroom. Nagisa supposed that for a job like Karasuma’s, you probably had to go through a lot of training. It seemed that despite graduation, they were still stuck in a classroom. The set up of the desks was different to _their_ classroom, so nobody really defaulted to their usual positions, simply filing in one by one. So they sat down, simply waiting for next instruction. At least Daichi wasn’t making a fuss about any of it, finally fast asleep at the warmth of Karma’s chest.

After a little while of waiting, Karasuma strode into the room, pushing a large metal suitcase with him. They kept their silence as he made his way to the front of the room, as if to address them. Some other colleagues followed behind, rolling more and more inside.

“As promised,” he said, and then opened the case to reveal more paper notes of money than Nagisa had ever seen in his life. “Despite the government’s plans, you did get the killing blow, and therefore qualify for the bounty. Also,” he smiled a little, “you can call it hush money.” He bowed, and then left the room.

Nagisa’s jaw was almost on the floor. Though he didn’t rush to the money like some of the others, his eyes went very wide. That much money, being just a number was okay, but actually seeing it in front of him was almost beyond comprehension.  

“Oh man!” Maehara exclaimed loudly. “I’m gonna buy-“

“We _can’t_.” Isogai cut him off, and then exhaled. “Everyone, what I mean is, I don’t think Korosensei would want us to rely on so much money.”

Nakamura gulped. “B-but… The _money_.”        

“He’s right.” Kataoka nodded. “Korosensei taught us the honour of making our own way in the world. “

“I think we should keep a sum of it,” Isogai added. “Just enough for some small things.” His eyes darted around the room. “All those in favour?”

Listening to their points, Nagisa found himself raising his own hand. They were right, to live a senseless life of luxury would be almost disrespectful to Korosensei’s memory. It was their responsibility to live on, now, taking his guidance in stride. Somehow, he decided the near two billion yen he was owed didn’t seem so important.

“Wait a minute,” Maehara said, and pulled the others close to say something in a whisper.

The only ones still sitting, and thus out of ear shot, Karma and Nagisa automatically shot each other a look of confusion. Karma was kind of incapacitated with a snoozing baby in his arms, so Nagisa was just about to stand up to see what was going on, when they turned back to them.

“So,” Nakamura begun, “we talked it over.”   

“We think that both of you should keep your cuts,” Isogai said.

Again, Nagisa’s eyes darted to Karma’s. “W- _why_?”                  

Terasaka scoffed. “You two just _had_ to go and make a kid.”      

“It just makes the most sense, and it’s not like we didn’t _earn_ the money,” Maehara said.

“The reason we, as a class, are giving it up is because we don’t _need_ this kind of money,” Isogai continued. “We’d risk becoming complacent. But both of you have a reason. Korosensei wouldn’t want anybody to _suffer_ just for honour’s sake.”

Kurahashi nodded. “Besides, aren’t babies meant to be crazy expensive?”

“And you’d barely have time to spend with him if you got jobs on top of school,” Sugino said.

Isogai smiled. “We trust that both of you wouldn’t overuse the money. We just think that it would be just as wrong to deny him anything based on our decision.”  

“Korosensei made Daichan an honorary member,” Kayano added. “We could argue about whether that means he gets a cut or not, but just in case.”

Not entirely sure what to make of any of that, Nagisa found himself looking at Karma _again_. They communicated with their eyes, then. On the one hand, Nagisa agreed with the classes’ sentiments that they shouldn’t live off lumps of money, but on the other… It would be nice, to have that kind of a security. When Daichi inevitably grew up and wanted to experience the world, Nagisa would feel just as bad saying _no_ due to lack of money.

“Alright,” Karma shrugged. “If that’s what you think.”

Nagisa nodded. “Only for Daichi’s wellbeing.”

They decided on some other things, after that. They wouldn’t give _all_ the money away. The others were keeping just enough to qualify as a small boost, for themselves. But it wouldn’t all go back to the government. They decided to donate some of it, to a few places, but most importantly, to try and buy their mountain. It was bound to be made off limits, otherwise.

Nobody kept them afterwards, so Nagisa walked through his front door that evening, suddenly a billionaire. “We’re back!”

“Welcome,” his mother said, decidedly in a better mood. “I’m nearly done with dinner.”

It felt too normal. “I-Is dad not here?” Nagisa realised, after scanning around the apartment.

She pressed her lips together. “Nagisa… We can’t just go straight back to living together. Your father and I are going to take it slower, at least at first.”

He did understand that, and decided to try his best to hide the minor disappointment. Aside from that, everything else was normal. They didn’t talk about the assassination, over dinner. Even afterwards, it was just light conversation, before the same routine. Nagisa and Karma went about their evening like any other night before, bathing Daichi and changing him fresh, before feeding him and returning to his bedroom to put him down.

Except, Nagisa hesitated. He was holding an almost asleep Daichi in his arms, yet when he looked at the crib, it seemed like the worst thing imaginable. Perhaps it was wrong, to treat his son like some sort of safety blanket, but Nagisa just couldn’t stand the thought of letting go of him. At least for this one night.

“W-would it be bad?” Nagisa looked over at the bed, studying it.

Karma gave him his answer, stripping off and lying down in it. The debate was soon over, and Nagisa came over himself, settling down carefully. With Daichi lying between them, they couldn’t sleep as close as they had been, but he didn’t mind that. It would be really bad, to accidentally overwhelm him in their sleep.

For a while, Nagisa just watched Daichi. He didn’t seem to mind not being in his own bed, so to speak, dropping off without too much fuss. Though he knew it would only last for a few hours, Nagisa examined how peaceful he was, innocent to the horrors of the night before. His eyes raked up to Karma, then. Nagisa had to squint to see it, but what he found was the subtle trail of tears rolling down his cheeks.

Had Karma cried, yesterday? Nagisa had been so busy sobbing in that moment himself, that he hadn’t really noticed. It made sense, though. Karma was never the type to publically share his emotions. In the darkness, Nagisa wasn’t sure if he knew he’d been spotted, or not. On a slight whim, he reached up, collecting one as it fell.

Instantly, Karma’s hand gripped his wrist, like an instinct, but it softened just as quickly. This, Nagisa realised, wasn’t something they needed to talk about. When Karma’s hand slid up, covering his in a hold, Nagisa didn’t move away. It comforted him, too, made him remember that no matter what, he wasn’t alone in this. He drifted off that night without really realising it was happening.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You asked, I delivered. 
> 
> This chapter was very almost delayed by Brendon Urie :')


	39. High School Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Karma and Nagisa prepare for their first day of high school

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alt chapter title: Karma Gets A Boner Time

Surprisingly, it was the kicking that woke Nagisa up first, before the crying. Unlike being bothered by sound, which made him hazily aware of reality, being whacked was sharper, more alarming. He peeled one eye open, both loving and hating each of these new developments. On the one hand, _ouch_ , on the other, it made him happy, that Daichi was beginning to do more than just _exist_.

Beside him, Karma yawned, leaning up on one elbow. “Mmm? Four and a half.”

It took Nagisa a moment, before he registered what Karma was talking about. He sat up, pulling a restless Daichi with him. “ _Really_? That long?”

Karma rolled over onto his front. “New record, right?”

Another development Nagisa was happy about. Daichi had progressively been sleeping longer and longer at night, halving the amount of times he needed feeding. He wasn’t entirely sure if it was the right thing to do, but Nagisa knew he was hardly being _starved_ , so he’d decided not to worry about waking Daichi up every two or so hours. Plus, he was appreciating the small amounts of extra sleep. Even if it did mean that Daichi was far less chilled out during the day.

In fact, he’d recently discovered the advantages that came with seeing the world, and as such, Daichi had begun fussing whenever he was put flat on his back. Though Nagisa held him so he wasn’t actually putting any weight on his feet, Daichi’s face broke out into a wide smile when he was positioned in a sort of stand. Despite the early hour, Nagisa couldn’t help but smile back at him.

Though he groaned lowly into the pillow, Karma looked as if he was actually going to get up, for just a moment. He reached out, gently patting Daichi’s back. “Mornin’”

It would be hard, to readjust to any kind of school routine. The slightly later mornings for the last couple of weeks had kept him less groggy. At least, physically. Around the country, most kids were celebrating the time off, preparing excitedly for the new school year. Even without Daichi to consider, neither of them, nor the rest of their friends, had done much celebrating. Aside from lying low until the media coverage died down, Nagisa was still _mourning_.

But even from his bed, he could see the cherry blossom trees in full bloom, getting ready to shed their flowers. Which only meant one thing, that it was time to try his best to move forwards. Of course, it wasn’t going to be the same. Nagisa was starting a new school, outside of Kunugigaoka, and he wouldn’t know anybody there. Though, the prospect of making friends wasn’t what scared him the most.

It was all over his student information. The blessings of secondary gender irrelevance were over, at High School. Generally, if you hadn’t presented as anything by fifteen, you were a beta. Though he’d heard of people trying to hide it, it was all over Nagisa’s medical records. Until the day he died, from now on, he had an ‘O’ plastered right beside his name.

He knew he shouldn’t get so het up about it, considering nothing bad had actually happened yet, but intuitively he just had a bad feeling. Perhaps it had been the letter that arrived asking whether he’d prefer to wear either the male or the female variation of the uniform (which thankfully he’d kept far out of the reaches of Karma’s vision – lest he be teased for a lifetime). Keisetsu would be slightly better than a public school, though. He’d heard the horror stories about those.

Before he could think too much more about it, Daichi’s face fell, like he just remembered the reason he woke up. By the looks of things, considering Karma’s eyes were closed once again, Nagisa was going to have to deal with it himself. Not wanting to leave it long enough for serious tears, Nagisa moved Daichi into more of a hold, and pulled himself out of bed.

By the time he returned, with a now fed and more settled Daichi, Karma had already gotten himself dressed. As it turned out, the Kungigaoka High uniform was pretty similar to their old one, so it wasn’t too much of a shock to the eyes. What _would_ be a shock, however, was turning separate directions once they got out of the door. But it was no use living in the past.

When he pulled on his own (and yes, male) uniform, Nagisa’s eye caught the book Korosensei had given each of them. Of course, he’d flicked through it, taking in a page or so at a time. He hadn’t been able to handle any more than that, not just because of the twinge of sadness it produced, but that thing was _ridiculously_ detailed. Some pages were like sifting through academic papers, though in another sense it was comforting. The book was endless, which meant Korosensei’s presence was also endless.

“Nagisa?” Karma was suddenly very close to him, presumably to get his attention or something, but it still caused him to jump.

“O-oh,” Nagisa replied, fixing his eyes on the floor. “Did I space out?”

Karma really _was_ standing close, close enough Nagisa could practically feel his breath. “I _said,_ ‘do you want to get him dressed’?”

It took Nagisa a moment to figure out what Karma was on about. It was hard, when there was so little space between. His head was spinning, like he was being shocked with electricity, charged and held in place by being so close. Deep down, Nagisa knew that feeling like this wasn’t _normal_. But there was a small voice, right in his depths, that argued that _nothing_ about the pair of them was normal. So he shouldn’t worry.

“It’s okay,” Nagisa said, forcing himself to take a half step backwards. Turning his attention to his son would definitely be the best thing to do. “I don’t think Mum’s going out anywhere.”

He nodded, shifting Daichi slightly in his arms, and Nagisa just knew it was time to go. Out of the corner of his eye, he caught his reflection in a small mirror, checking his uniform over one last time before bending down to pick up his bag. After giving a somewhat interested Daichi a quick kiss to the forehead, Nagisa straightened himself.

“I’ll see you after school,” he said, and turned, ready to go out of the door.

“Have a good day,” Karma called after him, like a wife sending her husband off to work.

Keisetsu was pretty far away, out of Kunugigaoka. With an entire train journey to take, Nagisa had to leave significantly earlier than Karma did. He hadn’t exactly _asked_ , but he was sure Karma didn’t have much of a problem with it. Once Nagisa had made his way onto the train, the somewhat melancholy twinge inside him grew, almost like homesickness. Perhaps because it was a new environment, rather than the same class building that had become like a second home, but Nagisa found himself missing Daichi a lot more.

Though he’d been there to take the entrance exams before, the building still felt incredibly foreign. Nagisa swallowed, and tried to force himself to remember he wouldn’t be the only one. The first day of high school was a big deal for _most_ people. When Nagisa found his way to right place for the start of year ceremony, he was surrounded by it.

It wasn’t like he really _meant_ to, but Nagisa couldn’t help but take analyse his surroundings, as teachers gave their various speeches. Like he’d suspected, many were on edge, visibly nervous, though he noticed a few students grouped together. Already friends from attending the same junior high, he guessed, though he couldn’t be entirely sure. Though it was still only the first day, at first judgement most seemed pretty clean cut in appearance. It was no wonder this was the school his mother wanted him to attend.

Once the ceremony was done, and Nagisa followed everyone else to the classrooms, his next task was finding the right seat. Perhaps that could be his strategy for making friends. Back in 3E, he’d ended up pretty close to all the people who sat around him, but he supposed that didn’t mean much. Their class shared the kind of bond nothing else could replicate. At the very least, he should make an effort to get _along_ with the people around him. 

“Hi!” A dark haired girl on his right declared. “Ooo, looks like we’re desk buddies!”

A bit more enthusiastic than Nagisa had expected, but she gave off a nice, warm feeling. “N-nice to meet you.” He could do this. One friend already, and without even really trying. “My name’s Shiota Nagisa-“

She blinked, clearly doing a double take as confusion flew across her expression, before it settled again. “Nice. Higashi Haia.”

Nagisa sighed, guessing it was because he’d used the male form of ‘I’. Going through the whole gender thing again was bound to happen, but he didn’t have to be happy about it. At least she wasn’t necessarily dwelling on it. He just got the feeling, examining her, that she was just generally a bubbly person. Or, it didn’t seem like she was playing it up.

“You know,” she said, “I feel like I know you from somewhere. Did you go to junior high with one of my friends or something?”

Dread set in, but Nagisa decided to answer her honestly. “I went to Kunugigaoka.”

The girl directly in front turned around. “Kunugigaoka? Like the school that where they killed that monster?”

Higashi gasped, clapping a hand over her mouth dramatically. “How scary!” 

Nagisa wanted to correct her, to shout from the roof tops that Korosensei was _not_ the monster the media had portrayed him to be. But he couldn’t. It didn’t matter that the assassination was over with, they still had a confidentiality agreement. Perhaps even until the day he died, Nagisa wasn’t allowed to tell anybody the full truth.

“It wasn’t so bad,” Nagisa managed, trying to ignore the way the rest of the class were staring at him like an animal in a zoo.

“Weird,” the girl in front of him said, turning back around to face the front.

Leaning over her desk, Higashi reached forwards, poking the girl. “You shouldn’t be so harsh, Kita chan. Shiota kun must’ve been through so much already!”

She turned back. “Sorry.”

Somehow, Nagisa guessed that she didn’t really mean it. Thankfully, though, their homeroom teacher walked in, taking the spotlight away from him. At least Nagisa could cope with plain school. The routine wasn’t far off what he’d expected; stand, introduce self, sit back down again. He was sure at a school like Keisetsu, the pressure and hard work would begin soon, though. At least they were being eased in.

He tried his best to concentrate. At least the good thing about going to this school in particular was the free ride into university. So long as he passed well, at least, he wouldn’t have to worry about entrance exams in a few years, since the school was already attached. Still, regardless of the security, Nagisa was hardly the type to slack off. He was going to do as well as he possibly could.

Without much chance for any other interactions, Nagisa took in the lessons, which were far more like introductions to what they’d be studying than actual lessons, right up until the lunch bell rung. It took Nagisa a moment to register why everyone was getting up, before realising he wasn’t a part of some out of bounds side campus anymore, confined to just eating in the classroom. Being excluded for so long, Nagisa had almost forgotten what normal life was like.

Not that he’d ever really participated in much lunch time socialisation. For the first part of his first year of junior high, of course, Nagisa had just sat amongst his classmates, chiming in at fleeting moments of conversation. And then he’d made friends with Karma. It had been summer, and Karma wasn’t one for large crowds of people, so Nagisa had ended up sneaking to the roof with him, until the weather got colder and they drifted apart. Back then, he knew he’d been giddy, he’d felt _special_ , even. It was embarrassing.

Nagisa really should have been paying attention, rather than getting lost in thoughts of Karma. He’d been so dazed that he clearly was blocking the way out of the classroom. Though he jumped a little, when he was l-ightly shoved out of the way, Nagisa could hardly blame them. He just about broke out of his confusion enough to get into the hallway, before he noticed a hand come down right above his shoulder.

“So, Shiota chan, was it?”

Tentatively, he looked up at the taller guy. He looked about average, dark hair and dark eyes, but they were gleaming with something predatory. Nagisa gulped, sensing this wasn’t about to be a friendly chat. It made sense, logically, by all appearances Nagisa was an easy target. At least he was more than capable of handling bullies. But there was something different, something that wasn’t entirely violent. He leaned forward, wrinkling his nose in what Nagisa realised was a _sniff_. Right then, he realised his mistake. He hadn’t even thought about wearing scent blocker, that morning.

The guy turned, gesturing someone who was clearly his friend. “Say, Kaito, you ever seen a male omega before?”

“Why,” his eyes winded, “I haven’t. _Wow_ , you’re cute.”

What? _Cute_? Sure, he’d been called that teasingly, but… “U-uhm, I’ll be going now,” he tried to slip out.

“Hey,” the first guy said, “not so fast. Just relax. I’ve never seen one of you before.”

For the second time in that day, Nagisa felt like a zoo exhibit. A part of him wanted to punch the guy in the nose or something, but that wouldn’t get him anywhere other than detention. There was a better way to deal with this, to just smile and nod until they got bored and found something more interesting to do. 

“That’s nice,” Nagisa went with. “Excuse-“

He cocked his head. “Is it true that you have a pussy down there like a girl?”

Before Nagisa could yelp and find somewhere to bury himself six feet under at _that_ question, somebody else cleared his throat.

“You’re only asking that because you’ve never seen anything _remotely_ like that before, Oshiro kun.”

He pulled away from Nagisa like hot coal. “A-aino senpai…”

The boy in question quirked an eyebrow. “Perhaps you should run along, before lunch runs out, huh?”

They excused themselves, without further argument, giving Nagisa a moment to breathe. Nagisa couldn’t help but flush, not so much embarrassed by their discussion, but by the whole ‘damsel in distress’ act. He’d been trained in assassination for a whole year, he didn’t need somebody else to defend him. It had just stunned him, a little, to be spoken to like _that_ by other guys.

“Shiota kun, did I hear?” The guy, clearly an upperclassman by the way they’d spoken to him, said. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” Nagisa got out. “I’m fine, thank you.”

He smiled, light brown hair slightly masking his eyes. “Let me walk you to the nurse’s, just to be sure nobody else bothers you. I’m only a beta myself, but it should be enough.”

Nagisa didn’t want help, but he knew it would be rude to reject it. He just hoped that whatever scent blocker the nurse happened to have would be strong enough. Though, he knew he couldn’t hide himself forever, with everything going round about Korosensei and the assassination to less attention he brought upon himself, the better.

“So,” he said, after a few paces. “First day, huh? I found it pretty daunting.”

“Please call me Nagisa,” he said, out of habit. It was more important right then than it had been before, though. Now that his parents were getting back together, or at least there was a high chance of it, it was more likely than ever that his family name could change back, creating an awkward situation for everyone.

He paused in his steps, before shrugging. “Only if you call me ‘Rin kun’, then. Let’s be on equal footing.”

Looking up at him, Nagisa determined that there was only pure intention. “Okay,” Nagisa said, and let him lead the way.

* * *

Karma stood on the edge of the Kunugigaoka High School campus, hands shoved in his pockets. Just outside the main gate, a few reporters were lined up, figuratively pressing their noses right up against the glass. None of them had dared come up to him when he passed, though, so they couldn’t be _that_ desperate. Most of everything was starting to blow over, anyway.

Catching sight of the class list, displayed clearly for everyone to see, a smirk grew across his face. Though it had always been his plan to work against Asano and his followers, it was going to be easier, now he was assigned to class ‘1-1’ with them. He needed to be kept on his toes, so he was happy with the arrangement. At least, focusing his energy on coming out on top seemed like the right thing to do, the path he was meant to follow or whatever.

That didn’t mean he had to have an _entirely_ clean slate. Any kind of ceremony was bound to be boring, anyway, so who could really blame him for skipping. He sauntered off to the right classroom, predictably finding it to be completely empty. Right then, he realised he had a choice to make. Usually, he’d go straight to the back of the room. Not only did that mean that he wasn’t in the teacher’s direct vision, but it was a small vantage point over the rest of the class. On the flip side, though, he imagined Asano’s face. It would be making more of a statement.

Predictably, when the others filtered in to find Karma in the first seat, right at the front of the classroom. He didn’t react to their confusion and gasps of ‘that’s Asano kun’s spot’ externally, though it did wash over him like a pleasant melody. In fact, he acted as indifferent as he could, allowing them to gawk.

“Very funny, Akabane kun,” Asano himself said, when he came in, followed by his other minions. “You’ve made your point now.”

Karma looked up at him casually. “No matter how you look at it, I can sit here. I scored above you, fair and square. Besides, my name’s first in the roll book.”

For a moment, Asano looked like steam was about to rise from his shoulders, a sight that meant success in Karma’s eyes. He straightened, though, quickly neutralising, and sat down on the chair beside him, the number two spot. Though it was important for Karma to look uninterested, he did keep an eye out for the nervous expressions of Asano’s cronies.

“Just so you’re aware,” Asano begun coldly from his side, “I _will_ be taking the top spot back.”

“Well,” Karma said, and leant back in his chair. “I guess you can _try_.”

Before the threats could deepen, their new teacher walked in. She looked mostly soft, serious yet harmless, and it was hard to not take an instant disliking to her. After all, Karma had sworn off teacher kind in general, before the E Class. He supposed he should give the woman a chance, but he really didn’t want to. Compared to the kind of year Korosensei had given them, anybody would pale.

“Class,” she cleared her throat, after going through the general housekeeping stuff, “let’s kick this year off a pop quiz.”

That just sealed the deal. Still, Karma could play. It was a chance to prove that beating Asano had not just been a fluke, a stroke of good luck. As it turned out, they ended up scoring the exact same, so it wasn’t as much of an opportunity to shine as he’d hoped. Interesting, however. Aside from a few jabs he got in here and there, the rest of the day was disappointingly uneventful. It was just… school.

Karma was tapping his foot, by the time the final bell rang out. He didn’t bother waiting around, rushing off as soon as he could. There wasn’t really that much reason for doing so, other than minor concern for Daichi’s wellbeing. Though, they’d managed well enough during the end of junior high, and he was too young to really miss them. That didn’t mean he wasn’t growing up too fast for Karma’s liking, though.

By the time he actually got back to Nagisa’s home, he estimated he had over an hour before Nagisa would show himself. With no actual homework on the first day, Karma just hoped Daichi was in a good enough mood to keep him entertained. Or, it was more mutual entertainment. It still felt like treading on thin ice, though, as he knocked on the door, especially without Nagisa at his side.

He didn’t really focus on Nagisa’s mother, though, when she opened the door. Daichi’s lips broke into a full faced smile upon seeing him, and he let out a couple of high pitched noises, squirming energetically. Karma’s natural tunnel vision was engaged, and he swiftly reached out, taking Daichi into his own arms. At least remembering the be polite, he slipped his shoes off, toeing them into a somewhat lined up position. What next? Usually, Nagisa was with him, and they just disappeared off into the bedroom.

“I made some tea,” Nagisa’s mother cleared her throat.

Of course, Karma knew it was far more than just a statement, or a kind gesture. Having somewhat sussed out a few things from Nagisa’s past over the years, there was nothing Karma would like more than to give her the full piece of his mind, but he couldn’t. For starters, they’d have to find a new baby sitter, but he also sensed that it wasn’t what Nagisa would want. For him, Karma would keep his silence.

Karma followed her over to the table, sitting so that Daichi was mostly propped up in his lap. In a sense, it was like having a shield of cuteness to protect him. She didn’t immediately start saying whatever she was clearly planning to, simply sitting opposite him. Though he didn’t really drink tea that often, Karma took his cup, slowly sipping the hot liquid.

“What are your intentions towards Nagisa?”

She asked it, plain and simple, out of nowhere. It was so fast that Karma was stunned for a moment, not even sure where to begin with it. For a brief second, Karma wondered if he was just being too obvious with his feelings. He’d assumed that Nagisa’s incredible perception was a learned skill, but it was possible that he’d learnt it from somewhere else too. At least, it certainly seemed like an interrogation suited for a potential partner.

Karma forced himself to straighten. “What _kind_ of intentions?”

She sighed. “I’m not blind, Akabane kun. So I’ll ask again. What are your intentions?”

“We’re friends,” he said. “And we’re looking after Daichan here.”

Little did she know, that’s what he’d decided months ago, before Daichi was even born. Really, whatever he felt for Nagisa didn’t really matter. There were bigger fish to fry, other than _feelings_. She regarded him with a slight curiosity, like she was trying to study his face.

“Just don’t do anything stupid.”

Karma took another sip of his tea. “Of course not.”

What he meant, of course, was ‘ _no promises_ ’. It played on his mind for the rest of the evening, though, which made him feel no less than pathetic. Though it was fine before Nagisa actually got home, considering he had Daichi to take his mind from it, it felt like a tonne of bricks the moment he was alone.

One of the few times he actually _was_ alone nowadays was during showers. He’d never really been the type to spend a significant amount of time in there, but his mind was racing. He couldn’t put a finger on why it bothered him so much. There was absolutely no chance of anything happening between them that would inspire such a conversation, but… Karma was at a loss, a feeling that itched underneath the surface of his skin.

When he returned, fresh and fully dressed, the first thing he noticed was that Daichi was taking a bit of a nap, in his actual crib for once rather than between them on Nagisa’s bed. A long day for him too, probably. Then he noticed the next thing, which was Nagisa sprawled out on the floor, in some kind of yoga position. Karma had to do a double take, before Nagisa started moving, pumping his hips in _thrusts_. Out of nowhere, he felt a kind of painful weight, and then twitch, in his lower stomach.

Karma’s only choice was to dive for the bed, grabbing the closest pillow to position over the top of his crotch. He had only his good reflexes to thank, that he made it into that position before Nagisa could open his eyes and notice him.

“Oh, hey Karma,” he said sweetly.  

Despite the conversation, his face was still screwed up in concentration, and Karma had a front row view of his _ass_. “What are you _doing_?” The question slipped out of him.

To his minor disappointment, Nagisa left the position, standing up properly. It was for the best, though, before he was left in a _situation_ that wouldn’t go away on its own. Karma attempted to focus on the wall behind Nagisa, knowing looking him in the eye would only make it worse. All things considered, with Daichi and the assassination and everything else, it had been well over a month without any kind of _relief_. Sleeping next to _Nagisa_ , of all people, pressed so close… He deserved a medal for keeping it together most of the time.

“Just some exercises,” he explained pleasantly. “Pelvic floor or something, it’s meant to tighten the muscles.”

At the mention of _tight_ , Karma’s throat went bone dry, and his hands clenched into fists. The fact that Nagisa didn’t even know he was doing it made the torture all the more worse. Not when all Karma wanted to do was grab his ass and _squeeze_ , or slam him back and against the wall by his shoulders, watch that face of his contort…

Perhaps Karma needed to rethink his intentions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this took so long, honestly. I was pretty busy this week, but mainly I hate starting new arcs and I just know how juicy the next couple of chapters are, like I wanna write THOSE ones already :') 
> 
> Spelling of names we care about: 愛野 凛 Aino Rin   
> 東 ハイア Higashi Haia 
> 
> As always, comments keep me going!


	40. Check Up Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nagisa continues to adjust to school and Daichi turns two months

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *whistles innocently*

Two weeks into school, and things were going as well as they realistically could be. Nagisa still got the feeling they were just being eased in, and he’d soon be swamped with work. For the time being, though, he was trying to keep as on top of it as he could. Daichi was sleeping for a _lot_ longer at least, so he wasn’t as permanently tired as he’d been a month or so ago. That didn’t stop him from yawning, though, his brain slightly overworked.

It wasn’t that Nagisa was being intentionally anti-social, but spending his lunch break in the library just happened to the best option. That way, he could get as much homework out of the way as possible, so he didn’t have to even _try_ to find the time at home. Considering Daichi had developed a habit of acting like he was being tortured whenever somebody _wasn’t_ holding or otherwise engaging him, it was hard to get any work out of the way.

 _Such a diva_ , Nagisa thought to himself, though it was laced with twinges of sadness. He was developing his own personality already, but it was happening so _fast_. It was like he’d blinked, back in the hospital, and suddenly they were _here_. Nagisa couldn’t help but feel bad about it, like he hadn’t appreciated this stage enough. It wasn’t like aging was something you could go back and redo, either.

“Nagisa kun?”

He jolted, lost in thought and not expecting anybody to talk to him. “S-sorry,” he said, automatically. His eyes came to more of a focus, realising it was Rin, the upperclassman who had helped him out a couple of weeks ago. Since then, when he’d been escorted to the nurse’s, they’d only briefly acknowledged each other in person.

Smiling softly enough, he shrugged. “What are you doing out here?”

“Did you want to sit here?” Nagisa couldn’t help but ask. “I can move.”

Rin waved him off. “Man, they must’ve got stricter if you’re already doing homework during school hours. That only really started for me around midterms.”

Nagisa just knew he was going to hate midterms, with no massive bonus goal to work towards. He just had to think of it as his next target, set his eyes straight ahead. High school was something he had to get through. Though, he’d known what he was getting into, when he applied. Keisetsu was regarded as a tough school to even get _in_ to, for good reason.

“Say, you really shouldn’t hang around by yourself all the time,” Rin continued. “Are those guys still bullying you?”

He wasn’t sure how to respond to that. “ _No_ ,” he responded as quickly as he could, somewhat startled. “Oshiro kun hasn’t really spoken to me, and his friend isn’t even in the same class as us.”

Pulling out the chair beside him, Rin sat down. “I went to the same middle school as those two. Seems they’re still jerks.”

“It’s okay,” Nagisa said. “I can handle it.”

Of course, there was no way he could talk about his year of assassination training, how he’d faced up against professionals, far scarier than a couple of teenage boys. So he just had to hope that Rin would trust him, take his word for it. He couldn’t help but think of the third page of Korosensei’s book, a list of excuses about what they’d done the last year, for every situation.

“I was thinking…” He swallowed. “There’s a café just around the corner of campus, they do a really great latte, you know, I think she drew a cat in mine last time- Anyway! Do you maybe want to come with me, after school?”

All of a sudden, Nagisa felt his heart raise up, and then promptly drop again. It sounded fun, but… “Oh-“

“I mean!” Rin swiftly backed away a bit. “My friends will be there too and stuff, they’re really nice! They won’t mind you’re a first year, I mean.”

“It’s not that,” Nagisa said. “I’m just really busy today.”

Rin blinked for a moment. “Oh, I’m sorry.”

Immediately, Nagisa felt bad. He flashed Rin his best smile. “I would have really loved to come, Rin kun.”

“Eh, don’t worry about it. We go there quite a lot, so, another time?”

“Yeah,” Nagisa smiled. “I’d like that.”

It really _wasn’t_ that he didn’t want to hang out with his new friend. Maybe, even if it had been _another_ day, Nagisa would have considered staying out an hour longer or something. But the pit in his stomach reminded him that it wasn’t just another day. Officially, it meant Daichi was now two months old.

Though he supposed it wasn’t that big of a deal, they weren’t holding any kind of celebration or anything, it did mean Daichi was due a doctor’s visit. Nagisa was sure there wasn’t anything wrong with him, but it was better to know for certain. Plus, he needed a series of vaccinations, a thought that made Nagisa shudder, no matter how necessary he knew it was.

Regardless, he’d have to take a different train, and he was going to meet Karma outside the surgery. And he definitely didn’t want to be late to this. The whole age thing was bad enough as it was, but Nagisa didn’t want to further the bad impression by appearing completely irresponsible. So, he really couldn’t just hang around.

“Well,” Rin said, when the bell rang to signify lunch was over, “I’ll see you around.”

Bouts of nervousness set in, for the remainder of the day. He was _sure_ Daichi was fine, but now he’d started to think about it, could there be something really obvious he missed? Had he been checking on him enough? Nagisa tried his best to ignore it, but worry was seriously taking over. At least the final bell rang shortly enough, and he practically raced away from school grounds.

He was almost panting by the time he got to the train, and all the seats were full up, but at least he had time to catch his breath in between spots. Looking at his phone, he realised that he didn’t really have to rush. There was still plenty of time for walking allowance, and he knew that Karma probably wouldn’t be there yet. Not that he’d ever be _late_ , Nagisa just suspected he wouldn’t leave until he absolutely had to.

So, he kept his pace a lot lighter when the train pulled into the right stop, reaching the paediatrician’s with plenty of time to spare. Karma actually was already there, actually holding Daichi, with his other hand gripped around the pram. Even from a slight distance, Nagisa could make a guess that he hadn’t been particularly happy about being laid flat, with his vision obscured.

“He cried half the way here,” Karma complained.

Nagisa sighed, taking him out of Karma’s arms. “Only half?”

“Yeah,” he said, “until I just gave up and carried him.”

Given Karma’s track record and like to make people bend to his will in torture, Nagisa couldn’t help but be slightly amused that he was so easily manipulated, by a baby no less. It was pretty ironic, given Karma’s name. Nagisa didn’t mind so much, with no desire to discipline what he took as moderately inconvenient curiosity. At the end of the day, Nagisa supposed it was a good thing Karma had suggested they get the convertible pram, since they hadn’t gotten a particularly high amount of use out of its first setting.

Waiting inside for the appointment to actually begin wasn’t as bad as any of his pregnancy check ups had been, but Nagisa still felt an air of unease. A few confused eyes. Nagisa sat as still as he could, thankful that all the various shapes and colours seemed to be keeping Daichi distracted enough so that he didn’t fuss much. Though he was ‘sat up’ on Nagisa’s lap, leaning his weight against Nagisa’s chest, Nagisa noticed he was straining with his neck a little, like he was _trying_ to hold up his own head.

“Ah,” a receptionist finally came in. “Akabane?”

They shot each other a look, before standing up to follow them down a slight labyrinth of corridors, before finally reaching the right one. Nagisa hesitated for a moment, his earlier worry coming back to him. Before he could dwell on it for long, however, Karma leaned over him, easily opening the door himself.

The man on the other side didn’t seem that scary. He stood up and smiled. “Nice to meet you both,” he said, gesturing for them to enter his office. “Please, take a seat. This is Daichi chan, I take?”

Nagisa found himself nodding, feeling more at ease with every second that passed. Taking a small glance, Karma didn’t seem like he wanted to say anything. Though he’d appeared mildly annoyed a few minutes ago, Nagisa guessed that maybe he was just as nervous about this too. It was hard to tell what was going on in Karma’s head, sometimes.

“Well,” the doctor said. “I’m Shuzenji. I think it would be best to get the easier stuff out of the way first, whilst he’s still happy. Is he sleeping well?”

The proceeding questions weren’t so hard. Nagisa couldn’t help but flinch with every answer they gave, wondering if he was saying something bad. The doctor didn’t seem too bothered by anything they said, just nodding along with what Nagisa had to hope is approval.

“I’d say everything sounds good,” he finally came to his verdict. “But now I’ll examine his health.”

Despite being a medical professional, Nagisa still hated to hand Daichi over to who was essentially a stranger to them. But he knew he had to just get over it, for the sake of Daichi’s wellbeing. Doctor Shuzenji brought him up to the examination table, and Nagisa craned his neck to see what was going on. Thankfully, it only looked like weighing scales. That wasn’t so bad.

“Seven pounds eleven ounces,” he announced. “Still pretty small for his age, but that’s a good increase from his birth weight.”

A strain on Nagisa’s chest was lifted. If he was putting on weight, it surely had to mean that he was doing okay so far. He didn’t mind so much, then, about the other examinations. Daichi didn’t seem to care that much either, as he was poked and prodded. Nagisa hoped he hadn’t found anything, considering there had been no stopping in the examination to point anything out.

Doctor Shuzenji turned around and smiled. “He’s doing just fine. As I said, he’s small, one of the smallest I’ve seen for this age, but as long as he continues to develop and put on weight, you shouldn’t have anything to worry about.“ It turned into a grimace. “Now for the harder part.”

He launched into what Nagisa assumed was the general speech about vaccinations he gave. Nagisa honestly wished he’d brought his notebook in with him, there was a lot to remember and some of the scientific things were going over his head. Looking at his side, Karma’s face was taunt in concentration, so Nagisa felt like he could relax just a little. His stomach did turn at warnings of potential fever and upset, though.

“It often helps,” he said, “if one parent comes up with me. All you have to do is hold him still, it’s far more comforting for them to see a familiar face.”

“You do it,” Karma said, eyes bearing into Nagisa.

Nagisa really, _really_ didn’t want to. But he absolutely understood why Karma didn’t want a part in it. For his own experience, injections weren’t exactly _pleasant_ , and the needle would be a lot larger compared to Daichi’s tiny body. He’d have to just get through it, though. He just hoped Daichi wouldn’t _hate_ him for it.

He sat as he was instructed, with Daichi on his lap. Doctor Shuzenji decided to start with the biggest combination one, getting the needle ready. Nagisa could hardly bear to look at the thing, holding Daichi perhaps a little bit too tightly. He took a hold of Daichi’s leg, and Nagisa cringed. Daichi didn’t just start crying, he _screamed_ piercingly, and Nagisa felt like the worst person alive.

“It’s okay,” the doctor reassured soothingly, quickly reaching for whatever the oral vaccine was. Nagisa saw through his method, realising that Daichi would be too distracted to think about spitting out the foreign substance. “Last one now.”

Once again, an injection to the leg. Impossibly, Daichi’s shrieks only grew louder, as he attempted to thrash out of the way. Nagisa felt sick to his core, like he was holding his son down for torture. In reality, it didn’t even last that long before the doctor pulled away again, sighing sadly.

“It’s over now. We’ll keep you for the next ten minutes, just to make sure there’s no bad reactions to anything, but after that you’re good to go. I’d recommend getting some infant medicine from any local drug stores, just in case he does get a bit of a temperature. ”

Nagisa attempted his best comfort, but it didn’t help that much. Holding Daichi much closer in more of a cuddle didn’t seem to do anything other than soak the material covering his shoulder with tears. Panicked, his eyes found Karma’s, who didn’t look much better. His face was white as a _sheet_. Wracking his brain for anything to make it better, Nagisa did know a few calming techniques, but he had no idea if it would work on a _baby_.

Pulling Daichi back slightly so he could see what he was doing, Nagisa searched for a specific pressure spot, on the neck just beneath the chin. The only choice he really had, he lightly pressed there, as quickly as he could safely jab. Miraculously, the shrieking stopped, cries becoming silent, sniffling sobs. Daichi looked up at him, and the sheer amount of _hurt_ in his eyes broke Nagisa’s heart.

All he had the power to do was to wait it out. And Nagisa hated every moment of it. Worse still, they’d have to come back in a month for the next round, and then again the month after that. Putting him through this _again_ , it made Nagisa feel evil. He knew letting him get sick with something really dangerous was far worse, though. At least he wouldn’t remember this.

There was no use trying to put him down when they were allowed to leave. Thankfully it seemed Daichi wasn’t about to start holding grudges, and continued to somewhat cling to Nagisa. He wasn’t producing much noise at all by the time they got outside, but Nagisa could tell he was still upset. A little worn out, maybe.

“We should go shopping,” Nagisa said, trying to distract himself from the sombre mood.

Karma didn’t say anything, though Nagisa could see there was a clench to his jaw. It was no use trying to get to the route of the problem when Karma was like that. At least, probing him until he got an answer. Nagisa pulled himself together, trying to think of the best way to ‘reboot’ Karma so at least his presence was bearable.

Nagisa thought for a moment. “How was school? Did they give you any more quizzes?”

It wasn’t the most _interesting_ of conversations by a longshot, and Karma seemed slightly taken aback, but the more they walked, he lightened up a little. Hearing about Kunugigaoka was weird, having viewed it recently as a piece of his past. Karma continued to complain about mock exams and how he was having to knuckle down to stay ahead, all the way until they were half done with the shopping. High school was bound to be a lot tougher than middle school, though, so Nagisa was glad he wasn’t slacking.

He’d carried Daichi the whole way round the shop, so he was thankful when he noticed him dropping off. As a consequence of sleeping longer during the nights, he was far more awake at day, but Nagisa supposed the toll of the vaccines on his body was tiring him out. Hoping it wouldn’t disturb him too much, Nagisa took advantage of the opportunity to put him in the pram, praying he’d sleep it off the rest of the way home.

By the time they got in, Karma was still deep in thought, Nagisa was still mellow, and Daichi was still asleep. At least they had a bunch of nappies (such a small child could go through an insane amount), plus a soda that Karma had _apparently_ thrown in. Instantly, Nagisa registered the smell of food. It wasn’t that his mother’s cooking was necessarily bad usually, he just hadn’t been expecting such strong flavours. Something was up.

“Ah, Nagisa!” She called. “Akabane kun. Welcome back.”

Slipping his shoes off, Nagisa craned his neck. “Mum? What’s-“

“Welcome!” His father popped his head around. “Your mother suggested we eat dinner together tonight.”

“Really?” Nagisa couldn’t hold in. It seemed a little too good to be true. Something he hadn’t had in so long…

His mother was in the kitchen, standing over the stove with some pans. “It’s pork cutlet tonight.”

She looked… Happy? His father looked _happy_. Nagisa wondered if he’d fallen into some kind of alternate reality. Maybe something has sneakily replaced his parents because this wasn’t _normal_. Like he was eight years old again, Nagisa stepped forwards, into the more communal area of the apartment.

He turned back around, trying to communicate his fear and confusion. Karma wasn’t giving him too much back. Swallowing, Nagisa supposed he shouldn’t expect the most. At least when it came to his mother, Nagisa appreciated that Karma reigned in most of his biting comments. He assumed it was to avoid setting her off over her unpredictable edge, though Nagisa had never actually _told_ him about it.  

“We’re going to leave Daichi in the pram,” Nagisa said, in an attempt to make the atmosphere less awkward. “I don’t want to wake him up.”

His mother really _was_ in a good mood, because she smiled. “How did it go?”

Nagisa chewed the inside of his cheek. “He’s healthy and everything, but he didn’t like the injections.”

“Torture,” Karma finally said. Bitingly.  

Nagisa’s father laughed. “A lot of things feel like that, even when you know it’s for the best. I probably have a few stories of Nagisa when he was young.”

Something in Karma’s demeanour shifted. “Oh _really_?”

Like a switch had flipped and suddenly Karma was expelling a level of natural charm, he sat down at the dinner table. Nagisa followed him, scared for what this conversation was going to lead to. His father sat opposite them, clearly at ease. There was a terrifying glint and focus in Karma’s eyes.

“No…”Nagisa tried to warn, but nobody paid him attention.

“I remember one time,” his father continued, “I think Nagisa couldn’t have been older than five? Anyway, I took him out for sushi, and he’d never seen conveyor belt style before. He could barely contain himself.”

“Dad,” Nagisa complained, burying his head in his hands.

“Aw,” Karma said, “how cute.” The edges to his tone were like knives. He was definitely going to be hearing about this later.

“Oh!” His father clapped. “It gets better! You see, he thought it was magnificent, but he couldn’t figure out for the life of him that the circuit continued into the kitchen. I don’t know, I think he must have assumed that all the food was going to be wasted or something, because he just started grabbing at _every plate_ that came past. I wasn’t paying much attention, and the owners actually asked us to leave, because nobody else was getting any food.”

With an almost howl, Karma burst out laughing. Not just his teasing, intentional laugh, but something pure that took over his whole body. His composure just went, and Nagisa couldn’t sense even the slightest bit of bad intent, though he was sure Karma would bring it up again later. His breaths came rapid, face contorting in a kind of ugly way, yet Nagisa had never seen him look so attractive.

“What did he do next?” Karma wheezed.

His father beamed. “Started crying of course. I practically had to drag him out of there, whilst he complained about wastage. I had to explain it all to him, then. You still like sushi though, right, Nagisa?”

Nagisa looked down at the table. “ _Dad_ …”

“What’s this?” His mother came in then, with the bowls. “Embarrassing stories of Nagisa? I have a few.”

“This isn’t _fair_!” Nagisa stated, probably unable to handle much more. “Thanks for the food.”

“Oh,” Karma jolted, like he just remembered. “Yeah, thanks.”

Figuring Karma wasn’t really used to ‘family meals’, Nagisa supposed he would forget something like that from time to time. Now he’d relaxed, he at least appeared to be having a good time. He was handling Nagisa’s parents, like a pro. His smile didn’t falter, though, no matter how closely Nagisa observed him. It was almost like he fitted in or something.

Nagisa stood up, once he was done eating. “That was great, Mum. Karma and I will wash the dishes for you.”

Shooting him a look, before rolling his eyes, Karma stood up too and nodded, making to pick up a few bowls. Diligently, he followed Karma into the kitchen, but all bets were off the moment he was close enough to the sink. Though he took care not to break anything, he moved fast, finding the perfect opening to splash Nagisa in the face with water.

“That’s for pimping me out,” Karma drawled, but he didn’t seem too serious.

He couldn’t hold back his laugh. “Stop it!” 

Karma threw him the rubber gloves. “You can wash it.”

“What are _you_ going to do?” Nagisa narrowed his eyes. “ _Supervise_?”

“I mean, I _was_ going to dry, but that’s a much better idea.”

He dried anyway. It felt oddly calming after such a long and dramatic day. Really, Karma didn’t seem like he minded that much, other than the slightest annoyance at ‘unnecessary’ exertion. They were done, with everything put away as neatly as possible, before too long and without an issue. After all of that, Nagisa actually felt pretty tired.

When they came back, he could tell that Daichi was stirring, Figuring he’d he _slightly_ happier to fully wake up in Nagisa’s arms, Nagisa sighed and picked him up. There didn’t seem to be a significant shift in his temperature from what it normally was, but Nagisa was still going to keep a close eye on it. Daichi squirmed a little, but was still groggy.

“I’m just going to take him to my room,” Nagisa explained. “In case he gets really unsettled again.”

“Goodnight,” his father called.

Nagisa entered his room, Karma right behind him, but couldn’t wipe the smile off his face. It seemed like everything he’d ever wanted. His parents, at least, they looked really happy. He just hoped they’d keep it up, without going back to how they used to fight when he was really young. Things couldn’t have gone better, really.

“Oh,” Nagisa let out. Karma looked at him, as if to ask what it was. “I forgot to finish my homework.”

“Tut tut,” Karma joked, reaching out for Daichi. “You don’t want to fall behind.”

He still felt guilty about it, as he fetched his school bag and sat at his desk, despite knowing that Daichi was in more than good hands. Nagisa tried his best to finish off what he’d been working on, before Rin had started talking to him. He’d almost finished, before a rattling kind of noise caught his attention. Distracted, Nagisa turned and looked over his shoulder.

Karma, who had apparently finished the soda he bought earlier, was shaking around the empty bottle, causing the marble to fly around, rapidly hitting the glass. He had Daichi semi propped up with some creative pillow arrangement, so he wasn’t completely flat. At the very least, Daichi looked entertained by the stimulation, smiling and moving his limbs excitedly. It was a stark difference to how he’d been earlier. Though he was clearly trying to keep the noise down, Karma beamed right back, laughing lightly at their son’s enthusiasm.

Nagisa knew that Karma could qualify as ‘baby whisperer’ on occasion, but he wasn’t jealous or anything. On the contrast, he couldn’t help but stare. He’d never seen Karma so openly happy and _loving_ about anything. Mostly, because he didn’t really broadcast his emotions much. Sure, Nagisa could easily tell when Karma was angry or frustrated or anything like that, but he kept his positive feelings largely to himself.

It was a privilege, almost, to see Karma’s most natural and pure of smiles. The smile Nagisa had grown to love.

Something uncomfortable clenched his chest, at that fleeting thought, and he almost doubled over in a wave of sickness. It had been just a fleeting thought, but… His fingers trembled, struggling to keep their grip on his pen. The world came crashing down right around him. Everything, every little _thing_ , suddenly made complete, horrific sense. All the times he’d found himself staring for too long, their touches, the way some of Karma’s words lit him ablaze… There was a huge, (disgustingly obvious, now he thought about it) all comprehensive reason behind it _all._

At some point, without realising it was happening, he’d fallen in love with Karma.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fucking finally, am I right? 
> 
> Took him over 150,000 words, but here we are. 
> 
> If you guys don't know, ramune is a type of Japanese soda. Rather than a lid, it has a marble thing you have to push down into the bottle - it's impossible to get back out again though, so once you're done drinking it makes a rattly kind of noise when you shake it. Just google search it if it sounds really weird - it tastes great, though I kind of think it's like, PURE sugar
> 
> Sorry this took a little longer than usual, I marathon watched all of Boku No Hero Academia :') (Maybe one day I''ll write a crossover- I already decided what Karma's quirk would be) 
> 
> Once again, all comments and such are my biggest motivator!


	41. Confession Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Having realised his feelings, Nagisa tries to figure out how to tell Karma

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As you'll have noticed, rating change. Fair warning, this chapter has a scene of sexual nature involving a minor. If that really makes you uncomfortable, go ahead and skip it. I think where it starts and ends is pretty obvious, as is what happens, so I won't summarise it or anything :) Enjoy, and read at your own discretion.

Admitting his feelings to himself had caused a _few_ things to happen. For one, now he was aware of them, it was like they’d _multiplied_. Nagisa had fallen for Karma slowly, slow enough he hadn’t noticed it happening, but now it was as if he’d tripped over and face planted the floor. That was a pretty good analogy, because this development was hurting his head.

Nagisa seemed hyperaware of every little movement Karma made. Every time Karma so much as caught his gaze, Nagisa had to avert his eyes, trying to hide the blush that so quickly rushed upon his face. Whenever Karma said _anything_ , Nagisa practically jolted out of his skin. And then there was his _scent._ Having lived amongst it for so long, it didn’t have a dramatic, heart stopping effect on him. Perhaps that would have been better, somehow. The thing was, his scent was so ingrained into Nagis’s life now that he associated it with home. It wasn’t as if he constantly walked around smelling like Karma or anything, but it was definitely a presence he’d gotten used to and would feel _wrong_ without.

Falling asleep next to him was absolute torture. It wasn’t like he could suddenly start insisting they sleep separately, after so long. Karma would quickly start to suspect something, which was something Nagisa definitely couldn’t deal with. He kept his distance as best he could, jerking away every time they brushed legs. How had he existed like this every night before? It didn’t help that Karma tended to sleep like an octopus, wrapping his limbs around Nagisa’s body in the oddest of ways. Of course, Nagisa’s bed was pretty small. He wondered if Karma knew he was doing it.

He couldn’t sleep. Nagisa knew sleep was probably the best thing to do, rest on his emotions and see if this was just a fluke. It could just be a result of the stressful day, easily. Deep down, he knew that wasn’t true. At least Karma was out of it soon enough, and wouldn’t notice Nagisa’s internal breakdown. This was going to become a real big issue soon enough, because with every passing second, Nagisa wanted to burst it out. Even Karma’s soft, sleep filled breathing almost set it off.

There was no way he could live like this. It was all Nagisa could do to not poke him awake and just tell him, right then and there. Fear held him back. This, _love_ , was unchartered territory. The worst part was that Nagisa didn’t even know what he wanted. Even if he did know his feelings, he didn’t know the next step, even if there _was_ one.

When Daichi inevitably woke up, Nagisa was almost over the moon. At least it was something to do, rather than try his best to avoid staring at sleeping Karma at all costs. He’d been expecting him to be a little more unwell, or at least fussy over the vaccinations. Honestly, he didn’t seem that bothered by any of it now he’d long since gotten over the crying spell. Nagisa hoped he’d stay that way, tough as nails.

After he’d fed him, and decided to change him (mainly to put off going back to bed), Nagisa felt a little bit better. At least when he laid down, holding Daichi as tightly as he could without worrying about suffocating him, his mind was taken off things, eventually allowing the exhaustion to win out. It wasn’t a very deep sleep, though, more like he blinked and suddenly it was morning.

He hated the feeling of waking up hollow. Like the night before had just been paused for a little bit and everything else was still the same. Nagisa closed his eyes immediately after blinking them open, as if that would help him escape from the reality of everything. It didn’t work for long. Though his eyes were closed, the rest of his senses were awake. Nagisa knew something wasn’t quite right.

Letting his eyes fall open again, he instantly noticed the phone, aimed in his direction. He yelped, immediately sitting up as his brain caught up. Karma didn’t seem too bothered about saying anything to him, his attention more on the phone. It took Nagisa a few seconds to realise that Karma had clearly been taking photos of him or something, and was probably backing it up online so it could never be deleted. 

“What are you doing?!” Nagisa tried to grab his phone. 

Karma happened to have much longer arms, simply holding the device over his head. “Maybe it’s a secret,” he teased.

Frustration overtaking him, Nagisa planned his next attempt. His eyes narrowed, taking in his surroundings. “Where’s Daichi?”

“Huh?” Karma looked a little thrown off, before relaxing again. “Well, he woke up a while ago, but you slept right through it, and he went right back down after that, so,” he looked over his shoulder at the crib, gesturing. “You were thrashing around like crazy, anyway.” His demeanour shifted, and Nagisa knew any seriousness was over. “Dreaming about something nice?”

Nagisa almost jumped out of his skin. “N-no…” He had to pray he hadn’t done something _embarrassing_.

His prayers weren’t being answered by the universe, apparently, because then Karma tapped the screen, and a weird sound came out of it, a delicate kind of rumbling. It was only when Nagisa caught the actual footage playing that he understood. Karma hadn’t been taking a picture of him, he’d been video tapping him, purring in his sleep.

“Then what’s _this_?” Karma’s eyes glinted.

Honestly, there were a lot of omega stereotypes that Nagisa wasn’t entirely sure the level of truth of. He’d heard thing, but he hadn’t exactly come across it in his own life. Purring was a sign of contentment, an instinctual reaction and appreciation for being safe and cared for. Naturally, over the years, it had become a sexual connotation, so Karma having footage of it… _embarrassing_.  

Of course Nagisa bolted, going up on his knees to balance out the height difference. So Karma wouldn’t be able to just do the same, he swung his leg over his thighs, trapping him in place. No way was Karma allowed to keep a video of him doing _that_. Karma didn’t just give up and hand it over to him, though. He leant back, as if daring Nagisa to follow. For some reason, Nagisa took the bait, shifting his balance in a desperate grasp.

Karma took the perfect opportunity to flip him onto his back. The movement was smooth, calculated, and suddenly Nagisa was springing against the mattress. Following the same momentum, Karma braced himself above him with one hand, grabbing both of Nagisa’s wrists and pinning them above his head with the other.

“You’re not having it, _Nagisa_ ,” he drawled.  

Throat suddenly very dry, Nagisa automatically did his best to swallow what little saliva there was. Still a little thick from sleep, Karma’s voice was kind of gravelly and deep, even with his teasing layered over the top. His whole body gave a kind of shiver, stunned as it took in what was happening. Karma was on top of him, in between his legs due to their previous position, _pinning_ him in place, looming over him.

Nagisa let out a light whimper, beginning to sweat. Something uncomfortable churned in his stomach, and then he jolted. Between his legs, he felt a slight, sickening, trickling sensation. Naturally, it was enough to snap Nagisa out of his daze, and into panic mode. Having no idea what it was, he automatically assumed the worst, that it was _blood_ and the flip over had been too rough.

“I really need the bathroom!” Nagisa tried, squirming. Surprisingly, Karma let him go right away. Perhaps out of fear that Nagisa would accidently pee on him or something, or just because he valued the footage more, but he didn’t protest, allowing Nagisa could dash out of the room.

As soon as he was in privacy, Nagisa didn’t hesitate over checking. Awkward as it was, he shoved a hand back there, indeed contacting a large amount of dampness between his ass cheeks. Cringing as he did so, he pulled his fingers back to inspect them. They weren’t red with blood, so at least he could relax a little, but then Nagisa realised what it was, and stumbled back, landing ungracefully on the toilet.

That was _slick_. As in, the natural lubrication omegas produced during sexual arousal. Nagisa had never experienced the sensation before, so of course he hadn’t noticed it _happening._ Cheeks entirely pink, Nagisa wanted to hang his head in shame. Not only were his feelings messing with his head, they were messing with his body. At least his panicked pheromones had probably overtaken his aroused ones. Karma hadn’t seemed to notice it.

This would be so much easier if it was pure lust. Anybody with _eyes_ could see Karma was attractive, and Nagisa supposed he carried that kind of dangerous, rough, charming aura that people tended to go for. If it was just that, Nagisa could get over it. He could just jerk off in the shower or something, and then be good for the rest of the day. Nagisa knew it wasn’t like that.

Speaking of showers, that seemed like the best course of action. Mostly because the sensation was kind of gross, and he wanted to wash it away immediately, but also for the scent it was producing. If Karma hadn’t noticed before, he’d _definitely_ notice if Nagisa returned in that state. A sick part of him felt a tingle of excitement at that prospect.

Stripping off his clothes and turning the spray on, the warmth of it shocked his sensitive skin. It just wouldn’t stop playing on his mind. Nagisa was a truly awful person, for getting turned on from that. He felt weird that it had just been the slick, though, rather than getting hard. He figured maybe one came before the other or something. The more he thought about the situation, the more his lower stomach twisted, and he’d answered his own question.

Although this was more familiar territory, it was almost worse. The slick Nagisa could excuse as something he didn’t understand, but this… Nagisa squeezed his eyes shut, trying to think about anything other than Karma. Unfortunately, the harder he tried, the more the thoughts raced in. He bit his lip, imagining what would have happened if he hadn’t freaked out.

That was a ship long sailed, though. Better yet, what if Karma decided he wasn’t done teasing him. ‘ _What’s taking so long’_ , he’d burst in, and find Nagisa like that. Giving up, because his problem wasn’t going to go away, he wrapped a hand around himself and begun to tug erratically. His head slammed back against the wall as he pictured Karma doing the same to him, naked now and backing Nagisa up into a corner.

He could almost _feel_ it, Karma’s hot breath ghosting against his ear, rough hands tracing the lines of his body. Of course Nagisa would be paralysed there, a slave to his touch. Subconsciously, he tilted his neck, leaning into phantom kisses and licks around his unmarked scent glands. ‘ _Stop…_ ’ Nagisa would say, ‘ _don’t_ …’ and when it became too much, then, ‘ _don’t stop_ ’.

In reality, he did his best to keep quiet, though he started panting with exertion. His pace just got quicker, as his fantasy Karma’s hands travelled lower. He imagined Karma’s hand replacing his, taking over completely. And Nagisa would be happy at first, but then the pace would slow to almost _nothing_ , just to torment him. He wouldn’t be able to do much about it, other than accepting it, or else beg. ‘ _Please… More_ ’.

And maybe Karma would deny him at first, tracing over his length with just a single finger, making him shudder. Until he got bored, at least. And _then_ , Nagisa would cry out, as Karma roughly spun him around, shoving his face up against the tiles. He wouldn’t be able to see, but he’d be able to _feel_ Karma’s gaze on him. And perhaps Nagisa would wobble a little, and he’d have to rebalance, accidentally sticking his ass out a little. Karma, ever resourceful, would take his chance, grabbing at it roughly, spreading his cheeks apart…

Nagisa’s face screwed up as he eventually snapped and came, the tension leaving his body. It was kind of a relief; it had been so _long_ with everything had happened, before the whole omega thing came out at least. Unfortunately, after a few moments of peace and happy endorphins, the conflict crept right back in, even worse. Perhaps getting himself off to thoughts of Karma touching him in the shower wasn’t an effective way to deal with his confusing emotions. He wondered if he’d even be able to look Karma in the _eye_.

Once he’d actually washed himself off, Karma seemed casual as ever. Apparently Nagisa had been in the shower long enough that Daichi was up again, ready to face the day it seemed. As he’d suspected, Nagisa couldn’t help but avoid eye contact with Karma. Daichi was incredibly sluggish, he noticed. He suspected it was just a delayed reaction to those vaccines, which he supposed was probably a good thing.

Frankly, Nagisa couldn’t live like this. He couldn’t live so close to Karma, when all he wanted to do was scream about his love from the rooftops. Clearly, it wasn’t just emotions he could dig and bury. This was going to come out eventually, so better right then than later, in case something incredibly embarrassing happened. Knowing Nagisa’s luck, he’d blurt it out in his sleep or something.

“Karma,” he suggested, “do you want to go for a walk?”

 _Wow_ , Nagisa thought to himself, _way to make that sound anything but casual_. He couldn’t have this conversation here, though, not in such a cramped space with his mother right around the corner. Confusion crossed Karma’s expression, and honestly Nagisa couldn’t blame him. He was acting insane.

Eventually, Karma shrugged. “Did I miss something today?”

“No!” Nagisa denied very quickly, attempting to think of an excuse. “Uhm, you wanted to take Daichi to see the cherry blossoms, right, a while ago? I-it’s probably the last weekend there’s going to be any, so I thought we could go to the park or something. E-especially when he’s all sleepy like this.”  

“You know that was just a decoy excuse,” his eyes narrowed, but he let it go. “Sure, why not?”

Well, that was progress. Daichi was too out of it to really protest much to anything, getting dressed in ‘outdoor’ clothes, or even being laid flat in the pram. The moment they were out of the door, Nagisa’s brain almost short circuited. So far, this plan was going well, they’d left the apartment and this was the perfect time to have a conversation. Walking down the street, Daichi dropped off at the motion, and it was now or never.

But then Nagisa hesitated, the words at the tip of his tongue not really forming. What did he even want to come from this? Sure, he knew he really needed to get his emotions out in the open, but there had to be a next step. In the back of his head, he imagined Karma saying he liked him back, but even then… Did he want a _relationship_?

Nagisa suspected they were far beyond the point of dating. But none of this was a normal situation. Wouldn’t it make it awkward, if they both had feelings? He didn’t really know all that much about love, but he imagined that if Karma liked him too, those feelings would _increase_. And even if they did end up together, there was always the chance that it wouldn’t even work. They were okay having Daichi and being friends, but actual break ups could get _messy_. From first-hand experience, Nagisa couldn’t live with himself if he put Daichi through that.

He swallowed, remembering there was no chance Karma liked him back. Why would he? Way back at the start of their year in 3E, Nagisa had overheard the girls declaring Karma the most attractive (on looks alone, they’d emphasised), _unanimously_. Realistically, he knew Karma could date anybody he wanted to, if he tried. Basically, he could get better than _him_. The situation they were in was incredibly complicated, but there was no way Karma would spend so much time with him, if not for Daichi. They were tied down to each other.

But Nagisa knew keeping it to himself would probably be worse than all that. Best case scenario, Karma would just accept it, and they could both mutually ignore it and move on with their lives. Sure, it would be painful, but it would be for the best. At the very least, Nagisa knew Karma wouldn’t freak out and run away from him. Nagisa trusted that he loved Daichi far too much for that.

When they actually got to the park, Nagisa considered, after not getting any of that out verbally, that maybe words weren’t the best way to express himself. They were walking at a leisurely pace, Karma pushing the pram, as a light breeze tore flowers from the trees. A petal landed on Karma’s head, and Nagisa _considered_ it. He considered leaning in under the guise of removing it, standing up on his tip toes but connecting their lips instead. That way, he’d _know_ , if Karma kissed him back.

His heart thumped inside his chest, when he realised he was going to just go for it. For better or worse, Nagisa would be presenting himself loud and clear. Steeling himself, he let his hand drift on to the handle, covering Karma’s. Predictably, he looked at Nagisa in question, and he knew it was time. He leaned forwards, onto the balls of his feet, before distinct crying sounded out.

Karma looked down into the pram, and laughed lightly. “Aw, he doesn’t know what it is.”

On inspection, it seemed a blossom had drifted its way inside, and was covering Daichi’s face. It was pretty cute to look at, but Nagisa still hated it when he was upset. He sighed, his confession plan going way out of the window, and picked Daichi up. Once in Nagisa’s arms, he did calm down, far more interested in the sudden change in surrounding.

After bouncing him a little bit, Daichi almost looked like he would instantly drop off again. That didn’t stop him from batting his limbs at the sight of the blossoms in the air, though, in a kind of attempt to grab at them. Nagisa suspected he’d like it a lot, when he was old enough to actually appreciate it, a thought which made him smile. The non-subtle sound of Karma’s phone camera brought him out

“Really?” Nagisa asked, only slightly annoyed. He couldn’t help but feel slightly on edge.

“I guess I just like taking pictures…“ He explained. “You know, of things I want to remember.”

Nagisa’s breath hitched. “O-oh, sorry.”

He didn’t seem particularly torn up over it, though. He moved around, leaning in closer to Nagisa, and flicked the display of the camera around. The least Nagisa could do was indulge Karma’s selfies, he supposed. He smiled, trying to hold Daichi up as best he could, and let Karma take a few. The session was over, though, when Daichi squirmed and rubbed one of his eyes.  

Karma looked over his shoulder. “Want to go to that café over there?”

That sounded like a great idea. Perhaps if Nagisa had food to occupy himself with, something to do with his hands, it would be easier to get his words out. The downside was that it was a more formal situation for a conversation, but it was the best option he had. By the looks of things, Daichi was going to go right back to sleep again anyway, so staying still for a period of time would end up being pretty convenient.

In the time it took them to sit down, order, and start on their food, Nagisa tried to psych himself up. His eyes darted around, verifying that they weren’t close enough to other people that it didn’t feel like a private conversation. The seating was pretty spaced out, anyway, enough for them to fit the pram next to them without disturbing anybody. Daichi had gone back to sleep, at least.                 

“What is it, Nagisa?”

Nagisa gulped, not allowing himself to meet Karma’s eyes from across the table. He didn’t know what he was so worried about, it was just _words_. Sure, they were _important_ words, but… He knew that Karma wouldn’t run off and leave him, even if he did reject Nagisa’s feelings. Or, at least, he prayed that. 

But what would change, for the better? It was hard to imagine himself in a _real_ relationship with Karma. Perhaps Nagisa should stall, call this entire thing off until he figured out what he really wanted. But he was combusting, from the inside out. The most likely result of his confession would be quick acknowledgment, and then they’d just ignore it. At least, that would be better, than keeping it to himself.

Karma leaned closer in the plastic chair. “Okay, fess it up.” He reached forwards, pulling Nagisa’s food away from him. “You clearly have something to tell me.”

 _Yes_ , Nagisa thought, _I love you_. It didn’t even have to be a longwinded confession, just those words. I love you. IloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouI-

“ _Nagisa_ ,” Karma started waving his hand in front of his face. “Are you about to tell me you’re dying of some rare disease, or something?”

 _Only potential heartbreak_ , Nagisa wanted to respond. His heart was actually hurting, though, with how hard it was beating against his chest. He wanted to bang his head against the wall, knowing he was just being a coward. But he just couldn’t force the words up and out of his throat. It was the way Karma was looking at him, studiously, clearly trying to work out for himself what was wrong. Nagisa couldn’t help but feel very tiny, under his unrelenting gaze.

“K-karma, I-“ Yeah, that was good. One word down, a couple more to go. “I-“ Nagisa just didn’t understand how this was so _painful_. He turned his head in the opposite direction, feeling his face flush up. “I just wanted t-to say that, uhm.” His throat caught up, completely dry.

Karma leant back again, letting his chair hit the ground with a thud. “Jeez, you sound like you’re about to confess to killing a man, or something.” He perked up. “You didn’t do that, right?”

Forcing himself to look Karma in the eye again, Nagisa clenched both his fists. “ _No._ ”

“Then _what_?”

Nagisa nodded, mostly for his own purposes. “Recently,” he begun, “I’ve… noticed some feelings. And so, uhm, Karma, I just felt like I should tell you.”

Karma cocked his head. “Okay…”

This had been a bad idea. “I realised that what I really want is-“ Right there and then, Nagisa’s nerve _vanished_. “To join a club!”

“ _Huh_?” Karma questioned, confused.

It was too late to take it back. “Yeah, uhm, everyone has started to join at least one. B-but, I just didn’t want to say anything, because it would mean that you’d have to take Daichi alone regularly, and-“

“It’s hardly a problem,” Karma shrugged. “What, you thought I’d be mad or something?”

“Something like that,” Nagisa dropped eye contact again.

He was an idiot. There was no way this would have worked out. Fear won out, and Nagisa knew what he had to do. Burry it, repress it, find a way to live with it… Perhaps even get over it entirely. He couldn’t stand it, but all things considered, it was for the best. Who was he kidding, anyway? What he had with Karma, their friendship, it was _good_. It made Nagisa _happy_. It was something he didn’t want to ruin.

It was clear. Karma could _never_ find out about Nagisa’s true feelings.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact, none of that smut even happened in my original plan. I just... I got carried away idk the words just came out of me or something :') 
> 
> *hides from all your anger* 
> 
> What, you thought I'd let them just... be happy? Like that? Me? No they must suffer first.


	42. Confession Time - Second Period

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nagisa tries to cope with his feelings, and find a way to spend the week long break from school

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alternative chapter title: 'for fucks sake, nagisa'

Most people his age would be overjoyed at a week long break from school. Even the nerdier kids, who took school super seriously seemed happy about it. It made sense, midterms were coming up and it was a free week to study. In Nagisa’s case, golden week was a nightmare. It wasn’t that he usually hated it or anything, but this one year, Nagisa didn’t  _want_  the time off. The more he could avoid Karma, the better.

It wasn’t the best tactic in the world, but it was the only way he’d found to cope with it. Being in Karma’s presence for too long just messed with his head even more. Even when Karma had simply reached across him for something, Nagisa’s hands had gotten all clammy, and he’d found himself leaning towards him, like he was desperate for their skin to touch. It was pathetic.

But he had to get over it.  _Had_  to. Nagisa knew he could, eventually. What was the likelihood he was destined to love only one person, for his entire existence? He couldn’t help but think about someone like Maehara, who had  _definitely_  dated more than one girl. Then again, Nagisa highly doubted he’d been in love with all of them. It would be a lot easier, if Karma wasn’t so…  _Karma_.

“Yo, Nagisa kun, are you paying attention?” Nishi Hansuke waved a hand in front of his eyes.

Blinking slowly, Nagisa tried to ignore his thoughts. “Y-yeah, sorry,” he turned to look at the boy who sat at his left. “It was a late night.”

He shrugged, and leaned back in his own seat. “That essay nearly killed me too. ‘Find three different sources’, like, most of it’s useless.”

Nagisa didn’t have the heart to tell him he’d already done the civics essay. Really, it was Daichi causing havoc to his sleep schedule. He’d celebrated too soon, about him progressively sleeping for longer periods. For the last week or so, it was right back to square one, and waking up every two or three hours. Mostly, he’d just turned out to be extra hungry, so it didn’t freak him out  _too_  much (correction: it had freaked him out  _quite a bit_  for a couple of days until he just looked it up). He didn’t mind so much, if it meant he was actually growing. It was getting a little ridiculous that he still fit into newborn clothes, despite being slowly approaching three months.

“I’m finding it pretty tough,” Nagisa smiled.  

“And it has to be handed in  _tomorrow_ ,” he continued to complain.

In front of them, Kita turned over her shoulder. “Perhaps you’d have done it by now if you actually paid attention in class.”

Nishi leaned forward, halfway across the desk. “You can’t have been paying much attention either, if you’re turning around to look at me so much.”

“As if,” she muttered, turning back around with the flick of her hair. Considering he sat directly behind her, Nagisa knew she wasn’t turning around to sneak glances, but he did notice the slight flush on her face.

“ _Anyway_ ,” Nishi continued, looking at Nagisa. “My birthday’s coming up next week. I thought I’d invite the whole class to my party, since we’re still getting to know each other.”

 The boy who sat behind them, Minami Sora snorted. “And here I was feeling  _special_.”

Nishi grinned. “There’s gonna be cake, you know. Don’t complain. So,” he met eyes with Nagisa, “are you coming?”

It sounded like a lot of fun, to be honest. Nagisa felt like he was on the verge of being friends with a few of his classmates, but there was only so much you could bond during school hours. So, he almost instinctively said yes, before a sour taste on the tip of his tongue stopped him. Of course, he couldn’t just go to a party whenever he felt like anymore. It felt wrong to do that, anyway.  

“I usually go out of the country with my family that week,” Nagisa lied, feeling completely awful about it. “I really wish I could, though.”

Not seeming too bothered, Nishi waved him off. “Don’t worry about it.”

“I can edit you into the photos, Nagisa kun!” Higashi announced cheerfully.

Nagisa didn’t always understand her logic, but he couldn’t fault the way she tried to make everything into a positive. It was a pretty earnest attitude that he kind of hoped would stick with her. He still felt bad about not being able to go, though. But Nagisa had known what he was signing up for, and he’d made his decisions, though honestly it hadn’t felt like he had much of a choice. Not he regretted it, he wouldn’t regret it for _anything_.

He let his classmates return to their planning, simultaneously wishing the day would end, and wishing it would last forever. Eventually the last bell rang, though, and Nagisa had to get a move on. Walking back to the train station had become pretty routine at least, and he could make it in good time. He didn’t rush, though- there wasn’t really much cause to. Perhaps he’d be able to avoid the grip Karma had on his heart, when he say him again.

Nagisa pepped himself up, the closer he got to home. It was a new day. That wasn’t saying much, he’d told himself the same thing for the last week and it hadn’t changed anything. Reluctantly, Nagisa finally reached his door, taking a deep breath to steel himself before opening it. By all appearances, it looked empty, though Nagisa knew somebody must be in considering the door was unlocked.

“I’m back,” he called lightly, garnering no response. That was pretty odd. He sighed, opening the door to his bedroom.

“Hey,” Karma said, not taking his eyes off the book he was reading. At first glance, he seemed pretty nonchalant, but there was clearly an underlying frustration across his face. It took Nagisa a moment, to fully examine the scene. Something crossed across Karma’s face, and Nagisa’s eyes were drawn to Daichi, who was resting half in his lap. He supposed it was pretty hard to concentrate, with a baby being completely active.

Nagisa couldn’t put up with it. “I’ll take him,” he said, reaching over.

If anything, Daichi seemed happy to be carried by Nagisa, presumably because it meant he had a higher view. Nagisa had stopped even bothering cradling him horizontally nowadays, only when he really had no other choice. The fuss just wasn’t worth it. The easiest way was to just carry him half over his shoulder. Unfortunately, as a sharp tug came to his head, Nagisa remembered that it gave Daichi perfect access to his hair, AKA his new favourite toy.

He took in the scene again. “Are you studying?”

“For midterms,” Karma explained, looking only a fraction more relieved.

“Already?” Nagisa knew, once he’d asked it out loud, that it was a bit of a stupid question. For quite a while, everyone had assumed that Karma was somehow naturally a genius. Whilst that was still definitely true, everyone discovered the hard way that actually being the _best_ took a lot of hard work. Nagisa figured staying at Kunugigaoka had been a good decision, if it meant he had Asano to compete against. At least, Nagisa assumed that was mostly why he was taking this so seriously, to stay at the top.

Karma, now with his arms free, pulled the book closer to his face. “Negative four over root X becomes,” he muttered aloud to himself, “negative four multiplied by one over X to the power of a half-“

Though he was pretty sure Karma had skipped over a step in his self-explanation, a sinking feeling set in Nagisa’s stomach. He should probably start thinking about studying himself, soon enough. Definitely a little closer to the actual exams, though, or else he’d probably end up forgetting everything he tried to keep in. At least Karma looked like he was focusing, eyes narrowed and forehead creasing slightly. It was kind of cute. Nagisa mentally slapped himself. Seriously, his _forehead_ was cute now? He definitely needed to get out of here.

“Uhm,” Nagisa started a little uselessly, as a plan started to form in his head. “I-if you want to study in peace, I can look after Daichi this week off.”

Karma peered up from his text book. “Nagisa, that’s-“

“-Only fair,” Nagisa cut him off, realising the clear advantage to this arrangement. Even if it did mean having Daichi to himself for a while, a little tough but hardly a _chore_ , it was the excuse he needed to avoid Karma at all costs. “You have him every day when I’m still at school,” he pointed out. “The hours would add up, by now.”

Clearly conflicted, Karma looked between him and the book. “Okay,” he finally said, as if it pained him. “Not all day, though.”

Trying not to look as relieved as he felt, Nagisa nodded. It wasn’t like he had to avoid Karma forever, just long enough for his feelings to disappear, and then they could go back to being friends as normal. Nagisa wasn’t really sure if they _would_ disappear, but he at least hoped he’d be able to get over them, to cope with them.    

“Do I have something on my face?” Karma met his eyes.

“W-wh-“ Nagisa felt an immediate spike of fear race up his spine. “No!”

He really didn’t look like he bought that. “Oh, so you’re staring at me for some other reason?”

“I wasn’t staring!” It wasn’t a particularly good defence. Nagisa had been too quick with his denial, easily proving it to be false.

Karma tossed the book aside, apparently deciding that tormenting Nagisa was worth putting studying off. Very slowly, almost cautiously, he began to slide off the bed. Feeling exactly like prey, Nagisa turned away, trying to come up with a plan on the fly. Turning around had also been pretty suspicious… He needed an excuse. Mentally apologising, Nagisa pretended he was just putting Daichi down in the crib. Surprisingly, he didn’t instantly start sobbing about being laid flat, instead choosing to entertain himself with his own foot.

“Then what were you doing, huh?” Karma said, so close behind him Nagisa could feel his breaths on the skin of his neck, though they weren’t actually touching. All he could do was stand frozen. When Nagisa didn’t respond, he bent down, so Nagisa could practically feel his lips moving against his ear. “Plotting to kill me?”

Breaths coming up short, Nagisa found himself turning around, contorting his body at the waist to face him. Karma was looking down at him through slightly lidded eyes, gleaming with mischief. Nagisa was tempted to try and flip him over and pin him to the ground, now he’d challenged him. It would be hard, considering Karma was probably on guard for something like that… Nagisa was almost frightened of what would happen, if he was pinning Karma to any kind of surface.

And then he heard the front door open, signifying his mother’s apparent return. Karma didn’t look too bothered by it, like he’d been expecting it almost, but Nagisa bounced back. Though the heat started to leave his body pretty quickly, the shame didn’t. He _really_ needed some time to himself. One of these days, he just knew he was going to end up going for it, lunging up and kissing Karma for real, and then where would he be?

However, as he found out, being alone had his own challenges. Not that he was really alone, the entire basis of his excuse to avoid Karma was that he was taking Daichi somewhere. But then Nagisa realised that there wasn’t actually much to _do_ at Daichi’s age. At least when Karma was with him, he could have a _conversation_. He could try and have a conversation with Daichi, but the most he’d get out of it was confused babbling.

He ended up circling one of the local parks a few times, and then bought a crepe when he ran out of ideas. Daichi seemed to be judging him, just a little, when he sat down to eat it. Although he’d cooperated in Nagisa’s time of need the other day, he still generally hated not being able to see things, so he’d finally given in and turned the pram into its conversion. It was hard to ignore the slight worried tug at his heart, now that he couldn’t keep an eye on Daichi at all times, but he did seem a lot happier.

Nagisa figured it was more interest rather than anything else, probably. He supposed he’d be confused by the concept of food if he didn’t know quite what to associate it with. Though he knew solid foods were a little while off, it was pretty good he seemed intrigued by it. That, or he was just following the motion. Whatever the case, the actual crepe was pretty good. Nagisa had gone for the strawberries and cream flavour in the end, not his usual choice but it seemed like it was calling his name. He hadn’t really eaten them since being pregnant, he’d had enough for a life time.

He took Daichi out when he was done eating, since he was shoving his fist into his mouth. It wasn’t as if Daichi was actually doing it all the time to tell him he was hungry, but it was a pretty good sign considering when he’d last been fed. He seemed even happier to be up essentially on Nagisa’s lap, so he didn’t put him back in again. That was at least slightly more entertaining. He wasn’t sure how much Daichi really understood, but Nagisa found himself pointing out certain things, carrying him around until he got too tired.

The next few days followed in a similar fashion. It was the height of a nationwide public holiday, so anywhere more interesting was pretty much a no go. The most exciting thing he did was buy Daichi a stuffed animal. Considering how grabby he was getting with Nagisa’s hair, it made sense to get him something to actually hold onto. Nagisa found he started to not mind it much at all in the end, finding Daichi’s reactions to everything fascinating, now his life had slowed down and he had the time to appreciate it.

Not to say the hours where he just napped weren’t a little more boring. Nagisa almost considered showing up to that party after all, but it would a little odd if he randomly turned up with a baby. It wasn’t as if Nagisa was massively against the idea of telling his friends about Daichi, it just wasn’t the type of thing that would come up in conversation. At that point, he’d left it long enough that it would be worse to casually bring it up.

Nagisa considered it for a moment. She was definitely right, they hadn’t seen each other since graduation. There had been a few meet ups here and there, before high school started for everyone, but Nagisa hadn’t felt like going to any. Regardless, it would be nice to see his friend after such a long time, plus it was something to do. 

He met Kayano just outside the set of whatever she was currently working on, in the end. She was already waiting for him, waving him over confidently. It hadn’t been that long since he last saw her, but she did look quite different. Most noticeably, her hair was back to its, natural brown and she wore it down, but she also looked more mature in general.

“Nagisa!” She exclaimed happily. “I’m glad you could come.”

He could only return her smile. “I’m happy you invited me. It must be pretty busy, if this is your only day off.”

Humming to herself, she shrugged. “It’s not so bad. Acting is what I love, so it doesn’t feel too much like a hard job. Plus, I still have high school on top of everything, so it’s nice to do it without worrying about falling behind.”

Nagisa nodded along, as they started to walk without much of an aim. He felt proud of her for getting back into something she was so clearly good at. Though in the end it had turned out to be her true feelings, she _had_ fooled him for over half a year. At the very least she seemed happy, and she wasn’t slacking on her academic work either.

“Anyway,” she turned to him. “Have you had a good time this break?”

He looked down at the pram he was wheeling and sighed. “I’ve mostly just been looking after Daichi.”

Kayano paused in her step, bending down in front. “Hi there Daichan, don’t think I forgot about you.”

“Is he awake?” Nagisa peered over the top.

Her attention was focused elsewhere, though. “I thought he’d have grown quite a bit more by now,” she confessed. “He’s still so little.” She looked up at Nagisa with a sort of mischievous glint in her eye. “Tiny… Daichi… You know that works…”

“Wait-“ Nagisa tried, but she’d clearly already formed the idea.

“If you combine it with the Japanese word for ‘small’, then… Daichiisai.”

Nagisa almost choked on his own saliva. “You can’t make him live with that nickname!”

She grinned. “But it kind of suits him now.”

As long as nobody else ever found out about it… Nagisa just didn’t want him to get teased or anything, but he supposed Kayano doing it was okay. She was pretty inventive with her nicknaming, anyway. After that, they continued to chat, mostly catching up on how everything was since they’d last seen each other.

“How come you’re looking after him this week, anyway? Is Karma kun sick or something?” Kayano eventually asked.

“Karma is…” There were many, _many_ different ways Nagisa could finish that sentence. “I’m avoiding him,” he admitted.

Kayano cocked her head. “Oh. Did he tease you too far again or something?”

He had no idea what even came over him. Nagisa opened his mouth in preparation to come up with some excuse, or to just dodge it all together, but that wasn’t what came out. He’d been practically bursting with feelings for what felt like aeons, and they ended up all tumbling out. Kayano kept pretty quiet, letting him talk freely, though she didn’t seem disinterested. Nagisa had never really ranted to her about anything before in their friendship, but there seemed to be no stopping him.

“That sounds… tough…” She eventually said, when Nagisa ran out of things to say.

Miserably, Nagisa looked dead ahead, focusing on nowhere in particular. “It’s… hard to describe, how frustrating it is being i-in love with your friend.”

“I get it,” she said, after a moment. Nagisa turned, noticing she too was looking out. “Do you think not knowing would make him happier?”

“I think so,” Nagisa admitted. “It’s definitely less complicated.”

“Then, you shouldn’t confess to anything. If you love someone, then the most important thing is that they’re happy, even if it hurts you to see it.”

That sounded like pretty good advice. On the flip side, Nagisa noticed how _good_ it felt to finally get those feelings out there, to not be hiding them. Perhaps if he told Karma, the weight would be gone, for good. He did feel like Kayano was right, though. This time apart, he guessed, was starting to prove it. Nagisa just didn’t know what to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chiisai (小さい) literally just means 'small' in Japanese. The chii sound is similar to the chi in Daichi, which is why it works. A direct translation of Daichiisai actually could be 'incredibly small', because 'Dai' means 'great'. If that makes any kind of sense :;) I love Japanese puns. 
> 
> Speaking of Japanese puns, if you know any of the language, then you'll realise EXACTLY how lazy my OC naming was :') 
> 
> Names we care about: 西 半助 - Nishi Hansuke  
> 南 空良 - Minami Sora  
> 北 蝶 - Kita Chou 
> 
> On another note, poor Kayano :')


	43. Teaching Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> First year midterms finally arrive

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alternative title: please dont murder me guys

“So…” Sakura said, craning her neck. “How did I do?”

Scanning across the paper one final time, Nagisa smiled. “You’re really improving, Sakura chan! You got twenty three out of twenty five right this time.”

She didn’t look so pleased. “Huh?!” She snatched her homework from him. “How did I get two _wrong_?”

Sighing at her impatience, he pointed it out on the paper. “This one you just forgot to carry the number over, but this,” he looked at a sequencing question, “is pretty complicated.”

Frowning, she looked at it again. “Let me change it, then.” 

“That’s a bad idea.” When she looked up at him with question, he continued. “If you didn’t quite get it on your own, and you’re not honest about it, then your teacher won’t know you struggled at that part. They wouldn’t be able to help you understand it better. I’ll do my best to explain it to you now, though.”

Sakura huffed, as she often did, but she didn’t make much of a protest. Now she’d started school for real again, she seemed to be taking everything more seriously. Since she was in sixth grade, she’d have to start thinking about junior high pretty soon. Still, he was proud of how far she’d come in the half a year or so that he’d known her. Whilst he didn’t exactly need to help her with the huge task of getting _in_ to a school, Nagisa still found himself tutoring her.

They were almost done, a light of understanding flickering behind her eyes, when Daichi finally chose to wake up. He didn’t immediately start crying, but Nagisa could tell the difference between happy and slightly displeased noises. “Sorry,” he said, stopping midsentence to pick Daichi up out of the pram.

“Is he mad or something?” Sakura cocked her head.

Nagisa looked him over. “Hungry, probably, at this point.”

She squinted. “How do you know that? I didn’t know you could speak _baby_.”

Though he could easily register the sarcasm in her tone, Nagisa suspected there was a hint of genuine curiosity. He supposed she might not have been near many babies that young before. Though, he realised with a twinge of sadness, Daichi definitely was getting older, rapidly. It still almost felt like he’d only been there for the blink of an eye, yet he was already three months old.

“Part of it’s just instinct,” he said eventually. “But he’s been asleep for a while without feeding.”

“Oh.” Sakura sounded, before looking up. “Can I hold him?”

A part of Nagisa wanted to immediately say no. Not that he didn’t trust Sakura specifically, he just disliked handing Daichi over to _anybody_ who didn’t know exactly what they were doing. Perhaps Karma had had it all right with the potential death threats if Daichi was dropped or else harmed in any way.

Nagisa smiled. “Here, now be very gentle, okay?”

She took to it pretty well. Nagisa kept a very close eye, coaching her through it, as she held him in a decent enough way. Actually feeding was far more difficult, but she listened to what he said, and was doing it correctly when he instructed her. Thankfully, Daichi was apparently in a good mood, deciding not to fuss or move around too much. Sakura looked pretty pleased with herself, at least, or maybe she was just purely enjoying the experience.

“Is that your _boyfriend_?” She asked, when his phone buzzed.

Nagisa jumped in fear. “K-karma’s not my boyfriend!”

A smirk came across her face. “Then how come you knew I was talking about him?”

Well, she had him there. She _really_ had him there, actually, because Nagisa’s throat went dry, and she met his eye with a slight gleam. And he’d been doing so _well_ too. With exams and everything he and Karma hadn’t exactly had time to have much of a conversation, more just existing in each other’s presence. It had been _extremely_ helpful, and Nagisa’s brain was beginning to adjust itself back to normal, finally. Or so he’d thought.

“Did you understand everything I said?” Nagisa deflected. “I think I’ll have to leave now.”

Mercifully, Sakura passed Daichi back over to him. “It wasn’t _hard_.”

Since Karma had texted him, Nagisa assumed he was done with his exam. Kunugigaoka’s midterms were a week earlier than his, which was both a good and bad thing. Now that Karma’s last one was over, at least Nagisa could throw himself fully into studying. Or, at least, that’s what he was planning on doing. He may not be in crazy competition like Karma was, but he still needed to do well.

After he said his goodbyes, Nagisa tried to keep his mind busy. Freshly up, he made the ‘sensible’ decision to just carry Daichi until he got bored, which was a _slight_ task. It was one of the few times Nagisa was actually glad of how small he was, because if he was heavier Nagisa would probably have struggled a lot more to carry him and push the pram at the same time.

Karma seemed in better spirits that he had been for a while, when they finally crossed paths. He waved, even, with a smile that didn’t seem to hide anything. Which immediately sent Nagisa’s senses into high alert, because sometimes Karma’s purer expressions were far more dangerous than his obvious ones.

Of course, Nagisa was mostly ignored, when he got close enough. “Yo Daichan~,” Karma immediately said, taking him into his arms. “Have a good day?”

It wasn’t as if Daichi could reply to him properly, but his face broke out in a heart stopping smile, and he let out a squeal kind of sound. Part of Nagisa hated that it was so cute, because he couldn’t feel any emotion other than a deep love. Honestly, if anybody wanted to strike an argument with him, all they needed to do was hold Daichi in front of him and no matter what, he wouldn’t even be mad about it.

“How did the exams go?” Nagisa asked, shamefully feeling a little jealous.

Finally, Karma snapped his eyes away. “Huh? Oh, they were _nothing_.”

Which probably meant they were challenging enough, in Karma Speak. It was hard to interpret, but Nagisa figured he was getting pretty good with it. There was no way he’d ever be able to read Karma perfectly, he’d accepted. Certain emotions were easier to understand than others, but Karma was almost expert at guarding himself when the situation really demanded it.

They didn’t have a whole lot on their plate after that. Due to exams throwing a small blip in their unofficial routines, things had gotten a little weird, which was why Nagisa had taken Daichi tutoring with him. He knew it would be over soon enough, but it was like there was a weird kind of air surrounding him. Like static in the air before a lightning storm.

“I don’t feel like going home,” Karma said. “Let’s do something.”

Nagisa blinked. “Y-you know _I_ still have to study?”

His eyes glinted. “You’ll do fine, and there’s plenty of time for that.”

 _Says the person who just studied non stop for weeks_ , Nagisa thought. And then he considered it. Maybe, at the end of the day, this could actually be a pretty good thing. Now that he was slowly and surely overcoming his feelings for Karma, less blinded by them with every passing minute, it would be a test of sorts. If he could successfully make it through time (presumably alone, if you didn’t count Daichi) with Karma, then he didn’t need to avoid him so much.

“Like what?” Nagisa dared to ask, his voice a little small.

It became apparent that Karma hadn’t exactly thought his plan through. “I don’t know,” he shrugged. “We could go catch a movie or something.”

Nagisa couldn’t help but stare blankly at Daichi. “I don’t think there’s any chance of him sitting still and quiet for that long.”

There wasn’t a lot of baby appropriate things to do in Kunugigaoka anyway. Or, at least, Nagisa wouldn’t even really know where to look. Nothing particularly fun, or what _he’d_ consider fun, would suit him. It was a problem he’d never really thought he’d be facing, which was almost hilarious. There had to be something else out there, other than walking around and occasionally getting food.

“The park?” Karma suggested.

It sounded a little lame, but he supposed it was the best option. It was the start of evening, so nobody else was there when they got to the park closest to Nagisa’s apartment block. Not exactly a prime hang out location, it made sense. They’d never taken Daichi there before, so it was a pretty new experience, even if he was too young to appreciate much of any of it. Nagisa could see it over his face, alert and taking in information.

Just sitting quietly in a park was even worse than going there in the first place, so they ended up near the baby swings, which really looked like the only thing even somewhat suitable. The main problem was how tiny he was. Looking at the size of those swings compared to him, Nagisa was pretty sure he could slide right through the gaps. Though they were beginning to swap over, Nagisa could still fit him into newborn sized clothes if he really wanted to.

“Want a go?”  He asked aloud. At least Karma was sensible enough to see the same issue, lowering a pretty confused Daichi into the bucket thing very carefully. Once he was in it, Nagisa could tell he was supporting his back fully, rather than leaving him to just flop over.

Meanwhile, Daichi looked a combination of confused and impressed at this new experience. It wasn’t as if he could enjoy it to the full extent, even when Karma rocked him a little, but eventually he seemed to decide he was happy about it. Nagisa let go of his apprehension, crouching down himself with a smile. Once he got used to it, or perhaps because Karma pushed the roughness a little far, his face really broke out into a wide grin, and he let out what Nagisa interpreted was meant to be a high pitched giggle.

“Would you rather get a cat or dog?” Karma asked, out of nowhere.

Nagisa had no idea what he was talking about. “What do you mean?”

“Not right now,” he shrugged, “but someday. I think we should get a pet.”

“A… pet…?”

Karma scooped Daichi out of the seat, stretching with his free arm. “I guess we’d have to live somewhere pretty big if we got a dog, and cats are less high maintenance. But dogs have more of a clear personality.”

Somehow, Nagisa felt they’d skipped quite a few steps of this conversation. They’d never talked about any kind of plans for the future, let alone adopting _animals_. Sharing a child through less than desirable circumstances was one thing, but purposely sharing a pet? And living together, in a large residence, apparently? Part of Nagisa was a little scared, that Karma had clearly thought this through at some point, whilst the rest of him was about to have an emotional meltdown.

“I haven’t exactly thought about that kind of thing,” Nagisa admitted.

Any conversation died down after that. They only stayed there for a little more, before heading home. Daichi was pretty much out of it at that point, so they didn’t really spend much time catching up with his parents (his father had been spending increasingly longer times in the apartment). For the first time in a while, despite the ever present tug on his heart strings, Nagisa felt oddly settled.

Of course, it couldn’t last long. Right after that he really did throw himself into studying, right up until the days of his first exams. Without any kind of crazy stakes, other than his own success and dignity, Nagisa didn’t feel particularly nervous about them. Even when the test begun, and it was just him with pen and paper, surprisingly he kept his cool. 

Maybe it was because of the insane difficulty of their exams the last year, due to their constant battling with A Class, but Nagisa didn’t find himself stretching too far, though it definitely wasn’t easy. At the end of his first day, practically everyone in the class complained about it, minus Kita who spent most of her time rolling her eyes at them.

By the end of the second day, Nagisa felt pretty good about his chances of getting a decent score, despite being just a little mentally exhausted. To follow was perhaps the worst part; waiting for everything to be graded. Nagisa decided it would probably be best to just put his mind at rest and move forwards, though. Due to the day being just tests, Nagisa was allowed to leave earlier than he usually would have.

It wasn’t particularly exciting. His friends were going out to ‘celebrate’, but Nagisa instead had seen a ‘gleaming’ opportunity. By calculations, he could make it the Kunugigaoka High’s campus by the time Karma’s lessons would ordinarily finish. Which, he’d found, meant that they could do a quick spot of child free shopping without feeling bad about it. The height of his recent existence, truly.

By the time he actually arrived, it seemed the day was already over. It felt a little odd, going near his old school. Nagisa was internally so focused on moving forwards, he supposed he hadn’t dedicated a lot of time to looking back. He honestly felt a little awkward standing there, as people he recognised spilled out, off to go on with their normal lives. Nagisa just waited, hoping nobody would look at him too closely, but Karma was nowhere to be found.

For a moment, Nagisa wondered if he’d just forgotten or something, but with Karma that was pretty unlikely. When the stream of students came to an end, Nagisa could only hope Karma hadn’t gotten himself into any trouble. He hadn’t entered the actual grounds yet, only peering around every now and then to check. At the sight of red hair coming from the building, Nagisa felt a spike of hope, until he realised it was, when he opened his eyes and shot him a kind of beckoning loom, actually Asano.

“Nagisa kun,” he commented, when Nagisa came close enough. “What brings you here?”

Nagisa found himself smiling, because it had actually been quite a while since he’s see him. “I’m meant to be meeting Karma. Do you have any idea where he is?”

“Akabane kun is…” Asano huffed. “I don’t know actually. Hanging around somewhere probably.”

“He didn’t skip or anything, right?” He couldn’t help but ask.

Asano muttered something that sounded an awful lot like ‘I wish he had’, before straightening. “What, did he leave you high and dry again?”

He awkwardly laughed that one off. “How did the exams go for you?”

Something odd came across Asano’s face, like a mix between anger and pain. It was only really in his eyes, though, the rest of him remaining rigid. If Nagisa had to make a wild guess, then Karma had retained his top spot, whilst Asano had come second again. Of course, Asano was never going to admit that to him – this was a personal score, unlike their junior high final exams. Nagisa would have to get it out of Karma later.  

“Good enough,” he said quickly. “Say, Nagisa, seems you’re not busy right now.”

Nagisa didn’t like the sound of that at all. “No… I guess not.”

He smiled, but it was more chilling than light and natural. “Remember our agreement?”

Brow creasing, Nagisa wracked his memory. “Agreement?”

“Mmm,” Asano took a step closer to him. “You forgot to get me a birthday gift, we made a deal. Anything within reason.”

It came flooding back to him. Nagisa had been so _upset_ , when they had that conversation. Looking back on it, mostly he was overwhelmed, and anything would have set him off. Walking away from Karma that day had practically broken his heart, and now Nagisa understood _why_. Not that it had done him much good, because things had worked out as he initially feared they would, in the end.

“Okay,” Nagisa said. “You can have your gift.”

Asano raised an eyebrow a little, folding his arms. “It has two parts. The first is that you absolutely cannot breathe a word of this to anybody.”

That made Nagisa realise that whatever Asano was about to ask of him could be disastrous. On the other hand, though, he was protected by his conditions. Nagisa had definitely specified that it had to be within reason, so he was more than welcome to reject anything dreadful. At least agreeing to it right there and then would free Nagisa from doing something potentially worse in the future.

“Alright,” he said. “I’ll agree to that.”

Asano sighed. “I have a crush.”

 _That_ , Nagisa hadn’t been expecting. It was hard to imagine Asano caring about anybody enough, especially in a romantic sense. He supposed it made sense, but at the same time, he didn’t know how he could be of any help. Asano was attractive and popular enough with his own merit, and could charm just about anybody if he really wanted to.

He coughed, when Nagisa didn’t question him. “I want you to show me that kiss thing.”

“W-what?!” Nagisa immediately jumped back.

“Relax, Nagisa kun,” he sighed. “It fits within the ‘reasonable’ conditions, doesn’t it? It’s not like you haven’t done it before.”

He attempted to calm himself down. “So that’s what you want?” He asked quietly. “You just want me to k-kiss you? Right now? Here?”

“More like a lesson, really.”

It felt kind of like cheating. Which was ridiculous, because he wasn’t even in a relationship with Karma, and thus there was nothing to betray by doing this with Asano. He was right, too, Nagisa had already kissed him, even if it was only to take him out as quickly as possible. Then, there was also the moral dilemma of Nagisa showing him something that was technically an assassination move, though it wasn’t the _worst_ one…

“Fine,” Nagisa said, not looking him in the eye. 

Apparently, Asano wasn’t in the mood to waste time, because suddenly there were hard hands cupping his face, tugging it up, and then a slightly painful clash of lips against his. Nagisa wasn’t quite sure what to make of it. Admittedly, it was a pretty bad kiss no matter how you looked at it, even _if_ there was only one person on the planet he actually wanted to kiss. It was more like Asano was trying to eat his face off, than anything else. It was violent and forceful, far too much teeth, and Nagisa couldn’t have returned it even if he wanted to.

Mercifully, he pulled off. “So?”

“Uhm…” Nagisa wasn’t sure how to approach this. A part of him felt that maybe he should actually teach Asano constructively. “You’re going in too hard. You can still dominate a kiss without leaving your partner behind. Start out slower, get them to relax into it before going for any of the deeper stuff.”

Surprisingly, he looked like he was paying a lot of attention. A little flustered with embarrassment, Nagisa knew the only way he could really teach this technique was to demonstrate it. Tentatively, he raised himself onto the balls of his feet, reaching out _gently_ for Asano’s cheek. It wasn’t so much of a do or die situation, so he could take the time to show him properly.

Asano didn’t try to change the pace himself or anything, and Nagisa could tell he was concentrating. After a little while, and some slight encouragement, he actually kissed back, matching him. Nagisa was prepared to leave it at that, rather than go for any rapid hits. Now that Asano was expecting it, it would be pretty hard to get a total overkill, without resorting to anything drastic.

“Okay?” Nagisa said, pulling away.

The only warning he got was a flash of fire in Asano’s eye, before he was being kissed _again_. This time, though, with Asano’s actual lips rather than his whole mouth. It took Nagisa by surprise, stumbling enough that he had to be steadied, and he instinctively wound his arms around his neck. It demonstrated just how quickly Asano could learn, because this was worlds apart from the first attempt. It wasn’t quite at the level that he could get hits in, but that just came with practise. He didn’t really _feel_ anything though, other than mechanical technicalities. Nagisa was slightly flustered by the end of it, forcibly detaching them to catch breath.

Instead of looking at him, Asano was staring somewhere. “Look who finally showed up.”

Nagisa wanted to melt directly into the floor. Sure enough, that was the moment Karma had decided to come out of the school. There was absolutely no chance he hadn’t seen at least _some_ of that, and to his horror, Nagisa realised that he couldn’t even explain it, since he’d promised. Not that Karma seemed to want to stop for a confrontation. He walked straight past them, his face neutral rather than angry. Nagisa hated the part of himself that wished the opposite.

“S-see you, Asano kun,” Nagisa got out, following after Karma.

Even when he caught up, Karma didn’t say anything to him, didn’t start yelling at him. Why was that even something Nagisa wanted? Were they just not going to talk about it, like everything else? There were many things Nagisa couldn’t tell him, couldn’t voice into words, but this at least he had to give at least _some_ explanation for.

“I-“

“See who you want to see, Nagisa,” Karma cut him off, before he could even really start. “Why would I care?”

Nagisa stopped in his paces. Of course not. Why _would_ Karma care? He deflated, like his heart just spilled out into the floor. He _had_ to get over this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Karma's internal thoughts : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7wfYIMyS_dI
> 
> Look, okay, I did say this fic isn't anywhere near complete. AKA, they're not gonna be happy and in love... yet... hehe 
> 
> I hope you all enjoyed this one! As always, comments and feedback motivate me to write faster :D


	44. Thoughts Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the kiss between Gakushuu and Nagisa, the dynamic between the three of our boys gets frosty

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This got real angsty real fast

In truth, Gakushuu didn’t really feel bad about it. He wasn’t a senselessly malicious person, he would never set out to hurt somebody without cause. It hadn’t even been something he’d _planned_ to do. Of course, he hadn’t been expecting Nagisa to show up at all. Everything else had just been opportunistic, a plan made up on the fly.

It wasn’t like Akabane didn’t deserve it. Perhaps Gakushuu had been a little more worked up than he usually would have been, though, due to the midterms. Even the thought of it made his stomach turn over, and he clenched his teeth. He should have taken his top spot back with ease, but there he was, with a total score of 499/500, shamefully the same exact mark. Getting _even_ best wasn’t inherently the worst thing in the world, worlds less humiliating than finals last year.

At least Akabane had somewhat of an excuse. A single stroke missed from an uncommon kanji in their Japanese test? It could happen to anybody. But no, once again, it had somehow been maths that let Gakushuu down. Right at the start of the paper, too, he’d messed up an _easy_ question. Not wanting to run out of time like with finals, he’d gone through the first questions as quickly as possible, cutting the time spent on them in half. It had been an easy question that, naturally, Akabane had taken great pleasure of pointing out.

“ _You forgot to add the one_?” He’d laughed in a way that wasn’t meant to show mutual humour. “ _You even wrote it right there in your equation_.”                   

Humiliating. Or, at least, it could have been. Gakushuu had been taught not to show weakness, so he’d just unclenched his fist, keeping his entire form as neutral as possible. If Akabane wanted to gloat, then, all he had to do was not react to it. Showing he was above it was far better for his reputation. It was easier said than done, but he’d managed it, even if he’d been close to boiling over the the edge by the end of the day.

So perhaps Gakushuu had told a few white lies. For a start, he _definitely_ didn’t have any crushes – he shuddered a little at the thought – and he’d known a little more about Akabane’s whereabouts than he’d let on. But he’d weighed out his options, and taken advantage of the opportunity. It wasn’t like he didn’t have a reason. He didn’t really feel as if he was ‘using’ Nagisa either. That whole promise thing had been _his_ idea, after all. 

“How were the tests?” His father asked, over dinner.

Gakushuu gripped his fork. “You’ll get the report card.”

They considered each other almost mutually, for a moment. Eating dinner together had been a trend recently. Gakushuu wasn’t exactly sure how he felt about it. He knew he didn’t _hate_ it, but it was clearly a little forced. After so many years of eating alone, he supposed it was hard to break the habit (ignoring how admittedly ‘okay’ he had been with it when Nagisa was there).

“More water?” Toboso offered, as if that would defuse the situation.

His father simply raised a hand, dismissing him from the room. “Did you regain your top position?”

He couldn’t help but turn his head slightly. “Technically.” But how could he count it? No matter how he looked at it, it was failure.

“You only have yourself to overcome,” he said, expressing morphing into something _softer_. It freaked him out.

Gakushuu wasn’t sure what he meant. He didn’t want to ask, though. And so their meal returned once again to silence. His father was being ridiculous, anyway. Gakushuu had plenty to overcome, clearly. He would, though. Getting a slight jab in at Akabane… It wasn’t an outright win, but it was a start. A chip his exterior, or more, maybe. Not that it was of any interest to Gakushuu, but he couldn’t put his finger on it. If his senses were telling in the truth, then Akabane had a kind of obsession with Nagisa. He’d been aware of it for months, of course, he’d even _told_ Nagisa about his suspicions.

He also knew that Nagisa didn’t return it. Every time he’d even alluded to any connection between the two of them, Nagisa had swiftly denied it. Though the rush of his answer made Gakushuu consider that it possibly wasn’t entirely truthful, everything else made Nagisa seem genuine, unless he was some kind of expert at hiding his feelings. Anyway, it was simple. It was a lesson for Akabane’s arrogance, parading the very thing he couldn’t have right in front of him.

It would be wise for Akabane to just let it go. Clearly, though, as Gakushuu discovered the next morning, that wasn’t the case. _Predictably_. There was no sign of Akabane when he first arrived, slipping off his outdoor shoes. Then again, Gakushuu always did turn up early. Maybe, if he was lucky, Akabane had decided to skip. Gakushuu was more than aware of his reputation for that, but he hadn’t actually missed a lesson during high school.

Not that Gakushuu _cared_ , of course. He’d already done enough, to just leave it. He had nothing left to say to Akabane on the subject. When he wracked through his mind, it was definitely the best course of action. So he decided to go on with his day. Pretty average, really; walk to class, sit as desk, arrange pens, prepare to perch high above the others…

He didn’t talk to anybody as they filtered in, which probably demonstrated his bad mood. Not that Gakushuu really tried to make conversation unless he had an express reason for it, though he at least usually acknowledged his classmates. Being a firm leader was one thing, a completely cold and rude one was another. Mostly, he kept his eyes fixed dead on the blackboard, until Akabane finally showed himself.

Feeling the tension stretch out in the room like thread about to snap, Gakushuu could feel the eyes on him. He didn’t indulge them, instead keeping his own gaze fixed dead ahead, making the shunning obvious. Predictably, irritation thickened in the air. Perhaps he should have left it like that, let Akabane suffer some more, but his scent was churning his stomach (it had been very hard to ignore how it clung to Nagisa), and he didn’t feel like putting up with it all day.

“What?” He bit out, like he was tired.

Akabane’s tone was laced with seriousness. “Let’s go somewhere for a chat.”

Gakushuu looked him dead in the eyes. “Don’t be ridiculous. Class is about to start.”

It seemed like he’d excepting that. There was a flash in Akabane’s eyes, before he turned around, casually strolling out of the class room. He looked over his shoulder, as he reached the door, like he was inviting Gakushuu to follow. Obviously, Gakushuu shouldn’t give in to what he wanted. He _knew_ that, and yet… somehow, he found his feet moving in pursuit.

He had better not get written up or anything for this. Gakushuu followed him through the hallway, avoiding being caught by anybody else, until they were outside. It was kind of eerie, being around a school building without much noticeable activity, though Gakushuu was used to that kind of thing by then. Finally, apparently satisfied, Akabane came to a stop. He turned to face Gakushuu, hair blowing in the light wind.

 _Don’t get intimidated_ , Gakashuu reminded himself, feeling the chill of the glare spouting from his cool, metallic eyes.

“So,” Akabane begun. “Yesterday.”

Gakushuu raised an eyebrow. “Is there a problem?”

It wasn’t exactly fresh rage, when Akabane really glared at him. Knowing his personality, if it were, he’d probably be dodging punches at this point. No, this was something thought about, slept on, dug deep. Not that there was anything Akabane could say or do to him. Gakushuu knew of his fighting reputation, had seen glimpses through his own eyes, but he was certain he could hold his own at minimum.

“Look,” he said, slightly more nonchalant. “You can do whatever with Nagisa, I don’t care. But. Don’t _use_ him.”

Oh, so that was his problem? Gakushuu was aware of his feelings, otherwise he wouldn’t have done it to begin with, but this was pathetic. “Are you really in any kind of position to be making demands, Akabane?”

“No less than you.”

Gakushuu rolled his eyes. “It was a rhetorical question. Ever heard of those?” He just couldn’t help himself. “What’s it to you anyway?”

“It’s simple,” he said. “I disagree with unnecessarily harming people, so I stop it.”

“As far as I’m aware, you’re not Nagisa’s significant other.” This really was Akabane’s own fault. If he’d left it, Gakushuu wouldn’t have had any more reason to completely put him in his place. “Has Nagisa himself told you to speak to me? Because if not, on what grounds is this anything to do with you?”

If Akabane could shoot bullets from his eyes, Gakushuu would have been a dead man.

“Why are you playing coy with me, _huh_? I’m just saying, don’t drag Nagisa into it.”

In just a few seconds, Gakushuu had a debate with himself. Clearly, Akabane was delusional. It would probably be more effective to just leave Akabane to it, to let him suffer forever in this weird cycle of _love,_ or whatever it was. He could use this, exploit it for his own benefit. But, long term potential aside, Gakushuu wasn’t _sadistic_. Perhaps giving Akabane the cold hard truth would be a good thing, a good _deed_. It may be painful at first, but, really it would end up benefitting him.

“Listen to yourself. Or do you need me to spell it out for you? _Nagisa doesn’t care_. Are you forgetting who took him in all that time ago? Do you know how many times over just a few months he insisted there was nothing between you two? It was the first thing he even said, ‘we’re not lovers and we never will be’. Perhaps your _clearly unrequited_ obsession with him is what’s truly harmful here?”

“You-“

“And next time,” Gakushuu continued, “why don’t you ask Nagisa who dried his tears every time _you_ did something senseless?” He straightened himself, his yearly quota for noble behaviour fulfilled. “I’m returning to class now.”

* * *

It was safe to say Karma was miserable. Not just about his ‘discussion’ with Asano, he was more _mad_ about that than any other emotion, but everything else. Somehow, it didn’t matter how much he knew he didn’t have the right to be jealous over what happened, it still hurt like every single one of his limbs was being stabbed, allowed to heal, and then stabbed again. And then, after the initial bite, he was furious. This unofficial war between the two of them, it was nothing to do with Nagisa, and every inch of him boiled with the petty blow that was tugging him into it, _using_ him.

Not like it wasn’t exactly what he’d do if he were in Asano’s place, though. Perhaps that’s what made it worse.

Considering how often Karma used words as a weapon, he should know better than to let verbal combat get to him. And yet, he couldn’t stop thinking about what Asano said. It kept playing over and over, like a jammed tape. Then there was doubt. Asano could easily be lying to him, it would make more sense for him to do so, and yet, Karma believed every damn word he’d said.

When it came to Nagisa, it was like dealing with an enigma. Karma could never be too certain of what was around the corner, what Nagisa was thinking. Letting his hopes slide up had been his own fault, though. He wasn’t _blind_. Of course he’d noticed Nagisa watching him, flushing at certain moments without proper reason. So he’d turned it up a little, teasing him whenever he could, watching for any kind of incriminating reactions. There were bigger issues than Nagisa potentially having a crush or something on him, though, so Karma had yet to directly bring it up.

Asano was right. He was no good for Nagisa, not really. It wasn’t like Karma hadn’t _known_ that, it was one of his reasons why he never planned on telling him his true feelings. Assuming Asano was referring to the times where they’d fought, when Karma had seen Nagisa’s tears for himself… Had Karma _really_ cared about putting them there? Truthfully, Nagisa deserved somebody who would be struck with true horror at the thought of hurting him.

 _‘Obsessed’_ , he thought to himself, _was a ridiculous claim._ He wasn’t _obsessed_ with Nagisa. There were plenty of things he could do, without Nagisa so much as crossing his mind. Although, he supposed, he did let his thoughts slip to Nagisa quite often. But it wasn’t like it was _unhealthy_. Potentially, it could be much worse, he could be going full crazy alpha and banning Nagisa from so much as _speaking_ to anyone else.

Karma had no idea why it stung so much, because Asano hadn’t exactly told him _new_ information. He’d just killed a miniscule flicker of hope, really. He didn’t know why it continued to trouble him. But intelligently, he knew moping about it forever wasn’t going to help him much, so he did the best he could to steel himself, to return like nothing was bothering him.

The end of the school day was both a blessing and a curse. Part of Karma screamed to turn the other direction, to run far away from his problems, but there was a force that stopped him. He had responsibilities now, something he wouldn’t change for the _world_ , but also something that meant he couldn’t just avoid everything and everyone.

Walking back to Nagisa’s apartment was at that point a familiar journey. Despite spending so much time there, Karma refused to refer to it as ‘home’. Doing so would only dig himself in deeper, plus it made him feel even more like a stray. He was only there out of necessity, but that didn’t mean he actually hated it.

Nagisa’s mother gestured him in greeting, not actually saying anything. Occasionally, they’d talk, but he supposed she wasn’t really in the mood for it.   

“Ah, Karma kun,” Nagisa’s father, who had been spending increasingly more time around the place, greeted. He had Daichi propped up in his lap with a bottle, which meant there was one less thing for Karma to worry about. “Good day at school?”

Lying through his teeth, he decided, was the best option. “It was alright.”

He wasn’t good at the whole family conversation thing. Not that they were really his family, though he supposed it was technically close enough considering they were his son’s grandparents. Even when he was really young, his parents had never really spoken to him like that, more interested in telling him some story about travelling if they felt like engaging in conversation, than hearing about something as mediocre as his _school_ day.

At least he had Daichi to cheer him up, for as long as it took Nagisa to get home. Presumably, he’d just woken up from a nap or something, because he seemed pretty alert. Karma sighed, sitting down with him at the desk chair. Naturally, Daichi wasn’t particularly content with that arrangement, immediately squirming. Karma guessed he was trying to grab something, and decided to sacrifice one of Nagisa’s pencils. There was an attempt to keep hold of it, all but forgotten when Karma accidentally brushed his toes, causing him to giggle. It brought a smile to his face, at least.

And then Nagisa actually came home. Karma barely noticed anything, until Nagisa was sliding the door open, and set down his bag. Last night, following the kiss, they hadn’t spoken more than they’d physically had to. It seemed, when neither of them said anything, they were about to follow that trend. Nagisa being in the room with him, though, filled his brain to the brim uncomfortably.

Karma got up, practically thrusting Daichi into Nagisa’s arms. “I’m going for a walk.”

His eyes widened, though he made no attempt to stop Karma. It was for the best, because if Nagisa had said anything, Karma might have suffocated right there and then. He grabbed the blazer part of his school uniform, since it was in reach, and quickly tugged it on as he made his way out to the balcony. No way was he walking out the normal way.

“W-wait-“ Nagisa said, like he was finally waking up.

Not indulging him, Karma quickly calculated his path, and leapt off. Thankfully, his parkour skills weren’t getting rusty in the slightest, and soon he was on the ground. Karma hadn’t exactly planned what he was going to do, he realised. It was quickly becoming summer, and the sun still shined bright in the sky. So, he just walked, aimlessly, trying to find something to think about other than Nagisa.

Eventually, the ache of his stomach gave him at least something to do. Even walking around the store and then eating the slightly weird selection he found didn’t help, not really. His legs were even starting to hurt, as he walked over practically every inch of the small town they lived in. Somehow, every street managed to remind him of Nagisa.

The rub of metal over his chest, too, screamed out for him. Irritated enough, Karma reached for the lining of his school uniform, and tugged out the pin into his hand. It was really stupid, but wearing it had become a given, as natural as wearing a watch or socks or something. His thumb toyed with the figure, a tiny chibi Sonic Ninja figure that Nagisa bought him for his birthday. There wasn’t much reason for it, Karma had just… worn it since that day. It was the best birthday gift he’d ever gotten.

Debating it for a moment, Karma refastened the pin, brimming with frustration. Feeling like this was a kind of pain he wouldn’t know how to put into words. If he had less self respect, he would have called it ‘pining’. As the sun finally went down, Karma seemed to be reaching some kind of edge, boiling over the point of anger. Completely alone in some kind of park (which appeared more for exercise purposes than playing), Karma let it take him for a moment, and he swung a fist at some metal bars.

Pain coursed through his knuckles, and he knew that hadn’t been the smartest of ideas. He unclenched his hand and flexed his fingers, just to check he hadn’t broken any of them. They all moved okay, though Karma could tell it was going to bruise. In a sick kind of way, the physical pain was an apt distraction from the emotional one, and he embraced it.

Exhaustion finally coming upon him, Karma scaled the metal frame he’d just punched, and then lay flat, ignoring the uncomfortable way the metal bards pressed into his back. Above him, the moon came out, shining low and bright in the sky. After everything with Korosensei, the moon was beginning to lose its crescent shape, small chunks crumbling off it. In just a decade or so, it would return to its normal sphere, or so the experts said.

What would Korosensei tell him to do? Probably not ‘avoid your problems and hope they just go away’, Karma knew. He’d probably advise Karma to look ahead, vaguely, because why would he just make it easy and _give_ Karma the answer? Karma tried his best. He and Nagisa couldn’t go on with this, he was more than aware. He also couldn’t tell Nagisa the truth behind his feelings, so what was left? Ignore this blip? Push past it until it didn’t hurt anymore?

He found Nagisa on the balcony when he returned, right where he’d left him, staring up at the moon for himself. For a blissful moment, Nagisa didn’t notice him, clearly lost in his own thoughts. Just watching him, Karma’s breath caught in his throat. There he was, beautiful Shiota Nagisa, parent to his child, and the only person Karma could even imagine loving.

“Oh,” Nagisa said, barely looking up at him. “You came back.”

Standing completely still, Karma wasn’t sure what to say. He couldn’t lose Nagisa, he just couldn’t. An existence of hell, pushing aside every one of his feelings, playing the friend and acting happy when he inevitably ended up in the arms of someone else – all of it was worth it, so long as Nagisa was still by his side.

Unable to take it anymore, embarrassingly, Karma found himself flinging his arms around Nagisa. He seemed a little taken aback for a moment, not moving until Karma squeezed him tighter, hiding his face and heavy eyes in Nagisa’s hair. Apparently Nagisa had mercy on him, because he hugged Karma back after that, no questions asked. At least, right then, Karma knew that the tension between them was forgotten. Despite himself, he couldn’t bear the thought of letting go again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To be fair to Asano, he's telling the truth as HE understands it... Heh... 
> 
> Imagine a world where Nagisa and Karma just discussed their feelings? They'd be halfway to their honeymoon by now *sigh* 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed this one! I promise, the next chapter isn't as depressing. As always, I appreciate any comments and feedback!


	45. Celebration Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nagisa's birthday rolls around

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally some fluff

Things both changed and didn’t change after everything went down. Nagisa couldn’t help but feel like there was some kind of invisible air bubble between him and Karma now, although neither of them seemed to acknowledge it. Regardless, they were still friends, and it was getting to the point that Nagisa could at least ignore the tug on his heart, which before was a constant, disorientating problem.

Finally, their lives fell into a kind of normalcy. Or, as normal as it could possibly be for them. Not a lot really happened in between midterms and finals, aside from Daichi finally getting too big for newborn sized clothes (an achievement long overdue, though it didn’t come without sadness). As it stood, they’d both passed the first term of high school, and, Nagisa blearily realised when he woke up that morning, it was the last day before summer.

“Hey, Nagisa,” Karma nudged him. “No sleeping in.”

That was rich, coming from him. If Nagisa didn’t physically (with great difficulty) force him up on weekends, Karma would happily spend until _noon_ in bed. Ordinarily, Nagisa wouldn’t have much of an issue waking up, but Daichi had had a bad night, and as a result, so had he. He suspected he must be teething or something (basically confirmed after Karma had decided it would be a good idea to feel his gums, which had only caused more crying, because _really Karma how would you like it if someone shoved their fingers inside your mouth?_ ), and aside from crying every couple of hours, Daichi had apparently decided that Nagisa and _Only Nagisa_ was allowed to hold him.

“Will you get up if I give you your gift?” Karma said lightly.

Huh? Gift? And then Nagisa remembered, not only was it the last day of school, but it was also his birthday. Compared to last year, his circumstances were _slightly_ better. Being sixteen and at least a little sure of where the future might take him was a stark difference to being fifteen, pregnant, and essentially homeless. It hadn’t been _all_ bad, Asano had bought him ice cream which was pretty nice.

Nagisa forced himself to sit up, which was a challenge due to the child on his chest. He was surprised Daichi was staying so still, contently drooling on him. Perhaps the disadvantage of taking cat naps was finally catching up with him. It still made Nagisa feel uneasy, despite how peaceful Daichi seemed right then, to know he was in _any_ kind of pain.

“Maybe,” he said, a little weakly, his voice still groggy from sleep.

Guessing he’d need his arms for this, he detached Daichi from himself, sitting him down on the bed. Somewhat amusingly, he hadn’t quite got the hang of sitting up by himself yet, and toppled sideways within a few seconds. At least it seemed to perk him up, as he started giggling about it, before rolling over sideways. In fact, Daichi was finding himself _hilarious_ as he did this, frantically rolling back and forth like a fish out of water, a little strange to watch but at least he was amusing himself. Eventually he stopped for a moment, flat on his back, and stuck his arms out vaguely in Karma’s direction.

Karma didn’t hesitate, picking him up off the bed. “So _now_ you want me to hold you, huh?”

The only reply he got was a tiny cough.

“Anyway,” Karma said, bending down to pick whatever it was up, a tiny bit harder with Daichi clinging to him, “there you go.”

Accepting the present, Nagisa looked at it quizzically. It was pretty big and hardly a consistent shape like a box or something. The wrapping seemed a little haphazard and messy, but Nagisa was surprised he’d bothered with it to begin with. Frankly, Nagisa hadn’t expected a gift of _any_ kind. He found a weakness in the wrapping, ripping it a little, which caused a tiny pen to fall out and onto his lap. Nagisa picked it up, confused about how something so small had needed so much paper. It was pretty cute, actually, just a regular biro except it had a little sushi roll decoration stuck to the top of it.

He was just about to say thank you, when he noticed a different colour of paper peeking out through the tiny rip he’d created. Confused, Nagisa removed the paper properly, only to find essentially a whole new gift inside. He looked up at Karma, but he didn’t supply him with any explanation, so he ripped the next layer open. It kept going and going, until Nagisa was sporting a pretty impressive selection of sushi themed stationary.

“You really got all this?” Nagisa found himself asking, as he admired the prawn sushi shaped USB stick. “I only gave you a _pin_.”

Karma shrugged, sitting down beside him. “You can return the favour in half a year.”

He couldn’t hold back his smile, as he came to what he figured was the last layer. This time, nothing small fell out, and, by the looks of it, there was nothing else. Tentatively, Nagisa picked up the material, looking at it with horror. It was a kind of tie dye design, which wasn’t really his style anyway but definitely not the _worst_ part. Across the front, in black letters, the English words ‘ _chocolate fucking jesus’_. Nagisa was taken aback by the phrase, repeated three times, on the t shirt. Occasionally he saw weird shirts from cheap places with questionable translations out and about, but never quite like _that_.

“K-karma?!” Nagisa spluttered. “What-“

Karma snickered. “You know that market in town? The one that sells all those cheap clothes?”

“Let me guess,” he narrowed his eyes. “You couldn’t resist.”

“Maybe I saw it and thought of you~” Karma joked, and then laughed properly. “Your _face_.”

Ignoring Karma finding any excuse to tease him, admiring the gifts, he really loved them all. Of course, Nagisa didn’t like sushi _that_ much, not to the extent that he was being branded with, but it was all _thoughtful_. The T Shirt was classic Karma, though, which put Nagisa back into the territory he knew. Not that he was ever planning on _wearing_ that.

Right, Nagisa thought, brain catching up. “Thank you.”

Karma shrugged, and then perked up again. “Stay there, I’ll be back.”

He placed Daichi back on his lap, and then darted out of the room before Nagisa could even say anything. Somehow, Nagisa didn’t even feel like questioning it, looking back over at his small pile of gifts instead. Also interested in the collection of tiny objects was Daichi, who lunged for whatever was closest to him, definitely making to grab it.

“Don’t put that in your mouth,” Nagisa sighed, already seeing it coming.

Daichi looked at him, but not like he really understood the instruction. He babbled something beyond comprehension, as he often did when directly spoken to, and then stuck out his arms. Not minding indulging him, Nagisa picked him up, letting him _essentially_ stand on his thigh (though Nagisa was holding most of his weight still). Apparently he was in an affectionate mood, because he wrapped his arms around Nagisa’s neck contently.

Karma returned, eventually. It took Nagisa a moment to realise he was actually already wearing his school uniform, which just reminded him that he would have to get up shortly. He was in a weird kind of mood where although there wasn’t much actually going on, time seemed to pass rapidly. Nagisa didn’t really want any of it to end, though.

“Breakfast in bed,” he shook the bottle of milk formula he was carrying.

“For Daichi maybe,” Nagisa half muttered, but he was smiling. 

Sitting down beside him, Karma passed the bottle over. “Maybe there’s a reason~,” he teased lightly.

That scared him, just a little. “A reason?”

Something in Karma’s demeanour changed, his face turning a little more serious. “We should talk.”

A spike of pure fear shot through Nagisa. Somehow, he just knew that those words meant potentially something bad. Immediately, he wracked his brain for any potential conversation topics, but it came up blank. He couldn’t even count the amount of times Karma had initiated a serious conversation on his hand, because it had _never_ happened.

Karma leaned across, poking him lightly in the arm. “Say, Nagisa, you look like you just saw Karasuma Sensei in his underpants.”

“O-oh.”

“I don’t even know why I was thinking about this,” he exhaled, “but it seemed like the right thing.” 

If Nagisa had a free hand, he would have reached out to reassure Karma or something. He couldn’t stand it when Karma didn’t automatically have the right words, or seemed unsure about something. Perhaps it wasn’t entirely fair to feel that way, but Nagisa was just so used to admiring Karma’s knowledge of just about anything, it was unsettling.  

“We should move somewhere.”

“H-huh?” Nagisa blinked. “ _Now_?”

“Well,” Karma reclined, “I think it makes sense. Your Mum’s going to have to return to work soon, anyway. I can’t say I don’t hate it, but Daichan will get bigger eventually. Plus,” he snorted, “it’s not like we can’t afford it.”

Nagisa’s throat went dry, like he couldn’t quite process the words Karma had just spoken to him. The idea of living somewhere alone with Karma sent his heart into near overdrive. It wasn’t good for the feelings he was trying his best to get over. On the other hand, he knew that sentiment was ridiculous, because literally sharing a tiny bed with Karma should be far worse than an entire apartment – presumably. Maybe _officially_ owning something together, putting a real label on it, scared him.

A part of him wanted to protest that they were too young to move out, but he tried to cut the thought off. They were too young for a _lot_ of things, yet they lived through them. And then there was another, slightly more selfish part of him that was just happy his family was going back to normal. Seeing his father back around so often… It had been all he’d ever wanted a few years ago. To simply just… leave all of that behind… Nagisa didn’t feel quite ready for it.

He knew Karma was right, though. It would have to happen _eventually_. Daichi was getting older, and as much as Nagisa dreaded it, would start wanting to move around and get into things more and as it stood there wasn’t really much room for it. A part of him didn’t see the permanency of this situation, he knew. It wasn’t just like he and Karma were having an extended sleep over, they had a _child_ and that was a life commitment.

“I- I need to think about this,” Nagisa got out.

“I know,” Karma said, entirely like he’d been expecting it. “It’s time for breakfast, anyway.”

Nagisa waited for Daichi to finish with his bottle, winding him properly before getting up himself. At least he seemed more settled. Karma pushed the door open for him, thankfully, as he had no free hands. Almost immediately, he stopped in his tracks.

His father was sitting at the table, sipping coffee. “So, he’s finally awake.”

“W-what’s this?”

The room was decorated, to an extent. By that, there was a small banner, and breakfast was already laid out. Nagisa blinked slowly, trying to comprehend what he was seeing. All of this, just for him? Perhaps he’d had something like this when he was a lot younger, if both parents were ever in the mood, but definitely not in recent years.

“I made breakfast,” his mother said, with a smile.

 _A smile_. Cautiously, almost like he was dreaming, Nagisa made his way over to the table. With Daichi clinging to him, seemingly in no hurry to stop, it was a little awkward to manoeuvre himself down. Everything about it just felt so warm and comfortable, and despite it definitely being a special occasion (Nagisa felt just a little bad about them wasting time on _him_ , to be honest), this was something he _craved_. Could he turn his back on that?

It was a good thing it was the last day of school, and their teacher wasn’t too concerned with proper lessons, because Nagisa was completely distracted. Even as people discussed their summer plans around him, he just nodded along, unable to relate too much to them. It just wouldn’t stop plaguing his mind, and internally he kept going round all the pros and cons.

“I honestly can’t believe you’re still doing homework on our last day,” Rin said, finding him in the library during lunch. As he often did, he sat himself down beside Nagisa. Though Nagisa couldn’t help but feel a little guilty, suspecting Rin somehow felt obligated to spend time with him, he did appreciate a little company.

“Oh,” Nagisa said, hiding the _actual_ pros and cons list he was writing, “force of habit I guess.”

He shrugged. “So, any summer plans? I heard all the first years were going out to celebrate surviving the first term, but that’s just word of mouth.”

“I thought about it,” Nagisa said, “but a few friends kind of invited themselves over to my house for my birthday, and I didn’t want to blow them off.”

Rin blinked. “It’s your birthday today?”

He hadn’t really found it important enough to mention, truthfully. “Y-yeah?”

“Nagisa kun!” He slammed his drink down on the desk. “Why didn’t you _tell_ me?”

The librarian glared at them both. “Both of you need to be quiet.”

Rin shot Nagisa a look. “Want to go somewhere else?”

He couldn’t help but hesitate. Really, Nagisa wasn’t exactly the loner type, at all. He _enjoyed_ spending time with his friends as much as he could, but he had other things to prioritise. Doing as much homework during his free hour of the day made sense, so that’s what he chose. At this point, it would seem a little weird to just show up to lunch like everyone else. But Rin was just asking him to hang out, presumably. It wouldn’t be so bad to spend time with his friend, considering he had a whole summer to write essays.

“Sure,” Nagisa said, shoving everything ungracefully into his bag.

Trusting Rin’s superior knowledge of the school campus, Nagisa trailed after him. He seemed confident enough in his strides, at least, that he’d likely already planned where he was going. They ended up outside of the building, not quite off the campus, but slightly edging on the sports field. Considering the heat of summer, thankfully Rin chose somewhere shaded to sit himself down.

“Cupcake?” He asked, pulling a mini cake out of his bento.

Nagisa looked at it. “I couldn’t.”

Unwrapping it, Rin placed it in Nagisa’s hand. “Sure you can. My Mum gives me one every day, so.”

“T-thanks.”

It was a pretty good cupcake, admittedly. Nagisa found himself savouring every tiny bite, licking his lips when he was done. He supposed it wasn’t too big a gesture that he should feel bad about accepting it, _really_ , but he was still grateful. So far, although Nagisa definitely got along with his classmates, when it came down to it he considered Rin his only _real_ friend.

“Say, Nagisa kun, we should hang out some time in the summer. If you’re free, that is.”

It depended on how he defined ‘free’. Unlike a lot of the others, Nagisa was hardly travelling anywhere – that sounded like a whole other _kind_ of nightmare. But, he had a five month old son who was quickly becoming aware enough of life to get bored without constant stimulation. Keeping him occupied, as well as general care taking, wasn’t particularly relaxing.

“Yeah,” he said anyway, “we should.”  

Lunch was over, shortly after that. Somehow, Nagisa felt a little better, thinking about something less heavy than his quickly impending future. The rest of the day went pretty quickly, with some final assignments being handed out before they were all dismissed. Nagisa tried his best to push his more troublesome thoughts cleanly to the back of his mind, instead focusing on the positives.

Perhaps, he thought when he actually got home, he’d thought that too early. The second he opened the door, he was bombarded. Of course, he was used to getting back to relative quiet after the chaos of the school day, so a group of teenagers right in his face was bound to make him jump just a little.

“Surprise!”

Nagisa stared blankly at the group. “I-I already knew you were coming.”

“Aw man,” Sugino rubbed the back of his neck. “I just wanted to say it.”

Limply, Kayano waved a miniature flag.

Nakamura slyly approached him and fiddled with his hair, before Nagisa had the chance to stop her. She didn’t do anything as potentially cruel as pulling out the ties, knowing how he felt about it, but he did feel a weight that wasn’t there before. Catching sight of himself in the mirror, he realised she’d placed a glittery tiara on his head.

“Nakamura san!” Nagisa complained.

She laughed, a hint of evil there. “Birthday princess~”

It had been so long since he’d seen some of them, especially all at once, that Nagisa couldn’t help but smile. Honestly, even if this was just three of his closest friends (plus Karma, who Nagisa didn’t feel right about putting in the same category), nothing could match the bond he shared with his old classmates.

Behind all of them, his mother cleared her throat. “Your father and I are leaving now. Are you sure you don’t want us to take Daichi?”

“I’m sure,” Nagisa said, without really thinking. He appreciated the offer, and he understood why his parents didn’t really want to hang out in a room full of teenagers, but as much as he could possibly manage, Daichi was _his_ responsibility. _Moving somewhere with Karma would properly fulfil that_ , a voice inside of him whispered.

Currently, Karma was holding him. Over time, Nagisa had realised Karma was more himself one on one, than in a large group. Not that Karma hated attention or anything, Nagisa’s best guess was he wasn’t as practised at being actively involved in such social situations, so he only spoke up now and then, when he had a reason to. Anyway, Nagisa came close enough for Daichi to clock onto his presence, and typically he began squirming, reaching out with his arms.

A part of him immensely enjoyed this. Sure there was crying, smiling, laughing, random babbling… But the gesture Daichi had recently learnt felt entirely different. A lot of things were still largely a guessing game, but this was genuine communication, clearly asking whoever it was to pick him up. It was an explicit request for something, the first of his life, and it made Nagisa’s heart swell up to the brim.

They ended up sitting in a sort of circle on the floor, generally catching up with each other. Nagisa appreciated that, rather than all of the attention being on him. He was glad to hear that everyone was getting on okay, now that the kind of initiation to high school period was over. It was both peaceful and casual. His parents had left money to order pizza, so they ended up with a small feast between them.

Once food was involved, it was only a matter of time before Daichi actually started complaining. Nagisa wasn’t sure whether it was genuine hunger or jealously or what, but it was becoming pretty common when there was food around him. Though, Nagisa wasn’t a hundred percent sure when babies even needed real food. He was only just _about_ five months old…

“I got it,” Karma said, noticing the displeasure in his expression, and began to stand up.

“Aw,” Kayano said, finishing her slice. “Poor Daichiisai.”

Sugino turned to her. “Eh? What’s that?”

She ignored the look Nagisa shot her. “It’s just a little nickname.”

“Daichiisai, huh?” Nakamura commented. “It suits him.”

“Y-you can’t call him that!” Nagisa protested, though nobody seemed to care. “You’re okay with this, Karma?!”

Karma shrugged. “I don’t know, it’s cute.”

“Isn’t that right, Dai…chii…sai,” Nakamura sounded out.

Annoyingly, Daichi turned his head towards her, presumably recognising the sound of his own name. He seemed to find this incredibly amusing, first breaking out into a wide grin, before giggling his little head off. It was _so_ good, in Daichi’s eyes apparently, that he looked straight at Nakamura and raised his arms. It surprised Nagisa a little, considering he’d only ever seen him do it towards his own mother and Karma before.  

“See,” she said, picking him up, “he loves it. Hey, why don’t you guys ever let me babysit?”

“Maybe I value my son’s wellbeing,” Karma said.

Once he was offered a bottle, Daichi seemed a little more content, if not sluggish. Nagisa supposed that was normal, after being exposed to so much social activity when he was used to mostly quiet evenings. Even when he eventually really did need to be put down for a nap, Nagisa realised he was having a really good time, just hanging out with his close friends.  

And he knew he could have this. He could have a life that was his and Karma’s, where they could have friends over whenever they wanted in their own space. It still felt dreamlike, and a lot of him had reservations. On the one hand, he was terrified that it would shoot him in the wrong direction, would strengthen his feelings for Karma _more_. On the other, more powerfully so, he wanted it.

“Did you have a good time?” Karma questioned, after everyone eventually said their goodbyes and they were left to clean up.

Something in him broke down, then. “Yes.”

“That’s g-“

“Let’s move out somewhere,” Nagisa cut in, feeling boldness spike up in him. “You’re right, I think it’s the best thing.”

As if Karma had expected him to end up saying that, he grinned slightly. “Tomorrow. Right now… There’s still a few hours of your birthday left. Want to watch some Sonic Ninja?”

Nagisa prayed he wouldn’t regret this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm gonna go out here and assume most of you will be very happy with these developments :D We needed a pause in the drama. 
> 
> As always, I highly appreciate all comments and feedback!


	46. Moving Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Karma and Nagisa go apartment hunting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is not #spon by Ikea

“Do you think we should get a sectional?”

On his list of conversations he never thought he’d be having with Karma, this came pretty high. The morning after his birthday, he’d woken up feeling a whole new kind of content happiness. Since they didn’t have anywhere to be, they were just hanging out on top of the bed, letting their conversation drift to the agreement they’d made.

Nagisa considered him. “Maybe we should choose a place first. It might not fit.”

He propped himself up on one elbow. “Then let’s do that.”

“N-now?”

“Sure,” Karma said nonchalantly. “Kunugigaoka’s not a huge town. I don’t know how many decent apartments there’ll be.”

Somehow, Nagisa knew he literally did mean ‘let’s go right this second’. So much for a relaxing day… Though, Nagisa was pretty sure you couldn’t just turn up outside places and demand to be shown around. Karma seemed confident, from the way he hopped up, that he knew what he was doing. Well, it _was_ his idea. Nagisa supposed it might just be one of those cases where he mostly followed along.

Leaving the house to go anywhere was a kind of _art_. It was a little different when Daichi was under a month old, where he was mostly happy to nap so long as he was clean and full. Now he showed full interest in his surroundings, and would start making a fuss if he was ignored for more than a couple of seconds. So, aside from the regular spare bottles and nappies and wipes (oh so many wipes), a change of clothes (you never knew what might happen), they also had to bring some kind of entertainment. And not just one thing, oh no – their son had the attention span of a _goldfish_ , multiple items to rotate.

Knowing the small size some apartments could get, it wasn’t worth taking a pram. If Daichi was in any kind of a mood to not cooperate with them, he wouldn’t be happy sitting in it anyway. Which meant he had to be carried, mostly by Karma because his arm strength was better suited to holding a baby for _that_ long, so there had to be a separate bag for all the emergency stuff, plus there was the matter of deciding what the best clothes to wear were because it was really hot around Tokyo and there had to be a balance of lightness without exposing too much of his skin to the sun and parenting was _stressful_ , okay?

“We’re just going out to the park,” Nagisa announced, when they finally were ready.

His mother didn’t pay too much attention. “Have a good time.”

If Karma questioned why he was lying, he didn’t show it on his face. In truth, Nagisa had no idea how to even begin to approach the subject with his parents, when he still had his own reservations. Perhaps, he thought deep down, it would be better to bring that kind of thing up when it was more than just an idea. On the other hand, he couldn’t just leave it until the morning they moved.

Despite a slightly sleepy baby clinging onto him, Karma kept the pace quite brisk, like he definitely knew where he was headed. Nagisa followed as close behind as he could, smaller legs struggling to keep up with Karma’s wide strides, round the seemingly random and winding streets. He had to blink when they finally stopped, trying to take in where they were. It was a housing agent.

“Oh,” Nagisa found himself saying, because of course that made sense.

“Well,” Karma said, taking another step forwards, “are you coming?”  

Nagisa wasn’t sure if this was the kind of thing you could just _show up_ to, but he went anyway. The interior of these offices looked absolutely clean and pristine, Nagisa was kind of frightened to touch anything, for fear of breaking it. It looked kind of like a ghost town, with nobody else present except the guy at the welcome desk.

“W-welcome,” the receptionist looked between them, like he was confused. “Are you waiting for somebody else, or?”

Karma flashed a cheery grin. “We’re renting an apartment.”

Eyes darting between them both, he coughed, and then pressed a button without saying anything else. Nagisa couldn’t help but flit his gaze on Karma, who still seemed pretty nonchalant about this whole thing. He swayed slightly as he stood, fixing his eyes on something across the room, Nagisa was almost tempted to follow it.

A woman came out, then, with a practically painted on smile. “Right this way.” She led them over to a small desk in the corner, and began frantically typing something. “So, what are you looking for?”

When Nagisa didn’t immediately say anything, Karma cleared his throat. “Three bedroom apartment, somewhere with a view.”

His heart fell into a metaphorical pit. Of _course_ they’d need a three bedroom place, because it would be weird to voluntarily sleep in the same bed. Because they were just friends. Friends who didn’t have feelings for each other. _Friends_. It would be good for him, really, to have his own space for clear thoughts. A life without the constant temptation to snuggle up to Karma felt like a fake reality, but not something he could pass up.

“Budget?”

“Unlimited.”

“ _Reasonable_.”

Karma looked at him with slight betrayal. “But-“

“I don’t need anywhere fancy,” Nagisa tried to remain firm, before Karma signed them up for a penthouse. He supposed it made sense, Karma (or his family at least) had always had money, so he was bound to have somewhat expensive tastes. Had he been suffering, in Nagisa’s shoebox of an apartment?

The agent typed something else. “Do you have any other requirements?”

Perhaps Nagisa really should have thought it through some more. He supposed that he’d be able to tell when he actually saw a place, but as it stood he didn’t even know what to look for. As long as it was big enough and had a roof, it was basically good enough. He was surprised that Karma didn’t appear to have any additional requests, though.

“I have an idea,” she said. “Is it… just for the two of you?”

“Three,” Karma pointed cheerily.

“Of course,” she hesitated again. “I can drive you to a nice place I think would suit you, for the low price it’s practically a steal.”

Nagisa, once again upon seeing her company car, couldn’t help but feel massively out of place. He paused for a moment, unsure of what to do. Making his mind up for him, apparently, Karma opened the car door, and handed Daichi over to him. They hadn’t really taken him in a car before, considering it was easy enough to walk or take the train somewhere, and they were too young to drive anywhere. Nagisa’s mother had driven him home from the hospital, and that was _it_. Just like that time, Nagisa decided the best way about it was to clutch Daichi tightly, not that he seemed to mind.

The place she began to slow down in front of looked okay, at least. The building looked like it was sturdy enough, which Nagisa guessed was meant to be important. It wasn’t too far from his current home at least, though it wasn’t exactly just around the corner either. Nagisa took a good long look at it, trying to picture himself living there. Then again, he was one of those people who could probably make it work just about anywhere.

Though the actual building wasn’t that tall, there were still a few flights of stairs before the floor they were being shown. Nagisa really wished he’d brought his notebook with him, it would have been handy to write everything down. Carrying a pram down so many stairs was bound to be annoying, but it was something they were both currently used to.

Finally they exited the stairwell, shuffling along to the end of a long hallway, before she found the door. A part of Nagisa was half expecting the door to swing open, and beams of glorious golden light to pour through. In reality, it was just plain walls and a wooden floor, but he still felt slightly taken aback, winded.

He gently kicked his shoes off in the entrance way, and stepped inside. This, his potential future home. The initial hall inside was littered with various doors, but it opened up so you could directly see that there was what looked like a pretty large balcony. Nagisa found his own feet carrying him further inside. To his left, there was a decent sized kitchen set up, and the rest of the space was empty.

Unable to stop himself, Nagisa gradually explored the rooms before him. On the right were two bedrooms of roughly the same size. The slightly larger one also had a door directly to the balcony, whilst the smaller one had a slight chunk taken out of it for the toilet. Unlike the cheaper apartment he lived in with his parents, this one had a separate room for the shower, and the bath came just off that. Since he didn’t know the price tag, Nagisa instantly worried that it was far too fancy, even if it was pretty bare bones.

The only room on the other side of the apartment, before the larger open space, was a much smaller bedroom, though it looked more suited to being an office of some description. All of the bedrooms were western style, which Nagisa saw as a good thing. Letting Daichi anywhere near something as fragile as tatami seemed like a recipe for disaster.

“What do you think?” He asked Karma, for some kind of assurance.

Really, Nagisa was happy with it. Although he knew they should probably look at others for at least an option rather than settling for the first place he saw. Nagisa didn’t need anything else, though. It was big enough for his needs. All he really cared about was the place not being totally trashed. Sure, it could use a bit of life, but it really wasn’t bad.

“All of this,” the estate agent said, “for only Y149,000 a month. The landlord is keen to get this place settled as soon as possible. You could even move in within the week.”

Karma narrowed his eyes, though likely not at the shockingly cheap price, but her word choice. “Why such a great deal?”

“Holiday coming up,” she said quickly. “They want it dealt with so they can have a stress free break.”

“Where?”

She matched him. “Hawaii.”

“I like it,” Nagisa interjected, before Karma got into a full blown argument.

Considering him, Karma backed down his stance. “We’ll take it, then.”

Just like that. Nagisa felt like he was going to get whiplash, by how quickly it was all happening. He’d been in turmoil about moving out just _yesterday_ , and then there they were, signing the lease for an apartment which, after they’d paid the deposit (thankfully they had practically bottomless bank accounts), was officially theirs to occupy, once everything went through.

Nagisa’s senses did tell him there wasn’t something quite right about everything, though. Deep down, he knew it wasn’t supposed to be that _simple_ , especially considering their age. But, at the same time, it seemed too good to pass up on. It played on his mind, though, even when they ended up in a fast food joint for some lunch.

“Are you gonna eat that?” Karma said, reaching over to take a handful of Nagisa’s chips before he could answer.

“W-we need to have a conversation with my parents,” Nagisa said, taking a sip from his strawberry milkshake. He’d consumed so much strawberry flavour whilst he was pregnant that he was honestly surprised he could still even stomach the stuff. Maybe he’d just developed a taste for it.

Karma took a bite of his burger. “You do the talking.”

_Damn it_. But Karma was right. Nagisa shouldn’t have the luxury of just stepping back. When they were done with their meal, he could tell Daichi starting to get grouchy too. There was only so much a baby could sleep through, and honestly he suspected carrying him around for much longer was not one of them. He had to remember that he was confident in this, that they couldn’t just live forever in Nagisa’s tiny bedroom.

“Welcome home,” his father called, seconds after they returned. “We’re making soba for dinner.”

Somehow, he was taken over by guilt, rather than pure apprehension. Despite everything, a selfish part of Nagisa still wanted to act like a child, to come how to his parents cooking every night. But that was a reality long gone. Though they’d only just got home, Karma gave him a certain kind of look that he read instantly. To make it worse, Karma took Daichi with the pretence of settling him down for a nap, which left Nagisa all alone.

He cleared his throat. “U-uhm, Mum, Dad…” He trailed off, not entirely sure of where to begin this conversation. “Can we talk? About something.”

“That’s not a happy face,” his father looked round at him. “Did something happen?”

“Y-you could say that-“

His mother cleared her throat. “The food’s ready.”

Perhaps it would be easier to do it, when they were all seated. Nagisa shot Karma a slightly helpless look of distress, but he didn’t appear to want to dive in and help. He could barely even concentrate on _eating_. Something that didn’t go amiss, though, was the heave of his chest lessening. Like a relaxant, something made him feel more at ease, all through his muscles. Sneaking a glance at Karma, Nagisa could only see concentration across his expression. _He was using calming pheromones_ , Nagisa realised.

“What did you have to say?” His father said eventually, after getting a taste of the noodles.

Right. “W-we were thinking,” Nagisa begun, because this needed to sound mutual. “Daichi’s getting a lot bigger, you know, I think he’ll pick up crawling soon! Anyway, with that into consideration, and Mum,” he addressed, “you’ll really have to return to work soon. We think it would be best if we moved out.“

Predictably, it wasn’t the best reaction. His mother’s gaze lowered, and his father spluttered on his food like he was dying. You couldn’t have cut the tension that suddenly formed. Nagisa’s eyes flitted from parent to parent, sweat beginning to form. There was no other noise, apart from Karma casually slurping his noodles up.

“ _Nagisa_ ,” his father begun, with a low and disciplinary tone. “You can’t-“

“It’s for the best,” he cut him off, moving into defence. “I- we, we’re so thankful for all of the help we’ve been given, but it can’t last forever. For everything you’ve done, I’m grateful, but with your blessing, this is what we’ve decided.” For good measure, he bowed his head as low as he could without face planting the table.  

His mother cleared her throat. “Okay.”

“Hiromi?!” His father let out.

She glanced at him. “Some things are in life are inevitable.” Returning her eyes to Nagisa, she sighed. “You… _both_ of you have handled parenthood surprisingly well. Better than many twice your age, actually. I’m proud of you, Nagisa.” How much had he yearned to hear those words? “You’ve also shown me that even if I don’t want it, I shouldn’t hold you back from what’s the best for you. I’ll support it.”

Nagisa was practically floored. It did make him feel a lot better, though, to know that he wasn’t something she was opposed to. Like a weight was lifted. Despite his father clearly not being as enthusiastic, Nagisa knew he’d come around, eventually. Karma slurped his noodles again, louder this time, and he knew it would be okay.

Now that everything was taken care of, they actually had to do the whole moving part. Taking a step into his frankly overcrowded bedroom, he wouldn’t even know where to _start_. Though they wouldn’t get the keys for another few days, he was on so much of a roll that he just wanted to sort through things. The items he did own surely wouldn’t be enough, he realised. Unless they wanted to sit on cardboard boxes.

“Karma…” He found himself saying when it was finally night, and he’d gotten lost in his thoughts over and over. “Did you think it was weird?”

“Huh?” Karma rolled over to face him, half obscured by the pillow. “What do you mean?”

Nagisa couldn’t let it go, then. “You asked her why it was so cheap, right? And she kind of dodged the question. It just… seems a little odd.”

Through half lidded eyes, Karma started randomly patting around, finally locating his phone. He didn’t say anything, so Nagisa leaned across, half resting on his chest. Karma didn’t seem to actually mind, typing in what looked like the address of their new place. Nagisa’s eyes struggled to adjust to the light in such a dark room, but he made out a few words.

He gulped. “D-did that just say _murder_?”

Karma tilted his chin up a little bit, clicking on one article. “Jilted lovers… stalker… both found dead in one of the rooms. Interesting.”

“Which room?”

Karma shrugged. “It doesn’t say.”

“We just bought a haunted apartment.”

He eyed him. “Aw, is Nagisa scared of _ghosts_?”

It had been a long day. So much had happened so quickly, Nagisa wasn’t sure he was up for Karma’s teasing. He didn’t know who in their right mind would be happy about living in a murder house, but as long as there wasn’t a corpse… Instead of putting up with it, Nagisa dove under the covers hiding his head. From their positions, this also meant he was face planting Karma’s chest, but that was just a minor. At least he let it go.

Afterwards, after the dawn of a new day, Nagisa really did discover the stress of moving. He decided against taking his bed or anything like that with him, not that his parents mentioned anything. A part of Nagisa still couldn’t face the finality of it. So, his bed and desk stayed. He was taking mostly everything else he owned, though. Going through his possessions caused a slight buzz to flow through him, like he really was excited. They’d have to buy most of the things they needed.

Which is how Nagisa found himself standing outside a kind of garishly blue building. The actual place had been Karma’s idea, which he instantly regretted it seemed once he realised that buying from there would require them actually building the furniture for themselves. But Nagisa felt better about buying relatively cheap furniture, where he could, so he was convinced.

“This place has a map,” Karma pointed out, upon entry.

Nagisa looked over at the dark blue floor plan. “That means we can get everything here, right?”

The shop provided tiny notebooks and pencils, which made Nagisa a little more excited than he wanted to admit. It made him feel like a terrible parent in a way, but looking at the scale of the store he was relieved they’d left Daichi back at home. As far as Nagisa could figure, his mother and father didn’t really mind, wanting to spend as much time as possible before they moved out.

The way the store was set up meant that they had to walk through a bunch of model rooms, which displayed all the available products in ‘realistic’ settings. Looking at how put together it was, Nagisa didn’t think realistic was a good enough description. Then again, he had no real passion for interior décor, or much artistic talent in general. Function over form, he thought.

Thankfully, but also surprisingly, they didn’t really argue too much about those items. It didn’t take long at all, for Nagisa to have the product numbers of a table and chairs, a book case, bedframes and mattresses, etc. (and yes, the sectional sofa Karma apparently wanted). By the end of their circuit, they probably had more things for Daichi in hand than anything else (because toys, Nagisa was realising, were a bit of a godsend).

Although it looked like the light at the end of the tunnel, the real ‘fun’ came when entering the market bit. Nagisa was simply overwhelmed by items he didn’t even know he needed. Once again, he let Karma lead the way, tugging him by the sleeve over to the crockery. They ended up going for the plainer stuff to get by, though there was so much he could hardly carry. At least as a start, he was certain they got the essentials.

And then Karma stopped, right in front of the rug section. “Let’s get this one.”

Nagisa was sure to a lot of people it was nice. It looked pretty intricate, dark shades of maroon weaved into a Persian styled pattern. But he couldn’t help but squint at it, somehow feeling a little nauseous. It just… wasn’t to his tastes. Plus, it would look a little ridiculous, considering how basic the rest of their purchases were.

He went with a slight tactic. “Karma, it’s eighty thousand yen.”

“So?” Karma tilted his head.

“I don’t think it counts as essential.”

Karma thumbed the material. “Sure it is.”

“ _How_?”

He shrugged. “It’ll look nice. Plus…” he looked up, like he was thinking of something. “Exposing babies to multiple cultures is important.”  

“Put it in _your_ room then,” Nagisa mumbled. “You can’t just use Daichi as an excu-“

“How’s that fair?” Karma argued back. “I pay for half of it.”

What exactly did Karma intend, to tape a line splitting their apartment in perfect halves? Nagisa didn’t voice that out loud, afraid that it would give Karma ideas. If he had the opportunity to freely decorate half the place without care, he was sure he’d end up somehow mortified.

“That doesn’t mean I want to have to look at it all the time!”

“ _Fine_.”

With that agreed, and carrying the slight monstrosity with them, they were left to the mercy of the warehouse. Half afraid that Karma would demand something in exchange for his compromise, Nagisa went as fast as he could, in an attempt at distraction. As more and more items were added to the large trolley they’d picked up along the way, Nagisa had no idea how they were going to get it all back with them.

The worker gave them a slightly odd look, glancing between them and the somewhat ridiculous amount of items they ended up checking out. With every item she scanned, Nagisa felt a little bit nauseous, wondering how he’d even physically managed to pick up so much. When it came to the final mug at the end, Nagisa’s breath caught, and then she announced the final total. Too extortionate it was beyond his comprehension. Though, he supposed it wasn’t that much considering how much money they really did have.

“Would you like home delivery?” She asked, once the massive sum had been split between their bank accounts.

Karma’s eyes flashed. “Absolutely,” he grinned at her.

Normally, Nagisa would complain that he was being lazy, but honestly he would have agreed to it too. Even filling out the address details and paying the extra cost, there was definitely some of that relief of not having to find some way to transport everything, given that the superstore was actually decently far away from Kunugigaoka.

“Thanks for shopping at Ikea!” She waved, when they finally left.

Though the bulk of it was now out for delivery, he still had to take the rest of his things. The best plan he had was going a single box at a time, despite how torturous it sounded to carry them that far, but mercifully his father offered to just drive him. His mother ended up tagging along too, but Nagisa found himself pretty happy about that. He supposed it was natural that they’d want to see the suitability of the place they’d chosen, for themselves.

“I’ll meet you there,” Karma said, decidedly not helping him carry any boxes.

Part of Nagisa automatically did believe that Karma was just trying to get out of physical labour, but it tugged at his thoughts. Karma… really didn’t have that much to pack, that Nagisa had seen. It made sense, considering their ridiculously extended and unofficial arrangement, that Karma had more things at his actual home. He tried to ignore the parts of him that felt bad about it.

Before it really registered with him, his parents had said their goodbyes, and Nagisa was all alone, in a strange apartment, and surrounded by cardboard. He was never _really_ alone, though, considering he had Daichi, but on occasion, when he was asleep (soothed by the car ride, no doubt), it was hard not to, even if it was kind of a welcome break from so much activity.

Once again, he didn’t really know where to begin. Milling everything over, he supposed he should get Daichi sorted out first. The more placated he was, the easier the rest of it was going to get. He was halfway through reassembling the crib, when Karma finally showed up. Inexplicably, with several boxes of his own, and only a single bead of sweat running down his forehead. Sometimes, Nagisa just didn’t even want to ask questions.

“Welcome home,” he said, for the first time, truly in an apartment of their own.

“I’m home,” Karma returned, wearing a smile that only held a hint of devilishness.

* * *

A rough kind of representation of their apartment, based loosely on a real place! 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just imagine they said 'okaeri' and 'tadaima' at the end. 
> 
> Just so you know, the next chapter gets wild, so be prepared for that. 
> 
> As always, comments and feedback are my main motivation!


	47. Heat Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a pre-warning that this chapter does get pretty sexually explicit. Not enough that I feel I have to up the rating yet, but just a heads up.

As the days went by, a few things were established. The first, and Karma’s favourite, was that Nagisa made breakfast. All around, it was convenient for him, since he couldn’t muster so much effort in the morning. Nagisa, to Karma’s disbelief, seemed to wake up with the sun. Given the opportunity, he’d happily snooze until lunch time, by which hour he got just a little too restless. So it was more of a late breakfast, and more like left overs than anything.

In exchange for that, and getting Daichi up for the first few hours, Karma took the night times. It wasn’t so bad, now that he was _basically_ sleeping through it, though he’d graduated to his own room. He tried his best not to mourn that, in the same way he tried not to mourn the walls that separated his and Nagisa’s beds.

At some point during the last few months, Karma had developed… _something_. Sleeping without the warmth of Nagisa right beside him wasn’t something he would have guessed would be difficult, yet he’d genuinely found himself feeling a little bit lonely at night. He didn’t have the luxury of dwelling on it for too long, though. On the plus side, he did appreciate the extra stretching room.

Typically, he ended up cooking dinner. Not that they really needed to eat the same meal or at the same time even, but it just kind of _happened_. Karma didn’t mind, anyway, he kind of enjoyed cooking- even more so now he had his spice collection again, so making an extra portion for Nagisa was hardly a chore. Maybe spending so much time with Nagisa’s family had indoctrinated him into the whole communal eating thing.

In addition to whatever routine they’d ended up forming, the furnishings of the place were pretty much complete, even after the inconvenience of putting most of it together. There weren’t really any decorations anywhere other than his own room (which was pretty dark, just the way he liked it), except from the class picture they’d stuck up, mainly so it wasn’t absolutely blank. Aside from that, they had a TV too (Nagisa and his love for movies hadn’t been hard to convince), which was exactly Karma’s plan for the day.

Or, at least, it _was_ his plan, until a child was dumped on his lap within five seconds. It almost took him aback, how suddenly it came upon him. Daichi blinked up at him, looking just as confused for a moment, before chewing on his own hand.  In question, Karma craned his neck around the back of the sofa, to find a kind of flustered Nagisa.

“I’m going to the bathroom,” Nagisa said shortly, and left just like that.

Karma _got_ it. Not that he minded, but Daichi had developed a bit of an attachment thing recently. He’d noticed it before, but now that they’d moved and there was nobody else to occupy him, he seemed to really hate it when he wasn’t getting whoever’s full attention span. Sure, it was a little tiring, to focus on one thing for so long. Something seemed off with Nagisa, though.

“Hey,” Karma said, bopping his nose. “What are you looking at?”

Daichi tilted his head up. “Kakakakaka,” he replied, and then went into some other kind of noise that couldn’t really be considered syllables.

He did his best to look interested in the baby nonsense, twisting a lock of the dark hair that was finally growing through around his finger. From their positioning (he’d worked out the math to minimise the glare on the TV screen), there was no real direct light shining on him, so Daichi’s hair appeared a kind of tinted dark brown. Outside, or so he’d noticed, it actually came off a kind of plum tone, though it wasn’t really thick enough for him to tell yet.

As the minutes went on, without Nagisa’s return, Karma couldn’t help but feel a little unsettled. A part of him almost wanted to get up and check, but he stopped himself. The likelihood was that he just wanted five minutes to himself, or something. Karma supposed he could allow him that, but any longer and he wouldn’t be able resit the teasing.

“You’ve been demanding, huh?” He questioned.

Like Daichi actually understood him, he starts tugging at Karma’s sleeve, with the hand covered in copious amounts of drool. Fortunately, he’d developed an immunity to bodily fluids. It didn’t seem like Daichi was tired, or in a particularly bad mood, though. _Huh_.

On some kind of cue, Nagisa remerged. Now Karma could actually get a good look at him, he was noticeably dishevelled. Nagisa didn’t say anything, plopping himself down on the other side of the sofa and staring at the wall. Since he apparently wasn’t going to engage in conversation, Karma didn’t either, and naturally began observing him.

He just kept shifting, and his body was tense. Like he just couldn’t relax. Probably ill, then, though Karma had no idea what with. He was thankful of the distance, at least. The shifting didn’t stop, eventually evolving into shivers. Karma was pretty sure it was that, considering the way Nagisa wrapped his arms around himself, which was a little ridiculous in the height of summer. If Karma had been just a little bit less bothered that day, he would have happily just sat around in his boxers.

“ _What_?” Nagisa snapped, eventually noticing Karma’s gaze.

 _That_ was pretty unlike him. Maybe he was going insane. “Nothing,” Karma shrugged.

Nagisa confirmed his suspicions, muttering something under his breath. If demeanour wasn’t already enough, he could actually scent traces of it in the air, when he concentrated. There was something else, too, but he couldn’t quite put his finger on it.

“They say talking to yourself is the first sign of madness,” Karma supplied.

If looks could kill, Karma would already be buried six feet under. “Leave me alone,” he said quietly.

So something was _up_. If Karma had been a better person, he would have just left it there, and recognised Nagisa probably just needed some time alone. Unfortunately, he was not a better person, and an urge to get to the bottom of it was ignited within him. Nagisa shifted once more, like he wanted to turn himself over and sleep.

They sat in relative silence, until Nagisa let out a noise that could only be described as a whimper, and he let his body fold in on itself. It was around then that Karma began to sense distress laced in his scent. He couldn’t stop his body from perking up with alert at that, mind racing with possibilities for what could actually be wrong. Nagisa seemed to sense it too, meeting his eyes for a moment, before turning them again onto the floor.

So Karma turned his attention back to Daichi, who was practically clamouring for it. Thankfully, at least _he_ was in a good enough mood, content to look at the flashing colours of whatever program he’d uncaringly flipped to when he entered. As long as Karma bounced him every now and then, to remind him he was still being looked after, Daichi was mostly settled, until he started getting tired and rubbing his eyes.

After sneaking a glance at Nagisa, who definitely wasn’t going to do anything about it, Karma bit the bullet, holding Daichi close to him so he could stand up. Stretching out his legs, Nagisa still looked indifferent, so he just went straight to the bedroom. It wasn’t anything much, just a crib and a chest of draws for clothes, with whatever toys they owned somewhat haphazardly located in the corner. Really, he didn’t particularly care, it wasn’t like Daichi would ever remember it.

Considering his son, Karma just knew he wasn’t tired enough to just fall straight asleep. Not that he had Nagisa’s practically supernatural sense of judgement, but Daichi was still squirming around. Trying his best not to do it too violently, he rocked him from side to side, hoping that would induce sleep. At least he stopped the kicking in the ribs he was previously receiving. Once he seemed docile, Karma figured ‘good enough’, and finally put him down.

“Yeah yeah,” he said, trying to ignore to slightly dejected look Daichi was shooting him. “Lights out time.”

He’d fall asleep, eventually. At least with a plain room, there was nothing else really to keep him occupied. Karma sighed and closed the door, one problem taken care of. His next was still sitting on the sofa, rolled up like a woodlouse. He didn’t get why Nagisa wouldn’t just tell him he was sick or something, it’s not like Karma would _care_ (much).

“Nagisa-“

There was that glare again. Nagisa rose to his feet, and lumbered over to his bedroom like his feet were made of lead. He closed the door hard, too, as if he was trying to make a point out of doing so. Karma was pretty sure _he_ hadn’t done anything to anger him, surprisingly. Even if he had, Nagisa didn’t usually react in such a way. That look, it was the same one he gave a target before he was about to slit their throat.

He considered going after him, but then again, why _should_ he? If Nagisa wanted to be a big baby, then, well, Karma had the place to himself practically. No need to go back to his own bedroom. He ended up sticking his head in anyway, to grab one of the books he was meant to read. It really wasn’t anything he didn’t already know, so he ended up paying more attention to the One Piece reruns playing in the background.

So it probably wasn’t the most constructive use of his newfound free time, but no other ideas really came to him, that he wouldn’t be forced to clean up later. Well, relaxing was fine too. He didn’t get a lot of time for that recently. Daichi would probably be even harder to keep occupied after resting up, so really he was just getting his couple of hours in.

Nagisa tentatively emerged from his bedroom, after a while, still as sluggish as before. “I-Something doesn’t _feel_ right.”

His blood began to run like red hot lava. It was like somebody had just opened the best bakery ever, right in their apartment. The exact scent wasn’t something he could put his fingers on, fruity and sugary and _oh so intoxicating_. It didn’t matter, he wanted to sink his teeth into it. Legs moved against his will, and he got closer to the source.

“K-karma?” Nagisa practically trembled. “What-“

Right there and then, Karma totally lost it. Tunnel vision switched on, and all he could see was _omega_. The closer he got, the more it overtook him, inviting him in to take a bite. He moved until there was no more space between them, trapping Nagisa against the wall with both arms planting him there. Eyes flicking down to the direct source, the tantalising swell of his scent glands, Karma couldn’t resist digging in, wrapping his lips around the area and _sucking_.

Nagisa instantly keened under the attention as his gland was stimulated, his scent getting even better now he was so obviously pleased. With the mix of sweat on burning skin and the sweetness of his scent, it was like licking salted caramel. And Karma couldn’t _stop_. Of course, pressed so close with aroused omega filling his senses, he felt himself harden too, but it was more of an afterthought. His top priority was licking a trail up Nagisa’s throat, savouring his taste.

Slowly, he worked his way up, until he met Nagisa’s earlobe. He ended up sucking on it, dragging his teeth along the flesh. This rewarded him with a kind of broken noise, something he’d like to keep and replay _forever_. Almost reluctantly, he pulled back, looking Nagisa right in the eyes. Aside from the clear, burning desire swimming in his pupils, Nagisa looked _wrecked_ already. He was panting, cheeks about the same colour as Karma’s own hair, sweat sliding down his forehead…

More. He needed _more_. That time, he went for the other side of his neck, peppering increasingly intense kisses down his path until he met the other gland. Vaguely, he became aware of his hips moving of their own accord, desperately searching for friction, but he didn’t really register if they made their mark. He also faintly noticed Nagisa wrap his around his back as he sucked, clutching onto him.

“M-mark me,” Nagisa practically whined. “ _Alpha_ , please, bite-“

Karma felt his gum swell up around his upper canines, in preparation to do just that. It was all his body wanted to do, recognising Nagisa as a compatible omega. Feeling like it was the exact right course of action, he let his sharpened tooth scrape against the gland, teasing the omega who practically became putty. He would bite his mark, claiming Nagisa for himself and bonding them together until one of them died.

Somehow, like a miracle, a wave of logic came over him. Nagisa would never so shamelessly _beg_ for him like that. No chance in all the plains of hell. As quickly as he could, finding it almost painful, he separated them, taking a huge stride back. Nagisa looked up at him in confusion and hurt, and it almost snapped his heart in two.

“You’re in heat,” Karma choked out, recognising it now for what it was. “Or close enough to it.”

Pure unbridled fear flashed in Nagisa’s eyes. “I-“

“Go,” Karma practically commanded, motioning for his bedroom. “I can’t-“

“Please stay!” Nagisa reached out for his arm, looking completely and utterly panicked. “You don’t have to do anything but don’t leave me alone!”

Karma _couldn’t_. A few more minutes with Nagisa like that, and he wouldn’t be able to resist ploughing into him on whatever surface was closest. He didn’t even think Nagisa was in full heat yet, considering he had the ability to form sentences, but Karma had never been close to an omega like that before. They needed protection and comfort, though, didn’t they?

He tried his best to concentrate, ignoring the pheromones swirling around the air. “Go back inside and close the door,” he said as steadily as he could. “I’ll stay right beside it, over here. Okay?”

Nagisa nodded weakly, making his escape behind the safety of his door, and Karma sunk pathetically down the wall. The worst and most intense of it was gone, but the real torture was how his scent lingered. Karma had _never_ come so close to losing complete and total control of himself before. That had been too close, _dangerous_.

At least he managed to ignore his own arousal. As much as he considered _doing something about it_ , lowering his inhibitions even more would only make it worse, and he was pretty sure a bunch of alpha sex pheromones would make the heat worse, too. The panic and the weight of the situation he’d almost gotten himself into helped kill it, at least, allowing him to think at least somewhat neutrally. He was as loose as he could be with his scent, letting it seep under the doorway so at least Nagisa knew he was there.

Just like that, time seemed to pass both fast and slow. It dragged, but Karma’s mind was so full that hours passed with every blink. Even with the door closed, the scent gradually increased, becoming stronger and richer. He’d never been so thankful before when he eventually heard Daichi wake up again, so at least he’d have something to _do_. Judging the timing of it, it would probably his last nap of the day, and then Karma really wouldn’t know what to do with himself.

He wasn’t sure how much leaving would disturb Nagisa in that _state_. Remembering the desperation in his eyes, he didn’t want to risk it. Figuring it was the best he could do, Karma stripped off his t shirt, pressing it against the door. It would have to be good enough. To make matters slightly worse, Daichi did not seem to be in the best of moods, bursting into tears the second he walked into the room.

“Ouch,” Karma said aloud, but Daichi didn’t let up. “Come on, it’s not like I _ignored_ you.”

Daichi just cried some more, so he essentially gave up. By process of elimination, he was _probably_ just hungry, but Karma changed him anyway, a challenge when all Daichi seemingly wanted to do was roll around and kick him. Karma didn’t sign up for this. At least the bottle shut him up. Not that Karma _wanted_ him to be silent and placid, but he was already, not that he’d admit it, in over his head.

“Here’s how it’s gonna work,” he addressed, setting him down close to the sofa. “I’m sitting right here, you’re going to stay there, here’s a teddy.”

He didn’t look particularly impressed with that arrangement. Not that Karma supposed he was capable of understanding the concept of authority yet, but it was never too early to learn. He sighed, going back to whatever he was doing before. Moping by Nagisa’s bedroom door, that was. Again, probably not the most constructive use of his time, but he didn’t know what else to do.

Daichi got bored of the one toy supplied to him, after exactly four minutes and two seconds, unfortunately. Not in a particular mood to deal with the consequences of that, he raked his eyes around for something else. There were still a couple of boxes they hadn’t completely unpacked yet… It would probably be fine, under supervision.

“Go nuts,” he said, fetching one before sinking back to the floor again.

Immediately entertained by items that weren’t toys, Daichi began sifting through it, and Karma let his mind wander. He couldn’t let himself get too far gone, for fear what might happen if that scent was stronger, and he was less in control of himself. Actually, looking his child in the eye was basically the best abstinence reminder he could _get_. No way was he dealing with another one of Daichi. He’d be completely overpowered. And then Karma blinked, really looking, and then he noticed the object he was chewing on, namely, his old knife from 3 E.

Well. He knew from experience those knives weren’t dangerous to normal humans. Anti-sensei material was pretty tough, he knew Daichi wouldn’t be able to gum any of it of off. After the initial spark of concern, he realised he didn’t have much of a problem with it. If anything, it was an ideal material to chew on. Nagisa might have had a different opinion, but well, he wasn’t exactly able to _voice_ it.

Karma padded around for his phone, sliding the camera app open. What? It was adorable. No use trying to get Daichi to smile for him, lest he drop the knife, but the concentrated expression was just as good. He considered sending it to the group chat, ‘ _assassin in training’_ , but it would probably cause Nagisa to _actually_ murder him.

“Alright,” he said eventually, “hand over the weapon.”

Blankly, Daichi blinked up at him, and continued to chew on the knife.

Karma sighed, actually moving over to him. “ _Daichan_ ~”

He practically wrestled it out of Daichi’s mouth, which Daichi found hilarious apparently, surprisingly keeping an impressive grip. That was probably the _right_ thing to do. Karma returned to his previous position, wiping the knife off on his sleeve before tossing it up in the air, easily catching it by its handle. It amused him for a while, at least.

At the feel of something suddenly pressing on his thigh, Karma jolted. Right beside him, somehow, Daichi was trying to get his attention, about two meters away from where Karma had placed him. Which meant either he’d teleported somehow, or he’d moved on his own. _Huh_. That was new. Karma supposed he needed to keep more of an eye on him, then.

He ended up playing with him properly until it really was bed time, which he had no problem with. If anything, it really did make everything else bearable, until he had to be put down for the night. Ordinarily, he’d relax after that, but he found himself returning to Nagisa’s door, like a soldier who couldn’t leave his post. It wasn’t the most comfortable of positions, so sleep didn’t come easily to him.

After some point, it definitely turned into full blown heat. Even with the distance Karma had forced between them, he suppressed every single instinct he had, tried as hard as he could to not fall into a rut. It was damn near _impossible_. Just to get some kind of release, he practically bit his own arm to shreds, teeth needing to latch onto something. He couldn’t imagine how bad it must be, to actually be in a heat.

He stood up, and pounded on the door. “Nagisa, I…” Karma suppressed the growl he so badly wanted to let out. “I’m leaving water outside. I’ll be in my room for ten minutes, so take it before I come back.”

This was survival.

* * *

 

Nagisa had never felt like this, like he could just combust at any moment. His skin was containing his body and it was irritating him. Fire burned and rushed through every single vein. He wasn’t even sure what day it was, how long had passed, or where he even _was_ , other than his own personal hell. The memory of how he even got there was blurred, though somehow he was naked (probably ripped the clothes from his body in frustration), and there was a shirt and a bottle of water beside him. He tried to drink some of it down, to quell and cool him, but it just made him feel sick, desire taking over.

Desire to be touched. He’d tried that already. Most of the burn was in his lower zones, and once it had become more prominent than the pain, there was nothing he could really do to resist it. Even after wrapping his hand around his apparently permanently hardened length, tugging rapidly until his body eventually shuddered and released, there was no real relief. It had barely even taken the edge off, resulting in a sore and tired wrist.

So this was heat.

A part of him knew where the need really lay. To the core, what heat was… It was a biological need. Even as out of it as he was, Nagisa hesitated, tried his best to hold off on anything too humiliating. His body, however, completely wet from the sweat and the slick pouring out of him, just gave in. Too tired after a point, Nagisa ended up giving in, letting the heat fully take over.

It wasn’t enough. He lay on his side, gingerly shoving a finger in and out of himself with little finesse. When it failed to fulfil him, he added a second, which cooled the burn just a little. He didn’t feel much of anything, no capacity for pain or any real pleasure, but that didn’t seem to matter. His body was somewhat satiated, but not completely satisfied.

As he naturally half rutted against the sheets, desperation building, he was thankful for the steady stream of alpha pheromones. Had his body not been completely weakened, he would have got up and followed it to the source, but it was good enough. It kept Nagisa from panicking in his vulnerable state, at least. He wasn’t alone. At his other side, he had the shirt… filled with kind of old but still intense alpha pheromones. He pressed it to his nose, inhaling the scent with a whimper.

The thought infected him and for the first time in his life, Nagisa wished he remembered that night between them. It was absurd, but it was the only experience he had to go off, even if all he recalled was standing in the kitchen, and then suddenly waking up next to Karma in a bathtub with a sore ass the next morning. Of course the result had made itself obvious, but other than that, nothing.

So he pictured that his fingers weren’t his own, that instead of suffering as he was he had his alpha there with him. It didn’t matter, right then, how much he inherently knew it was wrong to think of Karma in that way. He shoved his fingers deeper, knowing that Karma probably wasn’t the type to go easy or gentle. That was fine by him, with the way his body was currently reacting, the harder the better.

Then again, in a situation like this, when Nagisa wanted him so badly… Karma was too devious, too sadistic to just pound him like he wanted. This heat was already torture, but he’d find a way to torture him more, and a sick part of Nagisa would probably enjoy it. Groaning into his pillow, he sped up his motions, spreading his legs open a little more.

He moved up to three fingers, which barely even fit and probably stung like hell, but he didn’t _care_. Even in preheat, he’d been pretty out of it, but Karma _had_ touched him, a little. Almost seeing white at the memory of Karma’s lips on him, his _scent gland_ of all places (the thought of sharp teeth scraping against it sent Nagisa to a whole other plane of existence), and the weight of his body trapping him against the wall, he was almost completely lost to the world.

There was another need brimming inside him at that thought, something his body just knew. Of course, rubbing up against him, Nagisa was pretty certain Karma had been hard, he’d _felt_ it, but there was something else. In his madness, he curled up his fingers inside, mimicking the one thing his body really was craving – a knot. Just like that, finally, a wave of relief came over his entire body, making him cloudy and breathless.

Nagisa winced as he pulled his fingers out, trying to catch his breath, though even the exhaustion was far better than the torment. But, then, just a minute or so later, it came upon him just as strong. There was nothing he could to hold it off, except do his best to give his body what he wanted. He was getting worn down, and fast. To the point, soon enough, where he couldn’t even move, sobbing his pain into the sheets.

By the time it really was over, Nagisa didn’t really have a sense of himself. Broken beyond his limits and out of tears, he stared up at the ceiling. Despite it being plain and white, imaginary blurs seemed to dance across his vision. A, perhaps stupid, part of him couldn’t stand to just lie like that, after everything. He felt dirty and _wrecked_. So he leapt up, doing his best to hobble over to the door on shaky legs.

“Oh,” Karma jumped back at the sight of him, like he’d been leaning against the door and had quickly gone to his feet or something. “You-“

Nagisa stumbled upon seeing him, falling into him. Thankfully, Karma’s honed reaction speed came to his rescue, and he apparently decided to move and catch Nagisa, rather than dodge out of the way like he so easily could have. Like he was some kind of tether, Nagisa hung onto him, feeling just a tiny bit saner.

He looked at him for a second. “You’re naked-“

At that point, Nagisa didn’t even _care_. He wasn’t entirely sure how to voice anything anymore. “B-bath.” His dried slick was clinging uncomfortably to his legs, for one.

“It’s boring when you’re totally defenceless,” Karma muttered, and then moved quickly, sweeping Nagisa off his feet into what was basically the bridal carry. “Otherwise this would be prime blackmail.”

“I’m sorry,” Nagisa said into his neck, burying his head there. “Uhm, Daichi-“

He didn’t hesitate in his reply. “Asleep already. We had fun and all.”

“Fun?”

Karma didn’t respond to him, just stepping forward and carrying him into the bathroom. He almost protested, when Karma gently lowered him into the tub and turned on the tap. It felt kind of unnatural and gross to take a bath without showering first, but Nagisa probably couldn’t have stood up long enough anyway.

Surprisingly, Karma averted his eyes once it was full enough. “You good?”

Nagisa really didn’t want him to leave, but he nodded anyway. At the sound of the door closing, Karma leaving him all alone, he felt a very strong twinge of sadness. The water was nice against his skin, though, relaxing all the muscles that he tensed up. He didn’t stay in there for long, scrubbing as much as he could manage, and then drawing his knees up to hug them.

He just about got steady on his feet again, draining the water out of the tub as he did so. After stumbling over to the towels, Nagisa slowly patted himself dry, wincing at the feel of it on his tender skin. At least he did feel better, though, to be clean and at least somewhat fresh. Once he was a little bit happier, he caught his reflection.

Naturally, his hair had fallen out of its ties after everything, but that wasn’t his main concern. _No_. When he brushed some of the strands away from his neck, it was clearly lined with bruises. Some of them weren’t so bad, but others were _dark_. And Nagisa knew _exactly_ how they got there. Worse still, the darkest were concentrated around his scent gland, right on top of it! It wasn’t quite a bonding bite, but it was _close_. Karma had _marked_ him.

Nagisa was going to scream.

“Karma!” He rushed out, dropping the towel in his anger. “What were you-“

Taking one look at him, Karma instantly looked up, staring intensely at the ceiling. “What did I do?”

Noticing where he was standing, right next to the open door, Nagisa swallowed. “W-why were you in my room?”

Karma met his eye again, though definitely locking his gaze right there, and had the nerve to smirk, holding up the shirt, currently coated in something Nagisa prayed was drool rather than slick, but both were equally embarrassing. “I mean, I got the whole nest thing ages ago. It made sense, like, you were having _my_ baby after all. But _this_? You got a kink for my scent or something?”

This couldn’t be happening. No way was Nagisa admitting that. “What are _these_?” He hissed, deflecting it back to the original purpose.

Apparently having regained his head, Karma came closer, as if to inspect the bites for himself. “Well, you shouldn’t have _begged_ me for them.” When Nagisa tensed, he exhaled. “Relax, I know it’s just an alpha thing, not a me thing. Ha, your _face_! Go clean your room yourself, then. And put some clothes on.”

Nagisa practically raced back into his bedroom, slamming the door closed behind him to mute out Karma’s chuckles. And the worst part? If his body worked normally, it would only be three months or so until he had to go through this all over again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *sighs at Karma* Yes, sweetie, you *did* sign up for this, when you begged Nagisa to let you keep the baby... Remember that drama?
> 
> See, told you it was wild. I'm also not posting this at 4am today, which is why you have actual chapter notes. Woah look at me go. 
> 
> Also, Daichi has purple hair because I couldn't decide when I invented him, said it for a joke, and that's just kind of how I picture him so there we go. In a universe where Nagisa's hair colour is natural and an octopus can be a teacher, their son can have purple hair. At least I didn't give him Todoroki Shotou syndrome (though Karma is a Todoroki confirmed after last chapter, passive aggressively slurping soba...) 
> 
> Poor Nagisa thinks his first time might have been anything worth fantasising about. He should read this fic's prequel... 
> 
> Anyway ramble over. Please comment any feedback etc. as usual, I do love it! 
> 
> じゃね~


	48. Growing Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nagisa recovers from his heat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> they almost talk in this one...

Batting an almost six month old’s curious hands away from his hair was not what Nagisa would consider the best way to spend the morning. Usually, he wouldn’t mind a little tug here and there, but Daichi had been getting considerably stronger lately, and actually kind of hurt when he decided to yank with the force of his entire body. It wasn’t often that much of an issue unless he was carrying Daichi over his shoulder, because his hair was out of reach. And _why_ was it an issue that day?

It was completely Karma’s fault, no matter what he claimed. The bite marks surrounding Nagisa’s throat had just barely faded. He still had a litany of red spots and bruises, clearly visible, even though it was already approaching the end of the summer break. They had better go soon, because there was no way Nagisa could show up to school like that. Or in public in general. Even at home, his hair was down, because weighing out his options it was the less embarrassing one.

Nagisa still hated wearing his hair down. Shame and reminder of his other’s old tendencies aside, it simply got in the way. He felt like he was constantly pushing it out of his face, but it was better than exposing the marks. At least Karma hadn’t taken the opportunity to make fun of him for it yet. In fact, they hadn’t really spoken at all unless necessary, since his heat. It didn’t help that Nagisa could barely look him in the eye.

On the one hand, Nagisa was kind of enjoying the peace and quiet. On the other, he was quickly becoming kind of bored. Stir crazy, almost. Again, that was mostly Karma’s fault, but he’d also been recovering his energy. Though, he wasn’t really in much of a hurry to go out anywhere. Despite being able to logically accept that it wasn’t his fault exactly, Nagisa still felt bad for leaving Daichi for what was essentially three days. He didn’t seem particularly bothered, but he still felt like he should make it up to him.

“What do you want for dinner?” Karma said, and Nagisa automatically flinched at his return.

So maybe the avoiding had been his doing. Despite it all, he wasn’t actually mad at Karma. If anything, Nagisa owed him a lot. He knew that if things had panned out just a little differently, it would have been a lot worse than just some bruises, and then he definitely _wouldn’t_ be able to talk to Karma ever again. So, he was very grateful he clearly had more sense.

"I'm not that hungry right now," Nagisa said, knowing that he couldn't really blow him off with no reply. "I don't know."

Karma quirked his head a little. "Rice then."

"Plain rice?" Nagisa found himself turning to him properly. He wasn't exactly a fussy eater and he knew he hadn't specified anything, but it seemed a bit depressing. He'd basically been living off plain rice anyway since his heat, as the only thing he could stomach after the upset it caused to his insides.

"I'm tired," he excused. "You can make something _better_ yourself.”

Not sure how much he believed Karma, but aware that he had no real right to complain, Nagisa shrugged it off. He hardly felt like cooking some sort of grandiose meal either. It felt like there was something on the tip of his tongue, but Nagisa couldn't form real words to express himself. He hated that effect, but he hadn't really learnt how to handle it yet.

“I’ll throw in some chicken,” he said eventually. “Just because I’m _nice_.”

Nagisa had a few retorts for that, but he actually _was_ nice, so he didn’t say anything.

Finally realising Karma was there, perhaps, Daichi blinked and thrust out his arms. It was still the only kind of meaningful communication he had, except perhaps Nagisa could count how he'd keep moving his fist around his mouth when hungry or rubbing his eyes when tired. He was definitely getting somewhere, though, demonstrated by his nonsensical drabble.

"Papapapapapa," he said, so at least it was discernible sounds rather than pure noise.

Karma took a step back, eyes widening like he'd seen a ghost. "Woah."

"What's wrong?" Nagisa asked a little wearily, because Karma wasn't often stunned to silence.

"You mean you didn't hear that?" He reached down, picking Daichi up into a tight hold. "Look at you go, huh? And I was your first word!"

Nagisa blinked. "Word? What word?" Had there been words? Daichi was a bit too young for real speaking, wasn't he? Not that Nagisa really knew, but he didn't think they did it that young. It was rare that he could even hold a stream of syllables for that long.

"He's clearly saying 'Papa'," Karma replied, though he didn't seem particularly worried about explaining himself to Nagisa. "Isn't that right, Daichan? Can you say it again? Pa...pa," he sounded out slowly.

Daichi giggled and squirmed, repeating his mumbled attempts at the 'word' even more. Then again, why wouldn't he, if he thought he was going to get a reaction? Nagisa was highly sceptical, considering how tiny he was. He almost expected better from Karma, who was undoubtedly intelligent enough to see mindless baby talk for what it was.

"See," Karma pointed out. "He's doing it."

Nagisa wasn't sure if he should tell him. "I-I'm not sure he's doing that on purpose. It's probably just a fluke-"

"Don't be so negative~" Karma poked him in the cheek. "Don't listen to him, hey, Daichan. Your Mama doesn't want to be proud of you."

"Mama?!" Nagisa spluttered, jumping off the sofa. "Don't encourage something like that!"

Karma cocked his head. "Why? You gave birth to him."

Flush rose up on his cheeks. "Yeah, but, it's so _girly_."

He shrugged. "Let Daichi decide then."

' _But he's a baby'_ , is what Nagisa wanted to say. He kept himself in check, though, not wanting it to turn into an actual argument. There wasn't a lot he could really do to change Karma's mind on this, but he supposed it was okay. He'd just have to count Daichi's _actual_ first word at a later point, in a few months when he had the capacity to actually know what he was saying.

Karma took him into the kitchen area like that, presumably to start cooking the food. Well, as long as he was careful (which Nagisa trusted he would be). Whenever Nagisa made breakfast, he usually ended up doing it with Daichi in his arms too. Now that he'd started moving around on his own (he'd noticed it a couple of days ago, how Daichi seemed to drag himself forwards on his forearms), Nagisa was a little concerned about leaving him on the floor where he could speed off easily. At least he seemed interested by everything in there.

Somehow, Nagisa found his feet moving towards them, though he could plainly see what they were doing from where he was sat before. It was basically the easiest meal in existence to make, involving basic measuring before throwing everything in the rice cooker. Karma sighed after he'd done it, presumably bored by the waiting time. Not bored, however, was Daichi, who was fixating on everything Karma was doing.

"Do you think we should give him normal food soon?" Nagisa's brain supplied, before he could really think about it. It was one of those things that he'd considered briefly before, though he wasn't sure why it had slipped out right then.

Karma looked a little unsure. "I don't think he really needs it."

But he would someday. A part of Nagisa wanted Daichi to stay a helpless newborn forever, which was perhaps contributing to why he so wanted to be certain that he hadn't meant to say anything that sounded like a word. He'd never really thought of himself to be the type that would be remorseful about that kind of thing, but he was starting to realise that those days weren't going to come back. Though he was still definitely small, Daichi would never be _that_ small again. But Nagisa still loved him exactly the same amount as he had holding him in his arms for the first time, a fact that took him by surprise sometimes in its intensity.

"I think it's better to get him used to it," he found himself defending. "When he really _does_ really need it."

"If you want to try it," Karma shrugged, pulling a spoon out of the drawer with one hand.

They quietly agreed not to give him anything too hot, in case it burnt his gums. Eating that evening, Nagisa kept a close eye on him. Daichi really did seem to be watching them, and the food now entering their mouths. He could have sworn, even, that he was mimicking their eating, gumming on his own hand.

With no objections after they were done, a spare, tiny portion made its way into a bowl. Though it had been his suggestion, Nagisa wasn’t sure exactly how to do this. Daichi was just so small and fragile, Nagisa was sure he’d choke or something. With that thought in mind, Nagisa ignored Karma’s questioning look as he mixed normal formula milk in. It made the concoction look kind of gross, if he were honest, but at least the taste would be what he was used to.

Apparently neither of them had had the forethought that Daichi would _eventually_ need a high chair or something along that lines, which meant that right then, they didn’t have a lot of options. A look of horror came across Karma’s face, when he realised the position he’d left himself in. He didn’t actually complain, though, tugging Daichi onto his lap. Nagisa would just have to do his best not to spill anything. 

Daichi looked a little perplexed at an actual loaded spoon coming towards him. Thankfully, to create that expression, he’d opened his mouth a little, which gave Nagisa his opportunity.  Though he didn’t quite force it, he pressed the spoon against his mouth. Surprisingly, after only a second or two of confusion, he seemed to get it, closing his lips around it. He continued to look a little wary at the new texture, before visibly swallowing.  

“I’m glad you like rice,” Karma commented softly. “Otherwise your life was about to get _real_ difficult.”

In reply, Daichi smiled widely, as if to request more. Now he knew he definitely didn’t _hate_ it, Nagisa was a little more confident with the next spoonful. Daichi just took to it, as if this wasn’t the first experience he was having with food or cutlery. Nagisa hadn’t exactly intended to give him the whole bowl, but they reached the bottom pretty soon. In fact, Daichi seemed to pout, when the next spoon didn’t come. At least he hadn’t actually caused that much mess, only a small amount of it making its way to his chin.

It was the best that could have gone. When it came to clearing up, Nagisa felt that spike of remorse once again. Though it wasn’t as if he was suddenly already completely grown up, Daichi was definitely taking the steps towards it. First the (kind of) crawling, and then eating real food (Nagisa refused to count the supposed talking). He didn’t know how to feel. In a way, it was bitter sweet.

By the time Nagisa returned from the blind spot which was the kitchen, Daichi had been lowered back to the floor again, and was apparently finding a stray hair tie to his interest, though Karma was nowhere to be seen. For a moment, Nagisa just stood there and watched him, love overwhelming his heart. Then, like most objects, it ended up in his mouth, which meant Nagisa really had to keep a close eye. Daichi had it between his gums, experimenting with pulling the tie forwards and backwards with his thumb. Unfortunately, he tugged a little too vigorously, and that was the moment Daichi discovered the concept of elasticity.

The moment the band hit against his chin, Daichi’s eyes widened in shock, before he started to wail. Although it couldn’t really be worse than a slight sting, Nagisa still felt immediately awful about him being in pain. He instantly went to pick him up, as if that would help a little bit. Though Nagisa did know this was only temporary, and probably wouldn’t discourage him from exploring things he probably shouldn’t.

“You’re okay,” he hushed, holding Daichi flush against him as he sobbed into his shoulder. It took a little bit of manoeuvring, but he got a hand free to stroke the back of his head. When that didn’t really work, Nagisa allowed himself to observe the right moment before lightly applying pressure underneath his chin. Slowly, he sensed the chaotic waves of his consciousness relax, and the cries died down into just sniffling.

It was only a few seconds more before Daichi was taking advantage of his position to play with Nagisa’s hair again, but in that case Nagisa didn’t really find it. Perhaps Daichi was just tired, too, because he didn’t bounce back to high spirits straight away. By the looks of things, it was actually probably time for bed. Somehow, Nagisa was feeling the same exhaustion.

Before he could just put Daichi to bed, though, Karma came back out again. Despite the light mood of earlier, he seemed a little more serious. Immediately, Nagisa wished for the ground to swallow him again. After the whole heat fiasco he’d finally felt less on edge, but there Karma so effortlessly brought it back. Nagisa swallowed, not wanting to engage in it so directly.

He found himself walking over to his own bedroom, though in some kind of bold move, he left the door wide open. Taking a deep breath, he let himself collapse onto the bed, Daichi slotting in beside him. Nagisa closed his own eyes, on the cusp of sleep, though it wasn’t long until the mattress shifted.

“ _Nagisa_ ,” Karma said, though it wasn’t cruel sounding.

Knowing he couldn’t avoid it forever, Nagisa let his eyes flutter open. Karma was staring at him, meeting his eyes with _focus_. So he clearly had something to say. But Nagisa was almost afraid of what it could be. He found himself holding Daichi, who had fallen straight asleep, a little closer, like some kind of comfort.

Nagisa swallowed. “We should talk.”

“Mmm.”

But a kind of panic took over him. Maybe just because it had been a little while since they’d laid together like that (he was almost disgusted by the way his heart fluttered), but Nagisa was frightened of the atmosphere. It wasn’t the type he could easily duck out of. Not the type he was ready to accept yet. He wasn’t sure if it was okay to feel like that, like he shouldn’t drag the depths of his feelings out in the open.

So he changed the subject. “We have to do something about Daichi soon. Now my Mum would have returned to work.”

“Oh,” Karma blinked, a little taken aback, before rolling over to stare at the ceiling. “What were you thinking?”

It was one of those things that had just been in the back of his mind. “Some kind of nursery or care centre or something maybe.”

Karma looked over at Daichi’s sleeping form. “I don’t know. He’s still so small.”

“People have to do that kind of thing though,” Nagisa justified. “I think they’d take him at that age.”

“But what if he gets _hurt_?”

Though it wasn’t like they were sending him off to war or anything, Nagisa felt the same. It had practically broken his heart to see Daichi in just a small amount pain just then, so Nagisa didn’t know what he’d do if he ended up with scrapes and bruises and the rest. There was also the idea of leaving him in the care of someone he didn’t even know, no matter how qualified they might be.

“I think it would be good for him,” Nagisa reasoned aloud, finally. Perhaps it was a bit of an oversight, but he didn’t think Daichi had ever really been put next to a baby of his own age. He wasn’t sure how much they even really needed to socialise at so young, but it felt like a good thing.”

Apparently it wasn’t an argument Karma felt “We’ll look then. But it had better be somewhere that takes bribes.”

“Just what are you planning?!”

“G’night Nagisa.”

A little bit worried at that prospect, Nagisa looked over at his relaxed expression. “Why would you want to leave him in a place that accepts bribing?! Isn’t that unsafe-“

“Simple. Easy way to get a nanny costume. Remember the maid outfit that one time? I think we’re due a repeat.”

He knew exactly what that meant. Nagisa turned away from him, flush dancing on his cheeks. “N-nannies aren’t the same as maids anyway!”

“Sure,” Karma dismissed.

He closed his eyes again without telling Karma to leave.

* * *

 

**Fan art**

[A really adorable strawberry Daichi by Miyoko Miru](https://mobile.twitter.com/Miyoko_Miru/status/1027910615291969536?s19)

[And Karma being dangerous with the baby, also by Miyoko Miru](https://mobile.twitter.com/Miyoko_Miru/status/1027925754858729472)

These arts are honestly so adorable and I'm super happy to share them with you! Please give the original some love whilst I die over these! 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little shorter than the last one, but hey we all needed a breather! 
> 
> I hope you all enjoyed! 
> 
> As always, please leave comments and feedback!


	49. Tea Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nagisa hangs out with his classmates

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this just made me real thirsty

“ _Nagisa_ _kun_.”

Nagisa whipped his head around at being poked, letting his muscles relax from their tense, defensive state. It wasn’t like him, to get so caught up in studying. They’d only been back at school for a short while, and whilst he was still adjusting to it, everything had seemed to speed along so quickly. Without him really realising, it was almost midterms.

He blinked, looking back at his classmate. “O-oh, sorry.”

Higashi, the girl who sat beside him, rolled her eyes. “You’re really in your own head, huh?”

“I’m focusing on study hall,” Nagisa defended.  

She cleared her throat, as if she was about to make a declaration. “You’re coming out with us later.”

Eyes darting around, Nagisa realised he was surrounded. The classmates that sat around him were looking at him with varying levels of intrigue. Like if he said no, they’d end up dragging him with them anyway. Sure, Nagisa could probably make an excuse and get out of it if he really had to, if it were do or die, but he knew when to pick his battles.

“Okay,” he surrendered. “I just need to send a text-“

“Oh, I see,” Minami leant forwards from behind him. “So you just have crazy parents?”

Nagisa panicked. “No! I’m not texting them.”

But he wished he had just stuck to that. It would have been a really good excuse. Pretending like it was simply his parents being strict, and therefore not letting him see anybody socially, would have been completely plausible. Thankfully, though, they didn’t actually press him about who he was texting. Nagisa did it under the desk, just to be sure.

 

A weight was lifted from his shoulders, though Nagisa still felt guilty about passing off his parental duties. He knew he could make it up, though. It had actually been pretty hard to find any kind of child care that took them in so young, considering most (including that place they’d fixed up the year before) ran from ages two and above. Which meant they had exactly _one_ option, in the entirety of Kunugigaoka. They’d been _ridiculously_ lucky to even get a place.

“Yeah,” he said, just as the final bell sounded out. “I can come.”

“Great” Nishi, the boy who sat at his other side, wrapped an arm around his shoulders. “We’re getting bubble tea.”

Nagisa didn’t particularly care for bubble tea, but it probably wasn’t the _worst_ way to spend his time. He tried his best to nod along with their conversation over to the shoe lockers, but they were talking about a memory, rather than anything from popular culture. It made Nagisa’s heart sink a little, when he couldn’t follow it, though he knew it was entirely his own fault.

As it turned out, the place they were taking him to wasn’t that far from school. In the opposite direction from the train station, sure, but Nagisa supposed he wouldn’t be back _too_ late. Somehow, he felt as though he was being watched, like they were half expecting him to make a break for it. That theory was confirmed, when he was very purposely pushed into the middle of the group, once they entered the small shop.

Since he wasn’t particularly fussy, Nagisa just went for the basic cold brew tea, though chose strawberry bubbles in the heat of the moment. Perhaps he never was going to get over the strawberry thing. He followed his classmates over to the corner of the shop, where they’d claimed the biggest table.

“Come,” Nishi said, “you can sit here.”

“Thanks,” Nagisa replied, and took a sip. The tea was nothing special, but the strawberry burst in his mouth shortly after with sweetness. The conversation between everyone picked up, which gave him time to slowly sip it and listen in.

“So,” Higashi leaned forwards after a while, “what we really want to know is if you’re _actually_ in the Yakuza?”

Nagisa choked on his tea. “E-excuse me?”

“Oh my god,” Nishi wacked her arm. “You can’t just ask him that!”

He looked between all their curious faces. “Y-you asked me here to find out if I was in the… Yakuza….?”

“Well,” Minami said, “it’s not like we haven’t been trying to get you to hang out with us for _months_ now, but yeah, kind of.”

Nagisa swallowed. “Why do you even think tha-“

“We have quite a lot of evidence, actually,” Higashi pulled a sizeable book out of her school bag, and slammed it on the table. “I don’t like making blind accusations. So.” She stared at him, like this was definitely supposed to be an interrogation. “We’ve only ever seen you in class. The second it’s over, you bolt, like there’s something you have to get back for. Whenever there’s a break, or a weekend, you’re _always_ busy.”

He wasn’t entirely sure how to react to that. “Y-you think I’m some sort of crime lord because of that?”

“Of _course_ not,” she sighed. “An underling, maybe. I mean, it’s not just that. Everyone agrees you’re kind of mysterious Nagisa kun, no offense, and some things just don’t quite add up. Nobody has ever seen you shirtless, so you could easily be covering tattoos. Your _demeanour_. You always seem to have money. Plus you’re, like, one of the best in PE, and…” She trailed off.

“She means you don’t look like you should be,” Kita finished for her, brushing her dark hair out of her eyes.

Nagisa _understood_ it. Part of him was still convinced he was going to grow at least some time soon, but at the moment he was small and skinny. He knew that was supposed to be normal for an omega, no matter how hard he trained with anything it would be hard to build up much visible muscle. All of that meant that with his assassin training, his athletic abilities might seem a little out of place.

But Nagisa wasn’t at liberty to tell them the truth. Lest he get in serious trouble with the government, potentially, he couldn’t tell anybody what happened in the last year. The rest of it, that was just his own decision. It wasn’t that he was particularly ashamed of anything, but it had been so long without bringing Daichi up, it would probably be worse now he’d known them for so long.

“I’m not taking part in any organised crime,” Nagisa finally settled on. “So you don’t have to worry.”

Higashi’s eyes widened. “But-“

Kita glared at her. “It’s done now.”

“I just take studying seriously,” Nagisa explained. “And I don’t have any tattoos.”

“Oh,” Nishi shrugged. “Well, that was fun.”

“But my research!” Higashi complained.

Nagisa looked at her, admittedly, well maintained notebook. It seemed like she’d actually put quite a lot of effort into her notes. Perhaps they had that in common. Nagisa remembered how fun his surveillance of Korosensei had been. At first he’d just done it out of necessity, figuring that maybe it would be a good idea to record everything they knew about their teacher. But at some point, though, Nagisa had come to think of it as a hobby. He _enjoyed_ scouting for information.

“There’s some pretty solid evidence here,” he smiled. “Nine out of ten times, this would all have definitely added up to me being in the Yakuza.” Finally, Nagisa looked between them all. “Uhm, i-is this some kind of rumour going around?”

Kita leant back in her chair. “Yup,” she punctuated with a pop.

Great, so _everyone_ thought he was part of some kind of gang? Maybe that explained why some people seemed a bit wary of him, so he hadn’t been _imagining_ it. In a sense, it was kind of hilarious. Nagisa had never had much of a _reputation_ before, so this was all new. Ironic, really, considering his true personality. Assassination maybe, but he wasn’t a _criminal_. He wasn’t sure how to feel about it.

“I’ll hang out with you more often,” Nagisa promised. “At least, during school hours.”

Minami blinked. “So you _do_ have really sucky parents?”

“Not really,” he responded automatically. “I don’t even live with them anymore.”

 _Damnit_. The interest that comment peaked wasn’t ideal. Nagisa wanted to crawl away and hide, at their unwavering stares. Thankfully luck was on his side, because that was the moment his phone began to vibrate. His eyes flit down to it, Karma’s contact showing up on screen. Considering Karma _never_ called him, he was instantly worried. 

“Who’s that?” Higashi asked.

“My roommate,” Nagisa panicked, and then pressed to answer. “What’s wrong?”

“Hey Nagisa,” Karma’s voice came over the other end. “The hostage situation can’t be too bad.”

Nagisa bit his lip. “It’s not so bad.”

“Anyway, question- Where did you put that washing thing?”

Honestly, Nagisa didn’t even know what he was talking about, but something else stuck out. “What for?”

There was a pause at the other end of the line. “I need ammonia.”

“ _Why_?”

 Karma laughed casually. “Just a small juice stain.”

“Juice?” Nagisa questioned. “Why did you even _have_ juice?” 

“…He didn’t want to drink the water as it was.”

It took him a moment to process what Karma meant by that. “You gave Daichi _juice_?”

“Relax Nagisa,” he remained casual. “It’s not like I gave him a bottle of rat poison.”

“Karma! Do you even know how much sugar’s in that stuff?”

“It was fine! I mean, until it landed up all over the place.”

And then Nagisa remembered that this conversation wasn’t happening in isolation. Something had briefly come over him, making him forget the series of eyes now trained upon him. The full conversation would have been hard enough to explain on its own, but hearing only half of it probably would seem pretty strange. By the looks of things, Nagisa had already spent enough time out.

“I’m coming back now,” he said, making it definitely not an offer but a fact.

Karma definitely hesitated, like he was about to tell Nagisa not to. “See you,” he said in the end, and the line went dead. Perfect.

Swallowing, Nagisa shoved his phone in his pocket. “Sorry guys, I should probably go.”

Higashi’s eyes followed him, as he stood up. “What was that about?”

“I don’t really know yet,” he answered, “and I’m not sure that I want to. Uhm,” he looked them all over, “I had a lot of fun.”

“Hey, you’ll come with us again sometime, right?” Nishi said.

Nagisa left with a smile plastered across his face. Aside from spending mutual time with Rin during lunch, it had been so long since he’d been involved in a normal conversation. Well, normal enough, if the Yakuza accusations were discounted. Even when with one of his old classmates, the conversation managed to flit to something child related.

There were worst problems to have, though, he thought as he made his way to the train station. He could never view looking after Daichi as any kind of chore, even if he was currently worried after Karma’s call. He supposed nothing could have been too wrong, considering how level Karma’s voice was. He couldn’t tell as easily through a phone call, but Nagisa still was very good at reading his thoughts.

By the time he actually got home, a whole number of bad things could have realistically happened. However, when he opened the door and took his shoes off on autopilot, there didn’t seem to be much chaos. Nagisa peered around the wall, looking into part of the kitchen area. No sign of anybody. Thankfully, though, before he had to start searching every room, Karma’s head popped up from the sofa.

“Yo,” he greeted, and went back to whatever he was doing.                                                                                            

Nagisa stepped forwards tentatively. There didn’t appear to be much of a mess at all, really. In fact, the more he looked, the more creepily _spotless_ everything seemed. Either Karma had just been messing with him, or there was something shady going on. Somehow, Nagisa decided that he didn’t want to dwell too much on it, if there was nothing to worry about.

“I’m home,” Nagisa said out of habit. “Did you solve the juice problem?”

“Hmm?”  Karma looked up, with slightly tinted cheeks. “Oh, yeah. I shouldn’t have called you,” he mumbled.

Looking over, Nagisa saw Daichi in his own little world, sitting in the high chair they‘d finally bought him, eating a banana. Well, by the looks of things, he wasn’t really _eating_ it per say, more playing with it. Apparently, he’d discovered that mashing it with his fists made the fruit an interesting texture. Nagisa knew that he shouldn’t be really concerned, since they were still feeding him the formula regularly. At least it was entertainment.

After a few seconds, Daichi noticed him, and started banging his tray with renewed vigour. He hadn’t quite said another word yet (Nagisa still wasn’t convinced he’d been saying ‘Papa’ at all, though he supposed he had been repeating the syllables a lot), but not for lack of trying. Nagisa was almost surprised he was so lively, considering he didn’t have the (kind of) luxury of napping whenever he felt like it anymore.

Once he was done… punching in excitement, he stuck his arms out, asking for a hold. Thankfully, Nagisa had become kind of numb to messes, barely even flinching when Daichi wrapped his arms around his neck and nuzzled into him. He still wasn’t particularly happy about cold mush being rubbed into his skin, though.

“You need a bath,” Nagisa sighed. He, too, was going to need a bath.

Daichi just giggled, and rubbed his cheek into the crook of Nagisa’s neck again. Even though he’d only been gone an hour or so longer than usual, he felt a twinge of what felt like homesickness. It didn’t make that much sense when he broke it down, but it was a lot harder to leave Daichi at a nursery rather than just with his mother, especially after the summer break. He knew he’d get over it, eventually.

“At least you can add banana to your list,” Karma commented, standing properly beside him then. For reference, Nagisa had been noting down exactly what foods he liked and didn’t. Fortunately, so far, he seemed to just be a fan of food In general. How much of it actually ended up in his mouth, however, was another question.

Now that Daichi could hold himself up pretty solidly, they definitely didn’t both need to bath him, but Karma made like he was going to help anyway. Considering his lazy personality in most things, it never seemed to apply when it came to Daichi. Nagisa wasn’t even sure if it was a conscious thing or not, but it was the same for him. Hard work, yes, but the last thing Daichi was was a _burden_.

If Nagisa could have paused his life right there and then, he would have.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nagisa Is Not In The Yakuza 
> 
> The Yakuza is like, the Japanese mafia, if anybody doesn't know what that is.


	50. Festival Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The annual Kunugigaoka school festival rolls around again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote 4k words today. Daichi cuteness level over 9000.

“Alright Daichan,” Karma said, “time to go.”

Daichi didn’t seem particularly keen on going anywhere, right then. He was far more fascinated with… Karma had to do a double take, not entirely sure _what_ he was playing with. On closer inspection, it turned out to be the TV remote. He hadn’t quite managed to turn the box on, but he was making his best effort to press all the buttons.

Of course, Karma would have let him stay there if he could, since he knew he wouldn’t miss anything _too_ important if he happened to skip school that day. But then Nagisa would scold him, and it just wasn’t worth it. So Karma just sighed, and bent down to take the remote out of Daichi’s hand. His son looked up at him in betrayal, when Karma’s tug outmatched his own strength, and tears began to stream down his face. 

“Sorry,” Karma tried. “But you’ll get over it.”

He continued to sob a little, but it didn’t turn into full blown crying. Karma swung his bag over his shoulder, and picked Daichi up with his other arm. Thankfully, he seemed to forget his upset pretty quickly, and didn’t try to put up a fight. Karma considered that a positive, because the less he freaked out at this point, the better.

Sure, it made the most logistical sense, but he’d totally got the short end of the stick. Nagisa got the happy, excited reunion, where Karma got the whining of separation. It wasn’t so bad at first, but in the last few weeks Daichi seemed to actually notice he was gone. He wasn’t ever really that clingy otherwise, annoyingly. Karma knew he wasn’t exactly neglected, but it still sucked.

At least Daichi was probably a little too young to remember where they were going, just from walking there. Nursery wasn’t particularly far thankfully. In fact, Daichi remained pretty subdued as they entered the building, but he knew he wouldn’t last for long. Considering he had to leave pretty early for school, it didn’t help that they were one of the first ones there. Well, better to get it over with.

“Papapa,” Daichi whined the minute he was put down, shaking his head back and forth and reaching his arms out.

Karma felt his heart breaking, so he crouched down to attempt reason. “C’mon Daichan. Toughen up a little, huh?”

He didn’t seem to like that idea. Recently he seemed to be getting the whole ‘shaking your head means something negative’ thing, and Daichi hadn’t stopped doing it. Karma sighed, knowing that they couldn’t really drag this out any longer. One of the members of staff shot him a sympathetic look, and Karma just _hated_ sympathetic looks.

“Are you gonna say bye?” He tried.

Daichi shook his head again and whimpered, even if he didn’t really know what Karma was saying to him. With nothing else to do, he stood back up again, straightening, and tried his best to ignore the whining sobs as he turned away. Ordinarily, he wouldn’t be so affected by something like that, but it made him feel awful. He just had to hope Daichi would get over it in a few minutes.

Like usual nowadays, he was the last one to class. Not that Karma was ever desperate to be the first there, but apparently he’d walked in on some kind of discussion. Looking at the time, he was only a minute late for actual lessons, though they seemed to be pretty into it. Whatever it was, didn’t sound that interesting or worth his time, so he just went straight over to his desk.

“Akabane,” Asano acknowledged.

Karma forced a casual smile on his face. “Mornin, Asano kun.”

He swung round, looking Karma in the eye. “We’re discussing our final roles for the school festival tomorrow.”

That sounded boring. Sure, the last one had been okay, since he’d been in direct war with Class 3A, it was interesting. Not that he’d been the most involved even then, he and Nagisa had been _fighting_ and he really hadn’t been able to bring himself to care that much about something so trivial. With absolutely nothing than the honour of Class 1-1 to protect (which he didn’t care about really), he wasn’t motivated.  

Asano cleared his throat. “Since Akabane has nothing to add, all positions are final.” He glared at him, then. “The only role left is a greeter. I trust you won’t drive our customers away.”

Shrugging, Karma leant back. He probably had better things to do, like study, but it wouldn’t be the worst. If Asano really wanted to win the best booth, then it would be a good chance to mess with him. Of course he was most definitely planning something, that much was clear, or else he wouldn’t have made any kind of big deal about it. Karma might… _strongly_ dislike the guy, but he did respect his intelligence.

Nothing else was said in regards to the festival for the rest of the day. The final exams would be coming up shortly, and although once again there were no massive stakes this time, Karma felt a kind of determined focus. He would most definitely aim to beat Asano indisputably. It would hold more weight, perhaps, given that this time they were studying in exactly the same circumstances. So there wasn’t much time to waste on stupid things like festivals.

Of course, like he often did, Karma forgot all about it when he got home. It was empty as always when he got there, considering how much closer his school was compared to Nagisa’s, but he’d found an appreciation for that. At least there would be just a few minutes for him to clear his head, after the _headache_ that was having Asano exist in the seat next to him all day.

He perked up when he heard the door begin to open, though. As good as silence could make him feel sometimes, he always preferred his brain to be busy, on the move. Also, he just kind of missed Nagisa after spending so long amongst idiots. Daichi too, of course, but with a grand vocabulary of one word you couldn’t quite hold a conversation in the same way.

“Welcome,” he played off his minor excitement.

Nagisa’s smile glowed, as it so often did. He slipped his shoes off carefully, a far happier looking Daichi in his arms. It made Karma’s vision blur at the edges, surrounding Nagisa’s form. A lump formed in his throat, and all he wanted to do right then was pace up and _hold_ him. But he couldn’t. Somehow, he was no longer afraid of Nagisa himself, but the way he made him _feel_.

“Karma?” Nagisa said, in front of him by that point. “You look-“

He forced himself to drag his eyes to the ground. Karma had been experiencing some pretty weird things recently, when it came to Nagisa. Sure, he’d accepted that it was normal to want exactly what he couldn’t have. And he _really_ couldn’t have Nagisa, that much was obvious. As full of shit as Asano was, Karma was pretty good at judging a lie. ‘ _We’re not lovers and we never will be’_. It would be a lot easier, he figured, if Nagisa was truly unavailable, rather than the fleeting knowledge it was just a bad idea.

It was actually Daichi who interrupted Nagisa’s speech and his own train of thought. He made a noise that didn’t particularly resemble speech, lunging out for Karma with his arms. Well, at least he’d forgiven his earlier betrayal. Karma accepted him into his own hold, feeling slightly more whole when Daichi happily squealed and wrapped his arms around his neck.  

That was right. This was what was truly important. The pressure of the strings tugging his heart, common whenever he was in the same space as Nagisa recently, lessened immediately. Apparently it was visibly obvious, because Nagisa didn’t try to continue with his question. Although he was still sure that Daichi liked to be held, he was getting increasingly more restless, and started squirming like he wanted to be put down within a few seconds. Karma sighed, not wanting to fight him on it, and Daichi was off like a rocket.

Nagisa smiled after him. “He was doing that when I picked him up too.”

He hadn’t bothered to learn proper crawling still, more than content to just drag himself along the floor. Karma supposed it was whatever, as long as he was getting places. Sometimes Karma would put him down and he’d be the other side of the room in a blink. He wasn’t entirely sure how, but Daichi had a pretty impressive amount of natural stealth. Whether to be proud or somewhat concerned by that, however, was a different matter.

“Outsmarted by our son?” Karma asked teasingly. “I thought you were the number one assassin.”

“I’m tired,” Nagisa complained. “They’ve really been ramping up the lesson difficulties.”

Karma wasn’t sure if it was as hardcore as Kunugigaoka’s exam preparations. Then again, Keisetsu was a pretty exam heavy school. At least Nagisa didn’t have to suffer with any big festivals. He _definitely_ wasn’t looking forward to it, even if it was just a few days of his life. Right then, he almost regretted not finding out exactly what Asano was planning.

“We need to go shopping,” Nagisa said, nonchalantly walking over to the fridge. “Unless you feel like instant ramen again.”

Part of him hated instant ramen, but the lazy voice inside him said that food was food and he was totally fine living off the stuff. He stretched, following Nagisa over to the kitchen. He was right, upon inspection, there really wasn’t a lot. They tended to buy food and other supplies out of necessity, not routine.

Karma sighed. “ _Real_ ramen sounds good.”

“Tomorrow morning?”

And then he remembered. “I can’t. I have that festival for the next few days.”

Nagisa looked at him in question. “I’m surprised Kunugigaoka are even holding something like that.”

He had a point. After everything with Korosensei came out, the school had noticeably been keeping a low profile. The media circus was only just beginning to die down, with the doors to the school very much being closed to the public. The annual festival was practically _famous_ , in this part of Japan. By hosting it so brazenly, they were practically inviting the media back in again. Well, perhaps money and tradition were more important than reputation.

Though, he didn’t have much to verbally say about it, so he shrugged instead. “Let’s just order food in.”

Nagisa chewed his lip. “Isn’t that kind of a cop out?”

“Not if you’re hungry.”

“Fine,” Nagisa said, grabbing a soda from the fridge and moving over to the sofa, where he sat himself down and started scrolling through his phone, presumably looking for places that did delivery. “I have to study biology anyway.”

Karma joined him. “ _Huh_? And how’s your biology?”

He made a sour face. “You know that science is my worst subject.”

“Want some help?” It was a semi serious offer. Though science wasn’t necessarily his favourite subject, he never really struggled with any of the facts. “I could test you or something… Hmm, what’s mitochondria?”

Nagisa’s expression creased with confusion. “The…powerhouse of the cell?”

“Well-“

“ _I don’t know_ ,” he complained. “I’m not studying anything like that anyway.”

Karma felt a real kind of determination to help him then. And, surprisingly, not because of the pleasure that would come with undermining and humiliating his intelligence. He supposed there was nothing wrong with assisting Nagisa in study, in fact it was probably the opposite of wrong. It just made sense, considering it was likely he’d have at least an idea about the subject.

“So what _are_ you studying?”

His eyes raked over to the wall slightly. “ _Gestation_ ,” he mumbled lowly.  

He paused a second to take that in, before laughter rose. “You should know more about that already than anybody.”

“It’s really technical!” Nagisa’s voice rose a pitch in complaint. “And I didn’t really pay attention to any of the science stuff. I just kind of wanted Daichi to be born already back then, and I don’t think that’s going to help me answer questions about mono whatever antibodies!”

Was that… a trace of sass Karma was detecting?

“Monoclonal,” he found himself correcting.

Nagisa made a noise of exasperation, and that’s when Karma felt a slight movement press down on one of the sofa cushions, right beside his leg. He looked over, noticing tiny hands pressed there, Daichi’s head peering up over the top. Of course, he supposed they hadn’t really paid much attention to his whereabouts, it was only a matter of time before he got bored.

“Hi Daich-,” Nagisa said, his stress apparently fading just like that, before cutting himself off.

Karma was confused as to what had distracted him, when he noticed the significance. In order to be in that position, Daichi had definitely pulled himself up, using the cushions to support his weight as he stood. Sure, they’d held him up with his feet on the floor before, but never like this, practically up on his own. Daichi didn’t seem fussed about it, like he’d been doing this for weeks already. Well, at least that explained how he’d found the TV remote earlier.

In all honestly, Nagisa looked a little more spooked about it than Karma was. Almost as if he didn’t know what to say. Before he could, though, he heard the unmistakable sound of their door buzzer, which meant the food Nagisa must have ordered had arrived. When Nagisa didn’t immediately move, Karma scooted forwards, picking Daichi up with him as he stood. At the swift movement of being swept into the air, Daichi giggled, no complaints about being removed from his standing position.

He looked curiously at what turned out to be a pizza guy, though undoubtably recognised the smell of food. Well, it _was_ better than instant ramen. Again. Karma gave him the money, and transported the pizzas straight over to the sofa again. Thankfully Nagisa was hungry enough to forget his shock, which meant they didn’t have to eat in awkward silence.

Unfortunately, however, Nagisa had forgotten one very important detail regarding their son. The thing was, Daichi did eat well. He had a couple of teeth now and once he’d been introduced into the idea of flavour, all he seemed to want to _do_ was eat. So, it was kind of hard to have any kind of food in front of him, leaving him out, without upset. Pizza was great, but probably not something they should be feeding to an eight month old.

That didn’t stop Daichi from crying, when he figured out he wasn’t going to be getting anything. Karma thought about it quickly, and tore the crust from his own slice. He figured it probably wasn’t that different to regular bread, which they’d already introduced him to. It wasn’t as bad as all the cheese and sauces, anyway. Thankfully, Daichi was immediately pacified when Karma handed it to him, keeping him propped up on his lap.

“You think it’s alright to give him that?” Nagisa asked tentatively.

He examined the way Daichi’s face broke into a smile as he chewed off a little. “He seems fine.”

The rest of the evening passed without much issue. Daichi managed to finish a decent amount of the pizza crust, after which his tiredness became obvious. As usual, they gave him a quick bath, before putting him to bed. A positive about the nursery is that it seemed to tire him out a fair bit in comparison to the full weekends they had him. He was straight to sleep, and Nagisa had even forgotten about his biology problems.

The new day brought new issues, though. Not only did he have to go to school on what was technically a weekend, but he had to spend all day with Asano, his mindless friends, and the rest of the boring class. It wasn’t exactly a thought that had him leaping out of bed. His absence could be used for one thing, though. Nagisa seemed to take huge personal issue with any time he left Karma alone with Daichi, though Karma could tell it wasn’t out of mistrust, but some kind of guilt. It got on his nerves, only so many times he could physically say the words ‘I don’t mind’, so any opportunity to let Nagisa ‘make it even’, or so to speak, was a good one.

At least, that’s what he told himself. Karma convinced himself it was worth it because that was the only way he had any motivation at all to _not_ skip. That motivation almost immediately vanished when he arrived at school, to be greeted by Asano’s dumb, smug face. It sent a storm of rage through his body, but he kept his cool.

“Good to see you have the troops out already,” Karma gestured the preparations for the ‘booth’. Unlike last year, it was just a pretty small tent, rather than the concert thing he’d tried to pull off. “What happened, lose all your pop idol friends?”

He scowled, a little. “Anything too flashy wasn’t approved. So, we’ll be targeting a different demographic. Not the masses, no, something more exclusive, luxurious, more expensive.”

Resisting the temptation to roll his eyes, Karma did notice a glint of something. This wasn’t just Asano trying to be extortionate, no, it was like Nagisa had pointed out for him – all eyes would be upon the school. Asano needed to draw as little attention to them as possible, so he’d chosen a quiet option, yet something he could hike up the price for and still boast competitive profit numbers.

“What is this?” Karma peered round. “Some kind of resort on the go?”

It certainly seemed like it. Even though it was really just a massive tent in front of the school building, the insides had been decorated meticulously. Karma wasn’t exactly an expert at interior design, but he didn’t doubt that he was seeing top range materials. There was an entire lounge to relax in, a makeshift kitchen and bar, massage tables, a hot tub, even… It seemed to be a full spa, and it was already buzzing with the preparations of his classmates.

Asano smiled flatly. “Your job is simple. You stand outside, welcome people in, hand out complimentary champagne – both alcoholic and not. Here’s your uniform.”

He pressed it straight into Karma’s hands. It took him a brief moment to really take in what Asano had just done. The trousers were fine, just your regular formal black style, but the top half, if it even counted for so much, was just a very skimpy waistcoat and bowtie. Frankly, it was probably something a stripper would wear. He immediately saw right through it all. Asano had never been shy about playing _dirty_ before, no, but humiliation? That was Karma’s territory. So what, his plan was to ridicule him by dressing him in a stupid outfit? In front of his peers? Well, he could go along with it.

“You want me to wear this?” Karma played dumb.

He met his glare. “Call it eye candy, if you must.”

Karma was unable to hold his smirk back. It would have been a lot harder, if Asano hadn’t said anything so incriminating. Of course, trying to make a point out of humiliating him wasn’t Asano’s main goal here, he was far too driven by victory to focus all his energy on that. Which meant he hadn’t thought it through meticulously. And now Karma had the chance to turn it right back around.

“Well,” he cleared his throat lightly, and then raised his voice so that the others could hear him. “If _you_ want to see me all dressed up like this, then I can hardly say no~”

The ball was in Asano’s court, and he remained rigid, though ever so slightly taken aback. “You know that’s not what I meant Akabane.”

“It’s alright, Asano kun~” Karma clapped him on the back. “It’s the twenty first century, after all. Nobody here’ll judge you for finding another alpha attractive.”

“Enough,” he barked out.

So maybe this could be a little fun. He did as Asano said, changing into the uniform. Honestly, he didn’t really care about being practically shirtless, or the questionable looks he was getting from passers-by. The only truly bad thing about the outfit was how cold it was, since they were nearing November. Still, Karma realised that to undermine Asano properly, he had to do his ‘job’ as best as he humanly could, turning around to catch Asano’s eye with a wink every now and then.

It turned out that all it took for him to actually lose it was speaking to their customers. Karma took great pleasure, when an elderly woman asked him what their booth was, and why he was dressed in such a way, that _poor sweet_ Asano was ‘in denial for his long term feelings’, and just needed some kind of excuse to live out his fantasies. He hadn’t seen much after that, aside from her going inside to ruffle Asano’s hair and say something to him.

So, eventually he came out, a bottle of massage oil in hand. At this point, Asano was quite literally _inviting_ this. But he wasn’t stupid. For a moment, neither of them said a word, communicating only in their glare. Still, Asano did carry a certain determination. He must have thought whatever he was about to suggest through at least somewhat.

“Seriously?” Karma quirked an eyebrow.

“We’re not getting enough customers to buy the additional massage,” he explained. “So, you’ll be advertising it.”

Was he for real? “So you want me to rub massage oil over myself?”

Asano did look sincere. “You see to have no problem parading yourself around out here, so I doubt it will be a problem.”  

Karma saw it for what it was. A game of who could out embarrass the other. Fine. Humiliation was a discipline that couldn’t be mastered without having a tolerance for it yourself. So what if people were looking at him weird? Seeing Asano squirm every time he made a slight dig was more than worth it. Until, unfortunately, he just stopped reacting at all. Whether it affected him or not was a different question, but he looked bored and that was no fun.

“Say, Asano kun,” Karma strolled over. “How much am I getting paid for this?”

He didn’t bother to look up, from where he was counting the money. “Clearly you’re not.”  

Karma leant himself on the table. “But I have rights, Asano kun. First the unpaid labour, what next? Hell, I haven’t even had a break yet.”

“Akabane,” he said lowly. “If you don’t-“

He cut himself off, and Karma whipped his head around to where he was looking. Sure, he’d noticed a few other people come to stop and stare at their ongoing battle, but this was about to turn into a full blown argument. Being slightly sheltered by the tent, they couldn’t be heard clearly. Even with the price of entry, he immediately clocked people moving as if they were going to buy their way in. Well, it was true that drama sold well.

Asano took a look at his pile of money, and then back at Karma. “I have a proposition.”

“Oh?” Karma entertained.

“I _will_ win this,” he said confidently. “I have to, to establish myself, to show even the older classers that I remain on top. But this tactic, although effective, I need to be certain. We need more visitors.”

How precious. “You’re asking for my help?”

Asano’s shoulders heaved. “Yes.”

“And what do I get for it?” He faked batting his eyelashes. “Aside from charity.”

He thought for a moment. “My father might not be in charge anymore, but I still have influence. I’m the _class president_. I can see to it that your personal records are wiped clean.”

Didn’t seem worth it. “Hmm.”

Asano’s glare deepened. “Think about it Akabane. What kind of university would accept someone with a history like yours, regardless of grades? The fighting, absences, suspensions… Maybe you’d be lucky, but this is the kind of thing you’d want to be sure on. I can make sure it all goes away.”

Well, if he wanted to win that badly. Karma hadn’t been completely worried about his admittedly rocky behavioural records. He could turn on the charm when he really needed to, interview well, and as long as his test scores were decent… He supposed there wasn’t too much harm in working with Asano on this, though. He nodded, sealing their contract.  

* * *

“When you said we should come to the festival,” Nagisa hissed, “this wasn’t quite what I imagined.”

He was having some serious Karma problems, in both senses of the word. He’d been doing so well recently, pushing his pesky feelings aside, slowly getting over them. Apparently not fast enough, because surely the universe was _punishing_ him. There Karma was, stood in front of him, except he was half naked, clothed only in shorts so tight they could be underwear, and a bowtie. To make matters worse, he looked totally at ease, chest glistening and dripping with some kind of oil.

Nagisa was completely and utterly merciful that he had Daichi with him, otherwise his mind would have gone to dark places, and he wasn’t sure _what_ he’d have been able to do to stop it. It was the final day of the Kunugigaoka school festival, and Karma had seemed far more engaged in it than before. Was this the reason why?

Still, Karma perked up with a genuine smile, as if nothing was wrong. “Hey, you made it.”

“Papapapa,” Daichi motioned, alert and pretty happy to be in such new surroundings.

“You’ll get oil all over you,” Nagisa muttered, but Daichi didn’t seem to care that much.

“He’s _fine_ ,” Karma brushed off, immediately tipping Daichi upside down. He was rewarded with a couple of high pitched squeals, though at least he knew when to stop before Daichi got too queasy.

Nagisa went up on his tip toes, trying to peer over Karma’s shoulder. “What is this?”

With his free hand, Karma scratched the back of his head. “It’s a long story-“

“Hey! Over here!”

Automatically, Nagisa turned, only to come face to face with a pretty hefty looking video camera, a boom mic, and a hungry eyed reporter. It took him aback a little, but it wasn’t something he hadn’t faced. Though it had been hard to ambush them in public, every now and then, during the first month or two after graduation, the occasional journalist had tried to get a story. With Kunugigaoka so open like this, it made sense that at least local stations and such would be present.  

Karma handed Daichi back over to Nagisa, steeling himself. Nagisa just did his best to ignore the toxic scents slowly over taking his surroundings. It didn’t stop the camera from being pointed straight in his face, though.

“You were one of the hostage kids, right? How do you feel, months on? Why would you come back here? Do you blame Kunugigaoka Junior High for what happened?

“U-uhm,” Nagisa begun. “No questions, please, thank you,” he ducked out of the way.

Karma, for some reason, didn’t follow him. But Nagisa knew he could handle himself, and he wanted to be as far away from the flashing lights as possible. Looking over his shoulder, Karma had stayed where he was, and was talking the journalist. Nagisa wondered why for a moment, figuring that Karma had realised they wouldn’t be leaving with no story.

He kept looking over his shoulder as he walked, which meant he crashed right in to somebody. “Sorry!” He said quickly.

“Nagisa kun,” Asano himself looked down at him. “Akabane Two.”

He wanted to crawl underneath a rock and die. Of course he’d known running into Asano would be a danger, but one he could avoid in a crowd. Ever since the whole kiss thing, they hadn’t spoken a word to each other. And although Nagisa felt bad about it and still wanted to be his friend after everything, the awkward atmosphere between them was worth avoiding.

“Hi,” he said, because he wasn’t going to be _impolite_.

Asano frowned, looking at what was going on. “Time to handle _that_. Excuse me, Nagisa kun. We’ll have to catch up later.”

He didn’t get the chance to, though. Somebody else approached, a taller, hefty looking man in a finely pressed business suit. Nagisa couldn’t quite remember the name, but the face was familiar, it was all over the news. He was the man who had taken over the school, when Asano’s father had been asked to step down. Nagisa drew himself closer, only catching the end of the conversation, as the reporters were banished from school property.

“Asano kun,” his eyes bore onto him like hot coal. “Akabane kun. I think you should both join me in my office.”

Nagisa prided himself on his ability to sense intent in a person. Though he wasn’t sure what Asano and Karma both had in store for them, it definitely wasn’t good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, I'm so glad I got this out today! I'm going to a musical festival this weekend, so considering writing time, there probably won't be another update for a week or more, just a heads up! 
> 
> I hope you all liked this one. There's actually quite a bit of set up woven into this chapter in particular ^_^ 
> 
> As always, I lovelovelove comments and feedback, so please don't hesitate to leave some! I'll try my best as always to respond, even with limited WIFI


	51. End Of Term Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's the last day before the winter break

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I literally have work in five minutes, help. The speeeeeed

For reasons not completely clear to him, Nagisa was feeling incredibly impatient. Unlike before summer, where there wasn’t much to do towards the end of the term, they were being worked to the bone. Nagisa’s head was swimming, considering they hadn’t even had a break in the load after the final exams, but he supposed this was the path he signed up for choosing such a top school. Somehow, despite all of that, things seemed a little easier in the last few months.

“Pst,” Higashi poked him in the arm, “you know-“

Before she could finish what she was about to say, their teacher cleared his throat. “Higashi san.”

She gulped. “Yes, Sensei?”

“It may very well be the last day, but there’s still a lot of work to get through.” His demeanour softened a little. “Your conversation can wait until after class.”

Nagisa was surprised she wasn’t getting a harsher punishment that simple chiding, so he deducted everyone must be in a pretty good mood. He stretched out subtly, waiting for class to be over. At least _Karma’s_ punishment was over. He (a known trouble maker) and Asano (a first time offender but the ring leader of the situation) had been given essentially a community service punishment. Nagisa still wasn’t sure _why_ Karma had been _dressed_ _like_ _that_ , but the school hadn’t been happy. If they’d been avoiding more controversy since the assassination, giving a slightly sarcastic interview half naked hadn’t really helped.

It didn’t really matter to _Nagisa_ , aside from having to have Daichi to himself the past few months a lot more than he usually would. If anything, he was just glad it was over because a Karma who was forced to spend at least an hour a day cleaning with only Asano for company was not a happy Karma. At least they’d coped with it without trying to slit each other’s throats.

As his thoughts began to wander, class finally drew to a close. It seemed like Higashi wasn’t about to let go what she’d wanted to say, because she turned right to Nagisa the minute their teacher left the room with a heavy sigh and well wishes for the new year. With that, their second term of high school was officially over.

“Come with me,” Higashi grabbed him by the wrist, pulling him out of his seat so fast he could barely grab his bag. Nagisa yelped, but didn’t prevent her from dragging him swiftly out. “Walk with me.”

He almost complained that she wasn’t giving him much of a _choice_ , but he wasn’t in a hurry. Since Kungigaoka’s break started a day before Nagisa’s, he didn’t have to worry about picking Daichi up from nursery. Higashi was making it seem like whatever she was about to tell him was important. By dragging him away from the rest of their friends, he guessed she had to tell him something.

Finally, when they were surrounded enough by a bunch of third year students who wouldn’t care about their gossip, she let it out.

“Have you noticed anything about Kita and Nishi?”

Nagisa paused in his steps. Raking his mind back, there hadn’t been any alarm bells ringing. They’d seemed the same as they were everyday, and Nagisa rarely ever missed anything major. Had he just been blind, or something? Then again, Higashi was pretty observant herself.

“Not really, why?” He asked.

She looked at him with wide eyes. “Is it seriously just me?”

Nagisa let out a slightly awkward laugh. “I don’t know what you mean.”

“Nagisa kun, for real,” she glared, “they literally spent Christmas Eve together.”

It took his brain a moment to catch up with the meaning of that. He supposed it was a pretty romantic holiday in concept, and two high school kids spending it together would probably raise some questions. But they were just friends, weren’t they? If Nagisa really thought about it, it wasn’t out of the question, they _did_ seem close.

“Oh,” he let out, verbalising his thoughts at least a little bit.

She deadpanned. “I need to get them to admit it. Once their feelings are out in the open, they can date properly, and we’ll all be happy for them.”

“W-what if they want privacy?”

Higashi didn’t seem too concerned with that though. “Overrated. Maybe if they weren’t already so _obvious_ about it. Anyway, you’re helping.”

He most definitely hadn’t signed up for that. What did she even want to do, to prove their friends were in a relationship? Nagisa wasn’t sure what that would actually achieve, but to her credit she did seem very determined about it. And how could _Nagisa_ help? He hoped whatever she was planning wasn’t completely insane, though Higashi’s planning face was something to reckoned with, Nagisa was a tiny bit scared.

“You really think they’re together?” He asked, because at least that would be better than if they weren’t in a relationship.

Higashi smiled wickedly. “Of course. And after the break, we’re going to prove it.” Before Nagisa could ask what her plan even was, she pulled out her phone. “I have to hurry off now anyway, have a great New Year!”

Well, that was interesting. So it seemed Nagisa had inadvertently signed up to bug his friends. Perhaps he should give them a small warning, but that would probably just set them on edge. The least he could do is try and contain her from doing anything too bad. On his own by then, Nagisa paused to wonder if he really had been oblivious. Though he would he happy for his friends, he hadn’t seen it coming.

“Hey, Nagisa kun.”

Nagisa jumped, not immediately recognising the voice, and turned to face its direction. He faltered, locking eyes with Oshiro. Since he’d harassed him a little and been generally creepy on their first day, Nagisa had avoided any conversation with him. Oshiro, too, hadn’t approached him, after Rin had told him off. They’d mostly just acted like the whole interaction never happened.

“Yes you,” he said, assuming Nagisa was confused. Something was off, though, his demeanour less cocky than usual. “Uhm, can we go and talk somewhere?”

Of all the things that could be considered a good idea, going off somewhere alone with Oshiro was not one of them. But it wasn’t like Nagisa couldn’t handle himself, if he really had to. Maybe it was just his senses, but he was inclined to believe that there wasn’t any bad intent behind his request. In fact, he was curious.

Nagisa swallowed. “Okay.”

They didn’t quite walk together. Oshiro moved a few paces in front of Nagisa, leading him outside the school. Although there was more of a buzz of people outside, they were less confined and much more engaged in their own conversations. It was like hiding in plain sight. Although, Oshiro didn’t quite start talking then, shuffling Nagisa over to the wall.

“Man,” he said, “I’ve been trying to figure out a way to say this for months.”

Nagisa held his eye contact, detecting a kind of nerve behind his expression. So he wasn’t about to say anything bad? He wracked through his brain to try and prepare for whatever it could be, but nothing made sense. Why would he hold on to something for months, just to bring it up right then?

Oshiro nodded, a self-affirmation. “My family likes to play local news channels quite a lot. So, I was kind of surprised to see you on there, weeks ago now.”

Had they actually put him on their coverage? “You _know_ I went to Kunugigaoka Junior High,” Nagisa pointed out. Thankfully, most of this classmates didn’t dwell on the drama surrounding his old class.

He let out a light half laugh. “Don’t worry, that’s not what I’m asking. It’s not like you were on it for long, but I turned an eye towards it, you know anybody would if it was someone they recognised… Is the kid yours?”

Nagisa’s breath caught in his throat. Even back in the moment, bombarded with reporters at the festival, he’d forgotten about Daichi. The flurry of activity hadn’t bothered him back in the moment, in fact he’d seemed indifferent to the attention. How had Oshiro jumped to the right conclusion, based on just that?

“It’s just! It’s been messing with me,” he sighed into his hand, when Nagisa didn’t reply. “Maybe you were babysitting or something, but some guy cut you off and I didn’t really get a closer look. Uhm, you know there are rumours about you right? I’m sure you could be real scary, for sure, but a kid explains more than that yakuza thing could and-“

“Slow down.”

“Huh?”

“Slow down,” Nagisa repeated softly. “Your thoughts are all over the place.”

Oshiro took a deep breath, and his consciousness levelled out. “Look, you hear stuff, about what happens to omegas, but when it’s somebody you know? I don’t want to make you uncomfortable,” he panicked again, “if you don’t want to talk about something like _that_. But you must be so brave, to go through something so awful and come out the other side and look after a _kid_.”

It took Nagisa a moment to catch up with what he was implying, and then he blanched. His thought process made sense, because not many people would _willingly_ have a baby so young, but his and Karma’s situation had just been messy. He hadn’t been _assaulted_ , or anything.

“I’m truly sorry,” Oshiro bowed his head. “You’ve dealt with enough already, you definitely don’t need stupid… _comments_. I hope you’ll forgive me.”

Nagisa wasn’t sure how to even begin to correct him. On the one hand, he was glad that he regretted being _sexist_ , a lesson many people could do with learning, but it was for the wrong reasons. He shifted where he stood, trying to ignore the heavy way Oshiro was looking at him. Should he just accept the apology and move on? It wasn’t as if they spoke much. Then again, Nagisa didn’t want him to think he was some kind of victim. He had to set him straight.

“Hey guys.”

Rin came up behind Nagisa, cutting off the conversation. Of course, he probably assumed Oshiro was annoying him again. The moment he arrived, Oshiro met Nagisa’s eyes with a somewhat panicked expression. Rin wasn’t the most confrontational or, well, _protective_ of people, but he did have a certain level of superiority that came with age.

Dropping his gaze for a moment, Oshiro straightened. “Have a good break, Nagisa kun, Aino Senpai.”

“What did he want?” He asked, the moment he was gone.

Nagisa wasn’t sure why Rin was being so frosty. “To… apologise?” Honestly, he was still processing that entire conversation, not sure _what_ to make of it exactly. “He wasn’t bothering me, I promise.”

Rin’s demeanour softened. “Well, anyway. How was your day?”

“I’m just glad it’s over,” Nagisa admitted. “They gave us a lot of homework though.”

“Tell me about!” He complained. “All we heard was how lucky we are to have such a great education and a well known university and really we should _want_ to do more work. Bleh, it doesn’t make a difference to me, I’m leaving next year.”

That was news. “You’re not staying here for university?”

They continued to walk together, coming out of the school grounds. “I thought about it, but that’s not the reason I came here. Probably sounds ridiculous, but I just applied for Keisetsu because that’s what my friends were doing. I guess you are, though?”

“It’s what my Mum wanted,” Nagisa admitted. “I considered somewhere different, but… A _lot_ was going on around the time of applications, so I just went with it.”

Rin nodded along. “So, to the station?”

Steps faltering, Nagisa felt his heart drop. “I don’t know if I can go home.”

“What? Why? Are you okay?”

Nagisa forced himself to smile. “Don’t worry Rin kun, it’s nothing bad. It’s just, it’s Karma’s birthday today, and I still haven’t found him a gift. It’s not like I wasn’t trying, but nothing felt good enough. And now I’m _stuck_.”

There was a moment of heavy silence, where Nagisa was sure Rin was trying to find the words to say ‘good luck with that’, when he cleared his throat. “You know, I’m pretty good with gifts.”

“You are?” Nagisa felt hope rise. Maybe Rin could be his saviour. “I don’t even know where to start.”

“Karma your roommate, right?” Rin thought aloud. “Maybe something practical, since you live together and know the kind of things he doesn’t already own.”

He considered it for a moment. “Karma’s not… really a practical type. He bought me an endless pile of sushi stuff for my birthday.”

“Sushi? Is that why you have all those pens?”

“It’s my favourite food,” Nagisa tried to explain. “But he was mostly did it to embarrass me.”

Rin went quiet as they walked, before stopping in his tracks. “Does he have a favourite food?”

“He drinks strawberry milk a lot…” Nagisa trailed. “I don’t think there’s any gifts like that.”

In reality, there were many things he could buy Karma. Nagisa knew the kind of things he’d like, from his favourite video games to weapons, but it just didn’t _feel_ right, especially now he could afford something better than a simple pin. Thinking about it, Karma would probably prefer quality over quantity. But _what_?

Now that he’d thought about it, maybe he _should_ just get Karma milk. It would be a fair trade off, considering all of the sushi apparel. But simply something like that… If Nagisa wanted to get him back, then he simply had to _think_ like Karma would. The excess made to tease him… The only way Nagisa could even achieve something to that effect was getting him a life time supply or something.

“You just had an idea,” Rin said, “didn’t you?”

Nagisa grinned. “Thanks for all your help!”

It was totally unlike him, a gift Karma wouldn’t expect. For some reason, it made Nagisa giddy. Sure, it wasn’t anything deep and meaningful, but somehow that wasn’t the point. Not only would it be a taste of his own medicine, but there was a big chance he would also genuinely like his gift. So, on the brisk walk to the train station, with a little help from Ritsu to get to the right phone number, the Au Lait Series manufacturer received a strange call.

Aside from chipping the money in to buy their old class building, it was the single largest purchase Nagisa had made with his bounty. Sixty cartons of the stuff to be delivered to their front door, on the first day of every month for the next year. It basically translated to two cartons per day, but he could easily land up with an excess. For good measure, Nagisa bought a single carton, so he’d have something to give him. This experience, plotting something, was demonstrating the joy that definitely did come along with it. He understood, slightly, why Karma and Nakamura had so much fun together. Not that he’d be able to keep it up for as long as them, a taste of it was more than enough.

“I’m home,” he called, not long after he’d got off the train and made his way back.

There was no sign of life in their apartment, aside from a muffled sound coming from behind Karma’s bedroom door. Well, looked like he’d had a productive day. Stalling outside for a moment, Nagisa knocked, but only received yet another muffled noise in response. He didn’t often go inside Karma’s bedroom, since he had no real reason to, but he knew Karma would be far more vocal if he really didn’t want Nagisa in there.

“You’re still in bed?

Karma looked him dead in the eye. “It’s my birthday.”

“Karma, it’s _5pm_ ,” Nagisa let out, at the sight that greeted him. Karma looked half asleep, where Nagisa had left him in the morning.

 “Where’s Daichi?”

“Hiya!” A face popped out from underneath sheets, and Nagisa felt his bafflement dull.

Karma yawned lazily, pulling himself up so he was kind of sat. “I can hear you worrying from all the way over here.”

“Did you at least feed him?” He couldn’t help but question, since Karma wasn’t really the type to stay in bed once he’d gotten out of it.

He deadpanned. “You really think he’d be this chilled out without food?”

Nagisa forced himself to relax, he knew Karma was right, really. With the large workload, spending an entire day hiding in the warmth of bed almost sounded heavenly. He found it almost a little hard to believe that Daichi had seriously been kept amused by staying in one room all day, but he certainly didn’t seem to be in a bad mood.

“Eh,” Karma continued on, “we had fun, didn’t we, Daichan?”

Daichi giggled, emerging fully from where he was hiding. Unsteadily, Nagisa immediately noticed his attempt to pull himself to standing. Recently he’d got pretty good at standing on his own for a few seconds, but only if he’d pulled himself up on furniture, or been placed that way. So he immediately knew that an attempt to just pull himself up, especially on an uneven surface like a bed, wasn’t going to go so well. As predicted, he quickly lost balance, and Nagisa had to dive for him so he didn’t go toppling straight onto the floor.

Naturally, he found this _entertaining_ , clapping his hands together as if he wanted another turn. Nagisa didn’t dare put him down again, just in case he got the idea to try _that_ again, which would knock a good few years off Nagisa’s life. Thankfully, firmly in his arms, Daichi gave that pursuit up, wrapping his arms around his neck with a sigh. Finally, calm washed over him.

“Here’s your gift,” Nagisa said, manoeuvring a free hand to pull out the milk and toss it to Karma.

Karma looked at it for a moment, before shrugging and piercing into it with the straw. “Thanks.”

He didn’t know what was going to hit him. Maybe Nagisa could get used to this whole messing with people thing… Unlikely. It was a little bit of fun this one time, but it didn’t suit his personality, he thought. Still, seeing Karma’s face when they got that first delivery, he couldn’t _wait_. Without really thinking about it, he found himself lowering himself, so he was sat on the edge of the bed. Daichi realised, too, and began squirming as he dropped his arms, forcing Nagisa to let him go.

Thankfully, he didn’t go that far, still doing that weird army crawl thing over to Karma. Once he got there, he seemed content to just tug at Karma’s arm, at least pulling himself so he was sitting – a skill he had actually mastered. Karma didn’t seem to mind, ruffling his hair.

“I’m staying like this for the rest of the break,” Karma murmured.

“We have to go to my parents’ for New Years,” Nagisa pointed out.

Karma’s face fell. “Since when?”

He sighed. “They don’t get to see Daichi that often anymore… You don’t _have_ to come, but, you wouldn’t want to spend it here alone, right?”

For a moment, Karma did look like he was seriously debating doing just that, but his demeanour softened. “I guess not. They’re cooking, at least? Your Mum’s food is pretty great on special occasions.”

Well, as long as it convinced him. With everything considered, Nagisa felt like he got along a lot better with his parents, since moving away. He was looking forward to spending the celebration with them this year, although spending the break at Karma’s old house last year had been surprisingly fun. They’d still have New Years Eve alone, though. Well, not quite _alone_ , he remembered as Daichi giggled again. Never alone, but he wouldn’t want any different.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wish I had something clever to say here but AGH I NEED TO UPLOAD MAYBE ILL FIX THIS IN EDITING 
> 
> PRAY FOR ME LADS
> 
> First edit: okay so this chapter pushed me over 200,000 words can you believe it?


	52. New Year Time - Second Period

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Once again, the new year rolls around, and everyone takes a nap

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have returned from the war

It was weird to celebrate New Years again. The year before, they were just making it up as they went along, but this time around it felt like they should know what they were doing. Still, it was New Years Eve, and they didn’t have any particular plans. Nagisa was almost tempted to suggest a massive cleaning adventure again, but he didn’t quite have the same nesting urge anymore. He also figured that Daichi was a little too young to notice it was any different to a normal day, so he wasn’t concerned with doing anything for _his_ sake.

Daichi looked content enough anyway, sitting up on Karma’s lap in the living room. He couldn’t help but wonder if he should be worried about letting him watch TV and things, if that was bad parenting. Then again, Nagisa would probably find a way to be worried no matter _what_ he did. By the looks of things, Daichi was too worn out for much else. There was no way even a movie would keep him interested in any other circumstance.

To be fair, it was getting late. Even _if_ , now they were on their break from school, they supposedly had the luxury of waking up when they wanted, Daichi seemed to have other plans. Nagisa supposed he took after him in that sense, he too didn’t really sleep that long after the sun was up. There was no room for him to complain, he’d take not sleeping in over getting up several times in the night any day.

At least Karma didn’t seem determined to keep him up until midnight. “Time for bed, huh?”

Possibly at the sound of the word ‘bed’, Daichi attempted to squirm out of his grip. “Papapa,” he complained desperately.

He wasn’t _quite_ strong enough to break free from that, even if he was weirdly powerful for his tiny size. He had no problem wriggling away from Nagisa whenever he felt like it, anyway, but wasn’t that just typical? Thankfully, Karma seemed to have noticed that he really didn’t have energy left in him, and kept a pretty firm hold on him as he shifted in preparation to stand up.

“Dada,” Daichi tried again, holding his arms out for Nagisa in desperation.

Nagisa sighed, standing up to comfort him. “Come on Daichi, you need to rest.”

He tried to sound out something else, but it was muffled in his arm when Karma handed him over, apparently not _too_ annoyed at the blatant favouritism. When it came to things like this, comfort, Daichi seemed to cling onto Nagisa far more than he ordinarily would. With his head tucked into the crook of Nagisa’s arm, he gave up the fight, going pliant as Nagisa carried him into his room.

Daichi must have been _really_ tired, because the motion of Nagisa walking alone was enough to send him off to sleep. He made a sighing kind of noise, rubbing his cheek against Nagisa’s chest, before his eyes flitted closed. It would be a pretty long day tomorrow, anyway, so a long rest was probably for the best. He didn’t even stir when Nagisa wrapped him up and laid him down. Still, Nagisa kept his steps backwards light, so as not to disturb him before exiting the room.

“I’m surprised you’re not making a big deal out of that,” Karma said, when he flopped back down on their sofa.

Nagisa peered at him. “He’s always picking sides like that.”

He sat up a little more, looking at him curiously. “Ah, is Nagisa a little sleepy too?”

Was he missing something? Nagisa wasn’t particularly tired, all things considered, there was just a lot to focus on. At least he’d passed his first year of high school already, so he didn’t have to worry about grades for a good number of months. Daichi hadn’t been particularly rowdy either, unless you counted launching half his dinner onto the floor. Falling asleep did sound nice, he supposed.

At the thought, Nagisa replied with a yawn.

Karma chuckled lowly. “You’ve been trying to get him to say that for months now. You really should get some rest, if you’re gonna miss it.”

It truly took him a moment to catch up. _Oh_. Nagisa scoffed a little, he hadn’t been _trying_ to get Daichi to say ‘dada’, silently encouraging, maybe. He was just so used for Daichi lunging his arms out at him, he supposed he hadn’t thought about it too hard. Too tired to have a huge reaction, Nagisa instead felt a kind of warmth build up

“Wanna watch Sonic Ninja?” Karma poked him in the arm.

“Hmm?” Nagisa replied sleepily. “It’s on?”

Karma shrugged. “I can get it. It’s better than watching some idol show anymore.”

“I hope you’re not breaking any laws,” he mumbled.

When a reply didn’t come, Nagisa guessed he probably was, but he didn’t really case. The opening music begun, and he forgot everything else, nostalgia and excitement taking over. It _was_ his favourite movie. Nagisa sighed, feeling the familiar thrum of emotion. Perhaps it was a little childish now, but sometimes that was what put a smile on his face.

“How come you’re not trying to show me anything new?” He couldn’t help but question, sensing Karma’s focus. Mostly, it was Karma who was actually _into_ movies. Where Nagisa liked to sit back and enjoy them, Karma tended to analyse and construct deep opinions. Especially recently, since they only had one TV, Nagisa was dragged along for what were supposed to be the classic good ones. He kind of enjoyed the one with the singing nuns.

Beside him, Karma shrugged. “You’re too tired to appreciate it.”

They didn’t discuss much during the movie, aside from a couple of biting jokes. In fact, in between action scenes, Nagisa felt his eyes drooping. He didn’t quite fall asleep, more drifting in and out of consciousness, though at some point he ended up using Karma’s shoulder as a pillow. Honestly, he was surprised Karma didn’t move him, other than to nudge him when the film was over.

“You’re gonna miss the new year.”

Nagisa blinked. “Oh.”

Karma stood up, stretching out lazily. “I mean, you don’t have to come outside, but-“

“No,” he said quickly, “I want to.”

Wrapping a blanked around his shoulders, he followed Karma out onto their balcony. Even with the slight cover, Nagisa still shuddered in the winter chill. Still, oddly, it felt like it was worth it. Below them, sounds of festivities and parties rung out, everyone else far more prepared for the celebration than they were. He brushed his mind away from that, though, looking up at the fractured moon.

A lot had happened in the last year. Last time it was New Years, he was _pregnant_ , yet Daichi would be _one_ soon. It felt so long ago, and yet like the blink of an eye. On top of everything else, the assassination and high school, the year had been pretty crazy. Yet, somehow, it had dwindled to a rather peaceful close. Strange, that. He wouldn’t want to spend it with anybody else, though.

Beside him, Karma was silent, seemingly lost in thought. A lot had happened between them, too, in the last year. Nagisa was sure a part of him was always going to _yearn_ or something, but he was happy, at least, not empty. Even if he couldn’t have Karma in a way that was more than friendship, but better that than nothing.

Regardless, as always, he found himself drawn to his side. Standing so close to a Karma deep in thought wasn’t good for the sake of his _health_. Under the light provided by the moon, his golden irises gleamed with… something. Whatever it was, Nagisa was magnetised closer, the effect so quick that it almost shocked him.

Of course, Karma noticed, looking at Nagisa in question. Somehow, he didn’t really care right then. Even if he knew he was going to beat himself up for it later, Nagisa couldn’t help himself from wondering what _would_ happen, if he did stand a little closer, they could be kissing. It was a dangerous thought, but it wouldn’t leave him, to the point his breathing hitched, and he almost went for it. Doing _that_ would be easier than saying something like ‘ _I’ve been in love with you for the last six months or so, possibly longer, but I’ve been trying to get over it and I’m not sure if I love you less or more than I did_ _before, and I’m just really confused right now’._

And then the first bell rung out, before he could do much of anything.  

“Looks like the year’s over,” Karma turned to face him properly.

“It’s been crazy,” Nagisa said, his breathing short.

As if Nagisa’s heart wasn’t already racing, Karma shot him a small half smile. “Wouldn’t change anything though.”

Anything?! Well, Nagisa supposed that some things were just supposed to happen. If they hadn’t… maybe they wouldn’t be there, right then. He loved being around Karma, though. Did he wish there was something more? Maybe. He wasn’t used to feeling this way, but it was hard to not feel a little lonely, with so many people coupling up.

“You’re worried about that kind of thing?” Karma laughed a little, and then Nagisa realised he might have said some of that out loud. “Go date somebody then. It’ll be good for you.”

Nagisa snapped straight out of it, a chill running straight through his bones. Huh? Somebody else? But there had only ever been Karma… Was that really what he wanted? Well, Nagisa supposed that was his answer. Karma wanted him to be with somebody else, somebody who wasn’t him. Nagisa should have known, really, that there was no chance of _them_. Well, he did know, but there was always fleeting hope… He still felt sick.

“Happy new year,” Karma commented, when the final bell sounded.

Nagisa mumbled his reply. “I think I’m going to go to bed.”

He didn’t wait for Karma to wish him ‘goodnight’. In fact, Nagisa just went directly to his room, flopping onto his bed as he was. Despite how exhausted he was, sleep didn’t come that easy to him. Nagisa just couldn’t make himself comfortable, without feeling a hollow chill of emptiness. He didn’t cry, at least, he was better than _that_. When he finally did pass out, it was the kind of flit where he flitted between consciousness, until it was finally morning.

The moment getting up became justifiable, Nagisa stumbled to his feet. He figured that he could at least get things ready, rather than moping in silence. Since they were going to be out of the house for a full, long day, it did require _that_ level of preparation. He wasn’t sure how much be trusted Daichi’s levels of focus, to only bring a toy or two. Try five minimum.

It wasn’t long until Daichi seemed to wake up on his own anyway, which gave Nagisa something to do directly. Since he had already been up, he swiftly got a bottle ready, something that was second nature at this point. Daichi had got past the point of instantly crying whenever he was hungry at least, and was already stood up in his crib expectantly when Nagisa went in.

“At least you have some energy,” Nagisa said, lifting him up. He didn’t bother enforcing any proper eating, and instead sat down on the sofa and allowed Daichi to sit on his lap. If Daichi was confused about the change, he didn’t make much of a fuss about it. Nagisa let out a long breath, and leaned his cheek onto Daichi’s soft hair.

When Daichi was done drinking, Nagisa went about changing him, and made the wise decision to get him dressed for the day _after_ breakfast. In fact, he was lucky Daichi was content enough to sit in the high chair when he put him there, amused with the orange segments Nagisa gave him. He spoke unintelligibly to himself, as Nagisa finished getting everything ready.

“All done?” He asked, when Daichi was definitely playing rather than eating.

Daichi nodded, raising arms. Well, the mess could have been worse. Soon enough, whatever food hadn’t made it into his mouth was whipped away, and Daichi was dressed in clothes fresh for the day. Considering Karma wasn’t even up yet, and it was still pretty early, Nagisa was proud of his own efficiency. Not that they really had to leave any time soon.

It didn’t take very long, after being left to his own devices, for Daichi to get bored and start tugging on his trouser leg. Even if Nagisa had been really busy, he wouldn’t have been able to stop himself sliding down on to the floor. At least Daichi didn’t seem to want to do anything too complex, quickly crawling off to produce a small ball. Well, if that’s what he wanted.

He still seemed to find it hilarious that balls would roll if he pushed it hard enough. Even more funny, it seemed, when Nagisa pushed it back at him. Nagisa didn’t get what was _humorous_ about it, but whatever floated his boat. He pushed it back a little harder, so that it hit Daichi’s out stretched hands with a little bit of force.

“Good job,” he encouraged gently.

Daichi broke out into a massive grin. “Bu-buh-”

In question, Nagisa shuffled a little closer. “Ball?”

Expression morphing with concentration, Daichi opened his mouth and tried again. “B-Buh-buh-“

“ _Ball_.” Nagisa said slowly. “Buh-all.”

“Buh-“ He pouted, and then launched himself to crawl into Nagisa’s lap. “Dada.”

Nagisa didn’t mind so much. “Yeah, I guess that is a little easier to say.”

“Buh. Buh. Buh.”

He had to admire the determination. Well, Daichi was only ten months old. Three (and a half?) real words wasn’t bad, Nagisa thought. He didn’t know if it was _good_ , either, but he supposed everyone developed at different rates. For a moment, he seemed content to sit right there, half on Nagisa’s nap. In fact, a little _too_ content.

Considering he hadn’t been awake too long, Nagisa wasn’t sure if he should _let_ Daichi nap already, but he supposed it was a good opportunity considering they would be out all day. From all appearances it was a light sleep, when his eyes eventually flitted closed, so Nagisa didn’t dare move him. There were worse things he could do, other than let Daichi fall asleep on him.

Surprisingly, not long after that, Karma actually came into the living room, fully dressed and seemingly ready to go. He looked like he had something on the tip of his tongue, but he didn’t say whatever it was when he noticed Daichi. Light on his feet, he swiftly made his way around into the kitchen, and grabbed something to eat. Whatever it was, they existed in silence, until Daichi woke up on his own.

He blinked slowly for a minute or two, before crawling out of Nagisa’s lap like nothing had even happened. Apparently the sofa was more interesting, considering he went straight over to it, managing to pull himself to his feet a little better now he’d had plenty of practise. Nagisa left him to it, knowing he wouldn’t bother going far.

“What time did you say we’d be there?” Karma asked, when Nagisa approached.

He pulled out his phone, taking a look at the clock. “I didn’t, really, but we should probably leave soon.”

Karma nodded, and that was that. Like some kind of wedge was between them now, they didn’t say anything else. Admittedly, living together meant that they wouldn’t catch up like normal friends, and didn’t need to talk constantly, but Nagisa had learnt to gauge the difference between types of silences. This one was uncomfortable and heavy, full of something that needed to be said.

Instead of speaking to him, though, Karma sidestepped. “You ready to go, Daichan?”

At the sound of his own name, Daichi sidestepped around the edge of the sofa, just barely hanging on, to look up at Karma in question.

Karma walked over to him and crouched down. “C’mon, I know you don’t get it yet but today’s a celebration.”

Whether he understood any of that or not, Daichi at least seemed intrigued by it. He looked intently at Karma, before moving like Nagisa hadn’t seen him before. For a while, he’d gotten pretty good at figuring out the basics of using his legs and feet, but he was still pretty slow and tentative, even with the solid support. Yet, for some reason, he didn’t seem to hesitate in taking steps towards Karma, completely on his own.

It was going well for him, too, until he seemed to realise that he wasn’t holding onto anything. Thankfully, Karma sensed the panic in his expression, and manage to grab him before he face planted. Being whisked into Karma’s arms was significantly more fun than toppling over, so Daichi giggled, not realising the significance. 

“You gotta be more careful,” Karma said, picking him up properly. “Just don’t run away us now, huh?”

He didn’t seem too concerned with walking anywhere else. It didn’t take long to get out the door after that, due to his earlier preparation. It was pretty cold outside now, in the middle of winter, but the walk to his parents’ wasn’t a particularly long one. Seemingly, since they didn’t live close to any shrines, this part of town was all but abandoned.

Soon enough, they were knocking on the door, and then Nagisa’s parents were right there. “Ah, Daichi!” His father exclained, reaching straight for him.

 _Hi Nagisa and Karma too_ , Nagisa thought internally, but he didn’t say anything. Really, he couldn’t blame his parents for being all over Daichi. Firstly, Daichi was _Daichi_ , basically all the adorableness the world had to offer put into one tiny person. Second, he was their grandson, and they hadn’t seen him in a while. They’d visited a few times back and forth, since the move, but naturally it was different from living in the same tiny apartment.

“Something smells good,” Karma commented, pretty much an expert at dealing with his parents at this point.

His mother nodded. “You can come in, Nagisa, Karma kun. Happy New Year.”

At least she wasn’t still referring to him as ‘Akabane kun’. That was some progress. Moments later, they were settled down inside. Even if it was clear where his parents’ attention really was, it felt nice to actually catch up. The last year had been a whirlwind when it came to _their_ relationship, but for some reason it was beginning to feel settled. Whatever the case, Nagisa was content at worst, elated at best.

Daichi, at least, was overjoyed with the change in environment, which was fair enough. At least he usually got to see something else when they took him to nursery, but it was winter and there wasn’t a lot to reasonably do. Well, the winter break would be over soon enough. That was a thought. Already, they were nearly done with their first year of high school.

With the increasingly quick passage of time at the forefront of his mind, they sat down for dinner. They hadn’t bothered with any traditional osechi dishes last year, so it had been quite a while since he’d eaten anything like it, and Nagisa’s mouth was salivating. Aside from being filled with nostalgic joy in the form of a meal, it was quite entertaining to see Daichi’s take on it. He’d only been given some of the plainer, easier to eat things, but it had been a while since he’d tried something completely new, at his little face just lit up.

For some reason, it struck him that the conversation that had developed wasn’t really _about_ him. In fact, his parents were asking Karma something to do with his school work. Nagisa would be paying attention, ordinarily, but his thoughts were drifting. Not that he ever had been, but Karma didn’t feel like a _guest_. In a sense, it wasn’t the best for his confused mental state, especially after the night before.

Regardless, they were soon done with the food, and there were no other grand plans. It was a little different from the New Years Days of the past Nagisa had just spent with his mother, so they ended up watching the Emperor’s Cup. Nagisa didn’t really follow sports that much, with the exception of baseball he couldn’t help but pick up from Sugino, but he still found it enjoyable enough to forget the rest of his problems.

And then it was all over, just like that. They left the apartment with a supply of mochi, and promises to visit (aka bring Daichi over) more often. Due to his early nap, Daichi was definitely flagging by the time they were down the stairs, and was straight to sleep with the motion of walking. Now that it had been pushed back, the quiet between him and Karma was a lot more comfortable. Maybe things continuing the way they had been, on the surface, wouldn’t be so bad.

When they finally reached their front door once again, however, it was completely blocked by a suspect crate. It took Nagisa a moment to realise what it was, before his heart started beating faster. Setting this up had been one thing, but finally seeing the results? Of course, it was the first of the month, and they were going to get a delivery like this for the rest of the year.

“ _Huh_?” Karma questioned aloud. “What’s this?”

Nagisa couldn’t help himself. “Why don’t you open it?”

If Karma caught on and became suspicious, he didn’t show it, following Nagisa’s direction. Thankfully, it wasn’t sealed particularly hard, just enough for transport. Karma made quick work of opening the lid, enough to take a look inside, and then went completely silent. Even though Nagisa wasn’t leant over it in the same way, but from his position he could see that in the crate was a _lot_ of strawberry milk. If the order was correct, enough for two a day for the next month, until the next shipment came in.

“What-“

“Of course I wouldn’t just give you the one,” he explained, “for your birthday.”

Karma spluttered. “Y-you-“

Enthusiastically, Nagisa nodded his agreement. “You gave me a bunch of sushi things because it’s my favourite food, so I thought, it was only fair to give you your favourite.”

Blinking once, twice, Karma burst out in laughter. He said something that sounded like ‘ _I can’t believe this’_ , before taking one, and standing up straight. “I’m not sure I like strawberry milk _this_ much.”

“That’s too bad,” Nagisa replied, feeling oddly firm. “This wasn’t an easy gift to find. You wouldn’t want to waste any of it.”  

“I’m going to _hate_ it by the end of the month,” he complained.

Nagisa’s one single devious bone in his body made itself present. “The year.”

Stunned, Karma looked him dead in the eye for a moment, before bending down, wrapping his arms around Nagisa’s shoulders. Not that Nagisa had noticed it, but he’d definitely grown a little, since they were last in any kind of embrace. He didn’t remember having to stretch this much to return it. With Karma’s hug, which caught him off guard, Nagisa’s messing days were over and done with.

“Thanks,” he said seriously, before letting Nagisa go and clearing his throat. “Anyway, you’re gonna have to help me with all of this, if you’re _concerned_ about wastage.”

“But _I_ hate strawberry milk,” Nagisa followed after him.

Karma tutted lightly. “You should have thought of that~”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And Karma will regret some of his choices. 
> 
> Sorry about the space between updates. This one gave me a bit of trouble, but I've honestly been pretty busy considering I start university in a couple of weeks, and have to move to the other side of the country :') Also ill, but I'm always ill. 
> 
> Next time, y'all will hate me, but it's necessary whoops. Have fun until then~


	53. Date Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fulfilling his promise to Higashi, Nagisa helps to stake out their classmates' date

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> baby shark do do do do do do
> 
> That didn't have a purpose but now it's stuck in your head. Don't say I don't supply you with entertainment.

Despite knowing it would be worse to go back on his promise, Nagisa couldn’t help but feel guilty about invading his friends’ privacy. Higashi, right next to him, seemed to have little of that guilt. She had been certain, though, that her intelligence was correct. Supposedly, Kita and Nishi would be on a date somewhere around the area, and based on her knowledge of Kita’s choice of favourite drink, they were staking out the entrance of a coffee shop. Why was he doing this, again?

“Oh my god,” she said loudly, clapping a hand over her mouth. “There they are.”

Nagisa peered around the corner. Sure enough, she wasn’t lying. However, they weren’t really doing anything coupley, and he wasn’t convinced. Just because they weren’t the same gender didn’t mean that their close friendship had to signify something romantic… But he supposed that they could easily be together too. Nagisa’s stomach turned, at the realisation he was getting sucked in.

“Damn,” Higashi muttered. “I can’t see them anymore. Let’s get a better view.”

“Wait!” Nagisa’s instincts came roaring in. “They’ll see you if you move like that.”

Okay, he was totally in this. Nagisa sighed, and forced himself to detach from the situation. If he needed to watch somebody, where would he go? They were out of Kunugigaoka, so Nagisa didn’t know the area as well as home, and would have to rely on his immediate senses. They couldn’t just run out in front of the café, he knew for a fact there were pretty large windows, and they could easily be seen. He needed to find a better position.

Nagisa raised himself up a little, still using the wall for cover, as he tugged on the building’s drain pipe. Satisfied it would be able to support his weight, Nagisa found his footing. A voice in the back of his head that sounded an awful lot like Karasuma warned him that he really shouldn’t be doing this kind of thing in public, but he justified that it wasn’t really _free_ _running_. As long as he kept himself low and out of sight, he wasn’t putting anybody in any danger.

Higashi cleared her throat, looking up at him with a kind of awe. “What are you _doing_?”

Half way up the wall at that point, Nagisa hung off to look at her. “Spot checking.”

Easily enough, he pulled himself up and onto the roof, keeping his body flat, so he finally had a good view of the street. Surveying his options, he judged that a small crepe cart would be the best place. It was better to hide in plain sight, amongst a small crowd, rather than behind a tree or something that would seem more suspicious. It was big enough to conceal them, in a good position, and not something you’d pay great attention to. Perfect.

Maybe it had been a while, and Nagisa was taking this far too seriously, but Nagisa pointed the location out, like he was giving some kind of command. Higashi seemed to get it at least, and impressively didn’t make herself that noticeable as she crept over to the location. To save time, Nagisa took the high drop from the roof, breaking his fall with a roll and dusting himself off, before he joined her too.

“Okay,” Higashi said, once they were in position. “Once this is over you’re telling me how you learnt to do that.”

“It’s-“ He scratched the back of his head. “A long story.”

She flicked around. “You’re not helping yourself with the whole Yakuza thing.”

Nagisa laughed awkwardly, brushing it off. What was more important was his eyes falling on his target. Wait, target?! He was definitely far too into this. At the same time, though, it wasn’t like they were doing anything incriminating. From his now better position, they really were just ordering a drink.

“I’m not sure what we’re gaining from this,” Nagisa commented.

Higashi looked at him like it was obvious.  “Obviously so we can be happy for them and support their relationship.”

“But they-“

“Just wait,” she cut him off. “They’re in a public place, so even if they do something, it’s going to be really subtle. You might not believe me Nagisa kun, but I don’t want to expose them or anything, I just… don’t like there being secrets.”

Nagisa swallowed. “You know you could just… ask them? Like you could have just asked me about the Yakuza thing. Nishi would probably tell you at least. You don’t actually have to sneak around to make accusations.”

“It’s not as simple as th-“

“Nagisa kun? And, uh… Was it Higashi san?”

Immediately, the both of them turned away from their stake out. Nagisa relaxed, when he saw that it was only Rin, though Higashi still looked like she’d seen a ghost. Well, at least what they were doing probably wasn’t too obvious, especially to Rin with his limited context. The two of them had never really had a long conversation about his classmates, only ever mentioned in passing.

Nagisa smiled awkwardly. “H-hi, Rin kun.”

He approached them casually, like they weren’t up to anything. “How’s everything going?”

“Great!” Higashi said. “Hey, did you know that Nagisa’s actually a ninja?”

“Is this that Yakuza thing again?” Rin scratched his neck. “That’s an old rumour.”

“Why is it a rumour at all!?”

The vendor of the crepe stall cleared his throat. “If you kids are just going to stand there and talk about the Yakuza I’ll have to ask you to leave.”

“Wait no,” Higashi said, “I’m going to buy something, promise… Uhm, how much is the chocolate and banana one?”

He glared. “Two hundred yen if you move somewhere else.”

“Okay!”

Whist he began to prepare her crepe, Nagisa considered going back to the task at hand, but he wasn’t sure Rin would understand why they were stalking their friends. It wouldn’t be odd, at least, for he and Higashi to just be hanging out. They had a decent cover there already and Nagisa was going to rely on it. Even when Rin raised an eyebrow at him, showing his suspicion, he turned away.

“Oh hey! Fancy seeing you guys here!”

At that point, all three of them jumped in surprise, with Higashi nearly dropping her crepe, though she dove dramatically to rescue it. Looking straight at them was Nishi and Kita, take away drinks in hands. True to his mission, Nagisa observed them. There was no sign of couple behaviour, but they were stood close together and looked comfortable doing it.

Kita, though, looked a little more suspicious. “I thought you said you were going to be busy today, Haia chan.”

“Not at all!” She waved her arms rapidly. “I was running some errands, but I’m all done now, yep!”

She raised an eyebrow, turning to Nagisa and Rin. “And you two?”

“They’re on a date!” Higashi quickly fired, before they had a chance to say anything.

Nagisa’s mouth went bone dry, so much so that he couldn’t force the words of denial out of his throat. And of course, at such an accusation, it was only natural for his cheeks to flair up pink. Instantly, he realised that only looked more incriminating. It wasn’t that he had a problem with Rin, but the idea of him dating anybody?  

Eyes darting between them, Nishi seemed a little confused. “Really? I didn’t know about that.”

Once again, Nagisa startled, when Rin grabbed his hand. “It’s new,” he said, not missing a beat.

“How about you?” Higashi asked, realising her chance.

“Oh,” Nishi laughed. “The same, I guess.”

Though she covered half her face with the cup she was drinking from, Kita worse a slight blush. “Anyway.”

Satisfied she’d finally got her answer, Higashi nodded. “Is that the time, well, I have to go! See you guys back at school!”

Well, that was over fast. Nagisa watched, as she sped away at top velocity, muttering something to herself. He wasn’t entirely sure what she was planning to _do_ with this newfound information, but a part of him didn’t even want to know. Hopefully, it really was just knowing for the sake of knowing, rather than anything bad.

“Yeah,” Rin nodded, “we’ll leave you to it.”

Nagisa allowed himself to be pulled along in Rin’s direction. That had gone about as well as it could have, if you didn’t count accidentally being caught twice because of lack of spacial awareness. Even if it did mean he had to pretend to be on a date with Rin, at least they had the answer.

“So,” he said, when they were far enough away. “Are you going to tell me what you guys were doing?”

He wasn’t entirely sure how to explain it. “Higashi just really wanted to know if they were actually a couple or not.”

“I see,” he said lightly. “Well, you’re a good friend for going along with it. Do you want me to walk you back to the train station, now that your, uh, accomplice has gone.” 

“A-are you sure that’s not too much trouble?”

Rin just hummed in response, and then changed the subject. All in all, it was actually kind of nice to hang out during the school break. Nagisa really had been meaning to, at some point, but he was always so busy with Daichi and everything else. The only reason he had agreed to _this_ was he already promised, kind of. Otherwise, it just didn’t feel right, leaving him when he didn’t have to. He tried to forget it, at least, and actually exist in the moment.  

“Uhm,” Nagisa realised after clearing his mind, there was still a weight in his hand. “Y-you’re holding my hand.”

Rin looked down at where they were joined. “Eh, sorry about that,” he said, without letting him go. “I wanted to make it convincing.”

“I don’t mind!” Nagisa said quickly, not wanting him to feel bad. “Thanks for that.”

“This has been kind of fun,” he shrugged. “You know, we should do this for real sometime. More… alone, though.”

“E-eggh-“ Whatever Nagisa was about to say was cut off by his own fall. Normally, he would have just tripped, but the time he had to catch himself was shortened since he had to drop Rin’s hand first. He had less than a second realistically to figure out what to do. Working mostly on instinct, Nagisa managed to propel himself, rolling over and using the momentum to launch back onto his feet.

Rin blinked. “Woah, Higashi san wasn’t kidding.”

“Oh,” Nagisa refused to meet his eyes. “It’s nothing, really.”

He looked excited, though. “No seriously! How did you learn that?”

“Parkour,” he thought fast. “I used to do it a lot for fun!”

Yeah, that was a nice excuse. Even though Nagisa was a little (more like a lot) rusty, and his technique wasn’t particularly refined due to the last few months of pregnancy and doctor’s orders to not take any risks, it made him feel almost fresh again. He knew Karasuma had taken great care to get them to promise not use their training in public, but he figured small things like that were okay.

“Maybe you could show me?” Rin said, words becoming a slight staccato with nerve. “Or, I mean, I don’t think _I_ could do anything cool like that, but I’d love to see it.”

Nagisa paused. “T-that wouldn’t be boring for you?”

“Not at all!” Rin shook his head vigorously.

“I’d like that then.”

With little else to say to each other, now that arrangement was in place, and they were near the train station anyway. When he was actually on the train, the scenery speeding out his vision, Nagisa couldn’t stop possibly overthinking it. Was that a _date_? Of course, it probably wasn’t, because nobody would ask _him_ on a _date_ in the first place… But with the context it sounded like it. It couldn’t be, because you only asked people on dates if you liked them like that, and there was no way Rin could. They were just hanging out. He was satisfied with that.

But for some reason, he couldn’t let it go. Once the train pulled into Kunugigaoka, Nagisa felt his nerves spike up, like he’d done something _wrong_. He knew, of course, that he hadn’t – it wasn’t even a date! Even if it was, that wouldn’t be _bad_ , exactly. Logically, Nagisa knew it was a bad idea to overthink this as much as he currently was. All it did was set him on edge, as he got home.

“Welcome back,” Karma called from the living room. “Have fun?”

“Y-yeah!” Nagisa said far too quickly. “Uh, you?”

If Karma was going to answer, he didn’t get the chance, because suddenly there was a small weight barrelling into him. Considering he’d only just started the walking thing a week or so ago, Daichi was slowly getting it, for short distances, before he gave up and flung himself at the nearest object. Honestly though, it wasn’t the worst thing.

“Dada,” Daichi squealed, hanging off his trouser leg.

It just reminded Nagisa that he didn’t have _time_ for dates or not dates or whatever it was. Sure, spending time with his friends was okay, Nagisa had accepted that, every now and then. But he already didn’t really get to spend all that much time with Daichi, considering that nursery tended to wear him out. The time he did get, he wanted to use soaking as much of it up as possible.

“Hi,” Nagisa greeted softly, and bent down to pick him up. As always, Daichi wrapped his arms around his neck once he was up there, clinging on. He kind of hoped he wouldn’t grow out of it, at least any time soon. It freaked him out that he would have his first birthday soon enough, like an entire year had gone by with the blink of an eye. Having a one year old son… Definitely terrifying.

From where he was sat, cross legged with what looked like math homework, Karma looked up. “You know you were only gone for, hmm, three hours?”

Nagisa sighed. “It always feels like longer.”

He laughed lightly. “You need to get out more or something.”

“U-uhm, actually!” It spilled out of him, before he could stop himself. “I said I would see Rin at some point.”

Like a blur, Karma was suddenly on his feet, so close to Nagisa there was barely room to breathe. “Who’s that?”

Nagisa gulped. “My friend from school. He asked me to go out with him.”

“Oh, so it’s a date, _huh_?” Karma said, teasingly.

“No! It’s not like that,” he practically begged. “It isn’t!”

For a moment, Karma’s eyes widened, like he was going through several emotions at once, none of which Nagisa could really pin down. “It _is_ a date,” he said, though the teasing was gone, and then let a humourless life. “You don’t have to lie.”

“I’m not!” Nagisa continued to protest.

Karma brushed him off. “Doesn’t matter. Why, it’s not like you have to ask my permission.”

“B-but, Daichi…”

He shrugged. “We have fun, don’t we, Daichan?”

Daichi just gurgled a little, apparently not in the mood for a conversation.

“Hey, Daichan,” Karma continued. “Remember what I taught you. Show me a fist.”

Nagisa’s jaw dropped, when Daichi, after thinking about it for a moment, did just that. Sure, it wasn’t that impressive that he could form a fist, but doing it on command was something different. He looked poised, too, purposeful. And immediately, his blood boiled. This was exactly why he shouldn’t leave for too long!

“You taught our son how to throw _punches_?! On second thought-“

“ _Relax_ ,” Karma drawled. He formed his own fist in demonstration, and very lightly pounded it against Daichi’s. Clearly knowing what to do, Daichi immediately released his fist and drew it back, letting out a sound to mimic the sound of an explosion. “See.”

 Nagisa let his tension drop. That was right, he was being too quick to judge. Karma would be absolutely fine, he _knew_ that, he was probably better at looking after Daichi than he was, anyway. So he nodded, and let it drop, remembering to text Rin later to say he definitely could come hang out with him. Hang out, because it was _not_ a date.

Yet, the next morning, he found himself worrying about what to wear. If they were going to do free running, he needed something definitely suitable. Nagisa didn’t have a lot of that, except his gear from 3E. He was still surprised it hadn’t been seized from them, to be honest. He supposed he could at least wear the trousers and undershirt, and one of his regular coats over the top… Nagisa realised he needed to take a moment to evaluate _everything_.

Everything else went like normal; get Daichi up, changed and fed, then entertainment, then breakfast, until whenever Karma chose to get up. At that point, as he did most of the time, Daichi decided to drop whatever he was doing and barrel into Karma. That gave Nagisa the time to clean up, and then go back into his bedroom to stare at his reflection for the twenty third time.

He cringed internally, when it really was time to go. “Do I look okay?”

Karma looked at him quizzically. “What kind of a question is that?”

Flushing from head to toe, Nagisa should have known that was a bad thing to ask. “D-don’t worry.”

“I mean, looking at me like a naked mole rat isn’t helping.” 

“I’ll see you later,” Nagisa bit out, ready to slam the door behind him, but he calmed down enough to give Daichi a kiss on the head at least.

It wasn’t a date. It was just two friends spending mutual time together alone. Nagisa kept telling himself that, the entire way, because the more he told himself that, the truer it became in his head. Unfortunately, he didn’t have that long to convince himself, because they were actually meeting in Kunugigaoka. Keeping the lessons he learnt in 3E in mind, Nagisa didn’t want to take any risks. Something dangerous like free running had to be done out of the public eye, and a place he knew well. So, they were staying in Kunugigaoka, the only place Nagisa had ever lived.

Nagisa himself hadn’t really been there that much, but there was a small warehouse kind of close to Yoshida Motors, which he knew a few of his ex classmates had used for extra practise since it was abandoned. It seemed like a good enough place, other than their mountain. Nagisa didn’t know why, exactly, but it felt kind of wrong to take an ‘outsider’ there.

He was the first one there, but Nagisa didn’t think Rin was the type to cancel without letting him know. He’d texted him the directions, at least, but it could be pretty tough to find your way around a place you weren’t familiar with. So, he waited, and wondered if this was a bad idea. Rin had said he was interested, but Nagisa wasn’t sure how he felt about being _watched_.

“You know, asking me to meet you in a place like this isn’t helping the Yakuza rumours.”

Starling at the voice behind him, Nagisa turned, to see Rin standing casual. “I-I-“

Rin waved him off, though. “Don’t worry, I’m just messing with you.”

Nagisa forced himself to calm down. Maybe he should just learn to live with this. Sure, it wasn’t the best impression to give people, but maybe being secretly tough was better than being weak and helpless… There was room for a moral debate on all of that, but at least for now, Nagisa would accept his fate and try to look less threatening.

“So!” Rin continued on. “Are you going to show me something cool or what?”

“Right,” Nagisa remembered. “What did you want to see?”

He scratched the back of his head. “I don’t really know how this kind of thing works. Can you do a circuit, or something?”

Nagisa mentally took in his surroundings and calculated a possible route. Since he knew his friends had used it, he deduced he could trust everything to hold his weight. And because he was meant to be demonstrating, the route he figured out would perhaps allow for some fancier, ‘show off’ moves. Once he’d analysed and taken everything in, he nodded, and then sped off.

It was easier than the mountain course, but then again Nagisa had been pregnant back then or, later, had just given birth, so of course it would seem that way. He definitely saw the appeal, though. Whilst you could get around the place with nothing more than a good sense of balance, the sheer amount of beams, pipes, and chains hanging from the ceiling meant you could use a large number of different skills.

He decided the best way would be start at the top beams, and work his way down. Getting up there was no problem, he mostly made use of the existing ladders where he could, transferring to convenient bricks and pieces of metal to get to the beams closest to the roof. He paused for a moment, collecting himself and calculating his route one more time, before breaking out into a run.

Though it was true he was a little rusty, since he hadn’t done anything like this for a year, it was all engrained in his muscle memory. He ran from beam to beam, finding a good place to flip off, landing with just a tiny wobble a little lower. Maybe he should have been worried about that, but it only shot familiar adrenaline through his veins. He continued on, swinging and flipping his way down. At the lowest level of beams, he decided to show off a little more, since he wouldn’t injure himself if he did fall.

In the end, Nagisa backflipped off some of the low beams, landing securely with slight flourish. He panted, his body finally catching up with more exercise than it was used to. Somehow, it felt almost cathartic, to be doing this kind of stuff again. Though, he wasn’t sure why he missed it so much. Nagisa almost wanted to climb up again, and have another shot.

“Woah,” Rin called, “that was amazing!”

“I-it was nothing really.” Nagisa approached him again, unsure. He’d almost forgotten that Rin was watching him.

He shook his head. “Honestly, Nagisa kun, you’re amazing.”

Nagisa couldn’t help but flush.

“Actually, I kind of wanted to talk to you.”

A pit formed in Nagisa’s stomach. “Is something wrong?”

Rin took a deep breath. “I like you a lot, Nagisa kun.”

“I like you too,” he softened. Friends were _supposed_ to like each other.

“No, I mean, I _really_ like you. Like, I want to see you more like this, and hold hands like yesterday. And, if you let me, I’d like to call you my boyfriend.”

Nagisa’s brain essentially blue screened. Rin… Liked him? Wanted them to _date_? He was almost tempted to look around for hidden cameras, because why would somebody like Rin have feelings for _him_? Why would _anybody_? He could tell, though, from Rin’s demeanour that he was probably being genuine. So the appropriate thing to do would be to reply, rather than just

He hadn’t even _considered_ Rin in that way. Nagisa tried to picture it, but he didn’t really have anything to base it from. Though, he knew feelings could be developed over time, and he did get along with Rin… Dating him wouldn’t be so bad. For some reason, the idea made him feel funny, an emotion he couldn’t quite pin down. Though, even though it shouldn’t have stuck out, he couldn’t help but remember what Karma had told him.

And then his brain switched back on again. He shouldn’t even be considering this! It was the very reason why he couldn’t be with Karma, he had Daichi to worry about. He didn’t have the time for a boyfriend. Nagisa already felt awful about going out two days in a row, trying to maintain a relationship with that limitation wasn’t fair, on _anybody_. But Rin was being direct with him, and he at least deserved that returned.

“Rin kun,” he started shakily. “There’s… Some things you don’t know about me.”

He blinked. “Don’t tell me you’re actually involved in crime.”

“No! No,” Nagisa looked away. “It’s not that. I… I have a baby. Well, he’s not really much of a baby anymore, but-“ Rin’s eyes were glazed over, he noticed. “Are you okay?”

Because his mouth was hanging open, Rin choked on his breath. “You have a _what_? B-but-“

“I was in my last year of junior high,” Nagisa begun. It hadn’t necessarily been his intention, but once he started explaining, he didn’t really stop. He left out a lot of the gory details, especially the assassination training, but there was enough to get the jist. Nagisa had just made a mistake, which he didn’t even remember, and it had turned into the best part of his world. “I love him more than anything else,” he explained. “Which is why I can’t do this. I wouldn’t put anything else first.”

For a long time, Rin was silent. “It doesn’t change anything?”

“H-huh?”

His shoulders slumped. “I can’t say this isn’t going to… take me a _while_ to wrap my head around, but- Look, maybe I’m being dumb here, but my feelings haven’t changed. And I wouldn’t expect anything like that out of you. I promise, I can handle it.”

Internally, Nagisa felt like he was standing in quicksand. He knew it was a bad idea, _knew_ it down to his bones, but Nagisa didn’t want to _hurt_ him. Part of him just wanted to run, but that wouldn’t solve anything. If it was like quicksand, another part of him said, then he would take the hand outstretched to help him, wouldn’t he?

“Okay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nagarin5eva? 
> 
> Look, sometimes you have to go on a long journey before you reach your end destination. Read the Odyssey, it took that dude ten goddamn years to sail across the Mediterranean. And then he fought like a hundred men to get his wife back with his son and some farmer sidekicks it's wild. I don't know if Nagisa will end up fighting a hundred men for Karma's hand in marriage, but that's an image for you. 
> 
> I mean, credit where credit's due, at least Rin knows how to confess his feelings. Unlike SOME people -_- 
> 
> Anyway I'm going now bye hope you had fun in the next chapter Karma takes his son on a stealth mission. Brace yourselves.


	54. (Not) Stalking Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Karma is Not Crazy and just wants to buy his son some shoes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all gonna be facepalming so hard.

Karma didn’t like this. He had no idea why, but he just didn’t _like_ _it_. It seemed he had been wrong when he thought that Nagisa being taken and unavailable because of more than a psychological barrier would help him get his feelings in check. And he was fully aware he was acting like a toddler crying because an old toy was taken from them… not that Nagisa was a _toy,_ or ever really his in the first place.

It wasn’t even like Nagisa was away longer than usual. He always tended to see this Rin guy in school. But now there was this _air_ surrounding him at all times. Karma couldn’t quite put his finger on what it was, but it was just different. By all appearances, Nagisa looked happy. Karma hated it. It wasn’t like this boyfriend was bad, from what he could tell he seemed kind of vanilla. Definitely not good enough for Nagisa, but then again Karma doubted there would be _anybody_ good enough.

“Nagisa,” Karma half called, bored. “Whatcha doing?”

Like he was in his own little world, Nagisa looked up very sharply. “Huh?”

Well, that was suspect. “You looked busy, is all.”

“I’m just texting Rin,” he said, a soft smile growing on his lips.

Of _course_ he was. How long did they really need to text for, exactly? Maybe that was the difference. Nagisa might be physically with him, but his attention was clearly elsewhere. It ground his gears, that was for sure. Though, Karma couldn’t exactly just go and rip the phone out of his hands and demand Nagisa talk to him, because that would make him look absolutely insane. And Karma wasn’t insane, he was just… annoyed.

“Oh _really_?” He decided playing it off was his best option. It was what Nagisa would probably expect out of him. “What kind of texts?”

Nagisa looked back down at his phone. “I don’t know, just texts?”

“Let’s see.” Naturally, Nagisa startled, but Karma was quicker, and stronger. He practically launched himself onto Nagisa, easily manoeuvring the phone out of his grip. For some reason, Nagisa didn’t attempt to fight him. Karma wasn’t that interested in reading his messages, but something caught his eye and made him want to hurl. “ _’Nagichan’_?!”

“Can I have it back now?” Nagisa asked, defeat lacing his tone.

Karma forced himself back to neutrality. “Sure,” he climbed off him. “I didn’t take you for the embarrassing texts type.”

“It’s just a nickname,” he defended.  “I don’t _love_ it, but that doesn’t matter, right?”

He knew when he couldn’t win. If Nagisa wanted to be gross and cutesy, well Karma supposed there was nothing he could do to stop it. This had been his own doing, he knew, in the first place. Unfortunately, he couldn’t convince himself that Nagisa had gone and gotten himself a boyfriend totally based on what he’d said, even Karma wasn’t that arrogant.

Before the conversation could go any further, Karma looked at the time and figured Daichi had been napping for long enough. It was a small miracle he’d even wanted one, in the first place… Maybe nursery had been wildly interesting. He ignored Nagisa’s look of question as he pulled himself to his feet, and just as predicted, Daichi was already stood up in his crib. In all honesty, he was actually attempting to scale the crib, to let himself out. Whoops.

“Hey there,” Karma said lightly. “Don’t do that.”

Recently, Daichi had picked up the concept of ‘don’t’, so of course he was rewarded with a glare. “Up.”

He didn’t feel like arguing with him about it. Karma reached down, lifting him out of the crib. Not that Daichi seemed to want to be held at all. In fact, he started squirming the second Karma had him up. Happy to let him do what he wanted, he just placed him down on the floor, holding on for a second or two to give him the chance to find his grip. Unfortunately, he left it a little too long, and just face planted when Karma removed his hands.

Karma couldn’t help but laugh lightly at his little face, crouching down. “Dummy,” he ruffled his hair, “you know walking doesn’t work that way. You want some help?”

Appearing to think about it for a moment, Daichi shook his head, crawling back over to the crib so he’d have something to help pull himself up. Once he managed it, he let go with determination, taking a good amount of slightly shaky steps all the way over to the wall. Looking pretty pleased with himself, and his ability to stay upright, he skirted around it, making for the door.

“Yeah yeah, good job,” Karma said, opening it properly for him.

He practically raced out again, though his tiny legs couldn’t really catch up and it wasn’t long before he toppled over again. Karma supposed he just needed practise, though that was the point he did just give up and go to a much faster crawl. For a moment, Karma wasn’t that bothered about what he was gunning off to do, until he realised.

Unfortunately, Daichi was still weirdly quick at crawling, and made it to the living room before Karma had a chance to stop him, swiftly grabbing the TV remote from the table, and – _somehow_ – turning it over to some stupid kid’s show. In any other circumstance, he’d be impressed that Daichi had even figured out how to do that, but it also meant that Daichi would complain (aka cry a lot) if he changed it back over. So he was forced into watching it. Knowing where to pick his battles, he gave up, lifting Daichi so he could sit on the sofa and see it properly.

Nagisa, still engrossed in his phone it seemed, didn’t seem to care. “Are you still okay to pick Daichi up tomorrow?”

He almost felt the urge to roll his eyes. “I haven’t changed my mind in three hours.”

Apparently frustrated about something or other, Nagisa flopped back. “I don’t know what to _do_.”

“ _Huh_?” Karma looked at him curiously. “What do you mean?”

Nagisa blinked. “You seriously want to help me?”

“Sure,” he shrugged, “why not?”

He groaned, then, looking at Karma seriously. “Tomorrow’s Valentines Day and I don’t know what to do about it. I-it’s easy for girls, but I don’t know what’s appropriate. Who gets chocolate for who if you’re both guys? Does being an omega change things?”

“You’re asking me if you should buy chocolates for your boyfriend?”

Nagisa nodded, and Karma wanted to throw himself over the balcony. How was _he_ supposed to know, anyway? But then he paused, and thought about this in the long run. A happy Nagisa in general was better than a Nagisa angry at _him_ for purposely giving bad advice. Well, not necessarily, but Karma did have to live with him, which unfortunately meant it made his life easier to stay on Nagisa’s good side. His bad side? Weirdly terrifying.

“You should go for it,” Karma said finally. “It would be more awkward if he got you something, and you show up with nothing.”

Nagisa chewed his lip. “You’re right. Uhm, a-also, do you think it should be homemade or is that too much? We’ve only been together for a month.”

 _Only_? In Karma’s eyes, it was a lifetime. “Just buy some.”

With that settled, Karma continued to mope for the rest of the day. He even ended up paying attention to Daichi’s stupid TV program, because at least that was better than watching Nagisa return to his own little world. It continued to plague him throughout the night, straight through to the next day.

He couldn’t help but latch onto the thought that Nagisa had changed recently. Not that Karma needed a reason, but it was an excuse to be suspicious. He’d heard quite a lot about a personality change - once starting a relationship - being a cry for help. So he wasn’t being ridiculous. Nagisa’s… boyfriend seemed pretty harmless, but maybe Nagisa was being fooled somehow (ignoring the fact that Karma _knew_ how good at judging intentions Nagisa was, because that didn’t fit with his theory). So then it was reasonable to check it out for himself, right? Sure, Nagisa could physically defend himself, but he was too _nice_. Karma was an alpha, he was _supposed_ to protect him.

So, when he woke up after little sleep, Karma may have shoved a few unusual supplies into his school bag. He still had to pick Daichi up, not that he minded that. In fact, maybe Nagisa would be less mad at him if he found out (on the small chance he would), if he used Daichi as a shield. Nagisa was rarely mad when Daichi was held in front of him.

Of course, he said goodbye to Nagisa as normal, and took Daichi off to nursery. No complaints about being left that day, he seemed immediately distracted by some toy or other. And then came school, which was considerably harder to not want to wish away when he had _things_ he had to do. Since they’d already taken their final exams, there was no entertainment of a challenge, he’d have to wait for the second year to roll around for that. He’d read ahead, anyway. So it was all boring this, basic thing explained over again that, yawn yawn.

Until the day finally came to a close, and then Asano’s annoying hands were slamming down on his desk. Whatever it was, Karma didn’t have time to listen or care. Even though they’d spent quite a bit of time together due to their punishment (which really was more Asano’s doing in the first place), they hadn’t spent much of it _talking_. And he preferred it that way, even if a bit of accidental teamwork had driven up their profits at the festival.

“So,” he begun, “the project.”

Karma looked up at him, just barely. “The what?”

“Don’t play dumb with me Akabane,” Asano bit out, and then straightened. “Look, it seems that we’ve been thrown together on this, so we’ll be getting it done right away.”

There was a project? With Asano. Well, if he insisted. “Sure thing, but you’re coming with me.”

His eyes narrowed. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“ _Well_ ,” Karma leant back in his chair, “I promised I’d pick Daichi up today, so you better learn to walk and talk.”

He was almost surprised, when Asano followed after him. Tempted to test him, Karma made it a brisk walk, and since he was pretty sure Asano didn’t know this part of town, he didn’t have to chance to walk ahead or make him talk _school_ _work_. He really didn’t care about whatever it was they were meant to do, at least, he didn’t _yet_ when there was something more important to focus on.

Luckily, Asano didn’t manage to get a word in before they reached the nursery. If Karma wasn’t running on something time sensitive, he’d have dragged it out, because Asano looked, in short, hugely uncomfortable. Any opportunity to make him look like that, well, Karma didn’t want to waste it. Maybe he’d manage to orchestrate this again sometime, with a video camera.

He didn’t get the chance, before Daichi became aware of his arrival. “Papa!” He launched himself at Karma’s shin.

“Hey~” Karma picked him up. “Have some fun today?”

Daichi wrapped his arms around his neck, but peaked around curiously. “Dada?”

“Sorry about that.” Karma sighed. “You wanna go see Dada?”

He nodded, which made Karma’s life a lot easier. They couldn’t continue the conversation, because a slightly distressed worker came rushing round the corner, panting. She paused when she saw them, straightened, and shot him an approving nod. Daichi looked pretty innocent in his arms, but he had to wonder just what he’d put the poor woman through.

Asano cleared his throat. “Is that all, then?”

It really wasn’t. Karma turned and faced him. “Asano kun, introduce yourself to Daichan.”

His brow creased. “But he’s a baby.”

“So?” Karma laughed lightly. “He’s just another little guy.”

Gulping, Asano bent forward a little. “Hello. I’m Asano Gakushuu-“

“Gaga,” Daichi reached out curiously, batting him on the nose.

Asano jerked back like it was poison. “Teach your son some manners.”

“He’s _one_ , or, almost,” Karma defended. “It’s harmless.”

“Hmm,” Asano said, like he didn’t believe him, and then paused. “What’s it doing?”

Karma looked between them. As Daichi often did when he wanted to be held, he kept his arms out, motioning towards Asano with a pout. Weighing out his options, Karma decided that he may as well do what he wanted. Before Asano had the chance to stop him, Karma pushed Daichi into his arms, relying on his reflexes to catch him.

He didn’t hesitate to pull out his phone, now his hands were free, and snap a quick photo. “Smile!”

“Gaga!” Daichi giggled, nuzzling into his neck.

“ _Why_?” Asano asked flatly.

Laughing, Karma shoved his phone back in his pocket. “He likes you, clearly. Definitely didn’t inherit that from me. Anyway, to the station.”

“Wait!” Asano called as he chased after him, not too well practised at travelling fast with a baby in his arms. “The station?”

Karma nodded. “We’re buying him shoes.”

“ _Shoes_?”

He didn’t bother answering Asano. In fact, handing Daichi over to him had turned out to be the most effective way to shut him up, after that. He didn’t even bother complaining about being dragged a town over. So he was taking Asano along for this, apparently. Karma supposed he was fine with that, it would make him look more casual. It wasn’t like he was properly attempting to stalk Nagisa, he was just keeping an eye out, in a location he was likely to be in.

It was a decent length journey, and after a while Karma couldn’t hold off at least talking a bit about the project. Nothing that interesting, or hard, or much work… He had to give credit where it was due, Asano could more than carry his weight. Still, once the train pulled into the station, Karma changed the subject immediately. If Asano _wanted_ to argue then, well, he had the absolute handful that was Daichi.

There was no sign of Nagisa on their way to the shoe shop. But that didn’t mean anything because he wasn’t… following him. This was the best place to buy shoes around, it just _happened_ to be in the same general location. And if Nagisa found out and complained, then, he was just making sure their son’s feet were in good hands.

“Welcome,” a youngish girl greeted them. “Ah, are you getting shoes for the little one?”

Asano jabbed him in the shoulder. “Shouldn’t _Nagisa_ be here for this?”

“We talked about it,” Karma shrugged. “He said he doesn’t care, as long as they fit. I think he’s just kind of sick of stopping Daichan from walking around when he wants to.”

The girl who worked there smiled. “So, you want him measured?”

“Sure thing,” Karma offered, finally taking Daichi back from Asano.

He wasn’t really sure how this kind of thing was meant to go, but he followed all of her instructions. As she said, he sat down with Daichi on his knee, holding him as still as he could. Daichi didn’t seem all that impressed with the set up, immediately trying to scoot forwards and grab whatever device she was using for measuring.

“You want this, huh?” She said gently, letting him hold it. “Don’t worry, I can go get a spare one.”

Karma sighed, and ruffled Daichi’s hair lightly. He didn’t seem that bothered, once occupied, with her swiftly manoeuvring his feet around. After she was done announcing his size, Daichi had just about figured out how to slide the gauge around. She left them to it, which oddly made Karma feel pretty out of his depth. You couldn’t really go that wrong with shoes, right?

Looking at a few options, he pulled out some pretty basic trainers. “What do you think of these?”

“Akabane,” Asano glared at him, “you really think I have an opinion or _care_?”

From his lap, having been transferred there immediately so Karma could go look at shoes, Daichi made a grab for his arm. “Gaga gaga gaga!”

Asano looked down. “Fine. They’re fine. Just put them on him.”

Making sure he had the correct size, Karma bent down and tried to put it on him. Immediately, Daichi’s focus changed, curious at what he was doing. It took him quite a bit of manoeuvring, more than it would to put socks on him. In fact, once he seemed to notice the difference of the foreign object, he wanted it off. Though, ignoring Asano’s snigger as Daichi kicked him in the face, he managed to get them on and fastened.

“Wanna go for a walk?” Karma encouraged, picking Daichi up and popping him on the floor.

He didn’t seem so sure about it at first, but he took a tentative step. A couple of seconds later, and he managed to walk from sofa to sofa. Enough so that Karma could see he hadn’t instantly tripped wearing them. Satisfied with that, Karma tried not to think about the price of something Daichi would quickly grow out of, and paid for the pair.

Asano cleared his throat once they were out of the shop. “Are you done now?”

They hadn’t come across Nagisa yet, so Karma definitely was not done. “How about some coffee?”

He deadpanned. “There’s something going on.”

Perhaps Karma would have actually explained himself to Asano, but then his eyes caught a flash of blue. “Get down!”

Surprisingly, Asano didn’t question or disobey the sudden order, crouching down behind a large bush. Daichi giggled lightly, but didn’t reveal their position. As it turned out, his instincts were right. That was clearly Nagisa, deep in conversation with another guy who must be Rin. Fighting his instincts to growl, he instead observed. The guy was taller than Nagisa, although that wasn’t hard, and seemed pretty plain looking and harmless. _Vanilla_. A part of Karma almost wished he had crazy tattoos or something he could warn Nagisa to stay away from.

“Oh,” Asano said, “so _that’s_ what you’re doing.”

“I’m not doing anything,” Karma denied.

Asano glared. “You’re _obsessed_ , Akabane. There’s a lot of things I wouldn’t but past you, but this?” He shook his head.

He scoffed. “I’m not _stalking_ him. That would require more finesse, in which case I wouldn’t have brought _you_.”

“So,” he straightened up. “What’s your price for my silence?”

Karma raised an eyebrow. “You joined in, as an accomplice. You can’t try and tarnish my reputation without ruining your own. Say, people won’t believe you came all this way with me just for that, especially your,” he coughed for added effect, “ _minions_ , since they know you used to be close with Nagisa.”

“Seek psychological help.” Asano finally had enough, and made to walk away. “We’ll be completing the project come the weekend.”

“Can’t,” Karma called out. “It’s Daichan’s birthday.”

He turned over his shoulder. “Monday morning then.”

Soon after that, he was gone, and Karma was just left with Daichi. “Well,” he addressed him. “Now we’re going home, and _nobody_ finds out about this, yes?”

Daichi just drooled a little on his shoulder, which was response enough.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you all enjoyed that one! Well, poor Karma, huh? This chapter makes me want to write a Karma and Asamo buddy cop au. Sorry this took a little longer than expecting, I once again got very ill. I'm okay, but it was questionable there for a second :') 
> 
> Also! The shoes thing? I recently had to leave my job working in a shoe shop, so I added it in this chapter as a tribute to that. I measured so many babies for their first pair of shoes! Honestly, best job ever, even if I often did get screamed at or, yes, kicked in the head. Some parents would even take photos of me putting the shoes on, bless. 
> 
> Important notice!
> 
> Please don’t be alarmed, first of all. I just want to keep you all up to speed. So, this is the last chapter before I start university. I’m moving halfway up the country on Saturday, and will be beginning my Japanese language degree (yay!). It also means that now I don’t have a bunch of free time. Although the first year doesn’t really count towards the end grade, doing well means I’m going to get a scholarship for next year?
> 
> Why do I really need a scholarship? Well, because I’m moving to Tokyo! Or, hopefully. I need to get the grades, and need the right Japanese university to accept me, but you get the idea. I’m moving to Japan, at least. And, you know, it’s really kind of an expensive country. To live there for one year, as part of my degree, I need all the moneys I can get. Plus, I’m kind of an overachiever. The point is, I really need to study as my first priority.
> 
> Please don’t feel guilty about accidentally pressuring me or anything, because you really don’t! I love all your comments like “please update soon!”, because it just tells me you guys want more, which is such a compliment!
> 
> I am not giving up on this fic in the slightest. It’s just, likely going to slow down quite a bit. Remember when I used to update like once every three days before I got a job? And now it’s kind of around once a week ish? Well, it’s just going to slow down again. Honestly, I can’t tell you by how much, because I have no idea what the size or consistency of my workload is going to be. I’m considering putting it on a proper ‘once every two weeks’ schedule, but really I don’t know yet.
> 
> I absolutely love writing this story, and I love how much you guys seem to love it! So I’m still going to try my best, but you just need to be aware of that. I’m not sure when the next update will be, but I’ll see you then :D


	55. Birthday Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daichi turns one

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im back from the dead

Somehow, though he was as well rested as possible these days, Nagisa felt extremely drained. In theory, he supposed a large amount of it was the emotional strain of everything surrounding him, trying to split his time as fairly as possible between everything, on top of school, and the fact that Daichi would be turning one. He felt bad about it, but the idea of his son’s first birthday made him feel kind of sick. It was unreal, that it had already been a full year.

He wasn’t sure what he was really supposed to do for a first birthday. Daichi didn’t even understand what the concept of that meant, so Nagisa couldn’t exactly ask him what he wanted to do. In fact, really he knew he could give Daichi a bowl of stones and he’d be happy for hours, but the thought of that was kind of awful.

“Poke,” Rin said lightly, doing just that to his cheek.

Nagisa blinked, focusing back on his surroundings. “Oh,” he said, “did I zone out again? Sorry.”

Just smiling, Rin didn’t seem that bothered about it. “Thinking about something?”

“Nothing interesting,” he half lied, not really feeling like talking to Rin about anything like that. Though, frankly he didn’t have an issue with it, it was just… something he didn’t think he’d be able to understand.

“Am I seeing you this weekend?”

He grimaced slightly. “Sorry, I’ve been out far too much already.”

Rin just sighed, and then leant forwards. Nagisa tried his best not to flinch when he ruffled his hair. It wasn’t that Nagisa didn’t want to spend time with him, it was just if he did he’d spend the entire time eaten up with guilt. As it already was, it was bad enough that he had to go to school every week day, where Rin would see him already.

“That’s lunch,” Nagisa said, when the bell sounded to signify the break period was over. He stood up, shoved the remnants of his food back in his bag, and made for the door.

“Hang on just a minute,” Rin called out, momentarily sprinting to catch up. “We’re going in different directions.”

He knew what was coming, and braced for it. Like it happened in slow motion, Nagisa saw Rin’s face come closer towards his, and he waited for the perfect half second to slightly twist his head, so that Rin’s lips planted themselves on his cheek. Maybe Nagisa was being crazy, but he kept panicking whenever it happened. A part of him wondered whether it was the risk of not being in complete private ever, because it wasn’t like he’d never kissed anybody before. Or perhaps it was the context that mattered, since they’d all been mostly meaningless.

Still, he was able to pull away after a second or two of contact, smiling as honestly as he could. It was enough of a goodbye, apparently, since they really did pull in separate directions after that. With only a little bit of the school day left, everything else went rather quickly, a blur of an English lesson and more homework. After that, at least, he was glad to be on his way home.

Keeping a good pace when he got off the train, Nagisa actually reached the nursery earlier than he usually would. Often, he’d manage to make it right before closing, but there were a couple of other families still there. He weaved his way through them in the entrance way, so he could announce himself there. But the worker shot him a certain kind of look, and he knew something was up.

It didn’t take him long to find out. Right around the corner was Daichi, though not instantly recognisable. Honestly, Nagisa didn’t want to know _how_ it happened, but he was completely covered in mess. Aside from stray bits of mud, he seemed to have a bunch of paint all over himself, in an array of colours. Almost hilariously, he had a bunch of red in his hair, which only heightened his resemblance to Karma.

“It was finger painting today,” the worker explained. “We’re working on cleaning everyone up, but…”

That didn’t explain why paint was covering his whole body, but he still didn’t feel like questioning it. At least he was painting with proper materials this time it seemed, rather than his usual choice of food. It seemed to be that it was _full_ body painting, rather than just finger, but there was only so much control you could expect out of a one year old, he supposed. Honestly, Nagisa was slightly surprised something so small could cause so much mess.

“Don’t worry about it,” he smiled and began to walk over. “I was going to give him a bath anyway.”

Daichi’s face lit up. “Dada!”

“Hey,” Nagisa picked him up, ignoring the smudge of still wet paint over his side. “Did you have fun today?”

He didn’t answer him, but instead put his hand on Nagisa’s cheek, smudging him with a red handprint. Considering the amount he’d dealt with the last year, a bit of stray paint was the least of his worries. Surprisingly, Daichi didn’t immediately complain when Nagisa started to make his way out of the building, which meant he must have been pretty worn out.

It didn’t help that it was the height of winter, though it hadn’t snowed like it did a year ago. Probably finding the warmth comforting, he remained practically snuggled in his arms, in fact noticeably dropping off a few minutes later. He hadn’t done that for a long time, either. It made Nagisa realise that maybe he really did miss the days where Daichi would easily just fall asleep against him.

By the time they got home, he still hadn’t stirred, so Nagisa hoped the bath he was definitely going in would wake him up more. He felt bad, but if he just let Daichi sleep now, he’d likely be up all night, and he didn’t want to deal with the ramifications of that. So, before he unlocked the door, be cringed before gently shaking Daichi awake, bracing himself for a look of betrayal.

However, instead of pouting at him, Daichi yawned peacefully, slowly blinking his eyes open. Nagisa immediately wondered if he’d accidentally brought home the wrong child. Well, he supposed he should just count his blessings. He doubted _anything_ would keep Daichi in such a passive mood once he immediately put him in the bath.

“We’re back,” he called out, shifting the door open.”

“-ack,” Daichi tried to mimic.

There was a moment’s pause. “Welcome home,” Karma called back, using the formal version of the phrase with a bite of sarcasm.

Daichi jolted even more awake, at the sound of his voice. “Papa?”

Knowing when to pick his battles, Nagisa bent down, letting Daichi stand on his own. He hoped the paint on his hands had dried during the journey, because he went running off (well, he walked as fast as he could currently manage) down the hallway. He stretched his arms out, now that he was childless, deciding to waste no time in running the bath. Otherwise, their entire apartment was going to be covered in paint.

By the time the water was running, Karma had picked Daichi up, holding him at an arm’s length as he came into the bathroom.

“What happened to…” He stopped mid question, face morphing into a smirk. “Say, Nagisa… Did you walk home like that?”

It took Nagisa a moment to realise what he was talking about. He hadn’t even thought about what he’d looked like, back at the nursery, he’d just wanted to go home… Before he could turn his head away to look in the mirror, Karma’s hand was just _there_ , touching his cheek. Like his brain was suddenly struck by loose electrics, he jolted, though Karma must have mistook it for discomfort, removing his touch immediately.

Nagisa swallowed. “It was finger painting day, apparently.”

“No kidding,” Karma looked down at Daichi. “Is _that_ how this happened?”

Though he tried his best to reach out for him, Karma was quicker, and managed to dodge. Not too happy about that, Daichi tensed up for a moment, before tears began to spill out of his eyes. Since he was already covered in paint, Nagisa took Daichi off him, soothingly rocking him a little, whilst managing to glare. He seemed to get over it pretty quickly, at the very least.

Since apparently Karma wasn’t going to be all that helpful, Nagisa balanced Daichi on the lip of the counter. It was a skill developed with a lot of time and practise, but he’d become an expert at holding him up and undressing him at the same time. Still a little upset, Daichi did his best to protest, but Nagisa still managed to get his clothes off and him into the bath.

He was eventually joined by Karma, who had rolled his sleeves up and got on his knees. Daichi seemed to be in a forgiving mood, allowing Karma to hold him up. It meant that Nagisa had the free hand he needed to fill up a small jug, pouring it over Daichi’s dirty hair. Surprisingly, he’d never been that fussy about actually being washed, which was convenient. The bath water quickly began to turn multi coloured, as paint was washed off.

Daichi appeared to notice the difference compared to his regular baths, lunging for the colours. It was a good thing Karma was the one holding him up, because despite his size Daichi was oddly strong, especially when he wanted to go places. Though, maybe Nagisa was worrying too much about it. The water wasn’t even that deep, so he was probably fine… But really, so close to that first birthday, Nagisa wasn’t that keen for all the growing up stuff.

“I think you’re good,” Karma said, breaking the silence.

Apparently he wasn’t, because Daichi immediately tried to wiggle out of his grip. Since he had water and soap on his side, he managed it within a few seconds, giggling as he did so. At least the actual cleaning part was out of the way. Nagisa sighed, letting him play as he wanted to for a few minutes. That, it seemed, turned out to be a slight error of judgement. Daichi got this devious glint in his eye, and then slammed his hand down across the water, splashing him.

It was a good job Nagisa was used to recognising that kind of look, and managed to dodge. Karma hadn’t been in the direct target line, but apparently decided that was enough, picking Daichi straight up despite his protests. Daichi gave up, though, letting Karma wrap him in his towel, since warmth was preferable.

Which meant Nagisa was left to drain the tub, and then try and wash the paint from his own face. He didn’t really mind any of that, though. Though he couldn’t really pin point the cause, something in his life was making his head feel… full. An uncomfortable kind of full. Once he was cleaned, he went back into the living room, where Daichi and Karma were chatting. Well, Daichi wasn’t making much sense, but Karma was still nodding along.

“Oh yeah?” Karma asked seriously, when there was a pause in the babble.

Daichi stared him back just as intently, and then continued on. Listening in for a moment, Nagisa determined there were no actual words going on, not that he could make out anyway. Regardless, he probably thought he was making perfect sense. He turned around, seemingly noticing Nagisa’s presence, and continued to babble in like he was a part of the conversation.

Sitting down next to him, Nagisa joined in with the playing along like he could understand. At that point at least, Daichi had been dressed in his pyjamas, and after a few minutes his energy started to flag. Considering how covered in paint he’d been, Nagisa had to assume the finger painting had been pretty vigorous anyway, so it made sense.

“Are you still going tomorrow?” Karma asked after a while.

It took Nagisa a couple of seconds to register what he meant. “H-huh? Oh, yeah… Are you still not coming?”

Karma tilted his head back, looking up at the ceiling. “To spend the day with your parents? Nah. I have homework, anyway.”

He supposed he couldn’t blame Karma. Why _would_ he want to hang around with Nagisa’s parents? They seemed to get along well enough, but that was clearly out of necessity than any real desire to. His parents were busy on Daichi’s actual birthday anyway, so it wasn’t like he was missing anything important in not going.

With nothing much else to really talk about between them, the evening basically tapered out from there. Daichi was gone at that point, ready to be tucked in after everything. And then he and Karma went their separate ways, as had been the case recently. Nagisa tried to remain positive that it was just that they were both busy and tired, rather than any underlying issue between them. Still, he couldn’t help but miss just hanging out more.

The following morning, they remained the same. Karma really wasn’t kidding about the studying it seemed, deep in the zone. That was, the brief moment Nagisa even saw him. As always, he preferred to work in the silence of his own bedroom, and only Daichi was ever permitted to disturb that. So, Nagisa brushed it off, getting Daichi up and dressed by himself.

It was early, and they definitely didn’t need to rush. Still, Nagisa wasn’t even going straight to his parents. He knocked on Karma’s door out of courtesy, to let him know that they were in fact leaving the house, but he didn’t get much of a response. Nagisa wasn’t desperate to wait either, knowing how impatient Daichi was bound to get.

“Ready to go?” He asked with a slight sigh, making out to pick him up.

Daichi blinked up at him, realised the connection outstretched arms and restricted ability to move, and did his level best to run off in the opposite direction. Thankfully, it wasn’t like they were running late or anything, in fact they were early. Considering his options, Nagisa decided that fighting Daichi on this wasn’t really necessary.

“Nonononono,” Daichi was meanwhile babbling, wondering around hastily.

Nagisa crouched down to his level, still so that Daichi wouldn’t decide he wanted to play tag. “Do you want to walk?”

Slowly, from the chair he’d taken refuge behind, Dachi nodded. It took him a few moments, before he accepted that Nagisa wasn’t going to try and pick him up again. Finally, he came over, following Nagisa out of the front door. Then came the next challenge, the stairs. Since they lived in an apartment, Daichi hadn’t had much of that kind of climbing practise.

He looked up and Nagisa, and then the stairs, and then back to Nagisa, before stretching his arms up. Not wanting to spend an hour leaving the building, Nagisa happily obliged. He was apparently comfortable up there after everything, wrapping his arms securely round Nagisa’s neck, the few paces from the front door to the stairwell enough. Nagisa couldn’t help but notice Daichi had got a lot heavier than he used to be.

The walk to the park wasn’t far from there at least. Kunugigaoka was still cold, though not as bad as the evening before. Nagisa had always preferred the warmer weather, so it was hard he supposed not to feel a little bit down trodden before the turn of the seasons. Now that Daichi was old enough to really take it in, Nagisa wondered how he’d like spring.

“Nagisa kun!” A loud voice jolted him out of his thought.

“N-nakamura san!”

She grinned widely. “And Daichiisai! Aw, did you miss Auntie Rio? Come here.”

Daichi looked somewhat alarmed when Nakamura took him out of Nagisa’s hold, but he didn’t start crying surprisingly, nor did Nagisa stop her from doing it. He blinked up at her, breaking out into a full smile after he got used to being held by someone else. Though Nagisa was sure Nakamura didn’t hold many infants, she seemed comfortable enough supporting his weight.

“A-auntie?” Nagisa questioned aloud.

“A-a-“ Daichi tried to copy, before giving up. “Hiya!”

She rocked him a little, and then raised her pitch. “Aw, you’re so much bigger than I remember you! Isn’t that right? Huh? Did you grow?”

Honestly, he hadn’t pictured her to be big on baby talk, yet she continued to coo at him. Nagisa and Karma never really engaged in that kind of thing. Maybe it would have been different if he’d been doing it since Daichi was born, but back then it had seemed kind of silly, especially since he knew Daichi hadn’t been able to understand him. Switching now would be just as odd. Daichi seemed to understand him, anyway.

Nagisa laughed awkwardly a little. “How has school been for you, Nakamura san?”

Still looking at Daichi, she shrugged. “Passed first year with flying colours of course. None of it was as interesting as last year though.” She paused in her speech. “Has it already been a year?”

“Almost,” he swallowed. “It’s Daichi’s tomorrow, so.”

She rolled her eyes. “I knew that. I just didn’t bring it up in case my invite to the birthday party got lost in the mail.”

“B-birthday party?” Nagisa spluttered. “We’re not having one!”

Genuinely, Nakamura looked a little taken aback. “What do you mean, you’re not having one?”

“We thought about it,” he admitted, “but we decided there was no real point in an actual party. He doesn’t even know what a birthday _is_ , and it’s not like he’ll remember it.”

Her mouth fell open for just a second, just she snapped it closed again, instead wearing a slightly concerning smirk. She instead turned her attention back to Daichi, who honestly seemed pretty entertained by whatever she was saying to him. With no particular plans other than meeting each other, since they hadn’t in a while, they just walked through the park.

Honestly, Nagisa had forgotten how full on Nakamura could be sometimes. He found he was having a nice time catching up with her though. Everyone had been so busy that there hadn’t been that many meetups, Nagisa included. He even had their group chat on mute, only checking it on the rare occasions he remembered it. Everything was so normal nowadays that the events of last year were beginning to feel like nothing more than a bad dream.

Eventually, since they _were_ both very busy, Nakamura did have to return Daichi, and go off on her own way. Though Daichi didn’t really protest to being handed back over, he did look genuinely a little sad, waving at her as she walked off. He couldn’t deny that it was cute. Then again, a lot of the things Daichi did were cute.

Of course, as always, when he eventually got to his parents’ Daichi was immediately taken off him again. Nagisa tried his best not to care about how little acknowledgement he received from them, pushing it aside. It made sense anyway considering it was almost Daichi’s birthday, and it wasn’t like they got to see him that often. At least his father smiled at him and kept the door held open.

Nagisa didn’t know how to feel about where his relationship with his parents stood. By all means, it was better than how it used to be, or at least he thought so. Barely speaking felt better than the fear he used to be subjected to, anyway. Whether his mother had changed or not was a different question, but she certainly seemed to be less on the edge of some kind of break down. He was glad that his parents genuinely loved Daichi.

Now that they were inside, and he wasn’t limited to being carried, Daichi was pretty happy too. Not that there was much to do at his parent’s place. Nagisa probably should have had more foresight for that, but there wasn’t much he could do about it then. Well, Daichi had a tendency to ignore everything that was intended to be a toy, and instead play with things that were probably dangerous, so Nagisa was sure he could amuse himself.

They ended up sitting in the kitchen area, since his mother made some tea. As predicted, Daichi wandered around, checking out the unfamiliar surroundings. He seemed particularly confused by the traditional seating in the living room, since they had a proper sofa at home. Once he’d had enough of that, he ended up back at the table and was picked up by Nagisa’s father.

“I can’t believe he’s already one,” he commented, looking down at Daichi on his lap.

“Mmm,” Nagisa replied out of necessity, not wanting to think about it too much.

The day went by without fanfare after that, with little more to talk about. By the time Daichi got tired enough to need a nap, Nagisa decided to take the chance to leave. Again, Daichi didn’t complain when Nagisa elected to carry him, but didn’t actually fall asleep either, a somewhat impressive feat.

Of course, when they actually got home, and Nagisa let him down, he straight up passed out on the floor in the time it took him to take his coat off. The floor couldn’t possibly be the height of comfort. Maybe he should feel guilty about letting him sleep like that, though he was planning on putting him straight to bed

“Wear him out?”

Nagisa looked up, meeting Karma’s eyes. “I don’t know _how_.”

Honestly, Karma didn’t look that much better, a little hunched over with dark circles under his eyes. He didn’t show it anywhere else in his expression or demeanour though. He walked over confidently enough, scooping Daichi up in his arms. He didn’t stir, or anything. Was he getting enough sleep normally?

“Maybe he’s having that growth spurt,” Karma offered, as if he could hear Nagisa’s thoughts.

The doctor kept saying so. Every time Daichi had a check up, he declared that he’d grow _soon_. It had yet to actually happen. Daichi had been growing, and was definitely a lot bigger than he used to be, but the change had been incredible subtle. If anything, the change in Karma’s height had been more jarring recently. Nagisa found that he was craning his neck up more and more almost every day.

Karma put Daichi down for the nap he was taking properly, and then returned back to his room without saying much else. Whilst Nagisa wouldn’t have minded basically having their whole apartment to themselves, there wasn’t a whole lot to do. He didn’t have any real homework to do, so he invented extra studying until Daichi woke up again, though he wasn’t in a particularly boisterous mood.

Before he knew it, the day was over, and he was left to his own thoughts. Nagisa didn’t tend to look back on things too much, but it was surreal how this time a year ago he was suffering in hospital. It was a good thing you couldn’t remember pain, however even if it were possible, everything was still completely worth it. He tried to drown out the scarier thoughts of what was ahead.

He knew when he woke up the next morning that Daichi didn’t understand what the day was, or care about its significance, but that didn’t matter too much. As always, he was awake by the time Nagisa pulled himself out of bed, significantly in brighter spirits. So maybe on some subconscious level he did know.

“Happy birthday,” he said anyway, as Daichi looked at him funny.

It wasn’t that much of a treat, but Nagisa let him have an extra piece of fruit for breakfast, as well as some of the dreaded strawberry milk. He and Karma had had a long debate about whether drinking that stuff was alright or not, but it hasn’t seemed to have too much of a bad effect. Nagisa just didn’t want him developing a huge sweet tooth already. Internally he’d been referring to it for a while, but it was crazy that Daichi was now officially one year old.

Nagisa wasn’t in a particular mood to rush him, so he let the eating turn more into playing. It was still the usual kind of morning. What wasn’t usual, however, was Karma making an appearance. He even jolted at the unexpected sound of the door. Karma didn’t give him much in terms of acknowledgement, yawning his away across the apartment until he reached the coffee pot.

He just watched him do it, trying not to be grossed out when he poured his own carton of strawberry milk into the mug. “Happy birthday Daichan~”

Once again, Daichi mostly looked confused by the new word, though giggled somewhat.

Karma didn’t seem to mind that, ruffling his hair with one hand as he took a sip with the other. “He’s still so small.”

“Not as small as he was a year ago,” Nagisa commented, looking over at him.

He nodded slowly. “It was the first thing I thought when they handed him to you that first time. I didn’t get how you were so big yet Daichan was so _tiny_.”

It had been a lot, hadn’t it? Ignoring Karma’s slight insult. Of course, to this day, he still loved Daichi as much as he had that first moment he set eyes on him. It was just more manageable now, he’d adjusted to it, but back then it practically knocked him off his feet. Karma was right though, even know he was smaller than he probably should be, he was a proper little person now.

“He needed room to kick me,” Nagisa remembered.

Karma laughed a little under his breath, before straightening out, as if he wanted to say something. He didn’t get whatever it was out, though, because out of nowhere there was a knock on the door. They both looked at each other in question, as if either one of them was expecting a guess. When only silence followed, Nagisa slowly walked over to the door, curiously pulling it open.

“Surprise!”

Whatever he’d been expecting, it wasn’t several of his old classmates to be there. The last time this had happened, during his own birthday, he’d actually been expecting it. So the actual surprise made a little more sense in this context. Then again, Nagisa wasn’t quite sure what to say, but Nakamura’s wicked grin was enough to set the record straight. He wasn’t mad at her for organising whatever this was, he should have expected it really, but he was more dazed than anything.

“C-come in?” Nagisa got out.

Kayano waved a small flag, significantly more decorated than it had been for his own birthday.

“Sugaya couldn’t be here,” Nakamura explained, “but he wanted to help so he made the banners.”

Nagisa nodded very slowly at her words. When they all came in, Karma also gave them a nod of acknowledgement, just as confused as Nagisa was, though he didn’t wear it as obviously. Daichi just squealed, as if he actually sensed that all of these people were here for him.

“We’re not bothering you, right?” Sugino asked him lowly as the others moved in. “Nakamura just said she has this idea, and-“

“It’s okay,” Nagisa confirmed, “I need to actually get dressed though.

By the time everyone actually _got_ dressed, which was a challenge considering how interested Daichi was in the party, and how not interested he was in wearing clothes, it looked as if they’d been planning a party all along. Nakamura was right, Sugaya had done a pretty good job on the banners. Unused to seeing his home decorated so colourfully, Daichi seemed practically amazed.

Even if he didn’t know what a birthday was, he knew about toys, and it seemed like he was about to receive a lot of them. Nagisa couldn’t help but feel a slight shot of guilt when he realised everyone had bought a gift. Unfortunately, he knew first hand how costly any baby things could get. The idea of the others forking out a lot… He tried his best not to worry about it, as they sat around and waited for Daichi to open his gifts.

“You have to rip it,” Karma explained to him, out of the ear shot of most of their friends. Of course, he’d never really come across wrapping paper before. Karma demonstrated it a little, creating a small tear. Face shooting up with concentration, Daichi attempted to do the same, though his hands had to be guided a little.

Nagisa smiled. “That’s a good job.”

That was the point, apparently, when Daichi decided this new thing was extremely interesting. More interesting than any of the gifts underneath. Even when everything was open, and he was surrounded by more stuff than any one year old probably needed, he seemed content to just sit and shred the paper, occasionally crumpling it up into small misshapen balls.

Admittedly, it felt nice to have everyone over, enough so that he regretted not trying to organise something in the first place. Even if Daichi didn’t get what a birthday was by the time he turned two, they’d still definitely throw something, though that was still a very long way off. Weren’t babies supposed to turn into nightmares at that age? He dreaded it, though he couldn’t help but wonder if Daichi even counted as a baby now.

Unlike the days before, his energy levels remained consistent through to everyone leaving. Having been made the centre of attention by them all day, he genuinely seemed to pout as everyone filtered out of the door. His wave was practically pitiful. It was almost the school break, and Nagisa wished he could explain that Daichi would probably see them again soon.

“Say thank you,” Nagisa instructed softly. He didn’t expect much, but he figured it was good to introduce manners sooner rather than later.

His face creased up. “Tha-tha-Thank.”

It was close enough. Nagisa held him close, as he shut the door, and like that the energy disappeared. He supposed being engaged directly for so long must be tiring, not that they didn’t usually pay him attention. It wasn’t so bad, he could explore all his new things the next day. Daichi yawned onto his shoulder, burrowing his head. Nagisa internally took his earlier sentiment back. He was still definitely their baby. With the smile he displayed on his face, he was sure Karma was thinking the same thing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you all liked that! 
> 
> First of all, sorry for being gone so long. I honestly didn't intend a two month break, but a lot of things happened. On top of university work being... a lot (I spend most of my life ranting to myself in Japanese at this point it's awful) I've been going through some really sucky health issues. I somehow developed anemia which means I had zero energy, and I MEAN zero. My medication for that only just started to kick in, and then my dog passed away, so I had that to deal with. Basically, none of this has been great, but I'm here now! 
> 
> I hope this upload is proof I'm not forgetting about this story, though I'm not sure how quickly I can get the next chapter out. I hope it was worth the wait and the extra length makes up for it!


	56. Anniversary Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A year after Korosensei's death, 3E meet up to clean their old classroom

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nagisa and Karma play an intense game of hide and seek

It was hard not to feel sad and regretful. There were so many good things ahead, now that Nagisa had reached the end of his first year of high school. On the one hand, that meant there was going to be more work and studying. On the other, he was inching closer to his goals. He had to hope that this is what Korosensei would have wanted.

"Are you ready to go?"

Nagisa nodded slowly. "We're probably late already."

Looking more towards the door than his eyes, Karma swallowed. "Well, they're gonna be there all day."

He tried to take that in, but it was hard to not feel a little deflated. As much as Korosensei would have wanted them to be positive, it still stung. To the day, it had been exactly one year since his death, since they went from assassins to regular civilians. Something their class had mutually agreed was to honour his memory by keeping the classroom clean.

Nagisa was pretty sure some of his old classmates still did it regularly. Maybe out of habit, or maybe out of responsibility since they technically owned the place now. So it probably wouldn't be in much of a bad condition. No worse than it would be over the summer break maybe, though Nagisa knew for a fact Korosensei had kept it in pretty good shape back then too.

Sighing, he bent down. "What did I say about putting that in your mouth?"

Daichi, who had been on the floor the entire time, looked up, toy car between his lips.

"He acts like we don't feed him," Karma commented.

At the word, Daichi dropped it from his mouth. "Food?"

"No food yet," Nagisa said, picking him up. "We're going out."

Thankfully not starving, Daichi didn't seem to mind all that much. He did wiggle though, so Nagisa put him back down again. Immediately Nagisa regretted that decision, since Daichi took it as an opportunity to run around without an aim. Getting his shoes on him like that was a nightmare waiting to happen. Honestly, they'd considered not even taking Daichi, but in a weird way it felt almost wrong not to.

They did eventually get out of the door, with only a minor struggle and bribery. After that, the walk was pretty much silent, since neither of them were in the mood for much of a conversation. Despite his protests, Karma did elect to carry Daichi once they got to the actual mountain. Whilst they were barely phased by its dangers anymore, Daichi was still only one, and definitely didn't have the athletic ability yet.

He seemed captivated by the surroundings, which Nagisa supposed was fair considering he hadn't been to a new place in a while. Unfortunately, the excitement was almost too much, considering the way even Karma has struggling to hold him still. He didn't seem upset by the restriction though, busy lunging out in attempts to grab random parts of the forest.

A large group of their classmates were already there by the time they got to the actual class building. But then again, they were hardly early. Their ex classmates were already absorbed in their own things, it seemed, though Isogai shot him a wave and a bright smile when they came past. Given that he'd been their class rep, he was the one who actually held the key to the classroom.

"Hey guys," he greeted cheerfully. "Great to see you here! Some of us have already made a start but there's plenty to do!"

Nagisa smiled back politely. "Mm. Everyone seems pretty busy."

"And _Daichi_ ," he took a cautious step forwards. "He's so big now."

Daichi perked up at the mention of his name, scrabbling up across Karma's shoulder to try and judge his source. Thirteen months old now, he definitely had grown a lot from the baby he was when Isogai would have last seen him. Speaking of growing a lot, it looked like _everyone_ had. Everyone, it seemed, except Nagisa. Maybe getting pregnant had tricked his body into thinking it was fully grown or something, a cruel price for a high reward.

"Oh hey!" Maehara rushed over to join the exchange, dropping one of the wash buckets he was carrying. "Long time no see, huh? _Hi_ ," he bent down a little as if talking to Daichi, holding his hand out in a wave. Looking at him confused for a moment, Daichi clenched his fist and tried to meet him half way.

"He's trying to give you a fist bump," Nagisa explained. Or at least, he sincerely _hoped_ that was what Daichi was attempting, rather than an actual punch.

Maehara laughed, not really seeming to mind, when another voice called out. "Hey Maehara! Get back here!"

Looking over in the direction it was coming from, Nagisa couldn't see anyone, but he recognised Okano's voice. It was good to know everyone was still getting along, he supposed.

"Yeah! I guess I should run... You coming?" He looked over at Isogai.

Isogai smiled at Nagisa as he walked past. "See you round."

With that they were essentially left alone, with only background sounds of work to remind them they weren't. Nagisa took a tentative step forward, heading towards the class building, but Karma took advantage of his naturally bigger stride and crossed over in front of him, stopping in his path. There was definitely something off about his whole demeanour, Nagisa realised, remembering how he'd kept silent through that entire exchange.

"Uhm, Karma-"

He was cut off by their son being shoved into his arms. "You take Daichi today."

Nagisa blinked. "Where are _you_ going?"

Unsurprisingly, Nagisa didn't get a response. He turned over his shoulder, watching as Karma walked away off into the woods. Nothing had happened between them, had it? He retraced their journey in his head, trying to remember if something he'd said had upset him in some way... It all came up blank. Maybe it was just simply being here?

Whatever the case, Nagisa knew Karma pretty well at this point. And he knew when he needed to leave Karma alone. So instead of trying to follow after him, he continued the way he was originally headed, right into the classroom. Honestly, it was a good thing he had Daichi at his hip, because it was the only thing grounding him to the reality and that he wasn't back in 3E.

Nobody else was in the classroom, making it eerily silent. Nagisa couldn't help but be drawn to his old desk, slowly walking over to it. As he would have every morning, he turned and faced the front of the room, eyes fixed on the blackboard. He blinked, a flash of light obscuring his vision. For just a second, it was like a phantom had crossed into the room. Just as quickly as it appeared, it went again, clearly just a trick of the light.

" _Dada_ ," Daichi complained from his arms, jolting him out of his thoughts.

When Nagisa turned his head to look at him, Daichi was already smacking his mouth with his hand. "You want a snack?"

The only answer he got was a babble of something unrecognisable, which he took as a yes. With nowhere better to put him down, he sat Daichi on the chair, whilst simultaneously wiggling the bag from his shoulder. At this point, a bag of baby supplies was absolutely necessary whenever they went within a minute of their house. He hadn't learnt that the hard way yet, but he didn't want to. He fished a pretty generic bag of milk biscuits out, ripping it open. They were actually surprisingly good, in his opinion, though by the looks of things Daichi would probably finish them all.

He turned around, and paced over to the blackboard. It lacked the usual residue of chalk, suggesting that nobody had drawn on it for a while, but he decided it could probably use a good wipe down anyway. It seemed somebody had already left some cleaning supplies in the room, so he quickly got to work, checking regularly over his shoulder to make sure Daichi wasn't about to fall off the chair or choke on his food or anything.

It felt odd, standing in such a place. Although he'd stood right there and cleaned the blackboard many times, there was a different kind of air. He was in a different stage of his life, compared to being a middle school student. He felt the sudden and strong urge to keep his eyes set forwards, rather than behind him. That's how he'd gotten through his first year of high school, at least.

"I thought I might find you here."

Nagisa's head snapped towards the doorway, where Kayano was standing. "I-I'm surprised you made it."

She smiled widely. "I happened to be between projects right now."

Kayano was a lot different to how she'd been during their year as classmates. Although her personality hadn't shifted that much at first when her fake persona had been revealed, a year outside of their influence had left her feeling a little different. Nagisa had seen her a couple of times this past year, a month ago for Daichi's birthday, but it was rare that they had a full conversation. Somehow, right then, the shift felt more obvious. The energy surrounding her was more self assured, more grown up, though maybe that was also the change in her look.

"Is there going to be anything for us to see yet?" He questioned politely. Nagisa always kept an eye out for her stage name, but it seemed that nothing had been aired to the public.

She stepped over closer to him. "A few small roles I did should be airing soon! It takes a little while to get back into acting after such a long break," she grinned. "I already have a lot of offers on the table though, so, I have to trust I made the right choice!"

Nagisa nodded. "If it's what you were meant to do-"

"Then I should do it," Kayano completed, with a small sigh.

"Done!" A much higher pitched voice loudly proclaimed. "Dada, dada, dada, done!"

It was pretty normal for Daichi to get impatient when he felt ignored. Nagisa was happy he'd finished it all though, which meant his energy shouldn't turn into irritability, if he was lucky. Nagisa came over to him, taking the packet out of his hands. Of course Daichi had managed to get a beard of crumbs smudged around his chin, ready for Nagisa to wipe off. He included the hands for good measure, even though they were bound to get dirty again instantly. Not wanting to leave him like that, he set him down on the floor, pulling out a toy car from the bag to keep him somewhat occupied. It seemed he was more interested in doing his own thing right then, since he wasn't looking up at Nagisa in a pleading request to be played with.

"It's odd," Kayano stared out of the window.

"Hmm?"

She glanced around the room. "Standing here again."

Before Nagisa could answer her, his phone buzzed its notification sound. A part of him just wanted to ignore it. He probably should have just turned the device off anyway, before coming here, but it had slipped his mind. In case it was something important, though, Nagisa took a quick look at the screen. It only displayed the name and a small preview of the message. Glancing at it, it only seemed to be Rin, and nothing urgent. On a day like this, he figured it was better to just turn his phone off.

"Who's that?" Kayano questioned, possibly noticing the shift in his demeanour. He knew she wasn't purposely invading his privacy or anything, since she was standing in a position where she could easy see his phone screen, but the question made Nagisa jolt anyway.

He took a deep breath. "J-just my, uhm," he paused, flush building on his cheeks. For some reason, he couldn't quite spit it out.

Kayano's lips parted in what looked to be understanding. "I thought you and Karma were practically joined at the hip."

It had been a long time since their last proper conversation. The last time, he'd made an idiot of himself, going on and on about his feelings for Karma. Although they'd seen each other since then, he supposed there was no reason for her to assume anything had changed. A small part of Nagisa wondered if anything had changed.

"It was practically his idea," Nagisa mumbled, though he wasn't sure if she caught it or not. It was probably better if she didn't.

She hummed. "Are you happy like this?"

"I'm happy," he forced himself to say, afraid of what a more genuine answer would have been.

Taking a deep breath, a determined look crossed across her face. "I don't think you can fall out of love with somebody quickly. I-I think you can swallow it down a lot, but it takes a while to really let go of it."

Dread set over him. "So I should keep going?"

Maybe it was awful. Honestly, Nagisa wasn't sure how he felt about anything right now, and it was beginning to make him feel dizzy. It wasn't like months ago, before the new year, where he got this sort of uncontrollable buzz underneath his skin whenever Karma so much as looked at him. Perhaps subconsciously, he'd started to associate that with not being infatuated with him anymore, though there was something, like a churn in his stomach, that didn't feel quite complete about it. And Nagisa knew he _liked_ Rin, but he wasn't so far gone in lying to himself to pretend he loved him. But you weren't supposed to love somebody right away, as far as he knew. So Kayano was right, he needed to just keep going as he until the somewhat uncomfortable feeling he still had faded.

"That's not what I-" She didn't get to finish her sentence, a tiny weight barrelling into her leg. "Daichiisai!"

"You're still calling him that?" Nagisa half groaned, though he couldn't help but feel relieved that the subject had changed.

Daichi didn't seem to mind, pointing at the toy he was rolling around. "Car."

"Yeah!" Kayano bent down to play with him. "Do you like cars?"

"Big car," he giggled, pushing it towards her.

Nagisa was surprised at his apparent ability to string two words together, but he didn't express it. Instead, for just a little bit, he watched Kayano readily play cars with Daichi. Being an actress, she was pretty skilled in the art of playing her audience, and Daichi seemed overjoyed in the level of interest in something so small. Whilst they were doing that, he took his chance to start working on cleaning the rest of the classroom, something that was quite methodical.

As the day went by, his old classmates slowly flitted in. Most of the demanding maintenance had been outside, anyway, so they hadn't had much of a reason to come in before. Nagisa continued to clean around them, as a few gathered around. Some of them were just having conversations with each other, but quite a few joined whatever Kayano and Daichi were doing at that point. Honestly Nagisa would have expected Daichi to be a little more nervous with the group of practically strangers gathered around him, but he was just soaking up the attention.

The natural light began to fall eventually, by which point almost everyone was inside. Nagisa gave up cleaning, at that point, as the conversation became more communal as opposed to small groups. There was an odd air in the room, though, like they were dancing around the subject. Somehow, though, it didn't feel like a time to be sad.

"Hey," Maehara said, standing up from his chair. "Do you remember that time Korosensei was trying to show Okuda san that experiment, but some other chemical got knocked in?" He gestured towards the wall. "I can't believe there's still a scorch mark there."

Okuda flushed, but the rest of their class started to laugh. It had been pretty amusing, actually. One moment Korosensei had been calmly explaining a more advanced version of the lesson, and the next he was rushing around, sliming practically the whole classroom to contain the flame. It was a shame it was after they'd established the 'no assassination attempts in class' rule by then, because Nagisa was sure they could have had a good shot.

"Karma poured it in," Okuda said, her voice low.

Of _course_ he had. Okajima turned to look at him. "Hey, where is Karma?"

Apparently that was the cue for the rest of them to look expectedly at Nagisa. Like he actually was supposed to know. "H-he came with me," he said, "but I haven't seen him since this morning."

"I haven't seen him," Nakamura shrugged.

Nobody else pipped up to his whereabouts. Although Nagisa was absolutely certain that Karma could take care of himself, he couldn't help but feel a little worried, especially considering his mood earlier. Everyone else had returned inside... Perhaps Nagisa should just give him the space he so clearly wanted, but surely a whole day's worth was enough.

"I guess I could go look for him," he offered.

Nakamura jumped up. "We'll look after Daichan!"

"Will you." He deadpanned. Though, he supposed they'd practically been looking after him all day. Since Kayano had come in, he'd been changed and fed again properly, so it wasn't like he should be too much trouble. Given that they'd been out all day, he'd probably just fall asleep. _Surely_ he could trust them to not break a sleeping infant.

"It's probably a little rough out on the mountains," Isogai offered.

Nagisa felt the tension drop from his shoulders, and sighed. With everyone looking over at him expectantly, he kissed Daichi on the forehead, and then set off. Where would Karma even go, anyway? Definitely not all the way back home, or so he hoped. Unfortunately, Karma had a lot of prime places mapped out of this forest, and Nagisa had yet to find them all.

At first he followed the route they'd taken when infiltrating the army, back on that night a year ago now. He had to assume that logically Karma would have chosen the route most familiar to him for himself back then, which would make it a familiar place to hide in now. Still, so signs of him anywhere. Nagisa almost considered climbing a tree for better vantage, but he didn't think it would get him very far. Karma was smart for sure, but he wasn't extremely stealthy.

Next Nagisa checked the ravine like formation, following the same logic. Karasuma had trained them a lot there, so it still qualified as familiar. Once again, he couldn't see any signs of Karma. Nagisa paused, then, at the bottom of it. Of course he'd checked around the classroom first, and he hadn't been their either, so where else?

He ended up following the river downstream, and then there he was. It was almost fully dark by then, but Karma's red hair still stuck out like a flame. Though it was subtle, he saw the way Karma's form tensed up, almost at the same moment Nagisa laid eyes on him. He must have heard the footsteps, then, so there was no point in Nagisa trying to sneak up on him. Instead, he approached casually.

"Hey," Nagisa said, sitting down beside him, legs dangling over the cliff face where half their ex classmates had almost been thrown off.

Karma didn't say or do anything to acknowledge him.

"It's c-"

"Don't." He said, tone sharp with ice.

On an ordinary day, Nagisa probably would have left it at that, but he felt compelled somehow to not take that for an answer. He felt an almost kind of rage spiral up inside him. Everyone else was sitting inside and respecting Korosensei's memory, not off sulking somewhere alone. Hadn't they grown out of this kind of thing?

"You should come back," he tried to say, firmer.

Karma laughed without any obvious humour. "And why would I do that, _Nagisa_?"

"Because," he protested, "I know that you're upset," he sped up before Karma could cut him off to deny that, "but I don't think this is what Korosensei would have wanted. Maybe it's not fair-"

Without warning, Karma jumped up, as if he was about to stalk off again. He seemed to change his mind though, mid stride. "Nothing about anything is fair."

"Oh," Nagisa produced the sound, without registering it leaving his lips.

He turned to face Nagisa, though something about it seemed less on edge. "I just can't get over it," he finally admitted. "I think it was right... the ending, that is. But the way it happened?" Karma almost shuddered. "It feels like chaining an animal up for slaughter when I replay it in my head. There's not a lot to celebrate about that."

That's what this was about. "No it wasn't ideal," Nagisa got to his own feet. "But I don't think that's what mattered. Maybe Korosensei was trapped, and maybe it wasn't a typical assassination since he kind of... chose it, but... Wasn't that kind of the point? All year, we were trapped in a bad situation, but we made the best of it, like Korosensei taught us. We still assassinated him together after all, and I like to think he was proud of us for that."

"You think so?"

Nagisa couldn't help himself. He strode forward, going up on the balls of his feet to wrap his arms around Karma as best he could. Since embracing his neck would probably just be uncomfortable for them both, he instead wrapped his arms around his middle, burying his head against Karma's chest. For a moment, Karma remained completely still, but relaxed into it, and then hugged Nagisa back. His eyes weren't wet against Nagisa's shoulder, but it was as close to crying as Nagisa thought he'd get.

"No," he stumbled back, pushing Nagisa away from him all of a sudden, a real kind of panicked look in his eye. "You can't do that."

He stared up at Karma. "D-do what?"

Karma's face morphed, and then like a quick shudder again it completely neutralised. "So. Let's go back to class."

Now Nagisa was even more concerned. What was going on with him? "Wait-"

But he was already walking. "You found me, didn't you? _Fine._ I'll come and sit with you and _chit chat_ like you want. Is that enough?"

He wasn't fine, and it wasn't enough, and Nagisa realised with an amount of horror that there wasn't a whole lot he could do about it. So he steeled his shaking limbs, and just followed Karma back. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope the formats not weird! Ao3 wasn't working so I had to copy and paste off wattpad and post this on my phone. 
> 
> I'm still ill and have a Japanese exam on monday but I'm hanging in there. 
> 
> Hope you all enjoyed!


	57. (Other) Fight Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nagisa's regular preheat makes him feel ill

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I truly am back from the dead wow look at his

He was already feeling it. Nagisa hated being an omega. With every core of his being, right then, he knew his life was simply _unfair_. A part of him just wanted to go to the school infirmary and be allowed home for the rest of the day, but that would just draw attention to himself. At least his heat cycle was regular. Some omegas, he knew having seen for himself, just went into heat without warning sometimes, so at least he had that.

If only he didn’t want to rip the clothes from his body. An electric buzz, and not a pleasant one, was rushing under the surface of his skin. It wasn’t itchy in the traditional sense, but that was the closest way to describe the heat building there. Everything was so sensitive that the brush of fabric against his skin was maddening. But there wasn’t a lot he could do about it, in the restricting school uniform.

“Aren’t you gonna eat that?” Higashi gestured his lunch.

Weakly, Nagisa shook his head. Though his closest friends knew _he_ was an omega, they were all betas themselves. It would be hard to get them to relate to how sickening heat could get, even when you were expecting it. He supposed maybe the symptoms were coming on a little fast, since he was already feeling nauseous, but he didn’t think he was in any danger.

Higashi just shrugged, taking it to eat for herself. Since they’d started their second year of high school, things had been a little different. Kita and Nishi were dating pretty openly now, and had a natural priority for each other. Whilst that normally would have been fine, Minami tended to socialise his way around the room, rather than sticking with just them. So, not wanting to leave Higashi in an awkward position as third wheel, he’d decided to try and spend more time with his friends, rather rushing off to Rin every lunch break. 

Not that he was avoiding Rin. After thinking long and hard about it during their school break, he’d figured out what he had to do. Mostly, that involved swallowing his fears. How could he expect to love somebody if he didn’t really try to? Speaking of which, Nagisa probably should try and find him. They didn’t have any plans after classes ended, so looking for him _then_ was a terrible idea. And Nagisa at least wanted to explain why he’d be missing the next two days of school.

First, though, he excused himself from the classroom to the tiny omega bathrooms. At least Nagisa had enough forethought to bring heat scent blocker with him, just in case. Early preheat wasn’t so bad in terms of scent if nobody came too close to him, but there was always the risk that a sharp nosed alpha could pick it up in passing. Easier to just dab a little on like cologne, than experience that.

Nobody gave him a second look on the way to Rin’s classroom. He always hated popping his nose in there, but he steeled himself to do it, slowly poking his head around the door. Thankfully, Rin sat just two desks away from the exit, so it didn’t take a lot for Nagisa to get noticed. Unfortunately, when Rin stood up out of nowhere, a bunch of eyes set upon him. They didn’t really hang around with Rin’s friends that much, so Nagisa was pretty sure they only really thought of him as ‘Rin’s boyfriend’. He cringed, trying to ignore the boisterous teasing noises they were serenaded with.

Still, he slid out of the room quickly, without answering any of their questions. “Hey!”

“C-can we go somewhere?” He finally got out, realising there was no good way to say it.

Rin didn’t really seem to mind the odd question. “Sure.”

Nagisa was happy to let him lead the way. Even after over a year of attending it, their high school was still pretty big. He still didn’t know every inch of it, or which rooms would be free. They ended up going up a few floors, and into what seemed to be an empty art room. He wondered what the danger of somebody walking in there was, but Rin closed the door behind them, giving at least a slight sensation of privacy.

“First,” he said, and before Nagisa could ask what he meant, he cupped his cheeks and pressed a kiss to his lips. Thankfully he didn’t make it very deep, and Nagisa was able to disguise his discomfort until he pulled away. His skin was far too sensitive to be touched, even in a gentle way like that.

Nagisa managed a weak smile, and stepped away. “Uhm, tomorrow-“

He looked like he’d just caught a beam of sunlight. “Oh, so you heard? I’m kind of nervous honestly.”

That… in wasn’t what he’d meant. “Is something happening?”

Rin blinked, clearly surprised that Nagisa _hadn’t_ heard whatever it was about. “They chose me to open the festival tomorrow!”

“That’s great,” Nagisa tried to say with as much enthusiasm possible, which was a hard task honestly. It was almost impossible to feel anything other than discomfort and irritation with the state he was in. Still, it was a good thing for him. Since Rin was president of his own class this year, he was going to naturally be in the running for jobs like that. Nagisa had been planning on missing the entire festival already, though.

His grin spread wider. “I don’t know where your class is going to be, but you’ll try and come, right?”

“O-oh,” Nagisa looked down. “That’s what I wanted to tell you. I can’t go to the festival.”

Rin took a step back, but he looked more confused rather than upset. “How come?”

This was a conversation Nagisa had been dreading for a while. “Omega things,” he said in one, hurried breath, hoping that he wouldn’t dwell on it too long.

It took Rin a second. “ _Oh_ , is it your-“

“Yes,” Nagisa cut him off, not able to force himself to look at him.

A really uncomfortable silence filled the room. But there wasn’t a lot else Nagisa could say to make it better. He’d known it would be something they’d have to deal with eventually, but not how to go about that. Maybe he should have looked it up or something, but it was too late for that. Now all he could do was hope that Rin would excuse himself and ask no further questions.

Rin swallowed. “Do you want… help?”

That wasn’t what Nagisa had been expecting to hear.

“E-eh _what_?” Nagisa felt all the blood rush to his head. A small voice told him that logically he shouldn’t be making assumptions. Aside from offering to share his heat, there were many things he could potentially help with. Maybe it was just a gut feeling, that he knew exactly what Rin actually meant. It could just be the preheat, but he began to feel just a little bit more nauseous. He hadn’t even considered _that_ kind of thing.

“That’s not weird is it?” Rin tilted his head. “Most people help their omega’s when they go into heat. Isn’t it just the right thing to do?”

“But-“

He sighed, then, like Nagisa just didn’t understand him. “I just don’t want you to be hurting,” he paused, and then softened. “Besides, hey, Nagichan, who’s going to protect you?”

Nagisa forced himself to quell the rage that burned just below the surface. He knew what Rin _meant_ , he did, but he didn’t need protection as if he were helpless prey. If Rin weren’t a beta, maybe Nagisa could have brushed that off as something instinctual, but there was a real seriousness in his tone. Yes, it was dangerous for an omega to just wander about as normal during a heat, if he could even manage that in the first place, but that was hardly what he was doing.

“I can look after myself,” he said, more like he was biting the words out of him.

Rin came closer, practically shielding him with his arms. “It’s not that I don’t think that. But there’s other things, like making sure you eat and drink. You shouldn’t go through that alone.”

Who made _him_ such an expert? “I won’t be completely alone.”

He dropped Nagisa as if he was being burnt. “You’re staying at home?”

“Yes?”

It hadn’t been the right thing to say, he realised. Rin went very quiet for a moment, but it was a different kind of silence. After a few seconds, Nagisa realised it was anger, and automatically braced himself for whatever was about to come. He’d never seen Rin angry before.

“At home with your _alpha ex boyfriend_?” There was something wild in his eyes. “Just so I can get that straight.”

Nagisa felt his body start to shake. “It’s not like that.”

He glared. “What else is it like?”

“I can’t just make him move out every time this happens,” Nagisa all but whimpered.

Rin knew about their entire messy situation. Well, maybe not _all_ of it, but the parts that were important. At least, Rin knew enough that he and Karma weren’t a thing, and the only reason they lived together was out of mutual convenience. If he was that uncomfortable with it, then he should have brought this up _months_ ago.

“Yeah, but it’s hardly,” he took a deep breath, “I guess the right word would be _appropriate_.”

If Nagisa had been less on edge, he would have kept his mouth shut. But it came tumbling out of him. “You don’t trust me?”

“Heat is different,” Rin said firmly. “It’s a disaster waiting to happen.”

“Nothing’s happened,” Nagisa stated, annoyed now that Rin assumed to know exactly how heats went. “We’ve been through this a few times now, and everything was fine.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Something clearly _did_ happen, or you wouldn’t have a child.”

Nagisa’s jaw dropped. He knew that he was angry and confused, but his mind went otherwise completely blank. Stunned out of possible things to say. Had Rin been thinking like that for a while, and finally let it out? Or was it just his own imagination running wild? Whatever the case, there was nothing Nagisa could say, he didn’t think.

“R-rin, I-“

The bell signalling the end of the lunch break sounded out. Not even hesitating, Rin shot him a pointed look, and then exited the room as swiftly as he physically could. Nagisa just stood there for a few minutes, blinking in silence, as if he expected Rin to just come back and say it was a practical joke. He knew he couldn’t stay there forever, though, so he eventually lost that hope and returned to his classroom.

The rest of his lessons dragged, as the preheat became steadily worse. He couldn’t really fixate on the whole Rin situation, not with the sweat building under his skin. If that had been their first fight, then he’d have to deal with it later. Right then, all he could think about was getting home and stripping off his torturous clothes. The second the day ended, in fact, he was up and out of his seat without saying goodbye to anybody.

By the time he was on the train, the pace of which he couldn’t control, Nagisa was out of breath. In his rush to get home, he’d started to sweat even more, breaking down the heat scent blocker faster than Nagisa was comfortable with. He didn’t feel like he was in any real danger, but he couldn’t miss people glancing at him in question. There would still be a few hours before he _really_ smelt of heat, at least.

He made it home before that happened. He’d agreed with Karma a few days ago that he wouldn’t pick Daichi up this week, just in case he did have to come home early. Usually, he’d at least announce he was back, but Nagisa was more than happy to just disappear to his room and hide there for the next few days. It didn’t help that the atmosphere between him and Karma was still rough. Civil enough to carry a conversation for sure, but there was always a subtle edge to it whenever they were in the same room. And their apartment wasn’t particularly big. He just had to hope Karma was studying alone in his room as he usually did.

That wasn’t the case, unfortunately. And it only took Karma a few seconds. “Are you gonna want dinner?”

It made sense that he’d be able to tell, since they were so close all the time. From Nagisa’s perspective, too, he barely even noticed Karma’s scent unless he was really up close, since he was used to it. He supposed that if that suddenly changed, he’d pick it up immediately too. The last shreds of the blocker were basically gone.

“No, thank you,” he said weakly.

“Are your scent blockers up?” Karma asked seriously.

They’d been a necessary investment. In addition to spray you could wear on your body, there was also a kind of air con like device which could be attached to the wall in any room, turned on and off whenever needed. Nagisa usually turned it on a couple of days before he expected a heat, so it had been neutralising his scent for a while already. It meant that he wasn’t as comfortable during it, but it was a compromise he was willing to make.

Nagisa nodded instead of speaking up, suddenly feeling a little dizzy. Perhaps any other time, he’d let himself indulge just a little in the scent of alpha, but that was _exactly_ what he insisted to Rin he wouldn’t do. So Nagisa instead tried to concentrate on not standing any closer to Karma, which was hard due to his biological programming. Emotional cheating still felt like cheating.

Karma’s hands suddenly clasped his shoulders, which was painful in hypersensitivity. “You’re shaking.”

“O-oh.”

The serious look seemed odd on Karma’s face. “You should go to your room.”

His room? Yes, that sounded good. Nagisa winced, after Karma let him go. His arms were truly bothering him then, so Nagisa lost his train of thought, pulling his school uniform off right then and there. He whimpered as he did so, but once his top half was free, he felt a little bit of relief. Preheat was _painful_ , so he didn’t think the good feeling would last long.

“D-“ Karma swallowed. “Do you want me to speed it up?”

Yes, they’d done that before. Nagisa wasn’t sure exactly how long his preheat would ordinarily last, but he was very much aware that being around Karma made the entire process quicker. It was nothing quite like the first time, Nagisa didn’t even want to _think_ about that, but every other time he’d been in heat since then, he’d made peace with some light scenting. After directly breathing in alpha scent for a few minutes, his heat seemed to come on furiously within the hour. But that felt wrong given his earlier argument, too.

“No, thank you,” he got out.  

Nagisa wasn’t sure how he was going to go through this, as he was, completely alone this time. He’d known he’d probably have to cope with his heats completely alone one day, but he didn’t feel completely ready for it to be right then. Karma would probably still bring him water, he hoped. That couldn’t be considered wrong, could it?

He was forgetting something. “Uhm, Daichi-“

Karma raised an eyebrow. “Oh, he _needed_ a nap. I have no idea what they do to him there, but he was knocked out.”

That soothed him for a moment, bringing an element of calm to his frantic mood. As soon as he’d felt that, though, his stomach began to churn. He lurched forward a little with it, automatically feeling faint, as his body went about the sickly procedure of making slick. Although he was mostly expressionless, Nagisa knew Karma’s subtle moods. He could see the way his jaw clenched, his nose kind of scrunched. Nagisa understood why, it felt as gross as it probably smelt, so he took it as his cue to leave.

He sidestepped around Karma, and closed the door to his bedroom behind him. Though he wasn’t on the edge of full heat, he knew it was close. Stripping the rest of his clothes off haphazardly, he clambered onto his bed. It would be hard, but he knew it would be best if he tried to get some sleep. Waking up mindless and in heat would be easier, or so he thought. Nagisa shut his eyes, trying his best to erase any thoughts of any alphas from his head.

\---

It didn’t matter that Nagisa wasn’t in the room with him anymore, the traces of omega preheat still lingered and it was turning Karma insane. Maybe it was a good thing that Nagisa hadn’t let him scent him… Karma still could have detached himself, he was certain, but he’d be a hell of a lot more frustrated. He was supposed to be banishing thoughts of Nagisa, anyway.

Maybe it was just easier to be mad at Nagisa, than mad at himself. A part of him thought that he must be mistaking his feelings. Karma wasn’t sure, but love was supposed to involve wanting to see the other person happy. By all appearances, Nagisa was over the moon, but Karma got no enjoyment out of it. No, he only felt kind of bitter. So that feeling, just _wanting_ Nagisa, rather than loving him, should have been easy to fix. But, well, Karma wasn’t good at letting things go.

Thankfully, for his own sanity, it wasn’t long until Daichi woke up again, which made Karma feel significantly less alone in his own thoughts. It was pretty easy to tell he was awake, anyway, because recently he made it very obvious when he was bored, and there wasn’t a lot Daichi could entertain himself with from his crib.

In fact, when Karma went into his room, he was already trying his level best to climb out of it.

“Papa!” He gave up at that, apparently content to just let Karma do the hard work for him.

Karma regarded him for a moment. “Hungry?”

His face screwed up as though he was really thinking long and hard about it. Karma couldn’t help but snort at him, because it _really_ wasn’t a big decision. Then again, maybe he’d been so tired he wouldn’t remember that he hadn’t eaten anything since they got home. Apparently he had a moment of clarity, because he nodded very vigorously.

Karma sighed, bending down to pick him up. “Any requests?” He didn’t get a response. “How about… green peppers?”

He wished he had a camera, because the look of pure horror that came across Daichi’s face was hilarious. “No! Yucky!” For extra measure, he tried pounding his fists against Karma’s shoulder. “No!”

“Relax Daichan,” Karma laughed, “you know I wouldn’t do that to you.”

He whimpered, as though he didn’t really trust him. Honestly, Karma wasn’t in the mood to make him anything complicated, probably just a smaller version of whatever he was making for himself. He settled on yakisoba, since it would only take a few minutes to make. Though he put Daichi down when he got into the kitchen area, he didn’t rush off to play by himself.

“Help Papa,” Daichi said firmly.

He’d learnt that word recently, Karma thought. At least, he’d started to notice it. Maybe because Nagisa was always yelling at _him_ , ‘Karma do this’, ‘Karma help me with that’ (well, maybe not always, but way more than Karma ideally _wanted_ ). So of course Daichi had picked it up. There wasn’t a lot he could really do, since Nagisa would probably murder him for letting their son too close to knives or flames.

Karma thought about it for a moment, and chopped up one of the vegetables, his practised hand making quick work of it. “Hmmm, can you throw this in the bin?”

When handed the scrap parts, Daichi clenched his first firmly, and seemed completely intent on doing the best job he could. They went on like that, with Karma giving him tiny tasks, and Daichi taking great pride in carrying them out. He rewarded him being omitting green peppers (Karma wasn’t the biggest fan of them either), and a carton of strawberry milk.

It seemed like Daichi was in a kind of clingy mood that day, because he stuck at Karma’s side without seeming at all bothered. He decided to skip out on studying, at least for one day, mostly out of feeling bad about it. Even with the nap, though, Daichi seemed pretty tuckered out. They ended up watching some sort of animated movie on his bed, though Karma wasn’t really paying attention to it. There was something or other about a talking cat, but Daichi seemed to understand it more. Karma really couldn’t be blamed for dropping off too, once Daichi gave up on trying to keep his eyes open. He dreamt about cats, funnily enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you all enjoyed this one! 
> 
> Look they're fighting! 
> 
> Look cute baby! 
> 
> As always, all comments and feedback are much appreciated. Don't forget to like and subscribe if you enjoyed this video! Ding the notification bell to never miss an update! Use code James for 10% off your purchase!


	58. Reveal TIme

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Higashi has to come over for a history project

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you'll love and hate this update

“Can anybody tell me why the lord only took male omegas as concubines?”

It was a long, _long_ lesson. It wasn’t that Nagisa disliked history, or his teacher, but this particular subject was uncomfortable. Of course, most people had learnt about the different genders back in the mandatory middle school health classes, and then seemed to have forgotten it all. Nagisa had never really noticed it come up in school, since then, but this particular lesson seemed to be focused on a situation involving omegas.

Which meant that everyone in the class turned towards him, as if he’d know the answer.

“They can’t get pregnant!” Someone stuck their hand up earnestly.

Nagisa nearly choked on air. Was that what people generally thought? Or maybe they were right, and he was some kind of medical miracle. Though he didn’t remember anybody telling him anything like that. Of course, Nagisa wasn’t about to stand up and inform his teacher that he was wrong. Perhaps his life would have been a little simpler, if that were the case.”

“Mm,” their teacher said, “very good. As you should all know, a male displaying omega characteristics is considered a genetic dysfunction. Whilst it may be technically possible, in practise, I believe it’s too hard for the body to contain.” He paused, and glanced around the room. “But this isn’t a science lesson. So, as you know, marriage to a beta woman was highly controversial. At the time, it was generally accepted that it wasn’t enough for an alpha. But, omega women are far too fertile, leaving the one solution- “ He sighed, cut off by the school bell. “Remember to pair up and finish this section together.”

As usual, they stood up as their teacher left, and the second he was out of the door, normal conversation picked up around the room. Nagisa felt the tension drop from his shoulders, far less on display than he had been before. Honestly, he’d mostly been zoning out for that entire lesson, which seemed far better than fully listening to it.

Higashi didn’t waste any time tapping him on the shoulder. “Let’s work together!”

“Hey, no fair,” Minami complained. “You don’t just get to claim Nagisa kun for the one project ever on male omegas.” 

“T-that doesn’t mean I know about it!” Nagisa felt the need to state, because that hadn’t crossed his mind lately.

Shooting a look at Minami, Higashi shrugged. “No, but you get better grades than I do in history.”

Nagisa looked down at his notebook. “O-okay then.”

“Great! Should I come over to yours this weekend?”

“Wait!” Nagisa realised exactly why that couldn’t happen. “Can’t we just… do it at your house?”

Higashi looked at him curiously. “Not right now. My parents are away this weekend and wouldn’t let me have someone over. Besides, they’re redoing the kitchen, so the whole place is a _mess_.”

“The library then!” It was the last option he could think of.

“What are you hiding.”

He hadn’t exactly told his friends everything yet. It hadn’t been _necessary_. The only reason he’d told Rin is because he would have felt awful hiding such a huge part of his life, but friends weren’t supposed to know _everything_ about each other. Nagisa didn’t know what to do. The more excuses he made, the more Higashi of all people would grow suspicious. And who _knew_ what she might uncover when she really went looking. Also, a part of him wanted to squash that Yakuza rumour completely.

He accepted his fate. “I’ll see you tomorrow, then.”

“Great,” she grinned. “Oh, Chou chan! Are you coming with me tonight?”

“Huh?” Kita looked up, but then nodded. “Mmm.”

That was Nagisa’s signal to escape. He pushed all of his books into his bag, and quickly swung it over his shoulder. There was a lot of work to be done that weekend, and Nagisa would rather get it out of the way as quickly as possible. He had to get out quickly anyway. It seemed like Daichi was finally realising what was happening, rather than accepting just being put in the care of others. He had apparently got the memo that he was being _left_ , and didn’t seem to like it. So, Nagisa felt bad.

He was caught before he could get out of the classroom, however. “Nagisa!”

Nagisa jolted, and then remembered to scoot out of the way of the door so he wouldn’t be blocking the other students. “H-hello.”

The last month had been… odd. Their ‘fight’ had been weeks ago now, and Rin seemed to want to act like it hadn’t happened. At first, Nagisa felt like maybe they should have at least discussed it a little, and apologised and moved on, but too much time had passed now for him to bring it up. Regardless of just ignoring it, apparently, there seemed to be a weird edge to their interactions.

“Can we talk?” He looked nervous.

Nagisa was almost about to say yes, when he remembered. But he didn’t want to just ignore him. “I can’t miss my train...”

Rin took a deep breath. “I’ll walk with you.”

He couldn’t help but brace himself. It sounded like he was about to face a serious conversation, and honestly he wasn’t so sure how that was going to go. It still felt like there was a heavy tension between them, like a wall blocking their bodies. Rin kept pace beside him, though he was completely silent as they made their way out of the school building. He wasn’t taking Nagisa off anywhere private though, it seemed, so it couldn’t be _that_ serious.

“What did you want to talk about?” Nagisa asked, when he couldn’t stand the silence for much longer.

Rin inhaled sharply. “It’s going to be summer before we even know it, right?”

He had a point. It was as if spring had passed in the blink of an eye, almost escaping him entirely. Already, the air was beginning to get warmer again, and the school work load was increasing. A part of Nagisa wished everything would slow down, but mostly he just had his eyes ahead. He almost wanted it to be the future, already.

“It’s getting to the time where I have to be really serious about where I apply for university,” Rin continued, when Nagisa didn’t respond to him. “And I’m not sure where to go.”

Nagisa considered him for a moment. “There’s a lot of places you could take economics. And you get good grades.”

“Mmm,” he agreed. “I was actually thinking of staying at Keisetsu.”

 _That_ was completely new. “I-I thought you really wanted Kyuushu.”

He sighed. “It’s just so far away. I don’t know anybody in Kyuushu. At least here, I know the place, and I already have friends…”

For some reason, Nagisa had a really bad feeling about that. Though they hadn’t spent a ton of time talking about it, even from the start Rin had seemed set on where he wanted to go for university. It was pretty out of the blue, for him to just change his mind like this. How long exactly had this been plaguing him?

“Didn’t you say most of your friends weren’t staying?” Nagisa remembered.

Rin looked down at him. “Well, _you’re_ still here.”

“O-oh,” Nagisa wasn’t immediately sure why, but that made him feel really uncomfortable. He didn’t want Rin sacrificing anything for him. They hadn’t even been dating for that long anyway, not long enough for the path of his life to be altered.

“I thought you’d be happy,” he said.

Honestly, Nagisa didn’t know _what_ to say to him. “I want _you_ to be happy.”

Rin seemed to slow his face. “You don’t think I would be?”

“I think,” he paused, “I think you’d come to regret it.”

He stopped completely. “I get it.”

Nagisa could practically taste the tension in the air. “Get it?”

“You want space,” he shrugged. “You’ve barely spoken to me recently, so I should have expected it.”

“That’s not it!” Nagisa insisted. “I just don’t think you should change all your plans just because of me.”

“It’s not just for you!”

At that, Nagisa began to doubt himself. Was he just being big headed somehow, thinking everything was about him? But Rin hadn’t listed any other reasons… Nagisa hadn’t actually thought about what was going to happen next year, in the slightest. Maybe under difference circumstances, Nagisa would have been complimented that Rin cared for him so much. Yet right then, Nagisa just felt trapped.

 “You’re going to miss your train,” he said finally.

“Rin, I-“

“Just go.”

Nagisa didn’t feel like sticking around and arguing, even if he didn’t have to get home. He had a strong suspicion that this had been building up for a while. The thing was, Nagisa really didn’t want to fight. It felt like Rin had been at least somewhat mad at him for almost a month, rather than actually wanting to forget about their initial argument.

Once he was on the train, he did _his_ best to forget about it. There were more immediate issues. Like tomorrow, for example. He had no idea what he was going to tell Higashi. Even though it was a weekend, Nagisa highly doubted Karma would be willing to take Daichi out for a whole day, so it seemed that the truth was about to be forced out. Maybe it was about time.

It wasn’t that he was desperate to hide the truth away, it just felt like it was too late to suddenly announce the existence of his son. His son who currently looked pretty happy to see him, rather than still upset at being left. Whenever Nagisa actually got to the nursery, he ran straight into his arms, and today was no exception. No, Nagisa wouldn’t ever purposely hide this.

“Dada!” Daichi exclaimed, when Nagisa picked him up.

He was getting so heavy. “Did you have a good day?”

His brow seemed to crease for a moment. “Budderfry,” he pointed.

It really wasn’t what Nagisa had asked him, but apparently that was important. “Yes,” he looked at the mural that was painted on the wall, “that’s a _butterfly_. Want to go look at it?”

Daichi shook his head. “Down.”

Honestly, Nagisa wondered how much longer Daichi was going to let him pick him up at _all_. He started wiggling, and Nagisa decided not to force him. Though, once he was on the ground, he didn’t go running off, instead practically hugging Nagisa’s leg. Knowing he’d be able to keep up, Nagisa began to take short paces, towards the exit. Daichi seemed to get the message, trailing along behind him.

Once the outside air hit him, he seemed to pick up that they were actually going home. He sped up, almost tripping over his own feet in efforts to walk in front of Nagisa. Not that he knew the way, or at least Nagisa was pretty sure he didn’t. He wasn’t about to test it. In fact, Daichi seemed to have picked up the pace, and was about to run straight into the road if Nagisa wasn’t careful. He had enough trained reaction speed to lunge forward and grab him by the shoulders, electing to hold him by the wrist the rest of the way back.

Apparently he really was in an independent mood, because he was running in circles the second Nagisa let him go to unlock the building door. When it _was_ open, he barrelled straight inside, right up to the stairs. Nagisa was about ready to collapse into bed, so he walked over, ready to carry Daichi to their apartment. The second Daichi saw his outstretched hands, he dodged, dashing to the other side one the lobby. Once he felt safe, it was clear he knew what he was doing, because he started giggling about it.  

“Alright, go on then,” Nagisa said softly. Honestly, Daichi never really got to practise climbing things, so it would probably be good for him. However slow that process was turning out to be. Although he was tired, Nagisa didn’t want to rush him, so he stayed patiently behind, just in case Daichi decided to give up and lean backwards. “Good job,” he said, when they finally reached the top. It was the moment Daichi decided that he wanted to be carried again, reaching up as if he hadn’t been running away for the last hour.

Nagisa couldn’t help but remind himself that there would be a day where Daichi wouldn’t need him at all. Even now, running around and wanting to do everything for himself, it was so far from the helpless new born he was almost a year and a half ago. It was odd that he almost missed it. Even now, though, Daichi still nuzzled up to him (when he _allowed_ Nagisa to hold him) in the same. Maybe that wouldn’t change.

“We’re back,” he said, carefully kicking off his shoes. Even though he was still holding Daichi, he used his co-ordination skills to work his shoes off too, along with his coat. Throughout this, Daichi stayed mostly still, burrowing his head into Nagisa’s shoulder. Any longer, and he’d fall asleep like that. Whilst that might sound like a good idea, Nagisa didn’t want him waking up in the middle of the night demanding food. No, instead, he just placed him down in the high chair.

It must have been a busy day for everyone, because Karma came out in the middle of a yawn. “Hey.”

Nagisa felt his shoulders relax. “Are you making dinner?”

Apparently, that was the cue for the door buzzer to sound. “Well, it just arrived.”

“Delivery?” Nagisa looked in the direction of the door. “Really?” Although he definitely qualified as lazy, Karma tended to be pretty mindful of what he ate, and it was rarely junk food.

“It’s a Friday,” he shrugged. “If you don’t want it, there might be some instant ramen in the cupboard.”

Nagisa realised that probably meant it was the _only_ thing in the cupboard. “What happened to you doing the shopping before coming home?”

“Something came up!”

“Something like, you forgot?”

Karma’s eyes flashed. “I would never.”

Perhaps it was a little childish, but so was conveniently forgetting to get something as basic as shopping. Nagisa’s gaze flicked around the room, sitting upon the towel used to dry the dishes. By the looks of it, it was still pretty damp. Like a flash, Nagisa sidestepped over to it, moving to flick it right at him, spraying stray drops of water.

“Oh,” his head lowered, bearing right into Nagisa’s, “you’re gonna get it.”

Although he lunged forwards, Nagisa saw it coming, and dodged, leaping over the kitchen counter as an attempt to block him. All the while, Daichi giggled at their display. Even if Karma had physical height and power on his side, Nagisa was more naturally nimble. Karma knew that, and how to change his tactic. Unfortunately, there wasn’t a lot of space to run in their small apartment. Since Nagisa wasn’t going for the kill, it was easy enough for Karma to just stride and reach for him, forcing his body off the ground. Nagisa shrieked in good fun, trying to swing his legs out to kick Karma in one of his essential organs. But his grip was strong, and Nagisa was out of practise. The only thing that made Karma let go was the sound of the buzzer again.

Nagisa straightened himself out, once he was back on the ground. “What did you even order?”

Turning over his shoulder, Karma shrugged. “Your favourite.”

“…Sushi?” He wasn’t even aware that any places did sushi delivery near them.

“Your _second_ favourite.”

Nagisa didn’t even know he had a second favourite. “Which is?”

“The first place that had a kid’s menu.”

They ended up eating fried chicken, which Nagisa decided he wasn’t mad about. It had been a while since they ate badly, and Nagisa _was_ tired. Daichi seemed to be enjoying it too, though hopefully not too much. Still, Nagisa was surprised by how much he was eating, given that he’d almost been asleep.

“I’ll buy real food tomorrow,” Karma eventually promised, having demolished his meal.

“Speaking about tomorrow,” Nagisa bit his lip. “Is it okay if one of my classmates comes over? We just have this project, and-“

He put his cartoon of strawberry milk down on the table. “It doesn’t matter to me.”

“Are you _sure_?” He looked down at his plate. A part of him wanted Karma to say no.

Before he could respond, there was a light banging of Daichi’s fists pounding proudly on his tray. “Done.”

Karma stood up. “Hmm, you ate quite a lot.”

“Papa,” he reached his arms up.

He didn’t hesitate to hold Daichi, though obviously attempted to avoid the food mess all over his shirt and face. “You definitely need a bath.”

Apparently that was enough of a goodbye for Nagisa’s sake too. Nagisa cut his losses, as the two of them disappeared into the bathroom, leaving him to clear everything else away. At least it was methodical enough for him to get lost in it, until the kitchen was practically sparkling. Nagisa then moved his bag into his bedroom, tugging the restricting school uniform off in favour of something more comfortable.

When he returned, Daichi was freshened up, in his pyjamas and plopped on the sofa with some movie or other. Not that he’d probably stay awake until the end of it. Nagisa sighed, going to sit down beside him. As predicted, his eyes started to droop, and it wasn’t long before he was asleep. Knowing it would be bad to just leave him like that, Nagisa gently scooped him up, carrying him off to bed.

Karma seemed to have decided he was going to study for the rest of the night, leaving Nagisa with not a lot else to do. He returned to his own bedroom for a little bit, flicking through his history textbook with the illusion of actually working, but it didn’t hold his attention for long. Instead, he found himself sinking down into the pillow, drifting off.

Sunlight gleamed through the window the next morning, and Nagisa was horrified at how late it was. Yet, somehow, he still felt tired. He dragged himself out of bed quickly, throwing on the first clothes he could grab. Looking briefly at his phone, Higashi was supposed to be there at any moment. Rushing now, he went into Daichi’s room, surprised he hadn’t been crying up a storm. He must have been tired too.

By some miracle, Nagisa managed to get him changed, dressed, and halfway fed by the time he got a text from Higashi, to say she was outside. He hadn’t had time to plan what he was going to say, in the slightest. And then he realised he couldn’t just take Daichi out with him. Nagisa decided that he was just going to have to deal with the consequences of annoying Karma, since he wasn’t willing to leave Daichi without supervision. He put him on the floor outside Karma’s room, pounding on the door hard enough that he’d definitely wake up, and then rushed out of the apartment.

Higashi was outside, leaning against the wall. “This building is a lot nicer than I thought it’d be.”

Gulping, Nagisa nodded. “We got a pretty good deal on it.”

“You and your roommate, right?” Higashi stood up properly, though kept her arms folded. “Do I get to meet him?”

“I-I suppose,” he looked down. “Look, about that-“

“You told me his name, didn’t you? Argh, what _was_ it? I can’t go in and introduce myself incorrectly!”

“It’s Karma, but-“ 

Her hand flew to the door handle. “We need to get started.”

Nagisa jolted. “Wait, Higashi san, there’s something I really need to tell you first!”

“You’re,” she cleared her throat, “you’re not _really_ in some sort of crime ring, are you?”

There was a certain kind of fatigue that came with this reputation. “The reason I never see anybody outside of school is because I have to take care of my son!”

“ _What_?”

He hadn’t meant to say it quite like that, but it was out there now. “And that’s why I live _here_ , with Karma. So we can take care of him, together.”

“Nagisa kun,” Higashi laughed after a moment. “I’d have noticed if you were _pregnant_.”

Oh. “It was almost two months before starting high school,” Nagisa explained as calmly as he could. “I was busy with a lot of… sports right after Daichi was born, so I lost most of the weight.”

She blinked. “You’re being serious.”

Nagisa nodded. “I know it’s a lot to take in, but-“

“Do I get to play with it?!”

Well, that he hadn’t expected. Higashi, with all her conspiracy theories… He thought she’d be grilling him for hours about this, not just accepting it. He could help but think she didn’t actually believe him, like he was trying to pull some kind of practical joke on her.

“ _Him_ ,” Nagisa corrected, “and, I mean, if we have time?”

He couldn’t help but feel nervous as he lead the way upstairs, and then unlocked his door. The way her eyes slightly widened when she saw the place didn’t go unmissed. Though it wasn’t particularly messy, there were a couple of toys strewn around he hadn’t had the chance to clean up yet. Aside from his own parents and some of his old classmates, Nagisa had never had had someone over before.

“S-should we sit at the table?” Nagisa suggested, since they did actually have to do some work.

Slowly, Higashi nodded, setting her bag down on top of the table. “Yeah.”

Nagisa was just straightening out his books, when he caught the noise of the door opening. It was only slightly, a child sized gap apparently, because it was closed almost immediately after Daichi was thrust out of it. Well, he’d known Karma would probably be moody with him, but leaving Daichi alone was worse!

He stood up, going to pick his poor confused son up. Daichi didn’t immediately try to squirm away, which meant he was in a clingy mood. “This is Daichi.”

“O-oh,” Higashi tilted her head, squinting as though he was a mirage. “Hi?”

Nagisa walked over and sat back down again, Daichi on his lap. He was right, Daichi seemed happy enough to sit there, once Nagisa handed him one of his markers (too large for there to be much risk of choking without him noticing) to amuse himself with. He was mostly apathetic to the strange girl in his home, though maybe that was tiredness.

“He doesn’t look like you,” Higashi pointed out, as if she was just voicing the first thing that came to her head.

Looking down at Daichi, Nagisa sighed. “I promise you I do remember having him,” he smiled almost sadly, “he just takes after his Papa.”

“Papa?” Daichi perked up, head whipping around.

“We’re not going to see him now,” Nagisa told him, “unless you want him to fight me again.”

Higashi exhaled. “You really have a baby.”

So there it was. “I’m not sure if he counts as a baby anymore,” Nagisa smiled.

“Can I hold him?”

“If he lets you,” Nagisa transferred him onto Higashi’s knee. He was old enough now that he didn’t feel the need to instruct her on how to properly keep him upright. Mostly, Higashi just looked transfixed. “So, the project?”

“…Right.”

Even with Daichi’s presence, and the probably hundreds of questions brimming under the surface, they got right down to the work. Every inch of Nagisa’s soul hated the inaccuracies of what he was being forced to write about, but it was probably worth it for the sake of good grades. Even if the history book he had to read from’s reasoning for the catalyst of this incident was simply ‘he was an omega’. Maybe something less biased would have been more interesting, since the story involved the guy murdering the lord he was supposed to be ‘serving’ as a concubine. Whatever the case, they were getting through the work at a pretty good pace.

“Afternoon.”

Nagisa had been so distracted with what he was writing he’d barely heard the door open. Karma finally made his appearance, as if he’d got only twenty minutes of sleep. Apparently he was still mad about the awakening, because he didn’t give Nagisa any other acknowledgment, going straight into the kitchen.

“Wait.” Higashi peered around the corner, and then lowered her voice. “ _That’s_ Karma?”

Nagisa slumped in defeat. “Yes.”

“ _The_ Karma?”

“Yes.”

“The father of your child, Karma?”

He swallowed. “Yes.”

Higashi grinned. “He’s hot.”

“Yes- _Wait_. No, that’s not what I meant.”

It looked like she was about to say something, but she was holding her tongue. Daichi had long since migrated to playing with his own toys on the floor, bored of the lack of amusement, but perked his head towards their conversation. Hopefully he wasn’t quite old enough to repeat any of that.

“Oh no you don’t,” Nagisa lurched up when he caught sight of what Karma was doing, racing across into the kitchen. “You barely had half of the cartons this month, and the delivery comes in a few days!”

Karma looked at his coffee cup. “I need caffeine. Especially after what you did this morning.”

“Maybe you should have gone to sleep earlier,” Nagisa chided.

“And whose fault is it for buying the milk in the first place?” Karma smirked, and took one of the strawberry milk cartoons, pouring it in. “It was more of a prank on yourself, _Nagisa_ ~ . Anyway, aren’t you going to introduce me to your friend?”

Without much warning, Higashi lurched up, striding her way into the kitchen. “Nice to meet you, I’m Higashi Haia.”

He shot a smile at her, then, and Nagisa couldn’t help but feel his stomach twist. “Akabane Karma, but you can just call me Karma.”

Higashi returned his smile, one of her hands moving up to her hair to twist it around her finger. Nagisa’s jaw dropped, feeling a little uncomfortable just standing there. He hadn’t seen Karma smile at anyone for that quantity of time… _ever_. For some reason, a kind of sickly rage burnt up inside him, like he wanted to snap their attentions away from each other.

“Anyway,” he eventually said, taking his mug. “I’ll catch up with you when you’re done.”

Higashi looked at Nagisa when he left. “Does he have a girlfriend?”

Nagisa tried his level best not to grab one of the knives from the draws and hold it at her throat, bloodlust charging up, taking over his body. It was like his eyes became the barrel of a gun, locking onto their target.

“Uhm, N-Nagisa kun?” Her voice broke, like she was afraid.

He snapped out of it. “We have work to finish.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Freudian slip perhaps, Nagisa?
> 
> As always, all comments and feedback are very much appreciated! 
> 
> Next time, the drama just gets more high key


	59. Argument Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nagisa has another fight with Rin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~you may want to quickly blitz through chapters 39 and 51 if it's been a long time since you've read them and get a little confused by some of the content of this chapter~

Nagisa couldn’t stand the recent developments in his life. He was absolutely livid under the surface whenever he had to see Higashi, Rin, or Karma. Unfortunately, he saw them all quite frequently. It was like he had three different, huge problems, and he was just alternating between them all with every waking minute. At least it was only a month until the summer break.

Tuning it out didn’t really work. Because it seemed to be all Higashi wanted to talk about. Nagisa was almost scared of his own mood. Every time she suggested they hang out at his place, or she asked any kind of question regarding Karma, he felt his bones begin to boil, blood lust simmering at alarming rates. And he knew this was not a good thing, at all. He knew that he shouldn’t be thinking about wrapping his hands around her dainty throat.

“It shouldn’t matter, right?” Higashi stated, as they walked along together. “Now that I know.”

Nagisa swallowed his fury. “It’s just busy with a baby.”

She wanted to come over again. Maybe there had been a reason, Nagisa’s ears had started to burn by the time she opened her mouth, so he hadn’t really listened to it. But, it didn’t matter. Nagisa just needed to make a better excuse. She’d spent the entire remainder of her first visit making eyes at Karma. And what’s worse, Karma didn’t even seem to _mind_ her doing it. Or maybe he just hadn’t noticed. Nagisa was in love with him for almost a year and Karma didn’t notice.

Higashi came to a stop. “You’re not… annoyed at me, are you, Nagisa kun?”

Well, he wasn’t going to tell her that. Nagisa wasn’t _annoyed_ , exactly. If anything he was annoying himself, because it wasn’t like he had the right to feel this way. Karma could take care of himself. Maybe he was acting a little rash. Though, Nagisa wasn’t even going to allow himself to entertain the idea of ‘what if’.

“I’m not annoyed,” he said levelly.

“Well, okay…” Higashi sighed. “I’m sorry if I’m… pushing at your boundaries. My parents have kind of been on my case lately. I’ve been wanting to stay out as long as possible.”

Maybe Nagisa was wrong to be acting this way. It wasn’t like Karma was even his to be concerned with anyway. And contrary to everyone’s belief, apparently, he never had been. It just felt like his heart was about to be ripped out of his chest with the thought of them together. And he couldn’t even try and distract himself anymore because all _Rin_ wanted to talk about was university. Nagisa was about to drown under the guilt of it all.

On that thought, Nagisa remembered that he had agreed to meet with Rin. So close to midterms, even without the tension between them Nagisa would have cut off most contact. As always, he didn’t want Rin’s prospects to suffer for his sake. But, heknew it wouldn’t be right if he avoided all contact completely.

“I’ll see if Karma has a problem with it,” Nagisa promised reluctantly, before turning away.

He showed up to the roof five minutes early, but Rin was already waiting there. Deep in his many files, it seemed. Even when he wasn’t studying recently, it was all about university worries. Nagisa really wanted to try his best to help, but he didn’t know how exactly. He didn’t feel right about lying, No matter the circumstances.

“Hey,” he said, as warmly as he could.

Rin looked up from what he was reading and cracked a smile. “Hi!”

Coming to sit down beside him, Nagisa’s suspicions were right. He was looking at application forms. Although it was easy to get straight into their high school’s university, you still had to apply to do so. Nagisa couldn’t immediately see if there were any others tucked beneath it, but with their recent issues he highly doubted it.

“Are you filling those out?” He just had to ask.

“Oh,” he looked down at it. “I was going to.”

Nagisa took a deep breath in. “Rin kun-“

“It’s okay,” his face turned a little sad, “I know you don’t agree with it.”

He hated the tone of defeat in Rin’s voice. “I just don’t want you to give up your life for me.”

“It’s hardly giving up my life!” He raised his volume then, obvious frustration filtering through. “I can study this subject literally anywhere in Japan. Why not take it here?”

There were many, many reasons Nagisa could think of. The largest perhaps was that Rin seemed so _attached_ to this. What if they broke up before then, and Rin ended up regretting his entire life? Nagisa couldn’t be the reason for that, no way. Maybe if they’d been together for longer, it would be more worth debating, but not like this.

“We’ve only been dating for a few months. It just,” he swallowed, “seems like a lot.”

Rin’s eyes widened. “Wait, is that the reason?”

“Please don’t take that in a bad wa-“

But he looked like he was seething already. “We may as well just break up now then.”

“W-what?”

“If you don’t see any kind of future for us,” he said seriously, “there’s no point in wasting our time here.”  

Was that it, then? Nagisa knew that they’d argued a lot recently, but weren’t all couples supposed to do that? It didn’t seem like a reason to break up… He wasn’t entirely sure about how he felt about the idea of breaking up, he hadn’t considered that it would even happen. Maybe he was a little scared. He didn’t actually want to lose Rin, though. Plus… he wasn’t sure anyone else would even have time for him.

“It’s not that I don’t see anything,” Nagisa tried honestly. “I just… haven’t thought about it yet.”

Rin’s face darkened. “Time’s real and it’s coming for all of us, Nagisa kun.”

“That’s… a little heavy, don’t you think?” It made Nagisa feel a little on edge.

“Well, it’s true!” He snapped. “I’m not saying you have to start planning the wedding but there’s no point in staying in a relationship you see the end of.”

The wedding?! Even if they were just on the roof, out in the open, Nagisa felt like he was suffocating. A part of him begun to wonder if Rin had a point, though. That’s typically what happened. Logically, you either stayed together forever, or you eventually broke up. When Nagisa thought about his life in five years or so, it was true he didn’t see Rin in it, but that was because he hadn’t even really thought about _that_ part of his life yet.

Nagisa wasn’t sure how to explain it. “It’s not that I see the _end_.”

“You have to face the facts!” Rin raised his voice once again. “In half a year I could be moving to the other side of Japan.”

“Long distance relationships can work,” Nagisa tried.

“Can they?!” His eyes flashed dangerous. “I just don’t see why you’re so against this then. You’re right, I could study anywhere, so why not here? Unless you’re planning to break up with me, in which case, save us both the trouble and just do it now.”

“Rin k-“

He gripped Nagisa by the shoulders, his eyes staring straight into Nagisa’s. “Is that what you want?”

Nagisa didn’t _know_ what he wanted. He hated himself for thinking it but this was almost an easy out. Deep down, he knew that even standing here and doubting this was a sign he should just take it. But his stomach lurched.

“N-no!” He protested, finally. Hopefully convincing enough.

Rin took a deep breath. “Then all I want is for you to be more serious about us.”

“I don’t know how,” Nagisa admitted. Really, he wasn’t sure what Rin actually meant by that.

His eyes flashed. “Stop spending all your time moping around your house with your ex for a start.”

Nagisa was sick of this argument. Maybe because they’d _had_ it literally countless times. Not that it always became a full argument, sometimes it was just a jab here or there. But it was getting under his skin. It wasn’t like debating it would change anything, Nagisa didn’t understand why Rin couldn’t just make his peace with everything and leave it at that.

“He’s not my ex boyfriend,” Nagisa let out, for what felt like the hundredth time. “…And you know why I can’t.”

Of course, Rin knew about his duties as a parent had to come first. He’d literally agreed to that, before Nagisa could even accept the idea of a relationship. He had to consider that maybe Rin hadn’t really understood all of what that meant. How could he? Nagisa wouldn’t have, either, before he had Daichi. But children put things into perspective.

“I’m not stopping you from bringing him,” Rin shrugged.

Had Nagisa heard that right? “Y-you want to meet Daichi?”

Rin remained firm. “I don’t mind. It’ll have to happen eventually, right?”

Suddenly, Nagisa was terrified by that possibility. Yes, he knew that _eventually_ , if their relationship continued, that it would come up. Honestly, Nagisa was still at the stage of denying Rin from walking him home right up to his apartment door, instead insisting that the building was close enough. Even if neither of Nagisa’s own parents had ever been interested in dating someone else, he knew he’d have hated it if they’d been dragging new people in and out of his life. He couldn’t do that.

“I’d… have to think about it.” It was the only answer he could give.

“You’ll think?” It sounded like a question, but Nagisa couldn’t be sure.

 

Nagisa drew his eyes to the floor. “I-I don’t have a different answer to that right now.”

“Listen,” Rin said, and then paused, as though he was going through a lot in his mind right then. “If it means that much to you, I’ll also apply to Kyuushu.”

 _Was_ that what Nagisa wanted, though? Sending Rin away just because he wanted it was just as bad as him staying. Ideally, Nagisa wouldn’t even be a factor in his decision. Or, at the very least, he’d only be a small one. At least Rin had said ‘also’. That meant he was less likely to be backed into a corner and bound by a decision just for his sake.

“I didn’t want you to do it just for me,” Nagisa’s voice wavered, like it was almost a plea.

Finally, it seemed like Rin’s anger had passed. “And it won’t be,” he smiled. “But, I really like you a lot, okay? I don’t want to just let this go.”

Nagisa nodded. “Okay.”

Before he had the chance to even think about it Rin wrapped his arms around him, eclipsing his form, as if he was scared Nagisa would wriggle out of his grasp. They’d shared plenty of hugs but this felt intense. The longer he held on, the harder it was for Nagisa to breathe. It wasn’t like he could move, though, his face smushed into Rin’s shoulder.

When he finally pulled back, Nagisa thought he might be let free, but then Rin smiled and pressed a kiss to his lips. Nagisa didn’t exactly have much of a choice about it, but he didn’t mind returning it, if Rin really did just want to kiss and forget about it. But then he didn’t leave it at just that, instead deepening is, a sort of franticness beneath it all.

Nagisa tried his best to turn his head, detaching them. “Rin kun, anybody could walk up here-“

He seemed pretty nonchalant. “Have they ever?”

Leaning down again, he kissed Nagisa even harder than he had before, as if there was some kind of intent there. Nagisa decided to just go along with it, though thought hard about keeping his participation to the proceedings to a minimum. It was hard to get absorbed in a kiss, when he was studying it so meticulously. He met Rin’s movements, but was careful not to initiate anything himself. Only when Rin’s hands slid lower down his back, pulling him in closer, did Nagisa start to worry. He begun to tug on his school shirt, like he was about to shove his hands underneath it, which was far too much for their school’s roof.

“That’s enough,” Nagisa tried to say a little firmer, using what force he could produce with his arms to create at least a small distance between them.

“Sorry,” Rin looked down.

It seemed like that was it, then. Just like that, they both made their goodbyes for the day, since they’d met after school finished for once. Some people were still milling around for clubs, but the building was relatively quiet around this time. Nagisa was able to make his way through it without bothering anybody at least.

His mind was full from that conversation, anyway. He hated that he and Rin didn’t seem to be getting over the argument stage of their relationship, which seemed to be dragging on for aeons. Though, it wasn’t like they ended up disagreeing every day about everything. Nor were they completely incompatible. Nagisa remembered how well they got on when they were just friends, what felt like years ago now.

“Hey, Shiota.”

Nagisa paused at the unfamiliar sounding voice. It couldn’t be anybody from his class, all of them had got the message by now that he went by his given name. Yet, it was kind of odd that anybody else would recognise him so easily, since Nagisa mostly kept to himself and his regular friends. A lick of danger ran up his spine.

When he turned, he felt like he might vaguely recognise the guy. Definitely not in his class, but in his year. He was sat with Oshiro, who Nagisa hadn’t even spoken to for a long time, over by the wall. Nagisa gulped. From the panic shot look in his eyes, this really couldn’t be good. It was almost like he was telling Nagisa to run.

“Wait-“ Oshiro said, but his friend was already walking towards Nagisa.

The guy raised a hand though, a silencing gesture. “I only want to talk.”  

Nagisa got the feeling that he didn’t just want to innocently talk. “I’m running a little late,” Nagisa tried. 

He laughed. “Wait just a second! Say, Shiota chan, where’s that boyfriend of yours?”

“Inside,” Nagisa started to walk again, in an attempt to just push past him.

“Stay.”

His tone was like icicles. A small part of Nagisa’s brain immediately wanted to snap to his order, and then he felt this kind of compression and sourness in the air around him. Had Nagisa not gone through all he had already, he would have been very scared. This was an attempt as alpha command, with no regards to the legalities of that apparently.

Oshiro seemed to be trying again. “Kuronuma kun-“

He looked at his friend, taking his attention off Nagisa for just a moment. “What, we’ve dropped to family name basis now? He’s just an omega,” he turned back to Nagisa again, “second hand goods at that.”

Nagisa glared at Oshiro, who’d turned white. “I only mentioned it once or twice…”

Kuronuma came even closer, uncomfortably in Nagisa’s personal space. “So, does Aino know about this dirty little secret of yours, huh? I mean, I’m no gossip, Shiota chan, not unless you give me reason to be.”

He didn’t even know what Kuronuma wanted from him. It seemed like a lot more than intimidation. Like he was looking for an excuse to do _something_ to Nagisa. Nagisa didn’t miss the way even Oshiro looked to be very frightened. But Nagisa wasn’t. He’d had to face people, trained _killers_ , far worse than a teenage alpha with some kind of superiority complex.

Maybe Nagisa was just on edge. Angry at Higashi for her obvious crush on Karma, angry at Rin for the entire way he’d been acting recently, angry at this situation he’d found himself in. Nagisa’s bloodlust had been trickling out of the seams these past few weeks, and there wasn’t a whole lot he could do to hold it back.

“Are you going to kill me?” Nagisa asked softly, tilting his head up to look Kuronuma innocently in the eye.

It clearly wasn’t what he’d been expecting to hear, from the way his eyes widened just a little. “Not at all,” he tried to regain is cool, “I-“

“U-uh, K-kaito…kun…” Oshiro interrupted him.

Nagisa didn’t take his focus from his target, though. He continued to stare him in the eye, unwavering in his attention. Stood like that, with Kuronuma practically paralysed under his gaze, Nagisa felt a familiar itch. Having held it back for long enough, he smiled sweetly, the aura promising certain death spilling into the air around them.

“W-what’s this,” he stammered.

Smile growing, Nagisa’s bones began to buzz. Darkening his gaze, he counted the palpitations of Kuronuma’s heart, choosing the right millisecond to strike. It was all he could not to go straight for the killing blow. No, instead he stamped forward, using the brief moment of actual paralysis to push him back, sitting him down on the wall he’d been lounging on before. Realising he’d fight back when he regained his senses probably, Nagisa slipped round behind him. One of his hands rested behind Kuronuma’s head, the other tilting his chin up, the perfect position to snap his neck.

Nagisa looked up at Oshiro’s trembling form. “I’d keep this conversation to yourselves.”

Losing to an omega would destroy his reputation, and it seemed both of them knew it. Satisfied that Kuronuma was subservient in fear, Nagisa let him go, continuing on his way home. He didn’t want to look back over his shoulder and think too hard about that conversation. He had far more to worry about, than whatever _that_ had been. Yes, he decided. He’d just force it down for now, he had places to be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I just enjoy BAMF Nagi. A little shorter than usual but theresalotofdrama. 
> 
> Kuronuma literally means black swamp by the way. 
> 
> Shameless self promo, I actually started working on a new AU! You can find it through my profile if you want, it's called A Little Wicked and it's basically this fantasy type thing, I'm having a lot of fun working on it. 
> 
> I hope you all enjoyed this one! Don't worry, in a few chapters time you'll both love and despise me~ As always, all comments and feedback are appreciated!


	60. Sick Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daichi gets ill

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A new chapter? So soon after the new one? *gasp* 
> 
> Also there's technically unnecessary drug use in this chapter. Well.

Nagisa loved the summer. The way the world seemed to spring to life, with everything else melting away for just a little while. Summer meant that there were no exams or schoolwork to worry about for a little while, not that it had stopped Karma from being at the books. It was the middle of his school break already, most of it having passed slowly and with little fanfare. Even turning seventeen hadn’t felt like much worth mentioning.

He tried to concentrate on whatever Rin was saying, but it was hard when his mind was elsewhere. Nagisa should have just told him he couldn’t make it. It wasn’t like this date was anything important, just ice cream on a hot summer’s day. At some point during the walk over to the shop and the incredibly long queue, they’d run out of real conversation. Now his words didn’t carry much weight, practically floating away into the sky.

It was ridiculous. Nagisa knew that he shouldn’t be worrying this much. Daichi was just a little bit sick, unwilling to eat and in a bad mood in general. Children, especially toddlers, got ill all the time. In fact, Nagisa was pretty sure he’d been worse on a few occasions with the sniffles. But, he’d looked so sad and almost _worried_ when Nagisa said goodbye. His own parents had left him in the care of others in a worse state, Nagisa knew, and he’d lived. It wasn’t like he was even alone, he doubted Karma would let him out of his _sight_. But, that didn’t mean he wasn’t completely on edge

“Wouldn’t you say, Nagisa kun?”

Nagisa blinked. “Hmm?”

Tilting his head, Rin just shrugged. “I was just saying it’s probably a lot hotter than this in Kyuushu.”

“Oh,” Nagisa shifted in his seat. “I like the hot weather.”

Rin sighed. “You’ll have to come visit me, then.”

He thought about that for a moment, before realising. “Does that mean-“

Taking a giant spoon of ice cream, Rin beamed. “I changed my mind after all. As much as I want to stay here… Well, there’s not a lot to _do_ around here. Not for the next four and a half years of my life, at least. After that… I’m not sure where I’ll be. But that doesn’t matter quite yet.” He sighed. “You don’t need to look so happy about it”

Nagisa caught himself. “I’m sorry. I’m just, really _happy_ for _you_ , Rin kun.”

He wasn’t about to launch over the table and embrace Rin, especially not in public, but he did reach across and take his hand. Nagisa just hoped it was enough to convince him. Mostly, he was just relieved, absolved of guilt. Things would work out, he knew they could. Even if their actual time together felt like it was swiftly coming to an end.

Rin looked down at their hands, still wearing his smile. “I think there’s something I have to tell you, actually.”

“Oh-“ Before Nagisa could even really start his sentence, his phone started vibrating. Sparring a glance down, his heart leapt up into his throat. “I have to take this.”

Rin’s brow furrowed. “It can’t wait?”

“That’s Karma…” Nagisa tried not to panic. “It could be something important.”

“But we’re in the middle of talking-“

“Really, Rin kun-“

It rang out.

Rin leant back in his chair. “See, if it’s anything really important he’ll just call back.”

Seconds later, it started to buzz again, and Nagisa shot Rin a glare. “Hello?”

“Nagisa.”

There was something incredibly wrong with Karma’s tone, something that frankly frightened him a bit. Immediately, his mind spiralled worse than it had before. “What’s wrong?”

There was a pause. “I-I don’t know.”

“What do you _mean_ you don’t know?” Why did Karma sound half broken?

He paused again. “He won’t stop crying for long enough to tell me.”

Nagisa needed to be rational about this. So, based on that information, Daichi wasn’t feeling much better. He wasn’t actually crying before Nagisa left, though, so it had probably become worse if anything. But the worst thing to do would be panicking, right? It seemed like Karma had already gone to that step.

“He just doesn’t know how else to express he’s ill,” Nagisa tried to justify.

Karma’s voice came through quieter. “What about the throwing up?”

His blood ran cold. “The what?”

“I didn’t want to bother you with just that,” Karma admitted.

“Why didn’t you just call when it happened?!”

It was hard to quell the anger running through his body, even though he knew it wasn’t Karma’s fault. He would _never_ intentionally put Daichi at risk. Nagisa took a few deep inhalations, feeling his heart rate slow to a more manageable rate.

“I thought I could handle it!”

“Well,” Nagisa thought, “have you taken his temperature?”

“You really think _our_ _son_ let me get anywhere near him with that thing?”

That probably had been a pretty stupid question. Daichi seemed to pick favourites with Karma for a lot of things (Nagisa wasn’t bitter about it, he _wasn’t_ ) but illness was not one of them. Even a minor case of sniffles, and he freaked out if Karma even tried to touch him. He didn’t like it so much when Nagisa tried comforting him either, but he had an easier time with it.

“Are there any strange rashes or something?” Nagisa had read somewhere that it could be a sign of something serious, but he wasn’t about to tell Karma that.

There was a moment of silence, as if Karma was actually looking. “I don’t think so?”

He tried to think of anything else. “Maybe you’re just worried-“

 “Do you really think I’d have called you if I wasn’t a minute away from taking him to the hospital?!”

The silence down the phoneline, between both of them, said it all. Nagisa knew Karma definitely wasn’t stupid, the furthest thing from it, he wouldn’t just call Nagisa if it was nothing. Even if he was struggling, he wasn’t the first to admit he needed help. He definitely wouldn’t actually go to a hospital if there was no reason.

“That bad?” Nagisa just about got out.

“I-I even tried asking Okuda san but she didn’t know.”

He gulped. “I’ll be back as soon as I can, okay?”

Mind starting to race, Nagisa hung up the phone. Maybe it was just a stomach bug. Though he hadn’t been to nursery since their school break, it wasn’t as if they’d confined him inside. He could have picked up _anything_ , it wouldn’t be fun but it was unlikely there was anything dangerously wrong with him. He just needed to be calmed down enough to get some fluids in him or something.

“What was that about?”

Nagisa had completely zoned out of where he was. For the briefest of moments, he worried that leaving so suddenly would anger Rin, since it wouldn’t be the first time Nagisa had cancelled plans. He didn’t have enough time to even consider it, though. No matter what the consequences were, Nagisa’s mind was made up.

“Daichi’s sick,” he explained, already moving to stand up, “I have to go home.”

Predictably, Rin didn’t look impressed. “Why can’t Karma look after him?”

“It’s not about that…” Nagisa was beginning to feel sick himself. “I shouldn’t have even come anyway.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

He didn’t have time to have another fight. “I’ll see you soon.”

Maybe it was awful to just walk off like that, but Nagisa was prepared to deal with Rin being upset with him. As soon as he was on his way, it disappeared from his mind entirely. As much as he was sure it wouldn’t get worse in his short journey home, but that was no reason to not _rush_. Like everything moved in a blur, his feet pounded on the concrete below him.

Soon enough, he was there, having just about enough sense left in him to kick off his shoes first. Despite Karma telling him about constant crying, their apartment was near silent. Nagisa was half convinced Karma had actually just gone to the hospital. But, he walked quietly, to where Daichi’s door was slightly ajar. He pushed it open, to find Karma was still there thankfully, though he was just sat there. By the looks of things, Daichi was asleep.

“I’m here,” he said as quietly as he could manage whilst still being heard.

Karma blinked, like he was surprised Nagisa was there. “You came.”

Seeing that Daichi was, by immediate appearances, _okay_ , most of the tension left Nagisa’s body. He whimpered in his sleep, though, thrashing about like something was bothering. Just by the look on Karma’s face, he knew he couldn’t have exaggerated much of it.

“You got him to go to sleep,” he said, hoping it might make him feel better.

It didn’t work. “He knocked himself out with all the crying.”

As if on cue, Daichi did begin to stir. Though their speech could have been the reason, Nagisa doubted it, with how unrestful he’d just seemed. He seemed more confused than he usually would be, his gaze not really focusing on anything. It only took a few moments, though, before he gained some awareness. And then came the crying, which apparently Karma hadn’t been kidding about.

“Dada!” He sobbed, amongst unintelligible noises. That was good, though, it showed he at least knew where he _was_.

“Hey,” Nagisa said softly, “how are you feeling?”

Daichi continued to sob, which was enough of an answer. Taking his chances, Nagisa came right up to him. When Daichi didn’t immediately flinch away, he took his chance, pressing the back of his hand to his forehead. Not that Nagisa often touched him like that, but he immediately realised it was a hotter than usual.

“He probably has a fever,” he admitted.

Karma shot him a sympathetic look, knowing what that meant. It also meant Karma wasn’t planning to help him with it, though Nagisa supposed he could let him off since he clearly _had_ tried earlier. The thermometer was already in reaching distance. He didn’t have much of a chance to mask what he was doing. When Daichi saw it, his eyes widened with new alertness, and his cries even became worse.

He did his best to be gentle. Physically forcing Daichi into anything felt close to evil as far as Nagisa was concerned, even if he knew it was necessary. But, he held him still as he could, eventually working the device into his ear. Daichi screamed, as loud as Nagisa imagined was physically possible, trying to bash out of his grasp. The thermometer clicked quickly enough, giving him a reading, and he took it out. Looking at it, it was pretty high, not enough to warrant a quick trip to the hospital, but definitely a fever. Though, Daichi had never reacted like that before. He usually calmed down, when Nagisa actually took his temperature.

Immediately, Nagisa had a theory.

“Can you point to what hurts?” It was worth a try, at the very least.

Daichi didn’t do anything immediately, but either his betrayal faded, or he just did it out of his own pain. Sobs becoming a little more quiet, he clutched his ear, tugging it before thrashing around again. Though he was in no way a doctor, it made sense. An ear infection, then, hopefully would explain the temperature and the sickness.

But first to comfort him. “It’s all done now,” he said, “I promise.”

It was a lie, though, Nagisa knew. If he had a fever, then Nagisa had to give him medicine. He was pretty sure whatever child friendly flavour it had advertised on the box was a complete lie, because Daichi hated it more than green peppers. There wasn’t a single time, in Daichi’s year and a half of life, where Nagisa had managed to give it to him without a struggle. Even the first time he’d got the sniffles, and had never tasted it before, it was like he _knew_.

“I think it might be an ear infection,” Nagisa said, turning to Karma. “It looks like it’s hurting him. Did you try giving him this?”

Karma nodded. “He spat it back out again.”

Cringing, Nagisa poured a little onto a spoon. “ _Daichi_ …”

“No!” He’d stopped sobbing, though discomfort was written all across his face. Though there wasn’t a lot of escape room, since he was barred in by the crib, Nagisa didn’t doubt that he’d try it.

“What if we make you pancakes after this?”

Daichi seemed to mull it over, for maybe half a second. “Not hungry.”

So bribery wouldn’t work. “It will make your ear stop hurting.”

He started up the crying again, so clearly that wasn’t about to happen. Nagisa couldn’t get too annoyed at him, he doubted Daichi was old enough to have grasped the concept that suffering briefly was worth a greater reward. But who _knew_ what his son was thinking? There wasn’t a lot of other options.

“Hey, Daichan,” Karma finally piped up. Before Nagisa could stop him, he grabbed hold of the spoon, taking the dose into his own mouth. “See, tastes great.”

“Karma!” Nagisa turned to him in a mixture of alarm and horror.

He shot Nagisa a look. “What? It’s for babies, it won’t do anything to me.”

If he was going to be concerned about him doing _that_ , it would have to wait until later. “You gonna be brave, Daichi?”

He didn’t respond to Nagisa, but he didn’t start freaking out either when he came closer with a new spoonful. It took him a few moments, but eventually, with the spoon pressed insistently against his lips, he opened his mouth. Nagisa didn’t waste any time tipping it in, immediately picking Daichi up and holding him close afterwards, reassuring him of how good he was.

Daichi didn’t seem particularly happy about any of it, but he at least didn’t try to spit it back out. That was a win, in Nagisa’s eyes. Since he relaxed a little, Nagisa decided to let him stay like that, rather than putting him back down again. Perhaps the body heat wasn’t the best for him, but he needed the comfort.

“Should I get a wet cloth?” Nagisa said, mostly wondering aloud.

“Don’t,” Karma replied pretty quickly. “That’s not how fevers work. If you make him too cold it’ll just rise back up again higher.”

They spent quite a while like just like that. Nagisa held Daichi in his arms, soothing him as best he could every moment he looked like he remembered he was in pain. Beside him, Karma had elected to just start speaking to Daichi as he normally did. It wasn’t the most engaging of conversations, especially as Daichi barely responded, but it did the job of distracting him until he began to doze off again.

Nagisa knew that sleep was probably the best cure for him, overall. His body just needed some rest to help fight the infection. Once it seemed like he wasn’t going to wake right back up again, he nodded to Karma, before moving him back into the crib. He decided to forgo any covers, though, given his temperature. Much more peaceful than before, Nagisa was happy to leave him for a while.

Not that he went far. Just about creeping out, Karma behind him, he slid down the wall right beside Daichi’s door. It was the easiest way to listen out for anything. Karma apparently had the same idea, sitting next to him. Even if Daichi really did need to rest, Nagisa doubted either of them would be able to take their minds off it for long enough to do anything else.

“You’re better at this than me,” Karma finally said.

Where was he in his head? Even though Nagisa observed him, as he observed all those around him, it was incredibly hard to get any kind of sense of Karma’s intentions. It frustrated him to no end, one moment he thought he knew where they stood, and then the next he acted completely different. Though they’d been friends for many years, arguably more than that, there was only a small percentage of Karma that Nagisa could say he understood.

Nagisa swallowed. “Not really.”

“Imagine if I’d actually taken him to the hospital just for this… I can’t help but feel like I’m failing him or something. It shouldn’t be that hard alone, just because he’s a little bit sick.”

Surprising even himself, Nagisa didn’t like the moments where Karma actually admitted his weaknesses. Prying them out of him was one thing, but wilful speech? Nagisa did know from confidence that Karma wasn’t truly being himself when that happened.

“You just worry about him a lot, maybe too much sometimes,” Nagisa rationalised. It would be awful if Karma _didn’t_. “I remember, the day he was born, you said we were in this together, right? I wouldn’t be able to take care of him alone, at least not forever. He needs the both of us.”

Without warning, Karma was half on top of him, though it was an awkward position from where he’d moved from. It took Nagisa a moment to even register what was happening to him, and when he did manage to get it into his brain he was being _hugged_ , it was over, and Karma had returned to himself. Not that it stopped the electric buzz beneath Nagisa’s skin.

“So,” he said, old tone returning, “do you want anything for dinner?”

Nagisa tried to straighten up. “Nothing too big… and not for Daichi either, if he really was sick. Maybe if he seems up to it we could let him watch a movie or something.”

It was probably going to be a long few days.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Daichi... He'll be okay though I promise! 
> 
> Honestly there's a chapter I really really want done for Christmas, hence the quick updates. I have an exam soon, so I might have to not update for a couple of weeks AFTER said chapter. But, well, you'll see. 
> 
> As always, comments and feedback are much welcome!


	61. Playtime

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nagisa's looking after Daichi for the day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Am I on a role or what?

It had only been a few hours, and Nagisa was near exhausted to the bone. As much as spending time with Daichi made him the absolute happiest, it really was hard to do it alone. Daichi didn’t just have energy, he _exuded_ it, which was fine for a little while, entertaining, even. There didn’t seem to be any stop to it, though, and Nagisa needed a _nap_. Not that he’d trade it for having Daichi any way other than this.

“Come on Daichi,” Nagisa tried from across the apartment. “It’ll only take a few seconds.”

Instead of co-operating, Daichi seemed to find Nagisa’s struggles absolutely hilarious. Enough to run around, directly away from him, laughing as he did so. Nagisa wouldn’t mind Daichi trying to give him trouble ordinarily, but he could see the potential mess. Lunch, it seemed, had been _too_ much of a success. He was going through a kind of fussy eating phase, so Nagisa had just been happy he’d eaten all of it. Well, at least half, the other half was smudged over his face and hands.

Daichi was annoyingly fast, when he wanted to be. Clearly, or Nagisa would have caught him by now. The apartment was hardly a large space to run around, but it was just big enough that they could turn circles without Nagisa easily being able to grab him. The furniture only worked to Daichi’s advantage, since it blocked Nagisa’s path, and he wasn’t as easily equipped to just crawl underneath some of it.

Finally, he changed tactic, coming to a stop. Surely, Daichi would give up when the fun was taken out of it. Like he guessed, Daichi did stop moving, but he didn’t seem to be in much of a rush to come back over to Nagisa. No, he just stood there firmly, like he was prepared to stare him down. Once again, Nagisa wished Karma was there, because he probably _could_ have stayed there and beat Daichi in a battle of will. But Nagisa couldn’t. _Surely_ , there was only so long before he got bored.

Making his mistake, Daichi did turn, and Nagisa basically launched himself before he had the chance to figure out what was going on. Swooping Daichi into his arms, he only majorly squirmed for a moment or two before accepting defeat. Trying his best not to drop or further bother him, Nagisa reached for wipe.

“I do it,” Daichi complained, turning his head as far out of Nagisa’s grasp as possible.

Nagisa sighed. He really did want to do everything himself these days. Whatever the case, he wasn’t about to try and force the issue. Hoping he could trust Daichi not to run off again, he set him down on the floor, handing him the wipe himself. Daichi seemed a little unsure, at first, but they’d been through this routine enough times by now. He had the right idea in general.

“Well done,” Nagisa said, taking the liberty of throwing the wipe away. He hadn’t done a perfect job, but it was the effort that counted. His face was at least acceptably clean.

He wandered around without clear aim for a few minutes, which gave Nagisa enough time to actually clean up some of the mess the whole chase had caused. He knew Daichi was more than okay, anyway, since he could hear him mumbling away to himself. Despite his awareness that Daichi could speak very well for his age, he couldn’t comprehend half of the things that came out of his mouth. For a moment, he went quiet, before barrelling himself into the side of Nagisa’s leg.

“Papa gone?” He blinked innocently.

Nagisa looked down at him. “You only just noticed?”

Daichi didn’t answer that, toddling off outside Karma’s room, where he started to knock. “Papa? Papa!”

“He’ll be back later,” Nagisa picked Daichi up whilst he said it. There was always the chance he might get upset about that, and he didn’t want to be chasing after a tearful Daichi. Thankfully, he seemed okay about it.

Wrapping his arms around his neck, Daichi was content to cuddle up to him. “Love you Dada.”

Nagisa beamed. “I love you too. What do you want to do now?”

Nothing, if he was going to take Daichi’s lack of response for granted. He didn’t get how he could go on and on about nothing, but go completely silent at other times. Nagisa decided to just make it easier for him by supplying some options.

“How about… A movie?”

Daichi shook his head.

“Playing cars?”

“Nooo.”

Nagisa thought. “Drawing?”

“Yeah!”

Of course, the messiest of activities. It was almost like Daichi was going it on purpose. Still, Nagisa didn’t hesitate, getting a few coloured pens and paper out. Daichi’s idea of drawing didn’t really constitute actual artwork yet, the most complex thing being an attempt at a circle, but he seemed to enjoy scribbling with varying colours. Since he doubted Daichi would be in the mood to stay there for a while by himself, Nagisa decided to ‘draw’ (AKA do his homework) next to him.

He was pretty excited about it for a few minutes, frantically swapping between colours to fill the first few sheets of paper like they were nothing. Nagisa left him at it, trying to actually make sense of his work. Once again, returning to school after a large break from it was a bit of a learning curve. It was tough, and he knew it was only going to get tougher, but Nagisa knew it would be worth it.

“Sun,” Daichi pointed, taking more interest in _his_ page, where’d he’d only got as far as writing the date.

“That’s Sunday,” Nagisa corrected without thinking about it for a moment.

Daichi seemed to accept that, going back to his drawing. It took him a few seconds before he took in what happened. Although he’d technically said the wrong thing, Daichi had still recognised _one_ of the readings. Immediately, Nagisa was curious. It wasn’t like he’d prompted him or anything.

“Daichi?” He asked, to get his attention. “C-Can you _read_ that?”

He didn’t say anything, but then Nagisa got an idea. He didn’t know when kids were supposed to learn how to read. The doctor hadn’t even mentioned it at any of Daichi’s check ups. Nagisa didn’t know if teaching him like this was _too_ early or anything, but he was pretty sure it wouldn’t do any harm. Taking a piece of paper, he wrote the first five letters of the alphabet as big as he could. He was interested to see what would happen. Though, he didn’t expect too much. Recognising one kanji was no different really than being able to identify a picture.

“Ah, ee, oo, eh, oh,” he said slowly, over pronouncing the letters as he pointed to them all.

Daichi studied it for a moment. Nagisa wasn’t sure what to make of his reaction. Did he even know what to do with this information? He supposed not, but there was no harm in just showing him. To Nagisa’s surprise, he repeated the letters, but more like a word than individuals. Daichi still seemed interested, surprisingly.

“Well done,” he said. “How about this?”

He experimented with a few things. Firstly, he covered up one of the letters, wondering if Daichi could figure out what was gone. He had a good time shouting them out, but he didn’t seem to be getting the answer right, though. Following that, he tried just pointed to each one, and asking him to name it. Again, he didn’t really seem to know the difference but there was an adorable concertation on his face. At least he was having a good time doing it.

“A!” Daichi called out finally, correctly.

Probably a fluke, Nagisa decided. He didn’t want to stretch Daichi’s brain too far, for fear of giving him a headache. So, Nagisa left him to it, returning to his homework for a little while. He didn’t get particularly far, finding watching Daichi far more interesting. Instead of going back to drawing, he still squinted at the letters.

“Up,” he pointed, after a little while.

That was enough of that, then. Nagisa obliged, moving his work into a mostly neat pile, and then bent down to pick Daichi up. He wasn’t sure where he wanted to achieve from that, but he never minded having Daichi in his arms. Even though he was rapidly getting heavier, almost by the day. Nagisa wouldn’t even be able to lift him soon.

He tapped Nagisa’s arm. “Play blocks?”

“Sure.”

Daichi had a lot of fun with those, too. Now that he had the motor skills to actually build a proper tower, it held his attention for quite some time. Nagisa sat with him of course, occasionally contributing a block to give Daichi the reassurance he wasn’t just playing alone. Daichi took the most joy in knocking down his creations afterwards, in increasingly creative.

When his phone started buzzing, it took him by surprise. His first thought was Karma, but he only ever called when he absolutely had to. Reaching for it, he was confused to see that it was actually Rin calling. Which was odd, because he always seemed to prefer texting. He didn’t have a reason to be calling, did he?

“Hi?” Nagisa questioned down the phone.

“You never texted me back,” Rin replied simply, though his tone was light.

He was definitely forgetting something. “Texted you back?”

“You said you were going to come out with me today, but you didn’t know when, remember?”

Nagisa only slightly recalled that conversation, since he’d been half awake at the time. He didn’t doubt that he’d agreed, though. But then again, he hadn’t expected Karma to leave earlier in a kind of raged frenzy. All Nagisa had caught of it was there was a specific book he needed and he couldn’t get it so he was spending the rest of his day in the library. Which meant he was alone with Daichi.

Nagisa cringed in preparation for another argument if he said no. Cancelling plans seemed to one of the things that really got to Rin, even if he claimed to ‘understand’.  It almost wasn’t even an option. He thought about just going out to meet him. Ever since the argument they had about Nagisa not being serious enough, months ago now, he _had_ been thinking about it. Enough even to off handily mention it to Karma, who seemed apathetic, so he didn’t have to worry about his feelings.  

“Do you mind going to a soft play?”

Daichi didn’t seem to mind the sudden idea of an outing, once Nagisa had hung up the phone. Although, actually leaving was a little bit of a process, since Daichi was in the mood to put his own coat and shoes on. By the time they actually got out, significantly later, he also insisted on walking the entire way. With Daichi skipping along just ahead of him, Nagisa started to feel pretty nervous.

It was now or never, though. Rin was stood there, waiting for him outside. “Hi!”

Nagisa made sure to distance himself a little so he didn’t try to go for a hug. “Rin,” he cleared his throat, “this is Daichi.”

His eyes drew downwards. Nagisa’s own followed him, trying to gauge his reaction. Daichi, too, looked a little confused. Maybe because they’d stopped and now they were all just staring at each other. It was hard to guess what Rin was thinking, though it looked like he was just analysing everything. Nagisa almost wondered if he’d ever _seen_ a toddler before.

“He’s so small,” Rin admitted, and tried crouching down. “Hi there, Daichi.”

Nagisa half expected Daichi to immediately run over to the new interesting person, like he’d seen him do many times now. But, to his genuine surprise, Daichi remained silent, shifting behind Nagisa’s leg as if to hide. He tugged on the material of his trousers like it was a blanket. Which was odd, because he’d never shown any kind of fear of strangers before.

“He’s just shy,” Nagisa lied, unsure of what to make of it.

Rin nodded, standing back up again. “That’s normal, isn’t it?”

“He just needs to get used to you…” Nagisa looked down, where suddenly Daichi was thrusting his arms out. Usually, he’d verbally ask. Nagisa knew for a fact ‘up’ was one of Daichi’s most confident words. Still, if he wanted to be carried, Nagisa wasn’t going to deny that.

They made their way inside. Honestly, Nagisa never really took Daichi here that often. Most weekends they wouldn’t really take him out, since he got enough out of the house time from nursery. During the recent break, if they went anywhere, it had pretty much been exclusively outside. So, he wasn’t exactly a regular, but he did know there was a small café area next to the baby play section.

Daichi wasn’t even squirming in his arms from excitement of getting down and being allowed to play. In fact, he was clutching onto Nagisa rather tightly. Even when they found a table, he didn’t seem to want to sit on his own chair, content apparently on Nagisa’s lap. It was easier to think about what Daichi was doing than anything else, considering Rin was being completely silence. He didn’t miss the way Daichi looked longingly at the play area.

“Do you want to go play?” He tried.

Very subtly, Daichi nodded, and that was all Nagisa needed to lower him to the floor. He didn’t have qualms about letting him go off and do his own thing, since the chairs were so close. At least Daichi looked a little bit happier, once his mind was distracted by a plethora of bright colours and activities.

“This isn’t the best place for a date,” Nagisa finally said, half like it was intended to be an apology.

Rin waved him off. “There’s worse places.”

“Than screaming children?” He said it through a smile, though.

He looked around. “It’s different to how I thought it would be.”

This definitely could have gone a lot worse. Rin didn’t seem too bothered that Nagisa had dragged him to a somewhere like this at least, but he did look completely out of place. With not a lot else to discuss, since the main subject honestly scared Nagisa a little, he ended up just asking Rin about his homework. It brought him back, to all the lunchtimes they’d spend in the library together. A much simpler time, almost. At least there was that to focus on. But there was still a conversation to be had.

“Rin kun, I-“ Before he could get his words out, a weight banged into his leg.

“Dada, hurts,” Daichi sniffled, his voice low.

Nagisa hadn’t seen him injure himself, but there was no blood or obviously twisted limbs, nor was Daichi screaming. So it couldn’t have been too bad. Still, he picked Daichi back up again, holding him close in comfort. He seemed to relax a little for a moment, before taking in his surroundings. Once he did, he shifted around, turning so he could bury his head in Nagisa’s jacket, hiding from the world.

“What are you _doing_?” He asked through mild amusement.

“Aw,” Rin said, and then started tapping the table.

Nagisa sighed. “I think he’s just tired. He’d been running around all day.”

“I don’t mind,” Rin smiled. “Nagisa kun, I’m happy, really. It feels like you’re ready to be serious.”

“O-oh.” From inside his little hideaway, Daichi began squirming like he was trying to get comfortable.  “I think we should be going now. Daichi definitely needs a nap.”

Rin stood up. “I’ll walk back with you.”

He ended up carrying Daichi as they walked. Which meant he was definitely going to have a long nap. Nagisa, too, needed a long nap. It had been a weirdly long day. It felt like his arms might fall off, but he would never complain.

“It’s kind of weird to me,” Rin piped up. “Knowing you have a son is one thing but seeing it…”

Nagisa wasn’t sure how to respond to that. He supposed he’d find it weird too if he were in Rin’s shoes. But being a parent had been his reality for so long it was even stranger to imagine a different life. Of course he knew there had been a time before Daichi, where he wasn’t constantly putting anyone else’s needs above his own, but it was so distant now.

It didn’t take them too long to get back to Nagisa’s building. Ordinarily, he’d have said his goodbyes right there, but he supposed there wasn’t much of a reason anymore. He didn’t really want to disturb Daichi more, anyway. Though he didn’t directly invite Rin in, he hardly stopped him either, and he followed him all the way to the door.

Manoeuvring himself to produce the key and get the door open was always a challenge when holding Daichi. Daichi was still awake, when Nagisa looked, so he put him down to make it easier for himself. Once the door was unlocked, Nagisa pushed it a little bit, surprised to see Karma was already standing in the hallway.

“Oh, Karma!”

Daichi looked up wearily. “Papa?”

“I just got back,” he explained. “Where did you go, huh?”

Daichi stumbled straight past him and into their apartment, apparently not interested in that conversation.

“Just the soft play place,” Nagisa explained, and then remembered himself. If only the ground could swallow him whole. “R-right. Karma, Rin. Rin, Karma.”

Behind him, Rin shifted. “I’m Aino Rin, nice to make your acquaintance.”

Karma seemed to look him over for a moment. “Is that _so_?”

Nagisa gulped. “A-anyway! I should be saying bye, now! I’ll see you tomorrow, Rin kun.”

He froze when suddenly Rin was kissing him, hard, with very little warning. It was too quick for him to move away, or do anything. It wasn’t just a kiss, though, it was like he wanted to start a passionate make out right there in the hallway. Nagisa wasn’t particularly comfortable with that situation, he realised, at least ten seconds into it. Rin’s hand was practically fisted in his hair, so it was hard to break off the kiss. By the time he managed it, the apartment door was already closed again.

“W-what was that for?” He tried to catch his breath.

Rin shrugged, like that _hadn’t_ just happened. “I didn’t get the chance to do it earlier.”

He wasn’t sure. “Right.”

“Your hair is kind of nice like that,” he said nonchalantly, lifting a strand that had obviously come loose between his fingers. “Maybe you should wear it down sometime.”

“Oh,” Nagisa felt his stomach twist.

“Anyway!” He smiled. “I’ll see you at lunch tomorrow? Love you!”

Nagisa practically raced inside the apartment, after watching him walk away for a few seconds. His heart was pounding so hard it threatened to beat out his chest, and he didn’t think in a good way. Mind swimming with thoughts, he felt like he might just drown right then and there.

“What’s wrong with _you_?” Karma looked him over, though something in his aura felt a little smug.

His eyes fell to the floor. “I don’t _know_.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~Japanese lesson of the day~
> 
> 日曜日 - nichiyoubi - sunday   
> 日 - hi - sun (one of many readings) 
> 
> Same kanji, just different reading. It's one of the most common and simple ones (it's literally in the word JAPAN - 日本) which is why Daichi would be able to recognise it the same way a child could point to a picture in a book and say what it is. 
> 
> あ(a) い(i) う(u) え(e) お(o) are the first letters of the Japanese alphabet. However, the up thing was kind of a small joke because ue うえ (上) means 'up' (or more like above or on something). We don't really have any words like that would work like that - basically letters in the right order to form a word - in the English alphabet so I couldn't 'translate' it. IMPORTANT ASIDE - it's literally just a joke though like I'm 70% sure it's not grammatically correct in Japanese because that language has a lot of verbs and nuances I'm not going into. But hey, he's a baby. 
> 
> ~end of Japanese lesson~ 
> 
> So! I hope you enjoyed this one! Next chapters... gonna be your Christmas present! But it's very painful. Like, VERY painful. So gear up. Heh. 
> 
> As always, I love your comments and feedback!


	62. End Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Be careful what you wish for~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING!!! If you’re a person that gets easily triggered (though I will say it’s not related to mental health in any way) I fully suggest skipping to the end, where I’ll summarise what happens in this chapter. Please keep those warnings in mind and read this one at your own risk. 
> 
> That being said, Merry Christmas, ya' filthy animals.

Nagisa’s life became a weird lull, almost, where every seemed to be okay but for some reason he just felt like it wasn’t. Even if exams were rapidly approaching them again, things were mostly happy. Ever since their ‘outing’ together Rin had been far more affectionate than usual. If they were going anywhere together, he always made to hold Nagisa’s hand nowadays. He also seemed to want to kiss and hug him a _lot_ more. Any sane person would have been overjoyed.

He wasn’t so sure how to feel about the change. Maybe Rin was just stressed, because his entrance exams were so close, literally setting the course for his life. So, Nagisa tried his best to just go along with it, though he kept having to silently reinforce some kind of boundary, since Rin didn’t really seem to know when to _stop_. It wasn’t so bad he couldn’t put up with it, though.

“I’m _bored_ ,” Rin said, putting his book down pathetically.

Nagisa looked up from his own work with a smile. “You should still study.”

“But you’re so much more interesting,” he complained, moving over to kiss Nagisa on the cheek. When Nagisa didn’t respond immediately, he moved closer, pressing more kisses closer and closer until he caught the corner of Nagisa’s mouth. Nagisa could already see him completely forgetting the work he was supposed to be doing.

Shifting away, he gave Rin a look. “You want to be accepted into university, don’t you?”

“You’re right, you’re right,” he resigned. “I mean, I know you’re kind of a distraction, but are you still going to help me sort everything next week? I’m free on Tuesday.”

“I can’t on Tuesday,” Nagisa realised. “My heat’s due around then so I’ll be at home.”

Like that, the atmosphere grew frosty. “At home?”

Nagisa swallowed. “No different to always.”

“I just don’t get why you would,” he said, looking almost kind of mad. “Why don’t you just spend it with _me_? It’s not like we don’t love each other, right?”

His throat ran dry. There were so many reasons he could think of. Though Rin did seem to get more intense with the kissing recently, they hadn’t done anything like _that_. And Nagisa wasn’t sure if he even wanted to. With the exception of that one time Rin offered to _help_ _him_ before, he’d never even really thought about it.

“R-rin-“

“I mean,” he continued. “It’s weird enough that you stay at home with your alpha roommate. Like what am I or anyone else supposed to think?”

Nagisa’s brow creased. “You think I’d cheat on you?”

He exhaled heavily. “No, I don’t think that. It just doesn’t make sense to me. Do you even love me?”

Feeling a little bit funny, Nagisa realised he was shaking. He knew what he was _supposed_ to say, the right answer to that question. Two people who’d been dating for as long as they had were _meant_ to be in love with each other. And Rin had been saying ‘love’ a lot lately. Nagisa still hadn’t figured out how he felt completely. All he knew is it wasn’t the same as what he felt for Karma, what he’d so easily called ‘love’ before. But there had to be different kinds of love, or maybe he was just wrong before.

“Yes,” Nagisa finally said, afraid of anything different. If he didn’t, then Rin surely _would_ break up with him this time.

“Then prove it! I don’t see what the problem is!” He paused for a second. “It’s not like you’re a virgin.”

Nagisa felt _that_ comment like a stab to the chest. Technically, he wasn’t, but he had no recollection of it. He barely even counted it internally. And sleeping with Rin whilst in heat, where everything seemed to blur into one giant mess in his head, wouldn’t be much better.

“But I wouldn’t even remember it,” Nagisa thought aloud.

“Oh,” Rin said, the anger dropping from his tone, “I see now. You should have just said something! Actually, my parents are going on a trip out of town tomorrow. You could come over then?”

Nagisa wasn’t sure what to make of that. “W-what?”

There was no point in asking, though. Unfortunately, Nagisa knew exactly what Rin meant. He also knew that he couldn’t get out of it now. There weren’t any excuses he could make that would help him. Even if he was aware he physically could say no, something within him froze, like he couldn’t quite express that.

“I don’t really get the house to myself often,” Rin actually answered. “There aren’t many other opportunities.”

“Okay,” he forced out.

He pressed a less intense kiss to Nagisa’s lips, apparently satisfied. Like nothing had happened, like it wasn’t a big deal. Maybe Nagisa had it wrong, and he needed to stop seeing it as one. This was normal, expected of them probably. It was just the shock that was shaking him, surely. Rin just went back to his studying, whilst Nagisa stared aimlessly at the words on the page, not being able to take any of them in.

With the school day nearly at an end, they eventually said their usual goodbyes, despite the prospect of ‘tomorrow’ looming over him. Nagisa didn’t have a lot of time to think about it after that fortunately, busy with the rest of his daily routine like picking Daichi up and taking care of him when they got back home.

Nagisa didn’t even think about Rin again until much later. But of course, Daichi demanded a lot of attention, so it was easy to forget. It had become a regular thing now for him to sit with Nagisa when he did his homework. As always, Nagisa gave him a few pieces of paper and pens, though he wrote five letters on one of them. Convinced Daichi had pretty much mastered the first ones he was taught, they’d moved onto the next five letters. He picked them up just the same as before, though he had a little difficulty saying ‘ke’ right when it was on its own. It wouldn’t take them too long to get through the entire alphabet at this rate, though Nagisa didn’t know where to take it from there. Maybe trying to get him to string them together? But he wasn’t sure if that was pushing way too far.

Whatever the case, Daichi enjoyed it _now_ , and Nagisa enjoyed teaching him. Though, like always, he did eventually get tired and randomly started scribbling instead. When Karma came in with food, it was the _clear_ winner. Not that Nagisa minded, because he was pretty hungry too, and he always enjoyed Karma’s cooking. Well, except the times he dumped ridiculous amounts of spice on the meal, but that was few and far in between.

“D-do you mind picking Daichi up tomorrow?” Nagisa plucked up the courage, about halfway into his food.

Karma looked up at him. “I mean, sure? How come?”

What was Nagisa supposed to say? ‘Hey do you mind looking after our child because my boyfriend wants to sleep with me and I’m too chicken to say no’? This was a hugely uncomfortable conversation to have with anybody, let alone _Karma_. Even though he hadn’t physically saying anything, Nagisa was somehow petrified that Karma knew exactly what he was thinking around.

“ImightsleepoveratRin’s,” Nagisa finally got out, exhaling deeply once it was pulled for him.

Though he hadn’t known what to expect, Karma looked apathetic. “Okay?”

That was good, right? He should be happy, with that weight off his chest. But Nagisa wasn’t. He could even admit to himself he’d wanted Karma to be busy or something. At least that way Nagisa could make an excuse that wasn’t just his own inadequacies.

“Okay?” He tried, his voice small, just to give Karma another opportunity.

He squinted. “What, did you want me to say no?”

Damn it, was Nagisa that easy to read? “No!”

“Nagisa,” he leant forwards in his seat, “you’re okay, aren’t you?”

“I’m _fine_ ,” Nagisa denied, and pushed his plate away, unable to stomach another bite.

Karma shrugged, like he wasn’t going to pursue it further. Nagisa just stared at the table, after that, until Daichi proudly declared he was done with his food. Since Karma had cooked, it was only fair that Nagisa cleaned up. Quite the task, since Karma didn’t know the meaning of ‘clean as you go’. At least it was easier than trying to wrestle Daichi to clean his face.

He lost himself in his own domestic routine until the next time he was alone. Usually, a nice warm shower would relax him, but it just made him feel more on edge. When he stepped forward to grab his towel, he caught a sight of himself in the mirror and immediately deflated. He didn’t get why Rin was so eager, he was nothing special. His body bordered on _grotesque_. He hated his lanky arms, how wide his hips were compared to his small waist, his too round face. His stomach was absolutely covered in red and angry stretch marks that never went away. It was a constant reminder that his body would never go back to looking _normal_.

Maybe he could leave his shirt on. He wouldn’t actually have to take it off, really, would he? Nagisa turned away from his reflection, ashamed that he didn’t have much of a clue. Even if he wasn’t a virgin, it stood only as a technicality. Nagisa still didn’t remember a _thing_ about sleeping with Karma, except feeling sore the next morning. He didn’t know what to _do_.

He tossed and turned that night, rest unable to find him whilst he was freaking out so badly. The small amounts of sleep he _did_ get were unsettled, like he was half conscious the entire time. Morning came just as he felt himself starting to go insane, signifying most of his time for thinking was up.

Nagisa wasn’t sure what to bring, even. Although he’d told Karma he was sleeping over, Rin hadn’t specifically said anything about that, so bringing an overnight bag felt a little off. He decided to just throw a few of the essentials in his school bag, like a toothbrush and clean underwear. Speaking of, Nagisa didn’t know what to _wear_. He cursed himself for not owning anything that wasn’t just plain, but he’d hardly been expecting to have to make this choice. And then he remembered that it didn’t really matter, because wasn’t the point to take it _off_?

Leaving for school that day felt akin to walking to his own funeral. Perhaps it was a good thing, then, that he didn’t actually see Rin during the day. It was hard enough to focus on his work as it was, and it would probably have just made it worse. Nagisa wondered if his friends knew what he was thinking, if they noticed. Nobody said anything, though, or called him out for acting weird. And then, when the final bell rung out and he went out into the corridor to meet Rin, his time was up.

“Hey,” he greeted with a kiss to Nagisa’s cheek, and a half hug. “Good day?”

Nagisa nodded, feeling every urge to hurl himself out of the window. Not that that would really help him. Rin waved goodbye to his friends, and then took a hold of Nagisa’s hand. He was tethered in that way, following along where Rin lead him. But Nagisa didn’t feel so secure in his own mind, as Rin talked about his day. This was still casual for him. It was _supposed_ to be casual, though, wasn’t it? It was then that Nagisa realised with a sinking feeling that just because this was the _first_ time, it wasn’t just a one time thing.

He’d been to Rin’s house before, a few sparing times. It was pretty normal, maybe a little nicer than the average home for the area. After taking his shoes off, though, it seemed there wouldn’t be much time to take it in. Rin took his hand again, as though he was afraid Nagisa would slip out of his grip, and started taking him straight upstairs.

Nagisa had hoped for a little bit more time to gather his thoughts, but maybe it was better to get it over with as soon as possible. Rin certainly wasn’t wasting any time, laying a kiss on him before his bedroom door was even all the way opened. Compared to some of the more recent times Rin had kissed him, though, it wasn’t as rough.

Ordinarily, Nagisa would have pretty happy about that. Normal kisses he was fine with, but the anticipation burned under his skin. Rin’s fingers hooked underneath the fabric of his jacket, as if to push it off, which Nagisa reluctantly helped him to do. His hands seemed to slide down with it, fixing on Nagisa’s waist as he pushed him further into the room. They only slid lower, moving down to grasp his butt. He tried his best not to react and flinch, logically knowing he was about to do a lot worse.

He let go, gently guiding Nagisa down as he did so, so he ended up sitting on the bed. Rin didn’t keep his momentum going, instead squatting to around the same height. At that point, the kiss had to break, due to need for air. Not that he thinking clearly regardless, Nagisa’s attention drifted around the room, which seemed both huge and tiny at the same time.

“I messed your hair up,” Rin reached for one of the loosened strands, tugging it between his fingers. Though he probably didn’t do it on purpose, it was enough to make his ties fall out, the rest of his hair coming with it.

“Oh,” Nagisa let out, unsure of how to respond.

Rin brushed it out of his eyes, cupping his cheek. “You’re beautiful like that.”  

But he didn’t _want_ to be. Nagisa tried to ignore the sick feeling in his stomach when Rin moved in to kiss him again. This time, his lips met his jaw, and then moved down to his neck. Though he felt no submissive urges, Nagisa still tilted to allow him the access. It turned out to be an error of judgement, because then he was kissing his scent gland. Even if he’d tried, it was impossible to hold back his flinch, automatically pulling away.

“Are you sensitive there or something?” Rin blinked.

Nagisa didn’t have a good explanation. Maybe it was because Rin was a beta, and just wouldn’t _get_ it. There were some things Nagisa could deal with, but right on the scent glands implied a lot more than just a kiss. When Nagisa didn’t respond, Rin just took it as a signal to touch it again, first with his fingers, and then again with his lips. Even though he was prepared, Nagisa just squeezed his eyes shut and bore it. A good tactic for the rest of the evening maybe. Despite his efforts to remain calm, his limbs begun shaking, but Rin seemed to mistake that for pleasure.

Without much other warning he was pushed back, so he lay flat out on the bed. This time, Rin actually did follow him down, kicking his legs apart so they were spread. He returned to a normal kiss again, which thankfully meant he couldn’t really see the way Nagisa’s face reddened as hands brushed against his thigh. More from inexplicable shame than arousal.

He’d thought that despite his uncertainties, he’d at least be able to relax when he actually got to it. Perhaps Nagisa was being ridiculous. He was here, with his boyfriend of a pretty significant amount of time, who was currently all but grinding on top of him. He should be _extremely_ turned on. But he felt a kind of emptiness, and it was deafening him. At least he didn’t have to do much, pliantly providing his warmth should be enough to keep Rin happy.

“S-slow down,” Nagisa finally said, albeit very softly, when his hand shifted down his front. He needed time to adjust, lest he freak out and accidentally hurt him.

But Rin didn’t seem to hear him, fingers continuing their path, fiddling with the button of his trousers.

“Rin,” Nagisa tried to warn again.

Lips plastered at his neck again, he felt them stretch into a smile against his skin. Did he think Nagisa was saying his name in a good way? Nagisa’s heart rate began to pick up, unsure of where to find his voice from.

Instead, he tried moving one of his arms, lightly giving Rin a little shove in hope’s he’d get the message. “Really!”

“Mm,” Rin said into his neck, “quit moving.”

His free hand moved quickly, taking Nagisa’s arm and holding it down. He was sure it was meant to be a playful gesture, but Nagisa felt the thrums of threat. It didn’t seem to matter, though, the other hand returning to its task. Like of a sudden moment of clarity, Nagisa knew with his entire being that he didn’t want this to happen anymore.

“Stop,” Nagisa _finally_ found the will buried deep within him.

He thought it would be clear enough. Rin sure enough did move his hand, but now instead of attempting to strip him he palmed him through his trousers. Of course with the frenzy building inside his head, it didn’t feel good at all. Nagisa just felt more ill, more like he was suffocating.

“Stop!”

But once again, he didn’t. And Nagisa’s body only one option left, to go into do or die mode. It wasn’t a case of thinking anymore, everything shut down, and he just had to protect himself. Adrenaline rushing through him, he yanked his hand free, slamming both together right in front of Rin’s face. Moving so fast Nagisa was going purely on his instincts, that second or so paralysis from the shock was enough to flip their positions. Almost expertly, Nagisa was on top of him, holding him in place with his thighs, and his hands locked around his throat.

There was a certain kind of confused terror in Rin’s eyes. Not entirely back to himself yet, Nagisa had every urge to apply real pressure, to choke him until his last breath. Right then, it was the most natural course of action, what he was built for. But even so, somewhere in the back of his head, something screamed at him not to do it. Not loud enough to drown out the forefront completely, but enough to be heard. So he did the only other thing he could, and fled.

Rin didn’t try to stop him as he quickly grabbed his jacket and bag, even if he did manage it in mere seconds. Nagisa practically flew down the stairs, not bothering to put his shoes on properly before exiting the house. Even then, there wasn’t time to stop in his mind. Nagisa just kept walking, onwards and onwards. It felt like the only thing to do until he got home. He didn’t look back over his shoulder even once.

“Nagisa?” Karma asked, confused clearly at the sight of him. “I thought you were sleeping over.”

Finally, he exhaled deeply, and everything came rushing back in. Nagisa had nothing to say to Karma, nothing he’d be able to produce anyway. There was a lot he maybe wanted to say, but it all caught in the back of his throat. He did the only logical thing, then, and continued on straight to his bedroom, refusing to meet his eye. All he had left now was the comfort of curling up in his own bed and pretending like the day never even happened.

Until a knock came at his door. “Seriously, Nagisa, what gives? Don’t make me stand here all night~”

Nagisa didn’t want to deal with this right now. He got up from his bed, fully intending to just tell Karma to leave him alone. When he opened his door, though, he locked eyes with Karma, and simply crumbled. There were no tears, but he clung to Karma like he was his lifeline. Karma didn’t touch him back at all, which Nagisa was ridiculously grateful for.

“H-he, he-“ Nagisa tried to respond, since he’d asked, but he couldn’t drag the words out of him.

That had been the wrong thing to say, because Karma was pulling back, fire in his eyes. “He did _what_?”

Suddenly Nagisa was very afraid. Even though he hadn’t said anything, he could already physically feel the waves of fury coming from Karma. He didn’t know why, exactly. It wasn’t anything to do with him, aside from being his friend of course Karma didn’t need to be getting so angry just for his sake. But the atmosphere was clear, and it only made Nagisa feel more on edge.

“Karma, it’s okay-“

He seemed to loom over him. “I’m going to assume the worst unless you tell me otherwise.”

Nagisa crumpled. “H-he d-didn’t stop, a-and h-had my arm, and I almost killed him!” It came back in flashes, every scene just as bad as it had felt in the moment.

Admitting that out loud made Nagisa feel sick. He’d been too sure of himself, what felt like years ago now, when he’d declared he was considering a career in assassination. Killing Korosensei had been different, more earnest, and Nagisa hadn’t been acting alone. But this… holding a fresh life in his hands, so ready to just _take_ it. Nagisa was very scared.

“Did he touch you.” It didn’t sound like much of a question, with how dark his tone was.

Nagisa said nothing, and apparently that was enough of an answer. Inexplicably, a tear ran down his cheek, and his body begun to tremble. He wasn’t sure why he was crying, other than a kind of shock maybe, but once he’d started they didn’t stop coming. Something in the air shifted. If Karma was bothering to try and hide his rage laced scent, he wasn’t doing a good job, but there was something else there that made Nagisa feel like he was safe here.

Karma’s jaw clenched. “You’ll be okay here for a little bit?”

He’d been friends with Karma since they were twelve, and basically in his constant company for the last two years. He knew the look that was across Karma’s face, far too well. It was how he looked when he was about to kill someone, and suddenly Nagisa was afraid again.

“Don’t do anything,” Nagisa begged, the tears still fresh in his eyes. He lunged to grab Karma’s arm, as if that would hold him back. “ _Please_ , Karma.”

He looked down at Nagisa. “Why not?”

It was a challenge. He was waiting for Nagisa to give him a good reason, something to stop whatever he was planning. Nagisa could think of plenty, but he _knew_ Karma. He knew that nothing he could say would be good enough when it came down to it. Karma already has his mind set, and it would be near impossible to change it.

“Stay with me,” he asked instead, voice barely above a whisper.

Karma looked him up and down once again, before wrapping his arms around his body.

* * *

Karma was in over his head. He wasn’t built for situations like this, that required tact and comfort. If he didn’t hit something, specifically Rin ( _hard_ , and right in the liver), he was going to go insane. Still, for Nagisa’s sake, he tried his best to keep himself at bay. Hard, when every inch of his body was screaming out for blood. The fact that Nagisa didn’t have any physical injuries to speak of was the only thing working in his favour. 

He didn’t know exactly what had happened, since Nagisa was so reluctant, or maybe completely unable to spit it out. But Karma could put two and two together, and that gave him enough of the story. He should have just warned Nagisa. Of course, he’d only had the displeasure of meeting Rin once, and that had felt off. Namely at the way he passionately kissed Nagisa, locking eyes with him the entire time. Which obviously had to mean something, because Nagisa was a good kisser. At the time, of course, he’d just found it kind of funny, pathetic that he felt the need to piss a circle around Nagisa, like that was some kind of threat. He didn’t think he’d have taken it this far.

At some point, Nagisa had stopped crying, though he still shook in his arms. It would be even worse, Karma knew, to just leave him like this. Even though Karma had frankly never been good at comforting people, and he wasn’t about to learn. All it seemed Nagisa wanted to do was hold onto him, though, and Karma could at least _stand_ _there_. Until time begun to cease meaning, it seemed.

“I’m just going to put Daichi to bed,” Karma said gently, remembering that fact.

Nagisa seemed reluctant, but he let Karma go, slipping out the door. Thankfully, in the time he’d been in Nagisa’s room, Daichi didn’t seem to have got himself in too much trouble. He was getting a lot better at amusing himself with his own toys nowadays, though Karma still found he couldn’t sit in the room for ten minutes with him without Daichi begging him to play with those sad, wide eyes of his. Not that he _minded_.

“Alright,” Karma eventually said. “Time to go to bed.”

Daichi turned around and looked at him blankly. “No.”

“Oh really?” Karma raised an eyebrow. “How come?”

“Tidying, Papa,” he explained. “No bed.”

Karma just stood there and let him carry on for a moment. If he actually was cleaning, then it made Karma’s life a little easier. By the looks of it, he actually was, though he was being meticulous about it. He knew that Daichi was bound to be slower at picking up his toys than someone older than him, but this was ridiculous. At the pace he was going, they’d be there all night.

“You’re _clearly_ stalling, Daichan. Come _on._ ”

“ _Have_ t’tidy,” he complained.

He sighed. “I’ll clean up the rest of it.”

“No!”

Okay, that was _it_. “This isn’t a negotiation.”

“Yes is,” he mumbled.

“You don’t even know what that means,” he said, forcefully picking Daichi up. He didn’t seem to like this very much, almost instantly bursting into tears. “Not you _too_.”

So apparently Daichi had indeed won the negotiation, because Karma was not in the mood to deal with _more_ crying in one day. His tears instantly dried up when he was put back down again. So, he let Daichi return to his ‘cleaning up’. He tried to help him, just to speed things up, but then Daichi gave him a look that could only be described as the stink eye.

“All done,” Daichi finally turned around with a huge grin plastered across his face. Only about half toys had actually been put away.

Karma raked a hand down his face in emotional exhaustion. “Does that mean you’re ready for bed?”

“Mmm, no!”

“Too bad,” Karma said, feeling the irritation burn back. “You’ve got to be tired by now.”

Daichi yawned. “No sleepy.”

He didn’t actually argue when Karma picked him up again anyway, taking him right into his bedroom. Daichi could claim what he wanted, he was so sluggish Karma had a hard time even getting him into his pyjamas. He was pretty sure Daichi didn’t have the energy after that to try and get up again, which was good enough for him. He sighed happily, when he was actually put down.

“Night night.”

Daichi didn’t respond to him, which was good enough to mean his job was done. He stretched out, closing the door most of the way behind him, and took in the sight of their apartment. He’d sort it out tomorrow morning or something. Right then, that had taken a while, and he figured Nagisa needed to know he was actually coming back.

When he entered his room again, Nagisa was curled up on the bed, having stripped off to just his boxers and a t shirt, looking out of the balcony doors that acted as a window. Something caught in Karma’s throat. He could tell he was still awake, just from the way he was breathing, but he was silent otherwise. Karma had been a _while_ … He wondered if Nagisa still wanted him close.

“Nagisa,” he tried, questioning if Nagisa had even heard him enter. He didn’t react to his voice, though.

Even if Karma had been desperate to just leave him to it, the laces of distress poisoning Nagisa’s scent made it almost impossible to turn away. He decided to try what had worked best earlier, and just hold him. Slowly and carefully, he came over to the bed, and laid himself down on it. Nagisa made no objection to his presence, though he didn’t acknowledge it either.

After a minute or so, Nagisa turned over onto his back. Even though the room was pretty dark, Karma could see his eyes were open, fixed blankly on the ceiling. He didn’t move any closer, leaving that decision up to Nagisa. If only he could tell what he was thinking. Karma almost fell asleep like that, when Nagisa finally turned over again, locking eyes with him directly.

His scent grew sweeter than before, which at least showed he was more relaxed. Neither of them said anything, though, and the silence grew heavier with every passing second. If Karma had been a better person, he might have been able to find the right thing to say to Nagisa then, but his brain didn’t supply anything worthwhile.  Nagisa looked like something was on the tip of his tongue, but he remained soundless.

Nagisa moved quicker than Karma could anticipate, so he was wholly unprepared when suddenly Nagisa’s lips were there, sliding against his. It was surprisingly gentle, despite his speed. With this not even being in the _realm_ of possible ‘actions that Nagisa may or may not take’, Karma was shocked, eyes still wide open. But Nagisa didn’t pull away, either, cupping the back of Karma’s head with his hand.

There was a logical part of Karma’s brain that knew what this was a bad idea, but it was drowned out. It was hard to think clearly, when someone he’d loved for so _long_ , but never been able to have, was kissing him. Nagisa’s scent only became sweeter still, intoxicating him completely. Even if it was awful of him, there was nothing Karma could have done to prevent himself from returning the kiss with vigour, clutching Nagisa back.

Nagisa keened into it, taking on the magnified passion. It didn’t take long for the kiss between them to deepen. His inner alpha jumped the gun, then, gums beginning to swell as his canines extended. Not a lot he could do about it, he bit lightly on Nagisa’s bottom lip, though not hard enough to actually break the skin. Even though he had no intent to bond him, Nagisa shuddered at the suggestion, a half whine escaping from his throat. If he could, Karma would have played it on repeat for _days_.

When Nagisa’s hand came to his shoulder, pushing him so he’d be flat on his back, he didn’t protest. Nagisa followed him, now lying on top of him to continue the kiss from a different angle. Not that he weighed much. Though, maybe just from discomfort, he quickly moved his legs apart, so his knees were planted either side of Karma’s thighs. Though Karma could have pushed him off if he really wanted to, he felt deliciously trapped under Nagisa’s hold.

Their kissing went on like that, though it intensified with every second. Karma let his hands grab Nagisa’s back, pressing him close, though he made sure they didn’t drop lower than that. There was a reason, he knew, but it escaped his mind in that second… As much as his now _very awake_ cock would have liked it. There was no hiding anything between them, their bodies were so tightly wound together, he could tell Nagisa was hard too.

Nagisa broke the kiss, instead moving his lips to his neck. Without warning, he zoned in on his swollen scent gland, sucking it between his lips. Karma had done it to _him_ before, when he was in preheat and had barely been able to control his own urges. He hadn’t realised its effect on him would be so… potent. Without Nagisa’s mouth to silence it, his moan rung out loud and clear. He’d be embarrassed, maybe, but then Nagisa dug his teeth in.

He was an omega, of course, so it wasn’t like he could _actually_ bond them. As much as the implication was definitely there. Maybe most people would be ashamed in his position, but Karma didn’t have time to think about the social implications. The sound it drew out of him wasn’t one he’d made before. It was all Karma could do to resist biting Nagisa back, returning the favour.

Nagisa pulled back, once again. Karma was ready for another kiss, but instead he shifted completely, going up on his knees to sit up properly. He was panting heavily, face flushed, looking down at Karma through lidded eyes. It was just about the hottest thing Karma had ever seen. But then he shifted his hips, grinding their crotches which were conveniently lined up together.

“K-karma,” he sighed, rolling his hips again. “Ah!” 

Karma’s brain just about short circuited. Because on top of moaning his name, Nagisa raked a hand through his still down hair, pushing it up and out of his face. He tilted his head back at the same time, displaying his neck. Karma burned. Unable to really control himself, he sat up as fast as he could, pulling Nagisa’s head down so their lips connected messily once more.

Moaning into the kiss, and shifting his hips desperately again, Karma could tell Nagisa didn’t mind it. His scent took over everything else, intensifying with every second. Karma felt a kind of heat beginning to burn underneath his skin, his own instincts completely clouding his actual sense. If he didn’t do anything, he was going to go insane. Quickly, he grabbed a hold of Nagisa, and flipped him so he was on his back.

“Alpha,” Nagisa breathed, extending his neck from its already provocative position.

Honestly, even in Karma’s wildest fantasies, he hadn’t envisioned Nagisa being like _this_. Nagisa was a _lot_ of things, but naturally submissive was not one of them. It took him aback, quite a bit. The only time Nagisa had ever referred to him as ‘alpha’, he’d been practically in heat. _Heat_. The spike of fear that shot through his entire body was just about enough to give him a moment of clarity. He should have recognised this scent, far beyond regular arousal, before.

Immediately, Karma forced himself away, falling off the bed as he did so. He only had seconds before he forgot all over again. Nagisa didn’t know what he was doing, probably not even who Karma _was_ , and wasn’t that just as bad as what had already happened to him? As the only measure he could think of to kill his urges was biting down on his own hand, hard. Nagisa barely looked conscious, though he seemed somewhat confused, until he realised that he was now alone.

“W-wait!” The amount of sheer begging in his tone almost broke Karma’s heart.

Karma couldn’t even choke out an apology, rushing out of the room before he did something they’d both regret. The impossible scent carried out into the hallway, which wasn’t ideal. Still filling his senses, he had half the mind to go back in there and, well, thinking about _that_ wasn’t helping his problems.

It took actually looking down at himself to realise where it was coming from. His shirt and trousers were _soaked_ , both from sweat, and what appeared to be other fluids. With how strong Nagisa’s scent clung to it, he knew it had to be slick, which apparently had soaked through Nagisa’s underwear at some point during that. His knees grew weak at the thought, so he punched himself in the face as hard as he could.

In the interests of not being an actual pervert, he stripped the clothes off immediately, practically rushing into the bathroom. He frowned at his erection, which had somehow withstood two rounds of self abuse and psychological torment. There was only one solution he could think of. He turned the shower on, winding the temperature down to minimum, before jumping in. It sucked just as much as he thought it would, but at least it did the job.

Finally, Karma was able to catch his breath again. Not that he could process whatever the hell had just happened at all. Clearly, Nagisa was in heat, but he wasn’t _supposed_ to be. So something had brought it on? Maybe stress? Karma hadn’t been paying much attention in those science classes, just enough to pick up the information he needed to do well on exams, but in rung a bell.

He froze when he came back out. Despite disposing of the clothes, and scrubbing Nagisa’s scent off him, it still lingered all over the place. Even though he’d diminished his arousal, it was about to come right back. And then Karma begun to panic, because he couldn’t stay here like that, lest something awful happen. But what else could he do? He couldn’t just leave Daichi here, since realistically Nagisa wouldn’t be up to looking after him.

Karma cursed himself, quickly pulling on some clothes before making a snap decision. It didn’t feel like there _was_ another choice, or way to go. He had to get out. As quietly as he could, he pushed the door to Daichi’s bedroom open, where he was still sleeping soundly. As he’d learnt from the episode of sickness he had, there were some things that woke Daichi instantly, and some things that didn’t. As long as he was careful… He managed to gently pick him up without waking him, getting him into a position that would end up with the least amount of jostling. At the same time, he picked up a bag they kept if they ever needed to take Daichi somewhere on short notice, just full of spare clothes and other essentials.

It was irresponsible, maybe, but far better than staying here. Once Karma closed and locked the apartment door, incredibly quietly, he realised he didn’t have much of a plan for where they were going. His heart hadn’t quite even calmed down yet, through that whole ordeal. Having Daichi certainly complicated matters.

Somehow, his feet ended up carrying him to Nagisa’s parents’ building. Maybe he was just on autopilot, but as places to take Daichi this late in the evening went, it wasn’t a bad shot. It was hardly the middle of the _night_. Karma swallowed, still remembering the buzz in code, and went right up to the apartment.

Fortunately for him, it was Nagisa’s father who answered his rather frantic knocks. “Karma kun?”

Karma tried his best to smile politely, he’d long since judged that Nagisa’s parents were probably people he’d rather be on the good side of, though under the circumstances it came off a little awkward. It wasn’t like he particularly cared what they thought of him, it didn’t _matter_ , but they were still Daichi’s grandparents. So, for _his_ sake.

“Can I put him down somewhere?” Karma didn’t hesitate to ask.

A little confused, Nagisa’s father nodded. “Sure, come in, just take him to Nagisa’s room.”

Miraculously, Daichi was asleep throughout that entire affair. It was odd, though, going back into that tiny room after so much time. It was a lot smaller than he remembered it being, actually. Most possessions had been removed from it, but there were still a few things that were Nagisa’s, here and there. There wasn’t a crib in there anymore, so Karma put Daichi down on the actual bed, deciding to just hope he wouldn’t move around vigorously enough to fall out of it. As much as he didn’t want to, he probably owed an explanation.

“Is Nagisa okay?” He asked, the second Karma emerged.

Karma nodded, this being a conversation he _really_ didn’t want to have with either of Nagisa’s parents. “It’s just heat.”

As predicted, the atmosphere was instantly pretty rough. Karma didn’t need to say anything more, at least, any further questions too uncomfortable. He seemed to understand what had happened, more or less, just from that. Karma tugged the collar of his shirt up, in an attempt to hide the bite mark now residing on his neck.

“Well,” Nagisa’s father said, “you can stay here for now. Hiromi shouldn’t mind.”

Karma shifted awkwardly where he stood. “I only really meant to drop Daichi off.”

“Of course not!” His face morph. “It’s far too cold to just be walking around outside alone, especially at your age. I insist!”

“Okay,” Karma said, and that was that.

He dismissed himself to Nagisa’s room once again, though he knew he wouldn’t be able to sleep before he even attempted it. His mind was too full, reliving the entire day all at once it seemed. As the hours seemed to pass, the more angry he got once again. Though a big part of it was at himself. But it was easier to turn it on something else.

Eventually, Daichi did wake up, though he was rightfully confused. “Papa?”

Karma forced a smile. “Hey there~. You slept for a long time.”

He didn’t actually question why he wasn’t at home, instead raising his arms in the same way he always did. Even though Daichi probably could have got himself down from the bed, Karma lifted him, placing him right down on the floor. Like some sort of animal wondering around unknown territory, he walked curiously across the room, pushing the door open.

“Gram’ma!” He immediately yelled, when he caught sight of Nagisa’s mother, who was apparently also already awake.

She looked a little surprised to be affronted so quickly, but at least picked a now very excited Daichi up and onto her lap.

“Would you mind watching him,” Karma forced himself to ask. “I have a place I really need to be for a few hours.”

“Good morning to you too, Karma kun,” she said, taking a sip of coffee.

“I’ll be back,” he assured.

Karma’s head was still pounding, beating down into his bones. Even if the physical manifestations of his anger had faded, it was still very much real inside him, perhaps more dangerous that way. But, without really planning too much about it, he found himself on a train to the next town over. This would be easier if it was a school day, but it was ridiculously easy to get personal information nowadays.

Sure enough, he didn’t really have to walk far, or wait long. He was fortunate enough that Nagisa had chosen to date someone with an active social life. Now just to play it off. Though they’d only met in person once, there’d been enough ice in that exchange for Karma to make his threat known. It was a public place, so he couldn’t do much. Still, he managed to catch Rin’s eye, and apparently that was enough to make him freeze.

“Fancy seeing you here!” Karma said, strolling right up to him with fake casualness.

He gulped, glancing around. “Good morning.”

 _Not so confident now_. “I think you and I should go find a nice quiet place to chat.”

“I-I’m kind of on my way to something-“ He looked around again, even though there was nobody to help him.

“It wasn’t a suggestion.”

Karma had already seen a pretty secluded side street a few paces down from there. It wasn’t perfect, but there weren’t a lot of people of people around anyway. He doubted anybody would be there to bother them. Like nothing was wrong, he walked beside Rin, leading him right where wanted him. The second he was in position, Karma had him slammed against the wall, holding him there with the back of his arm.

“Listen,” he tried to struggle, “whatever you think happened-“

“I don’t care,” Karma kept his tone light, “what you did. What I care about is what you’re _going_ to do. It’s not hard to remember. If you even _look_ at Nagisa again without his express permission - and trust me I’ll know -well, I’m not going to _tell_ you what’ll happen, doubt you can handle it. But you don’t want to find out.”

His eyes showed fear, but there was still a determined resilience underneath. “Is that meant to be a threat?”

Karma sighed, because maybe this could have been a lot easier if he just kept his mouth shut. Eh, who was he kidding? This would have happened regardless. His body was itching for blood, to set things right. Even looking at Rin pissed him off. His words were at least a little thought out, but he was obviously frightened. Pathetic. Nagisa sure knew how to choose them. He’d show Rin a real threat.

Not wanting to spend more time than necessary on this, his hand formed a first, and then he swung.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW FOR SEXUAL ASSAULT   
> Nagisa is hanging out with Rin when he mentions his heat again. Rin gets angry over Nagisa still wanting to stay at home, since he lives with Karma, and demands that he have sex with him to prove that he actually loves him. Not wanting to lose Rin or have another fight, Nagisa reluctantly agrees. The next day, he’s definitely having a lot of second thoughts, but still goes over to Rin’s place. 
> 
> Nagisa’s obviously uncomfortable with that they’re doing, but they don’t get too far before the touching gets too much and Nagisa asks him to slow down. When Rin ignores him, he tries again, another few times. Since Rin didn’t stop, Nagisa freaks out and uses his clap stunner to get away, though the assassin in him is tempted to kill Rin in the process. 
> 
> He goes home and straight to Karma for comfort. Karma’s not sure what to do, aside from let Nagisa hold on to him, and decides to just lie next to him in bed. Without much warning, Nagisa starts kissing him, and it all gets heated very fast. Just short of actually having sex, Karma realises that something’s off, and Nagisa turns out to have gone into sudden heat. 
> 
> Realising that Nagisa can’t really consent to what’s happening, Karma forces himself away, however Nagisa’s scent still messes with him enough that he has to leave. He takes Daichi off to Nagisa’s parents, just to watch him. Then, he goes to find Rin, and basically threatens him to never speak to Nagisa again. Just to prove his point, he then beats him up. 
> 
> \---- TW OVER ---- 
> 
> Well, Merry Christmas everyone! Thanks for 1000 kudos by the way, that's pretty unreal. My gift to you? Well, Rin and Nagisa's relationship is over! Isn't that just what you all wished for? Hehe.... 
> 
> I hope this chapter doesn't ruin your day! I mean, the sadist in me kind of does, but oh well! As always, love all your comments and feedback, please don't hate me too much! 
> 
> Just as an important note, this is gonna be the last chapter for a while, hence the length, and why so many chapters have been posted recently. I have my Japanese exam at the end of January and it's really important that I do well, so from now until then I'll be focusing on studying! Don't worry, though, I'm not gonna leave you forever on this cliffhanger.


	63. Discord Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nagisa does his best to process what happened to him

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember how I said I wasn't going to write and take a break and study and stuff? Apparently that was a lie... Oh well! 
> 
> I should mention that the trigger warning from last chapter still applies, it's not nearly as explicit but there's still discussion of sexual assault in this chapter

Time swirled around Nagisa like it wasn’t even real. He didn’t know how long he’d been in his room for, his memories were so blurry that it was more like one moment he was so out of his mind he barely knew where he was, and then the next he was mostly conscious. Nagisa hadn’t exactly gone back to normal, he didn’t think.

He knew he’d been in heat. That much was obvious, from the uncontrollable burn under his skin that had lasted for so long. But it was different. Not just going into it early, even though that threw him, but the actual sensations weren’t right. Nagisa hadn’t even been desperate to find release during it. In fact, he wasn’t sure if he’d even got off _once_. Instead of that, he knew all he wanted was his alpha to come back.

No, _Karma_. Even thinking of him in that kind of a way was bad news. But Nagisa simply couldn’t help whatever his body demanded. At first, the heat hadn’t been half as bad as it normally was. Not that Nagisa really remembered the start of his heats ever. But he knew it hadn’t been as _painful_ , and he wasn’t alone. But then suddenly that was ripped away, and it was like he went into shock. All Nagisa knew was he wanted Karma back, and he was going to scream and cry until he got it.

Despite his new found numbness, a part of him knew it was a good thing Karma left. If Nagisa had managed to get pregnant after having sex _once_ , outside of heat, then who knows what might have happened. Maybe they’d have twins or triplets or something crazy. A part of Nagisa’s head, something deep within him, _wanted_ that, the second he even thought of it. And it was freaking the rest of him the hell out. This was a dangerous path.

He couldn’t be angry. Even if he did have a reason to be, it was like his body just shut down any possibility of really feeling it. It had been _his_ fault anyway, hadn’t it? He had been the one to rush straight into Karma’s arms, to climb on top of him and do all of _that_. Nagisa couldn’t blame Karma for pushing him away. Why would he even _want_ Nagisa like that? Except, he’d been at least a little bit turned on, he remembered feeling _it_. That being said, heat pheromones would force that effect… Nagisa was an awful person, plain and simple.

When he finally heard a sound in the apartment, after so much silence, he jolted. Of course, Nagisa hadn’t really planned for the fact he would actually have to get up at some point. But, he knew, it would be better to just rip it off like a plaster. Reluctantly, Nagisa tugged on some clothes, and shuffled out into the living room.

Karma grinned at him sheepishly. “I thought you were dead in there.”

It transcended all reason, but Nagisa felt himself shake where he stood. “I’m sorry,” he hung his head low.

He squinted, as though he was confused, but then shrugged. “Your parents send their love or whatever.”

“My parents?” Nagisa questioned, but then it left his mind. Karma looked a little… off. Firstly, his hand not only looked bitten, but bruised around the knuckles. He’d been hitting something, and pretty _hard_. He’d also bruised his neck somehow. Nagisa squinted, realising with horror that those were. Especially right over his scent gland, where there was a discernible _bite_. Shameful. He wished he could take those marks back.

“Mmm,” he replied.

Nagisa gulped. “What happened to your hands?”

A smile that didn’t feel particularly authentic crossed his face. “Walked into a wall, anyway, Daichan missed you! Didn’t you, huh?”

Daichi was in his arms, of course, though he didn’t look too bothered about apparently being jostled about. Just looking at him made Nagisa feel at least a little bit better. Guilty about something else. Tentatively, Nagisa stepped forwards, taking Daichi from Karma’s arms into his own. No matter how bad Nagisa felt, taking care of Daichi had to be his first priority. He held him close, practically forgetting the rest of the world.

“Dada,” he hugged back.

Nagisa tried his best to look happy. “Did you have a good time?”

He nodded enthusiastically. “Gram’ma and gram’pa go!”

“You _went_ to Grandma and Grandpa’s?” He corrected softly.

“Yeah!” Daichi pulled away, wanting to look him in the eye. “Eated chocolate.”

“ _Ate_ ,” Nagisa corrected once again, and wondered why his parents had been dishing out chocolate of all things.

That was apparently enough. “Down now,” Daichi commanded.

Maybe he should start enforcing pleases and thank yous, Nagisa thought to himself as Daichi quickly scampered off to his own bedroom. Now that he was getting more confident with actual sentences, Nagisa thought it wouldn’t be too hard for him to grasp. And manners, unfortunately, were kind of a necessity of life. Then again, he and Karma were rarely polite with each other, so it could be an entirely foreign concept.

There was still a conversation to be had, especially now Daichi was off doing his own thing.

“Karma, I-“

He took a deep breath and looked at Nagisa was a neutral expression. “Don’t worry about it. You were in heat. It doesn’t matter.”

It _did_ matter, though. Nagisa was shaking once again, in a bad way. They could blame it all on his heat, sure, but Nagisa hadn’t been in heat during the first kiss, not really. Nagisa didn’t really know why, it was beyond logical explanation, but he knew he’d _wanted_ that. Or maybe he really hadn’t noticed his heat at all. Still, there was no way he could tell Karma that.

For reasons unbeknownst to him, Nagisa lowered his head. “You’re right.”

Karma narrowed his eyes. “What are you doing?”

He gulped. “I’ve had enough fighting. If that’s what you want, then I agree.”

“Why are you tilting your neck like that?” Karma’s tone was cold, as if he was considering throwing a punch his way any second.

Nagisa hadn’t even noticed that he was doing it, but Karma was right. He was extending it too, leaving his scent glands as exposed as possible. The thing was, he didn’t immediately want to return his posture to normal. An urge buzzed under his skin, like this was the right thing to do.

“I-I-“

“Maybe you should go rest some more,” Karma said seriously.

Nagisa lowered his head. “Okay.”

“No, wait,” Karma grabbed his wrist. “Not just because I said so.”

“Okay.”

His eyes narrowed. “Snap out of it!”

Nagisa took a few steps back, until his back hit the wall. It wasn’t as if Karma was cornering him or anything like that, in fact he hadn’t even moved, but Nagisa felt very much trapped. Under Karma’s slightly concerned gaze, he was beginning to choke. His hand reached around behind him, desperately feeling for the handle to his bedroom door.

What was _wrong_ with him? Even when he darted inside, alone once again, Nagisa couldn’t shake the feeling off. Even like this, Karma didn’t want him. He’d pushed Nagisa away, physically, and literally run off. Why would _anybody_ ever want _him_ anyway? Even in _heat_ , even as an omega… Nagisa didn’t know why he was going down this spiral, but there was no stopping him.

It hadn’t even taken him a weekend of being broken up to fall straight back into his feelings, pathetically. If he even _was_ broken up… He hadn’t actually said anything, to officially end their relationship. Unless almost killing him wasn’t enough. Internally, it definitely felt over. Well, if Rin ever found out about what he did with Karma, it would definitely be the end anyway.

Nagisa shuddered at the thought of it all over again. When he closed his eyes, all he could see was the haze of hands pinning him down. So Nagisa strained to keep them open, sliding down his closed bedroom door to the floor, staring into the darkness. He still smelt the sour aftermath of the heat lingering, despite having opened his window. But Nagisa hadn’t had it in him to shower yet.

He knew he couldn’t stay here forever. School was literally tomorrow… Nagisa wasn’t sure if he could even show his face. No, he knew he _had_ to. If he could force himself through the cusp of death multiple times, then he could certainly do this. He just… had to gather his energy. Forcing himself to his feet, Nagisa cracked the door open a little bit, thankfully to find Karma wasn’t out there.

Using all the skill of an assassin, Nagisa made his way into the bathroom. Once the water was on, soothing his muscles, he felt a little better. His body at least didn’t carry any evidence of the weekend’s events, not outwardly. It was like stepping into a warm cocoon. Though, Nagisa didn’t want to dwell on the feeling enough to take a bath, too.

It didn’t exactly feel _better_ , being clean, but at least he wasn’t just strewing in everything. He didn’t feel like talking to Karma, though. Even seeing him was a reminder of all that Nagisa wasn’t. It had happened before, hadn’t it? Back when they first met, Karma got bored of him after mere months of friendship, and then spent the next year and a half pretending he didn’t _exist_. The only reason they spoke at the start of their insane third year was due being thrown into such a crazy situation. And, after that, Nagisa had ended up pregnant.

“Dada!” Daichi exclaimed, when he noticed Nagisa standing at his door.

Life would be easier for him if he could just accept that. This _thing_ between he and Karma, it only existed because they were forced together by their own mistakes. When he really thought about it, there was no way they’d be so close, if it wasn’t from sheer obligation. It was artificial closeness, not something either of them would want under any other circumstance, surely? Of course, it was hard to ignore the very real pain in his chest that followed the thought of his feelings being complete fabrication.

But Daichi shouldn’t have to suffer because of that. Nagisa came in properly, sitting himself on the floor. Weirdly, it reminded him of birth. The instant he’d been handed Daichi, so much smaller and helpless back then, he’d forgotten all the pain it took to get him there. It was the same even now, just one look at his smiling face and the pain and complications of Nagisa’s mind vanished.

He played with Daichi for a little while, though he wasn’t completely invested in whatever games his small but kind of frightening mind cooked up. It would be nice, to be so carefree again. The realest in his mind knew that Daichi would grow up one day, it was _already_ happening, and then he’d have to experience real pain of his own. That didn’t stop Nagisa from dreading it.

“Read this book?” Daichi pointed, once his game had run its course.

Nagisa looked at where he was pointing. “Sure I will.”

Since his apparent strong interest in learning letters, Nagisa had invested in more books. Surprising, because more often than not it was Karma who bought things on a whim. Honestly, Nagisa worried they hadn’t done it enough when he was a lot younger. So, he was making up for it now. With the way Daichi yawned, he was probably due a nap anyway.

He read the first few pages out slowly, watching the way Daichi studied the words written there. Eventually, though, his focus tapered off, and he began to yawn before his eyes fell closed. Practically sitting on top of Nagisa, he didn’t have the heart to move him. In fact, within a few minutes Nagisa’s eyes finally grew heavy too.

Nagisa wasn’t sure how long he slept for. He woke up to Daichi’s impatient squirming, wrapped up in the way Nagisa had gripped onto him. For just a moment, Nagisa hugged him a little tighter, before letting go. As much as he wanted to just hide here with him, Nagisa knew he couldn’t.

The rest of the day passed and morning came before he even noticed it happening. Somehow, he mostly managed to avoid Karma entirely, even if that meant another empty, practically sleepless night. He didn’t want to do this. But Nagisa knew he may as well get it over with, pulling on that same school uniform.

As always, he went to say goodbye to Daichi, before Karma took him off to his nursery. He didn’t say anything to Karma, though, what would he even find to say? Nagisa flushed, though, at how his marks still bruised Karma’s neck. Of course, his uniform didn’t really cover them, and he couldn’t wear a scarf all _day_. Nagisa wouldn’t even show his face if the positions were reversed, though.

The atmosphere of school felt kind of odd, grey and intimidating. Still, he kept his head down, walking onto the grounds. All he had to do was get into the classroom, then he’d avoid all the things he was worrying so much about much. Even with his eyes on the ground, though, he couldn’t help but feel like everyone was watching him.

“Morning, Nagisa kun!” Higashi rushed up to him from behind. “How was your weekend?”

He jolted, but forced his shoulders to relax. “I-it was… busy?”

Higashi swallowed. “Just ignore them, okay?”

As they stepped into the building, Nagisa was about to question what she was on about. But then he realised it hadn’t been just a feeling. Everyone’s eyes set upon him, some less subtle than others. One girl, a first year, even took a step back. Like she was... afraid of him or something. He started to panic.

Nagisa nearly choked on his own breath when he caught sight of Rin, and not out of latent fear. It wasn’t like he was waiting for him, or anything, in fact he was just talking to a friend. Nagisa froze as they locked eyes. Rin looked… like he shouldn’t even be standing. Practically every inch of his skin was covered in varying shades of red, purple, and black. And that was only the skin he could _see_ , they seemed to continue under his clothes. One arm was in a sling, though it looked haphazardly done. His appearance, it was like he’d been beaten halfway to death.

“Nagisa kun,” Higashi said quickly, “come on.”

He allowed himself to be tugged by her, though the stares followed. “T-they think I did that?”

They entered their classroom, right over to their desks. “I think everyone knows you broke up,” Higashi said, “and those rumours about you… they’re still in the back of people’s minds.  If you didn’t do it, then maybe someone you know? Either way…”

If not him, then someone else… And then Nagisa remembered Karma’s anger, his bruised knuckles… Marks he could only really get from punching something. Some _one._ This _was_ Nagisa’s fault. Down to his own bones, he seethed. This wasn’t what he’d wanted. He didn’t had any solid proof, but it was far too much a coincidence. Karma could get _arrested_ for this. 

Now the way even his classmates looked at him made sense. Whatever Rin had done to him, though they probably didn’t know that, it didn’t matter. Nagisa never thought he’d be in this position, where people were _afraid_ of him. All he knew was he didn’t like it. Sickeningly, they were right, too. Part of the blame was certainly on his own head.

“Nagisa kun, a word?” Oshiro came and stood behind his desk. “Before lessons start.”

Higashi glared up at him. “Just leave him alone.”

“I-it’s okay,” Nagisa tried to reassure. He stood up, feeling nauseous as he did so. “What is it?”

He gestured with his head, just outside their classroom. Nagisa followed him, relieved that most of the people gathered in the hallways had made their way to their own lessons by then. At least this was semi out in the open, rather than some darkened corner somewhere.

“What are you doing?” Oshiro looked a little exasperated. “I’ve been trying to keep this whole thing at bay for weeks. Kuronuma hates your guts, you’re just giving him ammunition.”

“I _didn’t_ do it,” Nagisa begged.

“After I saw what you did to Kuronuma?” He shot Nagisa a look. “I don’t believe you. Just tell me the truth!”

Sweat began to form. Usually, Nagisa could at least tolerate his scent, at worst he was mildly off put by whatever alpha pheromones he came across. But _this_ , he felt sick. He didn’t think Oshiro was trying to alpha command him or anything, he was just angry and demanding, but Nagisa felt like he was choking. It was so wrong to be stood so close.

“N-nagisa? Are you okay?”

Nagisa spluttered in response, knees beginning to shake uncontrollably.

He swore under his breath. “I’m taking you to the nurse, jeez.”

It wasn’t like he had much of a choice. He could barely hold up his own weight, so he was doomed to go wherever Oshiro lead him. In an effort to help Nagisa even walk, he had a hand on him, but being so close, taking in more of his scent, only made him feel worse.

The nurse took one look at him. “He’s an omega, isn’t he?”

Oshiro nodded sincerely.

“Then step away from him!” She chided. He didn’t hesitate in obeying, and within seconds, Nagisa felt a little less like he was going to die. “It’s okay, you can leave him with me now. Thanks for taking him here.”

“S-see you later, Nagisa kun.”

The nurse turned to him seriously, and then tugged the collar of his uniform down. “No bond mark?”

“B-bond?” Nagisa just about got out.

She handed him a cup of water. “I’ve been working here for a lot of years. Teenagers of your age often make reckless decisions, I’ve seen it all. You’d have been here before if you were somehow allergic to alphas, which suggests to me you mated with someone.” The nurse looked him over curiously. “But no bond. You should see your doctor as soon as possible.”

Although he had caught his breath, he still felt the pain in his chest. “A doctor?”

The nurse looked at him sadly. “I’m no expert in the real medical intricacies of secondary genders. But mated omegas suffer without their alphas. Those side effects seem to be happening to you, regardless of your situation. My sister almost died from an improper bond, I don’t want to scare you but they can be quite serious. As for now, I think maybe it would be best if you went home.”

“N-no!” Nagisa stood up quickly. “I’ll be fine, really.”

She smiled. “Alright then.”

At least his friends, the people who sat close to him, were all betas. If he was truly unable to tolerate alphas, then he should be okay in their presence. It didn’t make any sense, Karma hadn’t been anywhere near his scent glands. There had to be something medically wrong with him, then, surely. He had to wait until the lunch break, going through all the possibilities in his head.

‘Improper bond’ was the first thing he googled, the second he was able to pull out his phone. It didn’t seem to fit, though. He scrolled through quickly, but most of it was about the alpha positioning the bite slightly wrong, or the omega being so distressed it just didn’t take properly. Perhaps Nagisa was distressed, but Karma _hadn’t_ marked him. If anything, it had been the other way around.

‘Will a bond form if an omega bites an alpha?’  

_It is impossible for an omega to bond an alpha. When an alpha marks their omega, the bond will affect both parties. The couple’s pheromones will mix and their bodies will accept each other as mates. Due to this process, only an alpha and omega can actually bond. Betas do not possess scent glands, and any attempt from an alpha/alpha or omega/omega couple to bond could end in brief illness for both parties, as their bodies force the unnatural process out._

                       -Dr Tanaka Jun, Head of Secondary Gender Dynamics at Tougyou University

‘What happens when an omega bites an alpha?’

**11,000,000 results, the first page of which mostly pornography.**

‘What happens when an “omega bites” an alpha?’

_Feral omega attacks local residence, arrested – Hakone News_

_Yesterday a crazed omega wreaked havoc on the outskirts of………….. she has not been identified………… attacked citizens with mad cries……….. somehow managed to bite an alpha in the process, marking him in the way an alpha would bond an omega……… reprimanded… During the time the omega was in police custody, she suddenly fell ill, screaming out for the very same alpha she attempted to mark. It seemed to all that she was acting as an omega abandoned by her mate, though this was of course impossible, and the alpha involved was unaffected. This strange illness didn’t last long, though, her symptoms lessening………. She will be sentenced…._

Nagisa was terrified. If he’d somehow bonded himself to Karma, if that was even _possible_ … He felt sick, and not from the surrounding alpha pheromones. It said in that article that the symptoms had faded, so he had to hope that would happen. This couldn’t be permanent, especially since Karma had done this to him. He was angry, so angry.

Even when school ended, and he picked Daichi up, he didn’t feel a lot better. Aside from the alpha problem, Nagisa felt this primal urge to return home. But that didn’t stop how mad he was. It was all he could do to keep calm until they actually reached it. As typical these days, Daichi rushed off the second Nagisa got his shoes off, so at least he didn’t have to play happy for too long.

He didn’t feel any joy to be back home, even if the scent of the place eased the tug of his stomach. But Karma was already there, and just looking at him made his blood boil. There was a weakness inside of him, too, that whispered that he wouldn’t be able to do this. But he forced it down.

“I need to talk to you,” Nagisa said directly. Though, he wasn’t sure what about. The apparent bond he now had or the fact that he nearly killed someone, it didn’t matter. “Alone.”

No matter what, he knew this was going to become an argument, and he didn’t want to have to expose Daichi to it. Most of Nagisa’s childhood memories of his parents together was fighting. Karma looked sceptical, but shrugged. Looking around, Nagisa decided to step out towards the balcony, which at least had a glass door so they weren’t leaving their son completely unsupervised.

“You promised me Karma,” he said, the moment the door was closed,

Karma tilted his head. “ _Huh_?”

“I told you to leave Rin alone!” Nagisa raised his voice, anger flowing out of him. “But at school today, he was beaten to a pulp!”

For a moment, Karma just stood there, as if he was trying to process it. “That idiot… He shouldn’t have shown his face.”

“S-so you’re not even denying it?” Nagisa’s voice came out a little small, almost like he wanted Karma to say he had no involvement.

“What do you want me to say?” He said seriously. “He only got what he deserved.”

“It looks like you almost _killed_ him,” Nagisa protested.

Karma’s golden eyes flashed. “What a shame that would have been.”

“You can’t mean that! What are you going to do if he tells someone?” Nagisa felt sick, imagining him being put in prison or worse. “I’ve seen you… reprimand people before, Karma, and it’s never been like this. You’ve never left anyone this badly injured.”

“Do you really not think I covered that?” He said it confidently, almost arrogantly. “He knows what’ll happen to him if he tells anyone, if he so much as goes to a hospital, or speaks to you again.”

“Y-you should have just left it.”

He looked him dead in the eye. “He hurt you Nagisa.”

All of Nagisa’s doubts came rushing forth. He didn’t want to admit to himself, everything that happened. Nagisa didn’t want to be helpless and innocent in this. In truth, he was sure he knew the person Rin really was, and it wasn’t that. Which meant he’d driven him that far. Nagisa had to take some of the blame.

“H-he didn’t do anything I didn’t agree to, though,” Nagisa stuttered. It’s my fault! I- I just panicked, and-“  

“Why would you defend something like that?!” Karma yelled, with the force of his body. “Maybe I _needed_ to take it out of your hands.”

“Everyone seems to think _I_ did it,” Nagisa pointed out.

Karma looked down at him. “ _You_?”

“Yes!” His voice also raised.

“Maybe you should be _thanking_ me for looking after you,” his voice lowered, cooler and more threatening.

“I can look after myself,” Nagisa affirmed.

The look Kama gave him chilled him to the core. Like he really didn’t believe him. Maybe because he was apparently more sensitive to it, but Nagisa could sense Karma losing his containment of his pheromones. That was right. In this situation, Karma was the alpha, and Nagisa was the omega. He should be overjoyed that Karma wanted to protect him, and yet… it felt so wrong.

“ _Can_ you? Look at you,” he gestured for effect. “Having the skill of an assassin won’t help you every time. You don’t even know how to stand up for yourself.”

Nagisa felt his own threads snap. “And why do you think _you_ have the right to?”

“Because you’re weak!”

He couldn’t stand it anymore. Anger overwhelming him, Nagisa threw a punch, as hard as he could, hurtling towards Karma’s face. Unfortunately, Karma’s reflexes where quick, and their height difference meant Nagisa was unbalanced at such an attempted. Easily, Karma caught his hand in mid air, stilling its motion. There was nothing Nagisa could do about physical strength, and Karma easily outmatched him.

 “So, that’s what you want?” Karma looked at his fist. “To fight me?”

“I want you to stop acting like I’m yours!” Nagisa used all of his force to yank himself out of Karma’s grip.

“Who threw themselves at who?” He said, with an almost sneer in his tone. “Who _begged_ for who?”

“Y-you’re the one that said it didn’t matter,” Nagisa felt his own shame rise. He was shaking, once again.

The tension fell from Karma’s face. “Nagisa-“

Heart pounding in his chest, Nagisa turned away. Thankfully, there was a door to his own bedroom directly from the balcony, and that door had a lock on it. Karma made no attempt at following him, though, so at least there was that. Nagisa tried his best to ignore the way his scent glands ached.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh dear. Oh dear. Oh dearrrrr. 
> 
> By the way! I would like to point out. Aino Rin? Not really just a name. It kind of sounds like the sentence ai no rin (愛の凛) which can kind of be translated as 'Rin of love', or 'love's Rin', but the kanji for Rin actually means 'cold'. With that in consideration, his name means 'coldness of love'. So like, you can't say I never warned you that bad things were going to happen... 
> 
> (the names in this fic are 50% foreshadowing and 50% laziness, and you'll never know which) 
> 
> Well, see you next time?


	64. Reconcile Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Christmas Day and Nagisa meets with an old friend

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> shady's back tell a friend

“Has anyone ever actually measured the level of your stupidity?”

Nagisa shifted in his seat. “Well-“

Shooting him a glare, Asano aggressively sipped his coffee. “Honestly, Nagisa kun.”

He looked down. “I didn’t come here just for insults.”

Asano’s face remained expressionless. “You came because you’re fighting with Akabane again- Don’t look at me like that, I have the misfortune of sitting next to him in class, I can tell when he’s in an off mood, and it’s usually to do with you. I almost feel bad about outscoring him in finals. Almost.”

It had been a while since their argument. In that time, Nagisa had hardly spoken to him, far less than he usually did when they weren’t on the best of terms. At the very most, now, it was only a few sentences a day. And they were exclusively about Daichi. Those conversations only happened when completely necessary anyway.

“I don’t hang out with you just because I’m upset with Karma.”

Asano took another sip of the coffee. “No?”

“You’re my friend,” Nagisa said, a soft smile on his lips.

“Dada! Dada!” Daichi came barrelling into his leg. “Got ouch!”

Nagisa sighed, picking Daichi up onto his lap. Inspecting him over, he didn’t have many obviously bad injuries. His hand, however, had a little red mark on it. There was an open wound, though it wasn’t very big or bleeding, right on his finger. By Nagisa’s best guess, it was probably just a paper cut, since he’d been colouring, nothing that would traumatise him for too long.

He looked down at Daichi. “It’s only a tiny cut.”

“Look, Gaga!” He stuck his finger out proudly. “Ouch.”

Asano leant back in his chair. “Well, then, you should be more careful.”

He tilted his head. “ _Why_?”

Daichi’s new favourite word. It seemed to be his response for almost everything, nowadays. Nagisa wasn’t sure if he even took in the answers he supplied, but he humoured him regardless. Most of the time, he seemed to nod and accept whatever he was told at least, if Nagisa was lucky. When he wasn’t so lucky, there would be a follow up ‘why’.

“I have to deal with Akabane all day every day,” Asano looked at Nagisa. “I’m not doing it with his stunt double.”

Nagisa sighed. “Why don’t you go find your colouring stuff and bring it back over here?”

“Kay!” Daichi scampered off.

“And whilst you’re at it,” Asano continued, “get him to stop with that nickname thing.”

“I can’t,” he said, honestly. “That’s just what he knows you as now.”

“You’re his parent!” Asano protested, but didn’t push it further.

Nagisa watched after him, as he tried to pick up the paper and a considerable amount of crayons. Since it was the school break, and he didn’t have to go to nursery, Nagisa didn’t think it would be good to just stay inside. For himself, either. Things between he and Karma were so bad that Nagisa would spend as much time out of their apartment as humanly possible. Lest he suffocate… A weak part of him even considered staying with his parents for a little while, though he knew he couldn’t really do that. Hmm, _weak_.

Asano cocked his head. “What is it now?”

“N-nothing,” Nagisa stared down at the table. “Things are just… _complicated_.”

His eyes narrowed. “I didn’t need you to tell me that. Just end whatever the fight is, and my suffering with it.”

Still not looking him in the eye, he thought about it. “Maybe I would, if Karma actually apologised.”

“You’d have more luck ending world hunger,” Asano leant forward. “You could always _motivate_ him somehow. I’d be happy to help.”

“Whatever you’re suggesting…”

Nagisa didn’t get to finish, since Daichi was done collecting his things at that point and Nagisa felt bad discussing plots in front of him. He picked Daichi up, lifting him so he was on his own chair. He hadn’t bothered trying to find a high chair for him, since he’d run off the second his eyes set upon a little children’s area.

Maybe there was some truth in Asano’s misguided suggestion, though. Waiting for Karma to get over himself and apologise could take _years_. That is, if Nagisa even wanted to make up. The effects of his ‘bond’ had thankfully worn off after about a week and a half, allowing him to at least be within speaking distance of an alpha without feeling queasy. If that was what being mated was like, then Nagisa couldn’t see himself ever partaking in it.

He shouldn’t _have_ to be the bigger person every time Karma was in the wrong, though. A part of Nagisa didn’t even care how petty it seemed, he just… wanted things to be different. He wasn’t so angry at Karma that he had no intent of making up with him. But if things were different, perhaps that would mean they wouldn’t be entirely true to themselves. 

“I think we should probably go now,” Nagisa said politely. “It was really nice seeing you again, Asano kun!”

Asano stood up from his seat. “I do mean it. Fix Akabane.”

Nagisa stiffened. “I’m not sure it’s my problem to fix.”

Letting Daichi down from the seat, Nagisa didn’t stop him from running along a few paces ahead of them. Out of earshot, but not so far Nagisa couldn’t lunge out and grab him if anything happened. He envied that Daichi got to be innocent to all of this, or that’s what Nagisa hoped he was. There was no real knowing how much he actually picked up.

“You’re practically in love with each other, aren’t you?” He rolled his eyes, noticing the way Nagisa’s breath caught. “I don’t _care_ about the ins and outs of your relationship.”

“Is this advice then?” Nagisa gathered himself for a moment. “Karma doesn’t have those kind of feelings for me, he made very clear. At best he just wants to _possess_ me or something for the sake of it.”

Asano didn’t miss a beat. “He does, legally.”

A chill ran up his spine. “What do you mean?”

“You signed bonding papers, didn’t you?” He said easily. “Regardless of being physically mated or not, it’s irrelevant in the eyes of the law.”

“We’ve had those for nearly two years. He hasn’t even mentioned it since the day we signed them.”

Asano looked at him. “But he could.”

Nagisa stared at the ground. “I know he wouldn’t do that.”

“Well,” an ingenuine sad smile was on his face. “If it helps you sleep at night. I’ll see you, Nagisa kun.”

Catching sight of him about to turn, Daichi rushed up, launching himself at his legs. “Bye bye Gaga!”

Asano looked down at him. “Yeah, later.”

Sighing, he watched Daichi let go after a few seconds, coming right back to Nagisa’s side. Nagisa didn’t even really want to take him home yet. Before leaving, Nagisa had told Karma he was taking him out, which constituted their conversation for the day. He’d only shrugged, so Nagisa had to assume he wasn’t too bothered. By the looks of things he hadn’t been awake long, anyway.

It was mid-afternoon already and Nagisa wasn’t in a rush. If only it wasn’t winter. He thought about getting them some actual food or something, but it was madness today, absolutely everyone in the town seemed to be queueing up outside doors. Daichi didn’t question why there were so many people, but he did seem pretty enamoured with the bright lights that were draped in every other shop window.

So much so that he walked into an inflatable Santa thing, instantly rebounding off it. “Look where you’re going Daichi!”

“Ouch,” he said, after the fact.

Nagisa sighed. “That’s exactly how I feel about this time of year too.” And then looking in the shop window, Nagisa noticed something. “Do you know what day it is?”

Looking up at him, Daichi wore an adorable pout.

“It’s Christmas,” Nagisa supplied. “Which means it’s also your Papa’s birthday.”

Daichi’s lips parted, like this was life altering news. “Why?”

He crouched down a little. “He’s a year older today. Do you know how many years it is?”

Face contorting, he seemed to genuinely think about it, before proudly producing four fingers.

Nagisa smiled. “A little more than that. _Your_ birthday isn’t for a while yet. Usually, you buy people presents for their birthday. Do you want to go get one?”

“Okay!”

Honestly he didn’t think Daichi possibly understood every part of that conversation, but he looked excited at the prospect of shopping. Nagisa smiled politely at the worker as they entered, hoping Daichi didn’t end up knocking anything over. Thankfully the more valuable things were either high up or locked in cabinets.

He was literally a child in a candy shop… or, well, a toy and collectable shop. Just short of breaking out into a run, Daichi wandered around as fast as his little legs could carry him. He looked around, hands reaching thankfully for the less damageable items. Eventually he stopped, in front of a bin with a few assorted items. It took him a moment, but he pulled out a cheap plastic toy katana.

“This is what you want?” Nagisa looked at it. “Remember, it’s not for you.”

“This one! This one!”  

Well, it _was_ his choice. At least he wasn’t picking up a ten thousand yen Vocaloid figurine or something. Nagisa paid the worker, before handing it to Daichi to carry. It wasn’t really toddler sized, and looked ridiculous in his arms, but he seemed to be proud carrying it anyway. At least they weren’t too far a walk away from home.

Daichi was determined, though, to even carry it up the stairs. So, as usual, the stairs took a significant amount of time. He didn’t rush him, though, it wasn’t like there was a time limit. Eventually, Daichi, the katana, _and_ Nagisa made it up in one piece. Reaching into his pocket for the keys, Nagisa realised he was probably missing something.

“Okay Daichi,” he crouched to his level again, “all you have to do is give it to Papa, and say ‘happy birthday’.”

Daichi looked at him curiously. “Ha’ee birthday!”

Nagisa smiled. “Just like that.”

He didn’t waste any time, when the door was unlocked, running straight off to Karma. Nagisa hung back, not really wanting to be involved in the conversation. He took his shoes off slowly, locking the door behind him. From there, it was hesitant steps, though he couldn’t get through to his bedroom without showing himself.

“Ha’ee birthday Papa!” Daichi had leapt into his arms.

Karma at least looked happy. “Wow, is that for _me_? I’ll have to show you how to use one of these things~”

For a brief moment, he looked up at Nagisa, and it was all Nagisa could do to shoot him a shy smile. He didn’t wait to see Karma’s reaction, instead just going straight into his room. Nothing of the situation really mattered, Nagisa couldn’t sit in there and pretend that everything was okay. To simply act like nothing had happened between them would be sacrificing a part of himself.

But Nagisa had never felt so lonely. Perhaps that was why he’d asked Asano if he’d wanted to catch up. It was easy enough to keep his mind off it when there was school work… Though school was just as bad. Everyone still gave him a wide berth, as if he would turn around and kill them if they didn’t. The only people who still spoke to him were his friends, though even they seemed a little more wary of him now. But Nagisa wasn’t willing to tell them the truth.

He thought back to a time when all he’d wanted to be was like Karma. The first half of his first year of middle school was spent wondering after Karma, imagining a world where he could be all of that. Nagisa hadn’t done anything himself to earn this reputation, but he was still taking the fall for Karma’s actions. Was this what it was like, to be like him?

* * *

 

_“K-Karma kun!” Nagisa said, surprised to see his friend actually in class. “I was worried… You didn’t reply to my text.”_

_With a grit in his teeth, he didn’t even look up at him. “Didn’t see it.”_

_Had Nagisa done something wrong? The last time he saw Karma was the day after his thirteenth birthday, right at the start of the winter break. He tried to think back to it. Was Karma mad because he didn’t pay for their food? Nagisa had tried his best to insist that he at least pay his own half, but sometimes it was no use arguing with Karma, not when he had his mind made up._

_He cleared his throat. “W-well, it took a lot of asking, but my mum said you can come over and play video games with me again!”_

_Finally, Karma met Nagisa’s eyes, disinterest in them. “Sorry, I’m busy.”_

_“But I- I didn’t say when it was!” Nagisa defended._

_Karma clenched his fist. “Nagisa kun…”_

_“O-oh,” he immediately retreated, taking a step back. “Another time then.”_

_Like that, he returned to his own desk, legs shaking under every step. Had Karma finally gotten bored of him? Nagisa couldn’t blame him… he was so… nothing. He’d known getting into this that it couldn’t possibly going to last. Karma was brilliant, strong and smart and funny, and he just made Nagisa’s heart flip over in his chest… Nagisa was sure he’d turn out to be an alpha. For himself, there was no chance of that. He deserved to be friends with someone on his own level._

_Not good enough. Not good enough. **Not good enough**. _

* * *

That was right. Just because Nagisa was the other parent of his child, just because of how much they’d been through together, didn’t mean anything had changed since then, except Nagisa was an _omega_ now and even more supposed to be beneath Karma. His natural talent for assassination didn’t mean much, especially not anymore. Because he wasn’t an assassin.

His feelings were still a complex nightmare to him. Now that he wasn’t dating Rin anymore, there was nothing to stop everything he tried to long to supress from rushing right back in like a tsunami. Except this time, there wasn’t even the hint of hope. He hadn’t even actually confessed his feelings, yet Karma had pretty much rejected him. He looked down on the way Nagisa wanted him, even when he had an excuse for it, maybe even _hated_ him.

Nagisa had to be some kind of a masochist, because somehow it didn’t change how he felt. Some of the things Karma had said and done, not just during that fight, were _awful_. And even if they were in a real ‘relationship’, Nagisa knew that Karma wouldn’t mystically change the way he acted. Apparently, though, that didn’t matter because he still _wanted_ him, wanted to be loved and accepted and everything else that came with it and enough. It wasn’t going to happen but his soul ached for it anyway.

He wasn’t sure how long he stayed in his room, except at some point it became dark, and he heard the muffled sounds of Karma putting Daichi to bed, seemingly going into his own room afterwards. Nagisa’s mind was spinning. Regardless of all of his feelings, he knew it was wrong to keep stepping around each other like this. Maybe Asano really was right, he’d have to take things into his own hands for them to change.

A peace offering, perhaps. He tried to walk confidently out of his room and into the kitchen. As predicted, the apartment was seemingly empty otherwise. He opened their fridge, pulling out a carton of strawberry milk. It appeared that Karma had thrown himself into actually drinking the damn things, since the fridge wasn’t overrun. Then, he knocked on the door.

“It’s the last one,” Nagisa held up the carton, when Karma opened up.

He looked at him like he’d seen a ghost. “Do you want to come in?”

Tentatively, Nagisa stepped inside. Even when they were on good terms he rarely went into Karma’s room, it was very much his own space. Subsequently it was also the most decorated place in the apartment. Nagisa wasn’t really sure how to describe it, except moderately bohemian and mismatched. He sat down awkwardly on the bed, noticing the near comical amount of school books that spilled over the desk.

Karma took the carton from him, though instead of going straight to drink it, he put it on top of his dresser. Nagisa craned his neck, noticing another of the cartons already up there, but he didn’t have time to question it. Karma was back in front of him, blocking his view of anything else. He didn’t say anything, though, like he understood Nagisa hadn’t come just for milk.

“Uhm-“ Nagisa started, but then stopped before words came about. “Happy birthday?”

The edges began to crack. “What’s this, some kind of repeat present?” he mock sighed. “I thought you were the non lazy one, out of the two of us.”

Nagisa smiled. “I also got you a katana.”

“ _Our son_ got the katana,” he corrected, “or am I mistaken?”

He could play along though. “With _my_ money. He picked it out himself though.”

Karma smiled too. “I guess it’s kind of his job to rinse money out of us.”

Just like that the brief light faded, conversation hitting a dead end. They were avoiding the real issue between them, and they both knew it. But where to even _start_. Nagisa didn’t really want to fight again, in fact he hated the idea, but it still felt like there was a fight to be had. There was so much between them, Nagisa wasn’t sure how else they’d get it all out.

He didn’t get the chance to speak, because suddenly Karma was _on_ him. Nagisa wasn’t sure what he was even trying to do, or how to react. Instinctively, he scrambled back, away from the sudden mass headed towards him. Apparently that threw off whatever motion Karma had been going for, his entire weight toppling across Nagisa and forcing the both of them down against the mattress. It was extremely ungraceful and Nagisa banged his nose on Karma’s shoulder in the process.

“What are you doing?!” Nagisa squirmed. “Karma!”

Finally, he relented, moving off him to sit on his heels. Staring down at Nagisa in an odd kind of way.

Nagisa sat up, rubbing the back of his head. “I think-“

“I’m sorry,” Karma cut him off. “For not listening to you.”

There it was, the mystic Akabane Karma Apology. Even if Nagisa had been the one to reach out for it first, but that was just a small detail. He’d proven Asano wrong, at least. But Nagisa wasn’t wholly satisfied with just that, either. Wasn’t certain Karma really understood his point.

“You _don’t_ listen to me,” Nagisa bit his lip. “Even when it’s important-”

He shot Nagisa a look. “That’s what I’m doing right now isn’t it?”

“By cutting me off?” Nagisa said, though it wasn’t harsh.

Karma took a deep breath. “I said some things.”

“You did.”

“ _Now_ who’s cutting who off?” He didn’t sound too annoyed, though. “You’re not weak, or desperate, or whatever else I said. It doesn’t matter. I just…” His face tinted pink. “I’m those things, not you.”

Nagisa looked him in the eye. “You never used to take things out on me like that.”

“I wanted to,” he admitted. “When we first met I wanted to beat you to a bloody pulp.”

That made him feel uneasy. “W-why didn’t you? It’s not like you’ve ever had a problem with fighting before.”

Karma turned his head away, staring at the wall. “I was scared.”

“Of _me_?” Admitting something like that wasn’t like him, it didn’t even seem real. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

His face was still tinted when he looked at him again. “You don’t even _know_ the power you have. It ticks me off.”

“Karma-“

“Can we just leave it here?” Karma almost snapped. “I don’t want to talk about that anymore.”

Nagisa knew the best thing to do would be to push him for it, to get the whole truth. There was a lot, he could see all over his face, that Karma wasn’t telling him. But Nagisa didn’t want another fight. Even if he did push, Nagisa was afraid of what he might hear. In his own way, at least, Karma seemed remorseful. He’d be stupid not to accept it.

He lowered his head. “Okay.”

Most of the tension dropped from his shoulders. “I missed you.”

His heart skipped a beat. And then his body crumpled, because he’d missed Karma too, so much. Not just this past month, no, more like the whole _year_. Ever since he’d realised the true extent of his feelings, and that they’d never be returned, he’d put this _distance_ between them. He missed it, missed their friendship, missed how being close to him used to feel as breathing. But there was no changing it. A very Karma like sentiment filled his head, he was already stuck in hell, so he may as well enjoy a few fleeting moments where he could.

“What is it?” Karma tilted his head. “You have your ‘I want to ask a dumb question’ look.”  

Nagisa swallowed. “C-can I stay?”

He didn’t say anything for a second. “If you want?”

 _Permission_. Nagisa nodded, straightening his body out, and then slowly lowered himself. Karma’s pillows were surprisingly soft. When Karma just watched him, Nagisa turned over, self conscious. The mattress dipped beside him, shifting with Karma’s weight. For a moment, they lay there separate, before he felt a tentative touch to his arm. Starved of such intimacy, Nagisa leant into it, and then Karma didn’t hesitate to hold him properly, wrapping their bodies together like they used to. Except, back then, it had been out of necessity because of how small his bed was. Now there was no such excuse.

It didn’t matter, though. After such a long time, Nagisa finally exhaled, eyes fluttering shut.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm ~pretty sure~ most of you will like this one. I REALLY mean it that I have to study now, though :') 
> 
> As always, comments and feedback are much appreciated :3


	65. Morning Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's the last day of their second year of high school

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> helpme

Waking up beside Karma was peaceful. It varied, what position Nagisa opened his eyes in. Sometimes, it was exactly as they’d fallen asleep, others they’d drifted completely apart to opposite sides of the bed. That morning in particular, he must have rolled over in his sleep, since his head was pretty much buried in Karma’s chest. Karma’s arms were still wrapped around him, though, chin resting on top of Nagisa’s head. He couldn’t move anywhere, not like that. Even in sleep, Karma was a lot stronger than him.

An unfortunate consequence of being an early riser, and Karma being a deep sleeper. Though, he couldn’t say he cared that much about the situation. There were far worse places he could be. Already, Nagisa felt his breaths syncing up to Karma’s, heartrate slowing into a lull. He could have just stayed there forever, if there weren’t things to do.

Nagisa almost hated that he missed the warmth, when Karma’s death grip on him loosened. He wasn’t quite awake, but definitely stirring. Instead of just lying there limply, Nagisa used the opportunity to get on with his actual duties. He extracted himself gently, tiptoeing out of the room. After a quick but necessary trip to the bathroom, he carefully craned his neck into Daichi’s bedroom.

What he saw, like most days as of recent, was an already awake Daichi, trying to escape his crib. Nagisa had told him _countless_ times not to do that, but yet there they were. It was almost like he was doing it on purpose, to make some kind of a point.

“Mornin Dada!” He called out proudly.

Nagisa sighed. “Morning to you too, Daichi.”

As always, Daichi tried to squirm and wiggle away from him whilst he was being changed. It wasn’t as though this was a new part of his personality, but since his second birthday less than a month ago, it had certainly become worse. It didn’t help that he was completely spoilt, either. Despite attempts to keep it at least a little under control, there still seemed to be toys everywhere. But that was his and Karma’s _own_ fault.

He giggled, when Nagisa finally let him go, jumping up and down on the spot. “Wanna see Papa!”

That sounded like a _great_ idea. If Daichi wanted, he could totally be Karma’s problem for the rest of the morning. Not that Nagisa saw him as a _problem_ , of course. His energy levels were tiring, for sure, but Nagisa almost saw it as endearing. He was definitely more inquisitive than generally mischievous, and Nagisa had a hard time ever telling him no.

He followed after him like a baby duck, even though they were only going into Karma’s room. Though Daichi could easily climb onto most furniture these days, Karma’s bed was just a tiny bit too high for him, so Nagisa had to lift him up. He crawled across the bed curiously, going right over to where Karma was lying. Cautiously, he poked him on the cheek.

Karma’s hand came up, instinctually swatting him away. It wasn’t hard, though, not much more than a bat. Daichi didn’t seem to mind, which was fair enough because he had technically attacked first. Nagisa joined them, sitting cross legged on top of the mattress. He saw Karma crack an eye open.

“Wow, Nagisa, you shrunk overnight.”

Daichi laughed again. “Nooo Papa.”

He smiled. “How did _you_ get in here, huh?”

“Ran.”

Nagisa suddenly felt his brief spout of energy fade, since nobody was in a rush clearly. After a second or two of debate, he lay back down, almost ready to go straight back to sleep. This arrangement between he and Karma, they hadn’t really talked about it. They hadn’t seriously talked about anything since they made up, and that was a couple of months ago. Even if their friendship was rekindled, he knew it was _weird_. But, he slept better like that.

“Want pancake,” Daichi announced.

“ _Huh~_? Pancakes? That’s not a proper breakfast.”

Daichi rolled down in between them. “Don’t care!”

He looked over at the clock. “Hmm, not sure we have time. Maybe we can have them later.”

Eyes widening, Daichi looked desperately at Nagisa. “Dada? Dada do it!”

Nagisa smiled. “I can’t just change the time Daichi.”

“ _Why_.”

“You have to go to nursery,” he explained, “but it’s the last day. You won’t have to go back for a couple of weeks after that.”

Whatever face he pulled wasn’t happy. “Me no wanna.”

Karma poked him in the cheek, revenge for earlier. “ _I_ don’t want to go to school either, but sometimes, I got’ta.” On hearing that, Daichi started scooting himself away from them. “Where are _you_ going?”

“Going!” He announced, managing to half abseil his way down from the bed, making a point of his exit.

Nagisa had heard a lot of things about two year olds, enough that he held his breath for most of Daichi’s birthday. So far, nothing too crazy had happened, aside from the almost frightening rate at which he was picking up words (he clearly remembered the days when Daichi couldn’t speak at _all_ ). No real temper tantrums, if anything Nagisa thought he was just starting to pick up _sass_. He was growing up too fast.

“I think he needs a proper bed,” Nagisa said, whilst he thought about it. “He’s going to just climb out of that crib one day.”

Karma bit his lip. “I’m pretty sure he’d managed it already.”

“A-and you didn’t tell me that?!”

He sighed, rolling over to stare at the ceiling. “He’d be sleeping like that until the day he turns twenty, if I had it my way.”

Nagisa mimicked his motion. “He’ll be starting _school_ in only a couple of years.”

“We’ll go at the weekend or something,” Karma promised. “Maybe we can get him one of those crazy ones with a slide.” 

He was confused, when Karma moved to get up. “You’re not actually making him pancakes, are you?”

Karma shrugged. “I wouldn’t have said no. It’s bills day.”

 _Bills_ _day_. Nagisa hated bills day. It wasn’t like they couldn’t afford it or anything, but _nobody_ liked chunks of money being taken. Truthfully, Nagisa was _okay_ at maths, but it was different when the numbers really applied and seemed to swim off the page at him. He would have been more than happy to let Karma just sort it out, but Karma kept insisting he check it _too_. And Karma always seemed to know when Nagisa only skimmed it.

He took the opportunity, when Karma left the room, to pull on his school uniform. A part of him wished he could do what Daichi wanted and just stay at home, but that was hardly responsible behaviour. People seemed to have mostly moved on from all the drama surrounding him, but that didn’t mean he particularly wanted to sit through the graduation ceremony, where there would be speeches. Because apparently his taste _had_ to include valedictorians.

Karma was holding something that definitely didn’t look like a bill, when Nagisa left the bedroom. “Woah, she finally managed it.”

“Huh? Managed what?”

A devilish look came across his expression. “Maybe I won’t tell you.”

Nagisa caught a glimpse of it. “Hey! That’s addressed to me too!”

“You’ll have to come get it,” he darted left, holding the paper high above his head.

He knew Karma was just teasing him, but Nagisa didn’t want to give it up. The mystery struck him as interesting, and now he was invested. He jumped, trying to tackle it out of Karma’s grasp. The motion managed to unbalance him, but he was too tall for Nagisa to actually reach. It caused them to topple onto the sofa.

Karma didn’t give up, thwarting Nagisa’s attempts to wrestle it from his hand. They were completely play fighting at that point, making light kicks and bats at each other. It was unclear who had the edge, until Karma somehow managed to manoeuvre it so he had hold of both Nagisa’s hands. Using the brief advantage, he pinned them hopelessly.

It took his brain a second to catch up, for the endorphins to shrink away and for everything to go cold. Like a strange dream behind his eyelids, Nagisa remembered hands pinning him down, and feeling completely helpless. It made his chest tighten, and his stomach burn with nausea. He couldn’t be here like this.

“Karma, stop,” he said seriously.

Immediately obeying, Karma released him, sitting up to move completely off him. “You’re okay.”

Nagisa nodded, his breathing returning to normal. “I’m sorry,” he said quietly, almost a whisper.

“Here,” he bumped Nagisa’s shoulder, and handed him the piece of card. “Crazy, huh?”

__

Nagisa’s eyes widened. “No way.”

Relaxing again, Karma looked up. “I want to know what Bitch Sensei did to pull _that_ off.”

 “Maybe he just asked her?”

“Karasuma Sensei?” Karma raised an eyebrow.

Nagisa examined it another time. “This is almost a year from now.”

“Heh, probably so nobody makes plans. Don’t think she’d take too kindly to people skipping the wedding.”

He put the card down on the table. “Don’t try it.”

“I wouldn’t _dare_ ,” he replied, voice full of sarcasm. “Where did Daichan go, anyway?”

Nagisa pulled himself to his feet. “I should probably get him dressed.”

It was weird, the thought of his two old teachers getting married. Like everyone else’s lives really were moving on. Appropriate, since it was the last day of the school year. They were coming to the time where things like university was more than just an abstract concept in the back of his head. As much as Nagisa knew what his goal was, and was confident in it, everything still seemed a little daunting.

“Don’t wanna,” Daichi said, immediately after seeing Nagisa standing at the door.

Nagisa sat down on the floor. “It’s only for a few hours.”

He crossed his arms. “Stay with Dada!”

“I have to go to school too. Don’t you want to play with all the toys at nursery?”

Daichi didn’t say anything, but stared down at the floor.

Opening one of the draws, Nagisa pulled out a very colourful item. “You can wear your favourite shirt. _And_ , when I come get you later, we can read a book.”

“Me put on,” he demanded.  

Nagisa decided to just let him do it, only having to assist a little bit when his head got stuck. The jeans were a slightly different story, but at least he managed to get them mostly on. Eventually presentable enough, all Nagisa had to do was straighten out his hair a little, since it had a habit of sticking out in wild directions. _Cute_. He probably needed a hair cut, though, otherwise soon it would be covering his eyes.

Daichi knew automatically when he was free to leave, squirming away from Nagisa’s hand to run off and out of the room. Karma was changed himself by then, already in the kitchen. Unfortunately for Nagisa, since he’d spent a little too long in bed, he didn’t have time to eat anything properly. It would be bad to have _nothing_ , though, so he grabbed a piece of fruit.

“See you later,” he said to Daichi, not even willing to attempt giving him a kiss goodbye.

Daichi looked up at him. “Bye bye!”

“Have fun,” Karma said, over his shoulders.

Nagisa knew he wasn’t about to have much fun at all. But he forced himself to leave, anyway, taking the ever familiar walk to the train station. At least there would be a couple of weeks without any long journeys. It wasn’t like either of them had any plans for the break, aside from what had turned into the annual classroom cleaning memorial for Korosensei. As far as Nagisa understood it, all Karma wanted to do was study. Aleady.

Thankfully, once he reached school, nobody payed him much attention, and he was able to slip into his seat without being stopped or stared at or anything. Class hadn’t started yet, but everyone else was already there. Usually, Nagisa was one of the first.

“You’re a little late, Nagisa kun,” Kita observed.

Nagisa slumped. “Karma was being… Karma.”

She looked at him inquisitively. “Who?”

“His hot ba- _roommate_ ,” Higashi answered, for him.

“Oh yeah,” she looked at Higashi directly. “You met him, didn’t you? Is he really that good looking?”

Nishi leant forward in his chair. “Hey!”

Higashi shrugged. “I mean, I at least think s-“

“Stop it,” Nagisa said, his stomach twisting over with rage. He couldn’t deal with the way she kept talking about him. But this time he didn’t have the excuse of ‘you already have a boyfriend’ to keep his thoughts at bay. He knew he wasn’t actually going to do it, but he felt the urge to kill. And to do it right then and there.

“I’m s-sorry?” Higashi sounded scared.

Nishi looked at him funny. “Hey man cut it out.”

Nagisa remembered, then, where he was. “I-I didn’t mean to-“ 

“Uh,” he moved away though, “you’re just really not helping the things people say about you.”

He slumped. “You believe them.”

Kita nudged her boyfriend. “We _don’t_.”

Nishi didn’t look so sure, though. “It’s just… a bit of a coincidence that you break up for reasons you won’t tell us, and then he shows up looking like that?”

Clearing her throat, Higashi looked at Nagisa. “It’s okay.”

Their teacher arrived, before anything more could be said on that topic. Nagisa wanted to sink into his chair and just collapse. Better yet, cease to exist. Only briefly, though, he still had things he needed to do. Like decide when to go to Ikea. It was more comforting to think of that, then anything else surrounding his head. He did try to pay attention to their last lessons, though.

The actual day of teaching ended early, due to the graduation. Even though he was surrounded by people, Nagisa couldn’t help but feel very much alone, when it came to lunch time. He didn’t really feel much like eating, though, only really chewing lightly to fit in. When everyone started to pack away and get ready for the ceremony, Nagisa almost flinched.

“You okay, Nagisa kun?” Minami’s hand came down on his back.

“Y-yeah,” Nagisa lied.

He didn’t want to sit through a long graduation ceremony. He didn’t want to pretend to be happy yet wistful about everything leaving. And certainly, he didn’t want to listen to Rin give a speech about how _great_ his time at this school was. At least the one good thing was he and his friends were leaving, so Nagisa wouldn’t have to spend half his time strategically avoiding him in the hallways.

Higashi smiled. “Do you want to skip it?”

Nagisa had only skipped class once before, for something that didn’t include sickness. And that was _years_ ago. He remembered Karma begging him to try it out, that they’d have loads of fun and he should try not being so straight laced. It had been fun, thrilling briefly, but Nagisa had hated the feeling of doing something wrong, the fear that he might get into trouble. Back then of course, his mother would have declared Karma a terrible influence and outright banned them from hanging out.

Still, Nagisa nodded, realising that slight punishment was probably better. He didn’t know where they were going to go, though, or what they’d do. Nagisa was surprised she was even offering, considering how he’d spoken to her earlier. He wasn’t exactly being the best friend. They dawdled behind the rest of the class, until Higashi sidestepped. Nagisa followed after her, until she poked her head into an empty classroom.

“Graduation ceremonies are boring for me,” she explained, without being prompted.

Nagisa swallowed. “I-I’m sorry for acting like that.”

She waved him off. “Don’t worry about it, I clearly touched a nerve.”

“It shouldn’t have though,” he looked down, “it’s not like we’re together.”

Higashi swallowed. “That doesn’t mean you’re not allowed to have feelings about it.”

“That should go for you too,” Nagisa pointed out.

She shrugged. “I’m starting to think he’s not really my type you know, can’t really see myself being a step mum. No offence.”

“N-none taken.”

Higashi tilted her head, then. “Hey, is that why you really broke up?”

He hadn’t actually spoken to any of his friends about it, other than brief confirmation that his relationship with Rin was over. The only person who kind of knew the truth was Karma, and, well, that hadn’t turned out particularly great. Relatively, he told himself it wasn’t that bad, but he didn’t want to drag it all back up to the surface again.

“Kind of,” he said, because it had been the origin of their initial fight.

She stood very straight. “You know you don’t have to, but I don’t mind if you want to talk to me about it. I mean, when you _like_ someone, it’s hard to have a serious conversation. And I don’t think you _have_ many of those, right?”

He wasn’t sure what to say to that. It wasn’t that Nagisa didn’t trust her, or didn’t appreciate the offer, but Nagisa didn’t _like_ speaking about his problems. Unloading all of that to someone else, it was against everything he’d been programmed to do. Still, maybe he could think about it, even if right now his toes curled at the thought.

“Thank you,” Nagisa said seriously.

They spent the duration of the ceremony just hanging out, which was a nice change from all the drama in his life. It felt good, to just talk about normal things. He tried to stop her, but she ended up sketching on the little blackboard, just small doodles here and there. Nagisa hadn’t noticed before, but she was actually pretty good at art. Much better than him, anyway.

The sounds of commotion came from outside the classroom, showing the ceremony was over. They said their goodbyes with a friendly nod, with promises to maybe see if they could meet up over the break. After that, it was separate ways, getting lost in the sea of excited people who were happy the school year was finally over.

Nagisa was pretty happy that he’d managed to avoid his ex boyfriend, but as luck would have it, he almost ran right _into_ him. He dodged in time, thankfully, but not without bringing attention to himself. For less than a second, Rin’s eyes met his, before he jerked away like the _sight_ of Nagisa was a poison. Not that Nagisa had a lot to say to him either. He stiffened, and then forced himself to exhale, before he kept walking. He wondered if that would be the last time they ever saw each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Higashi was totally about to say 'baby daddy' before she cut herself off.
> 
> 私は、今日しけんがありますから、日本語だけ書きます。どうして? しんぱいしてる... とてもバカです。勉強しなければなりませんが、書きました。草。日本語がことできません。ぜひみんなさんはあそびました。私においのりしてください。 
> 
> (Hilariously most of that is likely incorrect. わかりませんか? Ggr ;))


	66. Gun Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Karma takes Daichi shopping

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It has been too long without Karma POV

“Do you like sukiyaki?” Karma looked down at Daichi quizzically. “I don’t remember.”

He didn’t seem to care much about his question, instead making what Karma assumed to be some sort of machine like noise. He was just wandering around, arms stuck out wide. If Karma had had a choice, he definitely wouldn’t have taken Daichi out on an errand like this. There was no human measure for how much he loved his son, honestly, but stuff like this took twice as long as it otherwise needed to.

Deciding that Daichi was going to _have_ to like it, he grabbed beef from the fridge, putting it in the shopping trolley that Daichi had refused to sit in like a good obedient toddler. If such things even existed. Karma worried nowadays, though, when Daichi was quiet for too long. The only annoying thing about sukiyaki was it was a lot of food to make, though he was going to insist Nagisa eat a lot of it later, for strength.

Conveniently for him, his heat had hit during the weekend, meaning he didn’t have to miss any school. It was not the best for Karma. He knew their… night time arrangement was a little weird, but it was apparently making him co-dependent or something, because he’d _missed_ Nagisa last night. He’d returned to his own room, which was a good and necessary thing since Karma didn’t have scent blockers in _his_ room, and as much as he’d almost got _used_ to that kind of scent, he didn’t need to have it covering all his possessions.

It meant Karma had Daichi to himself for the time being. But sitting around in their apartment all day would have bummed him out. It was almost like torture. So, he took Daichi shopping. He was pretty sure Daichi didn’t mind, by the looks of him. He was still skipping along happily in front of him, in a whole world of his own.

“Papa!” Daichi stopped, pointing to something on the shelf. “This!”

Whatever it was, Karma knew he didn’t need it. He also couldn’t really be bothered to bend down and pick it up. “Not on the list, Daichan.”

He pouted, and then stuck his tongue out.

Naturally, Karma returned the gesture.

He ran off again, and Karma just let him do his own thing. It wasn’t exactly a big shop. Actually, Karma would actually be a little impressed if Daichi managed to get himself lost. Not that he thought Daichi would care the same level other kids his age in that position would. One time – which Nagisa did not need to know about – he managed to hide in a bush for a full _hour_ , not a care in the world.

“Papa! Papa!” He ran up to him, and started tugging on his trouser leg. “Me want!”

Karma looked at him sceptically. “Want _what_?”

He started frantically pointing. “This this this!”

Despite it being a small shop, apparently they still had room for toys. Following his pointing direction, Karma realised he wanted a kids’ bb gun. Immediately, it didn’t look the right size at all. Honestly, Karma wouldn’t have had an issue with getting it, but there were things to consider. For one, it had only _just_ been his birthday, and he seemed to own endless toys. Nagisa worried about spoiling him too much, and probably wouldn’t be happy if Karma bought him a legitimate weapon.

“You don’t _need_ it,” Karma cringed as he spoke.

“ _Want_ it,” he pronounced, like Karma hadn’t heard him before.

He looked down at him sadly. “Sorry, Daichan, you can’t.”

His eyes welled up. “ _Papa_ …”

Karma couldn’t stand it when he cried. Even when he was just a baby, and crying was all he did, he never really got over the way his hear used to sink. Thankfully, once Daichi had picked up some words, tears became a very rare occurrence, only when he didn’t know another rational way to express himself. The last month or so, though, things seemed a little different.

“Come on,” he tried, “I have everything we need already.”

Daichi turned towards the BB gun. “No! Me. Want. This.”

He didn’t know what to do in this particular situation. “We’re going.”

What he hadn’t expected was for Daichi to start _shrieking_. You’d have thought Karma was torturing him or something. In fact, people turned to look at him like he was doing just _that_. Karma had half the mind to throw a fist through their judgey expressions, but he didn’t want Daichi to start crying even more. It didn’t matter, though, because he apparently decided to just face plant the floor.

In any other situation, he would have found it at least a little funny. His son was such a _drama_ _queen_. But, by the looks of things, he wasn’t planning on moving any time soon. And Karma couldn’t just _leave_ him there. There weren’t that many options. Ignoring the dirty look an elderly woman gave him, Karma just bent down and scooped Daichi over his shoulder.

Of course, he wasn’t particularly happy about that. He continued to sob, desperately trying to squirm and whack Karma’s shoulder with his tiny fists, presumably so he’d be dropped. Granted, Daichi was a lot stronger than he actually looked, but not so much that his punches were any more than a minor inconvenience.

“That,” Daichi finally said, out of nowhere, barely audible through his whimpering.

He was looking at _sweets_ , now. “Will you stop freaking out if I get you candy?”

Daichi was silent, still huffing, but the worst of it seemed to have died down. Maybe _bribing_ him wasn’t the best thing to do, but Karma hated seeing him upset, and he was starting to get a headache. There was only so much he could take… He picked it up, ready to get out of the shop as quickly as humanly possible, flashing an only semi apologetic smile at the cashier.

He’d calmed down by the time they were outside, by the looks of things. “Down.”

“There you go,” Karma said, handing him the sweets.

Daichi looked at them sadly. He took a handful, and clearly decided to take an _age_ chewing on it, like he was going to cry all over again. He wasn’t just going to forget it, then.

“Listen,” Karma tried, crouching down, “you have a lot of toys already, don’t you? Besides, something like that’s too big for your right now.”

He blinked. “ _Am_ big.”

“Yeah,” he sighed, “but you still can’t hold a gun the size of your own body.”

“ _No_ ,” Daichi said louder, batting his hand like he was going to try and punch him.

Karma dodged easily, though. “I promise you, that’s just not how it works! If you _really_ want a gun, then maybe you can get one that you can actually hold. But not right now, yeah?”

His bottom lip started trembling. “ _Now_ want.”

“But we have to go _home_ ,” he explained. “Otherwise you won’t get to eat, or play with the rest of your toys… Maybe I’ll have to take your books away too.”

Fear struck his eyes. “No! No! No, nonononono.”

Karma wouldn’t _actually_ punish him like that. Or at all. “Then come home with me, and we can read them. Does that sound good?”

“O-okay,” Daichi slowly put another sweet in his mouth.

He’d take it. As they started to walk back, he seemed to forget about being upset, eventually morphing back into his usual self. Karma didn’t know what _that_ had been. On the rare occasions he said no to anything, Daichi just accepted it. Had he been possessed or something? Or maybe it was the universe catching up to him, considering how well tempered Daichi had generally been for the first two years of his life.

By the time they got to the apartment, it was clear Nagisa wasn’t over his heat quite yet, since things were exactly as they’d been left. That was fine, it wasn’t like Karma _minded_ having Daichi to himself. He was fine by that point, calm enough to ‘help’ by passing him items of shopping. Maybe it was just a blip. Everyone had bad days.

“Come on then,” he said eventually, “which book do you want?”

Finally, Daichi’s face brightened up, and he scampered off to his room. Naturally, he came back with five, though they were all pretty short from memory. Maybe a little too short. But Karma didn’t really know, it was more Nagisa’s thing to sit and read with him. It wasn’t that Karma didn’t care of have the time, but Nagisa was just the person he defaulted to, and the one who was convinced that he could actually read it, half the time.

“G-gu-ri,” Daichi pointed to the page.

Karma didn’t really understand little kid books. Maybe because his parents had never really read that kind of thing to him, when he was young. Whatever this was, it was _weird_. Something about mice and eggs and decisions. Daichi seemed to like turning the pages, at least. Maybe he really was reading it, since he’d pronounced one of the character’s names, but it was also very possible he’d heard it enough anyway.

As he actually read it for him, Daichi’s eyes were glued to the page. But regardless, Karma wasn’t totally invested in whatever the story was, barely comprehending the words he spoke. The good thing about kiddy books, though, was they didn’t last that long. He was almost relieved about that, until he remembered Daichi had also bought out another four.

“Hey, Daichan,” he said, pulling out some pocket change. “Do you want to see something cool?”

He blinked up at him. “Cool?”

“Paying attention?” Karma moved to sit cross legged in front of Daichi, who was clearly focusing intently on the hundred yen coin he was pinching. Using a simple sleight of hand move, he acted out taking the coin with his other hand, creating the illusion of it ‘disappearing’. It was a pretty basic trick, but as someone who had never seen it before, Daichi’s jaw adorably dropped to the floor.

Laughing lightly at his expression, Karma exposed the coin again. “See?”

 Daichi squinted at the coin, like it was made of fairy dust or something. “Again.”

 “Okay,” Karma said, exposing the coin again. “Watch it closer this time.” The trick he pulled was pretty similar, though  to shake things up a bit he leaned forward, mimicking pulling the coin out of Daichi’s ear this time. He still looked like he’d seen a ghost or something, his young mind not quite able to process basic ‘magic’ tricks.

Still, whilst Karma was laughing at his confusion, he reached out, grabbing the coin from his grasp. “Mine.”

“Huh? How does _that_ work?”

“Ear mine,” he demonstrated, and then pointed to the coin. “Mine.”

Tilting his head for a second, Karma shrugged. “Fair enough. You keep it.”

It wasn’t like he was that fussed about a hundred yen. Or like Daichi could realistically buy something with it. There was still a funny look all over his face, like he was genuinely trying to figure out how that had happened. Maybe Karma would teach him how to do it, when he was a little older. There were many things on that list. Namely things like poker, since the game had gone over Nagisa’s head the _seven_ times Karma had tried teaching him.

He pulled a face. “Papa… Need change.”

It took Karma a minute to catch up, but it was clear what he meant from the way he was tugging at his trousers expectantly. No, he took all his regrets about Daichi growing up so fast back. He could grow up _right_ now, if it meant Karma didn’t have to do this anymore. And perhaps two years of changing nappies was _enough_. If he had it in him to recognise when he needed a change, then it would be okay.

“You know what…” he looked around slowly, “follow me.”

“Why?” Daichi asked, but trotted after him anyway.

He swung the door to their toilet open. “You see this? This is where you’re gonna go now before you need changing.”

Daichi tilted his head. “Okay.”

‘Okay’? That felt a little too easy, but he didn’t feel like complaining about it. Hopefully, he really did understand that concept. But that was perhaps pushing it a bit. It didn’t matter, though, because he still had to change him right _then_. The worst part of the day, honestly. After that, it seemed like Daichi had had enough interaction for a while, pointedly going off to flick through his books on his own.

Halfway through cooking dinner, Nagisa finally emerged from his room, looking bleary and kind of like he’d just been in a car accident. Karma couldn’t help but wrinkle his nose, as the scent of past heat briefly hit him, before the door was shut. Even if he’d become just a fraction more neutral to it, he still quickly threw some spices in the pot, letting _that_ fill his nostrils instead.

“Are you going to want to eat?” Karma asked.

Nagisa almost jolted. “I don’t know,” his voice was dry and croaky, “I’ll see how I feel after a bath.”

Sticking his head up at the sound of his voice, Daichi looked elated, rushing to embrace his leg. “Dada!”

He paused, but didn’t seem too upset at Daichi stopping his path. “Did you have a fun day?”

Daichi nodded. “Get a _gun_.”

Of _course_ that’s what he’d remember. “Karma?”

“I said he _might_ get one,” Karma tried to explain casually, “if he shut up about getting the one in the shop.”

His eyes narrowed. “Why were you even _near_ a gun today?”

“Why are _you_ even still standing here?” He disregarded. “You smell gross.”

He didn’t, really. Karma had noticed that his scent fluctuated quite a bit, but that wasn’t saying much since it was hard to put a finger on exactly what it was ordinarily. Right then, Karma would have compared it to some kind of fruit tea. Far less annoying than some of the girls at school, who smelt like straight up sugar and chocolate but not in a particularly good way.

Nagisa pulled a face, but was obviously not genuinely upset. He just disappeared into the bathroom, turning on his heel. By the looks of things, he probably would be eating. If he still felt ill, most of the time he’d just straight up refuse, or look like he was going to hurl at the thought. So, Karma put a bowl out for him.

As though he’d timed it, Nagisa emerged, clean and good as new, right when he was finished with the cooking. Of course, Daichi wasted _no_ time in starting his food, when Karma poured some out for him, but Nagisa seemed to be gingerly toying with his chopsticks. Maybe it wasn’t necessarily his place, but he was irritated, and he didn’t care. He took Nagisa’s bowl himself, filling it with as much food as possible.

“What are you doing?” He asked, like he was a little lost.

Karma slid the bowl back over. “You need to get your energy back up.”

He looked at him funny. “You keep trying to feed me too much. This isn’t the first time, either.”

That was a false statement, truly. “That’s a lie,” he said jokingly.

“Yeah, sure it is,” Nagisa looked at him, “ _alpha_.”

Karma choked on the air. He couldn’t deny that he hadn’t expected _that_. All reasonable words left him. The only time Nagisa had ever called him something like that was actually during his heats. At least that was excusable, because Nagisa was so out of it that he probably didn’t even remember Karma’s name at the time. So it caught him off guard, to say the least.

Nagisa’s face fell. “Karma? Are you okay? I was only joking!”

He forced himself to calm down, ignoring the way Daichi was giggling, examining them both. It was a good thing he was too young and innocent to understand the various complexities that came with secondary genders. It didn’t particularly feel like an urge that originated from him being an alpha, wanting to provide for every helpless omega in sight. No, he thought, surely not. He just knew Nagisa would fall asleep without eating, and would annoy him by searching through the kitchen in the middle of the night.

“You’ve spent too much time around me recently,” Karma said.

He looked down at his food, a smile returning to his lips. “ _Maybe_.”

“We need to work on your delivery though,” he explained. “And it doesn’t really work if you immediately take it back.”

“So, even more time together?”

Karma sighed. “Eat up.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yo. 
> 
> So, I did my Japanese exams. They went okay, like I know for a fact I did well enough to pass, but HOW WELL I passed is... debatable. I said I only listen to anime music in one of them it was a whole dead ass thing. But anyway, that's done now. I have two history exams next week, which I know NOTHING about, but I'm going to start studying for them now :D 
> 
> I have no idea how good the latter half of this chapter is because I'm honestly pretty hung over from karaoke last night. Also, it snowed, I was wearing a crop top for some reason, and now I have a cold. Anyway! I hope you like this one :3 
> 
> (lmao remember when I said I was going to take a break from this fic and just didn't take a break)


	67. Expelled Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Old grudges are brought back to life

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tres Drama

Nagisa was extraordinarily tired and he regretted everything. Last night, he’d agreed to watch over Daichi until he needed to go to bed. He’d still had homework to do, and Karma looked pretty beat for reasons unknown to him. Whatever the case, Karma had been asleep, and Nagisa had dealt with putting Daichi to bed himself. Daichi didn’t really like sleeping anymore. And when Daichi didn’t want to do something, hell hath no fury.

Anyway, by the time he was in his bed and _stayed_ there, Nagisa was close to passing out. To make matters worse, Karma had been cuddling the sheets in his place, which meant sleeping in the cold. He honestly spent most of the night annoyed about that, before eventually drifting off. Of course, somehow, he still woke up being held by Karma, although it seemed Karma was actually already awake.

“Nagisa,” he said softly, “Nagisa you have to get up.”

He couldn’t help but nuzzle his head closer, like he was trying to bury himself in his skin. “Just a little longer.”

“Nagisa…”

“Mmm?”

Nagisa tilted his head up, to try and catch a little of Karma’s expression. He could see that he was flushed, could feel his heart beating rapidly under his ear. Still half asleep, he wondered how easy would it be to just _take_? If Nagisa were someone else, someone who was good at this kind of thing, he’d just lean up and kiss him stupid. But, Nagisa knew he could never pluck up the courage for something so bold.

Karma bit down on his lip. “It’s pretty late…”

“I’m comfortable,” Nagisa complained, rolling over so that his body was almost completely on top of Karma’s, his thigh awkwardly between Nagisa’s. It wasn’t the _most_ comfortable anymore like that, but he felt like a heating pad.

“Ah-huh,” he said, like he was on edge. “Seriously Nagisa what’ve you been eating lately? I can’t breathe.”

A taste of his own medicine, then. It wasn’t like Karma had never lay his entire body completely on top of him, smothering him entirely. In fact, he did that quite often, presumably just to laugh at the way Nagisa squirmed and struggled. Still, he complied a little, giving Karma’s chest a little more room. But he still wanted to go right back to sleep.

Apparently that had given Karma ideas, because his hand came down to his hair. Ordinarily, Nagisa would have flinched away, but he didn’t want to lose his pillow, somehow. He just let him do it, threading his fingers through his long and probably unruly hair. Usually, if anyone, it was Daichi who tugged at it. Speaking of…

“Dada~ Papa~”

Nagisa stuck his head up, locking eyes with an equally sleepy looking Daichi, who’d apparently got himself up. He’d been doing that, since not being confined to a crib with bars on it. Perhaps it wasn’t a good idea, to let him just wander around as he liked with no supervision, but so far at least it hadn’t been much of a real issue.

Daichi leant against the door frame. “Hungry.”

Instantly, Nagisa was out of bed, ignoring the way Karma lightly sniggered at him. There was no way Nagisa was dealing with it when he was truly hungry. Hungry Daichi was Angry Daichi, and no, he had to avoid that at all possible costs. If Nagisa had actually slept in a little, it was fair enough for him to want breakfast anyway.

Thankfully, he did manage to curveball _that_ , and his day got off to a pretty smooth start. As smooth as could go, nowadays. Nagisa had thought that going to a university affiliate high school would be different, but everyone still seemed highly bogged down in third year stress. Of course, Nagisa was still concerned about doing well, he had to _pass_ , but half his classmates had turned into zombies. And it wasn’t even summer yet.

Instead of the usual laughter and chatting that filled the classroom, most people were studying, like their fears were channelled right into their textbooks. The only time he’d seen anything like it, it had been the final exams of middle school, where Class 1A had gone completely crazy. Perhaps Nagisa _should_ be studying more, even Karma hadn’t been spared from this insanity. But, it wasn’t like he didn’t put work in, actually Nagisa felt pretty secure in his position right then.

Higashi slammed her head down into the English text book. “I don’t get it.”

Peering over, Nagisa tried to figure out what she was looking at. “Are you okay, Higashi san?”

“No,” she groaned, “never okay. These words don’t make _sense_.”

“You have the two halves of the sentence the wrong way,” Nagisa pointed out gently, “maybe you should try and remember to flip it around in your head, so it’s more like Japanese.”  

She looked down at the paper. “Oh, yeah, that’s a little better. Ugh, we can’t _all_ be fluent.”

Nagisa knew she was joking, but he still felt self conscious. “I-I’m not really.”

Turning around, Kita shot him a weird look. “You _are_ pretty good at English, though.”

He couldn’t actually use a large chunk of the English he knew. It was easier, in a language that isn’t his own, to detach himself from the things he said. However, the lessons Bitch Sensei had given him would probably give his current teacher a small heart attack, no matter how ‘confident’ he was in actually saying them. But he wasn’t _fluent_.

Their teacher came in, then. So far, now that they’d adjusted to being in their third year, their teacher was a little stricter than most. Thankfully, Nagisa was pretty adjustable. He stood instantly like everyone else, ready for some tough lessons. Just because Nagisa wasn’t in a permanent state of stress didn’t mean it was _easy_.

A woman he only vaguely recognised knocked harshly on the door. “I need to take Shiota Nagisa please.”

Everybody turned to look at him, and Nagisa felt his heart drop to his stomach. Clearly, something was wrong, but it could be _anything_. She seemed urgent, too. He tried his best to stop his mind from racing to horrific conclusions, standing to excuse himself without being too disruptive. Ignoring the curious looks that followed him on the way out.

The woman, probably some kind of office assistant, didn’t waste any time. Nagisa almost struggled to keep up with her, she was walking with such urgency. There was no attempt at casual conversation, though, not even to fill the awkward air around them. This was definitely serious, then. It was only halfway through the walk that Nagisa realised where he was going.

She stopped outside the headmaster’s office, looking at him expectantly. At least nobody was in _trouble_ , causing him to be called for, that would probably be at reception. So either Nagisa had done something exceptional (he hadn’t, from recent memory), or he was in some serious trouble. The last time Nagisa had something like this, he found out he was going to be in E Class.

He was practically pushed into the room, where not only the headmaster sat, but two other important looking men. “Ah, Shiota san, please take a seat.”

Automatically, Nagisa’s legs started to shake, but he did as he was told.

“We’ve called you here to discuss… perhaps an unpleasant issue,” the headmaster said awkwardly. “But it has recently been brought to our attention, and we’d like to deal with this as quickly and quietly as possible.”

Nagisa gulped, mind racing a mile a minute. “W-what for?”

He grimaced. “We’re aware of your… living situation. As you should know, it goes against our policy to condone students of different genders living alone together. That also applies to secondary genders. Perhaps that could have been rectified, but the child… complicates things.”

It was like he forgot how to breathe. After so many years of nobody even _mentioning_ it, Nagisa had forgotten that being a parent even had the potential to get him into trouble at school. He’d hidden it pretty well whilst he still had the baby weight, but even after that, he just hadn’t brought anything about his outside life up. The only person who knew was _Higashi_ , and she wouldn’t try and get him reported. ‘Revenge’ didn’t seem like Rin’s kind of game, despite everything. Realistically, there was only one other group it could be.

“I-“ Nagisa almost choked on his words, “it hasn’t mattered from b-before?”

His lips pressed tight. “We’ve had a complaint about it now. Something like this getting out, it could be devastating. It looks like we condone that type of behaviour.”

 _How terrible for them_. Breaking through the fear racing through him momentarily, he saw a slight desperation there. Nagisa realised that he could be _expelled_ at any second, if he said even slightly the wrong thing, they’d just take it as an excuse. They didn’t _want_ to expel him, though probably not out of any sympathy. No, they probably didn’t want to look awful in kicking an omega out for non disruptive offences. Much easier if Nagisa just stepped down or something.

“But nobody knew…”

“Well,” he sat up straighter, “it’s true we were also unaware. But it is all over your records, Shiota san. It only takes one person to look. Your involvement in the Kunugigaoka Middle School controversy isn’t a secret, either, and its still of interest to academics and press. You must think of what this selfishness could mean for your peers, and our institution as a whole. It puts us in a difficult position.”

They were surely just going to kick him out, then, before anything got out. And if it _did_ , they could claim ignorance, and that they did the right thing. He didn’t have time to _feel_ the panic that was clearly causing his body to shake. Or to even go through the five plans he’d have to potentially make

Nagisa briefly thought of something. “We have bond papers, it’s not like any of this is out of,” he cringed, hating the way it sounded, “ _wedlock_.”

The man beside the headmaster looked furious. “And most omegas in that position _drop_ _out_ of high school. You’re still an underage parent.”

Clearing his throat, the headmaster looked at him frankly. “We can’t make any decisions right now. We’ve already spoken with your guardians, and they won’t be able to fly in to meet us before the end of the day, so, the meeting will recommence with them on Monday.”

Nagisa sat forward. “B-but my parents only live an hour away.”

His eyes narrowed. “Yes, but as you say, you are legally bonded. Since your alpha is also a minor, our next most appropriate line of communication was with,” he looked at some files in front of him, “Akaabne san’s parents. Until then, you may return to regular classes.”

Oh no. Oh _no_. That wasn’t good at all. Karma didn’t _like_ his parents. In fact, he’d told Nagisa a few times he was glad they were living all the way in India. Nagisa was pretty certain he never spoke to them, unless it was via brief text message maybe. Why were they even _coming_? Surely, they wouldn’t have an interest in helping Nagisa get out of this. Couldn’t they have just said no? What was Karma going to say when he found out?

Sometimes, Nagisa _forgot_ he was technically a ‘child’ still. He was almost eighteen, but still a while off that golden beacon of twenty that would grant him full adult status. He was so used to acting like he was older than his age, living separately from his parents, doing boring household stuff, having a child… This threw him. They weren’t even interested in letting _him_ stand up for himself.

Nagisa got up, dismissing himself from the room as quickly as his legs would carry him. Once he was out of there, the emotions came spilling out of him finally, now he had a second to think about it. Even _if_ Karma’s parents were supposedly coming out all this way, surely they wouldn’t defend him passionately enough that he’d get out of this.

He was a little angry, then. Because he _knew_ , courtesy of Asano, that Karma chatted about his ‘home life’ all the time. And not once, he assumed, had a teacher even cared about it. Because he was an alpha, and Nagisa was an omega. He could have a kid in each continent if he wanted to, and nobody would really _care_. And it was infuriating because he couldn’t stand up and scream about everything that was wrong with that, because they didn’t want to _listen_. He’d always read about terrible things happening to omegas, but he’d never related to it through his own experiences. It wasn’t _fair_. But he didn’t want Karma to have to suffer, too.

Maybe he could get into a public high school if worst came to worst. But then he’d have to _seriously_ study for any shot at a decent university, let alone find one that would _accept_ him with an expulsion and an international incident on his permanent record. Perhaps it was only fair. Nagisa hadn’t really felt the consequences of his decision to keep Daichi, yet. Of course it was tough looking after him all those years, and there were certain normal teenage things he’d sacrificed, but nothing truly bad had happened to him.

“Have a nice meeting?” A voice called out.

Nagisa froze. He’d automatically started to walk back to class the quickest way, which meant cutting past one of the changing rooms. Unfortunately, this was during gym period for one of the other classes in the year group. Nagisa was face to face with Kuronuma, Oshiro’s friend, the guy he’d ‘assassinated’ months prior.

He continued to walk, ignoring any further attempts of goading. He’d given away that it was definitely him, nobody else would know exactly where he’d been instantly. Presumably, then, this was for revenge. Maybe Nagisa would have been angry, but it was at the back of his mind right then and there. The deed had already been done, he was irrelevant.

Nagisa spent the rest of the day not really speaking unless he really had to, until the final bell rung out. He had to, most importantly, figure out how exactly to tell Karma about his parents. Nagisa could only hope he didn’t get too upset with him, but with the way his luck was going currently, it wasn’t likely. He’d just have to brace himself.

When it came to picking Daichi up, briefly, all the bad feelings fell away. He wondered, standing there in the waiting area, if any of the other parents looked at him weird. Nagisa couldn’t say he’d ever noticed it, but then again they didn’t know his entire backstory. Or maybe, like him, they were too preoccupied with being reunited with their kids.

“Dada! Dada!” Daichi came rushing out, a screwed up piece of paper in hand. “Did ‘ragarmi.”

If he meant ‘origami’, that was certainly not what he was holding. Maybe, if Nagisa gave him the benefit of the doubt, it _had_ been something before he clearly got excited and scrunched it up in his fist. But, well, Daichi didn’t exactly have much patience. Nagisa couldn’t imagine him sitting down and carefully crafting on his own.

Nagisa bent down all the same, examining it like it was precious. “Nice job! What shape is it?”

“Uhm, boat!”

Everything was worth this. There was not even the slightest thought in his head that maybe it would have been easier if he’d gone with his initial determination to adopt out. Even the thought of it hurt him, now that he loved Daichi with somehow more than the force of his entire heart. As long as Daichi was fine, it didn’t matter what happened to _him_. It didn’t even feel like much of a sacrifice, after that.

In fact, Nagisa was happy to find him in a ‘good mood’ moment. It probably wouldn’t last all evening, but honestly a temper tantrum or two was the least of his worries right now. A part of Nagisa just wanted to hold him close and squeeze his little pouty cheeks off. But Daichi probably wouldn’t appreciate him doing that. He stull snuggled up to him… _sometimes_ …

“Do you want to stop by the park and play battle ship?” Nagisa suggested, now that he had a ‘boat’.

It was great motivation to get Daichi to agree to baths. Perhaps encouraging violence wasn’t ideal, but he seemed to get a kick out of it. Not just toy boats, though, there were also rubber ducks and fishes involved. Everything was hilarious off scale. It wasn’t a so much of a real game, aside from him tugging a toy ship around and ‘sinking’ everything else.

“Boom boom,” Daichi mimicked excitedly. “Boom! Boom! Boom!” He emphasised every ‘boom’ with an exaggerated stride.

He continued with bomb sounds all the wait out of the building, earning them some strange looks. But Nagisa didn’t care, because he couldn’t trade _anything_ about Daichi for the universe. Even if it felt like he was chasing after his craziness most of the time. Daichi stopped then, focusing on… _something_ , before throwing the paper over arm. That warranted an even bigger explosion noise, apparently.

Nagisa smiled lightly. “You just used your boat as a… grenade?”

Daichi tilted his head. “Bye bye boat.”

“Let’s just go home then, yes? Or would you still like to go to the park?”

He didn’t seem to mind the change in plans, just skipping ahead. Not that Daichi knew the way to the park, but Nagisa just took that as a signal that he wanted to go home. Well, Nagisa knew he couldn’t avoid the inevitable now. There was absolutely nothing he could do, until Monday. He couldn’t lose his nerve, right then and there.

Unusually, Karma hadn’t vacated to his own room to study by the time they actually got back. Most days, he’d come out to greet them anyway, but he was clearly sitting at the table, looking at something on his phone. Nagisa had no idea how to even begin to explain what had happened. Thankfully, Daichi was still excitable enough.

“Yo Papa!” He said, trying and almost failing to tug his own shoes off.

Nagisa narrowed his eyes. “You taught him to do the ‘yo’ thing?”

“Hey Daichan,” Karma said, allowing Daichi to run up and fling himself at his leg. “Yeah, of course I did.” He looked down at Daichi. “Hey, why don’t you go and choose something you want to wear tomorrow from your room?”

That meant he wanted to talk, alone. Daichi ran off, not even questioning it. Wow, he _was_ in a good mood.

“Karma,” Nagisa started, “I-“

Karma looked down at his phone again. “Why did my parents text me- for the first time in a year- to tell me they’re at the _airport_ and they need our address?”

“So quick?” Nagisa practically squeaked.

He stood up, though he looked concerned and confused instead of angry. “They said it was to do with you… What’s going _on_ , exactly?”

“Listen, I’ll explain, I just-“

Nagisa was cut off by the buzzer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm on my way to library to study Japanese history, ay fun. 
> 
> Anyway! Yeah, Japan really IS this backwards in sexist in some cases, IRL, so I wanted to represent that with omegas here. Yay, our first taste of the real world! References for the events of this chapter come from Good Morning Call, and Jyuu Yon Sai No Haha (14 year old mother) - both drama series. I kind of... mushed both circumstances. JYSNH is actually a really good drama, especially if you're interested in teen pregnancy in Japan lol. 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed! Or, well, are living in anticipation. Look, you had two solid chapters of fluff, it's only natural that the drama resumes.


	68. Parents Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Karma's parents arrive

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (this chapter isnt the one I cried over don't worry your little socks)

Nagisa hadn’t seen Karma’s parents since he was a first year in middle school. It wasn’t exactly how he thought his day was going to set out, to have them at their door. Uselessly, Karma’s eyes widened, but he didn’t make any move to answer it. God, Nagisa had hoped that he would have an opportunity to explain this situation first, from his own lips. No time for that though.

By the looks of things, Karma was just going to stand there like he’d seen a ghost. And Nagisa couldn’t stand the silence. This was his fault, anyway, so he decided to take the plunge in stepping forwards, right up to the doorway. Karma made no move to stop him, not in the slightest. Nagisa thought he’d have had something more to say, he was never usually this silent. He undid the latch.

The first thing Nagisa noticed, actually, was a whole lot of luggage. For some reason, that’s all his eyes could focus on, easier to zone in on the floor. He couldn’t stand the idea of looking up, direct at the problem. Nagisa was terrified, chilled to the bone, just from this presence. He didn’t know what to say or do.

“Nagisa,” Karma’s mother said, her tone sharp as a blade. “A _shame_ that we’re meeting under such circumstances.”

They’d met him before, a few times, but he realised what she actually meant. For all intents and purposes, it was like he was their son in law, now. It was a _completely_ different context. He’d never met somebody’s parents like this before. But it wasn’t exactly normal circumstances, they were in _his_ home, and with all the drama…

He tried to remember his manners. “W-welcome, Akabane san.”

It was weird, they were younger than he remembered. Since he’d only been twelve the last time he saw them, practically a child, _all_ adults had seemed generally old. But no, they were definitely both younger than Nagisa’s own parents. It was clear, Karma looked most like his mother, though he got that feeling from the sharpness of her eyes, rather than the crimson colour of her hair. Behind her, Karma’s father was silent, though it was obvious he was examining everything happening before him.

Her chin tilted up. “This place isn’t what I imagined it would be.”

Finally, Karma got a grip on himself. “What, were you picturing a mansion?”

“Well,” she met his challenge, “I assumed since you ‘don’t need our money’, you’d found yourself in a life of luxury!”

Karma glared. “So sorry for _disappointing_ you.”

His father spoke up, then. “Don’t speak to your mother like that.”

“You left the country,” Karma pointed out, “I can speak to her however I please.”

The tension was too much for Nagisa to put up with. By the looks of things, they could stand there and argue all day. Weirdly, he felt on edge, like he _really_ didn’t want them to hate him. Probably a fleeting cause, he imagined they hated him already. He _needed_ them to be on side, though Nagisa was pretty sure his school had already decided what they were going to do.

“C-can I take your coats?” Nagisa tried, the only thing he could think of.

Neither of them actually said yes, but Karma’s mother started slipping hers off. Surprisingly, despite her cool exterior, she was dressed in light and comfortable looking clothes, lightly coloured like the breeze. His father, too, was clad in a similar fashion. It really felt like they should have been wearing business suits or something. Somehow, though, it made him feel just the slightest bit more at ease. He still rushed over, taking the coats to hang up, avoiding the suitcases. Wouldn’t they have left that at their hotel?

Karma seemed to notice the luggage, too. “You’re not staying here.”

“We flew out on such short notice,” his father said, “there’s no choice.”

He didn’t seem too happy about that. “You still haven’t told me _why_.”

His mother looked directly at Nagisa. “You didn’t tell him?”

“I-I didn’t get the chance,” Nagisa admitted, feeling sick to the stomach. “It’s really hard to explain-“

“There’s a good chance of your expulsion,” his mother said, “nothing hard to say about that.”

Karma’s eyes widened, looking at Nagisa in question.

“Anyway, there are more important things to discuss right now,” she continued. “Like how we’re Nagisa’s _legal_ _guardians_? You failed to mention that, Karma.”

Nagisa swallowed, looking at Karma desperately. “That’s why my school called them.”

They ended up drifting to the table. Not the sofa, that would be far too familiar. Them on one side of it, Karma and Nagisa on the other. If Karma was annoyed at him for not saying anything, he wasn’t showing it. Choosing his battles, Nagisa figured. The atmosphere was so awkward, Nagisa could practically feel if crawling under his skin.

He hadn’t said much, all things considered, but it was Karma’s father who looked between the two of them seriously. “Why would you sign those papers?”

“M-maybe this isn’t a conversation for me,” Nagisa interjected, desperately feeling like he didn’t belong.

Karma’s mother glared at him directly. “You signed yourself into this family. That’s why we came here.”

“ _What_ papers?” Karma challenged, even though Nagisa was certain he’d caught onto at least that.

His father didn’t look impressed. “The intent of bond forms, Karma. I don’t know _what_ possessed you, at fifteen, to sign away your life like that. I thought we showed you better than that. Just how many times did we tell you how much we regretted settling down too young?”

Beside him, Karma stiffened. Nagisa felt a chill go through his body, and then a certain kind of anger. As far as he just heard it, he’d told Karma in not so many words that they regretted their lives. Regretted _him_. Karma never mentioned his parents treating him like that… But Nagisa knew he wasn’t in a situation where he could just speak up about this. He felt kind of sad, actually.

Karma sat up a little straighter. “To make life easier for our son, who we kind of owe something to, you know?”

He didn’t let up, though. “Why would you sign _those_ papers either? And you _know_ what I’m talking about. Did you really _need_ to claim paternity?”

“Why wouldn’t I?” Karma sounded a little taken aback. 

His mother leaned forward. “Because that’s going to stay with you for _life_.”

If only the floor could swallow Nagisa whole. He should be disgusted at what they were saying, really, but Nagisa couldn’t help but think how _lucky_ he was. Everyone knew the horror stories, most people in Karma’s position wouldn’t have cared, would have run off and left him to deal with it all alone. Nagisa knew he wouldn’t have been able to do it alone.

“Yeah,” Karma didn’t miss a beat, “kids are kind of permanent.”

“How are you meant to know it’s even yours?” His father challenged.

 _That_ hurt, but his feelings weren’t the most important thing in this situation, not by a long shot. He could feel cool anger, simply racing out of Karma. There couldn’t be fight, not here and now. Nagisa thought about all of this, in just a second or two, and acted first. He could feel the tension all over Karma’s consciousness, and suddenly struck, poking him hard in the throat. Immediately, he seized, rational cutting off.

“You should see him,” Nagisa finally said, as gently as he could. “He’s so much like Karma, I think I’ll mix them up one day. It’s been a little while, anyway, I should check on him.”

It wasn’t that Nagisa was just trying to leave Karma to deal with it. It didn’t matter what his parents said, it felt like just watching him get scolded, and it didn’t even involve him entirely. Well, it did involve him, but they seemed more upset at Karma’s actions. Nagisa had known, years ago now, that those bond papers hadn’t been a good idea. And now here they were.

Daichi was in his own little world, when Nagisa came into his room. He was sitting at the foot of his bed, rather than _on_ it, head stuck in one of the books he seemed to read all the time nowadays. From page to page, he flicked, not acknowledging Nagisa’s presence at all. Predictably, there were toys everywhere, which of course he hadn’t bothered to try and clean up or anything. But there was only so much you could expect out of a two year old.

He seemed to finish what he was reading, closing the book, and then his eyes widened like he was at a magic show. “Dada!”

Nagisa sat down on the floor in front of him. “Were you playing a game earlier?”

“Yeah!” He said enthusiastically. “Truck go boom, and, and-“ He started rambling, his words sounding like speech, but way too fast and mispronounced for Nagisa to actually understand what he was actually saying. He still nodded along, though, as if he truly was completely invested in the conversation.

Honestly, playing with Daichi was much better than sitting through the other conversation. In fact, there was nothing Nagisa would rather do with his time. Not that Daichi really wanted him to do much, anymore, mostly just handing Nagisa the occasional toy to hold for a few seconds. He was deep in whatever he was doing, though, fully concentrating.

Nagisa would probably hate anyone who tried to take him away, too. But he supposed Karma’s parents had left _him_ first, or something. It wasn’t something Karma ever spoke to him about, he was hardly the ‘share your feelings’ kind of person. So Nagisa didn’t understand the full situation, at all. Calling it a rocky relationship, based on that interaction.

“Where Papa?” Daichi eventually asked, like he only just noticed.

He wasn’t sure how to go about this. As far as Nagisa knew, Daichi had never met his other grandparents before. It would be easier if Daichi was older, since there was surely no way he’d be able to understand what was happening, why there were strange people he didn’t know in their apartment. Did he even really understand what grandparents were?

“You know your Grandpa and Grandpa?” Nagisa tried.

Daichi thought about it for a second. “Gra’ma and Gra’pa! Wanna go!”

He sighed. “Sorry Daichi, I didn’t mean we’re going to their house. We have to stay here tonight.”

His lower lip trembled. “But-“

The last thing anybody needed was a break down, especially on a day like this. The thing was, Nagisa almost had no idea if and when it was going to happen. Sometimes, he just got really upset out of nowhere for no reason. He tried to give it a silver lining, though, that Daichi was just getting smarter and more aware of himself. It must be overwhelming, to learn and experience so much new stuff every day.

“Hey, look at this,” Nagisa redirected his attention, rolling one of the cars into the bedframe.

Daichi lunged after it. “Big crash!”

“Actually,” he started, “most people have _two_ Grandma and Grandpas.”

He was rolling the car around. “Two?”

“Yeah,” Nagisa observed him for signs of understanding, “One set for each parent. Your _other_ grandparents are here, today.”

Daichi seemed pretty apathetic to this news, which confirmed that he didn’t understand the significance of it. That was probably better, anyway. Daichi was usually pretty good with new people, but there was no real knowing how he’d actually react. He wondered how Karma’s _parents_ would react. With the way they were talking about everything, Nagisa wasn’t sure it would be good.

“Hey.”

Nagisa looked up, just to see Karma standing there. He looked _tired_. If he thought about it, he _had_ been sitting in here for quite a while now. Had Karma’s parents been chewing him out all this time? Perhaps Nagisa shouldn’t have left him to the wolves, though he was sure Karma could handle himself. It was Nagisa’s fault they were even here though.

“Papa!” Daichi forgot his game, stretching his arms out.

Karma didn’t pick him up, instead just sitting down beside Nagisa and giving him a high five. “Looks like you’re having fun.”

“Yeah!”

He looked at Nagisa. “Did you know you’re only interested in my family’s money?”

That was… weird. “B-but you don’t even have access to that anymore, you said.”

Karma didn’t seem particularly happy. “The _best_ part is how I need to stop using you for sex.”

It was almost funny, though Nagisa spluttered, face reddening at the suggestion. It would have been, if the situation wasn’t so serious. Did Karma’s parents truly think those things about their relationship? They hadn’t outwardly disliked him _this_ much before, before he and Karma had any kind of ‘romantic’ attachment.

“They told me what happened,” Karma continued, then. “I want to know, why _now_?”

Nagisa stared at the ground. “This guy… wouldn’t leave me alone, so I guess I… used my _talent_ on him.”

Karma stiffened. “ _How_?”

“I didn’t hurt him,” Nagisa confirmed quickly, “but I think he held a grudge.”

The conversation between them tampered off, then, and instead they just turned, watching Daichi play his little game. There was something Karma wanted to say, but wasn’t. That much was obvious. But Nagisa supposed that was fair, since he hadn’t been able to tell Karma what happened to him earlier that day. It didn’t feel like this day was ever going to end.

“My parents are staying,” Karma eventually said. “I could force them not to, I guess, but it sounds like you need them or something.”

He shifted. “I don’t know what good they can possibly do. I-I know nobody’s going to listen to _me_ , anyway, but they seemed pretty certain. I think this is just a formality.”

There was a weird look on Karma’s face. “Why are you-“

“Papa!” Daichi cut him off before he could finish. It seemed like he didn’t actually have anything important to say, though, instead just loudly reminding them that he did, in fact, exist. He came over to Karma, tugging on his shoulder, as though he was attempting to climb up there.

“You wanna _go_ , Daichan?” Karma said teasingly.

They playfought like this a lot. Daichi always seemed to find it funny, trying to get at least a few good hits in. Of course, Karma was extremely careful not to actually hurt him in the process. Daichi shrieked in delight when Karma had him tipped upside down over his shoulder. He tried his best to squirm out of that hold, but of course Karma was a lot stronger, and he wasn’t just going to _let_ Daichi win.

The two of them would have happily done that for hours, but they were interrupted in the way Nagisa’s stomach eventually grumbled. Loudly. It startled even him. It was sad, actually, since he’d been enjoying briefly not thinking about everything that was going on in his life.

“I already ordered food,” Karma said, “it should be here soon.”

Did that mean pizza? Nagisa wanted pizza. “What did you order?”

He wrinkled his nose. “Indian, since it’s clearly my parents’ favourite.”

Nagisa really couldn’t help but wonder if there was something truly broken there. As far as he’d gathered, Karma had always _liked_ his independence, or at least preferred it to the idea of having strict parents. But Nagisa supposed anybody would be sad, if they felt unloved. He knew he certainly had, when his parents were freshly divorced and he didn’t really see his dad all that much.

As if on cue, the buzzer sounded out, and their little bubble of sanctuary was pierced. Karma went to go answer the door, so Nagisa took just a few seconds to linger where he was. He felt oddly nervous, at the prospect of stepping back out there, as though he was walking into a lion’s den. At least there would be food. Food was a good talking point to change an awkward topic.

Thankfully, nobody looked at him too closely. Karma’s parents were still sat at the table, dishing up their plates, though notably the luggage had been moved. At least, nobody looked at him, until of course Daichi decided to follow right after him, like some kind of lost duckling. Hopefully the amount of food to choose from would prevent him from getting stressed by relatively new people.

The tension in the room seemed to rise, though, Karma’s parents stopping mid motion. And then Nagisa remembered that Daichi was actually pretty big now. It was probably less overwhelming to meet a baby, which could only really _exist_. But at two, Daichi was aware of his surroundings, could hold a decent conversation sometimes. He was his own little person, and reminded Nagisa and Karma of that fact every day. Most people didn’t suddenly meet their grandkids when they were this old.

“Papa,” Daichi said, almost tripping over his own feet to get to where the food was. “Hungwy.”

Karma’s tone was the equivalent of an eye role. “Well, nothing’s stopping you from eating, is it?”

He climbed his way up onto a chair, looking at the selection in front of him. “ _Wow_.”

“He-He’s-“ Karma’s mother struggled to put into words.

“His birthday was a couple of months ago,” Karma said bitingly.

Nagisa sighed, not wanting to sit through another argument. “Do you wanna say hi, Daichi?”

Like he was guilty of something, Daichi froze, mouth stuffed full of food. “Uh, hi!”

Things went quiet after that, though it was less uncomfortable since everyone was eating. Nagisa noticed, though, both of Karma’s parents were more focused on watching Daichi than eating their own meal. It didn’t seem to be in a _bad_ way, if anything it was a look of awe. Nagisa was strangely pleased about that, because as humble as he was in himself, he could readily admit that his son was absolutely amazing.

“Done,” he said eventually, proudly presenting his plate.

Nagisa regarded him, realising he’d eaten quite a lot. “Good job,” he said, “hands!”

Enthusiastically, Daichi clapped his hands together, sticking them out. He seemed to think cleaning up after eating was a bit of a game, which was fine by Nagisa, since it made his cooperation ten times easier. Once Nagisa had wiped his hands clean, he worked on his mouth, which was only slightly covered in curry sauce. He was done in no time, and Daichi had had enough, squirming away.

“Wanna see,” Daichi pointed enthusiastically to the TV.

Karma caught onto exactly what he meant. “A movie? Which one?”

“Frozen!”

“ _No_.”

“Yeah!”

He groaned loudly. “You’ve seen that movie like twenty times now.”

Karma wasn’t exactly stopping him, though, getting up from the table to go put it on for him. Honestly, Nagisa didn’t understand his fascination with that movie either, but it kept him highly entertained for a couple of hours. It was the most quiet they could get him nowadays, aside from when he was reading, but he didn’t focus on that for too long.

Since they were doing that, Nagisa decided to clear everything up. Karma’s parents didn’t say anything to him, still, barely even reacted to him taking their plates. He supposed that was better than the harsh words of earlier, though. They didn’t say anything to each other, either… Nagisa wasn’t sure _what_ they were doing.

When he returned, they were halfway out of their chairs, exchanging a nod between them, before going off to Nagisa’s room. To _sleep_ , presumably. Great, absolutely great. Nagisa’s face went a little red, when he realised that meant they definitely knew about his and Karma’s sleeping arrangement. Apparently Karma didn’t care about this fact.

He flopped down on the sofa, eventually, in an attempt to stop worrying. Okay, so he’d seen this movie a couple of times recently. But he didn’t mind it so much, it wasn’t the worst thing he’d ever seen, and he knew eventually Daichi would be obsessed with something completely different, probably, anyway. So he happily sat to watch the movie, pressed pretty close to where the two of them were sitting, despite their unnecessarily large sofa.

And then Nagisa noticed that Karma was singing under his breath.

He looked up. “You know the lyrics?”

Karma stopped for a second, looking at Nagisa seriously. “Have you not noticed how often he wants to watch this movie?”

“But the _lyrics_?”

He got an evil look on his face. “ _But with you~ I see your face~ and it’s nothing like I’ve ever known before~”_

Nagisa groaned, trying to ignore the mock way Karma was staring at him, eyes sparking with mischief. “ _Stop_.”

“You know the chorus,” Karma laughed. “C’mon.”

They weren’t at karaoke! Still, Nagisa found himself joining it, but not without an eyeroll. He didn’t even know the song that well, but Karma, who had elected himself Ana’s role, seemed to be going strong right into the second verse. Maybe they really should got to karaoke. Nagisa stopped caring after a little while, singing along freely.

He laughed, at the end of the song. “Can I say something crazy….Will you marry me?”

“Can I say something crazier?” Karma said, as dramatically as he could manage. “Yes!”

The look between them was weirdly intense, after what had been pretty light hearted. Was Nagisa reading too much into it? Or-

Daichi looked up at them seriously. “ _Ew_.”

Thankfully, that broke the tension that had suddenly formed swiftly, both of them finding that reaction pretty funny. Karma laughed, ruffling Daichi’s hair, before he managed to squirm away. He actually did seem to get a little bored of the movie, then, getting off the sofa to run around. Neither of them dared turn the film off, though, in case he did decide he felt like watching it properly again.

Maybe it wasn’t the best reaction to such a serious situation, but Nagisa was happy to have his mind taken off that could only be described as his own impending doom. Things seemed simpler, on the screen of a kid’s movie. Eventually, Daichi did come sit with them again, very obviously struggling to keep his eyes open at the end.

He was asleep, before Nagisa shot Karma a look and moved to stand up, bending down to carry him. He cringed, finding Daichi quite a bit heavier than he once was, especially as dead weight. They shouldn’t have let him fall asleep like that, but Nagisa could just him a bath in the morning, he supposed. Though, trying to get him dressed into pyjamas and into bed was a bit of a challenge, without waking him up.

Nagisa got into his own night clothes, to find Karma was already lying on top of the bed, deep in thought. Maybe he should say something, but he didn’t know how. Honestly, Nagisa was surprised Karma wasn’t completely mad at him, considering this entire situation was his own fault. He _deserved_ his anger.

“Karma-“

His eyes flicked open. “Hey, wanna mildly piss them off?”

Nagisa’s face contorted in confusion. “Your parents? How-“

Definitely having a plan on hand, Karma reached behind him, forcefully smacking the wall behind the headboard. “Oh, yeah, Nagisa. _Harder_!”

He went red, ever so red. Like he was going to spontaneously combust. “ _What are you doing_?”

“Nothing they clearly don’t think we already are,” he justified, and then lunged, shoving his hand underneath Nagisa’s armpit.

Nagisa squeaked. “Ah- Karma!”

He grinned. “Perfect.”

“No!” Nagisa said in horror, fully realising what he was trying. “I’m not going to partake in… _sex noises_.”

“Fine,” he replied simply, “I’ll just do it on my own. Mmm,” he raised his voice, “right there!”

Nagisa had to stop him, immediately, or he wouldn’t be able to look Karma’s parents in the _eye_. Since Karma had strength on his side, Nagisa had to move with the force of his whole body, leaping on top of him so he could have a hope of pinning him down. Thankfully, Karma hadn’t been expecting it, so Nagisa managed to get his shoulder held down on the bed, shoving a hand over his mouth to silence him.

“You’re only helping,” he said, though it was muffled. “With the noise.”

Nagisa removed his hand and turned away. “Just go to sleep.”

“I would,” he said, “but you’re blocking my access to the lamp.”

He climbed off him, then, lying so his back was turned away from Karma in mock annoyance. He clearly wasn’t that effected by the gesture, though, still swinging an arm over Nagisa’s body, spooning up to him from behind. Nagisa was, admittedly, used to this, and would probably struggle to sleep without it nowadays. He couldn’t resist, pressing himself back closer so Karma knew that he wasn’t annoyed enough to hold a grudge.

Nagisa didn’t dream that often, or if he did, he didn’t remember it, since he tended to wake up naturally with a decent amount of rest. That night, however, Nagisa had some kind of image. It was weird and abstract, but Nagisa knew he had to run away from it. He went as fast as he could, until he bumped into something. Someone. _Karma_. The dream shifted then, his brain somehow latching onto the last night’s activities.

Even asleep, a part of him knew this wasn’t exactly right. It didn’t seem to matter so much, though, as dream Karma’s arms wrapped around his body, lips going to his neck. Naturally, Nagisa arched against him, closing the small gap between them. The words weren’t exactly clear, but as fake and overdramatic as they’d been, Nagisa became weak as dream Karma repeated the moans he’d made.

He blinked awake, still in Karma’s arms, but fully clothed. Karma’s lips were pressed to his neck, but he was actually minorly drooling on him, rather than kissing. Nagisa would have been grossed out, but if anything he felt hot, _too_ hot, especially between his legs. Knowing he had no time to waste, Nagisa extracted himself as quickly as he could, without waking Karma up, heart pounding in his chest. He reached for the emergency scent blocker he had stashed for, well, _emergencies_ , and sprayed it over the place his body had just occupied.

Nagisa wasn’t even sure what time it was, but he needed to shower. The feeling of slick between his thighs had _never_ been pleasant, even if it thankfully wasn’t a lot. He was still hot all over, by the time he got there, but he refused to _do anything about it_. There was no way, with how much Karma was currently occupying his mind, that he’d be able relieve himself and not think about him. And he couldn’t go there. So, he turned the shower temperature down, and suffered.

It wasn’t ridiculously early, he realised afterwards, so on somewhat of a whim Nagisa decided to cook breakfast. Usually, they were too busy for anything that fancy, especially if Nagisa wanted to stay in bed as long as possible. But that wasn’t an issue today, on the weekend. Besides, they did have guests, no matter how bad the circumstances of them being there were.

He was actually surprised to see Karma’s mother come out of the bedroom, just about the time he’d finished preparing the food. Fortunately, it was the kind of thing you could just cook when you wanted it, once the preparation was over. She blinked, too, like she surprised to see him.

“Good morning,” Nagisa said, as politely as he could manage. “Would you like tea or coffee or anything?”

She sat down at the table. “Sencha, if you have it.”

It was like he forgot how to make tea, right then and there. He left the actual food aside, and watched the water boil like a hawk. Like the tea would turn bitter if the temperature was just a degree off. When he was a lot younger, he got pretty good at making tea, realising it always seemed to put his own mother in a better mood.

“Here you are,” he set it down carefully, lowering his head.

She tilted her head. “Nagisa, if all I wanted was a submissive omega housewife for my son, I’d be less upset about this bond contract of yours.”

He wasn’t sure how to react to that. “I-I-“

“Relax. You must think we hate you,” she said steadily. “On the contrary, had the circumstances been different, I think I’d approve of the relationship. Karma’s always carried so much anger, I’ve seen it in him since he was a child. That seems to fade a little, when he’s next to you.”

Nagisa _really_ wasn’t sure how to respond. Was it some kind of backhanded compliment? “We’ve… been through a lot, together.”

She looked solemn. “We’re not traditionalists, even if our concerns might make it seem that way. My husband and I married and started a family before we knew what was good for us, before we’d even lived our lives. If I could do it over, another way, I would. I never wanted Karma to have to live with that kind of a weight.”

“I don’t,” Nagisa swallowed, “I don’t think I could _ever_ say something like that. Not to anyone, certainly not to my son. It wasn’t the life I imagined myself having, but I’ve never wanted to go back and _change_ it. I think Karma would say the same.”

“There you go,” she looked at him more directly. “You can drop the act now. You _are_ opinionated, I won’t be offended.”

“It’s not an act,” Nagisa defended, somehow finding an inner strength. “Or an opinion. _Anybody_ would think their parents don’t care about them, if they directly say they wish they’d never had them.”

She took a sip from her tea, like she was unsurprised. “Yes, I suppose neither of us were the best at expressing our emotions, or the best parents. I regret that, too. Perhaps you won’t believe that, but I do love him, I think it’s _hard_ not to love your own son.”

A part of Nagisa wanted to argue. Because he _knew_ what it was like to love a child. He knew how much it blinded him, how he wouldn’t hesitate to do anything for him. And he’d had that love since the moment he first held him, held him and never wanted to let go. The idea of leaving Daichi _on_ _his_ _own_ for any quantity of time, when it wasn’t necessary, made him feel sick.

“The food smells good,” she changed the subject. “Do you cook often?”

Nagisa turned back towards kitchen. “N-not really. Karma showed me how to make this, though.”

She sniffed, testing the air. “Aloo Paratha? He liked it a lot when he was younger, too.”

“All Daichi ever seems to want to eat is pancakes in the morning,” he said, “and this is a similar enough compromise.”

Finally, a gentle smile came on her face. “He’s a sweet boy, from what I can tell. I feel like he’s intelligent too. You’ve raised him well.”

What was he supposed to say to that? _Thank you_?

She coughed. “You’re intelligent, too, Nagisa. Why would you sign yourself over as property so freely? I don’t believe Karma would have forced you, at least I certainly _hope_ that.”

“H-he didn’t,” Nagisa said, somewhat taken aback. “The only reason I did was so that we’d look like a real couple on paper. I- I couldn’t stand the idea of Daichi being judged, because of _our_ mistakes. I trusted that Karma wouldn’t use his,” he cringed, “ _ownership_ in a bad way. We never thought it would impact anybody else, though. I’m sorry for it.”

Her eyes were wide. “You _love_ him.”

Nagisa practically jumped. “I-“

She waved him off. “I’m not upset. I think just about anyone would be overjoyed, to realise their child is loved wholly by someone decent.”

Any longer, and he was going to freak out. His feelings for Karma confused him to the core, and for someone to just put an easy _label_ on it… A year and a half ago, Nagisa would have agreed, easily. But then he dated, and whilst he was sure now that he hadn’t been saying ‘love’ with his _heart_ to Rin, it still complicated things. And now, Nagisa didn’t understand his own emotions. Wasn’t sure if ‘love’ was even the right word to describe the storm Karma raged inside his heart.

“I’ll help you stay at your school,” she said suddenly, “with all the power I can. And I’m sure my husband will do the same. No matter your intentions, for all intents and purposes, you’re an Akabane now. And I’ll tell you one thing, our family doesn’t give _up_ when there’s a problem.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *drama intensifies* 
> 
> This turned out... weirdly fluffy. The song Karma and Nagisa were singing is 'Love Is An Open Door', by the way, if that wasn't clear. Hmm. Calm before the storm, my friends. 
> 
> In other news, my exams are FINALLY over. Now it's just... two tests a week, once again. Yeah, university is hard. 
> 
> As always, I love and appreciate all comments and feedback!


	69. Confession Time - Third Period

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The meeting between Karma's parents and the school arrives.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~Nice to see you all appreciated my little joke~ 
> 
> Get ready to scream at me.

Nagisa tried his best to swallow down the nerves in his stomach. After a very long and confusing weekend, it was finally the morning before the meeting. Even though Nagisa was pretty much convinced that his expulsion was guaranteed at this point, but Karma’s mother had inflated his hopes a little. If he dared hope.

It was clear that whatever else they were aside, Karma’s parents were very intelligent. That made sense, Nagisa supposed. Karma had to get it from _somewhere_. Maybe there really was a way around it, maybe… They weren’t telling him, but Karma’s parents seemed to have figured out their plan. They were more like silent thinkers, Nagisa realised.

“One, two…” Daichi was looking at the spoons on the table, “uhm, four…”

“ _Three_ ,” Karma’s father corrected him.

“Oh.”

Aside from what Karma’s mother had said, during their brief conversation a couple of days ago, Nagisa wasn’t really sure how they felt about Daichi. In Daichi’s case, he seemed to have adjusted to the new people in his life pretty quickly. But he’d never really shown much stranger anxiety before anyway. Perhaps that was a good thing.

“That was pretty close, you know,” he said, and then went silent again. Almost like he was brooding.

Karma’s mother sipped her tea. She drunk a lot of the stuff, apparently. “Though didn’t you say reading came more naturally?”

“Y-yeah,” Nagisa said. He wasn’t exactly the show off kind of parent, but he _was_ proud. “I think he was able to read ‘dog’, last week. It’s improving really fast.”

She smiled. “I remember when Karma was leaning to read.”

Karma coughed, not so subtly. “Surely that was the nanny’s job, not yours.”

“You still showed me,” she didn’t miss a beat, “you were so pressed about it!”

“I think I’ll go off now,” he replied, somewhat darkly.

He hated this game of happy families, Nagisa could tell. It made him feel guilty, because he knew Karma was only tolerating it for his sake. At least it would be over, in just a few hours. Nagisa was honestly pretty happy about that, no matter the result of the meeting, it was better to know for definite what course his life might now take.

“Papa?” Daichi looked up in confusion, as Karma started reaching for his coat.

Karma bent down, once he had it on. “You’re coming with me a little early today, Daichan.”

It made more sense, due to the meeting. But Daichi, thankfully, didn’t seem to mind that his routine was slightly changing. He hopped down from the table, going over to the entrance to find his shoes. Honestly, he really _was_ pretty smart. In only a few years, he’d have to start school for real, though, and Nagisa wasn’t sure how to feel about that.

“Have a good day,” Nagisa called out.

Daichi was in his own little world, though he still turned around. “Bye bye.”

Similarly, Karma nodded at him, which was as close to ‘good luck’ as he was going to get.

Pressure refiled the atmosphere, then. At least with Daichi around, things weren’t just _quiet_. Nagisa wasn’t really sure how to strike up a conversation with Karma’s parents. Despite that conversation, and their agreement to help him, Nagisa was still pretty sure they resented him. But there didn’t seem a lot he could do to actually fix that, honestly.

“What are you worried about?” Karma’s mother asked smoothly.

He jolted. “Things c-could still go really badly.”

Karma’s father leant back in his chair. “You should have more faith.”

“We should probably leave soon, too,” Nagisa tried, “my school’s a little far away.”

It was more than a little awkward, shuffling out to school with other people. Nagisa was so used to his walk by then that it was weird to be accompanied, most days he would keep his head down and walk as fast as he could. They still maintained silence between them, though Nagisa noticed Karma’s parents seemed to be looking around quite a lot, as if they were floating through a dream word.

Thankfully, by the time they got on the train, the lack of conversation wasn’t weird. Kunugigaoka had always been quite a respectful town. Like most days, Nagisa just stared out of the window, as the train sped between towns. But this time, he realised it might be the last time he saw the blurs of the scenery around him, and he felt a kind of sadness in his chest.

They waited outside the office he’d originally heard his fate in, on a few plastic chairs. Nagisa still felt like a guest here, sandwiched between two parents who didn’t really belong to him. He wasn’t really sure how to cope that this was the reality of what was happening, that there was still a good chance that he’d be expelled at any moment.

“Please do come in,” one of who Nagisa assumed were the board members, gestured at the door.

It didn’t feel as scary, now he wasn’t completely on his own, with the authority opposite him. Reading their expressions, Nagisa wasn’t sure what everyone was thinking. They seemed guarded, chins tilted up like they were looking down on him. Something in him deflated, like he knew their minds were already made up.

The headmaster looked between them all. “In the interests of keeping this situation at minimum, I would like to give Shiota san the opportunity to voluntarily step down, which would mean none of this would appear on his permanent record.”

“We’re not interested,” Karma’s mother said sharply.

He inhaled. “Very well, then. After much consideration, I’m afraid we don’t have any other choice but to terminate Shiota san’s education here.”

Nagisa couldn’t _breathe_.

“Tell me,” Karma’s father spoke up, “which rule you believe has been breached?”

The headmaster gulped. “There’s not necessarily an explicit _rule_ , but as a private institution, we have full discretion over matters-“

He stood up. “That’s _ridiculous_. How are students supposed to know what sort of _lifestyle_ , if you refuse to refer to them as rules, to abide by, if they’re not listed anywhere? Even the most well respected companies have an employment contract. Yes, they’re ultimately left up to the boss’ interpretation, but those guidelines still exist. As an educational facility, as well as enriching the mind, is it not your responsibility to prepare your students for that working environment?”

“Underage pregnancy is a given for anywhere,” he said, tiredly.

Karma’s mother cleared her throat. “But, the child was born before Nagisa was even officially accepted into this school. By that logic, if you’re truly looking into the backstories of all of your students, then you had no issue with it before. That suggests some time during the last two years, you changed your policies. But… there was no written notice of this on record.”

Nagisa hadn’t even thought about that. Technically, he hadn’t even sat the entrance exam until the day after Daichi was born. A spark of hope started to burn in his chest. For the first time, Nagisa _really_ saw how alike Karma was to his parents. They could fight, like this. They really might save him.

The board members looked at each other, and sweat beaded down the headmaster’s face. “B-but the cohabitation…”

She smirked. “Ah, yes, _that_.”

Karma’s father looked over at her, matching the expression. “Rules without clear purpose are a little Orwellian, don’t you think? I can’t say I’ve ever been an educator, but surely the goal of it is to prevent anything inappropriate from happening. However! Nagisa is _bonded_ to our son.”

“You recognise that,” Karma’s mother looked down at him, “or else we wouldn’t have been contacted as his proper guardians. Clearly, Nagisa’s birth parents have given their consent for this arrangement, and we have no issue with it. It’s hardly inappropriate. Traditionally, omegas have always bonded young. Expulsion on that basis would look more like intolerance to omegas in general, no?”

“I-“

“Of course,” Karma’s father continued, “any kind of rumour is best to avoided. I trust you have the resources to properly contain anything from getting out. We, too, will provide a moderate financial donation to assist in this cause, as well as to further ensure this institution thrive – _without_ this particular issue coming up again.”

The headmaster looked absolutely terrified. “V-very well. W-we graciously accept your generosity. Shiota san w-will clearly continue his studies here.”

“Come on, Nagisa,” Karma’s mother said kindly, standing up to leave the room like that had been nothing at all.

On shaking legs, Nagisa followed them both, unsure of what had actually just _happened_. They’d… done it, like it was nothing. During that whole thing, he’d felt much like a fly on the wall than an actual participant, oddly detached. They were _powerful_ people, with how quickly they’d convincingly unravelled that entire situation.

He was grateful, so grateful. Nagisa demonstrated it with a proper bow. “ _Thank_ _you_.”

“It’s nothing,” Karma’s mother said. “Karma’s been _almost_ expelled many times, and he was actually guilty those times.”

“Still,” Nagisa said, “I practically owe you my _life_.”

Karma’s father sighed. “Don’t make it a habit, Nagisa. Anyway, our flight is in an hour.”

That stopped him right in his tracks. In an hour? Sure, Nagisa hadn’t expected them to hang around much after everything was settled, but they were just darting straight off. Something left an awful taste in his mouth at the realisation. Was it like this every time they went somewhere? Did they usually slip away with little fanfare?

“Drawn out goodbyes don’t do anybody any good,” Karma’s mother said. “This was always the plan. We’ll be seeing you, Nagisa.”

He wanted to yell at them that this was wrong, _awful_ , but the words just wouldn’t come out. By the time he could even consider standing up to it, their backs were turned, and they were already have gone. Karma must have been used to this kind of treatment, the way it was handled so casually. It wasn’t like Nagisa could claim to have had a good relationship with his parents when he was younger, but he would have been worse if he felt abandoned like that.

But there was nothing Nagisa could do to fix it. Regardless of everything else, Nagisa still did owe them a great debt. Finally, he could let out the tension, because he was going to be okay again. Not that he’d been afraid of it before, but at least now he also knew that his position he was secure, for the foreseeable future.

Nagisa was actually pretty happy to return to class, since thinking he wouldn’t be allowed to again. He just hated the small amount of commotion it caused, walking in once a lesson had already started. Of course their teacher had to stop midsentence, and everyone turned to look at him as walked over to his desk. But that didn’t matter, really.

“You were gone a while,” Kita said, slight surprise lacing her tone, when the break started.

Nagisa looked down. “I… Had a meeting.”

“Sounds scary,” Nishi said, a gentle smile at his lips.

And then Nagisa thought that maybe he should just tell them the truth. Higashi already knew everything, albeit by accident, and she hadn’t hated him for it. But how was Nagisa supposed to bring something that significant up, after so long? It wasn’t exactly the easiest topic to just bring up out of the blue. 

Higashi leant over. “What was that even about, anyway?”

“Daichi,” he said, before he lost his nerve, “and Karma, and everything else they found out about. But it’s all settled now.”

Kita squinted. “ _Who_?”

He swallowed down as much air as possible. “My son.”

Of course, he had to explain after that. It was really hard to put everything into words, but he found himself talking for quite a while, drifting into his own world, almost, as he laid everything out. Nobody interrupted him, or asked any questions, so he just kept going, until really he’d run out of things to add.

There were a few beats, after he’d finished talking, and then Kita cleared her throat. “Nagisa kun… Why didn’t you just tell us?”

He was taken aback by that. “I-It didn’t really come up at first, and after that it seemed a bit weird to suddenly mention it after so long.

“He really is a cute kid,” Higashi said, breaking the silence.

Kita and Nishi looked at her with open mouths. “ _You knew_?!”

She smiled awkwardly. “Ahaha, yeah… Kind of.”

“I think it’s pretty cool,” Nishi said. “weird, but also… I can kind of picture you being a parent.”

Nagisa felt a lot better, now that they were talking about it, like a gust of fresh air swirling around his soul. He could stay, without fear, and now he wasn’t keeping anything from anybody. He really hadn’t had a good time with the stress, he realised now the weight tugging him down was gone. He was strangely ready to move on with his life now.

Thankful to be allowed _in_ them, Nagisa payed a lot of attention to the last classes of the day. There was still a part of him, though, that couldn’t stop worrying about the catalyst of this entire situation. That guy, Kuronuma, had to have quite a lot of hatred for Nagisa, to try and get him _expelled_. Nagisa didn’t really like having enemies.

He got through the rest of the day, though. As much as he was grateful to be allowed to stay, he was also looking forward to going back home. Seeing Daichi again… It almost seemed like the older he got, the more Nagisa hated leaving him. Which was surely the opposite of how it was supposed to be. When he got old enough to reasonably be allowed out of an adult’s sight, Nagisa wasn’t sure how he was going to handle it. Weirdly, he was looking forward to seeing Karma, too, a fluttery feeling in his chest.

…What he wasn’t expecting was to see him so _soon_. But, as he came out of school, like he did pretty much every other day, Karma was _waiting_ for him. Nagisa briefly looked down at his phone, but there was no message there to tell him that this was the plan. This was odd, Karma hadn’t just shown up like this before. Had something happened?

“Hi, Karma kun!” Higashi said pleasantly.

Karma smiled back, like this was casual. “Yo, it’s been a while.”

“I...” She looked at Nagisa, “I can’t stay around and talk today, but it was nice seeing you!”

Nagisa stared at Karma. “Uhm, what are you doing here?”

“I’m happy to see you too,” Karma said dryly. “I got out of school a little early, so I thought I’d come see how things went today.”

“You skipped, didn’t you?”

He didn’t seem fazed. “Does it matter?”

“Oh, Shiota chan!”

They both turned around, staring at the boy who had shouted. Nagisa’s heart sunk, when he saw Kuronuma’s smug face right in front of him. He really hadn’t chosen a good moment, no. Especially with Karma here…

“I’m surprised to see you’re still here,” he continued.

Karma tilted his head. “Why’s _that_?”

“ _Karma_ ,” Nagisa warned.

He knew when a fight was worth having, and this was not one of those times. It wasn’t as if Nagisa was happy about being walked over and insulted, or that he couldn’t defend himself. But it wasn’t worth it. He felt sick, feeling the dread set over him. If Kuronuma was that angry with him for winning in a fight, then he would be livid with what was about to happen.

“I’m just happy to see my friend,” he clapped Nagisa on the back.

Karma’s eyes narrowed. “Friend?”

Kuronuma didn’t give up the challenge. “Sure.”

“And he _lets_ you call him ‘Shiota Chan’, does he?”

He didn’t look phased. “What’s it to you?”

 _Stupid_. Nagisa felt like he was watching a car crash happen right in front of his eyes, and there was no way he could prevent it. What, it wasn’t like Karma was ever going to listen to him. And Kuronuma had walked right into his fury. He saw Karma’s face morph with not so subtle anger, and his hand came down on the back of Kuronuma’s neck.

“Why don’t we go continue this conversation somewhere else?” It wasn’t an invitation.

Kuronuma stood up a little straighter. “No.”

His eyes flashed. “Well, if you _want_ me to tear you to shreds in front of your entire student body, that can be arranged.”

“W-why don’t you try me,” Kuronuma looked around nervously, like he was trying to locate the backup who just weren’t coming.

“Mmm, tempting, tempting,” Karma was looking down at him, “I’d rather just give you the warning to not bother Nagisa again, though. A little less messy, no?”

Nagisa _couldn’t_ let them come to blows. “Karma,” he said again, “ _please_ don’t.”

“Yeah,” Kuronuma said, “listen to your _omega_ bitch.” 

Karma’s shoulders filled with tension. “Sorry,” he stepped closer, “I’m not sure I heard you right.”

Somehow, Nagisa saw it coming before it happened. Before Kuronuma had the chance to react, Karma delivered a swift knee, aimed right at his liver. With the way his breath caught, and his body crumpled in half, Nagisa knew it had been a direct hit. Kuronuma looked like he was going to _throw up_ , definitely not able to fight back.

“You still wanna _go_?” Karma said, forcing his head up by grabbing his hair roughly.

Nagisa looked around nervously, realising a bunch of people had gathered around them to watch what was happening. The Rin situation, although was old news, had not faded from anybody’s memories. Nagisa being caught up in yet more violence… was not good. He also really didn’t want Karma to get into any kind of trouble for random assault.

“That’s enough,” Nagisa tried a little more firmly. “He _gets_ it.”

Karma dropped him. “Count yourself lucky.”

Unsure of what else he could possibly do, Nagisa grabbed him by the wrist. “Let’s go, Karma.”

Surprisingly, Karma allowed Nagisa to pull him away like that, but Nagisa felt the anger buzz under his skin still. He was still in the mood for a fight. What was Nagisa supposed to do now, try and calm him down? Honestly, the more Nagisa thought about it, the more bothered _he_ became. Hadn’t they had this exact argument, months ago? Karma had even said it was wrong, then, to just _beat up_ whoever Nagisa had an issue with, hadn’t he?

“I should have kept going until he cried,” Karma said, clearly annoyed. “He was about to.”

Nagisa stopped in his tracks. “You don’t have to fight my battles for me.”

He stuffed his hands in his pockets. “I never said I had to.”

“But I don’t _want_ you to,” Nagisa protested.

They’d stopped right in front of a smaller alleyway. Nagisa could tell, because Karma paused to look down it, apparently concerned _now_ about arguing in public like this. He tugged Nagisa that way, almost holding him against the wall so that they could have this conversation relatively out of view. He was pretty sure, just from the way Karma’s face was morphed, he was still in fight mode.

“Why not?” Karma questioned, clearly holding down the growl under the surface.

“B-because!” Nagisa tried to keep his head high. “They’re my problems, not your problems. And I don’t think violence is the best way to solve them.”

Karma’s head tilted. “Didn’t you say the whole reason this happened was because of violence? You should have just gone all the way, not left him unsatisfied enough to come back and hate you.”

It left a bad taste in Nagisa’s mouth. So apparently this whole situation was _his_ fault. And perhaps he’d been internalising that anyway, but that didn’t mean Karma was entitled to just give his _opinion_. It was getting underneath Nagisa’s skin, but he didn’t really know how to put it into words. Karma was so close to him nowadays, they practically spent all of their time together. Nagisa had never been annoyed by that before… _Was_ he even annoyed?

“W-why do you want to control my life so badly?” Nagisa settled on, and immediately knew that hadn’t come out right.

Karma took a step back. “So now I’m _controlling_ you?”

“Kind of!” Nagisa just about got out. No, he wasn’t putting it into words the right way, not at all. It was like… Something weird, something he couldn’t put his finger on. But Karma was always _there_ , by his side, in his head… Nagisa was suffocating.

“ _How_?” Karma continued. “I’ve never forced you to do anything, or even tried.”

And then Nagisa felt like he should just back down. As mad as he was about the fighting, there was something deeper going on, something that wasn’t really Karma’s fault, or at least Nagisa didn’t think so. And now wasn’t the right time to bring it up. No, it wasn’t really annoyance he felt, it was a kind of fear. But he didn’t want to just let this slip either.

“M-maybe those weren’t the right words, but-“

Karma’s expression darkened. “You have no fight in you Nagisa.”

“W-what?”

“You don’t stand up for yourself!” He turned, eyes flashing wild. “You just… Give up, and it pisses me off. And then when you _start_ , you hold back. For once in your life, fight for something!”

Nagisa tried to stand firm. “How can I do that when you’re _telling_ me to?!”

“Fight me,” Karma half growled.

Nagisa felt his heart drop to his feet. What did Karma mean, physically fight him? They were arguing _about_ fighting, initially. It was more than that for both of them, though, clearly. They shouldn’t fight about this, they should talk, maybe. But the more Karma looked at him like that, the more the tension built, the more Nagisa _wanted_ to fight him, regardless of how counterproductive it was.

“Don’t be _ridiculous_ ,” Nagisa hissed.

“Why not?” Karma’s head tilted up. “I know you want to, I see it over your face. Come on then, let’s go.” He stepped towards him, and slapped him backhand on the shoulder. “C’mon,” he hit him again, “ _c’mon_.”

Nagisa threw a punch. This wasn’t like the last time he’d done it, when he was just frustrated and hadn’t _really_ intended to hit, deep down. No, this time he struck Karma right in the face. And, frustratingly, it kind of felt good. Despite that, though, Karma didn’t move, didn’t flinch. That made Nagisa feel awful, like it hadn’t really changed anything, and now all he was left was an empty heart and an aching fist.

“That all you got?” Karma said casually, like he hadn’t just been punched.  

And then the irritation returned, and Nagisa struck again, the side of his arm into Karma’s chest, that time. He wasn’t just going to stand down (even though, a small voice inside him warned that this was exactly what Karma had wanted in the first place). This time, Karma actually dodged, focusing properly. Of course, they were both trained in combat. But Nagisa was a little worried, considering Karma’s superior strength, and the fact that Nagisa had been banned from participating in lessons like this in the later part of his pregnancy. They weren’t evenly matched in fighting, so Nagisa was going to have to look for a chip in his defence, and _quickly_.

Karma reached out, grabbing a hold of his school tie, and yanked him forward. That was one hand occupied, good. But, Nagisa had been jerked too quickly to be fully in control of his own arms. So, working on quick instinct, he jumped. Grabbing onto Karma’s arm, his legs flew up, winding around Karma’s neck in a choke. With Nagisa’s _entire weight_ practically on one arm, he folded in half, slamming him onto the ground. Despite how much that hurt his back, Nagisa gripped tighter.

“I’m _not_ just a push over!”

If Karma wanted to respond to that, he couldn’t, not with the way Nagisa was cutting off his airway. He’d have to give up soon, lest he actually pass out. But, Karma was also _ridiculously_ strong. After just a few seconds, though his arm was shaking, he slowly managed to pick Nagisa back up again. Nagisa started to panic, but, surely Karma couldn’t hold out much longer.

His back was slammed, hard, into something, which caused his legs to spring free. When he realised he wasn’t falling to the ground, and had instead been dumped on what he realised was a closed dumpster, his legs closed again. However, from the angle, he’d attached himself to Karma’s hips rather than his neck. He could still use the force to pull them closer, to get another hit in, so he did just that, using what upper strength he did have to pull himself up right, so he could throw a swing.

This time, Karma caught his wrist, but didn’t take the opportunity to get another hit in. Instead, he just looked at his wrist, and then Nagisa’s face, and then he grabbed the back of his head with his free hand and _kissed_ him. Nagisa’s brain short circuited, _of course it did_ , because that was the _last_ thing he’d been expecting. His wrist went limp, the fight instantly leaving him. Karma dropped it, his hand moving to grip his back, pushing them closer together.

The last time they’d kissed, it had been surrounded by the classmates in middle school (Nagisa couldn’t bring himself to count that time a few months ago, since he’d been so delirious with heat he barely remembered). Since then, he’d kissed a few people, for a few various reasons. But, none of those times had felt quite _this_.

He couldn’t put it into words, other than being barrelled over like a tornado hit him. His blurry memories of Karma being a good kisser, although also forceful, were correct. There wasn’t a lot Nagisa could reasonably do to resist this, so he didn’t, instead wrapping his arms around the back of Karma’s neck to pull him closer still.

Once Nagisa had down that, Karma stopped holding back, deepening the kiss so that Nagisa’s head started to spin. What did this _mean_? They hadn’t exactly been acting like normal friends… recently. Was this some kind of _confession_? Not that Nagisa had imagined Karma confessing any kind of feelings, but he wasn’t always the verbal type, not on serious things. Did this mean they were… _together_ now, or something?

Nagisa’s heart fluttered at the thought, briefly distracting himself enough that Karma was able to slip his tongue in. Like a spark of electricity shot up his spine, Nagisa melted, like a puppet on Karma’s string. He’d gotten _better_ at this. An unpleasant drop of jealousy went through him at the thought of Karma practicing kissing on anybody else. Possessively, he dug his nails into the skin of his neck, tugging Karma’s lower lip roughly between his teeth. _Mine_.

If being together meant _this_ , then in that moment Nagisa wanted nothing more in the world. Nagisa may have kissed a lot of people, but this finally felt wholly right, where he belonged. Between their bodies, pressed right together, there was a steady heat building. For just a seconded, Nagisa thought that maybe their fight didn’t matter, not when there was this _fire_. It was terrifying, but, if this wasn’t love, Nagisa didn’t know _what_ was.

But… They argued a lot. Hadn’t they been arguing just now? It was meant to be a _fight_ , not… Suddenly, the heat turned ice cold, and Nagisa turned his head away, panting to catch his breath. Karma didn’t move either, doing the same. Regarding him, Nagisa wasn’t sure what to think anymore. It wasn’t exactly the mature way to deal with things, fighting and then making out over it. They were like that, close one moment, and then unable to talk to each other for weeks at a time. What if there were real feelings involved? What if it was worse? Nagisa remembered how awful it was, watching his own parents fight all the time. He couldn’t do that, in good conscience, but he also couldn’t see he and Karma having a perfectly good relationship either. Nagisa felt sick, because no matter what this love was, that wasn’t healthy.

“Karma,” he swallowed, and then the rest of the words got caught up in his throat.

Karma reached out, taking a strand of hair between his fingers. “ _Nagisa_.”

He looked like he was going to kiss him again, and Nagisa’s heart shattered, but he put a hand between them. “We can’t do this.”

They weren’t good for each other. Nagisa felt like he’d always known that, deep down. They’d been physically _fighting_. Karma had come _so_ far since the days of senseless violence, but in Nagisa’s name, that didn’t seem to matter. And Nagisa… his bloodlust had been slipping out a lot recently, admittedly in relation to Karma, hadn’t it? They brought out each other’s worst, not their best.

There was something else, Nagisa knew, something he couldn’t consciously admit to himself. Having lived so long with the knowledge that no matter what, he couldn’t have Karma, he was used to it now. A certain kind of fear, fear of the unknown, was about to swallow him whole. Nagisa wasn’t ready for the opposite to be true, after all of this time. He was _scared_.

“We-” Nagisa started, when Karma said nothing at all. “I-, Karma, I-“

His golden eyes looked so _icy_. “What is this?”

He loved Karma, was in love with him, probably always had been since the day they _met_. And Nagisa realised above all else, he wanted what was best for Karma. And that wasn’t him. He could never be enough for him, could never be what he needed. Nagisa had known that for a while now, really, but it felt more real now. He needed to let him go.

“Nothing,” Nagisa forced out, physical pain coming with it. “It _can’t_ be anything. Karma, we-we’re no good for each other. So,” he swallowed the sob that threatened to rise up, “I’m s-sorry.”

“ _Nothing_ ,” Karma looked down at the ground. “This is nothing to you.”

“That’s not what I mea-“

“No,” his eyes narrowed, “I heard you loud and clear.”

Nagisa hopped down from the dumpster, turning away from him. “Go home,” his voice cracked. “I’ll go pick Daichi up like normal. That’s the most important thing, isn’t it?”

A part of Nagisa yearned for Karma to stop him from walking away, to grab him by the wrist and fight for him all over again. But he didn’t, he just stood there, and honestly it was probably for the best. Nagisa couldn’t _take_ anything else. So, he walked, trying his best to ignore how wet his eyes became with every step. Without looking back over his shoulder, Nagisa felt like he’d just lost a colossal part of himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the chapter I was talking about listening to When The Party's Over and crying over on tumblr lol. I just hate 'break ups'. It really fits, imo, though. 
> 
> Uhm, well, one step forward, five steps back? Not gonna say anything else, just going to brace for your collective wrath :') Until next time~


	70. Nightmare Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nagisa adjusts to life after his and Karma's fight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was listening to High School Musical writing this

It wasn’t a break up, but it felt like one. It felt like more of a break up than the time Nagisa actually was broken up with someone. It was like he’d entered into this realm of near permanent misery. Most people didn’t have to see their ex every day, certainly didn’t have to live with them. Again, Karma wasn’t even his ex, but apparently that didn’t seem to matter.

He knew it was a good thing, all in all. Had Nagisa kissed him back like he knew he could’ve, then who knows what might have happened. Nagisa was sure, and he stuck by it, that it would have just ended in more pain for everyone involved. There were still the unfortunate side effects of that, though. He couldn’t help but miss the good bits, their real friendship.

Karma seemed to be acting like nothing ever even happened. They weren’t spending any more time together than they physically had to, nor talking, but when they did interact it was like he’d erased it from his memory. Perhaps that was for the best, rather than the both of them moping around. Karma was an impossible person to read, really, so Nagisa wasn’t sure whether he actually meant it, or if he was just putting on an act.

“Are you putting your shoes on or are you just sitting there?”

Of course, Nagisa had more immediate issues to be dealing with.

Daichi looked up at him innocently. “Uh, sitting!”

“Aren’t you,” he crouched down more to his level, “aren’t you excited to see your Grandpa?”

His father had offered to take them out for sushi. Nagisa thanked everything he could think to thank that Daichi wasn’t really a fussy eater, so he didn’t have to worry about taking him places like that. He definitely had preferences, but there weren’t a lot of things he outright refused. Despite that, he was still small for his age, according to the doctor. Nagisa had just accepted it was probably always be that way, at this point.

He stood up excitedly. “Gran’pa! Wanna see Gran’pa!”

Nagisa looked at him curiously. “Then you need to get ready properly.”

“ _Why_?”

His answer to most things, really. “Well,” Nagisa said, “you might hurt your feet if you walk around with no shoes, plus it seems pretty cold.”

The gears were clearly spinning in Daichi’s mind. Instead of looking at Nagisa, he stared at the wall, as if it held all the secrets in the world. If he was actually going to reply, he was taking his time thinking about it. Apparently he wasn’t going to say anything at all, as it turned out, because instead he pulled himself to his feet and started wandering as if he was heading for his bedroom.

“ _Now_ where are you going?” Nagisa questioned.

“Trucks!” He announced.

Nagisa wasn’t sure how he’d arrived at that conclusion. “Can’t you play with them later?” He picked up the discarded shoes. “There isn’t really enough time right now?”

Apparently he hadn’t been careful enough with showing the shoes, because Daichi seemed to assume Nagisa was going to put them on _for_ him. At least, Nagisa could tell that was what he was thinking, because his face immediately morphed in horror. Anybody would think he was trying to do something worse, than just put his shoes on. It took only a few moments for the real crying to start.

“No,” he complained through the tears, “I do it!”

Nagisa still didn’t really know the best way to deal with this kind of thing. He knew that as a two year old, Daichi couldn’t possibly be expected to have the best handle on his own emotions, or to understand why things were happening as they were. So of course he’d likely be upset, crying about it like he currently was. But that didn’t stop what was like pins and needles in Nagisa’s heart at the sight of it, especially since he’d accidentally caused it.

“You can do it,” he said as softly as possible, putting the shoes down, “I promise.”

Daichi did actually approach him, then, though somewhat tentatively. Whilst still standing up, he took one of the shoes, and tried ungracefully to shove it on his foot. Unsurprisingly, it didn’t really work out for him, and there came a fresh bout of tears. Rather than let him scream about it on the floor, Nagisa quickly reached out to hold him close, which thankfully he didn’t reject.

There was no real knowing what he was actually upset about, whether it was literally just the shoes, or something else had somehow set it off. Whatever the case, he was crying onto Nagisa’s shoulders about it, and that probably wouldn’t stop for a little while. He did actually calm down in a few minutes, though, as Nagisa did his best to actually comfort him.

“Do you want to try again now?” Nagisa tried.

Daichi pulled back, silently nodding as he sat down. This time, since he was a lot less stressed, he managed to get them on like normal, after another minute or two of manoeuvring. He stood up, then, still clearly a little upset but visibly happier with himself. At least that hadn’t turned into _too_ big of a deal. 

“Good job,” Nagisa praised, because he thought it was probably a good thing to encourage positive behaviour. “Are you ready to go?”

He nodded, and so Nagisa moved to open the door, letting Daichi run along out of it first. Of course, he still insisted on walking everywhere in his own. Thankfully, the sushi place wasn’t incredibly far from the apartment. With the fresh air, and space to run around a little, Daichi actually cheered up from his bad mood.

Nagisa’s father was already waiting outside, by the time they arrived. He would have felt bad about being so late, but at least he didn’t look anything other than happy. Naturally, Daichi was overjoyed to see him, speeding into a proper run so he could launch himself. Thankfully, Nagisa’s father was ready for him, able to pick him straight up.

“Hello there Daichan,” he said fondly. “Have you been good since I last saw you?”

Daichi nodded enthusiastically, though Nagisa wasn’t sure he’d entirely agree.

“Well, then we can definitely get dessert!”

“Don’t excite him too much,” Nagisa warned. “He won’t eat otherwise.”

His father smiled. “You look well, Nagisa.”

It was surprising to hear something like that. Nagisa didn’t feel all that well, both emotionally and physically. But maybe he was just doing an extraordinarily good job of hiding it, or else his father didn’t really notice that kind of thing. But given his past reactions to things Nagisa had told him, it wouldn’t be so surprising.

They went into the restaurant together, finding a place where Daichi could sit down safely. Not that he seemed that concerned with sitting, instead instantly drawn to the food moving on conveyor belts. Nagisa knew he was going to have to keep a good eye on him, lest he get too interested and start grabbing out for stuff.

“You can eat in a minute,” Nagisa said, though not scolding.

The meal was actually pretty nice, all things considered. Sushi was his favourite food, anyway, so it was never a bad time when he got to have it. Surprisingly, Daichi seemed a little unsure at first, but hunger seemed to win out, and he ate whatever was put in front of him without much hesitation. All the while, Nagisa’s father engaged him in pleasant conversation, mostly about generic life things.

“How’s Karma doing?” He eventually asked.

Nagisa automatically stiffened at the question. He didn’t want to talk about how Karma was doing, didn’t really know that himself. Of course, it wasn’t entirely unexpected. He knew his parents liked Karma as much as they could do in their circumstances. But Karma always was pretty good at charming the right people when he really needed to. Of course, Nagisa hadn’t brought up their fight.

He looked down at empty plate for a moment. “Pretty good.”

“Good,” he leant back, “that’s great. And you’re good, hmm, Daichan?”

Daichi just looked at him and giggled, a beaming smile all over his face. Instead of actually answering the question, though, he tugged on Nagisa’s sleeve somewhat expectantly. It took Nagisa a second of regarding him, before guessing he was probably thirsty. He reached into his bag, pulling out a juice carton, swiftly piercing it before handing it over.

His father cleared his throat. “Actually, I had some news. Your mother and I have decided to renew our vows.”

It took Nagisa a moment to register what that meant. His parents had been reunited for a while now, he almost forgot that they were technically still divorced. A few years ago, this was all he would have wanted to hear. Though he wasn’t full of tears about it anymore, Nagisa still felt overjoyed about this turn of events. He wanted them to be happy.

“R-really?”

He smiled. “We’re not doing anything for it, just signing papers, but we decided it was about time.”

The rest of their meal followed pretty nicely, with Nagisa feeling light at the announcement. Other than that, his mind drifted off to some far away place. Daichi was far more interested in playing with his grandfather than Nagisa, anyway, so it didn’t matter so much. If anything, Nagisa was happy for him to expend the energy before they returned home.

“Take care of yourself,” Nagisa’s father waved them off.

Daichi ran half of the way back, before evidently running out of steam. It was pretty bad, by the looks of things, like even lifting up his foot was tiring for him. Nagisa’s suspicions were confirmed when Daichi let him pick him up, letting his head flop down onto Nagisa’s shoulder. Of course, Nagisa didn’t mind at all, honestly missing the days this would happen more often.

Nagisa put him straight to bed when they got back, not bothering to undress him further than his shoes. He probably wouldn’t nap for too long, at least, no matter how tuckered out he currently looked. Honestly, Nagisa was looking to the summer break, which was coming up soon enough, since he could spend more time with him. Now that Daichi was a little older, and actually wanted to do things.

The day was average after that. Nagisa defaulted to doing homework, because it was never a bad thing to get that out of the way. Of course, average now meant he and Karma mostly avoiding each other, unless there was a pressing reason not to. Nagisa hadn’t experienced a lot of those reasons, though living in such close quarters they saw each other, every now and then.

He managed to go to bed that night without saying more than a few words to Karma. Nagisa didn’t want it that way, but it was better than the alternative. He didn’t really sleep, though. It was _hard_ , when he’d been so used to Karma being there, holding him. Recently, Nagisa had barely been able to sleep at all, only getting a few unsettled hours here and there.

Though, he was woken up by a large crashing sound, instead of on his own. Nagisa was immediately alert, as anybody would be in such a situation. Unfortunately, he had no weapons in his bedroom, so he decided to just try slowly approaching the door. He stepped out, not detecting any movement, though it was pitch black in the apartment.

Relying on all his past training, Nagisa moved as delicately as he could, barely making a sound. He still couldn’t sense any movement, but there was something, crawling under his skin. What was that? Nagisa side stepped, mapping the layout of his home in his head, until he collided hard with a mass that definitely wasn’t supposed to be there. It was enough to knock him to his feet, at least.

And then the lamp switch was flicked on, and Nagisa blearily realised he’d landed on top of an equally confused looking Karma. That was just his luck. Nagisa scrambled backwards immediately, still on the floor but at least not so close.

“I’m guessing you heard that too,” Karma said eventually.

Nagisa pulled himself to his feet, and took a brief look at things in the light. A couple of the dining chairs were displaced, and some of the things from the kitchen had been pulled out onto the floor… which was probably what had caused the noise. That was even more confusing, though, because he had no idea how it got like that.

His senses told him to check on Daichi, immediately, but there was nothing wrong with him, at first glance he was just asleep in his bed as usual. But there was clearly nobody else there, and Karma hadn’t done it… So what? Nagisa was confused, and a little worried.

Surprisingly, Karma was on the same page. “Hey, maybe this place really _is_ haunted.”

Nagisa jumped. “Huh?”

“Remember when we looked up the whole murder thing before moving in?” Karma said. “I mean, it’s about the right circumstances for ghosts.”

He was almost an _adult_ , so he wasn’t _scared_. But, a lump formed in Nagisa’s throat, no matter how casual Karma had sounded. The wind couldn’t have caused such a loud noise, certainly not that much mess. But there wasn’t any other explanations, jumping to mind. Maybe an earthquake? But that wouldn’t have caused the same kind of noise.

“Ghosts aren’t real,” Nagisa disputed, convincing himself.

Something went across his radar, then. He could sense it in the air, consciousness that wasn’t really steady at all. Looking back into his son’s room, that sense only got stronger. Although he was sure Daichi was there, he definitely wasn’t peaceful in his sleep. Carefully, Nagisa decided to flick the light switch on, not wanting to freak him out with mysterious footsteps.

“Daichi,” he said softly, “what’s wrong?”

Finally, Daichi’s head poked up from under the covers. As suspected, tears were streaming down his face. “ _Dada_.”

Nagisa didn’t waste any time going down to his side. Immediately, once he was in reach, Daichi clutched onto him, sobbing into his shoulder. At first, Nagisa couldn’t tell what happened. He was pretty sure Daichi wasn’t _sick_. But, he was shaking in Nagisa’s arms, which meant something had definitely happened.

“Dada and Papa gone,” he got out. “All alone!”

He felt awful, even hearing that. “It was just a bad dream,” Nagisa soothed, “it’s over now.”

“He came to look for us,” Karma supplied, “but got messed up in the dark. He probably pulled open the cupboard in the kitchen by accident and freaked out enough to run back in here.”

Daichi looked up, realising Karma was there. “Papa!”

At his summons, Karma came and knelt down beside Nagisa. “You’re alright.”

Nagisa wasn’t sure what had happened in the actual dream, but Daichi sounded genuinely concerned about them not being there for him. Of course, dreams were dreams, but Nagisa was afraid that something might have set that off. He didn’t want Daichi to ever think for one second that he was being left alone. Nobody deserved that.

“I promise,” Nagisa said, “we’re right here. We’re not going _anywhere_.”

He pulled away, eventually, just a little bit calmer. Nagisa wasn’t sure how to deal with this. If it was anybody else having a nightmare, they’d have the capacity to realise it wasn’t real. He wasn’t sure if Daichi could understand that concept, even if he knew they were right beside him currently. Nagisa decided the best thing he could do for now was just that, to remain close.

“Hey, Daichan, scoot over a little,” Karma suggested. When Daichi obeyed him, Karma actually lay down beside him. Under any other circumstance, it would have been hilarious, since Karma was clearly far too big to fit on a toddler sized bed. “We can lie like this until you fall back asleep.”

Daichi’s eyes were still wide open, though. “Dada…”

“I’m here too,” Nagisa reassured, and then considered it. There was barely any room at all on the bed, mere inches at best, but Nagisa decided to make it work, just about squeezing on to it himself. He stroked Daichi’s hair as soothingly as he could, just so he’d know they were still there.  

Nagisa wasn’t sure how long it took him to drift off again, only that it was a relief when he actually did relax. Shooting Karma a look, it was a small task to extract themselves. They managed it, though, without waking him back up. Nagisa just had to hope he wouldn’t have another episode. Their assassination training really did come in handy, as they were able to get out of the room and close the door almost soundlessly.  

“I just hope he’s okay,” Nagisa said, half to himself.

“He will be. We always did make a good team,” Karma said, a little carefully.

Despite that, Nagisa still felt his stomach flip over. He didn’t have any words to respond to that. Yes, they did work well together, sometimes. That was the key, _sometimes_. If Nagisa could have it any way, they’d work well the whole time. He couldn’t rely on just sometimes. That was no real _life_. It didn’t matter how much his heart called out for Karma, no matter how much it shattered at the thought of never having him.

“Nagisa,” Karma breathed out, “I’m, I mean, I shouldn’t have done what I did.”

It was almost funny, that Nagisa wanted to question what part of it he thought was so wrong. How far could they trace back the actions he shouldn’t have taken? Not that Nagisa was completely innocent, either. Why was Karma saying this now, anyway? An apology was rare from him, and springing it on Nagisa like this made his head spin.

“Why?” It was the only thing he could think of saying.  

Karma didn’t say anything for a moment. “It hurt you.”

Nagisa refused to look him in the eye. “You’ve always been a sadist.”

“It doesn’t make me _happy_ ,” Karma snapped. “Even when I caused it, it just doesn’t work anymore, to see you in pain. It’s not satisfying, or funny, or anything. It just sucks.”

He wasn’t sure how to take that at all. It was a nice thing to hear, but that didn’t undo all of their issues. It was also hard to tell how deeply Karma really meant that, or whether he was just _saying_ it. He seemed serious, at least. It made Nagisa feel a little uncomfortable, though, that Karma was implying he would have liked to hurt Nagisa before.

“I don’t want you to _change_ ,” Nagisa let out.

Karma just shrugged. “I can’t choose what to _want_. As much as I’d like to.”

Was Nagisa supposed to take this as a huge compliment, or something? Or, he didn’t know what Karma’s real intent was. It didn’t help than everything other than the rational part of his brain wanted to rush into Karma’s arms and accept that as enough. But no, that was a vicious cycle, Nagisa saw that now.

“I want you to be my friend,” Karma tried, when Nagisa didn’t respond, though he looked uncomfortable saying those words.

“Friend.”

There was no way such a statement wouldn’t hurt. Though it could never happen, Nagisa was still in love with him. He didn’t know the specifics of what Karma felt for him, but it wasn’t friendship. Suggesting such a thing sounded ridiculous.

Karma lowered his head. “I’ve never seen you as just like a normal friend. Not even from the start.”

“Maybe family is a closer word,” Nagisa finally supplied. The idea of being ‘friends’ seemed foreign and wrong and not at all enough.

Straightening up, Karma nodded. “Nagisa,” he said, perhaps in the most serious tone Nagisa had heard from him, “I wish we could forget about what happened.”

“I can’t,” Nagisa immediately dismissed. “Karma, it’s too much. Not just that one argument, everything else. I can’t forget about it.”

“I know,” he said, maintaining his serious voice. “But that doesn’t mean I want to argue about it anymore. So, truce?” He held out a palm.

Considering him for a moment, Nagisa decided to take it. “Okay.”

Like that, Karma’s shoulders dropped, and he let go of Nagisa’s hand. “Well, anyway, I’m going back to bed. I forgot what it was like to wake up to our demon child at weird times in the night. I don’t really miss it. Night.”

“Don’t call him that,” Nagisa lightly scolded. “Goodnight.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, so, apologies for the delay. I kind of broke my foot (whilst drinking vodka- alcohol is bad kids), which was not good. I'm okay, but it's going to take a month or so to heal. Since I had that, and university to deal with, it took me a bit longer to finish this. But anyway! I hope you enjoyed it! 
> 
> They're taking a step in a good direction now, so at least there's that. I'm honestly so excited to get to 'part three' of this fic... which will hopefully be soon but you never know what random chapters I'll add in between.

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on Tumblr at livixbobbiex


End file.
